WOW. This was amazing, and powerful, and emotional. Poor Draco, he needs a hug (preferably from moi!). I even want to say poor Lucius, and heretofore I hated him!
VERY well done, 10/10.Author's Response: This is one of the nicest reviews I have had :)
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
- Innocent Luminere Report Review
Hermione seems quite out-of-character; I don't think she would react that well to this series of confusing events. I also think that their relationship/friendship is moving way too quickly to be believable--especially since Draco has his memories back, and has years-old hatred for Hermione to overcome. Other than that, I liked :)Author's Response: yes I agree 100%! I have to tell you, this is actually one of my least favorites chapters just because of how quickly their relationship came about. I'm actually thinking about re-writing it and making it longer to help that problem out. That way their change will be gradually, not so quick and sudden like it is now. I'm not positive though if I should do it or not though. Could you possibly let me know what you think? Since you can't reply to this could you answer on another website? I have all the websites I'm on at my author's page.
If you can't do that or you are not comfortable with that I totally understand. Thanks anyways :)
But thank you so much again for the review! They help me out with my writing and stuff so muchos gracias! :D Report Review
Haha, Draco on the train, confusing his cronies xD Loved it.Author's Response: i know right! favorite part EVER!!! :D Report Review
I almost cried and became very angry at you, when I read that Hagrid was the target...and then I became confused (and irate, fangirl that I am) when you switched back to his POV and he was having what I assumed to be a slow death...and then the line, "A sudden realization hit me; Draco had killed the flower, not me." XD Squee! Very cute, very funny :)
Ba ha XD --> Draco telling Voldy "that the great man had fallen" XD It's brilliant! I don't know if that was intentional, but I definitely snickered.
For future use, and this is just my opinion here, but with the story being multi-POV (especially since some of the sections for different characters are so short), it would be easier to read if it were in third person. However, it'd be even more confusing if you changed it mid-story (consistency and all that). So, like I said, just for future use. I hope I'm not coming across too naggy :/
Ok! Onto chapter 3!Author's Response: tee hee. yeah i was evil with the hagrid part! ;) but i was thinking to myself as i wrote it, "man... I'm going to flip out a lot of fans :)"
but yeah, that's one of my favorite lines too! "the great man has fallen!" everytime i read it i go, *snigger snigger*
but i see what you mean about the POV. I've always thought about trying that out so for my next story ill give it a go! thanks again for the review!!! Report Review
Woohoo! I really think I'll enjoy this one ^_^ I loved your description of what the potion felt like to Draco, and I loved the little Cruciatus Curse experiment, the test to make sure the potion had worked. I also loved seeing the Malfoys function as an actual loving family--I never view them that way, but snobby people need love, too XD
Not to be a nitpicker, and I'm probably wrong here (I'm only just re-reading the series *finally* after a few years, and I'm only on GoF), but wouldn't "Obliviate" have been effective to wipe Draco's memory? With as powerful as Voldy--er, Voldemort (heh, heh) is, I imagine it'd be strong enough to wipe Draco's memory completely. Eh, just something I noticed! There were a few other mistakes, but not enough to make the story unreadable or anything.
Bravo!! On your first fic ever! XDAuthor's Response: hahahaha thanks!!! You're review was so nice it seriously made my day! but about the whole Deleo memoria spell thingie, the way i saw it was that big bad Vokldie, thinking he's so cool, would think of Obliviate as. oh ummm... easy?? i guess? it's just, since he thinks he's you know, a total boss, he has to make up his own spells. you know??? ok, now i'm just babbling. :)
but thank you sooo much for all of your reviews and ill make sure to post soon! :D Report Review
/dramatically long and drawn out--/ No!! The chapter can't end this way, it just can't! This has been the best chapter so far, by far, and I just--UGGH!! Need more >_<
The fairytale...Draco's little speech to Hermione, where he finally breaks down and begs her to let it mean something...my heart was already pounding from the fear that Bennett/Ron could show up at any moment, but then I read that and it beat even faster...OHMYGOSH SO GOOD.
Update nao plz XD (10/10 again, as if it could be anything else)Author's Response: Wow thanks so much again!! Your compliments made me smile lots! It's reviewers/reviews like you/yours that make me motivated to write out the next chapters! I know, what an emotional moment, and it was kind of scary too 0_o.
What will happen to Ronald?? Will he survive?? Ahhh!!
I will try to work on the next/last chapter soon, I've been busy haha. Between work, a class (albeit online) starting, my boyfriend coming home, I've been busy! But I'll try soon! THANKS A MILLION GALLEONS. Report Review
"Oh how glorious that sounded to finally be so close to someone, to have someone comforting him even if they thought that he was the one comforting them." I loved this line best, probably because I've felt that way numerous times before. I just realized that I love how adult Draco and Hermione are. You've managed to portray their characters very well, while also maturing them past being teenagers--and you've done so smoothly. Huge kudos for that!
Also, I'm glad that nothing happened /ahem/ between Draco and Hermione in this chapter. Too many people rush into that in their stories, but yours feels more natural. More huge kudos. 10/10 for sure!Author's Response: Wowww really? That's such a huge compliment, the whole review you left! Haha, did I really mature them past teenagers? Awesomeness! Maybe that means I'm maturing into adulthood too haha. I guess their romance/relationship throughout this entire story is mainly emotional/bonding type, :)
Thanks so much for reviewing again Emmera, you're so awesome! Please stay tuned for the last chapter soon! Whenever I get a chance to write it haha :) Report Review
Daw!! It feels like it's been forever since I've read...you must update sooner! This is so heartbreakingly sweet :D Report Review
Eek! A fairly uneventful chapter that has me hungering for more, even more than I was before! Hurry, will ya? :P
I loved the bit of PDA between 'Mione and Draco, but loved even more Blaise's wit regarding it XD Thanks for inserting something to make me laugh (and to be honest, the chapter needed it)!!Author's Response: Yeah, unfortunately it had to be uneventful... that's the risk of serializing these things :P these are the bits of the story you would usually skip past! I'm glad you liked those parts anyway :P
Yes, sorry for the doom and gloom! XD thanks for leaving a review! Report Review
Sounds great so far! I got confused on the train, though. I don't understand why Ron went into the prefects compartment; it seemed a little choppy (I expected either more dialogue, or else dialogue explaining that she couldn't stay and talk, like at all); also, I didn't expect McGonagall to be on the train--I assumed she would be at the school waiting for the students, like the other teachers, and that, oh, I don't know, would have included instructions for Malfoy and Hermione in their letters. But, since this is your story, I recommend that you just offer a little more detail/explanation on the matter :)
Your summary has me super duper excited, so despite my criticism I am adding it to my favorites. It seems like you write very well, and I can't wait for more of it XD
P.S. - I like how you've done McGonagall! She's very accurate :DAuthor's Response: Thanks SO much. This is my first story so all your advice means a lot!
Thanks! Just posted second chapter to be validated :) Report Review
Hermione seems OOC. I can't imagine her dropping the "f-bomb". She seems like an angry person in this, and that doesn't seem accurate.
That said, I absolutely love the idea of this story! I can almost feel where you're starting to take it, and I'm excited for it :) Heh, it sounds like Malfoy knows more than Hermione--er, Rose ;)--knows he does, and I can only imagine her reaction to events as they unfold. Please, keep this up!!Author's Response: Hermione will be a bit OCC for a while, but don't worry Draco and Rose will be together in no time
The story sounds very promising, but it doesn't flow very well :/ Try getting a beta or someone that can help you with the grammar. Also, a little more detail would be good. I'm pretty good at following stories and reading the unspoken words when it comes to what the author's trying to say, but it's better when an author paints the picture for me. Like I said, though, it's good so far! I love when a story starts with action and suspense :D Keep it up, and I will keep reading!Author's Response: Hahaha i'm sorry for my awful spelling and grammer my beta is in exams and this story is unfortunatly rush i'm still not sure where it is going but i just wrote what i drempt last night x Report Review
What? No! This can't be the most recent chapter! /frustration/
You should know that means it's really good. Please keep writing; I need more!Author's Response: I just submitted like a nearly 8,000 word chapter today. I know that's too long, but after a writer's road block (that reminds me...I accidentally ran a red stop sign today :/), the words just wouldn't stop!!
I really appreciate that you think it's really good, and that you've read all of the chapters. I think my story is becoming alright, though I'm a bit embarrassed by my first couple of chapters. I've been editing some of the earlier parts of the story, but it gets so boring editing >_<
Thanks so much for the review and reading! I hope you'll catch the next chapter! Report Review
Loved it! The first scene in the library was hilarious. I LOLed at "It was sneer this, sneer that. Draco was the king of the sneers." and couldn't stop laughing until Hermione had left the library. Wow! What an encounter!
I also really loved the part near the end, with Draco being his usual self by bringing up Hermione's stalking of him. I had to read it 3 times before I got it, but when I did, I laughed :D
I do have a question, though: Why would a muggle library house a book on the workings of the Ministry of Magic? That seemed a little out of place to me. Nontheless--10/10! Can't wait to keep reading!Author's Response: LOL Your review made me totally laugh, even though those were my lines you were quoting LOL.
Lol Draco can be a butthead :P
Wow!! How did I not catch that??
I will go change it immediately to a different Ministry! Thank you for catching that, I'll credit you at the end lol.
Thank you so much for this awesome review! Report Review
Hehe: "Mrs. The Boy Who Lived". So cute!
Also, I'm intensely curious as to why Hermione and Ron broke up--it seems like she left him, but that's all I can tell. How very sad--they both obviously have feelings for each other, but for reasons beyond my understanding, it's over. Can't wait to read more!
This was very well written, and good :) On to the next chapter!Author's Response: Aww, your review made me smile, thanks! I actually just barely submitted the latest chapter into the queue, where finally the reasons for their split are revealed. Thank you soo much for your nice review! Report Review
I just read all 19 chapters in one sitting. Amazing, I've loved it so far. I love how things are progressing slowly between Hermione and Draco (I'm still anxiously awaiting the moment he calls her by her name, or tells her he loves her, and other such sappy things). I love that Hermione's shy and uncertain around Draco, it's super cute. I love that the Malfoys are actually portrayed as humans with emotions, despite their just plain rottenness over blood purity and dark magic and such snobbery. And I super loved the scene in Malfoy Manor; you did an amazing job of sending absolute terror through every bone in my body (believe me, that's quite an accomplishment).
So, I'd say, overall, PLEASE hurry with the next chapters!
Your new fan,
EmAuthor's Response: I'm glad that you are enjoying it! Everything that you've written down is something I've spent time thinking about, so I'm glad that you liked those parts specifically :) in these closing chapters I'm going to try to keep things as intense and exciting as possible, so I hope you enjoy them :D
Thanks for the review! :D Report Review
Too short :P I want more :D
I loved so much that she called him Draco. I loved so much their secret interaction in this chapter. So believable. So much turmoil in his heart. I want to be Hermione so I can go give the lad a hug. And a good snogging, too.Author's Response: thanks again for all your reviews! Report Review
I totally enjoyed shirtless Draco :D I'd enjoy it even better if I had Hermione's eyes. Maybe if I could *be* Hermione :D Hehe.
So, as badly as my head hurts from too much computer time today, I'm still reading. You've sucked me in; I love it. This is the best HG/DM I've read in years. However, a little critique about this chapter in particular--it would make much more sense to me if Draco and Hermione referred to present-day Malfoy as "you" (from Hermione's perspective) and "I" or "me" (from Draco's perspective). The "he" business makes it clear that they're talking about present-day Malfoy, but it's also less consistent because he's not actually a different person. Changed, yes; different, no. Just a little advice that I hope was helpful :)Author's Response: thanks for reading! i'll keep that in mind for future chapters. it's been quite difficult writing and referring to the two different draco's. glad you're enjoying it though! Report Review
I has goosebumps :D His strong arms around her when she fell, this is getting good :) It's so good I can't even be obnoxiously excited about it :P Report Review
Squee! I can't help reviewing! I love it, I love it, I love it XD Report Review
Ahhh! Suspense.is.killing me!! Good thing the chapters are short, though XD Actually, I really love that they're short, each one leaves me excited for the next one. The story's going super smoothly, and the pace is just right--fast, but not too fast. I'm loving it. Back to reading! :D Report Review
So far, so good! I really love this ship, but not very many people can do it believably. I know it's only the first chapter, and there wasn't any mention of Draco (to my knowledge; he could have been the mysterious man at the end of the chapter!), but it still seems smooth, and the characters seem pretty accurate. I'll definitely keep reading, and let you know what I think a few chapters ahead! :D Report Review
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