Reading Reviews From Member: HappyMollyWeasley
  
193 Reviews Found

Review #1, by HappyMollyWeasleyGloria: Gloria

23rd June 2015:
Hi! This is Molly again for our review swap. Thanks for agreeing on yet another swap!

Wow, this was beautiful! But I hadn't expected anything else from your writing. You've got an extraordinary way of writing which makes your stories poetic and beautiful, even when the plot may be sad or cruel. I hope you're writing OF too, because I'm positive your writing style would be much appreciated outside HPFF too.

"One of us will be blackened beyond the night and deep into Hell; the other glorified beyond belief, raised to the right-hand side of God."

This made me think of Jesus Christ Superstar, (Don't ask me why, though...) when the apostles are singing about writing the gospels. Something about letting Judas be the only one to take the blame for what happened. People like good and evil, black and white, right or wrong. So yes, it's true, one would be glorified and the other one "blackened beyond the night". And that's what happened too, wasn't it?

I'm usually not fond of writing in second person, (I absolutely avoid it, if I've got the possibility...), but somehow you've managed to write it in a way that works. To be honest I must tell you that I had read quite a few paragraphs before I even noticed the second person POV, which I suppose proves that the style of writing suits the story well. But if I could have one single wish it still would be to skip the second person writing... ;-)

I like how you're exploring the differences between their dreams and great ambitions, and the fact that they're also humans and lovers. The difference between day and night, public and private.

The love between them is essential to this story, and it's almost palpable. Love, or obsession? It's so strong and consuming that it's scary.

So the decision to duel Gellert was a way for Albus to save him in a way... Well, that's makes sense to me, but I hadn't thought about it in that way before. It's almost to cruel to be true, though. Albus is breaking his heart to save his love. "This betrayal will kill him just as much as it will save him."

Your story left me feeling sad and thinking about love and life. Thanks for sharing this beautiful piece with us!

/Molly

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Review #2, by HappyMollyWeasleyL'optimisme: Meter

20th June 2015:
Hi!

It's Molly here with the review for our swap. :-)

First I have to say that I'm so very impressed by your writing. It's unusual to come across stories which are of such high quality chapter after chapter. Every chapter of this is well-measured and poetic, and although I recognise the form of it by now you still manage to surprise me and keep my attention to the story. It's a long story, and one could think it would become boring after a while, because the pace is so slow, but you manage to keep every chapter interesting and important.

So it took fifteen years for Albus to finally reach out to Aberforth. It's quite a long time. But then, he had strong reasons. Although I can understand Aberforth too, it's not all Albus' fault that it took so long. During those fifteen years one might think that Aberforth could have became a little softer and contacted his brother too... Well, I'm glad they've found each other again anyway. Albus has been alone for so long, and family is family after all.

I smiled at the mentioning of Aberforth's goats. I hope you'll include his goat related scandal in this story somehow... :-)

I like how you intertwine the Muggle war with the wizarding world. I know it's canon, but it's an aspect which is often forgotten in fanfiction. The worlds are not separate from each other, but depending on each other in many ways. It'll be interesting to see where you'll lead this storyline.

/Molly

Author's Response: Hey Molly! :) Thank you so much for stopping by again - I'm so so glad you still like this! :)

Gah, thank you so so much! :) It's strange for me writing this story because I'm not used to writing things which are so long, and I struggle sometimes therefore to feel like it's as good? Like I never feel that the later chapters live up to the first ones and I'm always worried they're rubbish in comparison, so thank you so much! It's so great to hear that! :) I really try to pick situations which are important but also able to be extrapolated with regards to the overarching theme of the story, so thank you - I'm so glad you think they're working! :)

Yeah, it's a long time. But in canon they don't have much beyond a sort of working relationship, really - they're definitely not close - but I wanted the initial reach out to happen earlier - but not too early. Losing a sister and feeling like it was your fault is a pretty big thing, after all. And yeah, it's sort of both of their faults - and Gryffindor courage in the end, for Albus to manage it :P And yes! Family is so important! :)

Haha, I have plans for that, actually! It will definitely be mentioned - at least once, if not more. It's one of those moments which isn't necessary to include but I want to, you know? It's such a great bit :P

Thank you so much! :) I really love history and given the canon timeline and how it's meant to intertwine, I really couldn't leave it out at all - and I like including it, too. I think things maybe make more sense that way?

Thank you so so much for the lovely review - it was so great to get, and I'm just so glad you're still enjoying the story! :)

Aph xx


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Review #3, by HappyMollyWeasleyA Long Time Coming: The End

5th June 2015:
Hi!

This is Molly (Finally!) here with the second of the reviews for our swap. (You just keep adding new stories... This one wasn't here last time I checked, but it seemed interesting, so I thought I should give it a try!)

Tom Riddle Sr is a man I haven't thought about almost at all. He's not pictured very often in fan fiction, at least not in the stories I read.

You did a great job in describing both how surprised and confused he must have been to find himself facing his son, and how scary it must be to realise that his son is some kind of manic. There's no empathy and no reasoning in the younger man's mind.

But Tom Riddle Sr isn't an all too compassionate and loving man himself, I suppose... It's interesting to think about what formed Voldemort. Genes? Neglect? Destiny?

I was surprised that you continued the story beyond his death, and I think you did it very well. First how his soul kind of lingers, still angry and afraid, and then the surprise of being in a strange version of heaven. It's hardly the kind of heaven he imagined anyway...

This one-shot was really different from what I've been reading before, and I think you did a great job here. Things are never black or white, but something in between. There are lots of reasons why things end up one way or another too.


Molly

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Review #4, by HappyMollyWeasleyIsabella: A Midnight Surprise

1st June 2015:
Hi!

This is Molly with the first of the reviews for our swap. :-)

I enjoyed the first chapter of this story, so I was happy to find that you've got another one up already (as well as a new one-shot too! You're so productive!!!).

Seeing that the door just exploded I should say that Isabella's family seems to be a very cool one. I would never calm down enough to make coffee to the visitor/intruder...

The story about her father is both sad and a believable background. How horrible, though! It kind of reminds me about Dumbledore's sister, although it's really not the same after all. I can understand that he wanted to forget all about magic after that.

I can understand Rosa here. She must feel very betrayed, and also afraid here. I don't know how I would have reacted to be honest... Isabella is strong and can surely speak for herself. I love her already!

It's interesting how you've changed some details so that the Mexican system becomes different from the British one. It would be very unlikely if all magical cultures and school systems were the same. It'll be interesting to see how you're going to develop this later on!

I like how you've included the Spanish words in a way that I can understand the meaning, although I don't understand the actual words. The text is more fluent without the asterisks too!



Molly

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Review #5, by HappyMollyWeasleySerenity: Serenity

30th May 2015:
Hi Laura! This is Molly with the review for our swap.

First I have to say that this was perhaps the most heartbreaking story I've read in ages. The sad, hopeless feeling I'm left with after reading makes me want to curl up under a blanket and eat chocolate for ever... But it was also a beautiful story, or more so, it was beautifully told. The narrative tone is great, and I feel really close to Padma (who's actually a character I've never given a lot of thought.)

The language is also beautiful, they way you're describing things, and also the way you've divided the story into different parts makes the pace of the story capture me.

You've done a good job with describing the loyalties Padma is drawn between here. Her mother's expectations, her own feelings, her love for Isobel, her longing to be different from who she is...

The saddest thing, (although the ending is pretty sad too...) is that what first was exploring and loving, and what turned into a secret "not dirty, but silent" became exactly dirty and shameful through the eyes of the gossiping boys. What should be beautiful felt like a shame instead, and ruined everything.

Thanks for sharing this story with us, and thanks for swapping with me!

Molly

Author's Response: Hey Molly!

Thank you so much for your review! I really, really enjoyed swapping with you. Both of our stories caused quite the heartache, didn't they? Hehe! I'm so glad you mentioned the way I divided the piece - I was sort of tempted to write it as a short story but in the end I kept it as it is. So it's great that it worked! :D

Thanks for such a lovely review ♥

Laura xxx


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Review #6, by HappyMollyWeasleyLearn To Love Again: Stale Firewhiskey And Vomit

29th May 2015:
Hi! It's Molly with the review for our swap. :-)

I'm going to say it right from the start... I'm not a Dramione person, and I rarely chose Dramiones if I got a choice. But I know your writing is good, and I saw this story right on the top of your page, so I wanted to give it a go. It's a good thing to broaden one's horizons once in a while too... So, let's see what we've got here.

Well, imagine to wake up after a rough night, and not remembering anything, but to read about it in the paper! That wouldn't be too nice, would it? I don't envy him at all!

OMG! He's really deep into trouble this time, isn't he? I can't help but feeling sorry for him, even if it was a reckless thing to do... It's good to have a family lawyer, but it seems like Draco has been pushing him a bit too far. And, it's probably just like Finnius says, not easy to find another one. Rehab then... I bet Draco isn't fully prepared for what that will be like.

This was a good start, and I would love to read more of this. I would say that this chapter was a bit on the short side, even for a first chapter, but it was a good one which brought attention to the story.


Molly

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Review #7, by HappyMollyWeasleyCost of Redemption: Prologue

29th May 2015:
Hi! It's Molly again, reviewing for our swap.

Regulus is making a difference between killing Muggles and people of "our own". It sounds terrible, and it is terrible, but that's how war works. To make someone a soldier is to get them to forget that people are people, and to make them obey every order without thinking. Ordinary, decent people can do the most cruel things when they are ordered so. A good soldier doesn't think or feel, because when we start feeling and thinking, just like Regulus does here, we're not able to keep doing these things.

Regulus has just woken up, and it is painful to do so, I imagine. He wants to make things right again, to make up for his mistakes. But that's not an easy task.

I think you did great here! This first chapter helps us to get into Regulus mind, and to understand him. It also started in meditas res which let us feel and think right away. I suppose you've more planned out for this?


Molly

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Review #8, by HappyMollyWeasleyPending Further Investigation: xii. cross the line [or] don't say the a word

29th May 2015:
As I've already told you, I enjoy this story very much. I actually like it better than the prequel too. The characters are struggling to find a balance between acting as the adults they are, and betraying the youths they recently were. I remember being a young teacher myself when I accidentally let profanities slip out of my mouth. The embarrassment and shame was awful...

The real life Bechdel test... That was a good one! :D

The was you use Holly and Rose here is amazing. Together they show exactly what Brodie says. There is no gold star system. Rose likes sex, and she's not interested in a relationship (for the time being, or permanently. Could be either, and it really doesn't matter in my opinion.). Holly wants an emotional involvement, but she's not interested in sex. No gold stars, it's fine either way.

Teddy... I can only assume that it was a shock for Victoire, if she didn't know anything at all before. Teddy has had some time to think, but to Victoire it might have been totally new. Still, it's not an excuse to say things like that. Teddy need her to be loving and supporting.

"I'm married." "I know." Well, what else can you say...


Molly

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Review #9, by HappyMollyWeasleyPending Further Investigation: viii. reality bites [or] disillusionment, thy name is rose

29th May 2015:
Sean and Rose! I didn't see that one coming, but then again... neither did Rose, did she? I suppose she's allowed to have a bit fun, if nothing else. She totally deservers that!

Rose brewing contraception potions for her students! I like that, because it's a sign of actually caring. The rules of only giving the potion for the older students doesn't prevent the younger, but in fact endangers them instead. The Ministry is blind and old-fashioned, which you've shown on several points in this story. (Although legal age of consent varies in different parts of the world it's not unreasonable to believe that teenagers actually do need contraceptions, because that's just the way it is.)


Molly

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Review #10, by HappyMollyWeasleyPending Further Investigation: vii. sparks fly [or] things could definitely be worse

29th May 2015:
"You guys would make great parents." Oh, this almost made me cry. It's so true, and I can't help feeling utterly sorry, although I've read Serendipity already... I guess Holly felt a little stupid saying that though. It's so unfair that (male) gay couples have so slim chances for a baby. Female couples could get an insemination, legally and safe (at least where I live, I know it's not the case everywhere!), but that's obviously not an option for them. Anyway... They're still too young, and for now the puppy will do. :-/

"Holly's got a boy-frieeend!" This made me smile and giggle. I am SO rooting for this!!!


Molly

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Review #11, by HappyMollyWeasleyPending Further Investigation: vi. the rollercoaster [or] love is a battlefield

29th May 2015:
Hi again!

This story only gets better and better, and I just can't stop reading. (But I had to take a break to get back and review the chapters I've read all too fast because I was impatiently wanting more or because I was reading on my phone... So here I am!)

I love the interaction between Albus and Scorpius in this chapter. We got to see them at their best, and at their worst. Just like they are! I love how they've both grown and matured since TFWMS, but that they're still the same characters. (Not only them, but the other characters too, but they're my favourites.)

The loophole in the law is awesome! It's believable, and I'm prepared to accept this as canon. Dean and Seamus! :)

Ginny and Astoria are great, and I love the dynamics in that part of the story. I hope we'll see more of the Mums!

Molly

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Review #12, by HappyMollyWeasleyDon't Forget Me: My Hero

28th May 2015:
Hi!

It's Molly here with the review for our swap! Oh, this was angst when it is at its best! How utterly sad and terrible, how did you come up with this? Poor Albus!

There must have been a lot of background and lots of history which can't be told in 500 words, but you let us guess and think, and I'm amazed by how quickly you could draw this portrait of not only Albus, but of James, and of the rest of the family.

I can't decide if Albus is sad and loving his brother so much that he offers to take the blame for such a horrible crime, or if I'm angry with him for not standing up for himself. A bit of both, actually... Because I don't think James will ever save him.

Or, - terrible thought -, what if it's all in Albus' mind? What if he's the real killer, with a twisted mind who blames an innocent James? The more I think about this, the scarier it gets...

It's scary, and a horrible storyline, but it's a great story! Thanks for sharing this with us, and thanks for swapping with me!


Molly

Author's Response: Hey Molly!

I wanted to write a 500 word story, and all I knew was that I wanted it to be dark and next gen. Before I knew what was happening, it was about Albus in jail and James being the one who is the reason for him being there.

There is a lot more information, including why James killed Rose. But I'm thinking of making that into a short story.

Thank you so much for your kind and amazing words! I was worried that I wouldn't get much across in just 500 words, you don't realise just how many you use until you're trying to write a certain amount.

:O o that would be such a twist! And James won't save him, he'll just keep giving empty promises that he'll keep breaking. Poor Albus.

Thank you so much for swapping as well and for your amazing review! I love it so much! :D


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Review #13, by HappyMollyWeasleyI'll Go With You: I'll Go With You

28th May 2015:
Hi!

It's Molly here with the review for our swap. :)

A good thing with these review swaps is that we get to read stories we probably would have missed otherwise. I'm not a Harry/Hermione shipper, so I chances are slim that I would have read this one on my own. I tend to ship Harry/Ginny and Ron/Hermione too much to ever bother with stories which contradicts that.

I like how you included Ron and his history with Hermione here, but I would love to have a similar explanation of why Harry isn't with Ginny. Did they broke up, or did they never got together again after the war?

Your writing is good, and as I understand you've tried extra hard with your descriptions in this story. You're great at describing things, but I would say that it sometimes feels like it is a little too much, as if you've stressed it a bit, if you know what I mean?

Wow! That's what I would call a love scene...! Say no more... ;-)

I must say that I was most surprised by how this story ended. I suppose Harry wants to be young, and live life. He deseves it, but what about Hermione?

Thanks for swapping with me!

Molly

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! I'll post your review tonight.

I'm glad that this got you to read something you wouldn't normally, as getting assigned this banner made me write something I wouldn't normally! I'm not a shipper and actually really dislike writing major characters, so this was a challenge for me on many levels.

It's good feedback that sometimes I pushed the descriptions a bit to far. I suppose that for the purpose of this exercise it's better than not far enough, but it's obviously something I'll need to keep working on.

I also tried really hard to "show, not tell," for this story, so I really didn't want to spell out Harry's emotional state, but hoped that it would show through in his words and actions. I felt the need to give a nod to the fact that Ron and Hermione weren't together, but I hoped that Harry's emotional impotence would be explanation enough for why he wasn't with Ginny. And by connection, why he did not feel obligated to stick around for Hermione.

Haha, I'm glad that the love scene made an impact. That was another new thing for this story - I've never written anything more in depth than a brief reference, so I'm glad that my first attempt was powerful.

Based on your review, it seems that I did not accomplish everything that I had hoped with this story, but I really did approach it as a writing exercise, so that's okay. Your feedback was definitely helpful and gave me things to work on.

Thanks for the swap!


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Review #14, by HappyMollyWeasleyCygnus Black III and His Three Daughters: Frustrated Morning

28th May 2015:
Hi Kenny!

It's Molly with the review for our swap. :) You've been so productive lately, how do you have the time for all this writing?

I like the start of this story. Harry and Ginny don't care too much about what Ginny's mother would think, and I suppose that's just like most teenagers would do. The transition from the start of the story, to the story of the Blacks works fine too.

The history about the Black family is interesting. I've been thinking about writing about the Black sisters myself, but I haven't yet. The differences between the three sisters are so many, and so important. Maybe Bellatrix was cruel just from the beginning, as you write her here, or maybe something happened to her when she was growing up...?

If I could give you one piece of advise on this story it is that I feel that it's too much information for such a short text. I get a little overwhelmed and confused by it, and I have to read slowly to take it all in. But the story itself is good, and I like how you included a lot of characters, like the Longbottoms. You certainly got material for a longer story if you wanted to elaborate this.

Thanks for swapping with me!

Molly

Author's Response: Thank you Molly for stopping by. Yeah, I'm in the mood for writing, :) thanks to the forums, the story challenge!

You got to the right point. I'm wondering whether I should add more chapters for this. The first chapter is like a summary. Maybe I'll add more chapters from the point of each child of Cygnus Black later.

I'm eager to read your Black sisters story. I reckon you can 'cause you're bringing up your children, so from your experience, you can write more interesting one.

Kenny


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Review #15, by HappyMollyWeasleyIvy Manor: Ivy Manor

28th May 2015:
Hi Kenny!

I like how this story turned out! You've really done a great work here. It was also fun to try to beta read it for you, thanks for giving me that opportunity.

I like the thought of Harry trying to mend old wounds by visiting places and remebering things from his years of fighting Dumbledore. I can imagine him doing it a lot after the war, as a part of his healing process. There's a reason for the epilogue to be so much later than the story I suppose. Harry might very well need those nineteen years to heal and to feel happy again. Visiting Frank Bryce's grave was perhaps one of those things.

Molly

Author's Response: Yeah, Molly, your beta helped me a lot. The process was enjoyable. This one-shot is like a co-operated work. :)

You have a great insight for this. Yeah,this trip with Ginny was a healing process for Harry. I thought of the idea to let Harry visit the place where Frank Bryce was murdered by Voldemort ,which is a lament for the brave muggle.


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Review #16, by HappyMollyWeasleyFind My Way: Ignorant

27th May 2015:
Friends! Friends? Friends... Well, I suppose that'll do. For now, that is. I'll settle with them being friends, for now.

But, actually, Julie, this was an amazing chapter! This was exactly what I needed to read, and I totally enjoy the tingling feeling in my body and the butterflies in my stomach. I love scenes like the one in the library when Scorpius' feelings are out in the open, but we don't know yet what Albus' answer will be. You really made that scene almost unbearable long (But you won't hear me complaining on this!), Madam Pince was perfect!

Albus and Scorpius have very different support (or lack of support) from their families. The way Scorpius thinks about Albus' story of his parents' rainbow sweets is sad. Every kid should get rainbow sweets from their family when they're coming out... But then, Albus makes me sad too. He is seriously thinking that nobody would fancy him, just because he's blind... Poor boy.

I love every chapter of this, and I'm sorry that I'm just fangirling, because I simply can't find anything critical to say about this story.

Molly, the fangirl ;-)

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Review #17, by HappyMollyWeasleyPending Further Investigation: v. the proverbial boot [or] the only way is up

27th May 2015:
Oh Lester! You've really got a mess to deal with now... You need to swallow your pride and ask for help... Everybody need a little help sometimes, you know!

Lester has always been the one of your characters I haven't been able to relate to as well as the other ones int TFWMS, but he really gets me here. Poor thing, to be so brooke, and yet so proud, and to be struggling this much.

And Albus, Albus... He's just awesome here. Very much in fact as he is (much later of course!) when he's determined to adopt his boys in your recent story. He knows what he wants, he doesn't hesitate, and he does what must be done. I simply love him. (I would have married him, if he isn't already marrying Scorpius...)

Molly, the fangirl. ;)

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Review #18, by HappyMollyWeasleyAfter: One.

25th May 2015:
Happy Birthday!

I thought I would leave you a review to wish you a happy birthday. (But I'm not sure why I picked such a sad story for a birthday review...? Strange choice, I'm sorry about that!)

I love this story. It's so sad, and you told it so well. I think Dumbledore said the most stupid thing here. "Time heals all pain." I don't think it's true at all, just like Amos says. It changes though.

I think that you covered a lot in this short one-shot. We got to know what happened to Cedric's parents, and how different they reacted. I like how you don't bring any happy ending or smooth soloutions here, but leaves us with their grief and their misery.

The one thing I would like to add though, is a longer perspective. Six months is a very short time in the process of grieving a loved one, and even more when it comes to your child. I would have loved to get a glimpse on Amos' life six years, or even sixty years later...

I'm ususally not very fond of stories told in second person, but you did it very well. I had read half of the story before I even noticed it, so I suppose you made it work!

Thanks for sharing this story with us, and once again, Happy Birthday!


Molly

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Review #19, by HappyMollyWeasleyL'optimisme: Prussia

24th May 2015:
Happy birthday!

I thought I should leave you a short birthday review tonight, along with my best wishes of a happy birthday to you!

Gellert is surely aware of himself, proud, and confident, despite everything that has happened. I suppose that the similarities between him and Albus as youngsters are replaced with differences as they grow older. I can't stop wondering what would have happened if it wasn't for Ariana... Who would have the most influence over whom?

"You do not need to answer; I know whatever you say will be a lie." Well, Gellert sums it up here, doesn't he? He has no faith, no true believe in humanity. And that makes him so different from Albus. And although my heart was broken for Albus' sake in your last chapter, it's nothing like how I pity Gellert.


Molly

Author's Response: Hi there, Molly - thank you so much for stopping by! :) And thank you! :) :) I really, really didn't expect anything, so this was such a great surprise present! :D

Yeah, Gellert is very confident, definitely about himself. He's one of those people who just knows himself so well, and his knows his own abilities and limits, so he's really able to maximise them perfectly, you know? Similarities, I think, sometimes seem closer because of situations, but they're actually not so close - so it's kinda what happened with them: they seemed almost identical, but then they're not, and that sort of become more obvious later on, for sure. Influence - tbh, I think if Ariana hadn't died it could have gone either way. Albus isn't a total pushover, after all, even for Gellert ;)

Yeah, Gellert has a really different view on humanity in general from Albus, and it is kinda sad, though it's also a little bit patronising. He just doesn't see people as capable of managing themselves. He sees things in terms of danger, which is, imo, a very sad and difficult way to live life. Albus is definitely a lot more hopeful and positive. In that, I think they do balance each other out quite well :)

Thank you so so much for the review - and for the birthday wishes! I'm just so happy you're still enjoying this! :)

Aph xx


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Review #20, by HappyMollyWeasleyLetters to loving you: [one]

24th May 2015:
Hi Anja! Thanks for swapping with me! :)

This was an interesting start! I'm not a fan of Draco, so I seldom read Draco centred stories, but I kind of like his voice here. I suppose he has done a few bad choices, or maybe his parents chose for him... But he's not a bad person. We only saw him through Harry's eyes in the books, and we never knew the good sides of him.

If you don't mind me being a bit critical here (and I hope you don't, because you know I love your writing!), I think this chapter moves on a bit too fast. It starts good with the trial, but the part when Draco and Harry feels rushed. I think it would take a lot more time before they started to like each other after seven years of dislike.

I love the way Harry defends Draco and Narcissa. He does it out of the goodness of his heart, nobody asks him to, but he does it anyway. (But I don't think he would ever refer to Dumbledore as Albus though!)

What an interesting choice with a Muggle hospital! It must be so confusing and scaring to Draco! He will have quite a hard time adjusting to that I suppose...!


Molly

Author's Response: Hi Molly :)
I'd love to have a big UNDER CONSTRUCTION sign on this whole story. I'm really not too happy with the chapter the way it is right now. My amazing beta (whom I can never thank enough for her incredible work with this chapter alone) and I are working on it.
In the first round of editing, I added over 800 words to this... so I'd guess that there's more detail coming soon.

I think Harry would definitely defend Draco and Narcissa. He always wanted justice, and both Draco and Narcissa haven't done all that they are tried for.

I thought Draco needed a HUGE change of scenery here. a Muggle hospital opens up a completely new perspective for him. (I have to admit that the risks of this arrangement never really occured to me until a reviewer pointed it out - a former Death Eater in a place where Muggles are at their most vulnerable... may not be such a great idea in general, but I love Draco and I know he wouldn't hurt anyone...)

Thanks again for the swap

~Anja


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Review #21, by HappyMollyWeasleyOnce More: Once More

24th May 2015:
Hi Andrew!

It's Molly here starting to review the entries of the Addicted to Albus and Scorpius challenge. You're efficient! One entry for four challenges! Amazing! :)

I like how this starts like an ordinary Scorose, but transfers into a good Scorbus, and then into a tragedy. It was most unexpected, to say the least. The mood of the story transforms in the same way, which is necessary of course due to the circumstances.

Rose doesn't seem worth his affection here, and I'm glad he had the guts to move on from her. It must be most confusing to find out that he has romantic feelings towards his friend instead. He's not wrong in assuming that he's going to meet prejudice from the world too, but he still follow his heart.

Scorpius draws the conclusion that he is attracted to a person, not to a specific gender. I suppose that is the truth for many people. Just because you're heterosexual, or bisexual or homosexual or whatever, you're not attracted to each and every individual you come across...

The scene with the Hippogriffs is great, I kind of wish that scene was longer... And then the dragon. They're both very brave, and I love how they both express their love for each other. And the sad, beautiful end. You certainly did a great job in writing an angsty love story!

But it's also a kind of rushed here in my opinion. If I got to decide I would choose to prolong the story and to divide it into maybe three or four chapters. As it is now it covers so much, and the feeling of it is therefor a bit rushed. I think it would do the story more justice that way. Don't get me wrong, it's a great story as it is, but if I could wish for more, you know... ;)

Thanks for sharing this story with us all, and for participating in our challenge too!

Molly

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Review #22, by HappyMollyWeasleySerendipity: Serendipity

24th May 2015:
Lisa! This was amazing! How can you possible put so much emotions and so much information in such a short one-shot without making it seem crowded or rushed? I'm impressed with your ability to write things like this!

I love the older Albus and Scorpius. They're so mature and secure now, and they make a difference in the world. I don't think I've ever read a fanfiction in this kind of setting before, but it's great. It breaks my heart that you chose the war in Syria... Do you think it'll still be war there in 2033, or is it a new war? I can't imagine how terrible it is for the people.

I like how the Muggle world and the wizarding world co-exists here. And the fact that the boys are wizards too is convenient (maybe a little bit too convenient if I should be l a little critical.?) Their aunts response to the fact that Albus and Scorpius are married and that they're wizards is wonderful though! (I love it, don't believe anything else!)

My favourite part of this story must be Scorpius' "Yes" when Albus says that she has asked them to adopt the children. There's no hint of hesitation, which could be considered thoughtless, but we know him better than so. I imagine that thought has crossed his mind before.

The paperwork... It's believable, and Albus is truly amazing here. He's intelligent, strong and determined. I love him! And then naming them Malfoy. It's no wonder Scorpius loves him too!


Molly

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Review #23, by HappyMollyWeasleyOnly a Dream: Only a Dream

23rd May 2015:
Hi Kat! It's Molly with the review for our swap. :)

This is a sweet little story, both sad and cute. Poor Harry, he had a rough childhood. Imagine being five and so alone and abandoned. They're neglecting him, and it breaks my heart.

You did a great job in telling this from a child's POV. The use of exclaimations marks added to that "childish" tone of narration, but I would suggest to use a little less of those anyway. They sort of draws the attention from the meaning of the story, if you know what I mean?

Another thing I would suggest to you (but this is totally up to you, you're the author here!) is to skip the very last paragraph. We all know that he's going to be saved when he's eleven, so the story would (in my opinion) be just as good, but stronger, if you ended it with "He was to old to cry." (without the exclaimation mark.)

You did an awesome job on letting us feel and think about a five-year-old Harry, and I'm glad I got to read this!


Molly

Author's Response: Thanks for the swap, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

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Review #24, by HappyMollyWeasleyA Magical Christmas.: A Magical Christmas.

23rd May 2015:
Hi! This is Molly with the review for our swap! It's never too early to get into the Christmas spirit...?

I think this is a well-written and nice story, and I can tell that you're a talented writer. The writing seems effortless and natural, and I really like how you told this story.

Christmas is a hard time for neglected children. I suppose everyday is hard for them, but times like Christmas when everybody else is excited and happy must be extra difficult. Those children don't appreciate the break from school either, because it means more time at home with a dysfunctional family. Angie has the option to stay at Hogwarts, but she's feeling guilty about leaving her younger siblings too.

I like that you included her thoughts about breaking the norm by being different from other children. And, as you pointed out, it's not mainly about class or money, but about the neglect. It's one thing to be poor and another thing to be living in misery.

I love Professor Blackburn here. It's great that Angie has someone who sees her, and who understands. My guess is that Professor Blackburn understands a lot more than she says. It's good to se that the staff cares about the students. They are so young and vulnerable after all. (I can't imagine sending my eleven-year-old to a boarding school!)

The snowball fight, Hagrid and the thestrals were wonderful, as well as the Christmas dinner. There's hope in this story, even though it's sad. Angie has a future, and she has the same chance as anybody else now.

Thanks for swapping with me!


Molly

Author's Response: Thank you so, so much for this review. I'm really glad you liked it.

Yeah, I'd imagine Christmas must be difficult for children like Angie who see everybody else getting better gifts than them and apparently having a better time than them. And of course, they worry about their parents and younger siblings and so on.

And yes, I wanted to make it clear that the issues here are not caused by poverty. I grew up in Ireland during the last recession, with close to 20% unemployment, so I'm well aware that being unemployed or not having a lot of money doesn't make somebody a bad parent. Angie's mother clearly has a lot of issues and while the family's poverty may contribute to the stress she's under, the cause-effect is mainly in the other way; the things that make her unable to parent properly (her addictions, irresponsibility, etc) also contribute to her lack of money.

And yeah, this is a spin-off from my next gen series and there is more about Blackburn's life in other stories. Her background is very different from Angie's, certainly economically, but she does have her own problems and is sort of a lonely person in her own way.

And YES, I really can't imagine sending an eleven year old to boarding school. Then again, I live in a culture where leaving home may be a little less popular than in others - possibly because of 150 years of emigration and the whole idea of "the American wake" and so on. Irish college (university) students tend to go home every weekend and even then, I knew a lot of people who struggled with leaving home and they were 17/18.

And yes, Angie is a fairly positive character, despite her problems.

Thanks for the swap and thanks again for the review.


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Review #25, by HappyMollyWeasleyBreathe: iv. Mistake

22nd May 2015:
Hi Kayla! I'm here with the review for our swap. I don't know how I suddenly have missed so many chapters of this story...? I added it to my favourites now to be sure of not missing it in the future.

This review kind of covers two chapters, because I couldn't help myself from continuing reading... Poor Sirius, his family is not good for him. I suppose one could argue that he's a moody teenager too, but there is more to it than that really. They're treating him badly, and I suppose that experience might have been contributing on how well he understood Harry later in life.

So... A party at Malfoy Manor... Sirius was sure surprised by the events in this chapter. As was Regulus, I suppose... ;) Frederic isn't a shy person, now is he? But I like him, and I suppose some kissing could be good for Sirius too. (Or will it be worth it? Regulus won't be kind to him after this!) But, as Sirius discovers, a kiss from a random person whom you're not especially attracted to, is just a kiss. It's physical, with no deeper feelings behind it. (As far as I remember... It must have been almost twenty years since I last kissed somebody other than my husband...)

This is a great story, and I'm glad that you share it with us! Thanks for swapping with me!

Molly

Author's Response: Hey Molly! I'm going to do my review for our swap ASAP :D

There is definitely more going on with Sirius' family than him just being a moody teenager - although that does sometimes exacerbate the situation! Remember, the Blacks are Pureblood Voldemort supporters and Sirius is a "Blood Traitor".

Yes, there were some very surprising events in this chapter ;) I don't really like Frederic, but he's pretty open to interpretation.

I'm so glad you're enjoying this!

-Kayla


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