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Reading Reviews From Member: tangledconstellations
  
313 Reviews Found

Review #26, by tangledconstellationsMy Identity: My Mythos

21st June 2015:
Heya! ♥

I'm swinging by for review tag!

Gah - this was such an awesome start to your fic. I've been meaning to start reading a good-length fic for a while, and y'know what? I think this is the one I'm gonna go for :) This first chapter alone is so rich in tone and I love the way you've introduced Andromeda. I can see her, I can picture her, and, even though I don't know anything about her current life situation as of yet, I feel invested in her. This opening is really beautifully written. I love the way you intertwine the ancient story of Andromeda with the present. I can picture a girl who is a bit lost, her mind fixed elsewhere, but because she is so actively searching for her true self, as you say, she is also very actively in this world too.

I think what is most interesting is that by mentioning the ancient story you set up a level of foreshadowing. Half of me is expecting the rest of this story to follow alongside the ancient one. In a way, I'm already hoping for her hero to come along, to rescue her from the situation she might find herself in. But the other half of me is so fascinated with the tone you've established here, the sort of pessimistic outlook Andromeda seems to have, and so I'm incredibly excited to see that not happen. I'm excited to see how she makes her own name for herself, and just how her happy ending, that she's so sure she doesn't believe in, won't come about.

This was an awesome first chapter. So much intrigue! I can't wait to read on :)

Laura xxx

Author's Response: Gah, thank you so much.

I am pretty self conscious about this story because I wrote it so long ago, but I am also very proud that it is actually finished (the final three chapters are waiting for the queue).

Because I feel insecure about it I haven't specifically requested any reviews for it, so I am always very flattered when somebody reads it on their own. As you can see, most of the later chapters haven't been reviewed, so if you do keep reading I'd be interested to hear what you think.

Thanks much!

Sam.


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Review #27, by tangledconstellationsTwisting In The Wind: Free

21st June 2015:
Hey there Kaitlin!

I heard it was somebody's birthday ^.- so I scampered over as fast as I could to wish you HAPPY BIRTHDAY KAITLIN ♥ ♥ ♥ I hope you have a BEAUTIFUL DAY filled with smiles (and cake) and presents (and cake) and love (and cake) and BIRTHDAY JOY! (and cake)

Here's a little birthday review to make your day a little brighter!

SO I don't know why I'm reviewing this fic because I swear, all of the entries for Lisa's Sink-Your-Ship challenge have left me in a CRYING MESS on the floor. This was no exception - although the fact that it was written so beautifully has sort of softened the blow. I love Neville and Luna too - they're such a lovely couple, I think because both of them are really gentle characters. It seems fitting that their break up would go like this ~ not too dramatic or angsty, but painful nonetheless. You did a really good job of writing their dynamic, and this was really nice to read!

I hope you have a wonderful day ~ I'm sending lots of hugs and positive birthday vibes! (and cake) ♥

Laura xxx

Author's Response: Hey Laura,

Thank you so much! It really made my day to log on and see all these lovely reviews. Don't worry. I got lots of cake!

I'm sorry that the challenge entries have been hard for you. You're right that Luna and Neville are both gentle characters and that's why I imagine their breakup being very mellow. I'm so glad you thought the dynamic was fitting.

Thank you so much for this lovely review and the birthday wishes!

~Kaitlin


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Review #28, by tangledconstellationsRose Tinted Glass: Paper World

20th June 2015:
Hey there,

Just popping by to leave a random review :) this was so lovely - it totally made me melt. I'm not normally into romance but I love how this was also bound up in self image, and sort of 'loving yourself'. I like the way Scorpius is different to how he's normally portrayed. He's a free spirit here, and that's really nice. But I especially love how much he loves Rose, and how he can see that she is wonderful.

Sorry this is short, but this was really lovely - thank you for sharing! ♥

Laura xxx

Author's Response: Hi Laura! Thanks so much for this review! It really did brighten my day :)

I really like as a sort of therapeutic device, so that's a little bit of where this kind of came from. And Scorpius, he's just wonderful, so there's that too.

Anyway, thanks for the review!!

Stefanie


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Review #29, by tangledconstellationsSelene: Selene

20th June 2015:
Hey there,

I'm swinging by for Review Tag! ♥

I've been meaning to pop by your author's page for a while now, and I'm really pleased that I have because I thought this piece was so wonderful. When I realised that Selene was a boggart, I swear, my heart simultaneously broke and was filled with such, idk, awe? that you had written such a wonderful piece. This oneshot is so original and its so convincing, and you've managed to turn a fearsome creature, one that we all don't like from the series, into something that's real, that's breathing and that has a soul.

Your narrative here is perfectly simple. That's what makes it so effective - you haven't overdone the details, and everything is just-so. The way Selene views things is so sort of absent - she's not really a part of the world, she's not quite human - yet she (he? it? 'It' doesn't feel right!) has these emotions that makes her more than a creature to be hated. Your final few lines were the lines that got me - Teddy, seeing his father. And Selene, feeling that grief, in a way, too, and not being able to change shape. It makes me wonder whether people hated her for that - whether it made them view her as a 'horrible nasty boggart' for making Teddy cry, but what they don't know is that in a way Selene was hurting, too. This was just amazing.

I'm really looking forwards to seeing what other stories you post in the future! Thank you so much for sharing this!

Laura xxx

Author's Response: Hi Laura and thank you for this heart-warming review! It certainly brightened an otherwise frustrating day.

I'm incredibly happy that you liked the idea and my style of writing (simple is always the way for me, I really envy the people who can write in flowery language and still pull it off!) I was originally planning to end the story differently, but as I was writing, this idea popped into my head and I couldn't resist penning it down! I love your take on the ending, though, for people wouldn't have understood why the boggart refused to change and would have probably antagonised Selene for it.

Impossibly grateful for this review, darling, and I should hope to be writing more in the near future!


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Review #30, by tangledconstellationsGloria: Gloria

20th June 2015:
Hey Aph!

I swear, every single thing you write is so incredibly epic, so amazingly put together and orchestrated and carefully thought out, it just takes my breath away. All of your references, the multi-layered and colourful images you paint with your words, the feelings arching through this piece, all of it.

This was beautiful. Not even beautiful, BEYOND beautiful. Sort of, scarily otherworldly and inspiring all wrapped up. It was like drifting off into a dream in the corner of a warm library and slipping into another world. Just ~ insanely, crazily good. I am in absolute awe. And I'm aware I'm not doing a good job at putting my thoughts into words right now and I hope my feeble attempts aren't creating the wrong impression. I'm rambling, but I mean this all so sincerely. This is pure poetry.

When we agreed to swap you mentioned that this was pretty long - but actually, reading this, it didn't feel too long at all. Perhaps it was the way you've divided this into each of their separate narratives, but it sort of split it up in quite an easy to manage way. I don't normally mind reading longer things anyway providing I've set time apart to do it, but this didn't feel particularly heavily long as I was reading. Maybe I was just utterly swept up in it! But I do think this works so well as one long continuous piece. It sort of solidifies what Gellert and Albus are - one intense companionship, one that you've (rather carefully (and evilly? (Curse Lisa's challenge! It's breaking my heart!!))) dismantled throughout the course of this.

The main thing I really wanted to emphasise in this review is just how effective Gellert's ascension to power is. Maybe not even power in the literal sense - perhaps just in their relationship, because it is through this facet that you have told their story. Every time a new sort of subsection started it felt as though he was slipping further away and Albus was starting to view him, yes, with a sort of affection still, but a new reverence that signals warning bells in his (and my) head and which eventually means that they cannot be. Yet in Gellert's sections I could almost feel him trying to claw his way back to Albus, especially in the last one, when his language becomes so accusing and hard - 'your damp, pretty England' literally mentioning a 'crown of thorns'. While there is a romance between them there's also a definite dependence/envy of one another, as though they complete and better each other yet compete - which I think is what makes their relationship, generally speaking, really fascinating. They're both incredibly bright men (understatement of the century) and they want to get better, and if it is Albus that motivates him, Gellert is going to want to cling and keep him. But perhaps it is because Albus is the better man that he can't stay with Gellert for the things that he's done - I don't know. But you've done an incredible job at untangling their relationship. You've laid it out in all of these hues and you've created such a beautiful, visual selection of moments to represent it - it's just amazing.

Okay, so now I'm going to ATTEMPT to talk about your writing itself. Watch as I go off on an emotional tangent... Ok so I have always always always loved your writing. You're one of the handful of writers on this archive who I read every once in a while and I flail and I weep (with joy? with pain? who knows?) and I feel so inspired to open up my word docs and poke at my own stories some more. Maybe you know that, but I don't know if I've said it before. It's so special to read someones work and be actually blown away by it. For me, it's not so much the story (though the story here is incredible) but it's the way it's told that reaches out to me. Writing is such an art and it's literally the best thing in the entire universe when I can see that there is another writer out there who is wrestling with this art and using their own voice and making their words their own, making them original and telling a story how they need to and in a way that they feel does it best. I always get a feeling from your work that you're writing because you're motivated by feelings and situations that are so difficult to put into words but you need to TRY because that's what writing is, right? This piece is packed with such gorgeous, emotive and loaded language but what is so unique is that you have written it. I read this and I loved it and I know it is in your voice, your style, your rhythm. Another favourite of mine that you have written is Two Earthly Kingdoms, and there are some parallels between these pieces, but only in such a way that it is evident you have written them. You've left your mark on the words, and you've made them your own. I genuinely read your work and I feel like one day in the future I'll pick up a book in a shop and glance over it and I'll recognise your beautiful style, I'll know that you have written it because that's what you do - you make words your own.

I hope you know how talented you are. I hope you know that reading your work is special and that it creates these beautiful, mesmerising worlds for the reader. You have such a skill and its amazing to be able to be a part of it on this site ♥

I just glanced at my character count and Holy Heck I'm on less than 500 - I feel like I should have PM'd you that last paragraph but heyho. THINGS I NEED TO MENTION BEFORE I RUN OUT:
India - the sea as a painting - mint waves - JUST SPECTACULAR. I can see the brushstrokes
Midas in his hall of gold - an amazing, almost terrifying image. Everything is so real/unreal
Blackberries growing sour - I love this - even though they feel immortal like statues and gods, they will fade & change - they are merely of the earth too
Keep writing - always ♥

Ok ok I'm almost out of letters! Sorry for this absolutely insane lame review, but thank you for writing this.

YOU ARE LITERALLY AMAZING. ♥

Thank you

Laura xxx

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Review #31, by tangledconstellationsWalking in Circles: Walking in Circles

20th June 2015:
Heya! Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015!

This was really cool - I love the idea of this piece and I think you wrote it really well. It's the kind of piece that I imagine should have a soundtrack to it :D - and while it's pretty standalone its given me just enough to think about to get involved in the characters. I love the way the Hufflepuff team keep passing Al by, and he's still as deeply preoccupied in his thoughts. It's a really nice touch and implies the passing of time without actually explicitly saying it. I like the way he is meandering his way around the lake, too - because obviously it is symbolic, like you say in your last line. He's in a cyclic state of mind and the walking around the lake thing is very habitual. But its really cool that at the conclusion of the piece he decides he doesn't want to do that any more - and even though we don't know much about the characters other than what you've given us here you really set up his relationship with Pam really well, and I'm rooting for them at the end.

This is just really nice to read - it's ever so well balanced and I love the way the story pans out here.

:D Laura xxx

Author's Response: Thanks for coming by! I'm glad you enjoyed this. I think I wrote this story right at the beginning of the period when I was getting overly stressed about writing, trying to insert bits of symbolism or small metaphors or significant but subtle themes into everything. This story wasn't particularly subtle in its symbolism, but it's nice to hear that you think it worked. Maybe I'll go back and take a look at it at some point, and see if I could make it a little better. Thank you, and go 'claws!

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Review #32, by tangledconstellationsYou. (Me).: You. (Me).

20th June 2015:
Heya! I'm reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015.

This was so beautiful. It was such a perfect length, and I love the lingering contrasts between how Teddy and Victoire view her beauty. I like the way you alternated between both of their voices - how both of them spoke in their own way. From Teddy I can feel a really wholehearted enthusiasm and passion for Victoire, but I think what is really special is the way Victoire comes across as almost tired of who she is and how she looks. She is doubting herself, who she is behind the 'mask' of her beauty. It's such an interesting stance to take, because it makes me think about who she is as a character - does she hate how she looks? How does that play into the rest of her life? But because this piece is so fleeting and brief, in the most gentle way, those questions hang in the air, unanswered.

The whole tone of this is really cool because your use of colour in the early descriptions paint this bright and vivid portrayal of who Victoire is, but her own tone and her own view on herself almost over saturates it until we are seeing more than how she looks. Yet, to have Teddy clinging on to her sentences once they have been said adds this wistful edge to the piece, that makes me think a lot of love - of loving someone when they don't love themselves and seeing a different kind of beauty within them.

This was really amazing - thank you for sharing ♥

Laura xxx

Author's Response: Hi Laura!

I'm so pleased that you enjoyed this piece! And coming from someone who writes the most beautiful stories and descriptions, that really means a lot to hear! I was trying to do something a bit different with this story - especially since I hadn't been writing fanfiction for long at this point - and I'm so pleased that it worked and that the characterisations of Victoire and Teddy fit too.

I really wanted to explore some different questions and a different side to beauty, and even though I didn't have many words to do that in, it was great to leave those questions hanging for the reader to ask and answer themselves. Thank you so much for this wonderful review! ♥


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Review #33, by tangledconstellationsScars: Introduction: It Only Takes A Moment

20th June 2015:
Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015!

There is only one chapter of this? Noo! But this is so exciting! This is such an awesome first chapter!

I am so keen to read more, even though, from way Fenrir hesitated over the photo of Remus, I think things aren't going to go well. This was such a captivating first chapter, I can't emphasise that enough - I already feel involved in your writing style and the character of John...I'm gonna be super annoying and ask, will you ever update this again?

Your descriptions here are awesome because they're not too heavy. You give us enough to imply the setting and the way the characters are feeling, but it's not overwhelming. You write movement and interaction between characters really well, but at the same time you've still managed to set up the world around the characters and imply a backstory already. It's interesting that you've started with Remus as a child, because I think that will help us understand teenage-Remus when we come across him in later chapters. I'm just... eek, you don't know how badly I want to click 'next chapter'! I'm both captivated by your writing and frightened about what's going to come for the Lupin family. This was an awesome start!

Laura xxx

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Review #34, by tangledconstellationsNightmare: Nightmare

20th June 2015:
Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015

Hey Grace,

I was super intrigued by the summary for this, and I admit, I do love me some angsty Severus. This was really cool, and really freaky, as well. I thought the way Severus is constantly plagued by this vision was really cool, because along with all his other general-angst (he's such an emo kid) this was just another thing to distract him, to make him even more flawed. I thought it was great.

The way he seems to be physically reacting to his nightmares was the thing that got to me, because it reminded me a lot of how when you wake up from a nightmare you have that moment of 'omg its not over' until you realise that, well, it is :P but I like the idea of that embedded fear staying with him. Whether it's really there or not I don't know, but that's what makes it feel scarier - is it real, is it not? When you combine that with the fact that at the end Sev is awakened by Charity Burbage it's just so scary and effective - because even if it's not real, even if she's not there, he's so afraid of what he's done that it feels like a wound. That in itself is terrifying.

This was really good and I think you did an awesome job on the freaky-front!

Laura xxx

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Review #35, by tangledconstellationsBrother's Blood: Tale of a fool: Brother's Blood

20th June 2015:
Hey!

Swinging by for BvB Review Battle :)

I haven't read any of your stories in a while, so it was good to have a look over your author's page again!

This was really powerful, and really well written. I really like the length of this; I think it works so well as a shorter piece because it makes the impact a lot greater and makes the words you have used that much more cutting. This was just such a powerful, bitter and painful piece - in the best possible way. It was packed with emotion and I could feel Albus' regrets. I felt like I was inside his mind, along with this hissing voice that reminds him of his worst decisions. This was so good though. The tone of this is really effective, and, coupled with the visceral descriptions of the blood, and the scathing tone of voice, really transported me as the reader.

Even though we weren't really in a location, if you know what I mean, I feel like you've told a story here and have built up more about Albus' character. I love looking at the darker side of his character - the things that he perhaps didn't do right. Or maybe he did ~ who is to say?

Anyway you've got me ruminating on Dumbledore now xD but this was awesome!

Laura xxx

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Review #36, by tangledconstellationsThis is How You Love Her: This is How You Love Her

20th June 2015:
Heya again!

Reviewing for Ravenclaw for the House Cup 2015 :)

For someone that hates action, I think you did a pretty swell job at writing it! This was really effective - I think the thing that works so well here is that there is a balance of action but also of Cedric's contemplation. The writing is very in-the-moment but you also manage to include just enough of his thoughts to remind us that there are weights and considerations outside of this instinctual moment, the urge to 'win' the cup. It really warms my heart to read how Cedric feels about Cho. I love them as a couple, I love all of their awkward, blossoming teenage feelings for each other, and the way they're both still kids. But there's a real sense of how headstrong Cedric is here, the way he's willing to pack in being the champion for Cho. It's really lovely, and I think if Cedric had lived (*sob*) he would have been such a family man.

Your writing, again, is awesome, and it's been really cool to read this only moments after reading 'Darkness'. There's a definite shift in tone for obvious reasons but you've still got such a clear style. You're always really coherent with what it is you're saying and describing and adopt the tone of your character so well. Just - yeah - sorry for being the lamest fangirl ever. But this was great - and it's fantastic to see inside Cedric's head here.

Laura xxx

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Review #37, by tangledconstellationsDarkness: Darkness

20th June 2015:
Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015.

Hey there,

I have always been secretly and eternally in love with everything you write ever since I signed up to HPFF, and to me this was no exception to the incredible caliber of things you post here - I thought this was just wonderful. You're such an amazing writer it literally blows me away, haha. I love the tone of this piece, the way it's gentle and absent but at the same time there is an underlying feeling of urgency. I love that you've taken a character we hardly know in the books, except that he is a 'villain' and created a whole world around him, his wife, his unborn child. Its amazing - this was amazing - and this just worked so well together.

I love how you've broke up the paragraphs, the way they are short segments into this woman's life. In a way it makes me as the reader feel distant from her, but in a way that it suggests that she is not exactly close to herself, too. Her feelings are changing so often, so not-quite-certain that it really hurts my heart. She is sort of so lost - and the way you describe her need for being a mother, but not quite being 'there' yet - its amazing. I feel really passionately about the domestication of women in the home, the way there is this ultimate standard of 'woman' and of 'mother' and this piece really spoke to me. Your lines have rhythm and there's such a sense of poetry throughout this piece. I really loved this, and I'm definitely favouriting.

Thank you for sharing! This was amazing ♥

Laura xxx

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Review #38, by tangledconstellationsFreshly Mown Grass: Freshly Mown Grass

20th June 2015:
Heya!

Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015 :)

This story made me laugh, because it's such a lovely and pure snippet between Ron and Hermione. It was really enjoyable to read, and I love how its linked to 'freshly mown grass' in the series. I love how teenagery they are, how Ron is perfectly in character with his 'why-me' attitude in response to his mother, and the way Hermione abandons her usual bustling and logical nature to just have a moment of appreciation! :P This was so lovely though. I love the way Ginny is amused by Hermione, but she's not mean about it. And I really like the way you've described Ron, because it would be so wrong if he was super hunky. I feel like this piece is really true to their characters, so thank you for sharing this, because you've really done them justice here.

Your descriptions are so good here - I feel like every word has been carefully chosen, but the overall effect is so effortless. You're such a good writer because not one line here feels false or out of place. I liked the way you described Hermione hesitating on the step and lowering her foot back down - idk, it was just a little detail, but it really stuck out for me as being so fluidly written.

I really liked this - thank you for sharing because this was great :)

Laura xxx

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Review #39, by tangledconstellationsOur Brand of Normal : Chapter Two

20th June 2015:
Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015

Whoo! So this chapter did not disappoint!

First of all, some things that I immediately ♥-ed in like the first 4 paragraphs -- your mc is in Hufflepuff! I know I'm Ravenclaw and all but...Hufflepuff ftw! I love seeing them lead stories! And: your mc ISN'T in the Wotter clan - yay for their being other students at Hogwarts, hehe! I love being able to see how other people view the next-gen kids! Also - NEWSLETTER TEAM. This idea is so great!! And there's already a bit of healthy rivalry between your mc and Mia ~ I feel invested already!

Ah okay so I love that chapter provided a lot more groundwork than the one before and it was really good! I love that already we've learnt enough about Charlotte for her to be interesting to us and for us to want to carry on reading. She's got a strong character this far and I like that she's not totally perfect because she's way more relatable this way. I also like Al's character because he's quite different to how I've read him before. I like that he's a bit of a popular kid - perhaps a bit of confident/jokery type person? But the main thing that I fell in love with about this chapter was the way your mc is clearly seperate from the Weasley's and the Potter's, and is maybe quite bitter about it?. In a way they sort of have this unattainable status that no one else can quite match, because they are famous. I'm excited to see this explored because it's a unique take on Next-Gen. I'm keen to see where this goes!

I really liked this chapter, and I hope you do manage to post the next chapter soon! :D

Laura xxx

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Review #40, by tangledconstellationsOur Brand of Normal : Chapter One

20th June 2015:
Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015

Hey there!

What an intriguing first chapter! I have so many questions, and, as I clicked on this story to read this chapter, I spotted that you'd *just* posted the second one. Good times! I can't wait to read on!

This works so well as an introduction, especially as who the narrator is is unclear up until Al says 'Charlotte,' and the reason they're writing articles is unknown...but despite all of these things we don't know yet, there's an incredible amount of tension hanging in the air, and it's really exciting! I love the way your narrator is ruminating on what is 'normal' - it sets up the possibility for all sorts of changes to occur within the characters and foreshadows a really interesting story. I like that the approach you've taken is really contemplative - your character is definitely looking back in this first chapter (and the whole, 'I don't know where I stand with him' line is so tantalizing like you can't even believe!!!) and I'm really keen to see if this view portrayed in this chapter is going to be in the next one, or if there's going to be a difference, and we can expect Charlotte in the next chapter to grow into the Charlotte here. Anyway, this was a really awesome way to start this fic, and I'm looking forwards to seeing the ways in which your characters are going to defy and define 'normal'.

I'm excited!!

Laura xxx

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Review #41, by tangledconstellationsNoise: Noise

20th June 2015:
Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015!

Ahh, this was so good!

I feel like, because Neville is one of those characters that you want to bundle up forever and make him happy always, having him as the victim of a werewolf bite is one of the meanest things you could have done :P But this was amazing. I really like the way you've written this - the way its in short, sharp moments - kind of like the distinguisable, key scents Neville can suddenly pick out. The moments are so clearly defined and so prominent, and everything else has faded into the background. I also really like the way you've included the relationship between Neville and his Gran, because she was essentially like a mother to him (even though he kinda feared her wrath I guess, haha) - but it made this piece even more about Neville, even more about his emotions and the things and people that are close to him.

I really liked the way you described his first transformation. I could really imagine him there, solitary, freaking out, knowing it's going to happen and trying to counter that with all of the happiest, most confidence-giving things he can remember. Including Neville thinking about Lupin was a really nice touch because in a way it made this partly about him too - about anyone that has to undergo the transformations. Having innocent and lovely Neville - who we all care about from the books - having to go through makes this such a unique piece.

I really liked this - thank you for sharing!

Laura xxx

Author's Response: I know. I'm terrible. But I got Neville in the Lycanthropy Challenge, so I had to do it! But he will overcome it, no matter how bleak this story was.

Writing the bits with his gran were almost more tragic than writing the bits with Neville himself. She's suffered so much tragedy herself and then to do this...well it was really mean of me.

I'm glad you liked the pacing! It was something new for me to try out, but I feel like it worked. Very happy it came off that way to you, too.

I've written transformation scenes before so I wanted to make this one stand out. After a while they seem to get repetitive. I'm glad you enjoyed it! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing! :)


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Review #42, by tangledconstellationsThe Simplest of Words: Regrets

20th June 2015:
Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015 :)

Gah - hey again!

MY HEARTT!! Sirius :( This was such a great chapter, to have Sirius at 'home', like he says, with his friends and surrounded by the things that make him feel the safest. I was so happy when he was there, with his friends - their little jibes at each other and that general air of being carefree and being young - but ugh, it's just so hard that all of his sort of present-tense emotions are with him. It would be so much easier if he could return to that memory sort of be blissfully ignorant. Maybe then it wouldn't hurt him so much. The final paragraph made me feel so sad for him. Your descriptions really let me visualise his hurt - his almost physical pain at the things he knows now and didn't then.

Is there going to be any more of this story? I really like the approach you have taken here, following Sirius through the veil. I hope we can see into his mind even more because I think you've captured his character really well. He loves his friends so much - he is so brave I think, but having him look back on his life, on his weaknesses like this, obviously it must be so hard for him.

This was another awesome chapter, and I really hope there will be more!

Laura xxx

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Review #43, by tangledconstellationsThe Simplest of Words: Prologue

20th June 2015:
Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015!

Heyy,

As a self-confessed Sirius fangirl, this was so difficult for me to read! Even in the books, I find it so difficult for me to read Sirius' last moments (especially with Harry all like, 'c'mon, Sirius - he's just behind the veil!' *cry*). It was really unique to be able to read this moment from Sirius' perspective, and kind of doubly heartbreaking that Sirius is aware of Harry's anguish as soon as it happens. Despite this being really painful, though, this was also written really well and gave oomph to his last moments. Maybe it's the perspective, the way we're not quite in Sirius' head but we're in tune to his feelings - it just makes this moment feel really alive, and so when that is taken away from us, especially in the last paragraph when his 'eyelids begin to droop', it feels all the more powerful, and yet all the more inevitable.

I really liked the way this piece was so Sirius. I think you wrote him really well. This is clearly later Sirius, second-War Sirius, after he's spent that long time in Azkaban and has changed. He's aware of everything that's going on, he's not overrun with deep emotions or anything, but he's still very conscious. I think perhaps because it's Bellatrix he's fighting with so passionately its that which is keeping him awake. And it's in his last moments that he realises the importance of the people around him who care about him - which makes the conclusion of this chapter so strong.

This was awesome, and I'm excited about reading on!

Laura xxx

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Review #44, by tangledconstellationsA Time of Heartache and Healing: Failure

20th June 2015:
Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015.

Hey,

Well, this was just the saddest thing in the world :( But at the same time, even though this was so sad, it was also so incredibly beautiful because I think you've really captured the absolute depth of despair that a mother losing her child would feel. I can't even imagine it, but it must be so awful, and Molly must feel so, so awful. Almost incomprehensibly so. I think what makes this all the more painful is the fact that she absolutely blames herself. She really feels as though she's let everyone down and even though it's so important for her to remember that her children will grow up and become their own adults, you've shown through this piece that right now, she just can't. That's something that is impossible for her to do.

Having Arthur arrive and join her in the bathroom - I sort of thought this would be the kind of situation where she feels a bit better - but because she didn't feel better and because the pain didn't recede - I think that's what made this so, so powerful. You haven't brushed lightly on the topic, you've really shown how crippling this experience is and that makes it more realistic. It makes me feel like Molly is a real person right in front of me - and the way she even feels guilty being with Arthur, her husband who loves her, it's just so sad. Grief is such a complicated and difficult thing to describe and to pinpoint but in this piece you've done a remarkable job. There's something beautifully human about your writing. This just feels so real and even though its sad, it's incredible, too.

I really like the way you've written this - the descriptions of her tears and sobbing, her emotions - it corresponds to the pacing of the piece, the way time for her slips quite quickly but also slowly. It's as though in a way things are so out of her control.

Crickey - even though this was SO sad it was so beautiful too. Thank you for sharing. This was so beautifully written!

Laura xxx

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Review #45, by tangledconstellationsHeart(less): Heart(less)

20th June 2015:
Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015.

Heya!

Lucius and Narcissa are my all-time favourite canon couple. I really feel like there's a wealth of emotion and so many stories between them, and so, naturally, I had to read this. This was absolutely fantastic, and I am in awe of how effective and powerful this was! I loved the structure, the way you stagger their moments, the way some are a few lines long and they transport you to a new place, whereas others are just fleeting little moments. This was honestly like poetry. It reminded me of a broken, jarring movie real - showing moments that aren't quite full, or are... it was just awesome.

I really like the way you've characterised Narcissa here. She's the character out of the two of them that fascinates me the most. I do always see in her a woman who is just so loyal to her family, who has so much faith in the power of the three of them, that it sort of overcomes all other doubts. But at the same time, here she did have doubts. You let her be human, you let her panic and worry - but, the line that got me - through it all she had a 'heart that refused to break'. She is strong, and I love how you've written her so much.

But then this in itself makes me think about your title, and how it ties in to this whole piece. Heartless. Is she heartless? Or has she been hollowed out from everything that has happened to them? I love the way the title adds an extra facet to this piece. It's so cleverly done, and just adds to what I see is the mystery of the Malfoys. Thank you for sharing this on the archive - it was brilliant.

Laura xxx

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Review #46, by tangledconstellationsBall Date: Proposals

20th June 2015:
Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015!

Yayy I love this!

This is such a happy/carefree idea, and Ginny is my absolute favourite so this story makes me super excited. I love that, while Harry and Ron are off whining about the Yule Ball, she actually really secretly wants to go, and I love that the fiery, funny element of her character was present here (especially in her feeling better that Ron had not yet got a date - classic Ginny :P) I also really liked that there was plenty of Hermione and Ginny time. I guess mainly because the series is from Harry's POV it's quite difficult to gauge how close friends they were. I've always imagined that they did hang out a lot and it was sort of really refreshing to just see them talking about normal girl stuff, like what to wear, how to do their makeup, that sort of thing. I'm really looking forwards to seeing more of Hermione's character, as well as seeing how you interpret Ginny in later chapters!

Neville was super cute in this too. It's really interesting seeing him through another set of eyes that aren't Harry's. I like that this first chapter isn't overly heavy. It's a snippet of a canon event that is mentioned only really in passing, so it's a real privilege to have it extended like this. I hope you find the time to add more to this story too because I think this is going to be a really interesting read. Yay for Ginny!

This was great!

Laura xxx

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Review #47, by tangledconstellationsRediscovery: i. stolen glances

19th June 2015:
Heya,

Wow, this is a super cool first chapter! I love the idea of Scorpius working in a library, it's really satisfying somehow - perhaps because I don't imagine Draco would ever do the same :P I love the way Scorpius spoke here - he comes across as quite sharp and catty, but obviously we know that inside his head he's totally freaking out about not letting on that he was watching Hugo! I suspect this is a guise he's put up - and their quite cutting exchange a moment ago is really exciting, and makes me keen to see how the rest of their interactions will go.

You've set up a number of questions in this chapter, which is always good because now I'm looking forwards to read on. Why is Huge reading up on transfiguration? Is there a reason Scorpius has got a sort of barrier here? I love that already his thoughts are lingering on Hugo though, as though he's drawn to him and he doesn't *really* know why.

This was a great first chapter and I'm excited to see where it will go in c2! Thanks for sharing! :D

Laura xxx

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Review #48, by tangledconstellationsBlind: Blind

19th June 2015:
Heya Vicki!

I've been meaning to swing by and leave you a review after you reviewed High Romance for the BvB! Thank you btw - your review was so lovely! ♥ I'm so bad at responding to reviews because I never know what to say but it made me so happy - thank you loads *^-^*

But okay, THIS. YOU HAVE CREATED SO MUCH EMOTIONAL TURMOIL IN MY HEART RIGHT HERE. I was reading this like, this is so beautiful! Everything is okay! Rose isn't with Scorpius, she's with Teddy (my otp btw!), everything is perfect and I'm so happy for them and they're getting married...and then it hit me that she was just a guest and I was like, noo!! Stop!! And then as I was reading I was sort of like, is it too late for Rose to stand up and be like, I OBJECT!? There's a chance, she can totally take it!! But she didn't and just... ugh :( she loves Teddy so much. And this is so powerful because there's such a boundary here, the way she doesn't want to approach that family/not family issue even though she does love him.

I think what is most special about this is the fact that she doesn't take the chance and she doesn't speak up. She knows what she wants but she doesn't know what *he* wants and to her that's far more important. She is punishing herself for not realising it sooner - but that's so sad because she can't change that. I feel like you've explored her character so much here, even though this was quite brief, and I get a sense of the way she thinks and feels. I really want to read more! As a moment this is so good, but I really think you have such a wealth of emotions tucked in here, and I just want to gorge on them. Hahaha :D

Your writing is as beautiful as it always is. You adopt the tone of this piece so fluidly, and I really do feel like we are seeing this through Rose's eyes. There are so many wonderful hesitations here (which at first I thought were because of Rose's nerves about getting married! Oh how wrong I was!) and so many subtle, powerful descriptions. I love how the whole process of Teddy reaching the altar is quite slow - you've written it in a really meaningful and deliberate way because that is exactly how Rose is seeing it - slowly, because she almost wants it to just come to a *stop*.

Thank you for sharing this. It was really beautiful. But now I need to go and nurse my broken heart back to health... ♥

Laura xxx

Author's Response: Hi Laura! You're welcome! It was an amazing piece of writing - you writing is incredible! and don't worry about it, i'm just as bad at responding!

I'm sorry! I didn't mean it, I promise! Yes for it being your otp, it's mine too! I'm sorry, I would love for them to be together but the banner gave me feels for a tragic, emotional roller coaster story and this was born! I couldn't have her stand up because I just couldn't imagine her doing it - in my head, she hates hurting people and just wouldn't do this to him or Victoire or everyone at the wedding. She'd rather hold her tongue and keep her feelings to herself.

Yes! That's another reason I didn't have her object. She knows her feelings but she doesn't want to ruin anything in case he doesn't feel the same and the whole upset would be for nothing and she's too family orientated. Haha, I would love to expand on this in the future, you never know! Or I will just give you more Rose/Teddy heartbreak!

Thank you, that means a lot coming from you! I'm seriously blushing!

Thank you for such an amazing review Laura and i'm sorry for breaking your heart!

-Vicki


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Review #49, by tangledconstellationsMoment of Clarity: In These Walls

19th June 2015:
Reviewing for the BvB battle!

How is it that I'm always in tears when I read your writing? Your writing is such a pleasure to read, you phrase everything so well, and you build up the emotions in just the right way to absolutely break my heart. Normally I'm such a stoical person when it comes to getting emotional over fics, I do like to enthuse but often they don't really *get* to me, as in, I appreciate them fully in the moment. But everything of yours that I've read so far has just got to me so much. I was thinking about Jumping off Swings for days. You write about the really special and sad topics and moments that catch you off guard in the books, but recreate them and embellish them in such a unique way, in your own style. This was amazing, really, really. Thank you for sharing this because it was just wonderful. ♥

I love the way you reveal things here - the way it comes slowly and we too as the reader have this sense of being very disoriented. I was very confused when the blonde girl came in - once I'd realised this was Alice (because at first I was like, is this Lily? Is this in the afterlife?) I was trying to find other people to connect to her, and I really loved being in that position. I loved that I didn't know at what point in time I was reading this (for a while I thought this might be set just after their mission, and that from here on their recovery was going to stop) because it made me hang on to every line you gave me. And the way Neville and Frank, and Nevilles baby and Neville himself - the way they're all sort of interchangeable for a while, and you don't know who is who, because Alice doesn't know who is who just yet... and then it just hits you, so gently and carefully. This was just such an amazing chapter. Once I clocked onto it (maybe I'm slow, idk?) I started welling up, and I was just in absolute awe of this piece. The concept for this piece is so beautiful.

The tone as well is really satisfying - like, you do describe Alice seeing things through a sort of mist, but even before you included that description I definitely got a sense of that. Everything seems blurry, but bright, in this very pure way. I like that, despite Alice not fully knowing where she is, none of this feel claustrophobic - Alice isn't trapped or struggling, she's just sort of slowly coming to terms with everything and very gradually seeing. I think if you had emphasised the walls, the floor, the not-knowing this would have become a very different piece. Instead though, I like the approach you've got here. I feel like Alice is sort of relatively in control here. Even though she doesn't *know* and she's been absent for such a long time, this fic is very empowering because she's starting to understand.

This moment (of clarity!) was amazing to read. It gives me so much hope for the whole family which is something they need, so much. Thank you for sharing this. You've managed to break my heart and put it back together again in about ~3000 words. I am such a fan of your writing -- AND I'm so happy it was you that posted in BvB last! :P Thank you ♥

Laura xxx

Author's Response: Hey Laura!

I have always loved focusing on moments of emotions or events that make you feel things that you didn't know you could feel. I also adore characters that are tragic in nature and ones that aren't always given the time or characterization that they sometimes deserve. That's led to things like this, or Jumping Off Swings, and they're stories that I just can't help to write because once the ideas come, I can't get them to go away. I'm just happy I'm able to share these stories and for having them come out how I want them and have people be able to feel for these characters and enjoy them in addition to what they see in the books.

This piece specifically, I had to carefully construct. It's difficult to pull off a character who knows and doesn't know at the same time. It's also difficult when you have characters who seem interchangable with one another to the main character, especially when as the writer, you want it clear who is present and who isn't present. Which isn't the easiest thing to do, as I learned. That said, the blonde is actually Luna, as I have Neville/Luna with thier son in here. Which wasn't very clear here and also not necessarily key to the plot, but...yeah.

I'm glad Alice's view of the world, being cloudy but clear, came across as I inteded it to. I do wonder if the reappraoch into the haze, and into not knowing is as evident as I intended. May be something I look into. Also glad I got away from teh claustrophobic feeling. I kind of feared I'd stray into it, and it definately would take away from the point I wanted to highlight.

Thank you so, so much for this lovely review! You've read all of my most recent writes, with this new style that I've recently been testing out and it seems like it's working out well! I'm glad you've enjoyed and I can't thank you enough for leaving such sweet reviews! They make my day!

Thanks again, Laura!
-Mikaela


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Review #50, by tangledconstellationsShadows of War: Prologue: August 2001

8th June 2015:
Heya!

Swinging by once more the BvB review battle! :D

I was really excited about reading this after reading Jumping off Swings (which you already know how much I loved! ♥). I thought this looked really interesting because I find the Malfoy family fascinating post-war, and I'm looking forward to seeing where you take this.

This was such a great introduction to the story to come. The narrative voice is so fiery and so headstrong but there's also an element of self-doubt in there too. As I assume this is Astoria, I think letting her have that kind of personality is really cool, especially as it's going to eventually blend with Draco's story, too. There are already questions I want answering (why was she disowned? Is Daphne okay?) which is awesome and I feel invested in what's to come. Even though this was a short intro, a lot has been set up and I have a real feel for the style of the universe you're writing in.

I love how reading this chapter feels as though there's going to be an epic story to come. I can feel that there's going to be drama and pain and already I have confidence that you'll guide the reader there seamlessly. I don't know - there's just something really emotive about this intro and it's just incredibly exciting. I think this is a wonderful start and your writing is just beautiful.

Awesome stuff! :D

Laura xxx

Author's Response: Hey Laura!

Made me smile to see you back to read another one of the stories I was really proud about writing. This and Jumping Off Swings are some of my most favorite pieces that I have written, so it's great to see people reading them!

Astoria was a character that came quite natrually for me to write. I just kind of knew her attitude towards things, being almost bitter at times and always headstrong. It fit so well with her image in my head. And, of course, her voice being the voice of reason in this is going to be really interesting. I'm not quite sure how things will play out, but the general plot line I'm following should bring up a lot of things.

I also wrote this with the intention of leaving questions, of having people come back and be like, so...initially this was said...how'd it happen? I love cliff hangers and when you get that 'I can't put this down' feeling. Best part about reading and actually pretty fun to write as well!

Really glad you enjoyed this story! It was a fun one to write! Hope to see you back for more (and hopefully my muse cooperates to write more)!

Thanks again for the review!
-Mikaela


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