Reading Reviews From Member: 800 words of heaven
406 Reviews Found

Review #1, by 800 words of heavenUnravel. : Pansy.

2nd May 2015:

First of all, let me commend you on the number of challenges that this story is fulfilling. Good luck on them all! Iím so impressed!

Iím actually super happy about all the Slytherin character challenges that are going on at the moment. Itís so lovely to see all the different interpretations of little-written characters, or characters that are often stereotyped in a certain role in stories. I just love this take on Pansy! The way her mind works is different from the norm, and different from what Iíd expect of her. Her almost-obsession with numbers calls to my inner mathematics nerd. But she uses them as a way of controlling her environment, and no matter what oneís position is in society, be they pureblood or muggleborn, I think everyone can relate to that need for control.

But sheís also into fashion! Her thing with numbers doesnít stop her from being creative, or pursuing her career goals Ė itís actually a good thing! Itís also really nice to see that Pansy is so ruthless about it all still. Fashion can often be regarded as being ďgirlyĒ and thus less important, but Pansy is pursuing her career with the same cutthroat attitude that may be seen in the executive boardroom of any company. More power to her!

No! I donít like Pansy at all in the books, but my heart breaks for her here. I empathise with her, her need for perfection, her drive to be the best. I just want to give her a hug and tell her thatís itís all going to be okay, even though it probably wonít.

This was a lovely read. I thoroughly enjoyed this refreshing take on Pansy. Thanks for the swap :)

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Review #2, by 800 words of heavenLily, I'm a Werewolf. : Lily, I'm a werewolf.

1st May 2015:
Hey, hey, hey! So I owed you a review swap from months ago (possibly even last year), and I'm so so so sorry for taking so long to get here, but better late than never, yeah? (Probably not...)

Oh, I can't resist Marauder friendship stories! There seriously need to be more written, and not just about the boys, but way more involving Lily and her relationship with them. I'm so glad that you've added to the collection, because you're such a wonderful writer, and anything to which you add your creative prowess is vastly improved.

OMG Remus! I always feel like giving Remus a hug, but this made me want to hug him even more than usual. The poor boy has such self-esteem issues, and he hates himself so much. It's just wonderful the way you've captured that. You haven't outright told us that's how he feels about himself, but through his dialogue it is abundantly clear.

And I loved how understanding Lily is through all of this. Of course she already knew that he was a werewolf, giving poor Remus quite the shock! But it just highlights her caring and loving nature, that she still loves Remus despite what society tells her she should feel for werewolves.

Basically, I wanted to give everyone in this story a hug. Thanks so much for the wonderful read. I'm really sad that it's taken me so long to find this story, but I'm so happy that I did finally find it.

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Review #3, by 800 words of heavenEvolution: Mitigating Damages

1st May 2015:
Hey, hey, hey! I apologise for being a little late with this review. I actually read the chapter a couple of days ago, but time got the best of me, and thus was not able to write up my thoughts. But here I am!

You definitely accomplish a lot in this chapter! I was really looking forward to the way James and Lily would handle the situation. It is very true that Dumbledore throws them in the deep end with no life raft, but from his point of view, he's grooming the leaders of the future. I'm sure he's already thinking of having these two join the Order after they graduate, and to be effective members of that secret society, they'd have to set themselves apart at school.

In terms of the cloak being too much too soon - I didn't think so. James strikes me as one of those people who trusts deeply and somewhat quickly. In effect, he puts his trust in trust, and expects the person at the receiving end to have the same sort of honour system as he does. From that point of view, it makes sense that he'd share the Invisibility Cloak with Lily. Also, it does seem like a good strategy on their part. I think his sharing the cloak also highlights another aspect of James' character, and something which Lily still lacks. He's a strong enough individual to realise that he can't do everything alone, and therefore uses partnerships to full effect. I have a feeling that if the roles were reversed, Lily would have rather carried out this plan alone, rather than including James.

And this now leads me to Lily. In this chapter more than any others set in seventh year illustrate just how much she has to grow as a leader. James is already there - he's confident, he's charismatic, and he has an astute understanding of the people he leads. Lily still lacks that. Of course, there was the beginning of her working towards that goal, with her spontaneous lying - I was rather proud of her for that one! But she still has so far to go. You touch upon her sudden realisation that she's feeling rather lonely this year, and I'm waiting for her to figure out that part of that is her fault. She's always sort of shied away from asking for support when she's needed it, and now when she needs a system of people who'll be there for her emotionally, it's not there. I'd love to see Lily build positive bonds with others outside of Alanna, Marlene, and the Marauders. Her other major relationship so far has just been with Lionel, and that didn't work out too well.

A lovely chapter, overall. As always, I eagerly anticipate the next one :)

Author's Response: First off, there is no "late" for reviews, especially delightfully detailed ones like yours! I really appreciate you carrying on with this story and giving me such great feedback - especially when I've been rather intermittent this year with updates.

You're absolutely right about Dumbledore. Making them handle it on their own is the second in his line of machinations for them (after naming them co-Heads) which are definitely geared toward cultivating them as leaders and as people - yes, for the benefit of the Order too.

You're very right about James and Lily's styles too (I'm glad I've developed them well enough that it comes across). While I hope to demonstrate in some other settings that it isn't that Lily's a poor leader, James is much more the charismatic coalition-builder than she is. Lily is generally well-liked because (to everyone but the Marauders-less-Remus) she's very kind and then she prefers to lead by example. They'll both learn a little of the other's style from each other as things progress though. The trust angle definitely plays in as well because though I intend to edit it to make the friendship dynamic with Lily and her friends a BIT less superficial, it is at least partially deliberately so - partly because she still deals with "outsider status" as a muggleborn, partly because of the collapse of her relationship with Petunia, and partly because of a past trauma.

Though I'm not 100 percent convinced that I won't need to go back and edit later to make their growth less divided, you're right about Lily. Early 7th is much more about HER growth (though it will still involve James dealing with the trauma of last summer) and the whole year they'll grow together. As for her support network, though from canon we know she's well-liked and social enough, I've actually kind of viewed her as someone with loads of people she's on good terms with, but comparatively few TRUE friends (tying back to her trust issues and also owing in part to her connection with Snape until recently). That may be controversial (since though I don't remember Lupin's exact words about her I think he referenced her having lots of friends), but I've always viewed that through the "Lupin-lens" which I think would regard simply being on good terms with so many people as being friends because he also doesn't have many given his issues - though in life I think having a huge network of people you're on good terms with is VERY different from having loads of FRIENDS. We shall see though. Lily's connections with those she leads will deepen as the year goes on though as she learns from James about confidence and tactics and as she starts to acknowledge her own imperfections. I'm contemplating an off-shoot friendship with a non-Gryffindor prefect in that vein, but who knows!

Thanks so much for the spectacular review! I'm hoping to have an update sooner rather than later!

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Review #4, by 800 words of heavenPINK WINE: madame puddifoots

30th April 2015:

Ah, I can't resist me a good Valentine's Day story, and there's nothing better than one feature a snarky heroine!

Scarlett definitely doesn't disappoint! She's feisty and so grumpy. I love it. Despite that, you can tell that she's quite intelligent, as she makes astute observations somewhere in all that snark and sarcasm. I'd love to read more of her.

And poor Sirius! I have a soft spot for him, and whilst I can't bear the idea of someone hurting him like that (totally part of his fan club lol) I must say that he deserved it. He doesn't flirt with one, but two girls who are not his date? For shame!

And I actually really enjoyed the almost random appearance of Eros! You did so well capturing his somewhat cruel and capricious nature. Plus it was nice to see that love doesn't go even Eros' way sometimes!

I'd totally love to read more about Sirius and Scarlett's explosive romance! A fun story!

Author's Response: thank you so much for your lovely review!!! you're really cute. (: x

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Review #5, by 800 words of heavenSturm und Drang : Freedom

29th April 2015:
Hey, hey, hey! I'm here for the April Slytherin review swap!

I can't resist a good Draco-after-the-war story, especially when it involves Astoria Greengrass. There's just so many places one can take their romance and it's always great to read how different authors write all of that. I'm excited to see where you take these two!

This is quite a short chapter, but I think it works great as an introduction. I particularly like how you've opened it with an article about Draco. It's a nice way to set up where he is right now and what the rest of the community thinks of him, as well as showing how he presents himself to the public.

It's gets better because then we see how Draco is at home, away from the spotlight. His experience during the war has definitely changed him, made him more mature, but he's still a not-quite-nice person. He's somewhat dismissive and arrogant despite everything, which I think is great. I'm interested to see whether or not he changes his opinions through the course of the story or not.

I think it's quite interesting that more than Draco, Narcissa has changed for the "better". I hope we get to see more of her and her relationship with her son.

Great start to the story! I really enjoyed it :)

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Review #6, by 800 words of heavenA Single Point In Time: 1983

22nd April 2015:

It's been a while since I visited this story, and I was super excited to see that this chapter is about Sirius. He's one of my favourite characters, and this definitely didn't disappoint!

I can't remember whether I've mentioned this in my previous reviews or not, but I simply love this story for the way you write these characters. There's relatively few words here - I feel that if I tried a project like this, I'd be rambling on and on for 5000 words and said maybe a quarter of what you say - and you just do so much with them. The economy is so fantastic, and I really commend you for that.

The language here is just so beautiful. Your description creates such vivid external and internal environments, and the transition between describing Sirius' physical being to his mental state and then back again is just so flawless and amazing and ugh. I'm in love with the way you write this story. It's like reading Shakespeare - you don't read it just for the story, but also for the fact that it is written, and how beautifully you write.

I just... my heart hurts for Sirius here. It really does. He thinks about only a small number of things but it reveals a depth of character to him that is a rare treat. The Azkaban stories that I've read about Sirius tend to focus on just one aspect of his character, but I can imagine him as he was, as he is, and as he will be. It's just fantastic!

I hope you don't mind all the gushing and the slight incoherence of this review, but I really enjoyed this chapter, and I'm looking forward to returning to read about Narcissa in the near future! Thanks for the lovely read :)

Author's Response: Heya!

Thank you so so much for this lovely review! Honestly, this has absolutely made my day and maybe it made me cry too and it is so lovely and kind of you ♥ thank you so, so much!

I'm really glad that you enjoyed this chapter, and that I really gave you all the Sirius feelz! I really wanted to emphasise that he's absolutely at a loss in Azkaban and doesn't know what to think let alone do. Your comments about my language are really really kind, and I'll remember them when I'm writing the next chapter. I really hope you do enjoy the next chapter (it was my favourite one to write although it is a little different) - and just thank you so much for this confidence boost ♥ I really, really needed it ♥

Laura xxx

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Review #7, by 800 words of heavenLoyalty: Loyalty

17th April 2015:

Okay, so if you're expecting a coherent review, you'll be much disappointed because THIS WAS FANTASTIC OMG I WANT MORE.

I'm really not one for sad love stories, but for some reason Helga and Salazar have pulled on my heartstrings so hard and I don't want the pain to end. I'm probs going to come back and just read it again and again and again because I love the way they love each other so much.

I didn't expect Salazar to love Helga the way he does. I expected him to be far more distant from his feelings, more wrapped up in himself, and to feel just a twinge of remorse about what he did.

BUT NO. He just feels so much. In the end, it's this depth of emotion that's his downfall and his saving grace. He loves Helga with this fierceness of spirit and all of his being. That's an aspect of his personality that I've never read before; there are many stories of romance involving him, but he's always portrayed as this dude who's too self-involved to really care. But here, that iron will, that endless drive that defines him is focused on her and his love for her and that's just... OMG. Beautiful.

But he's still so complex! He loves her, but it's not enough to make him turn away from his path. He's still who he is, and he accepts that about himself. He makes no apologies for who he is, even for Helga, and that shows a depth of understanding of self that is just breathtaking.

AND THAT LAST PART WITH THE BASILISK JUST KILLED ME. He didn't want her to die! And he feels absolutely horrible that she does, but he can't help it. This is who he is. But he still closes the Chamber ONLY FOR HER.

In so few words, you've encapsulated such complex characters and such a stark depth of emotion, and I'm just... in awe. This is fantastic you are fantastic. Thank you so much for this story!

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Review #8, by 800 words of heavenCowardice: Cowardice

9th April 2015:
Heya! So. Um. I owed you a review swap from ages ago. More than certainly from sometime last year. I am so terribly sorry to have kept you waiting like this. I can be a horrible person like that sometimes.

Oh, but I wish I'd come to this story earlier! I love love love it! I have a growing appreciation for all things Founders, and I just adore love stories between Helga and Salazar. Despite my preference for lighter things, there's something just so fantastically compelling about their romance - you know it's doomed from the start.

This is quite possibly my favourite romance written in the Founders era. Helga's keen pain at Salazar's betrayal is just so heartbreaking but I also can't help going "you go gurl!" at that ending. She accepts the painful death by Basilisk - but it's because Salazar's already killed her. But she also wants Salazar to die this super horrible death, despite the fact that it feels as if a part of her still loves him. So complex! So fantastic!

I'm terribly sorry for this incredibly short review, but I'm in danger of just gushing and gushing and gushing. Lovely work!

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Review #9, by 800 words of heavenMuggle Affairs: Chapter 1

25th March 2015:

For a first fanfic, your subject material is quite intense, which has me very impressed! Thanks to Agent Carter, I'm on a bit of a World War II bender, so this was right up my alley.

Spies! Plots! Limited magic! Two already close people who are going to become even closer! What more could you really want in a WWIII AU story?

This first chapter is quite brief, but I think its brevity suits the mood rather well. You set up the scene and the tone for the rest of the story, giving us enough of an idea of the plot to keep us intrigued. As a happy bonus, we get to meet two characters already. I'm looking forward to meet Johnny in person!

I would have loved a little more description here and there, but overall, the piece reads well and there's enough there for me to imagine the scene.

A very nice start, and good luck with the rest of the story :)

Author's Response: Hey!

Thanks for the compliments! I'm so glad to hear your opinions. I'm also happy to know that the short chapter suits the mood as I was a bit worried about if there was enough for a first chapter and if it set up the story.

I'll try to add a little more imagery, but I'm so relieved that it reads well because that was another thing I was concerned about.



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Review #10, by 800 words of heavenUnlikely: Abandoned

23rd March 2015:

Oh, I am so here for Gryffindor/Slytherin friendships, especially those during the Hogwarts era and between two women to boot! It kinda sucks that they have to go under an AU label, but at least you've written something like this, and for that, I am forever thankful.

First of all, I just love the fact that you've written about the beginning of a friendship between two women. So often, females are portrayed as trying to rip each other apart, especially when they're on opposites sides of a rivalry like the one between Gryffindor and Slytherin.

And OMG. The sass these two girls have! Fantastic! So fantastic! It's literally all I have to say on that subject. I am all about the sass, as well as the friendship.

It's so great that these two girls bond over something that's perceived as being really "girly" but they're so unashamedly enthusiastic about it anyway. It doesn't take anything away from their strong personalities, and I really like how it's decoupled "girly" from "weak".

I really enjoyed this little one-shot. Thanks for the lovely read :)

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for reading and reviewing. I love Lion/Snake friendships too so I'm glad you enjoyed this.

Haha I know, females are prone to cat fights. But somehow I felt a situation should be different here.

I'm pleased you enjoyed the sass as I wasn't sure about it xP My intention was to show just how feminine stuff is good too and how it can bring people together and how it doesn't have to be something 'tough' or 'crazy', so I am glad you liked the bit.

Thanks a lot for your review!

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Review #11, by 800 words of heavenAll the truth about Jimmy Portman: The Hogwarts' Express

11th March 2015:

This story looked a little lonely so I thought I'd check it out. I don't really read much AU, especially those set in the Hogwarts era, but I'm open to new ideas.

So this seems pretty awesome so far. Why is Jimmy's dad not actually Jimmy's dad? Why doesn't he want anyone to find out his real identity? What even is his real identity? So many questions, and it's only the first chapter. Exciting stuff!

A lovely start and I'll be seeing you at the end of the next chapter in the nearish future :)

Author's Response: Oh, wow! Thanks!
I'm very happy that you liked this first chapter! :)
Yes, I know... A lot of questions... You'll find out the answers if you keep reading (no spoilers here, I'm sorry...)
Really hope you won't be disappointed with what comes next and that I'll hear from you again soon!
Thanks a lot again for the lovely review!

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Review #12, by 800 words of heavenThe Internal Monologue of Jamie Nott: Okay, so maybe it wasn't very romantic

16th February 2015:
Hello Jamie! I am back sooner than expected, since this time I read this chapter at a decent time.

Ah! Your quest for true crush has been thwarted by a playful Giant Squid. Happens to the best of us, my friend.

But perhaps this is a sign that you should spend more time with your non-human friends. Might you be neglecting them in pursuit of human companionship? The balance is hard to strike, I understand, but this may be a skill that you need to cultivate in order to have a successful career as a magizoologist in the future. But enough of that. I have harped on far too long on this particular subject.

Madam Longbottom is terrifying. She puts her patients into a full body bind? That's very hardcore. I can't imagine the state to be rather comfortable or restful, however. What if you get itchy? I'd die if this happened to me. Thank goodness you have a Devyn to come save you in situations such as these. She is a true friend.

I look forward to hearing about your epiphany in the next installment, Jamie! Until then, adios!

Author's Response: Oh, any time is a decent time, 800 words of heaven!

Phew. I'm glad in not the only one! But I guess it can't be helped, right?! Gail's sweet that way. And she's got quite the knack for reminding me about that, you're right. Maybe I should!

I see, 800 words of heaven. You give excellent career advice. Ooh! Brilliant idea. I could do both at the same time!

It is. But she's just really worried about us and extreme concerned for our well-being. In that respect, I do not dare argue with her. If I get itchy, and I did, good Merlin the rage an itchy and inaccessible nose can give, I kindly asked Carmen to come over and give it a little gentle scratching. She was kind enough to do that for me. ^_^

Devyn is, mate. Most certainly is. She's amazing. . .

That's so very kind of you. And to write to me, too. Thank you for talking to me!


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Review #13, by 800 words of heavenThe Internal Monologue of Jamie Nott: A Romantic Picnic by the Great Lake

15th February 2015:
Jamie! I am back! I actually read this particular section of your monologue a couple of days ago, but I read it far too late at night to leave a coherent review. But I am, once again, here!

I think I must go meet this person Kluge. You speak a lot of her, and despite your misgivings about her, I find her intriguing. I am sure your fear is unfounded. And I wish Devyn's brother the best of luck because being spurned by love (or is it like like?) saddens me greatly.

I think your picnic by the lake was a great idea! I dearly hope that Devyn says yes. I know I probably would ;) But alas, you are not asking me - and rightly so since we hardly know each other.

The food that you eat! OMG. I want some. I also have never eaten these awesome-sounding berries, but like you, I feel the loss deeply. And this only because I experienced their amazingness vicariously through you! I really hope that along with your quest to woo your best friend, you continue to eat amazing things.

I am now very hungry, so I shall go and drink some tea and meet you once again at the end of the next chapter. Fair thee well, Jamie!

Author's Response: Hello, dear 800 words of heaven!! Hello again!

Please, should you do so, if you could so kindly refrain from mentioning me? I fear for my life. But now for yours as well. Be safe, 800 words of heaven. I like you, don't die on me. But I may just be exaggerating. She seems scary, but inactive. Good Merlin knows. As for Devyn's brother, I suppose the worst that could happen is that she'd say 'no' and scare him??

Would you?! That's wonderful to hear. 800 words of heaven, you make me redden in the facial area.

Yay for vicarious experiences!! I shall send you some. Or I would. If I knew how. :( EATING MORE AMAZING THINGS, 800 WORDS OF HEAVEN! I shall!! This is an exclent idea of yours!! More amazing food! Hmm. . . How about Bree cheese? That's always been a favourite of hers. . .

Is this chai you speak of? THAT tea?! I want some, too!

Fair thee well as well, 800 words of heaven, new friend of mine,

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Review #14, by 800 words of heavenIlluminations: Alfajores

14th February 2015:

THOSE ALFAJORES MADE ME SO HUNGRY. I have a huge sweet tooth, so the biscuits are the only thing I can think of right now. I just need a moment to process how delicious they must be before I can move on with my review.

There. That's better.

This is such a cool idea for a story! Hogwarts staff shenanigans! I love it already. I hope this fic of yours starts off its own little subgenre. I particularly like that you've chosen to pair Dumbledore and Sprout as partners in crime. The usual choice would've been Dumbledore and McGonagall, althoug I can't even begin to imagine Professor McGonagall doing something like this. But I think Pomona has that certain spark of mischief about her that would make this work.

I'm really excited to get to know the staff throughout the course of this story. I don't know how many of them you plan to include, or how far each of them will be developed, but anything you have to say about them would add to their characters from canon, I think. And they're all young! That makes it so much more fun. They're in their prime, still in the process of achieving the great things we know them for in the books. I am SOOO excited (have I mentioned this already? I think I have, but it bears mentioning again).

I also just wanted to say one final thing about your description. I'm rubbish at it myself, and so I'm always on the lookout for it. This is just great. There's little dialogue here, so I could really focus on the descriptions and savour them for their beauty. They created the scene in my head quite vividly, especially all the times you spoke of Pomona's breath - it felt as if I was breathing along with her.

This is such a great start, and I'm super excited for the next chapter :)

Author's Response: Hi there! Thank you so much for stopping by! :)

Haha, they made me so hungry too while I was writing it. I had to look them up, look at pictures and ingredients and things to get the description and it was so bad... had to buy biscuits the next day to make up for them :P

I'm so glad you like the idea! It's something which had been buzzing around my head for a little while now, and when I mentioned the idea on the forums, people seemed to think it was interesting, so I had to write it them! Yeah, I did consider McGonagall, but as you say her personality doesn't quite fit it, but I also wanted it to be Pomona for plot reasons :P And mostly because McGonagall works much better as a character being meddled with than meddling herself, haha.

I'm so excited about including the staff! I think there'll be quite a lot who are familiar from canon - maybe a couple of OCs, or named teachers who don't appear in the books - but I'm hoping to include a lot of the people we know from canon, even if only as background characters. They're all young, yeah - apart from Albus, lol, he's heading out of young, I think :P But yeah, they've all got time and they're all still learning and growing and so on... It's going to be so much fun, and I'm so glad to see you're as excited about it as I am! :D

Thank you so much! This, um, actually has a comparatively large amount of dialogue for me :P I remember finishing it and thinking 'so much dialogue' haha, but then I don't usually write much at all... a few lines at most :P I'm so glad you liked the description, though - I'm used to writing scenery, but food and things are pretty new for me, so some bits of it were more difficult to write than I expected.

Thank you so so much for the wonderful review - it was so lovely to get - and I'll try to get the next chapter up soon! ;)

Aph xx

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Review #15, by 800 words of heavenThe Internal Monologue of Jamie Nott: The Two Laws of Hogwarts

14th February 2015:
Hello Jamie! It is a pleasure to read your story. Alas, this is the first time I am visiting the page on which your story is hosted, and this saddens me somewhat since it seems as if you are in quite good company. But I am here!

Jamie, you lead a far more interesting life than I do. I also admire you for your clear goal-setting. At your age, I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. I somewhat envy you, since you know what your vocation is.

You describe yourself as liking humans/humanoid, and I don't think that can be better exemplified than by your friendship with Hagrid. Despite his horrible cooking skills, you visit him regularly, are genuinely interesting in his life, and offer your help without expecting anything in return. I don't know how you treat your other friends, but Hagrid is lucky to count you as a homie.

Jamie, I wish you well on your quest to score a date with one Devyn Yang. Things are more complicated for you because of the best friend thing, but I am sure things will work in your favour. I am, after all, reading this on Valentine's Day, and that just HAS to mean something.

See you next chapter Jamie!

Author's Response: 800 words of heaven, hello there!

Ah well, that's alright, you are here now! Em says she'd like to give you a hug for that. Not give? Okay, she says 'maul.' She'd like to maul you with a hug, Em that's kind of harsh? Anyways. . .

Nah, I'm sure your life is loads interesting. :D We all have our stories, I suppose. ;) Why thank you! It was a 'do what you love' kind of thing, I guess. Plus, the career opportunities the profs explore here are pretty helpful. I'm sure that whatever you choose in the future you'll do extremely well! Best of best of luck, 800 words of heaven. You already work wonderfully in your career as a Master of Awesome! :P

Aww, Hagrid? He's a lovely guy despite his horrible cooking. You cannot not love a guy like him. He does really cool stuff, too! He's what first got me thinking about my career opportunities. I owe a lot to him. 800 words of heaven, you make me red, thank you.

That's extremely kind of you and I really appreciate it a whole lot!! That's true and yes you are, let's hope your doing so can do something for me.

Happy Valentine's Day, 800 words of heaven!!


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Review #16, by 800 words of heavenJames Potter's Stupid Journal: Keep It Simple, Stupid

14th February 2015:
Heya! I'm back for chapter three!

I'm sad to see that this is the last chapter posted. I hope that you come back to this story soon. I'm really enjoying reading it.

James is such a pleasure to read. He's not a player or anything, but he is a little mischievous which rather suits him. He's also a bit of a mummy's boy, keeping his journal in his bag, although I don't think that is something you'd want getting into the hands of the Marauders.

I hadn't even thought about the fact that the Map doesn't lie. I can't imagine a scenario where the Marauders don't figure out what's going on, so that should be fun. Right now it's funny watching them sort of shun him. I can imagine that they're quite secretive, what with all the the illegal Animagi and General mischief-making that they get up to. It's nice to see that at least Lily is not that way.

Lovely chapter! I hope you post the next one soon :)

Author's Response: Hello!

Yes, unfortunately this is all I have posted so far. I'm studying abroad this semester, so we'll see how much time I have to write... But I can tell you I have a good part of chapter 4 written. :D

I am SO GLAD you like James. He is a bit mischievous, yes, and also definitely a bit of a mummy's boy-- though he will forever maintain that it's not that he's a mummy's boy, but that his mum is rather scary when she wants to be. :P And no, I don't think that's something the Marauders should get their hands on-- especially now that James is using it as a log of operations of sorts. That list especially might be troublesome. ^_^

We'll have to see how long it takes/if the Marauders find out everything. :P It'll definitely take some finagling on James and Sofie's parts no matter how things turn out...

And I'm sure I have NO IDEA what you're talking about. Between being illegal Animagi, all the pranking the Marauders get up to, and Remus' furry little problem, I don't see ANY reason why the Marauders might be secretive. XD

I'll try to get the next chapter up soon, but like I said, I'm studying abroad, so we'll see how it works out.

Thanks once more for the lovely review! :D

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Review #17, by 800 words of heavenEvolution: The Prince's Path

14th February 2015:
Heya! I'm back again!

I really enjoyed this chapter for the way it set up the scene for what's happening outside of Hogwarts with Voldemort's aggressive rise to power. What I particularly enjoy about the way you write these events is that you make it relevant to the students at Hogwarts. They're very much a part of this movement, more so for Voldemort right now, but I think Dumbledore is grooming Lily and James to be his torchbearers for the good fight in the halls of Hogwarts. I imagine that this would have quite an impact on them and thus influence their decision to join the Order after they graduate. most other stories I've read portray the reason for this change to be quite sudden and because of some sort of cataclysmic event, but you're building it up slow, which makes it far more realistic.

Snape is as melodramatic as ever. It's interesting to read about what motivates him. To me, he seems far more caught up in the fact that this gives him importance and respect and a chance to be a leader. More than anything else I think he enjoys the recognition. He's also still deluded when it comes to Lily, thinking that she'd defend him about being caught in a Death Eater hangout. What even, Snape? This is a bit ridiculous, even for him.

I liked they way you used Dumbledore as a link between Hogwarts and the rest of the community. However, I did find that some of his dialogue was rather inane. I understand the effect you were trying to achieve; he speaks in riddles - and a lot of what he said was to that effect. Also my guess to the book he gave James is The Art of War.

Looking forward to the next chapter, as always :)

Author's Response: Hello again! You are correct about the book - and the dialogue. The struggle with that for me was that I actually had originally intended this scene to be far more literal, but as I wrote it and reflected more, I realized there was no chance that Dumbledore would be as open about things with James and Lily, especially not at this phase of their lives, and so I had to re-write it to be much more riddle-y, perhaps going too far in that direction.

You're definitely right too about him wanting them to be torchbearers. I definitely imagine that both Dumbledore and Voldemort would have a great interest in winning over the youth of the era if possible. Dumbledore's difficulty of course is that despite his machinations, he is still ultimately good and wouldn't abuse his authority to achieve his ends, while Voldemort is happy to have loyal subjects infiltrate Hogwarts (including student leadership positions) to accomplish his ends. Because of this difference, Dumbledore needs to have James and Lily decide for themselves to fight that "hearts and minds" battle in the halls and he chose them because he believes they will - and will do so better as a unified team. As you point out, this is definitely something I want to explore slowly and realistically so that we can see the first War's impact on students too outside of the deaths (and because it definitely WILL dovetail with the pair's decision to join the Order).

As for Snape's thoughts on Lily, I don't think I conveyed it as well as I could have because I try to keep Snape's sentences mostly short to fit his overall sense of bitterness in that area. Really, what I intended to express better was to pick-up on his side of Lily and James's silent exchange about whether he would hurt her, to emphasize that he would not have. Something to come back and edit later. Even outside of Lily though, he is a rather dramatic character. Part of that is that he's still a teenager and that he's not yet developed his more canonical ability to be as coldly calculating. Here he's also on a high about, as you say, the prospect of significance and recognition, which I think given his upbringing and his sorting into Slytherin would be big driving factors for him.

Right now, I'm trying desperately to crank out a challenge entry, but after that I'll be starting the next chapter for sure. It should have more direct interaction between James and Lily as well as more prominent appearances by Remus and Peter and, whether it's your thing or not, Quidditch practice.

Thanks for the wonderful, thoughtful review!

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Review #18, by 800 words of heavenEvolution: Twice Skived

13th February 2015:
Heya! I've fallen a little behind on this story since Secret Santa ended, but I have finally arrived.

I quite enjoyed this chapter. The length of it allowed me to get back into the swing of things and reacquaint myself with your characters. I did find the transitions a little abrupt, but since the scenes themselves were so distinct, it didn't detract too much from the overall flow of the chapter.

It was really nice to see Sirius unintentionally prodding Lily towards some introspection. I'd never really thought about it that way before, but the way Sirius phrased her behaviour as hypocritical concerning arrogance rang true with me. I see this not only as the beginnings of Lily realising her own flaws, but perhaps also the start of her and Sirius' eventually-close friendship.

It's comforting to see James doing a little better this chapter, although I imagine it'll take him quite some time to get over what happened with Katie. His little rant about the reason why things are the way they are with Voldemort's rise to power is admirable, but also a little idealistic - I feel as if he's simplified the situation somewhat, and this is quite telling of the way he sees the world in terms of black and white.

The Death Eater gathering at Hogwarts was a clever reminder about what's happening outside the walls of Hogwarts. We read a lot about it through Lily's ruminations but there's something else to be said about seeing it first hand. And the fact that two prefects were involved underscored the point that no one is really above suspicion.

Lovely chapter! I'll be back for the next soon :)

Author's Response: Howdy!

Thanks so much for this review and the recommendation on the forums! I've never had a story recommended before so it was a great thing to come back to after a LONG day (and long weekend ahead). I've really enjoyed all the thought and detail that you put into your reviews and this one is no different.

I definitely hear you about the transitions, they were way harder than normal. The first one was originally a little softer with a transitional Lily-introspective scene, but it felt a bit too much like pulling back the curtain and undermining the effect of Sirius's comment at the end of Potions so I struck it.

As for James, he's definitely doing better. And he is very black and white about things. It's one of the interesting aspects (I think) about what his and Lily's relationship will become - James is really the "man of action" and while Lily has no fear of acting decisively herself, she has a more considered, nuanced approach. They'll prove to be complementary in that way once Lily realizes that just about the only people she HASN'T taken a considered approach to are James and Sirius (which is on the way soon).

I'm interested to see what you think of the next chapter (in particular the meeting with Dumbledore) as it plays more on the war growing and its impact on the school and Dumbledore's corresponding machinations without being overt at this point.

Thanks a million!

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Review #19, by 800 words of heavenRose: Unrequited

12th February 2015:

I'm also here for our February review exchange... and last week's Hot Seat. But since I'm fulfilling so many review thingies in one, I'll leave more :)

This was so sad and sweet. Scorose are one of my OTPs and it just breaks my heart when they can't be together :(

I liked the way you wrote Scorpius. He quite obviously values Rose and their relationship. I'm a little unclear as to the particular flavour of his love. Is it romantic? Or does he just love her without needing the romance? I got the impression that he wanted his feelings reciprocated romantically, but he understood that they weren't. He just wanted what's best for her.

In that sense, I really liked this story. His love is so altruistic. He just wants to be there for her, and make sure that she is happy and well. That's really adorable too.

Lovely one-shot! It really made me think about the different forms love can take.

Author's Response: Hey! Thank you for reading and reviewing. I am glad you liked the way I wrote Scorpius. He loves her truly but his happiness lies in happiness. I am glad you enjoyed this!

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Review #20, by 800 words of heavenKeep Calm and Carry On: Take Two and Call Me in the Morning

11th February 2015:

I've been meaning to start reading this story for the longest time. It's been floating around the forums and tumblr, and I'm always like "I shall read that!... Tomorrow." But finally, tomorrow has arrived and I am here.

This is a great start. I'm not really a bar person and this has just underscored for me why. This is a good thing, because I was very vividly imagining the setting and the crowd and the noise... I am Lisa. An old maid.

I quite enjoy Edie's voice. She's a twenty-something with her life not like what people say it should be by then, but she's unconcerned. I really like that. I can somewhat relate to her situation and I take heart in her attitude.

What I'm most looking forward to in the next few chapters is getting to know Dean and Seamus better. They seem quite fun now and I'm sort of excited to read about their adventures through adulthood.

Excellent start. I shall be back for more... soon :)

Author's Response: Hey! Well I'm glad that "tomorrow has arrived," as you've said. Also pretty pumped that my incessant spamming of this fic on Tumblr is paying off ;)

Hahaha, that's funny--I can indeed see how a crowded room full of drunk Quidditch hooligans does not sound appealing.

As for Edie's unconcern with not really having a direction in life, it comes and goes. Some days she's fine with it, and some days she feels completely worthless.

Dean and Seamus! They are so present in the beginning of this story and then they just drop off the face of the planet, mostly because Edie is so terrible with keeping up with friends. But I indeed miss them.

Thanks for the review ♥

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Review #21, by 800 words of heavenJames Potter's Stupid Journal: I See Dead People

11th February 2015:
Heya! I'm finally dropping in for chapter two :)

Gah! I actually love James Potter II as a drama queen. I feel like it fits his need for a little excitement in his life, although getting transported back in time would kind of cover the quota of "exciting things happening" for me.

Sofie is still interesting - there hasn't been a dip since the last chapter. I'd like to get to know her better in the next chapter, though. I feel as if my understanding of her is so superficial when compared to James.

Dumbledore is still crazy. That's good to know. He's about the only person who'd actually believe a time travelling story at face value, although I am glad that he seriously considered the possibility that Sofie was just Sirius in drag. That's totally possible - and far more plausible. Also I love how James' last name is Harrison - I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE.

As for the whole time travelling thing - that is an intriguing mystery indeed. How did they travel so far back and not die? Who set it up? Why did it even happen? So many questions!

Author's Response: Hello again! :D

James II is totally a drama queen. He is related to both Ron and Harry AND James I AND Sirius (albeit distantly)-- there is no universe in which this kid isn't a drama queen. At least to me.

So glad Sofie's still interesting, and I will definitely try to flesh out her out more thoroughly. James is easier to flesh out because he's the narrative voice, but he should be able to describe his best-mate-and-crush fairly well, I think. :)

Dumbledore has, in fact, experienced Sirius in drag thanks to a memorable event in Fourth Year involving the Hufflepuff girls' dormitories, five House Elves, and far too much Butterbeer. It stands to reason it might happen again.

James' last name is brilliant, right? Simple, yet brilliant. ^_^ As for the time travelling questions... well, we'll just have to wait and see, won't we? ^_^

Thanks for the lovely review!

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Review #22, by 800 words of heavenNoodles a la Scorpius: Noodles a la Scorpius

11th February 2015:

This was so cute! Gah! Little Scorpius is so naughty! And adorable!

I'm not a parent but I have a feeling if my toddler did that to my shoes, my reaction would be similar to that of Draco's anger. Shoes are expensive! And not very good houses for toads! Also noodles are nice to eat, not to decorate.

But I couldn't find myself feeling angry with Scorpius as I was reading this. He's just too cute. He just really doesn't like shoes but does enjoy all the other things that any self-respecting four-year-old should like, such as mud and toads and spiders. Draco and Astoria should just be pleased that he enjoys the great outdoors so much, since that's so often a complaint concerning "kids these days". Way to go Scorpius!

I'm looking forward to reading more stories about Scorpius as he grows up. I wonder if he's going to get more rebellious and how Draco is going to react. Looking forward to it :)

Author's Response: Thanks for tagging me! I'm glad you liked it. This one was a lot of fun to write and the others I'm working on are equally entertaining (at least in my opinion as I'm writing them). I hope you'll be back to read the others in the collection as they progress through his life.


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Review #23, by 800 words of heavenA Single Point In Time: 1982

10th February 2015:
Heya! Since the first chapter was so short - as was this one - and my reviews aren't that long either, I thought I'd drop by and review this one as well.

I really admire the way you write complex characters. I don't like Petunia, but I found myself empathising with her just the same. She feels something at the loss of her sister, but she knows the feeling isn't nearly as strong as it should be. She also realises that she could never love Harry the way she loves Dudley, and instead of berating herself, she accepts this as fact and rather feels sorry for Harry. It was interesting to note here that she doesn't blame Harry for their current predicament either. It simply is. Perhaps that resentment comes later?

I also wanted to say something about the descriptions. They're lovely to read. They're simple and subtle complementing the scene without being obtrusive. I love that here, since it's so effective. I can really focus on the characters that way.

Lovely stuff! I'm excited for more :)

Author's Response: Hey again! Thanks for reviewing both of the chapters - it means a lot to have someone look over this one too and it's made me power on with the next chapter!

I love writing characters that aren't really explored as much in the books. Obviously Petunia and Vernon, they're not nice characters because they're so obviously horrible to Harry and I think it would be wrong to portray them nicely. But at the same time they are still characters and they'd have all sorts of mixed and jumbled feelings in-between that nastiness. I don't like Petunia either, but I did want to explore her grief and also her maternal side which she obviously has. I'm glad this chapter worked for you!

Thank you so much for your kind words. It's really encouraging and I'm glad that these two brief chapters were enjoyable and well, made you think! :) Thanks for dropping by to review!

Laura xxx

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Review #24, by 800 words of heavenA Single Point In Time: 1981

10th February 2015:

So this is a super great start! I don't read much stuff written in this time period, but I'm now very intrigued to see what happens.

I really enjoyed this look into Albus' headspace. It's a nice place to explore the inner cogs of a complicated man. You portrayed him with doubts about his decision to leave Harry on the Dursleys' doorstep, as well as exemplified his compassion by having Dumbledore feel concern over the baby's comfort and safety.

I also liked reading his ruminations about what this would mean for their community now. He understands that people are going to celebrate - and that yes this is a reason to celebrate - but he also realises that their hardships have not ended yet. It showed in a rather subtle way that Dumbledore understands the way the world works, and it is because of this understanding that he's able to play the long game so effectively.

A fantastic start! Onto the next chapter :)

Author's Response: Oh wow thank you for your reviews! 2?! You spoil me! :'D

I'm really pleased you liked Dumbledore here. I'm super aware he doesn't really do much but I wanted to show that at this point there's not a lot really that he can do, which is a weird position for him to be in. I agree - I think he's always quite conscious of the devastation of the war. Lily and James' deaths would be playing on his mind just as much as everyone's, really, but I agree that he does have this strange faith-like, logical way of letting things play out in due course.

Thank you for such a lovely review! Laura xxx

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Review #25, by 800 words of heavenMultiverse Theory: Coffee Shop Etude

9th February 2015:
Heya! I saw that you had a new one-shot posted over on the forums and I can't resist a Jily!

Ah! So cute! This AU is a really popular one these days, especially over on tumblr (I'm thinking of getting into the hype myself). I loved the way you wrote this! This is exactly the kind of stuff I love about modern muggle AUs - there's so much room to choose.

The coffee shop route is a familiar one, but I really liked your spin on it. Lily as an aspiring author was a good fit for the character for me, and there's just something about imagining James Potter as a musician... so dreamy. Bonus points for not having James be the barista!

I'm going to keep my eyes on the lookout for your longer Jily modern muggle AU. Awesome read :)

Author's Response: Hiya! Thanks for stopping by. :D

I love reading the AUs on Tumblr, especially for Jily and WolfStar. If you do get into the hype, please let me know! We can squeal about it together. :D There is so much leeway with Muggle AUs that it's almost like writing original fic, but you have set characterizations for the characters. I enjoy it very much. :)

I've read many coffee shop AUs, but for this one, I wanted to add in something of my own experience. I myself am a writer and a musician, so putting those talents in James and Lily was a lot of fun. James Potter would be The Most Popular Musician, if only because of his hair. :) Yep, no barista-customer involvement here. I wanted a different angle.

Thanks! If I finish it tonight, it'll be up by the end of the week. :D


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