Reading Reviews From Member: Gabriella Hunter
  
774 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Gabriella HunterSweethearts: Shatter

2nd September 2015:
HEllO!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with your review! I thought that I would be the first to review this for you since it's super new and has that great fresh story smell. :D

So, Sirius! I honestly love reading anything about him but what I like here was that you switched it from just being his story. I feel like that helped me to understand nad love his character more through Marlene's eyes. I think it's also important to remember that you can write about love and tragedy but not be too overwhelming with each. I feel like some authors get a little too angsty (Not that I can talk) and it takes away from the romance that they're trying to portray. I could tell from the beginning that it was going to be something special and I really love the breaks that you added to.

Childhood to adulthood wasn't just covered by the usual array of flashbacks but you put in valuable information. We all know that Marlene's attack was horrible from the HP books but we get so much more depth from that and her friendship with the others. I wasn't happy about that ending, though. It tugged at my poor heart. I just had this awful feeling and because I remembered her name from the books, I had hoped you would stray from canon and magically have her marrying Sirius under a rainbow.

That didn't happen of course but I think the ending of this is so powerful. We're dropped right into Sirius's mind and I can feel his heartache, which is so poignant and made so much clearer just by his silence. Really powerful writing! :D

I think I spotted one or two spelling things but otherwise, you're all good. :D

Much love,

Gabbie

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Review #2, by Gabriella HunterFirst Hand Experience: Prologue: Tough Decisions

30th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums with your review and you should know me pretty well by now. I thought that I would stop by this story before checking anything else out, you've got a lot of new stuff on here! I'm so excited!

I don't read enough stories about Aurors. I think that they have a tough job and are pretty fantastic but I hardly read any stories about them for some reason. I like the start of this story though because you don't exactly say what's going on or why that group of Aurors has gone missing. Were they kidnapped? Killed? Is there a crazy witch/wizard out there starting up trouble? There are so many mysteries here that I think you can build up on but for now, we're left with this ominous sense of urgency.

Kinglsey of course is trying to do his job and get things on track, all while having that pressure on his back. I've never written him before but I love your take on him and I'm eager to know more about the characters that you've introduced too. Harry, Ron and Seamus sound like a great addition to the mission but they're still pretty fresh. They've got the experience though, considering what they went through and I'm super curious to know what happens next! :D

Thanks for the read!

Much love,

Gabbie

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Review #3, by Gabriella HunterAlmost: Almost

30th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums with your review, I'm sorry that this is late! Thank you for the wonderful review for "Again". It really brightened my day!

I always love flashbacks in stories too and I think it's a great way to show just how damaging being in Azkaban can be for a person, especially after a few years. I think that Sirius was such an active person before he was put there and to think that he's been trapped without any hope just makes the memories you included all the more bittersweet. What I really loved was the very beginning, which is just a perfect tie-in to canon, you can obviously see where the story will continue in the HP book. Sirius may not have known what he would see in the newspaper but it inspired him to get justice, which makes the first flashback about Lily just the more poignant. It was clear then that he loved her and over time, that love grew into something more. What I would like to know is what happened in between that and why nothing ever happened between them! Maybe that's in an actual novel? Hm...

The most heartbreaking part of this of course was the flashback with Sirius being completely alone. There were great nods to canon there too but to think of him sitting there, knowing that his two friends were gone was just some powerful writing. :D

Anyway, I especially loved the fire that Sirius had towards the very end. He was going to get his revenge and he was going to make sure that Peter suffered for it. That was something that's going to stay with me. :D

Thanks for the read!

Much love,

Gabbie

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Review #4, by Gabriella HunterPride and Scorpius: Well met on the Hogwarts Express

28th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums with your review and I'm so sorry for the lateness! I thought that I would be able to get to this sooner but real life was a pain for the few days. >:(

So, I don't read a lot of this pairing. It's not because I don't like it or anything but I find it hard to get into them because they all sort of have the same theme. Rose hates Malfoy/Rose is Malfoy's best friend/Scorpius is sex god or jerk/Rose eventually finds his soft side and they fall in love.

I've seen half a dozen of those on the archives and it's great to see something different. What I enjoyed here was that you really give Rose her own voice, she's an eleven year old girl and you didn't write her as if she were a twenty-something trapped in a younger girls body. In other words, she acts her age and that's always a great way to not only set up your world, but helps the reader appreciate how much she'll grew later. I like the fact that you have her wanting to prove herself, I figure that being in such a large family can make it hard to stand out sometimes. There are a lot of stories that have her being friends with Albus too, I love seeing them together. I honestly really like her Albus too, he seems like a pretty confident kid! He's kind and even a bit silly, which is a nice way to balance out the way you've written Scorpius. I don't think I've EVER seen anyone write him this way! Scorpius Malfoy crying and cowering? That's new. I LOVE that you have him so nervous about where he belongs too and through his dialogue, we learn that Harry's animosity towards Malfoy faded over time. That shows maturity and reflects amazingly on how Harry raised his children, though I'm not quite sure about Ron. I think it's a little upsetting that he would refer to their financial situation as something to compare with the Malfoy's. It's actually something that I don't think would be out of the ordinary for Ron but it made me frown a little nonetheless. Rose's innocence over the whole thing though was realistic and I'm curious to know what's going to happen, especially with how her father has always bad mouthed the Malfoy's.

The ending has me curious too. So, there are goblins that go to Hogwarts? That's SOOO interesting! I have never heard of that before and it's such a neat detail, it really shows how much the world has changed in twenty years so I'm eager to find out what happens next. :D

There were a few grammar things but nothing that you should freak out over. :D

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Oh hey! If this is the quality of your reviews then I should stalk your review offered thread more often and don't apologise for the delay, if this is what I am to expect. It's a great review and just what I wanted, someone from outside the particular liking for the pairing to cast a critical eye over it.

Yes, even though I do like Scorose in all it's permutations, I knew that I couldn't bring anything new to the table, pairing wise, that other people hadn't done before and probably better. So I wanted to bring new aspects to their world and enrich what was happening around them and too them.

Thank you so much, I always fear that I am writing Rose too old - I probably am, but I hope that I alleviate it with instances of her acting her age. My take on her at the moment is as a smart precocious girl, who is ahead of her years in some respects, but in others (especially emotional and worldly ones) is decidedly behind. She will grow, just like Lizzy and Darcy (especially Darcy, whom she is the most like in some respects at this stage of her story) did over the course of P&P. About proving herself and standing out from the rest of her family ... well we will just have to see if that is some of her motivation, shan't we.

Albus, I like him too. Before I came to these archives I hadn't had much to do with him before, nor thought over-much about him, but his character (as developed by my fellow fan-fictioneers) was a delightful find. Albus will be the emotional heart of this story and as such will play a large part in it.

There is such a range of character that we can play with when we consider the nature of Scorpius Malfoy. Some of it comes down to what the character of his father became after the war. I have always felt that a Scorpius that deserves the love of Rose has to be so either because of his father or inspite of him. His upbringing has not been a particularly happy one, nor has it been awful either, but he knows going into school the reception he is likely to get and he dreads it. He has been largely friendless in his eleven years on this earth and it shows. He has every bit as much growing to do as does Rose, and we shall see it happen over the years to come.

Not knowing the name of Malfoy was a bit of a stretch, I admit, but it was worth the attempt as to what it reveals of the character of Albus and especially his father. Harry I thought was always the sort to forgive and forget. As to Ron, he has forgiven too he truly has, but I think it would be much harder for him to forget. But also I don't think that his comparisons of his situation with that of Draco, were done with nasty intent. No, he was always one to find the humour in a situation, he used references to Malfoy in a joking way, not realising that his impressionable daughter was listening in the whole time. So he didn't bad-mouth them as such, not with any deliberate meanness of intent, but a young girl might not exactly have the most worldly experience to discern the difference. Rose though is fairer than that, she will make up her mind about Scorpius on her own terms. It's a pity then that he presents such an unusual picture to her that her first impressions are not so good.

The goblins going to Hogwarts are just another peculiar wrinkle that I want to put into this world. I always thought that there were probably the same percentage of goblins who could do magic as there were humans, it's just that a prejudiced Ministry had prevented them from coming in the past. That is until the events outlined in my other story occurred, and Harry's actions to right the wrong done to them.

Thanks for the wonderful review, I really do appreciate it. As of this response, the story has had 2938 views and this chapter has had 638, thank you all.

Andrew,
Oldershouldknowbetter.




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Review #5, by Gabriella HunterForgetting: Exquisite

28th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with a review for you! I don't think that we've swapped or anything in quite a while so it's nice reading some of your work again!

Man, what a twist! I didn't expect that ending at all. I know that this for a challenge but wow, I really wish that this had been longer so I could really soak in Rose's mind. I am blown away by the fact that not only does Rose go through the memories of falling in love with her best friend, she also leads the reader into thinking that she's called Scorpius over to apologize. I get the sense through the entire chapter that they're about to come to grips with how they feel. The paragraphs are short but they're full of intensity and really bring a lot of depth to the story. By the end, my jaw had dropped and I just...I just can't believe she did it! WHY?! I would seriously love another chapter for this, you can't leave me hanging! Haha.

Great work!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hey! This review was a very pleasant surprise so thank you so much. I'm glad the ending caught you by surprise xD I am afraid this was only a one-shot so there won't be anything more but if inspiration strikes, I might do a sequel!

Yes the main aim was to mislead, to make it look like they're going to have a happy reunion (or something like that) but then things take a dark turn! I'm glad all of that came across. As to the way, well she did it because 1) she has gone quite insane 2) Rose Weasley cannot handle rejection 3) Rose is insane xP

Thanks!


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Review #6, by Gabriella HunterFive of a Kind: Introduction - Dealer's Choice

28th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with your review for our swap! I am really sorry that I don't have anymore Blastoria for you but I've been going through a tough time and it's been hard to write anything. I do have half the chapter done though, I just need to finish it so hopefully you'll see it soon! Thank you so much for agreeing to do this swap with me, I really appreciate it.

I had a difficult time with your AP. There were so many interesting stories that it was tough picking just one to read and I might be back at some point to check them out. :D This one sounded pretty unique though, I'm curious to see what this is going to be about. I'm totally getting Breakfast Club vibes and I am already down for that. Hahaha.

Cormac doesn't seem like the sort of person that would enjoy being a teacher. What class does he teach? Haha. I can't picture him enjoying his job but I like that we get great clues to his personality. Apparently, he loathes children and is more interested in flirting than being bothered but I think that was pretty realistic. I thought it was great that you had him like this, we all know that there are quite a few teachers who hate kids or at least, their jobs.

I'm really eager to find out about this assignment that the students are getting and about the detention group as well. What on earth happened to one of the Potter boys and Malfoy? I wonder why there are so many Weasley's in detention too, since it seems like a pretty rare thing. Haha. I may just hop on over here again soon! This sounds like it's going to be a great read!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hi! And it's okay there's no more Blastoria at the moment, it gives me the chance to start something else. I've had the same issue when it comes to writing of late, it's like I don't even know what I'm doing anymore when I open a document and try to put some words down. And lol, feel free to come back if you ever want to read anything or do a swap.

Yes, I don't actually say it in this intro, but I do mention in the Author's Note of the next chapter that this is very much based off of The Breakfast Club, so your vibes are very on point.

I think Cormac is going to be that teacher everyone hates. I don't even know what he teaches yet, I don't even know what he's good at. I thought maybe being the flying instructor but I don't know. I need to research him and figure him out a bit. Yes, he's definitely a bit of a tool in this story, more interested in hooking up than his students. I'm glad that you like him like this those, I actually wrote this bit on a whim basically, when I was still using an OC as the teacher in this story, and when I wrote that out it just did not feel right anymore with him being an OC, I'd been doubting it for a while to be honest, and I asked myself, who in cannon would this personality fit? And who might have a grudge against some of my characters? And I instantly thought of Cormac and put him in there, and he just fit so perfectly in my mind, so I'm glad other people think so, too.

Haha, some of your questions will be answered in the next chapter, and others will be answered throughout the story. I wouldn't say there are "so many" Weasleys in detention, but there's more than one, and that may seem like a lot simply because it's such a small group of students... I wouldn't say it's rare though but it is with these particular students... Okay, not giving any more info away! lol. I do hope you check out the next chapter soon, I'd love to know your thoughts on it!

Thanks for swap and this lovely review!

xxNix


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Review #7, by Gabriella HunterThe memories in your biscuits: The memories in your biscuits

28th August 2015:
HellO!

This is Gabbie from the forums stopping by with our swap! I'm sorry that it took a minute for me to get to this but I'm here now! :D

I don't think I've ever read a story about Professor McGonagall. I think that it's a bit of a shame when she's such a great character, she's a fierce, loyal woman and has seen a lot in her life. I really loved the fact that we see everything through her eyes and begin to understand who she is as a person. The span of time though was a bit confusing and I didn't quite get the flashbacks at first. I thought that they disrupted what you were trying to focus on but I eventually didn't notice. I like, though that she remembers various moments from her childhood up until the end. Sirius, James and Peter running through her mind shows that she cared about each of them in her own way and I thought it was a great way to say just how much she had really seen and lost during her lifetime. I thought the section with Remus was especially well written and I think that the moment when she learned to back was just wonderful. There was a lot of heart written in that portion of the story and I think that you painted her life very well.

Thanks for the read!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hey, Gabbie!
Oh, don't worry, you're not late at all!

Honestly, I don't think I'd ever dared writing a story centered on McGonagall if I wasn't assigned her character for the challenge. I do agree with you that she's an amazing character and that it would be awesome to her more in fics! And I'm very glad that you think I did her justice!!!

Erm... I know... You aren't the first to tell me the flashbacks were a bit confusing... When I typed the story I wrote them in italic and I suppose it worked better that way, but at the same time I feared it would be disturbing to see long paragraphs in italic so I just used asterisks. I probably should try to work out a better way to manage the flashbacks, or at least put an AN at the beginning that explains it... I'll think about it! :)

I really believe Minerva cared a lot about all her students, and I believe the Marauders would have a special place in her heart, being so brilliant and charismatic and having fought in the war with her. She did see and lose a lot!!!

Thank you so much for the amazing review!!!
Much love!
Chiara


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Review #8, by Gabriella HunterDevlin Potter: Riddle and Rescue: Professor for a Day

22nd August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with your review and its been so long! I haven't stopped by this story in ages and it's great to be reading it again! I never really forgot this story, since it's one of the most unique tales on the archives. Remember how you said you felt about Audrey Tang? Well, I felt the same about this. :D

So, it seems like Devlin is continually changing. I really like this angle of him though, he's not quite sure who he is at some moments but he's so sure of what he's been taught. I thought it was an interesting contrast with him meeting Dumbledore and the lack of awe and fear that comes along with it. I don't know if I would have been bold enough to ignore anything that the Headmaster said but it was clear that Devlin THINKS that he knows everything about a person just from first glance and that is a bit arrogant on his part, I think. He should be more careful about that but what I liked was that he held onto Harry's hand and kept close to his side. I would want them to get closer, of course but I think that there are still plenty of barriers between them, though Harry is still determined to look at him as his son and not the clever, broken thing that he is. Devlin is once more just as complicated, devious and fascinating as the last time that I read this and I'm blown away by your writing.

I think that you've created this dark, twisted universe with some elements that we all recognize and even adore. You break some down and give me something even better in return--the entire scene with the Unforgivable Curses was a great example. I don't think Devlin truly understood the depths to how evil they were until he saw them being used, I believe that he'll be thinking of that rat for quite some time and his peculiar fear of crowds.

It was great coming back to this and thanks so much for the read! :D

Much love,

Gabbie

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Review #9, by Gabriella HunterVictoire: Uncle Harry's Warning

17th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with your review and what a nice surprise! I haven't heard from you in a while and it's great to be reading your work again. Be sure to stop by my page at some point so we can squeal properly at one another, eh?

So, this! I really, really love the Victoire that you've crafted here. The univesre that you've built is detailed, rich and dark but I feel like that's only to be expected. It's something that a lot of Next Generation stories kind of gloss over, the actual affects of what would happen to the people who survived and their children. I think that it was tragic to know what happened to the Montgomery's though and I wonder how this all ties in together with Greyback--I have a hunch but I'm not quite sure if it'll be true. I know that the beast probably had followers but why now? Why after all this time? I thought that, including the awful letter that Victoire found were great tie-ins to the mystery that you've created.

The fact that someone would really take the time to do this just horrifies me. I wonder what the connection between the murderer is to Greyback and the victims? We all know how Teddy and Victoire are connected through their fathers (I like how you had this connection here but haven't at all included a romantic element between them) but who else might become a victim? I think that this goes deeper than what we see here and I'm curious to know what you'll do later on. :D

I also hve to say that I really love this studious, polite and thoughtful Victoire. It's such a nice change from the ones that I encounter on the archives. She's serious about her studies, is empathetic to the people around her and values her friendships. I would love to see more of her development too, though I thought the lat line was fantastic. You had already had Victoire being guilty for thinking of Izzy and the death of her family in a political way (Nice cameo from Hermione and Lee here, broadens the world a bit with the information you gave) but the line about Cedric and Bertha Jorkins kind of put that back into focus. Maybe that was just me who noticed? Hm...

Anyway, great second chapter and thanks for the read!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Gabbie! Thank youu for such a lovely review. I definitely need to get back to your page some time soon :)

I'm so so glad you like my Victoire. She's a bit different from the characters I've written in Complicated and I'm really enjoying her. The links with Greyback will (hopefully!) become clearer later on.

I wanted to write Victoire in a way that shows she's Bill and Fleur's daughter. Fleur was a Triwizard Champion and they were both members of the Order, so I thought their eldest daughter should have some substance. I really hope that comes across as the story progresses.

Thanks for all the lovely feedback! Emma x


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Review #10, by Gabriella HunterKeep Calm and Carry On: A Guide to Keeping Calm and Coffee Stains

17th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums here with your review and it's great to meet you. I'm so sorry that this was late though, I was really busy this past week or two. :(

So, I think I might be in love with this. I really love the idea that you have here and I was sold from the very first line. Hahah. I always love a story that isn't afraid to have their main characters go through normal, every day things like everyone else. Raining, spilled coffee, hot girl not noticing you when you're staring at her hair, that sort of thing is totally normal. And let me just say that Lorcan's entire POV is filled with so much personality! He's funny, sarcastic, a tad cynical and hopeful all at once. He seems like a real young man and his struggles of growing up and wanting to do so much more with his life are spot on.

I think that I was really impressed with how you handled his interest in politics. It's really not something that you would expect from Luna's son but you have opened my eyes to how wonderful fan fics can be. We don't know anything about her children and to think that of them stepping away from the "oddity" of their parents is really fascinating. I'd always liked that idea of pushing characters out of the norm but I love that Lorcan is having such difficult time. It sounds like a weird thing to say but we all seem to be struggling with the things we love the most--not to mention the fact that he knocked his boss out at the very end of this. Hahahaha.

I loved this chapter and all of the secondary characters your introduced, plus your history and details were great! :D

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hey Gabbie! Thanks for dropping by! No worries about the delay. I know how it is. :)

I'm glad you liked this story so much!! :D Lorcan is definitely a funny character and I'm glad you think he reads as realistic! Some of his character is based on my own experiences as being a generally clumsy/unlucky person so I wanted to channel that into him. I'm excited you thought it came off well! :D

I've never written a Next Gen canon character who's not a Wotter, so I'm having a lot of fun figuring out what Luna would be like as a parent! I think Lorcan is a little bit more like her than he realizes, but is like 8000 times more grounded than her! Anyway, I'm glad you're liking his interests and character!

Thanks so much for your praise! I'm so excited to hear that you liked it. :)

--J


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Review #11, by Gabriella HunterFalling Rose Petals: Prologue

17th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums with your review and I'm sorry for the lateness! I was really busy this past week. I wasn't even able to look at my laptop without being yanked away from it and also, it's nice to meet you! :D

So, I get the feeling that Scott is hiding a lot of his past from Rose. I'm not quite sure why though but I like that you started this chapter out from her POV, the day apparently being serene and wonderful a great contrast for what happened later. I'm really curious to know more about the couple themselves though, I feel like this was a little too short on those kind of details. I would have liked a bit more of Rose's personality, the children and Scott to make them all the more real. I am a bit worried though about his reaction to the news about Hogwarts though, I also can't believe that he would hide something like this from his wife.

Rose mentioned something about the two of them having trust issues from previous relationships and I am interested in learning more. Was Scott married before? What kind of other secrets is he hiding? How did these two meet? I would love to know but because this is a prologue, I felt like you slowly built up to what the actual story will be, which is just wonderful.

Aside from what I mentioned, there were some small grammar problems but nothing to feel stressed about. Feel free to re-request the second chapter!

Thanks for the read!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie!

Thanks so much for your awesome review. Please don't worry about the timing -I completely understand real life!

Yes, there are quite a few secrets that Scott has been keeping from his wife. The reasoning behind his behavior will become clearer throughout the story.

I'm sorry you felt the personalities were a bit lacking - I wanted to keep the prologue short and sweet and a bit high level, but the future chapters really get into their personalities. I've also just had the story beta'd, so I will be making some edits shortly.

Thank you again for the review :)
LJ


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Review #12, by Gabriella HunterHair Brained Schemes: The biggest hair brained schemes

17th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with a really late review for our swap a few days ago. I thought that I would hop on over to this story since it's George/Angelina, a pairing that we don't see very often on the archives and it's always great reading different versions of characters that you've written. Hehe.

Now, I really like the fact taht you managed to balance out more than one challenge. That's amazing! I don't think that I would be able to do it, personally. It feels like something that takes a lot of time and hard work--I always end up procrastinating too much. Hahahah. So, I really like the fact that you used 30 Seconds to Mar's The Kill for this too, it's one of my favorite songs of all time and to see it being weaved through this chapter was great. I thought it gave the story more depth too and I was able to feel George and Angelina's feeling more clearly.

I felt that you wrote the two of them and their varying POVs well. Angelina has never really been written as the emotional type but I liked seeing her like this and I also loved the image of her and George watching the fireworks together, having the same realization about Fred to keep going. Now, the ending suggested that there are still plenty of things that George needs to sort through but I think that they'll work it out together. :D

I have no Cc's really so thanks for the read and leaving me that great review for "That Night!"

Much love

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hi!
I'm really glad you liked it. The song was perfect wasn't it? :)
It was a little difficult to incorporate the 2 prompts, but I saw them at the same time, got a plunny, and off I went!
I felt like I had to end it by making sure ppl knew that it wasn't solved, they're both still going to grieve for a really long time, but at least they'll have each other.
I include more of A/G in my novel too, it's written from multiple POV's, which I was nervous about, but people seem to like it, so I'll probably keep it that way. It's in the middle of lots of editing though lol. Still, decent if you're curious.

Thanks for the review, you're story was awesome too :)


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Review #13, by Gabriella HunterDragged Under: A jump back

17th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with a really late review for our swap. I'm so sorry that it took so long! I hadn't planned on real life getting the best of me like this!

So, I am really curious about the story that you have here. I'm not quite sure what's happening or where you're going with this but I really loved the beginning. You feel two people connected so strongly but there's a real sense of urgency between them--is it telepathy? I'm assuming that they have some kind of connection that isn't normal from the way you've described those scenes, especially the drowning. I am really fascinated by this idea because I don't think that I've seen it before and I'd really love to know more about it. I am guessing that the entire thing though is centered around Regulus's betrayal of Voldemort and his eventual death. Very dark way to open up a chapter and I love that you didn't immediately hint as to what was going on, we're thrust right into the story without explanation. I thought that was brilliant! :D

Now, I'm not so sure about the second half. I know that the first part is most likely the end of the story or perhaps the future but I thought the second part kind of threw me off a little. I was already enveloped in the world you were just beginning to create and I wasn't sure if I liked being pulled out of it. Now, I do like the thought of this confident Regulus though and I'm curious to know how his relationships will play out too, I wonder if he'll shift into a different person towards the end? He seems controlled and happy here, I'm eager to know more about him. :D

Thanks for the read!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hi Gabbi thank you so much for the review ^^

I think the story is meant to throw you back a little, it was actually the point. I started with the issue: it was all dark and there was no joy in the events. But then I took a step back so that you know that it was good times before it became dark.

I guess when the story evolves more readers will understand what I'm trying to do exactly ^^

I hope you'll be back for more

Doe


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Review #14, by Gabriella HunterSea of Love: I

11th August 2015:
Hello!

*Swaggers onto the review like a boss* It's great reading something fresh from you! I know that there are a ton of your other stories that i Need to get caught up on but for now, I'm all about the fluffy goodness that is this first chapter. I really like that you don't weight down the entire thing with how different Scorpius and Rose are. I think that a lot of Scor/Rose stories fail because that's the MAIN thing keeping the story going and it's great to just see them being a normal, happy couple.

I also like the fact that Scorpius is a Healer at St. Mungo's! How great is that? I never would have picked that career out for him and I like that you have him very dedicated to his job. I was touched by his concern for Mary too and the party that Rose had for him was just really great! It was sweet and touching and just a tad heartbreaking because we all know that there's only so much that Scorpius can do for the kids. BUT, you get this wonderful bit of hope that things might get better, which is always lovely. :D

Thanks for the read!

Much love,

Gabbie

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Review #15, by Gabriella HunterThe Dirigible Plum Disaster: The Dirigible Plum Disaster

9th August 2015:
HELLO!

This is Gabbie dropping by with our swap! I wanted to make sure that I got here quickly too because I never seem to anymore. Hahahah. It's pretty late though but the day just crept by without me wanting it to. Hahahaha.

Anyway, this was so adorable. I strangely like the idea of Hugo being obsessed with plants and the fact that he treasures them so deeply. I love your characterization of him too and Finn is just the cutest person ever. It was funny how desperate he was to watch Tony and how he was trying to prove himself--I had a feeling that he may have been trying to impress Hugo with how responsible he could be. Hahaha. I thought that was pretty cute and the fact that things escalated so quickly with Tony dying just...I couldn't stop laughing Finn's POV.

Can humans smell fear? That was just pure gold.

I wasn't sure what was going to happen to the couple though! I thought that they were going to break up but then that ending happened and I was so relieved. What I LOVED the most was the fact that Finn gave Hugo another Dirigible plum that grew (Was it a metaphor for love itself?) well with the two of them there to take care of it.

Ah, the sweetness.

I would totally love more of this too, by the way. Let me know if you decide to make this into a short story or something!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie!
This was so much fun for me to write. I'd never written Hugo before, but I really love him now that I've explored his character a little bit. Also, Finn was so much fun. I think he's one of my favorite OC's that I've written.
Haha the part when Finn talks about humans smelling fear was one of my favorite bits to write, and almost everyone who's read this story comments on it! I think he just lets thoughts run away from him when he gets nervous, and gets on some pretty crazy trains of thought.
Of course I had to put in a cute make-up scene! I don't think I could bear to break them up!
I'm actually working on another Hugo/Finn one-shot (set while they're seventh years at Hogwarts), so I'll let you know when that's up!
Thank you for the review!
Cassie :)


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Review #16, by Gabriella HunterGame Over: One

9th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums with our swap and I am totally not late for once! I never thought that it would happen...but here I am. Hahahah.

I thought that I would try reading something different of yours and give the Bunny a break for a minute. I was curious about this piece because it was short story that has six different POVs? I like the idea of an entire story being told by a few different people so I'm going to just read a few and see what's going on.

I really like that you don't give any kind of information about what's going on. I get the sense that James is into something pretty serious though, is he a spy? What on earth happened the night before?

I was totally reminded of some old James Bond films too but I'm not sure if this is going to go in that same direction. You slyly build up this world but you don't give away too much about it and that ending! What on earth is going on? James apparently hasn't been doing his job very well, from what he was saying in the beginning and now he might not make it out alive! Eh?! What?! I'll be back! I need to know more about what's going on and you're very mean for making this chapter so short!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie!

Actually, this story was limited to 500 words per chapter exactly. It has nothing to do with POV, but I do switch here and there. But yes, it is completely different from the rabbit story. :)

The format doesn't allow for anything but the immediate story. I didn't have enough words for backstory or any extras.

Haha, I'm glad you were reminded of James Bond stuff. I didn't copy plots, but I did try to capture the flavor of a spy story. Please do come back. The chapters are short.

Thanks for the review!

Pix


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Review #17, by Gabriella HunterThe Forest: Run

9th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie dropping by for our swap and its been a while! What's up with that? You have all of these lovely stories for me to read and I had no idea! Tsk, tsk.

So, this was lovely! I never get to read many stories that feature Dean. It's a real shame because I always liked his character and figured that his adventures away from Hogwarts during the War were just as dangerous as what Harry went through. I honestly thought that it would have been great to learn more about this in a short story but the lovely JK didn't do that. This of course is a great little peek into what Dean wen through and I feel so sad that it's not very long. I got the sense of dread, panic and hope during the entire story, you get the feeling that Dean has seen and felt too much.

I liked the opening of this story too, it was great to see that Dean had that one little bright spot in his memory. His grandmother's house, just imagining was enough to put his mind at ease but what struck me was the fact that having Seamus's letter as physical proof that he was loved was just perfection. I always enjoy the little bits of canon that you put into your stories and having Dean's POV on what happened to Teddy and Dirk was almost too much for me. What made me tense up though was the ending...we know that Dean makes it out of this alive but ah, that ending makes me tense! I totally wanted more!

Much love,

Gabbie

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Review #18, by Gabriella HunterAll the truth about Jimmy Portman: Brooms and troubles

9th August 2015:
Hello!

I'm back for our second swap! I really wanted to make it up to you for being so late the last time so I hopped right onto this one! ;D

So, it seems like Jimmy is having some problems with Neville. I really like the idea that you have here with their friendship, it certainly isn't perfect but on some level, you can see the potential in it. Jimmy is a pretty honest kid and I like that he's able to look at things so objectively, although I do hope that he'll stop being angry with his father soon, especially with what happened in the last chapter. I think that Neville did have a point about making up with him and while it was awful, Jimmy's thoughts about the entire process were pretty realistic. I mean, we all have had that moment when we're not interested in anyone's advice and could hardly care what they think--those thoughts aren't always the kindest either.

I also like here that Neville and Jimmy clashed a bit and later on, made up in a way that showed just how strong their relationship could be. Now, there are some moments while reading that seem straight out of the HP book and I like that you twisted things up a bit (The duel, for one thing) and I enjoyed seeing things taken in a different direction, my advice would just to be careful not to get too carried away with that though. I think your story is shining through well enough without all of that. ;)

Oh, another thing! I like the fact that Neville has all of these contrasting parts of his character. He's got strong magic but is too hard on himself, which makes it difficult for him to really shine. I like that you showed him being more vulnerable too while he spoke with Jimmy and then sitting and reading Muggle novels without a care in the world. It showed that he didn't live his life by what the other Slytherins expected out of him and I'd love to see more of that. :D

Thanks for the read!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Welcome back, honey!

I'm happy you're liking Jimmy and Neville! Everything you said rreflecs exactly what I was imagining about them and their friendship!

Jimmy will forgive his father, but it'll require him some time. As you must've noticed, he has some good qualities but he has his flaws, too, one of them being able to hold a grudge for quite a bit!

One of the most difficult things in this story is keeping the balance between what I think should happen just like in canon (because there's no reason it would happen differently) and what instead should change, all the time trying not to copy too much from the books... It's incredibly hard... Hope it turned out quite alright so far!

Neville is a complex character. He has so much potential in so many ways but he is unable to see it. Jimmy's friendship will be a great motivator for him, though. He might become much more confident and strong later on!

Thank you so much for your praises, I'm just so thrilled that you are enjoying this story so much, also because I have conflicting feelings towards it at times...

Thank you for the swap and a huge hug!
Chiara


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Review #19, by Gabriella HunterAll the truth about Jimmy Portman: Chance meeting in Diagon Alley

9th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with our swap, I am so sorry that this took so long. I've been ridiculously busy and couldn't get around to reviewing or swapping the way I wanted and it was a major pain.

So, we learned something really important in this chapter. I'm really curious and impressed by what you've done here, this certainly isn't scenario that I've seen before. Peter Pettigrew raising a child? That's not something we would have ever thought him capable of before and I'm really stunned by the fact that you were able to make him so human. I know that he isn't anyone's favorite character but I'm impressed by how you've broken him down and made him into a person that's just trying to do the right thing. I don't know what might happen in the end but I understand where he was trying to go and why.

I will honestly admit that I was a little confused by the beginning of this chapter. I think that you might need to add a it more details into the setting and pace yourself a bit more because it felt like we were leaping into a completely different story for a minute.

Aside from that, I was interested in seeing Sirius and the others again. It seems like their lives have taken a different turn as well but I wonder what they'll do about Peter and if they'll each be able to keep his secret? Hm. That's a curious little problem right there and I hope we get some answers soon!

Thanks for the swap!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hey, Gabbie!
Oh, please, don't apologize... I never meant to make you feel guilty... Thank you so much for the swap and your amazing reviews!!!

Erm... A bit crazy, I know... I must confess that I have a soft spot for Peter... Reading and writing so much Marauder era I became fascinated by his character, I kind of fell in love with him at a certain point... Don't get me wrong, I still hate him, but I decided to give him a redeeming occasion here... I'm glad you liked it!!!

I'm sorry you found the starting scene confusing... I wanted people not to understand immediatly what was going on, I wanted the reader to feel the anguish Peter was feeling in his nightmare. Not sure if I managed it...

I'm very happy you liked the chapter anyway! Yes, many things are different, Sirius' and James' lives in particular. We'll see if they'll find out and what will happen then...

Thank you so much again for swapping!
Much love,
Chiara


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Review #20, by Gabriella HunterEqual Measure Good and Bad: Puzzles

6th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with your long awaited review. You should really not be so patient with me, I am so sorry! D':

So, this was a really great chapter! I think that you have one of most original stories on the archives. I really, really love the depth that you've gone into this universe of yours, you have the original Trio of course but you've added some great elements. The world is far much bigger now and more dangerous, especially with what I just read at the very end! I don't know what you're going to do towards the end of this but you have to keep me informed.

Now, I really liked that you were able to keep your characters in sync throughout the very beginning. there was a good balance between them all that was believable, no one felt too overdeveloped and I really liked the fact that you allowed them to grow just a little as a team without the past getting in the way. I thought that was a great little contrast, since they were knee-deep in the Peverell diaries and finding out far more than they they expected.

I think those brothers were smarter and more cunning than they gave them credit for. The code that they used, Sumerian and Egyptian wouldn't have been expected and I just sort of SQUEALED! I have NEVER seen that used before now and I think it's brilliant! You're opening up all sorts of doors with this story and by the middle, I was completely hooked on this new journey. I knew that it was going to go in a direction I wasn't expecting but that ending really threw me! This is far more complex than just simple curses...someone out there might be trying to start a new war. But who? Why? I really hope we get answers soon!

I don't really have any CC's, though I would mention that your characters tend to be very proper. I don't know if that's how you want them to be but their conversations would feel a lot more natural if you added a bit of slang and added a contraction or two. Otherwise, I like the pace and all that jazz.

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Thanks Gabbie. The review as always was fantastic. :)

I always felt that the magical accomplishments of the other races were always sort of overlooked in both cannon and fanfiction so I just tried to address it here.

It is both a dangerous and heart-wrenching journey for all of them. About the 'properness', I have deliberately added some of it between the Golden Trio and 'Malfoy Trio' because both of them are slightly unsure about each other, although we see Ester and Hermione get closer. However I shall look into this matter if they are proper within their own trio.

Thanks again for this review and your effusive praise. :)


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Review #21, by Gabriella HunterThe Whole Universe: The Whole Universe

6th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by for our swap! I'm sorry that it took a minute, I would have been here sooner but things got out of my control for a minute or two. I'm here now though!

So, I thought that this was pretty adorable. I really like the idea that you came up with here and the underlying message. Lily doesn't have the most confidence from the beginning of this story but by the end, she's far more sure of herself and even taps into a very well-developed part of her magic and imagination.

I'm not sure what you could really complain about! I thought the imagery was beautifully done and I really loved the bond that you developed with Lily and Luna. I got the sense that they were very close, not merely for the hide and seek game but because of how easily Luna was able to understand Lily's fears and hopes. I think that the moments that they shared in the cupboard were wonderfully written and all of the little bits; the stars, Easter eggs, cats and so on, were just delightfully detailed. It really helped give the scenes more depth and I was truly able to sink into a child's mind.

The ending reminded me of Chronicles of Narnia, to be honest and I'm not sure if that was what you were going for but great job! On a CC note, there were a few misspelled words but other than that, you're good!

Thanks for the swap!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! (I hope everything's well in control on your front ;D )

I'm really glad (and relieved) that the imagery and Lily's development came out well. Especially the descriptions I thought might be too artificial. So, it's cool that you feel they gave the story some depth!

I think Luna has this gift of getting into people's head and understanding what's going on :)

For the ending, I didn't really think of the Chronicles of Narnia as I don't know them, but I guess maybe it's intuitive to end an adventure in a not-quite-real-world along these lines ^^

Thanks also for pointing out the misspellings etc. A bunch of mistakes I already corrected (dunno when they will be validated), so I hope I got the ones you noticed!

Thanks for taking the time to R&R!
Shinicha


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Review #22, by Gabriella HunterThe Clock: The Clock

3rd August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with our swap. I'm sorry that I didn't get to this right away but things got in the way but I'm here now!

So, I was pleasantly surprised to see that this was about George. I'm a HUGE fan of George and devour whatever I can that features him as a main character. I honestly love seeing how differently people write him and having him sucked into despair like this is powerful but beautiful.

I can sense his pain with each word and although you didn't go into a lot of detail on where he was in his life at that moment, you get the feeling that there's more and nothing. I got the sense that he may have been at a crossroads with himself and breaking down his grief the way you did--featuring his siblings and their various support while also showing how torn up he was, is brilliant. The ending tore at me a little but I am glad that I decided to give this story a chance!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hi Gabbie,

Thanks so much for your review! I am so, so happy that you read it as a "crossroads," because when I wrote this, I was imaging George at the greatest depth of his despair. I think from here things will get better for him. So you were exactly right.

No worries at all about needing a little extra time - I just posted your review a moment ago :)


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Review #23, by Gabriella HunterThese Memories: These Memories

1st August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with your review for our swap! I took a look at Valour a moment ago and I'd read up to five chapters so I thought about giving something else of yours shot. I will slither back to that story though soon!

I don't read many stories about Regulus. I never give him much thought for some reason but that my be because we don't know much about him from the actual books. I like here that you show that he isn't at all what he seems, his mother wants to pressure him into being the center of their universe but she isn't at all interested in seeing the true him. What I like here is that you show that he has more depth than we might have originally thought but at the same, he still has that pride. There's a lot going on in his mind that many wouldn't agree with and I caught myself frowning a few times during the beginning but towards the end, I understood his reasoning.

There wasn't going to be much of a chance for him to branch out. The world was caving around him and his future was pretty much set, he couldn't break away. I love that you had him going into Sirius's room too, the brothers obviously hadn't been close but you could sense how much Regulus wished that he had changed that before Sirius left. It was a sad look at their lives, I think and the fact that he was determined to keep up the ruse only emphasized how alone he really was. :(

There were a few grammar things here and there in the first few paragraphs but nothing too major. Thanks for the awesome read!

Much love,

Gabbie

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Review #24, by Gabriella HunterOn Crumbling Lives: Return

30th July 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with our swap! It's always great to read something different from you too until Broken Memories is back up. PLEASE tell me that you're working on the next chapter! D':

I really enjoyed this! It came off as so fresh and unique. I don't think that I've ever seen the Greengrass girls portrayed in this way and I think that this is going to stand out as being very original. I like the contrast that you have with the two: Daphne appears so hard on the outside but is actually quite sensitive while Astoria may be more insightful than people would give her credit for.

I like the beginning of this chapter too, it showed just how bad things could get for not only the family, but for everyone. I thought that it was realistic that their mother was so intent on staying, there's something about a home that ties people there. It might not be the wisest thing though, possessions can trap you but the argument to stay or leave is something that I'm sure plenty of people can relate to.

I also really, really loved the fact that you don't have the Greengrass family being this horde of bigots. Now, don't take that the wrong way but I've seen the same sort of idea about them more than once. Haughty purebloods that have nothing negative to say about the Dark Lord's regime, merely going along with it until they have a change of heart. I'm glad that they don't harbor such prejudices about Muggles and the like, though I really hope that no one finds out their secret just yet.

The way you broke this chapter down to show more about the girls was good too. I feel like they've been fleshed out well here and you can get the sense that they'll grow as the story goes on. I cringed during Daphne's part though and I know that it hurt her to injure anyone, especially a little kid. I was amazed that she managed to hold her composure!

Astoria on the other hand may have to be more careful. She didn't let it slip that she detested the views in her class but the tears are going to get her into deeper trouble. Detention? God, I'm scared for her. I hope that she'll be all right!

So, great start to a chapter! I hope to stop by again soon!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hello Gabbie!

I am still working on Broken Memories! I've been at the next chapter for ages now, but as you and I both know, I work at a glacial pace. I've been trying to improve lately, but it's hard...

I'm really happy you enjoyed this first chapter. It's actually the first novel I posted here after a very long hiatus. I've been working at it for a while too, so I'm glad you think it's good!

You're right in that it probably isn't wise for the Greengrasses to stay in England when they could have a nice, normal life in America. But people are so attached to home.

The Greengrass family's beliefs definitely came from when I was characterizing Scorpius for something else. He was just so sweet and lovely, I realized that he must come from a mother who is also sweet and lovely. Ergo, her family is not prejudiced like so many other purebloods.

I do hope you stop by the next chapter as well! Thanks for the review!

Stefanie


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Review #25, by Gabriella HunterYear Five: O.W.L.s

29th July 2015:
HELLO!

This is Gabbie from the forums dropping by with you review! I was a tad bit late this time but I've moved and it's been crazy! This adulting thing is annoying, man.

On to this!

So, the dreaded OWLs have arrived. I thought that I could practically feel the group cringing through some of them. There's nothing worse than knowing that you have this huge life altering test coming up but what I liked was that each member of the group was going through something completely different. I'm not sure if this was on purpose or not but I think that you showed each of their lives well here, the tests that they took reflected on their lives and how far they had come.

Perhaps I'm reading a little too much into metaphors here but I thought that was a great way to tie them all together. It's great to see that some of their issues have slowed down somewhat (Emily not smoking anymore) while others still need to be resolved. I thought that you wrote the passage of time really well though, you didn't dwell too long on one particular subject--the span of days went by quickly as they were met with more and more challenges.

I also enjoyed that you didn't just have all of the group miraculously getting through their OWLs without making mistakes. That would have been completely unrealistic, I think but what I gathered was that if this group, with so many issues can actually try for a better future, anyone could. They worried for each other, encouraged themselves and kept on going (Except for Tristan, who gave the middle finger to History of Magic like a boss. Hahahaha)

Now, onto Tristan...

NO!

WHAT HAPPENED?!

I know that it wasn't some kind of accident and I had a feeling that something would go wrong after that little thing with Malfoy. Ugh, what a little snot, eh? I also like the canon that you added into this too, what with him bragging about that Nimbus his Dad was going to get him and all that. But...but...Tristan! Ugh, I can't believe that you've done this to me!

I'll be back, darn you.

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Yay Gabbie!

I'm so glad you thought there was, yeah, like a reflection of where they were at. I think for a lot a couple of them (like Emily and Laurel), the exams kind of shook them out of their more personal worries and gave them something else to focus their energies on. (I think a big problem for these kids is that they're sort of under-stimulated. Very clever, each of them, but with not enough outlets for their energies. They would probs have all benefited a lot from more extra-curricular activities).

Passage of time here was something a thought about a lot, so I'm glad you think it was well done. I worried about rushing in this story, but here, I think a kind of rushed pace made the frantic mood come through better.

And yeah, they def COULD have done better on their exams if they'd worked put more energy into their classes before.

About Tristan. I'M SO SORRY! I swear I didn't plan this, but then all of a sudden I realized it HAD to happen, and that I'd sort of subconsciously been building to it (and that the Lake had come to take on this weird sort of significance).

Sorry sorry sorry!

And AH! Only two chapters left! EeEeEeEe!

xoxo
Roisin



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