Reading Reviews From Member: ohmymerlin
  
727 Reviews Found

Review #51, by ohmymerlinAlbus Potter and Slytherin's Office: Tears and Laughter

4th December 2014:
I THOUGHT I REVIEWED THIS CHAPTER WOT

BUT OH MY GOODNESS CONGRATULATIONS ON COMPLETING THE STORY! I AM SO GLAD I WAS YOUR SECRET SANTA, I WOULD HAVE NEVER FOUND THIS OTHERWISE!!

Absolutely brilliant story! I also really liked the theory of Slytherin being weak magically! That was very clever! :D

And omg David is hilarious, absolutely love that guy, haha!

Amazing story! Amazing author! I'm interested to see the sequel! :)

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: Hooray! It is done! *cheers* *throws up fireworks*

I have no idea where the "magic weak" thing came from... it just popped in my head. Or maybe I'm just naturally clever. :)

David is awesome. He's a cool guy.

The first chapter of the sequel is popping into the queue today! Check back in a few days.

Thanks for the review!!


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Review #52, by ohmymerlinStuck in the Middle: Full Circle

4th December 2014:
*wipes hand on forehead* pHEW THEY ARE OKAY AND CUTE AND TOGETHER

MORE JAMES AND OLIVER?!?!?! DOES THAT MEAN SEQUEL?!?! :D

But omg, I know this story has been ended for a while now but I can't believe it's over! It's such a fantastic story! I absolutely loved it, you wrote it so phenomenally, and I loved every bit of it! Congrats on finishing it!!

Absolutely loved the ending, you did it so perfectly and I just loved everything about this ♥

10/10

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: YES! OF COURSE THEY ARE OKAY!

I would never lie about a sequel.

I'm so glad you liked it. I admit, it became one of my all time favorite things. I miss them. I need to write the sequel. *looks at all the things that need to be finished first*

Thank you so much for leaving a review!

Sam.


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Review #53, by ohmymerlinStuck in the Middle: Let Me Go

4th December 2014:
WHOOP THERE IT IS

*in the Chandler voice* I KNEW IT!!

But :((( y u do dis sam

And I can see Oliver's reasoning for being so mad but I don't agree with it! Can't he just see that James would never actually mean that?! He's being just a /tad/ overdramatic!

James was just trying to keep his wish but :(((

Okay, I'm just going to read the next chapter because surely you're not going to leave them not talking?!?!?!

10/10, once again! ♥

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: OMG, I DID THE CHANDLER VOICE, TOO!!!

Because it must be done.

He's not mad at James. Not enough to be dramatic. He's mad at himself for putting James in that position and just wants to blame someone else for a while. Once he's alone, he'll calm down and blame himself and try and fix it... with help. ;)

Surely, I would never. :P

Thank you so much for leaving a review!

Sam.


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Review #54, by ohmymerlinStuck in the Middle: Overcoming Demons

4th December 2014:
Oh, phew nothing bad happened yet. But there's still two more chapters and I know you, Sam. *suspicious eyes*

But naw, they said 'I love you'!!! HOW CUTE!

And Oliver has a chance to stay in England FOREVERRR

he and James in a very adorable relationship that will last forever and ever :P

And omg, Oliver's dad talking about James' specific body parts made me crack up, hahaha! Absolutely loved it!!

Anyway, another brilliant chapter, Sam! You're such a talented writer!! ♥

10/10

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: You know me so well...

Of course, they said I love you. It was time. And Oliver might just stay (as in, yes he will)...

Will it, though? Will it really? ;)

I love Oliver's dad.

Thank you so much for leaving a review!

Sam.


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Review #55, by ohmymerlinStuck in the Middle: Closer

4th December 2014:
OOH TUCKER AND SARAH, TUCKER AND SARAH

hahaha I really loved the way you described the way they were sitting in the potions class -- I have no idea why I liked it so much but I did :P

This was such a lovely and sweet chapter! I don't want to read on because I know something bad will happen BECAUSE YOU DON'T LIKE US BEING HAPPY DO YOU?! :P

but we all still love you and your fantastic writing! ♥

10/10

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: Tucker and Sarah are something.

It's been a while. I'll have to read back, but I'm glad you like it. :)

Haha, I know how you feel. I write it, but I never wanna read it. :D

Thank you so much for leaving a review!

Sam.


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Review #56, by ohmymerlinStuck in the Middle: Ready

4th December 2014:
ooohhh~~~ things r getting seriousss ;)))

(no wine, just over tired :P)

I love how much James loves Oliver :') It's so sweet and you write their relationship so well! It's a bit sad though that they're still hiding their relationship. JUST BE OUT IN THE OPEN AND BE HAPPY

But I totally understand the reasoning behind it, it's so real and believable but I'm not a person that hides many things so I JUST WANT THEM TO BE OPEN AND RELAXED AND FREE but I guess it isn't me and they are just fictional characters :P

Love the chapter, again! 10/10 ♥

Author's Response: Things always get serious when I write. ;)

Yeah, James loves Oliver very much. Would do anything for him, even keep quiet. Silly boys.

Fictional? Who's fictional? THEY ARE REAL, I TELL YOU! *cough* I'm glad you find their relationship believeable. :P

Thank you so much for leaving a review!

Sam.


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Review #57, by ohmymerlinStuck in the Middle: The Birthday of All Birthdays

4th December 2014:
EEEK

THEY'RE SO CUTE AWWW

I WAS READING IT AND I LITERALLY MADE WEIRD NOISES AND MY BROTHER LOOKED AT ME STRANGELY BUT SO WORTH IT

THEY'RE SO SO SO CUTE

AND THEY'RE FINALLY TOGETHER AWWW

YAY YAY YAY YAY

Also, loved the part where Al and James had a little chat -- I LOVE strong sibling relationships, and I like that although it did seem a tiny bit awkward (mainly because James had just been snogging Oliver and he's coming out for the first time), it was still super sweet :')

LOVED this chapter, Sam! Absolutely loved it!

And of course, 10/10 :D

Author's Response: Haha! It definitely sounds like it was worth it. JAMES AND OLIVER WILL ALWAYS BE WORTH IT!!!

Finally!

James is usually too open with everyone, so he doesn't find talking about his feelings as awkward as Albus does, only what he was doing just before. Albus, however, doesn't like telling his family anything. :P

Thank you so much for leaving a review!

Sam.


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Review #58, by ohmymerlinStuck in the Middle: Tell Him

3rd December 2014:
[heavy breathing]

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

FIRST OF ALL, I HATE MELANIE UGH SHE'S SO ANNOYING AND TERRIBLE

SECOND OF ALL, OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

THEY'RE A COUPLE NOW

THEY'RE COUPLEY AND CUTE

OH MY GOD

I LOVE IT

AHHH NO WORDS EXCEPT OH MY GOD, AHHH AND FINALLY!!!

LOVED, LOVED THIS CHAPTER, SAM!!!

10/10 OF COURSEEE ♥ ♥

(also happy birthday! :P I was going to try and review them all on your birthday but it's nearly 1 am here and I have to work tomorrow haha but I will be returning ;))

Author's Response: That was a lot of oh my gods. Totally justified, I know. THEY ARE FINALLY TOGETHER!!!

Melanie is just a big, jealous meanie. :P

Thank you so much for leaving a review!

Sam.

P.S. I know this is very late, but thank you for the birthday messages! :D


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Review #59, by ohmymerlinStuck in the Middle: Lakeside Encounters

3rd December 2014:
you're pure evil Sam. I would use your full name if I knew it just to make sure you know you're 100% evil. Get everyone excited about the chapter thingy and then being like LOL NOPE SUCKS 2 B U

But oh my god James (and Oliver) just BLURT YOUR LOVE OUT FOR EACH OTHER IT IS GETTING RIDICULOUS NOW

Although this chapter was a bit (VERY/EXTREMELY) frustrating, it was still fabulous, as you are ;)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

10/10 ♥

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: Evil Sam. It's just a known fact now. No one is surprised. They read something of mine and they're just like, that evil [probably ends with a naughty word or two]. :P

I was not thinking SUCKS TO BE YOU, though. I was just cackling. ;)

I know right! Silly boys!

Thank you so much for leaving a review!

Sam.


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Review #60, by ohmymerlinStuck in the Middle: Letting Things Out

3rd December 2014:
JAMES JUST GET OLLIE AND SNOG HIS FACE OFF DON'T GIVE ME A PATHETIC CHEEK KISS PLS

Mmm I loved the description of Theo. It was definitely very descriptive and even though I can't technically see him, he was definitely eye candy ;)

JAMES AND OLIVER, JAMES AND OLIVER THEY'RE SO CUTE I LOVE THEM

(okay I've had a couple of wines so I might not be making that much sense, hehehE)

But you say James is getting bolder but Oliver is totally getting way more bolder than him! He FLIRTED WITH A WINK :P hahaha onto the enxt chapter!!

10/10, of course!! ♥

ALSO HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Author's Response: YEAH, JAMES, DO AS KAYLA SAYS. GOD.

Oh, he is. It was my favorite part of that chapter, I won't lie. And I have one word for you, my friend: SEQUEL. ;)

They're both getting bold. Maybe it will continue...

Thank you so much for leaving a review!

Sam.


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Review #61, by ohmymerlinStuck in the Middle: Care to Make a Wager

3rd December 2014:
SAM IT'S TAKEN ME SO LONG TO REVIEW BUT I AM FINALLY HERE

THANK YOU SOOO MUCH FOR THE AWKWARD POST-SHOWER GLIMPSE

I absolutely loved it but OF COURSE you had to make it all mysterious and curious ;) So glad you put it in though :P

LOVED how Harry was totally warning Oliver. And that he and Ginny bet on their son with alcohol and chocolate :P

Loved this chapter so much ♥ Soz for taking so long hahaha

ALSO HAPPY BIRTHDAY :D :D

10/10

Author's Response: HEY!!!

ANYTHING FOR YOU! WHO DOESNT LOVE A POST-SHOWER GLIMPSE!

Everything is mysterious and curious. I'm a mysterious and curious person.

Harry is just awesome. And more intuitive than people give him credit for. You'd think they'd learn, but no.

Thank you so much for leaving a review!

Sam.


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Review #62, by ohmymerlinMiddle Clouds: Cold War

2nd December 2014:
Hello! Sorry for the massive delay in getting the review to you (OVER TWO MONTHS, I AM SO SORRY D':) but I'm finally here!

So first of all, loved the chapter! I thought it was really well done! I really liked it and I love your style of writing. I don't know what it is, but I really liked the way you write.

However, from what you've described Rose as (a little bland but overall an extremely sweet person; I love her characterisation) I feel like her and Malfoy wouldn't have had a massive blow up, you know? I feel like she'd just kind of hide in the shadows and if he did things to her she wouldn't react and he'd eventually just get bored with it. But that's just my opinion.

Also, I LOVED your descriptions in this! You wrote them spectacularly.

Loved Rose and Ruth's friendship! And oooh something is totally going to happen between Al and Ruth, ehehehehe ;)

And oh god, I laughed so hard when Rose said she talks to Neville :P I like her quiet sense of humour, haha!

I kind of feel bad for Jonathan. Rose doesn't really properly ~feel~ anything for him, and it's one thing to like a person but you need that spark and I can totally tell she doesn't have that spark.

Anyway, loved the chapter! Feel free to request again!

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: Hey Kayla!

Don't worry about it, dear, I understand! I have a review thread myself and I know that sometimes RL can get in the way of reviewing, which is perfectly acceptable. I still appreciate you leaving this review, thank you!

And the timing is just perfect, actually, because with time I've somehow lost interest in this story and this lovely review has reminded me of why I love writing it so much. And it's so great to hear that you like my style, especially regarding the descriptions! I'm quite fond of descriptive prose, I can't lie. And I'm glad parts of it made you laugh, that is always a huge compliment in my books! :)

As for Rose, you make a great point! God, yes, it's quite obvious now. I planned on revising these first few chapters so it's great to hear honest opinions about it - it will really help me flesh out my characters more. The thing with this chapter is that I mainly used Rose as a spectator of the world around her and so her personality kind of got lost in it all, I think. I do like your analysis of her - bland and sweet, that's exactly what I was aiming for at first, but I hope some of her temperament will show in later chapters. The nature of their fight is a bit more clarified in the next chapter (which I will request a review for, because I'd really like your opinion on this) and I hope it explains that the argument wasn't really as huge as Rose imagined it was. However, I will definitely add some more characterisation to her in this first chapter, just to make it clear that she /would/ fight back if provoked. Your opinion is totally valid and I am very grateful you shared it with me! Feel free to do so for anything else you found weird! :)

Yay for Rose and Ruth! I love writing them, though they will have problems of their own. Aah, I can't say anything about Al and Ruth! But I'm sometimes guilty of toying with my readers! *hides* Haha, I'll say nothing more.

Ah, yes, Jonathan. Very good analysis! I really wanted to try portraying a relationship that is very bland and uninteresting, just because there's plenty of relationships like that in real life.

Thank you so much for this review, Kayla! I'm glad you liked it and I'm very glad you gave me CC, I truly appreciate it! :)

Andy


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Review #63, by ohmymerlinA Blossoming Romance: Bridesmaids, Best Men And Sober Kisses

2nd December 2014:
Hey, Sophie! Sorry for the crazy delay on this! But I'm finally here! :D

First of all, OH MY GOODNESS CHLOE AND LORCAN GOT MARRIED! And Al and Alyssa kissed whilst sober! DEVELOPMENTTT~~~ :P

Okay, I've picked up a few things so I've written it all down below.

In fact I've avoided the Potter household all together and the blind on my window has been kept firmly shut much to Chloe's protests of letting the sunlight in.

In fact, I've avoided the Potter household all together and the blind on my window has been kept firmly shut, much to Chloe's protests of not letting the sunlight in. -- you just said that the sunlight was being let in but if the blind was shut/down, it would block it out, haha :P

But more than that, today's the fateful date in my baby sister is getting married.

But more than that, today is the fateful day that my baby sister gets married. -- I just liked the way the latter sounded. The first sentence seemed very awkward and didn't roll on my tongue nicely.

Normally I'm used to be up and going to bed at weird times but getting up at five to travel into central London to the hotel was a bit far fetched in my opinion.

Normally, I'm used to waking up and going to bed at weird times but getting up at five to travel into central London to the hotel was a bit far fetched in my opinion. -- I just fixed it a little bit because it sounded a bit clunky

Our fluffy white cat Snowflake looking miffed as she meowed at Chloe who promptly fed her the ham.

Our fluffy, white cat, Snowflake, looked miffed as she meowed at Chloe who promptly fed her the hame. -- LOVED this sentence! Loved it all, you just had to add a few commas and changed 'looking' to 'look'

I am really not a morning person.

I was really not a morning person -- need to keep this in past tense to align it with the rest of the story.

This was one of the reasons I love my mother so very much

This was one of the reasons I loved my mother so very much -- just needed to add a 'd' to the end of love ;)

My yellow bug was on the drive

My yellow bug was on the driveway -- just left out 'way' here, unless in England you guys just call it a drive, so then ignore me!

I was looking forward to just get to this hotel and sleep.

I was looking forward to just getting to this hotel and having a sleep. -- just fixed it up a little bit so it would flow nicely

Also, you said Chloe was going shopping at seven, and then returning before ten to have breakfast, but if they left the house at six, by the time they would have gotten there (including the time from when they got lost) it would be about seven, so Alyssa would practically have a ten minute sleep. Which is a little useless :P Maybe make it for eight, as most shops don't even open at seven anyway ;)

Which is always a plus!

Which was always a plus! -- Again, you need to keep the past tense so it matches with all your story. You've got a few sentences in which you do this, so you might want to focus on that?

making sure that me thoughts were not about to come true.

making sure my thoughts were not about to come true -- just a lil typo here!

We've arrived. Al x

Okay, the only thing that bothered me here was the 'x' Al put at the end of his text. I've got quite a few guy friends and relatives, and not once have I ever seen them put little kisses at the ends of texts. Even when the guy likes the girl, I don't think he does it. I also don't think he does it when he has a girlfriend but I've never seen my guy friends/relatives text their girlfriend, except for my brother who doesn't do it either. It's just a tiny nitpicky thing but I thought I should let you know :)

I swear one of the guys muttered, 'She looks hot," as I past him

As I walked past, I could have sworn one of the guys muttered, "She looks hot." -- again, just reaaranging the words to make it sound nicer

I was breathing heavy as I loosened my arms

I was breathing heavily as I loosened my arms -- this just makes it flow a little better

Seriously though, aside from those above things, you've improved so much. This was a really well done chapter!

You asked if the pacing was fast, and admittedly, it did feel a bit fast and choppy when they were getting ready for the wedding -- it would have been great to slow that down a bit but it didn't really matter too much. I mean, I've never been IN a wedding (attended a few, though) and it seems like it would just be a day where everything goes by really quickly so, it could have been worse!

In terms of detailing, I think maybe you could go more in depth with Alyssa's emotions. Especially with the guilt she's having by lying to her family about Chloe's wedding. You describe them very well, but I think you could dig a little deeper! I BELIEVE IN YOU :D

Definitely seemed real, yes!

Characterisation was excellent!

So overall, this was a fantastic chapter, Sophie! You've done super well on it! Sorry about the delay. I didn't realise it'd been over two months :O

Feel free to request again!

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: Kayla, hi!

It's finally, I honestly forgot I even requested haha so it was a nice surprise :)

I KNOW! haha, first Chloe and Lorcan, then Alyssa and Al, love is in the air :p

YOU ARE LITERALLY A STAR! I've gone over and edited the little things as well as other changes/things I added in. As for the Al putting and x it's probably because I do it all the time with my friends, it's a habit I guess which sneaked in :p But you are right. The 'drive V's driveway' thing. Technically it is a called a driveway but I always think of those big fancy houses with those long driveway's that lead up, so I call it a drive, it might just be a thing from where I'm from.

I was a bridesmaid for my brother a few years ago and it was crazy! Literally the morning/getting ready goes so fast. I definitely think there were bits which did move faster than normal, but its normal (I think?).

Alyssa's emotions, ahh so many different ones. I've been so tired lately I haven't been writing but I most probably will go back over the chapter and add to them. THANK YOU :D

I've said it before, but you are a star and you deserve a medal (again) ♥

-Sophie ♥



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Review #64, by ohmymerlinThe Wrinkles of the Road: Scorpius. --- An Unpleasant Revelation.

25th September 2014:
Ooh GO SCORPIUS YOU SHOW THEM!

I really loved how at the start he was thinking "I'm going to be super respectful" but by the end he was like "nup no more I am an adult and need respect"

I'm glad he said that. Hermione and Ron needed to hear it!

But oh no, her fertility might be affected :( And oh god I hope it doesn't kill her!

It's going to be interesting when Rose wakes up though. I'm excited to read that chapter!

Anyway, this was another flawless chapter! Absolutely loved reading from Scorpius' POV!

10/10 :D

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: Haha, yeah, poor Scorpius - he wanted to be respectful, really, he did, but... well... parents don't necessarily make it easy, do they?

I'm glad that you liked Scorpius's POV. Thank you so much for the review!


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Review #65, by ohmymerlinThe Wrinkles of the Road: Rose. --- Danger Behind Every Corner.

25th September 2014:
Hmmm... where do you think the impulsivity comes from? I wonder which gene has that impulse... I really wonder :P

OH MY GOD ROSE PLS THINK BEFORE YOU DO

I am so worried about her right now!

But seriously, I really really LOVE the way and style of your writing. There's just something about it I can't get enough of! I really love it. I just love all your descriptions and dialogue, especially the dialogue. It feels so real and natural and never feels awkward or clunky. Absolutely love it!

Anyway, I'm off to read the next chapter! I hope Rose is okay!

10/10

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: Yeahhh, that's Rose. I'm glad this comes off so well - I love this story, but I always get tense about my writing, so hearing that it works is wonderful. ♥

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Review #66, by ohmymerlinDecoding the Tutshill Tornados: The One with the Burnt Pie

25th September 2014:
omg

no

why do u hate us

do u not like ur characters 2 b hapi

look uve made me typ like we did when msn was still around omg

no

i cannot believe dis

JAMES GO GET SOME ALLERGY MEDICINE FOR GOODNESS SAKE YOU LITERALLY RISKED YOUR LIFE BECAUSE YOU SNEEZED

Shame on you!

But seriously? That was the best they could come up with? Quidditch isn't THAT serious. As if someone would risk killing their family just for a captaincy. Captaincy is temporary. Family is 5eva (dat mean moar dan 4eva)

I do like how he called out TomCat's name just in case he would respond :P

I also enjoyed how he entered the room. Maybe I should do that next time I do something incredibly stupid (so maybe 2-3 working days? Please allow time for postage)

Ack! Absolutely cannot wait to read the next chapter!!! I can really imagine Lily being extremely snarky to the capturers though. She'd probably just sigh and roll her eyes at the dramatics and ask if she can get back to her popcorn, haha :P

10/10 of course!!!

- Kayla :)

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Review #67, by ohmymerlinDecoding the Tutshill Tornados: The One with the Breaking News

25th September 2014:
Hello again!

Haha, I absolutely loved that little addition where James said Ginny told him Harry was very moody in Hogwarts. DEFINITELY true! :P

AMY IS OKAY OH THANK GOODNESS

AND NAW THAT LIL SPEECH FRED MADE HE'S SUCH A CUTIE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

Also, typical James locking himself up in the bathroom. He secretly is a teenage girl, isn't he? ;)

But yay I can go and read the next chapter with a bit more relief! :P

- Kayla :)

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Review #68, by ohmymerlinDecoding the Tutshill Tornados: The One with St. Mungos

25th September 2014:
I have legit fear.

The fear is in my bones.

I just don't want ANYTHING TO HAPPEN TO AMY IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR.

Poor Freddie I can't believe how horrible this is for him. It's like you hate all your characters, for goodness sake. Don't you like them at all?!

Anyway, I'm off to read the next chapter, praying that Amy will be okay! D':

10/10 of course!

- Kayla :)

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Review #69, by ohmymerlinCollision: Photographs

25th September 2014:
I LOVE FLUFF SO MUCH AND THIS WAS JUST SO BEAUTIFUL

BUT OH MY GOD PLEASE PLEASE UPDATE AS SOON AS YOU CAN THEY'RE GOING TO HAVE /THE TALK/ HOLY MOLY

But three months she'd been dating James and she didn't tell him about Spencer?! That's crazy! But then again, I'm a very open person and an over-sharer so for someone to keep a secret that big is just mind boggling for me. I can kind of see why Freya would do it but I don't really think that it's a good reason...

BUT OH MY GOD SHE'S GOING TO KNOW HE'S A WIZARD AHHH

I also love how you can really hear the British in your writing. Are you British? Because if not, you do one of the greatest jobs of writing British-ly (shh I know it isn't a word)

At first I thought, "Oh, he's going to get away with the moving photo he's done it! Good on him!" But then she opened it and I was like, "Ooh so close, James. So close!"

It's definitely going to be interesting seeing both of their reactions! I absolutely cannot wait for the next chapter!

Also, absolutely LOVING Freya and James at the moment. They are both so adorably cute!! :D ♥

10/10 of course!!

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: Ah, hi!!

I LOVE FLUFF TOO BUT I WAS SCARED EVERYONE ELSE WOULD FIND IT OTT! 'The Talk' is going to be such fun to write I promise it'll be done soon :D

I know - I know, three months is forever! I'm ashamed she didn't tell him sooner, too... hopefully more of her reasonings come to light in the next chapter. I had to find a nice balance between her secret (which should be told asap) and James being magical (which the ministry wouldn't be happy with if it happened straight away).

Yes, I am British though! Although I'm almost certain I use Americanisms sometimes - oops. Things like film/movie and sweater/jumper I use interchangeably :p I'm taking a few liberties with this work most of all since it's set in Yorkshire, a place I'm very familiar with :)

Thank you so so much for reading and reviewing and sharing your thoughts!

xo


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Review #70, by ohmymerlinResurrection : Reunion

25th September 2014:
AW THEY'VE REUNITED!!!

I love how professional and realistic Rose is. I really love her character. If I knew her in real life I would admire her so much but maybe even fear her a little bit :P She doesn't seem like someone who you should cross, haha!

I really, really, REALLY loved the last line where you wrote about Danny and Cara hugging. It was such a beautiful sentence. You've got this knack for writing single sentences that just impact your readers to the core of their very being :P

Great update! Can't wait to read the next one! Especially as it's getting so suspenseful!! :D

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: Rose is one of my favorite characters. She has a lot of unresolved feelings with her family, but she pushes it all aside for when she's working (which can be a good and bad thing). I imagined that with the family she has, she has got to be scary otherwise no one woudld listen xD

I'm SO glad you liked how I wrote Danny and Cara's reunion. It was a scene that I wanted to do justice, and it was incredibly nerve-wracking posting this up!

The next chapter is all written, so thank you for sticking around, reading, and reviewing! Things will definitely start to pick up a lot faster from here :)



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Review #71, by ohmymerlinTrixangela Snape: Year 1: Chapter 1: All Aboard the Hogwarts Express

25th September 2014:
Hello! I am so sorry about the nearly three month delay! I can't believe I let it go that long D:

So you've asked for opinions on the story. Basically I think this is an interesting plot idea. I generally don't like stories where characters come back from the dead and Lily/Snape stories BUT you've made it work quite well :)

However, I feel like Trixi talks way too young for her age. I really doubt she'd still be calling Snape 'Daddy'. I also feel like her knowing that Potion was a little too unbelievable especially because it was like she'd just memorised it from a textbook. Maybe if you had her reword it in her own terms, it might sound a little more believable :)

I also don't understand what Luna did to the dementors. Maybe just explain that a little more?

But I must say, you portrayed Draco so accurately, haha! Especially as he was so much nastier in the third book! You wrote that very well :P

Overall, it seems very interesting. Just work on some explanations and try not to make Trixi too childlike. Obviously she's going to be a bit childish and immature, but she's still eleven and she's going to school for the first time so she'd probably be acting a little more mature because she feels like she's a big kid now :P

Feel free to request again :) And again, sorry about the delay!

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: Thanks for your review! :)

I actually wrote Trixi purposely this way, because she's been sheltered all her life and doesn't know how quite to act as mature as her peers would. You will see she is mature in other ways though; her character was well thought out, my best strength is character development :)

As far as her text book responses, this is also just her, she has memorized a LOT of potions, and she feels important with explanations like this, it helps think that she is proving herself to Snape, her teachers, and peers.

Draco, yeah, I have had a lot of help with him and other cannons, my beta Leonore has been so good with this :)

Last, the Luna thing was left that way as a mystery, and you won't find out about it until much later in the book.


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Review #72, by ohmymerlinA Blossoming Romance: Wedding Planning, Lies And Spending Way Too Much Time With Potter

25th September 2014:
Hey, Sophie! So sorry about the crazy delay in this! I honestly didn't think I would take nearly three months to get back to you :(

Okay, first of all I honestly think Chloe is being extremely selfish. I understand she wants to get married but there are so many things wrong with that. She's way too young -- school relationships are a lot different to real world relationships and she won't understand the difference until she's out of school and then it'll just be too late. The second reason is that a wedding and a marriage is not only a celebration of two people in love but of two families joining together and hiding this all from her family is absolutely ridiculous. I don't care what Chloe's reasons are, I do not agree or approve of them! :P Mumma Kayla wants to set this girl straight and give her a stern talking to! I'm literally so angry at her hahaha so kudos for writing such a believable character! :D

Okay, so you asked if the interaction between Al and Alyssa seems real. Honestly, I think it's a bit too casual but I've never really been in that position. I mean, I've had people who I haven't talked to in ages but we'd never purposely ignored each other so when we got together it was like nothing had ever changed. But I think you've written it rather well. And even if it's not completely realistic (because honestly if I was Alyssa I'd be a little annoyed and not so willing to talk to him, but that's because I'm a grump haha) everyone still loves it :D

I do like those little reactions Alyssa gets when she's around Al. I think we all get like that around our crush (especially a topless one!) and I think you wrote that very well! :)

However, I did notice a few sentences that sounded a bit odd and could probably be reworded a bit more nicely:

Stretching I made a non human noise as I felt my back click, which made Albus who had just come back, look at me like I had grown a third arm or something.

Maybe try: I groaned as I stretched. Al gave me a look as if I'd grown an extra head as he heard my back click.
This probably could still use some tweaking but see how it just sounds just a little nicer?

I was pretty sure Albus was so close I could feel him breathing, correction I could hear him breathing. Like my own it was fast.

We were so close together that I could hear him breathing.
See how it just flows just a little better? I didn't know how to add the fast breathing part because every way I worded it made it sound like they were panting from running a race or something :P I just think the 'like my own it was fast' sounds a bit odd.

Albus Potter was kissing me with tongues and I was kissing him back in the same way.

Albus Potter was kissing me deeply and I reciprocated.
Now, this may be a personal thing but when I saw the 'kissing with tongues' part it made me wrinkle my nose because it gave me an image of a slobbery gross kiss you see drunk people do in the middle of a club :P

Okay, so basically I think you're doing SO WELL with this story! I can definitely see so much improvement and I have to say that you've got such an addicting writing style! I can never stay away from it! There's just something about the way you write ;)

So again, so sorry about the delay! I didn't realise it'd nearly been three months :S Hopefully next time won't be like that!

Feel free to request again! It seems that I have a LOT of catching up to do!!

- Kayla :)

Author's Response: Hey Kayla!

Ahh that's okay. I honestly forgot until you reminded me on the forums :p

Chloe, of Chloe. She is of sorts. Plus as you said she is most definitely too young, not to mention getting permission from her mum, when she wasn't sure what it was. School relationships, oh boy, most of them don't last but some do, depending on how this goes you'll find out eventually whether Chloe and Lorcan will be that small percentage who stays together. Haha, you can set her straight, though she might not listen!! But I agree definitely about the marriage bit :D Haha thank you.

Al and Alyssa, ha they're fun to write what with being awkward. Same here, it's a bit weird but as far as those two are concerned nothing about their friend/relationship is normal. Haha, deep down she is annoyed but secretly she isn't that annoyed :p

Those moment are my favourite to write. Their little moments ♥ And topless boys, need I say more :p

Oh those two get drunk together at some point ;) but I totally see what you mean with each little thing!!

Thank you!! You're partly to thank for some things, so thank you again ♥ :D Ahh it's perfectly okay.

-Sophie :D


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Review #73, by ohmymerlinThe Unsinkable Molly Prewett: Come On Down To My Boat

12th July 2014:
It's official. I love Mr and Mrs Prewett's relationship. It's exactly like every old married couple that I've ever met. And yes, Hippolytus wouldn't be colourblind because it's generally on one of the chromosomes but I've forgotten all about it seeing as it's been over half a year since I've done biology and it's nearly 3 am hahaha but I did do countless projects and assignments on it so I should remember but ah well :P

I really loved this chapter! I loved how bewildered Arthur seemed to be at Molly's parents having a normal married life, hahaha! And it was funny that Molly got the twins to leave by being able to help them with their mischief, haha!

I loved how witty this chapter was! You write humour so fantastically!

10/10

- Kayla :)

House Cup 2014 review

Author's Response: Oh he's not at all colorblind, he's just full of it haha. He likes to mess with his wife. She doesn't even like pink and decorates in it to mess with him, though. Ah relationships.

Arthur has no idea what to do with the Prewetts, bless him. He just wants to be around Molly no matter where she is. The twins are surprisingly helpful!

Thank you so much for the kind review!


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Review #74, by ohmymerlinThe Unsinkable Molly Prewett: Cant Take My Eyes Off of You

12th July 2014:
AHHH GOOD OL' BILIUS

He's such a laugh, oh my god! I had to really hide my giggles in as it's half past two in the morning and if I woke my parents, they would not be as calm as Molly's father! Also, interesting name! Very... wizard-like :P

Oh, and Arthur has been subjected to the mollycoddling that all the Weasley boys (plus Harry) endure in the books, haha! But his mother seemed a bit more intense than our Molly :P

And oh god every time Gideon and Fabian talk I can't help laughing! (Well, stifling my laughter) You've got such a knack for writing humour and fluff and romance. I LOVE IT

Absolutely loved this chapter! I couldn't stop laughing the whole time!

10/10

- Kayla :)

House Cup 2014 review

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Review #75, by ohmymerlinThe Unsinkable Molly Prewett: Ain't No Mountain High Enough

12th July 2014:
Aw, they're all good again! I love that Arthur loves Molly not despite of, but because of her bossy qualities! That's just so sweet! :'D

I love their little council meetings though! Those are such brilliant ideas and it's so true of what teenage girls would do! (Actually, any age girls would do it :P)

Cecilia's speech of men are like dogs gave me life :P I loved it! Hahaha, it was so funny! I have a soft spot for female characters who are heartless cynics that just have no time for boys, and Cecilia fits the criteria perfectly, hahaha! :P

I also love Siobhan! She's slowly becoming one of my favourite characters in this story! :D

I loved the bit with Fabian and Gideon! I love seeing strong sibling relationships in stories and you've really managed to write this one so wonderfully even though Molly seems to be scolding them a lot of the time! :P (Although, I admittedly also do that with my younger brother so that's probably why I love their relationship so much, haha!)

At first I wasn't happy with the chapter because Arthur was being funny but then they made up and all was well :')

- Kayla :)

House Cup 2014 review

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