Reading Reviews From Member: Gabriella Hunter
  
732 Reviews Found

Review #26, by Gabriella HunterThe Last Keepers Of The Light: Chapter One

12th June 2015:
HELLO!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with your review for our swap. I'm sorry that it took me so long to get to it and it's also very nice to meet you. I don't believe we've talked before or anything so this is always nice! :D

So...that was pretty amazing! I had absolutely no idea what was going on from the very beginning but instead of becoming frustrated by that, I was completely absorbed. I'm not sure if it's because I could practically taste the fear that poor Ms. Blanc was going through (I love how you never reveal what her name is until the end and even still, it's not her full name.) and was desperately trying to sort through this. I love being dropped right in the middle of the action like this when I read, I can't write scenes like this very well but this is really awesome!

I like that we're right in the middle of what could only be one of the worst days of her life. It's clear that there have been plenty more before this but you have to wonder what happened and why. There's this whole mystery around her and what the Death Eaters are up to and by mentioning the Holy Grail at the end, I could feel my "Oh, Crap-O-Meter" go off. I think that's actually a good twist too, it reminds me of how Hitler was intent on having the Spear of Destiny and actually had quite a huge interest in the occult.

It wouldn't surprise me that the Death Eaters would be keen on learning more about this as well and with what we know about Voldemort, I think that fit in very well. I am worried about what's going to happen to Ms. Blanc though, with the scum that she's had to suffer with early on and her horrible treatment, she's out of options for making a friend.

What I really liked about this chapter though is how real she is. I mean, she's terrified and alone but you can still tell WHO she is or at least, who she WAS at some point. I mean, the best part of this to me was when she recognized Crabbe and even recalled her moments with Draco, feeling a sense of betrayal even though they had never been friends. I do wonder though, what they think they'll be able to accomplish and what sort of information she has.

Hmmm...

I am very intrigued! Thanks for requesting this for me!

Much love,

Gabbie

 Report Review

Review #27, by Gabriella HunterCrash Landing: The Cousin, Knight, and The Captains

12th June 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums again and I thought I would stop by with another review, I didn't want you to get the idea that I was just reviewing and ditching. Hahaha.

I really like the friendship that you've built between Iris and her friends. They have a good history together and I particularly enjoyed the bit about looking at old yearbook pictures. I would rather burn mine, personally but I liked the companionship in that moment, it's not something you see very much. I guess it's because they'll be graduating this year that they're able to look back at everything for a bittersweet moment but I really liked that. Also, Iris had better cover up her crush well before they start REALLY teasing her about it!

So, I feel like Iris is going to be having more than a little moment with Lily at some point. I have a weird feeling that Lucy is setting her up for something but I'm not going to be suspicious for too long if I'm proven wrong. Nice addition t have here, by the way but my suggestion would just be adding a bit more detail about her background, her appearance and whatnot. I got a bit of her personality here but those other little details would really flesh her out but what I liked were the other characters that you introduced.

There are some warring personalities here, especially with Alex's brothers. Very curious about how that dynamic is going to be and I'm really, really, hoping that Iris is able to have some kind of talk with her ex. I don't know why but I think it would be great drama fuel and I love reading that in stories. Hahahha.

Hugo again, eh? Guess I'm going to have to wait until the next chapter to find out what happens next...

See you again!

Much love,

Gabbie

 Report Review

Review #28, by Gabriella HunterCrash Landing: The Boy, Enemy, and Best Mates

11th June 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums (My name pops up as Gabriella Hunter but just call me by my nickname, everyone does.) and I'm dropping by to give you a review! I'm not sure if you're new to the forums and archives but welcome and it's nice to meet you!

I always like reading Next Gen stories, I really enjoy seeing what people come up with for the Weasley children and their OC's. It's always refreshing to get a look at Hogwarts from someone else's perspective so I'm glad that you started this from Iris's POV instead of say, someone like Albus or James. I'm glad that I was able to get to know a bit more about her and from this chapter, I think that she's pretty fun-loving but has a temper. Hahaha. I kind of winced through her whole recollection of Lily Potter too, I can only imagine how bad that must have been.

Also, I've never read Lily like this before so this is really neat. I always see Victoire and Dominique being portrayed as seductive blossoms but this was a nice little twist! I wonder if we'll be introduced to her? I'd like to see how her reactions with Iris are when they're alone together or forced to interact. Hehehe.

I'm interested in seeing how Iris gets along with Hugo too and when they'll meet. It seems like something struck her about him that's both annoying and fascinating, which is always a great combination. I hope that we'll get a chance to see them together, I have a feeling that they'll be bumping into each other soon. :D

I think that you introduced her friends pretty well, though I would like a bit more information about them. I felt like some of the scenes went a little too fast so I wasn't able to get into the setting but that's just a little nitpick. There were some grammar things in the beginning that I think you can sweep through and correct as well too but other than that, keep on writing!

Much love,

Gabbie

p.s.: I also have a review thread if you're interested in having more chapters reviewed for you. It's in The OWL Post section if you have trouble finding it, I know I did when everything changed and I'd been gone for a while. Hahaha.

 Report Review

Review #29, by Gabriella HunterA Spoonful of Sugar: Sixteen

8th June 2015:
HELLO!

I told you that I would stop by immediately and here I am! I was really curious about what was going to happen during the holidays and this chapter didn't disappoint! I liked that you included a bit more about Darcy's heritage in the beginning of this chapter, it's nice to see cultures mixing. The entire atmosphere felt so relaxed and happy that I certainly didn't expect that ending!

But before I talk about that, I wanted to mention how adorable Darcy is. She's so afraid of developing true feelings for Louis and I'm really curious to see how that eventually blossoms. The "Love, Darcy" bit was hilarious and although I don't think Louis took it seriously, I wonder what he really thought. Hahaha. I'm glad that they equally enjoyed their presents though, making their relationship a little more solid and the entire scene at the Burrow was well-done.

Too many Weasley's and Potters! Ah!

But that ending...

I had a feeling that something was going to happen but I'm not sure what might happen in the next chapter. I don't like picturing an angry Louis! ;___; What prompted Luke to say such a nasty thing and why was Dom crying? Did he break up with her? Hit her? I want to know more but I'll be back in a few days, I've got some challenges to finish and then there's the stories that I've been neglecting.

Mercy...

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie!
I really wanted to put more of Darcy's Indian heritage into the story, and it seemed right to add it here, when she's home with her family and would be eating homemade Indian food.
Darcy is definitely afraid of feeling too much too soon, because she doesn't want to get her heart broken. So, of course, she'd read way too far into a little thing like writing "love" in a letter to Louis. Louis knows Darcy so well that he knew not to take it seriously. But I think the fact that he didn't tease her about it says a lot about his feelings for her. He knew she would be freaking out, and didn't even think of teasing her.
Luke was really drunk, so he was just being really nasty to Dom, hence the crying. He didn't hit her, but he certainly wasn't being nice to her. Although his being drunk doesn't excuse anything. He's not a very nice guy sober, either.
I'm so glad you enjoyed this, and like where I'm taking this story! Thanks for the review!
Cassie :)


 Report Review

Review #30, by Gabriella HunterA Spoonful of Sugar: Fifteen

7th June 2015:
HELLO!

I told you that I would be back and I'm sorry that it took so long. I'm also sorry that you don't have any fresh material to read from me but I'm going to be working hard this week to get some stuff up for you. Hahhaa. I'll be heading over to the Fourth Daughter soon too!

So, Darcy and Louis are the cutest. I think that I really like their relationship because they balance one another out and seem to give more than take. Darcy obviously isn't comfortable expressing her softer side and Louis isn't really serious most of the time but together, they create fireworks. I love them! I think that I really liked the beginning of this with Louis kind of bribing Darcy into falling for his compliments. It was hilarious reading her reaction and by the end of it, I think she just gave up trying to fight him. I do hope that Louis will be serious at SOME point but I have a feeling he'll be saving that side of himself for later. Hahahha.

I really liked that dinner scene at the end too, Dean's reaction was priceless. I was roaring because he obviously didn't believe that she was telling the truth and I was so happy that her parents were okay with their relationship. I have a feeling that Seamus is going to take Louis aside at some point and have a talk with him but I'm sure it won't be anything bad. Hahha.

Darcy's feelings for Louis are deepening and I can only imagine how Christmas is going to be at the Burrow. :3 I'm heading right to the next chapter with my fingers crossed for Lys and Lucy too!

Thanks for the read!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie!
I'm so glad you like Louis and Darcy together! Especially considering where they were at the beginning of this story! Haha. But I love them, too. They're becoming one of my favorite couples to write! I think they balance each other out well, and can just feel free to be weird and silly when they're together.
I don't think anyone really believes she's telling the truth until she has Louis there to back her up. She's just been a little too free with her insults towards him in the past for people to believe that she likes him now. Haha.
I'm so glad you enjoyed this chapter! Thank you for the review!
Cassie :)


 Report Review

Review #31, by Gabriella HunterFaith: change.

7th June 2015:
HELLO!

This is Gabbie from the forums here with our swap and I hope that you didn't think that I wouldn't stop by! I had intended on doing this yesterday but I was being greedy and got sick eating Chinese food. It was awful. ;__;

Here I am though! I thought that I was going to have a tough time selecting the right story that I wanted to read from you but this caught my attention. It's great to see more diversity on the archives and I'd love to know more about Faith, her backstory and if she has a close bond with her relatives. I kind of got the feeling that they don't see one another often but maybe that's just me? Hm...I really liked how easygoing her friendship with Austin is. It's great to have that one friend you can drag to live in a condemned house with.

Man, can I relate to that...

I AM curious about their lifestyle too! Musicians living off the grid (Or in their case, a very plush apartment for a while) is always a fascinating read. I'd really love to know what sort of music and sound they have going on, whether or not they're famous or merely doing it to pass the time. I think that you've got a lot of room to add in those little bits and I'll be sticking around to find out!

Now, early on I've got the feeling that Faith has a little trouble attaching to people. I could understand a little of Cassie's anger but at the time, I had a feeling that Faith was running away from the issue so I'd love to know more about her past relationships. I don't often see bi characters on the archives either so this is a refreshing change! I'm really curious to know what inspired you to write this!

Not sure how they're going to clean up that broken down new home of theirs but I'll be stopping by again! :D

Much love,

Gabbie

 Report Review

Review #32, by Gabriella HunterActions Speak Louder than Words: Bent: Rose POV

7th June 2015:
HellO!

This is Gabbie from the forums with your review and it's great to be back! You know, I read this first chapter ages ago but I can still remember it and it only took a little bit of re-reading of the first chapter to get back into this! :D

I'm also sorry for how late this review is, I ate Chinese yesterday and my stomach was like: "This is hilarious. How about you get sick now?" and so that was how my entire evening went. I also had big girl stuff to do and that was pretty annoying so this review might be a tad long!

Anyway, it was great getting back into this story. I was curious on how it would proceed after the first chapter and it certainly didn't disappoint. I really, really love this version of Rose that you've written--she's awkward and a little introverted to the point where I really want her to branch out. I personally know what it's like to feel disconnected from the world and I thought the opening scene with the party was written to showcase this very well.

Even in a room filled with happy people, you can feel lonely and Rose's anxieties were pretty understandable. I also like the fact that each of her cousins is different from the other, though Albus and James are going to be banned from my heart forever since they can never settle on one girl. Someday, I'll have them for my own. *Ahem*

I like the awkward atmosphere that you created for Rose with this setting. I felt cramped after reading it and I could only imagine what it was like for her before Scorpius arrived. Their moment together was hilarious by the way, I really liked that they managed to bond. Scorpius didn't appear to be happy to be at the party either and while I'm curious to know why, he managed to bring Rose out of her shell for a moment.

I was SOOO hopeful for a few seconds but then that...weirdo showed up. What was up with that guy? I was so scared for Rose and then I was freaked out because the guy apparated while being immobilized. Huh? I have a feeling that we're going to be seeing him again and I thought the remainder of this chapter held not only sweetness but mystery.

What I liked the most though was the very end, Rose and Scorpius reached another step towards a better friendship. While Albus and the others argued and fought amongst each other about what to do with Rose, Scorpius was the gentleman and took her feelings into account. I thought that was a great character trait for him to have and the very end with the two of them, accepting comfort and closeness from each other was beautifully written. :D

Haunt my thread again!

Much love,

Gabbie

 Report Review

Review #33, by Gabriella HunterIsabella: A Midnight Surprise

7th June 2015:
HellO!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with your review and I'm so sorry for the lateness. I sadly thought that Chinese food would sit well on my stomach and I learned the hard way that things don't work out for greedy people. Hahahah.

Anyway, back to this! I was patiently waiting for you to bring me another chapter to read and I'm very fascinated by this world that you've set up, it feels very real. I like the history that you've given us about Juan's past and the fact that magic runs through his family, though it seems more like a curse to him. I was worried at first that he would be too angry with Marisol to listen to anything that she had to say and I was relieved that he gave her a chance to speak, even if it was only for a moment.

The fact that Juan kept this from Isabella and the others makes his story all the more sad. He was so traumatized by losing his sister and filled with so much guilt that he never tried to expand on his magical abilities and I think that's pretty sad. It reminded me a lot of Dumbeldore and I could understand why he wouldn't want Isabella to explore that side of herself.

There's no telling what could happen in the end but I think Isabella is braver than he gives her credit for. I'm sure that things won't be easy and I do wonder what will happen to her parents and siblings while she's gone. Will her mother forgive Juan for lying after all this time? How will Isabella react to being away from her home for the first time?

Marisol kind of gives me the creeps though and I'm not sure if she's going to be an asset or a villain. I'm curious to find out though and I really, really love the universe that you've created, it's very original! :D

Can't wait for the next chapter!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie!

I'm so happy to hear that you think the world I've created here seems real. Juan has had an unusual experience for sure, and I think it will affect his judgment of his daughter's magical abilities down the road, but for now he doesn't have much choice.

I'm glad you picked up on the parallels to Dumbledore.

A lot of those questions will be answered in upcoming chapters, although I'm unfortunately dreadfully slow at updating.

Marisol is a sort of somewhere in between character. While I don't think she's necessarily evil, I don't know that she'll ever be likable.

Thanks for the review!

~Kaitlin


 Report Review

Review #34, by Gabriella HunterYear Five: The Question

7th June 2015:
HellO!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with your review and I'm sorry for the lateness. I got caught up doing big girl things and time just kind of flew by without me wanting them to. I also had a nasty battle with Chinese food that practically destroyed my stomach...

But you don't need to know about that. >.>

There were a dozen little things in this chapter that I would like to touch on but I know that I'm going to end up forgetting something. I'm always blown away by just how complicated and detailed your characters are, they feel like real people and I honestly think I'd known them at some point. I can picture this broken little group so well in my mind and I enjoyed being back in Isobel's head, I was curious to see what she had been up to now that the gang was clearly separated. The fact that she didn't notice Tristan's disappearance was a really brilliant way of showing just how disconnected they had become from one another.

Isobel did the right thing by confronting Emily about what Tristan did for her though. I really, really loved the conversation that she had with Pomona too. I didn't expect it but I'd hoped that there would be an intervention with her eating disorder, though you hinted that the professor already knew. That is a sign that an intervention might be happening soon later on and I'm curious to know more about how that plays out. I WAS diverted from that issue though when Isobel asked about Tristan, finding out more about him than she had expected.

There are a lot of qualities to the boy that she doesn't like but she still went out of her way to help him. I think the fight between her and Emily was well-done too, I think we've all hated our friends and argued like this. Emily of course got over her anger a tad but Isobel clung to it for a while longer and I wonder now if the two of them will ever patch things up. I have a feeling that it's going to be a bumpy road if they even dare to get past this little event.

Now, I'm very proud of Laurel's progress too and I think what really struck out to me about her conversation with Isobel was this: She wanted to know what it would be like to be loved in that way, basically saying that she had no idea what real affection was. That struck me numb for a moment because I've felt the same and related to her on a deeper level because of it and I wonder when Isobel will ask that important question about herself.

Now, would it be wrong of me to want to find Quirrel's remains and scatter them into the four winds? I was so shocked by that entire encounter (Though I did find their entire talk about flight very neat. Those ingredients that she had mentioned from Tibet reminded me of levitating monks and I'm not sure if that's what you were going for) that I let loose a few very naughty swear words.

My mom gave me the death glare...

I was glad that Isobel got away but the shock of it has to be terrible. I'm glad that she ran into the twins and managed to purge some of it out (Getting drunk is apparently the best cure and I shall remember this) but it's ironic that this would happen to her and not say, Emily. I'm not sure if you did that on purpose or not though but I picked up on it immediately.

Aberforth shouldn't let underage kids drink!

Also, I LOVE your portrayal of the twins. I loved them before but after this chapter, they are seriously my favorite version. They feel more fleshed out in this story and I like the bond that you gave them with one another and Isobel.

It felt very authentic.

"Ear-off" made me wince. Hahahah.

Anyway, another great chapter and I'm really eager to know how Isobel deals with what nearly happened to her. Hagrid is going to have some trouble with that dragon egg but that's not the focus of this story but I DO like that you included the creepy hooded person too, reminds me of the fact that this is taking place during Harry's first near-death experience at Hogwarts.

Hahah.

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: The great reviews are the hardest to respond to. Thank you for this and sorry I'm so late!

I'm glad you mentioned Isobel's perspective and the group's separation. I think that not noticing that he'd gone was sort of disturbing to her, since she's always been the mum of the group. It comes as a shock then to find out that one of her friends has been gone for DAYS without her even noticing :(

I always really enjoy writing Pomona. The kids' perspectives are so muddy and ambivalent and confused, and rising out of that with some adult clarity from time to time always felt refreshing to me. I hoped that Pomona's observations could kind of act as a trustworthy perspective of where everything is at.

The tension between Emily and Isobel is something I've been building since their first chapter together. There's a kind of slow burn there, where neither is really inclined to get upset with the other, but at the same time, Isobel's been consistently questioning Emily's decisions and Emily is now ultimately frustrated by being treated like a child.

What you said about Laurel and true affection is, I think, very apt. Her trysts with Tristan (heh) haven't left her feeling very good about herself, and her family is a small one, with just a mom (who's steez is kind of withholding affection). Laurel is an affectionate person, as indicated by her habit of sleeping next to Isobel when she's sad.

Ugh, the Quirrel scene was so hard to write! In the end, I just decided to write very little. Who really needs more description? (And yeah, the flying convo was totally inspired by Tibetan levitating monks)

I'm glad you mentioned the irony of Isobel being the victim, rather than Emily. I think that kind of ties into subverting the rhetoric that someone was 'asking for it.' Assaults can happen to anyone, and it's pretty much always shocking and terrible when it does.

It's SO relieving to hear that you like the twins! They're such an intimidating challenge to write, but I found I really enjoyed it. Like, I sort of just knew them so well that their dialogue and behavior flowed really easily.

Thank you sosososo much for this review! And sorry AGAIN for taking forever to reply!

xoxo
Roisin


 Report Review

Review #35, by Gabriella HunterDon't Forget Me: My Hero

6th June 2015:
HELLO!

This is Gabbie from the forums dumping a review on you for our swap! Thank you so much for the lovely review you left for "Again", it was more than fantastic. :3

My goodness! What on earth have you created? Why haven't I read this sooner?! I'm blown away by how wonderful this is! I didn't expect anything from it and I'm sure that there's a whole other story that I'm missing. Is this one-shot part of a set? Is it a companion piece for a full novel? If it isn't, I want to read it nyow!

Anyway, I wasn't expecting this at ALL. I am so horrified with James and upset with what happened to Albus. That takes some devotion but I am blown away by how much he loves his brother and the fact that he's taken the blame for killing their own cousin. What led up to this?! I am so sad about the entire thing because Albus doesn't feel important in his own family and James sounds like a selfish pig (Sorry, but it's true). I want to rescue him but this ending gave me such a bad feeling...such sadness, man. Hahhaah.

Anyway, totally enjoyed this and make sure you let me know if this story has a full novel! >:D

Much love,

Gabbie

 Report Review

Review #36, by Gabriella HunterLike Clockwork: Antiquity

6th June 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with our swap! Thank you for the lovely review you left for This is Angelina, I was in a puddle of feels reading it. I haven't gotten much on that story in a long time! :D

Anyway, this was really interesting! I'm fascinated by this world that you've created and I didn't expect time travel to take any part of what I read! I was so worried for Cecily in the beginning because we all know how horrible those witch trials were and I was certain that this would take place in the past. It sort of does, in a way but what I really liked was your imagery during that scene, she can't control her magic, doesn't understand why this is happening and her fear felt so real. I wasn't sure if she was going to make it to be honest!

By the time she's running away, I was sure that the villagers were going to follow. I was SO relieved that Everard found her instead, I enjoyed the mix of religion that you added into this as well. Hell, heaven and the places in between are mentioned in this first chapter rather well. For someone living during that time period, that meant the world and I love how you weaved that in here. :D

Now, this second part had me really shocked! I didn't think that Cecily would have been sent back more than once! It's like Quantum Leap! (That's an awesome show that you should check out if you're not aware of it already) I'm REALLY curious about this story now! How long has Cecily been doing this? HOW is she a time traveler and why? What does she have to stop?

Ah, it was really good! Thanks for the swap!

Much love,

Gabbie

P.S.: Don't be shy about stopping by my review thread either, I'd love to read more!

 Report Review

Review #37, by Gabriella HunterThe Internal Monologue of Annett Sinclaire Kluge: How I Receive My First Detention

3rd June 2015:
HELLO!

This is Gabbie from the forums with your review and it's great to be back! I haven't had internet in a long time and I wasn't able to get back into reading my favorite stories but here I am! We shall never be apart again! ;___;

Anyway, it's great to be back with Annette and the gang. She's just as socially awkward as I remember and I love that she's so "outside" of what's cool or normal. I think that makes her pretty darn original and I'm curious to know what might happen between her and Al. I remember in the last chapter that there were quite a lot of new feelings going on between them (Well, Fufu anyway) and I enjoyed reading more about that here. I wonder if Al will ever find out about what she was up to though? Hm...that's one mystery that will be revealed in the future, I suppose. Fufu shall remain a secret!

Anyway, I though that this was pretty hilarious. I mean, I know that the centaur is probably still in danger and everything and I really hope that Annette will be able to help him out but this entire thing was just so funny. The party itself seemed completely out of her comfort zone and I really loved the fact that you made certain moments so awkward. It was great to read, especially the confusing Rose/Scorpius love fest that we saw. Wonder how that is going to play out? Haha.

What's so funny about this chapter though was the fact that Annett can put the fear of God into almost everyone. I was roaring when she was dishing out threats to Peakes but that ending was just...so much emotion! I really want to punch Chu in the throat and I feel sorry for Annette, too much emotion for her all in one night isn't going to be a good thing, although he did deserve it. Hahaha.

Anyway, it's great to be back and I'll see you again soon! Don't be shy about posting this in my review thread!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Gabbie!!

i am thrilled that you liked this!! No we shall never be apart again. [hug tackle] You are much too kind to me.

I am so happy that you still find Annett original. That means so much to me. Her and Al? Hmm. . . interesting theory. ;) We shall have to see, I guess. Yes, for now, Fufu shall remain a secret, but can you imagine, though, how awkward it would be to have Fufu revealed as Annett? :P

Hilarious is what I was going for, absolutely! I am so glad you thought so! :D

She really can. XD. I love her for that. The Chu scene was my take on a drunken kiss scene. What she did there can actually be used to grapple somebody to the ground. :P

AND IT IS GREAT TO SEE YOU BACK!!! ♥ I've missed you!

Love,
Em


 Report Review

Review #38, by Gabriella HunterBruises: Terror

3rd June 2015:
HELLO!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by for our swap and it's nice to be back. I have no idea why I avoided reading this for so long but here I am!

I think that this was a pretty fantastic story, I have never read anything like it! I wasn't quite sure with what was going on at first but I was able to piece together everything by the middle.

O___O My mind is blown!

I was really impressed with the way you wrote this, I don't think I would have had the guts to start a story out this way. I like to jump right into the action sometimes but this air of mystery that you held for the first half is something that I never would have accomplished. I think that's pretty amazing, you've got some great skills! Being so wrapped up in Caroline's mind like this made me wonder what we were dealing with, I thought that she might have been the victim of a Death Eater attack, possible Memory Charm failure or someone suffering from extreme PTSD.

I was SO wrong!

This story actually had me feeling a bit angry, though. I feel that there are plenty of witches and wizards out there that have been mistaken for crazy, (Especially before Hogwarts was founded) and it makes me feel for her. What she went through was just insane and I can only imagine the damage it caused! I think the most shocking thing about this is the actual bruises, not only the physical ones. Caroline and her sister have damage to their minds as well, their hearts are going to take a long time to heal. I do wonder what will happen to them and I have this urge to punch their father in the throat. I want to let the hate flow through me...

Anyhoo, this was great! I have nothing really to say, other than you missed a few commas early on that don't need your immediate attention. Otherwise, awesome job!

Much love,

Gabbie

 Report Review

Review #39, by Gabriella HunterTurbulence: Prologue

2nd June 2015:
HELLO!

This is Gabbie from the forums with your review and I'm SO sorry that this took a while! Do you remember how I made that post about watching Attack on Titan? Well, it was actually two days in a row without sleep. Hahaha. So, my review thread was momentarily forgotten...

Anyhoo, here I am!

I am very curious about this story! I don't think I've read anything quite like it before. We don't often see stories on the archives that deal with mental health issues either, this was a lovely change. I'm not familiar with your Astoria's world and I feel like you have done this on purpose...(This is a not so subtle hint to put that story in my review thread). That is not fair!

Okay, I didn't immediately understand what would happen in this chapter. I thought that maybe Astoria would just be having difficult accepting her family's wishes but my goodness, this took a route I didn't expect! I started to worry when Ana wasn't catching up to her though and I'm really worried about her now. Do they see one another again? :o

What I liked about this chapter though was the fact that Mrs. Greengrass (By chance, Astoria's mother black? Just curious about this.) and Mrs. Flint were talking about the possible rise of Voldemort. I think that they took a very passive stance with it but I admire the fact that they acknowledged their own fear for their children. I'm sure that plenty of pureblood families felt the same during this time and I'm curious to see where they stood later on.

Now, as for Astoria's condition...I'm kind of upset with her father. He's so against Muggles that he won't even give her medication? That's insane! I felt so badly for Astoria, she doesn't understand what's happening to her and now she's been sent away. Daphne's smug smile at the end was enough to have me boiling though...I do wonder if she'll be able to become well enough to send one of her own. Hmf.

Anyway, I liked this! I thought it was fresh and unique. You should keep this going, if you weren't intending on doing that initially and thanks for the read!

Much love,

Gabbie

P.S: A Force of Wills misses your face, would love to see you reading that again!

 Report Review

Review #40, by Gabriella HunterAfter: One.

2nd June 2015:
HELLO!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with your review and junk! I'm sorry that it took so long to drop by, I could go on and on about how I sat around binge-watching Attack on Titan but you don't need to worry about my nerdiness.

So, this was a fresh idea that I've never seen before. I always wondered what happened to Cedric's parents after he passed and I think that you showed the levels of grief very well. I like the passage of time that you included too, it didn't feel to be choppy either. I could really understand what Amos was going through: Grief is a tricky emotion and it leads you back and forth with memories, emotions and blame. You could sit there and numb the rest of the world out but it only takes one small moment of recollection for the grief to come tumbling back.

I thought it was a very powerful thing to write, it's honestly not something that I've seen before and I really appreciate what you've done here. I wrote a little about PTSD in one of my stories (This is Angelina) but I don't focus on one character's trauma like this. I think that you showed the decline, guilt and horror of it very well though.

Amos has lost his son, his wife and his need to live. I wonder though, if he'll ever find the strength to move forward and I really, really loved the very end of this story. Time heals all pain but not when you need it to, which is what I gathered from reading this.

I honestly thought it was brilliant and thanks so much for requesting it for me!

Much love,

Gabbie

 Report Review

Review #41, by Gabriella HunterBewildered: Prologue

30th May 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dishing out our swap! I thought I'd attack this immediately since I didn't see your reply earlier. We've never spoken before either so it's nice to meet you and junk!

Anyway, I don't read much Rose/Scorpius stuff on the archives. I can never really get into this pairing and it's not because I don't like them, exactly...I just don't really see many original things with them. I like the idea of this really stressed out Rose though that can't really break away from her parent's expectations.

I think that's a pretty good character trait for her, overachieving no matter what she really wants. It's a bit sad but I can understand why she would want to break away from that too, which is why her need for adventure doesn't seem so out of the blue.

I like the fact that there's a mysterious villain in this story too. Those Slytherins sounded pretty awful though and I think that Rose's assumptions of Slytherins is about to change after her encounter with Scorpius. I'm curious to see how their relationship develops and I'd like to get a bit more out of Scorpius, personally but I think you have plenty of time to set that up.

Hmmm, as for CC's, I think that you can merge a lot of these short sentences into bigger chapters. There were a few words that need to be capitalized but other than that, you're all good so don't stress it!

Thanks for the swap!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hey Gabbie!

I know I've seen you around a bit, but I've never said hi so well hi! Haha! It's a pleasure to meet you!

It's funny you say that, because I really don't write a lot of ScoRose. I'm not fond of the pairing myself, because it's a bit too obvious you know. And people really over do the "I hate you no wait I love you" trope with ScoRose. I think that's quite absurd even for a normal couple! Plus I'm a Lily II/Scorpius shipper myself... Hehe!

When I write this I always try hard to walk a thin line between original character and canon with Rose. I felt that it would make the story lose credibility and perhaps seriousness if Rose wasn't at least a bit like her parents. But I wanted to make my own mark on Rose and how she's portrayed. So thank you for appreciating my Rose! :)

The mystery villain is one of my trickiest things to write! Because nobody wants a wizard who comes along and is basically another Voldemort. So I had to come up with Stark who is like Voldemort in terms of the whole pureblood mania thing, but he goes about it in a completely different way. He's like Voldemort 2.0. Better you know, more maniacal and all that! Hahaha!

Well that's kind of true... It's not like this whole revelation that Slytherin are people too kind of deal, but it's just a slight change of heart!

Who doesn't want more Scorpius? Am I right or am I right? ;)

My Beta harps on me all the time about combining paragraphs in my other stories so thank you for pointing this out, because no one has edited this yet! Haha!

Thanks for reviewing and I hope you enjoyed what you read!

Off to go give you your review! :)

Sincerely,
Ireland


 Report Review

Review #42, by Gabriella HunterA Spoonful of Sugar: Fourteen

29th May 2015:
Hello!

I'm back! It's been so long since I've stopped by and checked on this story. It was on my list of course and I've been so busy lately that I didn't have the time but I WAS sneaking little snippets of this when I was free.

I enjoy how much Darcy has changed, her refusal to even acknowledge Louis has shifted into a fear that she may actually love him. You can tell that it makes her uncomfortable and the last scene proved that her feelings for him are growing faster than she can stop them. I love that Louis isn't affronted by her attitude or how stand offish she could be, he took her head on without a fear in the world. That's someone that Darcy really needed, I think and I'm curious to see how they develop from here. I thought the entire first bit of this chapter was hilarious! Louis is just so laid back and the entire thing between him and Daniel was nearly too much.

I'm waiting on Lysander and Lucy to make some sparks fly now. Got my fingers crossed!

You know, I can honestly relate to Darcy a lot towards the end. She was beginning to feel somewhat threatened by her own feelings for Louis and that's something that I can understand. It's uncomfortable to realize how much you love someone, especially when you've been hurt so much and I think that you wrote this very well, their relationship may become something far more precious than they realize. ;)

Thanks for the read!

Much love,

Gabbie

P.S.: I have nothing really new up aside from Audrey (Which I had to reboot) and Abandon. I'm going to try and get some fresh stuff up for you, A Force of Blaise is halfway finished and I'll work on that tomorrow. See you then!

Author's Response: Hello! I'm so glad to see you back here again!
I'm really happy that you like how Darcy's changed over the course of this story. I think when you're writing stories like this, where the main character ends up falling for someone she originally hated, it's really hard to make the changes gradual, so they feel more natural and not forced. So the fact that Darcy is still uncomfortable with a lot of things, while she's slowly accepting that her feelings for Louis are changing, is my attempt at showing the way she's still growing and changing now that she's in this relationship for real.
I'm so glad you thought the end was relatable! Personally, I'm the really emotional type, so I actually relate more to Louis than Darcy when it comes to talking about feelings, so I'm glad that you thought the way I wrote her here was realistic.
I'm so glad you enjoyed this! Thank you for the lovely review!
Cassie :)


 Report Review

Review #43, by Gabriella HunterThe Most Beautiful Flower: The Most Beautiful Flower

29th May 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums with our swap, I don't think either of us had the time to really get these done. Sorry that it took a minute, I would have been here sooner if it hadn't been for lame real life issues...

Anyway, Snape! I LOVE reading stories about him, I think he's such a complex character and it's always great to get new takes on him. This was a really sad one-shot though, I don't think many people would have been able to write about such a sad moment in his life like this. I certainly wouldn't have been able to but you've written this so beautifully.

There's a touch of bitterness in his narrative too that I like as well. Snape loved Lily and his reflections of her are so tender that when he thinks about what the world will remember her by, I can't help but agree. No one will really KNOW Lily or James for the people they had been and it made me think that the small things in a person's life mean the most. There was so much heart to his memories of her that it nearly broke mine, I thought you wrote this so wonderfully.

We don't really see this side to Snape but I enjoyed delving into his mind. The love that he had for Lily may have been one-sided but being cared and understood by someone reached a part of him that no one would be able to grasp. That would be their secret, I suppose. The ending of this of course had me tearing up though and it was a great way to close off this one-shot, I'm really impressed. :)

Thanks for the swap!

Much love,

Gabbie

 Report Review

Review #44, by Gabriella HunterAn Illusion of Sanity: The Detrimental Effects of Gravity

29th May 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums with our swap and it's nice to meet you and junk. Thank you for the lovely review for "At Midnight", that story doesn't get any reviews so it really made my day.

Anyway, you wanted me to read the third chapter instead of the first two and I usually don't do that but here I am! If you want me to read the first two, you can stuff a request in my review thread and I'd be happy to get those reviewed for you too.

Okay, from what I was able to gather from this chapter, Perri is having difficulties adjusting to Hogwarts. I'm not really sure but there were a lot of references to things that weren't done in America, versus how they are at Hogwarts. I thought that was interesting and I'd love to know more information about what was going on to make her transfer, if that is the case. I'm also curious to know more about her relationship with Fred, it seems like there's a slight bit of flirtation going on but she's unsure what to do about it. Hm.

Now, since I haven't read the other two chapters, I'm not able to gauge who's friendly with whom but I think you wrote them well. No one seemed to be the same and while I was a tad lost, Perri has a sharp sense of humor and absolutely no social graces. That's always refreshing and I'm curious to know what happened with that knife...I think she's got a lot of mystery going on.

Anyway, CC wise there were a few grammar things that you should clean up. Add a few commas here and there so your sentences won't seem so drawn out and I think you meant "woman" instead of "women" in one paragraph. Other than that, I thought this chapter was good so thanks for swapping with me!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hi there!

Thank you so much for the review! Sorry for the oddness of having you skip the first two chapters! I'm sorry if it was a little weird for you! I will definitely go back through to fix the grammatical issues that you pointed out! Thank you so, so much!

xx Rachel


 Report Review

Review #45, by Gabriella HunterYear Five: Interrupted

29th May 2015:
HellO!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with your review and I'm SO sorry that it's taken me this long! I would have been here sooner but some real life stuff kept popping up. Whenever I was able to get online, I'd have to do boring grown up stuff. It's such a pain!

Anyway, it's good to be back! There was so much that happened in this chapter and I'm not sure if I'll be able to touch on every monumental thing but I'm going to try! I liked that we're back in Emily's head, I was wondering how things would play out now (Especially after the Tristan/Laurel thing) and it didn't disappoint. I liked that she was beginning to see just how sick Isobel is becoming and I wonder how the group will handle the issue. There was so much happening though that I don't think they'll be able to get to that particular problem anytime soon.

I enjoyed the moment that Emily had with Tristan, I can kind of see how they would be as a couple but at the same time, I still wonder if they'd be any good for each other. They've liked each other for so long but even still, that doesn't necessarily mean that they'll last. I'm not sure if that's what you were going for but while they were in their "bubble" I couldn't help but think that and one thing that I really loved was Emily's patience with him. Now, anyone else might have been too aggressive with trying to get answers out of Tristan but I appreciated the fact that Emily backed down somewhat once he began to get uncomfortable. They were speaking in a strange rhyme though that I don't think even they understood but there was something about that was surreal and touching. I had my fingers crossed for that kiss.

And then Laurel happened.

Now, I'm going to say that my jaw dropped a little with her entire section. I know that you haven't strayed from your POV in each chapter like this but I think they blended well. I was still able to follow everything without it feeling choppy so good job on that! Anyway, Laurel discovered something about Snape that she could use against him (Though I'm going to give him points here for not denying it) and Tristan's secret is finally revealed!

I had a feeling that it was Death Eater related but I was still shocked. What is Laurel going to do now with that knowledge? I'm worried that she's going to start self-spelling again too, where did she vanish to? Gah, I'm so anxious for the next chapter! I want to know if she's going to get expelled!

I'm really curious to find out how the gang will cope with all of these monumental changes. Emily is already starting to branch out more towards other people and I loved that you included this point: You can have as many friends as you want but that doesn't mean you have to let them rule your emotions.

I know that's not exactly what the lovely Tonks said in her letter but it's pretty much what I thought. Letting go is a huge step in growing up and I really love this aspect for the story, I hope that it won't be too late though. ;___;

Thanks so much for the read!


Much love,

Gabbie


P.S.: Here's something fun for you since you include music lyrics. You should go listen to The Weeknd's song "Earned it" while reading the first chapter of Audrey Tang. It will blow your mind with it's awesomeness!

Author's Response: You continue to astonish me with how amazing and insightful your reviews are! And whatever you say, I still think of them as DAMN timely!

I'm really glad your felt ambivalent about Tristan/Emily. That scene was an absolute monster to write, and I wrestled with it to no end. And your comment about it being 'surreal' is just SO flattering. I really struggled with the tone, and never wanted it to go too far in the "sweet" direction, while still keeping it, like, sweet at times (and then pull back and make it Complicated). And the 'strange rhyme' comment--yes! They are very much talking around things there, and it all gets very abstract and strange. This story is rather a shipper's nightmare, but in reality, teen relationships are rarely Grand Romances.

I'm really glad the rapid POV shifts worked! I wanted to kind of build suspense and all, and also, liked the idea that POVs stay less consistent now that their lives are getting so mixed up together.

Getting reader reaction on Laurel for her whole section is always really interesting. Some people are furious at her for her selfishness, while others admire her bravery in facing Snape and discretion for keeping Tristan's secret. For some, it's the moment they start to really like her, while others only hate her more for it. And I think there's a case to be made for both perspectives--Laurel is a lot of things. Chiefly, she is young. And you're right--it's heavily implied that she went and self-spelled in the bathroom after everything :(

I think that's a pretty solid interpretation of Tonks' letter :) Emily, out of all of them, is probably the best equipped to make new friends. The other ones have a complicated sort of cocktail of Shame and Superiority that makes it difficult for them to get on with others, but Emily doesn't struggle with all of that.

Oh man, listened to that song and YEAH you are right! It fits really well, and as it's a long song, so it carries through most of the chapter!

xoxo
Roisin

(PS, I posted the first four chapters of my novella and totally plugged "This is Audrey Tang" in the A/N of C2!)


 Report Review

Review #46, by Gabriella HunterA Disaster In The Making: Mr. Evans

27th May 2015:
HellO!

This is Gabbie from the forums FINALLY getting to our swap and I'm so sorry that it's taken me so long. I haven't forgotten about you!

So, this was a neat way to start this story. I haven't read many stories that talk about Lily's parents and definitely not opening a chapter, so this was pretty unique. I like that Lily's father is the one who has to handle all of the responsibility when it comes to his daughter's choice in boyfriends. That's usually something the mother would handle and it made the absence of their mother even more poignant. I know that this isn't a sad story but that's something I think made this stand out, Petunia's dislike of Lily filling in the void. The two sisters are obviously nothing alike but it's clear that a lot has changed over the years and I'm curious to see how this Christmas will go.

I'm a little worried, actually...

I liked the brief mention of Vernon here too, I'm sure that he and James will not be the best of friends. Haha. I did like that Lily's father knew OF James though, it would have been a bit much if Lily had just dragged him home. The fact that Lily hasn't mentioned that they're together only makes this more awkward and a little funny, I'm really eager to see how they interact!

I didn't spot any CC's that you need to worry about and I love the ominous ending to this chapter. Thanks for the read!

Much love,

Gabbie

 Report Review

Review #47, by Gabriella HunterBurning Inside: The Perfect Servant

27th May 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with your review! It's so good to be back reading your work, you've always been one of my favorite authors. I kind of want to sit in a corner and try to force some awesomeness out of my own stories...I'll get there eventually. Hahaha.

Anyway, Bellatrix. I'll admit that I've never been a fan of her character and I usually choose not to read stories about her but this was so fantastic that I might reconsider that rule. I thought that you chose to write about mental illness and sadism as rather bold (I applaud you for that because some writers are awfully squeamish about things like this), it's refreshing to see something so raw dominating the archives.

I am not sure how you were able to get inside of Bellatrix's head so well but I was completely engrossed in all of her actions. The first scene is so graphic, bloody and horrifying but you wrote it so smoothly (And without any pretense) that I was hanging onto every word. I loved the descriptions that you gave to Bella's actions too, the "fire" that raged in her body while she tortured her victims. The joy that she got out of their suffering leans towards sadism/psychopathic tendencies and I'm amazed that you managed to write it without flinching.

I actually loved that scene the most, I thought her attraction to Voldemort fit in well with what we already knew. There was so much devotion and even lust there that I got chills but once Voldemort showed up, I was unsure where this was going. I'll admit that I'm very immature and when I read the word "Naked" I giggled.

Ignore me.

Anyway, I thought that the transition from Voldemort to her father was brilliant. I'd always wanted to see more from Bella's interactions with her family and while I think that she fears her father, I got the feeling that her pride was the most important thing. A prideful fool is a horrible thing, apparently but I loved the grittiness of it and the fact that she's thrust back into reality by Sirius's goading.

Two family members with completely different views on "pure" magic. That was a great parallel, actually and that ending...man, it had such an ominous ring to it and I wanted to leap into the story and stomp on that flame. Hahahaha.

Anyway, I know that some people would be put off from the graphic nature of this and the violence but I thought it was amazing. I would love to read more mature stories like this on the archives and while I've touched on some issues (Strippers, sexuality and depression) I have yet to even attempt something this gritty.

So, wonderful job!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hi, Gabbie! Sorry for taking so long to respond to this. Let's dig in...

I agree that the archives could use some more "raw" writing. I tried to tread lightly on Bella's mental state. I wanted to paint a certain picture of how she came to be the way she is, but I didn't want to turn her into a sympathetic character. She's still a horrible person: cruel, arrogant, sadistic, prejudiced and violent. But there tends to be a bad story that goes with every bad person, so I wanted to see whether I could draw that out without this becoming a fluffy attempt to redeem her.

A few reviewers have suggested that maybe I was a little **too successful** at getting inside Bella's head. Perhaps I should seek counseling. ;) I'm glad that you didn't see any "pretense". I don't think the situation deserves any.

I wanted to see whether I could capture the insane awe and reverence she feels towards Voldemort. For her, it's akin to an erotic experience, but he only reciprocates these feelings in her mind.

Sadly, if the dementors couldn't extinguish Bella's "flame", I don't think the rest of us have much of a chance.

I agree that some people would find it off-putting, but it is what it is. Horrible things happened during Voldemort's reign of terror and those acts were committed by horrible people. I just try to deal with it in the most realistic way that I can.

Thanks so much for the wonderful review!


 Report Review

Review #48, by Gabriella HunterThe Wrinkles of the Road: Rose. --- A Weasley Family Saturday.

26th May 2015:
HELLO!

This is Gabbie from the forums with your review and because I don't think we've been properly introduced, it's lovely to meet you! :D

So, I don't read much Scorpius/Rose even though there are a thousand stories on the archives. I could never get into this pairing much but I like what you've done with the characters here, they don't seem to be forced onto each other simply because of the "Bad Boy"/"Good Girl" angle that I've seen.

Now, I like that maturity that you've given Rose and the fact that you started this chapter with family and ended it discussing family. That's actually something that I found very well-done, I'm not sure if anyone else caught the parallels between the beginning and end.

Rose loves her family and it's made clear in the first few paragraphs. We get a lot of detailed information about her and I feel like I know her pretty well and enjoyed the discussion she had with Albus too. The cousins that you introduced so far all have distinct personalities and I really like that you've done that--usually in a story, they're just a sea of faces but I feel like I would know them well after continuing with this story. Anyway, I thought that the idea for the DCB was a neat addition to this story, Rose isn't written like this often.

I also love Healer James! :D

I do think it's a bit dangerous but I think that might be resolved somewhere down the line. Now, I know that you wanted more input on Scorpius and Rose's relationship and I have to say that that I like them as a couple but I sense a bit of distance between them. I'm not sure if it's intentional, since they haven't gotten past some issues but I think that they work together.

I'm worried about Scorpius's insistence on Rose meeting his grandparents though. I can understand both of their POV's but I wonder if he's having second thoughts? There was some hesitation in his behavior that I picked up on but that might have been done on purpose. I'm curious to see what happens with these two, I wonder if they'll be able to stay together if things start to go wrong.

Anyway, I liked this! I didn't spot any CC's that should worry you so don't worry about that. Feel free to re-request!

Much Love,

Gabbie

 Report Review

Review #49, by Gabriella HunterAtonement Is Coming: A Surprise Announcement

26th May 2015:
HELLO!

I'm back! I bet you're getting really tired of seeing me show up, eh? Well, too bad! Hehehe.

I thought that I'd continue reading this story since I loved the first chapter so much (You have free reign to try That Night if you wish but anything that captures your interest is fine) and I really enjoyed this. The fact that you have brought a little happiness and joy into this story oddly made what happened previously more ominous and threatening.

I know that danger is on the horizon and yet, I feel like this small moment of peace will be the first and last for a while. I did like seeing Harry and the gang once again, I liked the choice of home that you gave Ginny and Harry too. You usually see them all hoarding in Godric's Hollow but this is really different and gives him the solitude that he deserves.

I also liked that you included some small hints of trauma. That's not something we see very often, Hermione's nightmares are a good example of things not just being swept under the rug. I wrote about PTSD a little in one of my stories (This is Angelina, I think) and it's good to see that brought back up again. After everything that they've seen, it had to be tough going back to their lives.

With the addition of James in Harry's life, he can finally start moving his family towards a better future but remembering the dead during their dinner added a touch of sadness. I thought it was really well-written though and I think you handled his brief moment of depression well.

Can't wait to read more!

Much love,

Gabbie

 Report Review

Review #50, by Gabriella HunterOh My Darling: 1

25th May 2015:
Hello!

I'm back! I thought that I would pop on over here and give your new story some love. I still need to catch up on The Fourth Daughter and A Spoonful of Sugar too but you'll be getting reviews on those later in the week. My review thread isn't very full so expect more than one! :D

Clem seems like a different sort of girl for you and I like her! I haven't read a story about a bookish type girl in a while and she seems slightly introverted too. It's refreshing to see that she's interested in her studies and not salivating over boys but I have a feeling that certain things are going to be out of her control, especially with that ending. Hehehe.

I like that you didn't put too much detail in this first chapter though, you can slowly build up your world without crushing us with information. We're pretty sure who Clem is by this point, though I think she prove to be pretty fascinating later on. I liked Elizabeth and the contrast she gave to Clem too, I'd like to know more about their friendship in the future and see how it holds up when trouble starts. ;)

You shouldn't stare at people you know, unless you want Albus Potter's attention. Heheheh.

I'll be back!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie! I'm so happy you decided to check out this story!
Clem is different from the girls I usually write, but she's also a lot more like me than the others, too. She's definitely an introvert, and loves her books!
This chapter was definitely focused on introducing Clem and Lizzie, and showing a little bit of what their friendship is like.
You'll get more Albus in the next chapter! I hope it will be fun for you to read him, because he's really different from your Albus!
Thank you for the review!
Cassie :)


 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login

<Previous Page   Jump:     Next Page>