Reading Reviews From Member: potterfan310
  
333 Reviews Found

Review #26, by potterfan310Your Average Crazy: Enemies

17th April 2013:
Aww, this chapter. So sad :'(

I really hope theres more Jallow, because they really need to get together!!!

CC-
Up until Willow and James entered the forest the spacing was fine but after that it sorta bunched up and was slightly hard to read.

-Potterfan310
Soph x

Author's Response: Yeah, it is :( !
I cried :'( .
Jallow... there are more... complications, I guess? They do need to be together, though. Making it a priority.
I'll have a look at the spacing. It's a real pain in the behind. Probably can't do anything about it for a while, as this computer doesn't like the whole thing. I've tried fixing up the second chapter, but I only got a quarter of it done, if that.
Cheers, SW.


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Review #27, by potterfan310Spontaneous: Blame It On The Hormones

16th April 2013:
I really like your Dom, she seems aboslutely insane!

Haha I love Scarlett, first talking to her stomach and now her hair, I definitely think the pregnancy hormones have got to her. :)

I think the fact Scarlett trusts Rose alot when she tells her who the father is the second she asks. I did think it a little odd, wouldn't Scarlett have some inner thoughts about whether she should tell Rose or not. E.g she might not want to tell her because she might tell James, she wants James to find out first or she might hesitate a little before saying it's James. But it's your story so it's up to you!

Rose's reaction was a little short, and possibly a tad over dramatic but who knows, that may just be Rose's personality. Instead of her just barging past and out the dorm perhaps she could confront Scarlett and ask why her cousin, or how it happend? , again it's up to you since its your story.

Tips - your formatting/layout seems a bit off. The first half was fine but then once found the test it sorta all bunched up. It can make the chapter flow better if the spacing is all equal.

"a towel wrapped around her waist" - Did she not have a towel over her top half? Perhaps say 'a towel wrapped around her body'

Descriptions - Again add a little detail here and there, it'll also bulk out your chapters as well.

There were a few little things like missing apostrophy's, capitals, missing letters and full stops, nothing a read over won't fix.

Looking forward to the next one!

10/10
-Potterfan310
Soph x :D

Author's Response: thanks for pointing that out.
mistakes are all fixed :)


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Review #28, by potterfan310I love you, Mum: Chapter 15

15th April 2013:
A'www so freakin' cute. I love that Tyler now knows James is his daddy and that he actually called him daddy for the first time. So adorable!! ♥ ♥

Hopefully James and Nikki will get closer and eventually get together. Maybe something will happen when they get back to Hogwarts?? and I wonder if Alexia will cause trouble when they're back by telling the whole school Nikki's a mum.

Can't wait for the next one!!

-Potterfan310
Soph xx :)

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Review #29, by potterfan310Choices: Books and Brothers

15th April 2013:
I've said it before and I'll say it again JAMES IS SO GOD DAMN SUPERMEGAFOXYAWESEOMEHOT AMAZING!

"I present to you the man who killed Voldemort. Frightened of his own wife." - I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this line especially since James is not only a mummy's boy but just like his father he's scared of Ginny. Not too mention most of the other girls/women he knows ♥ ♥

Aww I love Ginny, she's just such an awesome mother. I think it's great she's all laid back and is like 'go do whatever, "Selene's already pregnant, so what’s the worst that can happen."

Love George!!! and drunk Ginny!! "I had an odd aversion to clothes and was prone to stripping down and running about the neighborhood starkers." - The funny thing is I can actually see James doing this, bless him. Laughing so hard it's unreal! :D

N'aww when Harry and James had their little moment awww. I'm sat here awwing out loud, it's so adorable.

"I don't understand why tea is always associated with England and the U.K. in general. We're not a bunch of tea-obsessed nutters like other countries..." - I agree with this so much, I hate tea with a passion and I live in the UK. I really don't understand all the fuss about it, coffee is so much nicer.

Ohmygod, the book. Crying with laughter!! And James "The terrible book of horrors."

Al and James bonding, *insert me awwing about a hundred times here* The Potters brothers are so adorable. And I like that Al's giving James advice even though he went for advice off him.

'Mu mum's, especially' - My instead of Mu.
'in a pool of jello' - Jelly is the UK name for Jello.
'Book of Horrors of my bed' - Off my bed instead of of.

Oh god, James never fails to make me laugh. Can he just get over his awkwardness and ask Sleene out.for.gods.sake. she's.already.carrying.his.baby. Can they just get together already??

When James metioned C'est La Vie, all I could think of was the song and it was playing in my mind as I read the end of this chapter.

So much Jelene ♥ ♥
I LOVE THIS CHAPTER SO MUCH!!!

12/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx :D

Author's Response: Hello dearest! I always look forward to your reviews. They're so wonderful and amusing and you're just fabulous.

Yes, James really does take after Harry when it comes to that whole "fear of women" thing. Although, in their defense, the women they tend to associate with tend to be rather intimidating.

I'm glad you liked the tea thing! I am not from the UK, I'm from America. But I figured they're really not as obsessed with tea as we jokingly purport you all to be. I don't like tea either. Or coffee, for that matter. Like James, I drink hot chocolate.

Thanks for pointing out the mistakes! Like I said, this chapter was completely unedited, so I'll have to go back and fix those.

The thing about James is he's a horrible procrastinator. He puts things off for as long as he can. So he might need a bit of a push (read: a giant push many many times) before he asks her out. IF he asks her out, that is ;)

Thanks again for such a fabulous review!

-Laura


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Review #30, by potterfan310Unplanned: Frustration

14th April 2013:
Ohmygod, I love that they've gone to different restaurant's to get free food.

Nate is really adorable *squishes him tightly* and him and Reese together, they're brilliant!

The cousin who smells like soup, haha nice touch. There always seem's to be one person in a family who smells of something. :)

Oooh I really like that Nate works in the magical world and for Harry, it's a small world eh. It seems like a really interesting job.

Aww no, fighting between Jarissa :( THEY HAVE TO GET THROUGH IT!!! THEY JUST HAVE TO!!! Jarissa for life!!! ♥ ♥

Can't wait to see what happens next and if Jarissa have sorted their problems out.

10/10
-Potterfan310
Soph x

Author's Response: ahaha I'm glad you liked it! :p

They do get through it, don't worry. :D

Thanks for the lovely review! :D


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Review #31, by potterfan310Unpredictable: Chapter 2

11th April 2013:
I LOVE your take on James because as you may have noticed I have a little obsession with the Potter brothers. He's great even though he can be slightly annoying but I think he's got a great personality!

It's intresting to see that James isn't the 'hottest guy at Hogwarts' which is really nice and original!! :)

Me thinks Jamesie has a little crush on Maeve hence the compliments but who knows, he just might not want to lose a chaser ;D

I think Dom's an interesting character and she's totally differnet from other Dom's that I've read!!!

Please, please don't say Maeve is the one who breaks James' heart. I hope it's someone else and then Maeve comes in and BOOM! they get together! ♥ ♥ :)

10/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx ♥

Author's Response: I'm afraid I can't tell you anything, you must keep reading ;) -Thank you so much for taking the time to review and please stay tuned for the next chapter x

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Review #32, by potterfan310Twist of Fate: Black

9th April 2013:
Why hello new chapter. It's great to see Vivian again!!!

I really like that Scorpius has a sister because he's normally an only child. And that she's named after Lucius.

I love that she and Scorp are really close and that he stay with her. I was upset with Albus because her didn't turn up when Vi needed him the most.

I was slightly confused when Vi was by her mum's gravestone. You said she was sobbed into Albus' robes but if Al wasn't there, then how could she? Or did you mean Scorpius/James?

One other thing, Lily has brown eyes not blue.

I think the Vi and Lily bonding is really sweet, especially as we haven't seen a lot of Lily. I was nearly in tears, there are no words to describe this chapter. All of Vi's feelings are spot on and I feel so bad for her. And the fact the Potter's and Some of the Weasley were at the funeral as well, I thought that was a nice touch.

This chapter is full of feels!!!

When Ginny said "You know you can always call here you home, don’t you" It just tipped me over the edge and I had to wipe away a tear. Vi's never really had a home apart from Hogwarts and it's so sweet of Ginny to say that. ♥ ♥ ♥

Aww Albus, Ohmygod!! I can't believe he said he would always be waiting for Vi. He's so adorable, where can I find a guy like him?

The moment between Vi and Al at the end, awww. I am literally awwing out loud. It's just so adorable and I love it. I'm so glad that Al no longer hates Vi and he's taking an intrest in her and the baby. ♥

12/10
-Potterfan310
Soph ♥ xxx :D

Author's Response: Hey Soph,

It's nice to see you again too :) sorry it took me so long to update, I hope the next update will be quicker.

I loved giving Scorpius a sibling because somehow I don't think Draco would have wanted only one child because of what he went through on his own as a kid. I think he would have wanted his children to at least have someone else, a sibling, who was going through the same things as them, especially with all the stigma attached to a Malfoy name. And Luciana is such a sweet little thing. I can't really say why I named her after Lucius but the name just seemed sort of fitting.

Scorpius is like Vivian's brother, they have known each other since birth and he is the one person in her life that she would trust all her secrets too. Hell, he's the only one who knows all her secrets. Albus is going through a lot of mixed feelings at the moment, he is torn between loving Vivian and hurting from her betrayal.

Thanks for pointing that out, I might have to make that a little clearer. It was actually Albus who was the last pall bearer of her mother's coffin so he was actually there, Vivian just didn't see him properly. He was just not sure if she wanted him there, or how he should act around her. I'm going to do a one shot from his point of view of Vivian's mother's death which might help clear up what he is thinking.

Ah yes, I don't know if you've checked out my blog but it has picture of my character's face claims and the one for Lily has blue eyes. I know it isn't strictly cannon but I figured it wasn't too much of an issue, especially as a lot of people on her mum's side of the family, if not her mum, have blue eyes. So yeah, I took a bit of writer's freedom on that one.

Lily seems a bit forgotten in my stories which never strikes me as fair so I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to introduce her and give her perspective on things.

The Potters (and therefore the extended Weasley clan), despite all the circumstances, view Vivian as part of their family and therefore would be there for her whenever she needed them, especially at a time like this.

There is a lot of emotion in this, I am never sure how much to put in before it goes completely over the top. So thank you very much for that.

For me, Ginny is quite a mother figure, much like her own mother and she watched Harry grow up without a real home and she just wants Vivian to know in the same way that Harry knew, that she is a part of their family. I loved writing that bit.

That whole part was completely unexpected, I hadn't intended for them to talk for a while yet but this just popped into my head and it fitted much better than my previous plan. Despite everything, he loves her and he always will be there for her. He just need to sort out his own life first. (As for where to find one like him, I have no idea but if you manage to find out, please let me know).

Awww... Thank you. I don't think he ever really hated her. He could never hate her. He was just really hurt. But things are far from over yet.

Thank you so much for a wonderful review and I hope to update soonish,

With love,
GirlOnTheSidelines x


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Review #33, by potterfan310The Sidekick: Don't Get Pregnant, Kids

8th April 2013:
OHMYGOD!

Neville and Hannah = no more :'( So sad, poor Chase

CC-
Brit picking - "My mom has" and you said mom instead of mum a couple of other times.

"Louis’s" - You don't need the S on the end after the appostrophy.

My favourite part was Louis' closet. I love that he's a secret One Direction fan. :)

I think the I.L is really cool and original. I've never heard of anything like it before!! I'm guessing the I.L stands for instant letter?

Aww Molly's talk with Neville = so sweet. I love that she's trying to get him and Luna together. It was very Molly-ish of her to cook for an army of well!!!

11/10
-Potterfan310
Soph x :)

Author's Response: Oh dear, I always forget to translate my American speech for British sayings ;(

As for "Louis's", it's grammatically correct either way, and I like to write it that way so that it's clear that it's the French pronunciation :) Thank you for the heads up, though!

I always saw Louis as a One Direction fan, not sure why x) I picture him having Liam as a favorite, I must say.

I'm not quite sure where I came up with the idea for I.L., but once I did I thought it was a great idea and immediately wanted to include it in my story. I'm glad you think it's cool!! (:

Ah, yes, I LOVE Molly. It's to the point where I practically picture her as being semi-omniscient, haha.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!! x


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Review #34, by potterfan310Spontaneous: Fine And Dandy

6th April 2013:
I love reading James/OC stories and I love reading teen prgenancy.

I really like your OC Scarlett, she's funny and likeable. Especially her conversation with herself, she seems like a really good character.

I was slightly confused in the first chapter if she was in the entrance hall in the broom cupboard then how did she run to the dorm (I'm assuming she's a Gryffindor and their tower's up on the 7th floor), could you clear that up for me please?

"Yes. It is the famous Harry Potter's fault that I'm pregnant at 16." - This has to be my favourite line!! :D

I really like this so far and I'm intirgued as to where it will go, especially since Al became quite protective over Scarlett.

CC-
- Maybe add some more descriptions, like was the boys dorm messy and stuff like that.

- Background, I'm not sure if this is coming in later chapter but Scarlett's background and how she and James came to do the deed that lead to her being pregnant. What is her home life/parents like. Did she and James just choose each other randomly or did they secretly like each other and then sexual tension got to much.

- Capital letters, there were a few things that should have had caps. I maninly noticed when Scarlett was talking to her head and stomach. The start of the sentences were missing them.

Looking forward to the next chappie :)
10/10
-Potterfan310
Soph x

Author's Response: Yay a reviewww! And a long one too!
I'm really glad you like it, and like Scarlett too. She's an easy going character that I love writing!

As for when you were confused in the first chapter...I guess I didn't write that out properly. No, it doesn't make sense really, now I've read it over. Thanks for pointing that out, I'll change it soon. For now let's just say she's a fast runner :/

Yes...Al...mwahahahhaa...he will be very prominent in chapters 9-10ish but don't tell anyone, okay?

And thank you, thank you, thank you for the constructive criticism! I haven't had any yet, but I definitely need it.
- descriptions: WILL PUT SOME IN OR OTHERWISE ROSE WITH HIT ME VERY HARD OVER THE HEAD. I promise I will *pinky promise*
- backgrounds: ah, that comes in soon, don't worry. This story has a lot to take in at the start, so I didn't really put much background in. But there definitely is background soon!
- capital letters: I'm so so sorry! My computer formatting/what-in-the-Merlin/technology stuff doesn't like HPFF. Whenever I change my writing to fit the HPFF likings, all punctuation, like capital letters and commas, gets deleted. I go through it, but if I've missed some, I'm very sorry! I hope I cleared that up though!

Thank you for the huge review, I really appreciate it, and so does my hair :)
My inner Scarlett is dying to come out but I must contain her.
She's very childish and hard to control.
Again, thanks for reviewing!

- Ravenclaws Princess x


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Review #35, by potterfan310I love you, Mum: Chapter 14

6th April 2013:
The hate I have for Alexia, she's such a horrible, horrible person. Who can hit a toddler and not feel bad about it. Can I please push her off the astronomy tower???

OHMYGOD, OHMYGOD, OHMYGOD!
I AM SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW *insert fangirl squeal here* I can't believe they kissed!!! ♥ ♥

I really hope they get together and then they can be a happy family. I'm so glad James has dumped Alexia, hopefully she's gone for good.

I can't wait for the next chapter to see what happens, will James and Nikki be cival towards each other or will they be a couple!! :D

12/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx

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Review #36, by potterfan310Against the Odds: The Forgotton

4th April 2013:
This chapter, OHMYGOD!!! My heart was racing as I read it. James knows and he's completely freaked out. No surprise there, I mean if you found out you were gonna be a dad when she's already four months pregnant, that's gotta be hard.

I squealed when James' entered the office. I'm so glad he wants to know. I offically love him now!!!

I really dislike Violet's mum. She really mean. Poor Violet, I just want to give her hugs.

ASDFGHJKLASDDGFHJKL! THEY HAVE TO GET TOGETHER, THEY WERE MADE FOR EACH OTHER!!! I'm so, so happy right now. James wants to be a part of it and I really, really hope they get together! :) ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

"raiding a child" - Think you meant raising :)

I love this chapter so much and James is a cutie. Really can't wait for the next one!

11/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx :D

Author's Response: Haha, I'm so glad you enjoyed it! I agree with you about James finding out; one of the many reasons I am glad to be a girl ;) And I noticed the "raiding a child" mistake after I had submitted the chapter, and I didn't want to edit it and sent it to the back of the queue since I had already waited so long to update the story! I'll fix it soon :)

Thank you so much for reviewing :D x


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Review #37, by potterfan310Psychos and Psychologists : Problem Number One

1st April 2013:
Your summary was really unusual and I was so intigued that I had to read it, I'm so glad I did :)

I LOVE Coral's name, it's so unusual and unique. I names that no one else is likely to have!!

Until I read that Coral was 16, I really thought that she was in her early twenties/middle aged or something.

I realy like your characterisation of her, she seems like a fun person as well as being sorta of a mother hen because of giving advice and that she loves to help people.
I really like this so far. I think this really original and I've never read anything like it.

I'm curious as to why James calls her Coco?
I like the reasons behind their nicknames, espcially Coral's being Rocky!! :D

I'm in agreement with Rose, seeing Mcgonagall drunk would be way funnier than Slughorn.

It's nice to see Albus in a different light, okay so he's the golden boy but now he's turning bad and it's just really unexpected. I like it!!

"Hold up. They want me to help HARRY POTTER?" - Haha, love that she thinks she has to help Harry.

For some reason I think that Albus' change might have to do with drugs. The mood swings, violence, totally different personality. I don't know why but I have a feeling.

I can't wait to read the next chaprer and see more of Coral's personality and how their relationship develop as a counselour/patient and of thet become a couple.

Definitely adding it to my favs!!!

10/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx

Author's Response: Thank you for such a long lovely review! :D

I totally agree with you - I too, find Coral a really pretty name! And i got another reviwer confused about Coral's age. Maybe i should change that in the summary..
Thank you so much! I tried to keep the idea as original as possible and i didn't see any other story on hpff with this ides - so i thought i should try it out! I'm so glad you liked it :)

Well, Coco is one of her other nicknames which James has taken a liking to. So. I too wanted to portray Albus differently. In very few stories he's been portrayed as a bad boy so once again why not try a new idea! As for Albus's problem - you'll just have to wait and see ;)

Thank you so much for reading! I'll try to update as soon as i can :) x


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Review #38, by potterfan310I love you, Mum: Chapter 13

1st April 2013:
I'm so, so glad James has taken to father hood so well. He's such a cutie around Tyler. Who is so adorable!!!

Urgh, Alexia. She's so horrible and mean. I can't believe she insulted Tyler, I mean he's the cutest little thing.

"St. Mungo" - Add an apostrophy and an 's' on the end of Mungo's

Brit picking - Diaper bag - It would either be a changing bag or a nappy bag. I think you mentioned it in the previous chapter as well.

So glad you're back, I've missed this story a lot!!!

10/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx

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Review #39, by potterfan310Not a Mistake: Chapter Six

1st April 2013:
"I heard him mutter 'and I want you.'" - Yes!! Albus and Lexi have to get together!!

CC-
"her want in it." - I think you mean wand and it might might a bit more sense if it was 'to' instead of 'it'. Her wand to it.

"smiled and pit them in the" - I think you meant 'put' not 'pit'.

I really thought it would have been a boy (because surely if James saw a mini-him he would change his mind) but I'm glad it's a girl and that Lexi is happy.

Oh Lily, I know she crazy and excited but she spilled it. Although she didn't say which brother. I love that they think it's Al instantly and that he stuck by Lexi for saying it was.

I really hope that Al and Lexi get together because at least then, the baby can call Al daddy and it won't be too suspicious if the baby looks like James.

I hope that James tries to talk to Lexi at least, especially now he knows it's a girl.

Can't wait for the next chapter!!!
10/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx

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Review #40, by potterfan310Redemption: Cornered

31st March 2013:
Aww bless Lily, at least she was making some progress. Speaking to those she doesn't know.
I'm curious is the guy who jumped at her Jake or Jason?? :/

"Mr Dudley's so much hotter than Zabini!" - For a second I thought is said Dursley not Dudley and I just burst out laughing. And then I realised what it actually said. :D

I like doctor Lupine, she's helping Lily a lot and I think that she may eventually get the truth from Lily about why she does it.

I'm looking forward to the next chapter. I hope that Harry and Ginny come and visit Lily soon.

10/10
-Potterfan310
Soph x

Author's Response: Yeah, I kept on wondering why I did a double take whenever checking this chapter- Dursley, Dudley. I'm glad you like Dr Lupine, and and are still enjoying the story! I think it was Jason who jumped her, not Jake, though the names are all sort of similiar. Thanks for reviewing, it'll be updated soon! :)

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Review #41, by potterfan310Unplanned: Dreams

29th March 2013:
Poor Reese, freaking out like that. She sure does have parental issues if she feels that way about marriage.

I thought it was such a British thing about the tea. One can never have enough cups (Or so I'm told, since I don't actually like tea).

Reese you little beauty for working it out, not too mention my prediction was right!!!

I panicked alot when James was telling Reese that they might be too serious. So, so, so glad there won't be any break-ups. (At least I hope not)

I have so many feels for the chapter because it's just so adorable and filled with fluff!! Jarissa, Scorose and the Weasleys = Perfect and a very happy me!!! ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Can't wait for the next chapter, I'm guessing it's going to be James' birthday dayout.

12/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx

Author's Response: ahaha yeah... Let's face it, most girls that get pregnant at a young age have A LOT of problems. :p I wanted to try and portray that in here. And parents, they fight and FIGHT AND FIGHT and then act normal. :p It's normal, but when people suffer from mental issues they don't realise that... :/

So yeah. :p

Personally I hate tea, but everyone I know LOVES tea. I don't see the big fuss of it, but everyone seems to love it. :p

Yes! You were right! :D

I'm so glad you liked it! Thanks for the lovely review! :)


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Review #42, by potterfan310The Sidekick: Poison and Breaking Windows

28th March 2013:
Oh god, the twins seem like such lunatics. What with backwards flying and poisoning people.

Aww Louis, can I hug him because he is seriously cute. Not a bad word to say about Chase, me thinks that boy has it bad for her ;)

Chase and Louis = can they get together already, they are so cute!!!

What does the letter say???!!! I'm so, so curious. From Neville's reaction I'm thinking maybe someone died?

Why did you leave it hanging there!!! I have to know what that letter says and why Chase's life is gonna change forever!

Seriously cannot wait for the next chappie!!

11/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx :D

Author's Response: I know, I know, but I imagine that the offspring of Luna WOULD be quite the oddballs, haha.

Yes, yes, Louis is an absolute sweetypie xD

You'll have to wait for the next chapter to find out what it said!! But I promise I won't take forever to update this time!
Thank you for reading!!


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Review #43, by potterfan310Hormones: The Proposal

27th March 2013:
My 300th review :)

Squeal of joy :D Thanks for a dedication I think I may have just freaked out a teeny tiny bit :D You're welcome!! because this story is simply awesome!!!

N'aww Freddie sorta taking care of Ryan. Aww Freddie being so worried about her, so adorable. I want him!! ♥ ♥

Mox and Gemma?? I was not expecting that. :)

So much Fryan, I don't think I can cope ♥ ♥

I'm really intigued about Ryan's backstory. And I can't wait for the next chapter!!

12/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx :D

Author's Response: WOW THREE HUNDRED OMG. Congrats! That's a serious milestone and I'm honored it's on my story!

I appreciate all of your stellar reviews :)

I love how much Freddie cares. And it's confusing HIM how much he cares.

Thank you so much for the review! And the wonderful rating!


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Review #44, by potterfan310Not a Mistake: Chapter Five

27th March 2013:
Oh my gosh, Al is so adorable for trying to get James to se sense. He's such a cutie.

I really like your take on why Alexia's bump isn't show. It's really original and sounds believable. :)

I did notcie a few little mistakes but nothing a read through won't find.

I really do hope Al and Alexia get together, they're so cute together!!

10/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx

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Review #45, by potterfan310I'll love her enough for both of us: Hiding in the dormitory

23rd March 2013:
N'aww this chapter is so adorable. I love that his family are so supportive!!

Louis and Horatio = awesome bromance! :D

Louis, Vic and Dom = cuteness overload, so adorable. I love that they're willing to share so that Freya and the baby can have a room and stay. ASDFGHJKL!! I love them so much. If Freya's parents do kick her out at least shelll have somewhere to stay .

Can't wait to see more progress on the Freya front. I really hope she and the baby will use the room at somepoint :)

11/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx

Author's Response: Louis's family are very supportive, they're the best family :D

Ah yes Louis and Horatio do have a good bromance. They're very good for each other.

I'm so glad that you like Louis, Vic and Dom, they're such good brothers and sisters. Aww :D I'm so glad that you love them :D

I hope you continue reading to find out more :D All of your questions will be answered.

Thank you for reading and reviewing!


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Review #46, by potterfan310Not a Mistake: Chapter Four

22nd March 2013:
I really like this chapter because there's more of Lexi and of Al and of course Lily.

I think it's great that Lily's trying to fix their love lives since she probably hasn't got that much experience herself.

My favourite line has to be "James just donated some DNA." - It's brillant and I love Lily for saying it. :)

I can't believe Lexi and Al kissed!!! asdfghjkkl!!! I hope they stay friends, and maybe become smething more ;)

Again you could do with a few more description, perhaps describe what the boys dorm is like. Is it messy?, does it smell? that sort of thing.

10/10
-Potterfan310
Soph x :)

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Review #47, by potterfan310Fraternizing with the Enemy: Chapter II

20th March 2013:
I'm glad most of her friends know.
I really can't wait for her parents. It'll be interesting how they treat Ava, will they disown her?, will they be angry?

I'm really excited for James' reaction since A) He's the daddy and B) From the looks of it, he'll be the last to know at this rate.

Where stop one scene and end another, perhaps add a page break or a few stars ** to idicate a new scene instead of just a big gap.

Perhaps few more descriptions of what the characters look like or where they are.

Can't wait until the next one :)
-Potterfan310
Soph x

Author's Response: Oooh, I'm excited for her parents' reaction too ;D

I don't usually do this, but I was planning to put up a few chapters then go over and edit them - going over things that might not make sense and putting stars or something between paragraphs.

I think I might put in a few descriptions later on ... but I'm not sure. We'll see :)

Thanks for the review!xxx


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Review #48, by potterfan310Unplanned: Responsibility

19th March 2013:
THIS CHAPTER!!! ASDFGHJKL!

Louis and Colleen, Lily's letter, Albus sending Lily pictures of cats, Reese finding the ring box!!! So much stuff, so little time to fangirl.

I have doubts about who's the ring is. It may be James' (which I hope it is) since it fell from his stuff but what if it fell from Scorpius' jacket and it's meant for Rose. I have all these feels right now and it's just asdfghjkl!!

You wondeful/evil person for leaving such a cliffhanger!
Seriously in need of the the next chapter or I might go insane/die. I need my Jarissa ♥ ♥

12/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xxx

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it!

All will be revealed in the next chapter, never fear! :D

Thanks for the lovely review, again! :D


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Review #49, by potterfan310Secrets Can't Be Secrets Forever: Chapter Twelve

16th March 2013:
The summary for this chapter, OHMYGOD. I THOUGHT FOR A MOMENT THAT ALICE WAS DEAD. SO GLAD SHE ISN'T!

I was right about James being Maisy's dad. I'm really, really excited for the next chapter to see Emma's reaction as well as her telling James and what his reaction will be.

I'm also really, really excited to see if James and Alice get together and how their relationship will play out especially if Alice is a muggle.
It'll be interesting to see how James reacts and if he'll take to father hood easily. I can't wait to see Harry and Ginny's reactions. My bet is Ginny will probably hit him and ask him why he didn't tell her sooner. :)

I lvoe this chapter so much!!
10/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx :D

Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much for this review! ^_^ You just made my day :D I had high hopes that the summary would crush peoples' souls so I'm really happy that worked out ^_^ Thanks for the review, I'm really glad you're enjoying the story :) xx

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Review #50, by potterfan310Not Another Fairytale.: Once Upon A Time...

14th March 2013:
I read this the first time, and I was completely in love with Skylar and Albus so do forgive me if I forget she isn't Skylar anymore.

I was really interested by the new summary as well since I LOVE Al/OC.

I really LOVE the start, it sets up this potrait of what her life was like. I was slightly confused as to why she's called Daisy if her name is Theodosia but I think it might be a nickname?

I really like the dynamics of the sleepover because it wasn't just your average girly get together because the boys were dare and it turned to truth or dare. (Which can be a dangerous game ;))

Oh god James in Ginny's underwear, too funny for words to describe!! I love James and he's such a brilliant character :)

One thing, I think you missed the s of it's - "It' simple."

I'm really intrigued about Daisy's background what with her alcoholic father and evil step-mother. I kinda have an inkling that it might have been her dad who gave her the bruise on her arm.

Way to go Daisy, all I can think is famous last words. She said she wouldn't kiss Al and then what does she go and do: kiss Al.

Love it and I can't wait for the next chappie!

10/10
-Potterfan310
Soph xx

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