Reading Reviews From Member: Gabriella Hunter
572 Reviews Found

Review #26, by Gabriella HunterThe Fourth Daughter: The Governess

12th August 2013:

Cassie, its always such a pleasure coming back to your work! I'm so sorry that its been a while since I've last reviewed for you, I don't have internet at home and life sucks without it. I'm going through withdrawal...
But on to this! Ah, the girls and their suffering with Rowena. I really love these scenes because it shows so much range with the girl's personalities and I just adore Bea. She's hilarious but Dezzy was too busy wondering about Salazar? Could it be that she's starting to have deeper feelings for him? Argh, I would love to know! I'm sort of worried that there's going to be more going on with those two and it was great that Mistress Helga noticed how distant she's been. I really liked the brief information you gave on her, I had wondered about her personal life for a while now. :D
But the issue with their father is growing and what about Godric? What about their golden-haired babies?! D': I want that to happen!!! But gosh, that ending...I'm so worried! D':
What's their father going to do?!
I can't wait for the next chapter, this was simply fantastic and I'm really rooting for the girls! I hope they won't stop going to dance because of this and I Aunt Rowena doesn't become suspicious...
On my end, expect Abandon in a little while and after that we've got A Force of Blaise. Hahahahah.
Until then and thanks for the read!
Much love,

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie!
I had so much fun writing another scene with Rowena, even if she is so mean! I love the range of the girls' personalities, too, and their reactions to their aunt really shows that! And Bea never fails to make me smile when I'm writing her! She's never afraid to hide her emotions!
And Dezzy and Salazar... Things with him will continue to slowly develop, so don't worry! But things may surprise you, too! Heehee. I loved writing Helga, because she was the Founder I'd developed the least, but I've loved her character throughout this story. She's the closest thing the girls have to a mother, and they're all very dear to her.
You'll just have to wait and see what their father does! but I can tell you that it's not going to be pretty!
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing this! You're reviews are always so wonderful! I can't wait for Abandon!
Cassie :)

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Review #27, by Gabriella HunterPicking Up the Pieces: Impression

6th July 2013:

Its Gabbie again with your requested review and I'm really sorry that its taken me so long to get back to you. Anyway, it was nice to get back into this story, I was really curious on where it was going to go and you didn't disappoint. So, I liked your introduction of Draco in this chapter, I really felt like you set up his character really well. The only thing that I would like is a bit more of the scene being set up and just the smallest detail of Astoria for those who don't know her or who she's supposed to be. Three or two sentences would have been enough just to set up how their relationship is even more than you already hinted.
I do like that you have Draco an Auror though, its not something that I see very often. I was curious about all the cases that he was dealing with and I was wondering why there weren't many Aurors around. Hm, the questions! :D
So, on Anaxandra's side, I was really impressed with her not saying a word but I think she came off as a little unlikeable. The only suggestion I would have for her is to soften her out a bit, she seems to insult people alot and it makes her appear really hard. But that's just me, I did like her interaction with Draco, it was really interesting and he didn't seem like he was easily swayed or bullied. What her family did was pretty interesting though, I've never heard anything quite like this before so that's really got my mind going! There are all sorts of possibilities on what might have happened to her family and I really can't wait to see how you develop all of that! :D
Aside from that CC that I mentioned earlier, the rest of this was really well-done and I enjoyed your flow and pacing too. Its a quick, great read and I loved it. :D
Much love,

Author's Response: Thank you very much for the review, and it's no problem at all with your timing :)

Ahh I'm going to put this under heavy editing AGAIN. I was having a hard time putting out well written chapters because I could write the chapters I envisioned in my head very well, but I couldn't come up with good imagery for my other chapters :/ I'm working on it now, and there will be the details you mentioned.

But! To your questions! I'm going to answer the auror question and Astoria question later on, so there's that. How I felt I needed to portray Anaxandra is that she has only grown up and really been around her family her whole life, so while she does know how to be polite and she can act cordial, she can't properly handle the situation she's in because 1) she's incredibly defensive and 2) this isn't the most comfortable situation for her so the insults are a way for her to distance people. I want the reader to be able to discover things about her as time goes on, because this will not be her personality 100% of the story. I'm trying to only make it about 25%.

Again, thank you so much for the review, you're awesome and I will definitely re-request if that is alright :)

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Review #28, by Gabriella HunterDear Al: Prologue

30th June 2013:

Its Gabbie with your requested review and I thought that this was an interesting start! I haven't read anything quite like this before so I'm really interested to see where you go with this.
I thought that the tone you set up in the beginning of thsi left me sort of curious on whether this was going to be a dark story or not. With Harry musing about how his life had turned out while reflecting on all the bad things just really touched me. I also love your take on Albus as well, I think that you wrote this really nicely. He seemed like an ordinary little boy here and I liked the added unease you brought on with him and his fear of being put in Slytherin. It was a nice transition I think for the rest of the chapter that led to Harry going to visit Snape's old home. I found that to be really unique and different too, I had never read anything like that before so I was really fascinated. With Harry feeling the need to know Snape and find his own answers, I think it was a nice way for him to find his own closure. He didn't know Snape and what he did for him was something that I don't think he'll ever truly be able to explain. And when he found the diary and photo, I just felt my heart tighten because I know how much it meant to him to find just the little bit of his mother there.
I can't wait to see what else you've done for this story! The only CC's I have is that your past and present tense was a bit off and that there were some minor spelling things but other than that it was a great read. :D
Much love,

Author's Response: Hello Gabby! :)
Let me start off by saying that I really really love your reviews :) And I'm so glad that you have thread for this.
Now, getting to the review. Thank you :)
I'm happy that you were able to sense exactly what I was going for. I don't think anybody can ever explain exactly how Harry would have felt about Snape. It's just very complex. But seeing as he practically hated the man when he was, I would be inclined to believe that that would motivate him more to find out about Snape and his life. I'm glad that this story seems unique... And I'm touched that this brought out some pretty strong feelings in you. I'm happy that you think that this is both interesting and realistic.
Thanks a LOT :)
I will look into the tense issue soon.
So long
(Till I ask for another review :P)

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Review #29, by Gabriella HunterThe Elementals: Shameless Brilliance

29th June 2013:

Hey there, its Gabbie with your requested review and its a pleasure to meet you and all that junk. So thsi is a very interesting story indeed! I really love stories like this, they're so unique and to dash in some Hogwarts is always very fun. This was very short but I enjoyed it and I like your writing style too, I was able to get into Blaise's character without any problem.
The added little details about Rose were pretty interesting too. With her, there's always a unique way to write her and I'm curious to see what you do with her character later on. The loss of magic and how her family might feel if McGonagall gives her to the Elementals just hints at really great future chapters. I can't wait to see what you do later on down the line!
The mystery about the Elementals themselves will keep me hooked on this for a while. I'm all for strange things and I can't wait to hear your backstory on it!
So no CC's or anything and feel free to re-request! This is easy to follow and didn't confuse me at all so I hope you keep writing!
Much love,

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Review #30, by Gabriella HunterPicking Up the Pieces: Freedom

27th June 2013:

Hey there, sorry for being late once again with this review! Anyway, here I am! :D
I usually don't read a story right in the middle and I was really confused on why you wanted me to review this particular chapter instead of going in order. I had no real idea of what was happening here but tried to follow it as best as I could and found that the established personalities that you made were really well-done.
I think I like your Draco too from this chapter, he seems like he's not quite as snobbish as he can be in other stories. The fact that you had him being an Auror was interesting as well, it wasn't something that I had seen him doing much in fanfics so I think that's pretty interesting too. What I really want to know is what's happening with all the murders suddenly popping up and why they're happening at all and what Anaxandra might have to do with them.
For some reason, I found myself not really liking her that much in this chapter, she seemed alot different from the first chapter I read. She came off as a little bratty and stuck up and I'm not sure if she's just pretending or if there's a reason but it felt like an abrupt change. I should have just been naughty and read the other chapters to get a feel of what you've done with her so I'm probably not making a good assumption on her right now. :p
Anyway, I think the rest of this chapter was really good! I liked the moment that you included with Draco and Anaxandra while they were eating ice cream, there was some character growth that I really enjoyed reading. I can't wait to see how else they interact in the future!
There weren't any real CC's in this and I loved the cliffhanger nightmare ending! ;)
Much love,

Author's Response: Again, I love love your reviews and thank you! I asked about this one because I was in the middle of revising the other ones so the story would flow better because I hadn't really taken in to consideration the actual styles in which I was writing. I didn't want to make him as snobbish because.. well I'll ask you to read the other chapters to fill in the blanks :) Sorry for requesting a chapter in the middle, and I will re-request as soon as my revised chapters are validated!

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Review #31, by Gabriella HunterEyes of Glass : Eyes of Glass

21st June 2013:

Its Gabbie with your requested review and I'm sorry that its taken me so long to get back at you. I have really bad internet connection and couldn't do as much as I would have liked with my feeble connection. Hahahha.
Anyway, this was amazing! I really, really enjoyed reading this. I was hooked from the moment you introduced Alice all the way to that gripping end, I really have no words!
I think with this one-shot you gave me a great new way of viewing Alice. I have only read a handful of stories with her character but this is going to be my favorite, I somehow enjoy your version of her so much more. A quirky, unsure girl that's determined to make her own way just reeks of Neville to me and I love that you made that subtle comparison with them.
The history that you have given through this had my mind blown, it was enough detail in places to keep me following along easily and also just enough to have me really enjoying your characters.
On some things with Alice though, I felt like she kept shifting her personality around a bit and it felt like she was written differently at some point. But thta's the only thing that I noticed about that, I really loved the relationship you built with she and Frank, there was something so sweet and touching about it.
The christening itself was described wonderfully, added with it just a touch of sinister events to set up what was happening in the world around them. I really loved how you did this, adding in Alice's fear and her uncertainty about Marlene, which turns out to be a justified fear in the end.
I thought that the action you introduced was great and it had me scared for a moment and worried by the time the story was over. I was really surprised by the ending! I thought you would continue on from Neville and Alice in their home but it spiraled to the present so lovely and shockiningly that I had to congratulate you. The reminder that Alice is now mad and does still love her son but can't express it just tears me up. Ah, and that last line! >_< Almost had me crying! Wonderful work!
As for Cc's, I think some sentences should have a few periods so the flow could be smoother but other than that, I really loved this.
Much love,

Author's Response: Hi! No worries, it's great to see you here now! :)

I'm so glad you liked this story, it really is such lovely praise! I'm pleased you enjoyed Alice, and saw her in a new light. I really wanted to bring her to life here and show her insecurities, strengths and weaknesses, and she was definitely inspired by Neville. I'm glad you could see the parallels between them. I'll go back and edit this at some point and try to fix the inconsistencies, thanks for pointing that out! :)

I'm glad you liked the history and context of the story, and that it didn't seem too watered down. I've never been to a christening, so the invasion of the Death Eaters came at the perfect time! I'm glad you thought the descriptions of the event were effective!

I'm so pleased you like the ending as well, and that it flowed alright. It's just such a tragic story, and I wanted to do them justice. I'm so glad you were emotionally invested in this story, it's very lovely to hear. Thank you for a brilliant review! :)

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Review #32, by Gabriella HunterPicking Up the Pieces: Loss

21st June 2013:

Hey there, its Gabbie here with your requested review and I'm SO sorry that its taken me half a year to give it to you. -_-
Anyway, what a great way to start a story, you had me wrapped into this from the very beginning and I really stayed hooked all the way to the end.
There was some very gritty and evil things happening and I'm actually feeling quite amazed that you started your story out so violently. Well done! I'm all for angst and action you know but what a horrible thing for Anaxandra! What sort of battle is happening? Who is killing her family and why? You've brought up some great questions for me and I hope you reveal them slowly and surely.
I thought that the moment she had with her parents was really sad and the fact that her mother turned back just broke my heart. I think you captured all of her pain and sorrorw so brilliantly and I can't wait to find out what happens or if she'll get the help she needs right now.
As this is the beginning of a chapter, I think a few details could have been needed just to bump your story up a little. A brief description of Ana and her parents would have been nice and I would like to know the time-frame but perhaps you'll leave that out for later? :D
Also, some of your sentences are so lovely that they could be put together without so many periods so the flow would go smoother. Other than that, I loved it!
Thanks for the read!
Feel free to re-request!
Much love,

Author's Response: Thank you for reviewing! That was exactly the kind of critiquing I needed! I will definitely re-request :)

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Review #33, by Gabriella HunterThe Fourth Daughter: The Bracelet

15th June 2013:

I told you that I'd be back. So I love that I'm all caught up on this story now and you've actually got me kind of nervous. But anyway, what I really enjoyed the kinship between Dezzy and her sisters and I was really surprised by Addie. I think she's shown some good growth as a character and I wonder how rebellious she'll be in the future in regards to she and her sister's welfare.
On the other hand...I'm kind of starting to think that the girls going to see Salazar is not such a good idea. The imagery you used though was simply perfection and I could see it so celarly in my head and really enjoyed getting back in touch with it. It feels so otherworldly but slightly strange...I don't know why but I think something really bizarre happened while she and Salazar danced. Was there a time leap of some sort? Are she and her sisters becoming addicted to the pavilion? Argh, the questions...I hope you update for this soon!
Salazar gave her a present too, I wonder does it have some sort of magic? Does it draw her to him more? What is she going to do about her father and Godric?! ARGH! Update soon please! :D
No Cc's either, just that I'd have liked a bit of a longer chapter. Hehehe.
Much love,

Author's Response: I have you nervous? Good! That's what I was going for! ;)
I really wanted the sisters to come even closer after Dezzy horrible conversation with the King, and I think Addie's transformation was the most major during that. Being the oldest, she has this sense of duty to do what her father wants, while also protecting her sisters, and I think this chapter is when she finally understands that thinking of the girls first is the only way she can really look out for them and their happiness.
I'm thrilled that you liked the imagery! I have such a clear picture in my head of Salazar and the pavilion, that I want to make it as clear as possible when I'm actually writing it. And when she and Salazar danced, time still passed how it normally does, but Dezzy was so absorbed in their dance that she feels like no time at all has passed, even though it's been hours. And the bracelet that Salazar gave her isn't what it seems, and will be important in the story, so keep an eye out for it!
Thank you so much for such a wonderful review! I'm so happy you're enjoying this story, even as it gets darker and more bizarre and mysterious. Thanks again!!! I really can't say thank you enough!
Cassie :)

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Review #34, by Gabriella HunterThe Fourth Daughter: The Perfect Daughter

15th June 2013:

Hey, I told you that I'd pop on over here and here I am. I'm not a liar you know! So its great being back with the girls and I'm terribly sad that they haven't snuck back to the pavilion yet. But with what happened in the last chapter I can't really blame them and I was really feeling sorry for Dezzy in this chapter. I could totally understand what she was goign through and I think you wrote her and her father's confrontation very brilliantly. He didn't seem to want to acknowledge that he had a problem in not talking with the girls and I really hated that about his character just then.
I'm wondering what's going to break through to him with that and I feel so bad for Dezzy, trying to express herself and then being shut down. What I didn't expect was for her to go to Godric, I thought that she would run to Salazar! But oh, the sweetness! I just want that ship to work out between her and Godric! I want that to happen so badly! I think the little kiss he gave her on her hand was just sheer perfection, I sort of had to contain myself but then was so upset when she decided to go to the pavilion.
Its strange on some level that Godric's kiss made her so happy and then she goes to see Salazar and dance. I wonder if she's either confused or just fascinated by him that it doesn't matter? Hm.
Well, this was a great chapter and I'm moving on to teh next one right now! :D
Much love,

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie!
I was really mean to poor Dezzy in this chapter, huh? But you're so good at torturing your female leads, so the fact that you thought I did a good job means a lot! :) They didn't want to take their chances sneaking off to the pavilion, so that's why they held off for a while.
Dezzy and her father have a really damaged relationship, but like Addie says, it isn't unfixable yet. Dezzy has to reach out to her father if she wants to keep the hope of getting along with him some day! But the King really isn't a good listener, and is way too wrapped up in his grief over losing his wife to hear what Dezzy is trying to tell him. The most fatal mistake he makes is not giving himself time to accept his wife's death, and try to reconnect with the girls. He's really hurting himself, because he doesn't understand that his daughters feel the same way he does!
It's going to take a lot to break through to him, and it won't be very soon, either. Sometimes extreme measures must be taken, though!
And I thought Dezzy would go to Godric because he's almost the complete opposite of her father. He listens to her, and tries to comfort her and make her happy. He doesn't put her status before the fact that she's human and that she's unhappy being forced to play the role of perfect daughter and princess.
And the end of this chapter was really interesting for me to write, simply because I wanted it to have a certain tone. His kiss makes her go to the pavilion because she associates it with freedom on one level. That's where the girls go to dance, and where Dezzy feels like she has the freedom to do what she loves and be herself. It's less about Salazar in that moment, and more about the dancing itself.
I'm so glad you enjoyed this chapter! Thank you for the lovely review!
Cassie :)

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Review #35, by Gabriella HunterKeeping Secrets: Secret Number 1

15th June 2013:

HEY! Hey. I'm here with your review and I'm SO sorry that it took me forever to get to you, my internet connection is so evil and I've been going through a ferocious writer's block with one of my stories and there are no cupcakes...
Anyway, back to this! It was not at all hard for me to get back into the groove of your story and I'm so happy that I'm reading back up on it, I was wondering how Charlie and Liz were doing!
So, the time leap that you took was very nicely done, there was no confusion and I was able to piece together their relationship so well. It seems like they've had a very nice marriage so far and yet, Charlie still hasn't told her his secret?! I was really shocked by this! I thought he would have done this by now but after reading through his thoughts, I can sort of see why and thought his fear and anxiety was just wonderfully done.
I was so nervous when he went to speak to Liz and she stunned me with HER little secret, which I have a guess about! But I could be wrong! ;)
But Charlie finally telling her the truth was really well-written, I think he really showed some courage and hope and it was so heartbreaking when Liz didn't believe him! D':
So what will happen now?! Update SOON! Poor Charlie, I just want to give him this big hug and smother him in chocolate...and...well, you don't need to know about all those OTHER things but anyway, poor him!
Update SOON!
No CC's either, this was wonderuful and I hope your next chapter leaves me on the edge of my seat like this one did. ;)
Much love,

Author's Response: I. Am a horrible, horrible review responder! I'm SO sorry it has taken me so long to get to this! And please, don't worry about the amount of time it takes to review; I'm just so thrilled that you do it! I completely understand about evil internet connections AND writer's block... and NO CUPCAKES?!? Merlin's Beard! *Sends you a virtual cupcake, stat!* :P

I'm glad it wasn't hard for you to get back into reading this, and I'm thrilled that you've been wondering about Charlie and Liz! It makes me happy to know you've been thinking about them! :p

Phew! I am so glad you thought the time leap was done well... that's one HUGE thing I was concerned about for this chapter! I didn't want to skip so much time that the reader was confused or felt left out, but the time jump was really necessary for the plot!

Yes, they have had a nice marriage so far, but somehow Charlie still hasn't told his poor wife about his secrets! I find it a bit shocking, as well, how dare he?!? :P But you're right... telling your wife those secrets CAN'T be easy, and with Charlie's anxiety, it's bound to be even worse. :( I'm glad you thought that was wonderfully done!

Haha! I'd love to hear your thoughts on what Liz's secret is! Nearly everyone who's reviewed this chapter so far has guessed the same thing! :P

I was even a little nervous for Charlie while I was writing that bit! And it really must have broken his heart when Liz didn't believe him... but looking at it from the "muggle" point of view, I'd find it hard to believe, too! :P Something I haven't really read in a lot of fics is a wizard revealing to their muggle spouse that they're a wizard, so I thought it'd be nice if I tackled that here... I hope it's believable!

Since it's taken me SO long to respond to this review, the next chapter is now already up! I can't wait to see what you think of it! And I agree, Poor Charlie! Haha! XD

I'm so glad you thought this was wonderful! And I really hope the next chapter DOES leave you on the edge of your seat! :P

Thank you SO, SO much for taking the time to read and review this! I really can't tell you how much I appreciate it! ♥

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Review #36, by Gabriella HunterBlemished Angels: Blemished Angels

15th June 2013:

Hey there, sorry it took me so long to give you this review, my internet connection has been terrible! It really sucks! :p
Anyway, so here we are. This character that you created here is very different from some of the others that I've read from you and I was sort of unsure if I should like her or not? With all the bad habits that you gave her, I would have liked to have seen more of her vulnerability and you did talk about it but I feel like you may have needed to focus on that more to make me more sympathetic.
I wasn't sure why Isabella acted the way she did or what her life was really like because she seemed to blow everything off. I can understand that she was lonely and wounded but I think a different side of her, before she and Regulus get closer would have made me soften towards her alot.
As for Regulus, I was surprised to see him in this because I wasn't sure what sort of pairing this would be so it was a nice little shock! For some reason I thought this was a James/OC but yay, Regulus! There's not enough of him around, you know! I think you wrote him very well here, he seems like a sensitive and caring person with his own share of secrets but the fact that he was able to break through Isabella's walls was very interesting to read.
I would have liked it if your story had only had a few breaks in it so the flow would be better but I could see that you were working up to something and I got over it. Hahaha.
I was pretty sad by that ending though!! It makes you wonder what if and there is no way that Regulus will ever know about his child and the fact that Sirius is in Azkaban and later dies himself just makes my heart hurt. :(
But that ending leaves a hint for more and I'm wondering if you're going to continue on from this one-shot? There's alot here for a full story in my opinion and I'd like to see a bit more from this, I think you have a good idea that would be great to read later on down the road!
As for the CC's that I mentioned, there were just a few spelling things but otherwise, everything else was fine! :D
Thanks for the read!
Much love,

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Review #37, by Gabriella HunterA Spoonful of Sugar: Eleven

5th June 2013:

Guess what? I'm back! I saw your post on the forums and came to attack this properly. I was really curious on where you were going to go with this chapter after the previous one and it really didn't disappoint.
So Darcy is having mroe than a few issues with her feelings regarding Louis, hm? I thought opening with that letter for her parents was just too perfect! Hahahaha. I could see where she was coming from too, it was really embarrassing and she wasn't willing to admit that she actually might like Louis. I hope you explore that a bit more in future chapters because I've gotten really curious! Why hate him so much if she didn't like him a little? Hehehe.
I did like the bit with her and Louis though, but I would have liked for it to go on for a bit longer. It was great seeing where and why Darcy wants to be a Healer, as its a personal thing that I don't think she would have told many people.
The fact that she has told Louis just makes the ending of this so much better because I'm sensing that the interest is deepening.
As for Lys and Lucy...-_- I have high hopes! I want that to happen! I ship them!!
I can't wait for the next chapter, I hope you update soon. I'm going to hop on over to The Fourth Daughter soon too, I've been promising that I would and haven't done a darn thing. Hahahaha.
On my end, well...I have a bit of Audrey done and Abandon is totally kicking my butt. I might hop on over to Blaise and Astoria soon and get that chapter, which will be super intense out of the way.
Oh, the angst!
Thanks for the read!
Much love,

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie!
I had way too much fun putting Darcy in such an awkward situation. But how do you really tell your parents you're dating someone, especially if you swear you don't have feelings for them? Darcy's struggles with her feelings about Louis will definitely continue to be a big part of the story. She's going to have to figure out how she really feels about him sooner or later!
I liked writing her conversation with Louis, because they've never had a real moment like that before. Darcy's starting to see sides to him that she didn't know he had, and it's just confusing her more than ever! I also really liked getting in the background about why she wants to be a healer. We already know that she can be controlled by her emotions rather than logic, so I thought her reasonings behind wanting to be a healer would be more emotional, too. She definitely loves her family, and I think that combined with her desire to help people really shows her softer, less snarky side.
And Lys and Lucy... Hopefully you won't be expecting when and how they get closer... ;)
Thank you so much for the awesome review, Gabbie! And I hope you like the new chapters of The Fourth Daughter, too! Let me know when you have something for me to read! I miss your stories!
Cassie :)

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Review #38, by Gabriella HunterLinger: Linger

28th May 2013:

Hey there! Thought I'd pop by and stalk something of yours that I hadn't read and here I am! Lovely to be reading something else and this was such a nice little stray from your usual work that I was sad when it ended. I've never read anything about Mary Cattermole before and I'd always wondered a little about them.
I love that you gave some hints of who she was as a person while also weaving in the dangerous and chilling presence of the Dementors. All of her thoughts were wonderful and I was glad that she was able to find some solace in her memories.
What I really enjoyed was the background you gave her and although I was a little sad towards the end knowing what had happened to her father adn sister, especially with reading the beginning of this, it left me feeling really sympathetic for her. I honestly do think you made her into a very relatable character and by the time you described her wedding, I was really engrossed. I think adding that right when her name is called and right when the warmth overtakes her was a nice moment.
Of course, we all know what happens later on, but you can't help but wish her the best and that she'll somehow get out of this.
Its too bad that this was so short you tease, because this was really well-done and I can't wait for more from you. :D
On my end, expect a Ben Malfoy one-shot tomorrow and then its back to A Force of Blaise, hopefully. Hehehe.
Much love,

Author's Response: Hello Gabbie!
I'm so glad you enjoyed this one-shot! I got inspiration for this really randomly one day, and then sat down and wrote the entire thing in one go! Haha.
I really liked exploring Mary's character, and I'm really happy that you liked the way I wrote her! I really wanted to show who I thought she would be outside of just the woman being tried for being a muggle-born, who happens to be married to the man Ron has turned into because of the polyjuice potion. That's why I decided to write a few of her memories.
The end of this story is sad, and I meant it to be a bit unsettling, simply because she's in a terrible situation, and she knows that there's a very slim chance she'll be getting out of it, but is still trying her hardest to stay optimistic. I think she's very strong because of that, and I wanted to show that through her memory that kept the dementors away, and how she tries to walk confidently into the courtroom. Hopefully it came across!
I'm so happy that you enjoyed this one-shot! I like writing this, and want to look at more minor characters to experiment with! I'll keep checking for updates from you, and will let you know when I have something new up!
Cassie :)

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Review #39, by Gabriella HunterTwist of Fate: Black

26th May 2013:

Hey there darling, here I am with a review (What's funny with this chapter and myself is that I'm listening to the Backstreet Boy's "Show me the meaning of being lonely") for you. I really missed this story and had been checking up on it alot before I left and I was so mad at you for not updating sooner! >:(
So, anyway, the beginning of this chapter was just super amazing. I mean, your writing was simply beautiful and I loved all the imagery you used just blew my mind. It was such a sad moment for Vivian but you wrote it so wonderfully and I just felt so bad for her, especially when she was at her mother's grave.
On a side note, I did like that you showed Astoria Greengrass and that you introduced Scorpy's sister for me. I hope we see them again.
Anyway, Viv and Albus had a moment together by her mother's grave and I thought it was such a poignant thing when you said "life and death" and she was pregnant by her mother's grave and being held by a man that she was having problems with. Ah, it was wonderful!
And the rest of this with poor Lily! I really love that you put her feelings into this whole situation and I'm feeling for her too, I hope things look up for her too.
And Eloise!!! Gosh, what the heck? Update that!!!
Towards the end, I was feeling sort of moody because Viv hadn't talked to Albus but just when I was about to explode, they have a discussion that I thought was very mature and heartfelt. I wish that they could have talked much longer but I think you're going to play around with that later. I hope!
And the end! Albus! UGH! Just go over there and apologize to Viv so she can feel better and then have that baby!!! ARGH!
I mean, this was so amazing and fantastic and I can't wait for your next update!
On my end, expect more one-shots and eventually I'll get back to Audrey and Abandon. There's a ton of A Force of Wills for you if you're still reading that and uhm.gosh, I'll have to start updating again.
Anyway, thanks for the read!
Much love,

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Review #40, by Gabriella HunterA Spoonful of Sugar: Ten

26th May 2013:

Hey there, did you miss me? Its so good to be back reading your work too, I really missed it and I'd been wondering how this story was going since I'd really missed it. :D
Anyway, Darcy and Louis are shaping up to be quite the not couple aren't they? I thought it was a good beginning for this chapter with Darcy and Lucy though, as the conversation did make her think about some things she would rather not. Honestly though, Lucy can't talk when she and Lys haven't gotten past being friends and such cause he won't say anything (I wonder how that's going to go...) but she did have a point. Darcy may like Louis more than she'll admit and I'm just waiting for the moment when that happens and she has no choice but to accept. Hehehehe.
But I'm thinking that you won't make it easy on the poor thing but I know its going to be AMAZING. ;)
So, onto Louis! I think he's taking the role as her boyfriend (Sort of) a little more seriously than Darcy is, which shows that he's not a complete cad. Until he mentions that kiss she owes him but I think he's only doing that because he just wants Darcy to like him and not run away. Perhaps you'll go into more detail about that? I think your Louis is a really interesting character and I'd love to know more about him, maybe he and Darcy will have a good conversation sometime down the line.
And that's what she's afraid of. Hahahaha.
So, what is she going to do about her parents though? D': Why do I have this horrible feeling that things will not go the way she plans and that everyone will find out about them in the worst way? Agh, I may just be hoping.hehehehehe.
Louis is making me nervous though, I hope he doesn't trick Darcy into kissing him but then again, I sort of hope he does. ;)
Anyway, I really can't wait for your next update and hope you get to it soon, this is one of my favorite stories! NO cc's or anything, it was a quick and well-written read that sadly didn't go on forever.
On my end, expect one-shots and then the eventual return of all of my stories. D': I'm being really lazy lately and haven't typed a bit!
Just for you though, I'll try to get A Force of Wills back up and going since you're the only one who really reads it. Hahahha. I do have some plans for Astoria and Blaise...mwhahaha.
Anyway, glad to be back!
Much love,

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie! It's so nice to see you back here again! I missed reading your work and getting your feedback on mine!
"the not couple" describes them perfectly! I'm going to think of that every time I write them from now on! Haha! But yeah, they are quite the pair. And Darcy is so stubborn that sometimes I just want to make have some huge realization and get past everything, but alas, she's a bit tougher to work with than that. She's going to take a lot of convincing and some obvious signs to see that she could actually get along with Louis is she really wanted to. Which would make him happy! And Lucy is still as clueless as ever about Lys, which is driving Dacry mad.
And Louis, Louis, Louis... I can tell you that there's more to him than meets the eye, which Darcy had yet to discover. He puts on a bit of a show for her, I think, because he thinks it will get her attention and impress her, so she doesn't actually know as much about him as she thinks she does. But I'll get into that later in the story!
And her parents aren't going to find out quite the way Darcy would like them to, and I can't wait to write that bit! I already know what's going to happen, and I can't say that Dee's happy about it! ;)
I'm working on the next chapter for this story and TFD, so I'm not sure which one I'll update first, but I'll let you know when I have something up! Also, I have a short one-shot called Linger that you haven't read if you want something quick! I can't wait for updates from you, either! Thank you do much for the great review! It's lovely to have you back! See you on the forums!
Cassie :)

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Review #41, by Gabriella HunterIt's Not Love: The First Official Encounter Along With Presents

9th March 2013:

Hey there, its Gabbie with your review and I'm really sorry that it took so long to get back to you, I've been very busy. But I hadn't forgotten about you or anything! ;)
So that last chapter had me thinking that Mikaela was going to confront her future husband but instead, it was only his parents! I thought that was just as nerve-wracking though and I was so uncomfortable for her during their conversation. It seems like no one really minds what's happening and I couldn't help but think she was about to explode. And then she did and it was hilarious! I have to say that one thing I really like about her is that she's not only stubborn but she's got alot of fire and I'm glad that she put in her OWN demands. That took some guts! Their reactions were great too, and it was obvious that they weren't expecting, at all. HAHAHAHA. I think that they sort of manipulated her though with all the benefits of being married to their son and that ring? I groaned a little because she just went along with it, even though I felt it was a bribe!!! >:(
Argh! What to do?!! Mikaela mentioned that people think she's an instant sounds-like-witch whenever people see her. I think alot of that has to do with her attitude, she's awfully smug sometimes! Hahaha.
I can't wait to see how she develops as a character though and I liked the happy ending to this chapter. It gave me some hope and being inside her massive closet was fun too and she's friend with a Weasley?! I didn't expect that. More interesting plot twists for me...
Anyway, this was a great read. The only CC's, I can give is that some of your bigger paragraphs could be broken up into smaller ones. :D
Thanks for the read!
Much love,

P.S.: Since I'm leaving, I'll be getting rid of my review thread. T-T I shall miss this.

Author's Response: Seee, everytime you review I smile. Its like magic.
Don't go :(
You make me smile at my own story, its amazing. I hope you come back real soon, like real real real soon.
I didn't like the idea of getting her somethingbut its pureblood background, they couldn't come empty handed. That's why. She's no way near bribery.
I will read this review again and smile.
Take care of your self, Gabbie. :( :(

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Review #42, by Gabriella HunterThe Fourth Daughter: The Slipper

9th March 2013:

Hey there! I'm really sorry that I didn't come back to this really quickly, I have been really busy with things lately. It sucks! D':
So we're back with the girls and I just love it when they go through to the pavilion. There's just something to very dreamy and lovely about the way you write it and I can't get the images of what I think it looks like from my mind. I think you use such subtle hints of imagery here and there that really capture the scope of it so well. And I don't care what anyone says, Salazar freaks me out, why do I keep getting the feeling that he's hunting Dezzy?
Perhaps I'm reading too much into it but he gives her so much attention and I know that there's something so mysterious about him but I have this feeling in my gut...
But I might just be hungry. :D
Anyway, I'd like to know more about him and Dezzy's feelings for him are growing and the way you write her attraction to him are just perfection. I mean, I sat there sighing the whole time, it was just such a great way, I love the line about her still feeling the press of his hand in her own. Gosh that was so simple but so wonderful!
But now the girls have been found out and good for Dezzy standing up to their father! I was really scared for them though and so upset that he was so cold towards her, I really can't stand it! Ugh, and Dezzy was so upset later, I hope she goes to see Godric and they have a nice long, passionate/perhaps a heavy snog/ talk. :D
I really loved this chapter and I'm sad that I won't be able to keep reading while I'll be away but I'll stop by whenever I can my dear! There was only one grammar thing, you meant to say "had" but wrote "hand" but that was the only one I spotted.
Otherwise, it was great.
Much love,

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie!
The pavilion is really fun to write because I can just dive into the descriptions of what everything looks like and how Dezzy and her sisters love it all so much. It's so different from the dreary life they live with their father that they really soak in every minute they can have being happy and free. And Salazar is really bizarre and mysterious... But it will still be a while before you find out more about him! Heeheehee.
And the girls' father is so tough for me, because sometimes I just want to make him beg for forgiveness and become an amazing father, but he's just too consumed with grief to see clearly, and realize how he's hurting his daughters.
I'm so glad that you enjoyed this chapter, because I had a ton of fun writing it!!! Thank you so much for the amazing review!
Cassie :)

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Review #43, by Gabriella HunterAgainst All Odds: The First Meeting

6th March 2013:

Ooh, now you love me forever, I'm leaving you a review! :D Its Gabbie here by the way, thought I'd stop by and plop this review on you today before I went back to typing and such myself. :D
So, I have only read a few Remus/Tonks stories so far and I really like the pair of them. Your Tonks is extremely funny and I really like her attitude, she's sort of just blowing in the breeze and taking things day by day.
I was really laughing when she kept mentioning how people kept talking about her being an Auror like it was so surprising. Hahhaa. Just cause she's clumsy doesn't mean she's not smart you know! Of course, there is a bit of mystery about the Order and I'm glad that you added that in.
Tonks meeting Remus wasn't what I expected either and I'm so relieved that you didn't go for the overblown romantic I-just-happened-to-be-gazing-at-you-longingly-from-the-other-side-of-the-room thing which would have been annoying. :p
So Remus himself is interesting but I wish I could have had more on him for a minute but I think you have alot of room to get all that done. :D
The initial Order meeting was great and I was glad to see that Tonks wasn't falling in line with it so easily and there were a few jitters. This falls in line with canon really well too, I liked Moody's mentioning of what happened in The Goblet of Fire.
Always gives me the chills! But then again, Snape was in the room...
Anyway, what I really liked about this was the details you put in with her parents and her mother's relationship with her sisters/cousins etc. I thought that added alot of depth to Tonks and that last little bit with Sirius made me sort of sad. :(
Poor him!
But anyway, on to CC's! Hm, there weren't many, just that there should be less commas in places and about a few spelling things but a quick read through will get rid of those. :D
I hope you update alot for this by the time I get back! ;)
Much love,

Author's Response: Hey Gabbie!

Yeah I've never really read that many Remus/Tonks stories, so I guess that's why I decided to write one! I'm glad that you liked Tonks, as I really do love her, and wanted to do her proud!

I guess with the Auror thing, it was the sort of the reaction I would imagine she would get, as I would probably have that thought about her as well!

Hahaha, if they saw each other like that for the first time, it just wouldn't have been realistic. Their relationship is so quirky, I guess the way they met sort of represented that!

With Remus, I didn't want him to make a big impact on Tonks, as I think their attraction for one another took longer to develop, and I wanted to show that!

I'm glad that you liked the Order meeting, and of course Tonks wouldn't fall in line, she's a little rebel in my eyes. The thing with Moody gives me the chills too, but I felt it was only right to include it!

I have edited this chapter, and the revised version is in the queue, I wanted it to be updated before you read it, but hey validators have lives too!

I hope it's updated a lot as well, and I'll look forward to your return :D


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Review #44, by Gabriella HunterMissing: Me

4th March 2013:

What on earth? I mean, I feel so awful that I hadn't attacked this alot sooner! Gah, it was simply just a mess of brilliance! I think that Charlie is personally one of the best OC's that I've read on thsi site in a long time, I absolutely love her. Her narrations are funny and realistic and I think her awkwardness is really something that anyone can relate to. Given all the weirdness in Hogwarts with Tori being missing and it adds some interesting dynamics as she tries to find a good balance.
Its unfair that everyone is judging her based on Tori not being there but I love that you put that in tehre and made sure to give little snippets of what Charlie had to go through. The fact that people are considering her a replacement and treating her badly because of it is a little much! I mean, it just makes me wonder about Tori all the more, even though I know something shady happened to her in the first place.
There's so much mystery around that and the fact that no one is really saying, save for Aine, just makes me all the more curious and eager to read Tori's POV later.
Honestly, I was sitting here enjoying Charlie's narration about fitting in with her group of friends and loving her friendship with James. Bit of oddness there too with him and Albus, I don't think its as simple as Al falling for Tori, I think it was something much darker.
And why is Albus not affected by Charlie ignoring him? Is he just odd? And why doesn't he have friends!? Strange...
Anyway, what the heck, Rebecca?! I have to say that that was just the most amazing thing ever, so much drama and Charlie-humor! Gah, I didn't think that little terror was going to attack her and gee thanks, everyone for letting her!! >:(
What is her issue? I'm keeping my eye on that little monster. But thank goodness McGonagall showed up, I hope she puts her in her place and speaking of, James and Charlie are getting closer, eh?
I'd like him to pick ME up after I've nearly been choked...
But that's not at all romantic.
So this ending just left me with more questions than anything and why are the twins so creepy? Like, really...really sort of creepy. Anyway thank you for this amazing read! :D
I really loved this and no CC's!
Stop by Abandon whenever you like!
Much love,

Author's Response: Thanks for another review and I'm so sorry for not getting back to you sooner. It's terrible, I've suddenly become so slack with review responses and I feel so bad! I blame it all on school. But anyway, here I am and I'm so happy you liked the chapter!

It makes me so happy to hear that you love Charlie, as I always enjoy writing her, and her interactions with her little group of friends she is forming, especially James. *Sigh*

Rebecca is a bit of an odd-ball, alright (then again, so is Albus at the moment) and I have to admit, that attack was kind of cool to write. She definitely did go a little psycho.

Thanks again for the review!


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Review #45, by Gabriella HunterIt's Not Love: Long Walks And Oversharing Of Tales

4th March 2013:

Hey there, sorry for being seriously late with this review, I would have attacked it sooner but I was busy and sort of lazy these past few days. Anyhoo, on to this!
I really enjoyed Mikaela in this chapter, I was really getting a good grip on who she was as a character and her thoughts were really funny and very sarcastic. Hahah. I could sense that she was afraid, truly underneath all the snark and I liked that she tried to hide it well. In regards to her not believing in love and not wanting to be vulnerable, I have a feeling that she's going to learn her lesson soon. ;)
This Nick person sounds actually pretty awesome, I really liked the backstory you gave on him. There wasn't alot to have me knowing it all but enough to get a good interest in him and wonder what sort of person he really is. So much mystery around him! And I hope he's good looking still too or Mikaela will have a fit. HAHAHA. And Scorpius? I wonder what his reaction to him will be when they meet.?
I love that build up you gave in this chapter, really good stuff!
Now, I never expected that scene with her mother at all and I loved every bit of it. Seeing her mother actually revealing a bit of her own past and the pain it had taken to lose her own love just touched me. I'm glad that she told her daugther about it though and what it might mean if she gave up on what she really wanted/needed. Oh, and the brief flashback was good, though I could have used just a tad more detail, I want to know who this mysterious Ravenclaw boy was! :D
So that ending.say what?! I think I know who's waiting for them and I love the cliff hanger you left at the end, it was a really nice touch. :D
So, as for CC's! BUM! Hahaha. Just a few grammar things that a quick read through will get rid of, other than that your pacing and detail were pretty darn good! :D
Thanks for the read!
Much love,

Author's Response: Omg
This is such a happy review.
I'm so gladdd you love thiss.
Thankyou soo muchh! Favv review!!!
I can't wait to request another onee.
I love how you love this story hehe. :P

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Review #46, by Gabriella HunterChains of Bronze: 2 Year Later

3rd March 2013:

Hey there, its Gabbie with your requested review and I'm so sorry that it took me a minute to get to it, I really am. I was really busy and trying to type and had to pause in having a hissy fit because I had writer's block. D':
Anyway, its been a while since I've read the first chapter of this story. I have to admit that it took me a moment to get back into it and remember what had happened in the first chapter. I wasn't sure where you were going for the first few paragraphs becasue I'd wanted more detail and explanations on the chapter before. But I could see the more that I read that Emyline had settled in with James but I felt that there was something you were leaving out, perhaps on purpose? How was her father dealing with this? What happened after she and James married and why did he marry her? I couldn't help but wonder about that, especially with her saying that he kept things hidden from her.
I wonder if he's involved in some shady Auror things, not really shady but maybe dangerous? Hm...Got me curious on that.
James himself was a little strange, in the sense that I couldn't really get a grip on his character, I feel like he's just one big mystery. I do like that you gave more background on Emyline though, I thought it was really great to see how close she and her mother were.
I wonder if her dream of healing will come true? With the family constantly moving and this new departure to Godric's Hollow, I can't help but wonder about this. And what are James and his parents going to say? I wonder about this! Do they know about their marriage and the kids?
I think you've got enough going on here to keep going and pulling me in different directions. :D
As for CC's, there were some grammar things, but this one is one that I think a quick proof read will get rid of. "Of course" instead of "Off course", that's the one that I noticed alot but other than that, your flow was good and I hope you hint at more to come in the next few chapters, you sort of left me on a cliffie! D':
Thanks for the read,
Gabbie. :D

Author's Response: Hey Gabbie!!

Thanks for the review!

Im really glad you liked the update! Well yes there is a lot of mystery. I was trying to maintain the present with only showing a bit of the past. We will see Daddy soon enough when he does things yet again :P

He is a mystery to Emy since she hasn't tried to actually know him. Which is why I tried to make it a mystery to the writer since well its in Emy's POV.

Glad you liked it Gabbie and thanks for reading!

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Review #47, by Gabriella HunterThe Worst: Dreading The Worst

2nd March 2013:

Its me, Gabbie with your requested review and please excuse me for not being able to read this right away and attack it properly. For the past few days I've been so annoyingly busy! D':
Anyhoo, I thought that this was a great first chapter for a new story. I was able to get the sense of desperation coming off of Dom (I shall call her that!) and was really panicking. The build up you gave and the reasoning on why she was there in the first place was smoothly done. It just made me all the more nervous though as I was able to sense that danger wasn't too far off. The fact that she was out interviewing werewolves was sort of awesome but terrifying and I'd like to know more about that. For her job, was there a real purpose for it, were they intent on making werewolf/human relationships better? Anyway, the rest of this made me tesne up because I was pretty sure that she was going to get away! But that ending, after talking about how important her family meant to her?! ARGH! What a way to do it!! I love it! :D
And here's something interesting! Dom and Teddy, eh? I didn't see that one coming but once she's bitten and changes, will he stand by her? So many questions.
Anyhoo, on to CC's! D':
I don't think there were many, just some minor spelling/grammar things and other than that, I thought your pacing and build up were great. I really like your Dom and the real fear she has of werewolves too, even though she's dating Teddy and knows about his dad. :D
So, continue on! Write more! I demand it!
Thanks for the read,
Much love,

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. I am sorry for the delay in responding!

I am pleased that you found this to be a good first chapter. Its good to know you got the desperation and liked the build up and reasoning. More on her job and interviews and such will be revealed in later chapters =) I am glad that the ending was unexpected for you, and you liked the way it was done.

Haha yes Dom and Teddy, my OTP ;) We'll know more about their relationship in the later chapters too. And of course he'll stand by her!

I'll go back and read the chapter once again to fix any spelling/grammar stuff. I am pleased you like my Dom, thank you for all your kind words!

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Review #48, by Gabriella HunterA Spoonful of Sugar: Nine

2nd March 2013:

I told you that I would stop by with your review and here I am. I thought that I would be laughing alot and its true, I was because poor Darcy is being pulled in all these directions. What's funny is that she sort of fell into her own trap by wanting to compromise with Louis and I have a feeling that its going to get kind of messy. And he's of course, taking this to his advantage and going to use it against her and make her squirm. Hehehe.
But oh, how funny is it that she kept tossing him into broom closets? Louis was killing me, nothing seems to let him down, does it? I wonder what he's really thinking sometimes and if the Towel Incident is really that much of a deal. To Darcy of course it is but I wonder what's going to happen if someone DOES find out? Hahahhaa.
Or is something going to happen thats worse than that?! Ah, I would like to know.
But anyway, I really loved this! I'm wondering,with all the Darcy/Louis action if Lys and Lucy are going to somehow be together. I'm rooting for that! :D
As for that ending, well, I'm getting the feeling its not going to go well for Darcy in the next chapter. Hahaha.
I really can't wait!
I loved it to bits of course! :) On my end, expect A Force of Blaise and then, perhaps Albus, Abandon and then Audrey. Triple A's! Hahahhaa.
Anyhoo, thanks for the great read!
Much love,

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie! It's so lovely to see you back again!
Poor Darcy, indeed! She really doesn't know when to stop herself sometimes, and is so stubborn that she can't see that sacrificing a little bit of her integrity might actually pay off in the end! Instead she decides to date the boy that gets on her nerves more than anyone in the world! Haha.
Louis is more complicated than meets the eye, and I'm really going to delve into his character more now that he and Darcy are going to be spending a lot more time together, and she's going to get to know him better.
And as for Lys and Lucy... You'll just have to wait and see! Haha.
I can't wait for more updates from you, and I promise to keep you in the loop with Holding On! Thank you so much for the awesome review!!!
Cassie :)

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Review #49, by Gabriella HunterSnake Bites: The Borthwick Ward

27th February 2013:

Hey there, you! I'm really sorry that its taken me so long to get back to you, I've been annoyingly busy and trying to update all my stories before I head out for basic. :p
Anyway, so we're back to the boys! I think Nathan held his own very well against that masked fiend but its horrible that Charlie got hit--and what's this about magical imprint? That something I've never heard before but its very interesting, I can't wait to see what else you do with that.
Anyhoo, the boys were taken to St. Mungo's, and Greg is doing all that he can but I can tell that he wishes he can do alot more. I'm really eager to see what you do with this and the mysterious people that have been causing so many problems. What's really making me worry is that there are obviously more of them out there and I'm wondering what they're going to do now that one of their own is missing/captured/interrogated by Aurors.
I really can't wait to see how that goes, actually, there are bound to be some great answers and more mystery thrown in.
On another note, it seems like Rose is the most unlikeable person on the face of the earth. I really wish that she would get over herself for a minute! And how are the adults not noticing this?!
What I did find surprising was that Ginny didn't go to St. Mungo's/Burrow with Albus after what he had told her had happened. But I think he was in a hurry and from that ending, Harry is about to show up! And I think the story is going to go in a really complex and wonderful turn! :D
Can't wait for your next update!
On my end, there are like, three chapters for the Misfits if you're still reading it. And...I'm getting there...I'm getting to the important bits. D':
Much love,

Author's Response: Don't think I'm in a position to complain about slow reviewing times... I've barely had a free minute and am counting down to the Easter holidays with quite indecent enthusiasm.

I promise that I shall get around to reviewing the misfits, but right now I'm so busy that I'm breaking my one golden rule about work and that's working after I leave the office at night... I'm knackered, and I want to read when I'm relaxed enough to enjoy it at my own pace!!

Seven days to go...


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Review #50, by Gabriella HunterIt's Not Love: A Father Who Cares And A Long Drive Into The Rain

27th February 2013:

Hey there, its Gabbie with your requested review and once again, my apologies for not immediately attacking it. So, the beginning of this chapter was interesting, it was nice getting into Draco's mind and seeing how he thinks about everything. I sort of wanted a bit more of a personal backstory with him, perhaps talking a bit more about his feelings for his wife. From what I could gather, aside from that hug, they don't seem all that close and I was wondering if that was just how you wrote it or if I had read it wrong. On other things, I can sense his worry for his daughter really well but I wonder how he and Scorpius are going to get along now? Is something really major going to happen between them? Sort of got me worried.
With Mikeala's thoughts later on in the chapter, I liked that she was trying to get away and thinking at the same time. It seems like being busy helps her out more than anything and I enjoyed how her thoughts kept bouncing around. She was weighing her options and in the end, she decided that she had really no chance of abandoning her family. No matter that she was saying her family name meant alot to her, I couldn't really see if she was nice, mean or anti-social. I'm not sure about that with her, to be honest! D':
But now she's stranded in the middle of nowhere but perhaps she'll get some help from that old couple? Hahaah. I hope so and I can't wait to see what happens later on!
As for CC's, I think this chapter was pretty okay when it came to grammar and all that. Some sentences could be smoother but the flow was good and your story is shaping up pretty nicely. :)
Thanks for the read!
Much love,

Author's Response: Heyy there,
You give me such happy reviews. The length of them always melts me away. :')
I am so glad that you liked this better.
Draco and Astoria have a very different sort of relationship.Its the kind you expect from Draco, given his past. Mikaela is like him, you will see through the characters in a while.
Wow, you really are getting to know the character of Mikaela.
And the mystery relationship of Scorpius and Draco shall be saved for later.
I have to keep some attraction of awesome people like you to read my story.
I can't wait to re request another review from you.

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