Reading Reviews From Member: AlexFan
  
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Review #26, by AlexFanThe Unsinkable Molly Prewett: Canít Take My Eyes Off of You

26th January 2015:
My favourite thing about this fic has to be the relationships that Molly and Arthur have with their siblings, no wonder Ron and his brothers and Ginny grew up to be such a tight knit group. Gideon and Fabian are absolute copies of Fred and George and I can just imagine Molly's reaction when her own twin sons picked up the tendencies of her two brothers, "It's like living with Fabian and Gideon again."

I love how Bilius doesn't even tease Arthur for very long about having a girlfriend, he's just there enjoying the events that take place, it's great. Molly's dad is so chill, I thought he would've been a lot more serious but instead he just directs Arthur to Molly's window and goes back to sleep, how many dads out there can claim that?

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Review #27, by AlexFanChai, Chutney, and a Friend in the Wee Hours of the Morning: Chai, Chutney, and a Surprise

26th January 2015:
I can relate to Hannah so much, I absolutely hate chopping onions, I always tear up so bad that it gets to the point where I canít even see anymore because thereís so much crying and I have to put down the knife and walk away. My eyes burning just thinking about it,

I understand Nevilleís struggle with the pressure cooker, my momís old one used to drive me crazy because it would start whistling at the most random of times and it would always startle me. And then whenever I tried to take the lid off, or attempt to, I couldnít figure out how I was supposed to turn it, I donít like pressure cookers is basically the story here.

The minute that Neville said that they should get married because of a chutney recipe I just wanted to groan because thatís not how you ask someone to marry you and I thought Hannah was just going to eat him alive for proposing that way. But at the same time, I wouldnít have expected anything more from Neville to be honest, it was just so completely Neville that it made laugh. It seemed like the perfect way for him to ask Hannah to marry him.

Oh my God Neville, way to tell the love of your life the story behind her engagement ring, ďNot because she killed him,Ē oh my God, where did this boy come from. Heís so sweet, and awkward, and dorky. I would like my own Neville, can I have my own Neville. I think your Neville is perfect, I wouldnít change anything about him at all, you can still see the eleven-year-old in him but at the same time heís a lot more confident and a lot happier than his kid-self and I love how youíve wrapped that all into one person so great.

(Also, Iím sorry this took so long I got sidetracked kpop.)

Author's Response: There are people who enjoy chopping onions? I either get my mother to do it, or take out a machine. Technology was invented so that I wouldn't have to chop onions! I'm just a puddle of painful tears when I chop them.

I remember when I first learnt how to open and close a pressure cooker. I feel you Neville - the struggle is real. They're so useful but they're just so difficult to use!

I just loved writing that scene. He's just so NEVILLE about it all. He wants to be this really cool and suave guy, but marriage is just such a huge thing, and he kind of just muddles right through it. I do love how he just keeps going, despite how terrible it's all going. But the great thing about these two is that Hannah gets him. A big part of it I think is that she's in shock - how can someone ask such a question by using a chutney recipe as a segue?

So much of Neville's awkwardness is my awkwardness to be honest. I feel like this is the kind of story I'd tell. I can babble terribly when I'm nervous. I'm just so happy by how many people love Neville. People have really embraced the dorkiness!

Thanks for the lovely review. (And totally understandable - kpop is a black hole)


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Review #28, by AlexFanBeing a Falmouth Falcon: Clubs and One Night Stands

25th January 2015:
I was kind of hoping that Gigi would've been the bigger person and told Camilla that Adam and James always get like that when they're drunk. I am always one hundred percent here for girls sticking up for girls and I feel like Camilla is a little lost or maybe she just wants to be noticed and she thinks having everything that Gigi has is going to change that. I mean don't get me wrong, she shouldn't have said that about Jenny, Camilla has no right to judge someone on what life choices they've made.

But yeah, Gigi, is going to have to burn all of her furniture and get her flat cleansed with some holy water. And I'm so proud of her for being so secure in her relationship with James, because she's not jealous, she's more annoyed but she knows James and she knows how loyal he is and I like that they trust each other so much, that's a good relationship right there.

Author's Response: Gigi the bigger person? You're funny. Camila is... a treat. She's definitely got something wrong with her. I couldn't tell you what, but there's something wrong with that girl.

Gigi and James's relationship is based off of a lot of...interesting things. Well, you've seen it! You've read the first story ;).

xoxo


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Review #29, by AlexFanPsychos and Psychologists : Problem Number Eleven

24th January 2015:
It's so good to see this story back! I was wondering what had happened to it!

Finally, there's some progress being made though! Coral is actually going to be able to provide some form of help now that Albus has decided to actually open up to her. And I'm actually kind of glad that she yelled at him to be honest, it seemed like Albus was just looking for a reason to stay angry and using that whole, "you don't know anything about me thing," as a way of keeping people out and snapping at them. Maybe people would know what they were talking about if he actually opened up about his problems.

In regards to your writing, you're definitely not a bad writer, I think the main thing you need to work on is your description because you kind of leave out the details about the things going on around your characters which results in what appears to be too much dialogue and very little setting.

(Also, Kenny is my favourite.)

Author's Response: ahh i am terribly sorry! it has been a while since i've updated :(

i am really glad she yelled at him too. there is only so much of complaining and moodiness anybody can take. and also he was really starting to annoy her so.

thank you so much for the critique! i'll definitely try to keep that in mind and try to improve!

thank you so much for your kind words grace :)


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Review #30, by AlexFanThe Worst: Settling

23rd January 2015:
Okay first off, that ending, wow, now I want to know what David Dale could possibly have to offer Dom, although I get the feeling that it might not be good or maybe he's going to offer Dom a position in a werewolf pack or something like that.

Pace: I thought the pace was good, everything went at a really good speed, there was enough information put in to move the story enough but not so much that it started dragging. I liked that feeling of Dom having to get straight back to work as soon as her transformation was over kind of showing how the world didn't stop for her just because she had bigger problems than most people.

Characterization: I thought your Dom was spot on personally. I could picture her pushing the talk with Teddy as far away as possible and keeping herself busy with other things to take her mind off of what she needs to do. I thought everyone else was pretty spot on as well.

So, you know, awesome chapter (as usual).

Author's Response: Thank you once again for your review. I'll try to update much sooner this time as there're only 2 chapters (or possibly one if I decide to combine them) left for this story now. As for David Dale, we'll see.

It's a relief that the pace was good. I was afraid it was dragging a little. Yes, it is definitely like Dom to throw herself into work - and the world definitely doesn't stop for her.

I am so relieved that you find Dom's personality consistent so far. Thank you for your awesome review!


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Review #31, by AlexFanChai, Carrots, and a Friend in the Wee Hours of the Morning: Chai, Carrots, and a Surprise

21st January 2015:
I AM SO HAPPY YOU CAME BACK FOR THE NEXT ONE-SHOT!

The cutest thing is watching Neville worry about gaining a few pounds, thatís just so cute and it made me laugh because I can just picture Neville thinking about something like that. Even now that Neville is a big Auror, heís still envious of how other people are more courageous than he is when heís an Auror for Godís sake. But I guess it takes a different type of bravery to do what Hannah did.

Itís so cute how excited Neville is to have Hannah to visit. The way that he hugs her and thinks about her, Hannah has already become home for Neville. He really does have it bad. I canít stop smiling.

Dazzle you with my mad culinary skills.

I am laughing and smiling so much, this is so cute I donít know what to do with myself. This is the best Hannah/Neville that Iíve ever read in my entire life. I would recommend this to anyone. Neville, your Herbology nerdiness is showing.

If my culinary teacher heard Neville summoning a peeler like that, heíd probably go into some kind of frenzy and start yelling about the dangers of doing something like that and how it couldíve cut Neville.

Neville is such a dork oh my goodness. Him and his amazing fire fighting skills. I love how heís just prepared in case a fire does start to get the hell out of his flat and just run for it before he dies. And how he has to remind himself that heís not going to literally impress the pants off of Hannah. I love Neville, Neville is just perfect. Neville is going to woo Hannah with his impressive pruning skills.

Neville knows the qualifications for being a teacher. I donít hate children. Children donít hate me. I would love to attend a class taught your Neville to be perfectly honest. But just think about how far Neville has come, he used to be this little kid who couldnít even stand up to his friends and now heís willing to stand in front of a class and teach.

The ending was perfect this entire thing was perfect, Iím one second away from shrieking at a pitch that only dogs will be able to hear. Not even joking Iím about to cry from how cute and wonderful this is. You write romance so well I donít know how you do it but youíve been blessed by the gods of romance or something because this was brilliant.

Author's Response: Ah! I'm so happy you're back as well!

I feel as if I've written Neville with all my anxieties and concerns. He can get carried away in his thoughts sometimes. But I'm pleased that it works!

I think the biggest thing we can take away from this is that Neville is a cutie. He's so genuinely enthusiastic about Hannah and their relationship, and that's so infectious. I'm always in such a great mood after I've written Neville.

Gah! *faints* THANKS SO MUCH. LET ME HUG YOU TO DEATH. I'm so pleased by how much people are enjoying this series. I wanted people to feel happy after reading them, and it makes me so happy that I'm succeeding!

That is the dumbest thing to do! Peelers can be dangerous! My poor thumb understands...

I think Neville doesn't realise that his appeal lies in his dorkiness. He wouldn't be Neville without it. I just want to hug him so hard sometimes.

Seriously, that's all you really need. And you know, a few skills in communication. I want to go to one of his classes, too! I feel like he'd be a really great educator! And I know, right? He's just grown so much! Argh! My love for Neville is endless!

Thank you so much! You're always so nice, Grace! I'm so happy that you enjoyed it :D ♥


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Review #32, by AlexFanMagical Beasts: A Documentary: Merpeople

19th January 2015:
I think youíre off to a really good start here, itís really interesting and your main character is likeable.

I thought the pace of the story was okay personally, considering that Bryn got arrested by merpeople and they threatened to kill her, Iíd say the pace was just right for the story. The only thing that I would suggest is maybe being more detailed with your description of what was actually under the lake. I know that Bryn couldnít see far but she had to pass by something and who knows what could be living under a lake with merpeople in it. You could have her react to something touching her leg or something slimy swimming past her without her noticing to maybe slow it down even more.

But other than that, I think itís great!

Author's Response: Oh thank you! I agree with you, I'll have to go back and add some imagery. I spent a lot of time researching merpeople for this chapter and I think I need to go back and do them more justice too now that I've reread it.

Thank you for your time!!!


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Review #33, by AlexFanChai, Zebras, and a Friend in the Wee Hours of the Morning: Chai, Zebras, and a Surprise

19th January 2015:
OH MY GOSH I AM SO EXCITED TO READ THIS I LOVED YOUR FIRST ONE-SHOT SO MUCH!

Neville is so cute! Even when heís sad he manages to give Hannah a compliment and sheís so cute as well. She pretends like all of the sweet stuff that Neville does is just something thatís friendly. If only she would open her eyes to the truth.

I absolutely love it when you add in little bits of Hannahís family culture into the story even if itís for something as simple as chai. I donít know why, itís just for me it makes her character come alive even more and I feel like I know Hannah better.

For me personally, itís very obvious that Neville has a crush on Hannah by the way that he looks at her and the way that he talks to her and treats her. And most importantly, by the way that sheís the person that he goes to when something like Atticus dying happens because he trusts her and he likes her. You donít go crying to just anyone when someone close to you dies so that says a lot about how much Hannah means to him.

I definitely think that this could stand on its own as a one-shot, but thereís a certain level of familiarity between the characters and in the writing that kind of hint that you donít have to, but you should read the one-shot coming before this one. But yes, it can stand on its own.

Oh, and lastly, I was so excited to see that there was another one-shot coming after this one, I actually squealed. If you were to make this into a novel or something, Iím just saying that I would definitely read it.

Author's Response: AH! THANK YOU SO MUCH!

Neville is really adorable. And she's adorable. I spent most of this fic battling myself to not make them adorable together already. But the timing wasn't right, I think.

I was really surprised to learn that a lot of people don't know how to brew tea using loose leaf, so I thought I'd include how to do that here as my "recipe". I feel like this series is part love story and part cooking show :P

Ah, that's good! I thought I was being obvious, but I didn't want to be too obvious because then it's a case of why hasn't Hannah picked up on this already? I've written her to be perceptive, so that was the biggest struggle here. But yes! He comes to her because she's the bomb diggity to him!

Thanks for the feedback on that! I'm glad that it reads as a standalone though. Sometimes you're just not in the mood for the prequel and wanna jump right in, so I was trying to cater for that kind of mood a little bit.

Yes! I just posted it! If there's space in your queue I'll mosey on over to request a review! They're always so lovely and just make my day! I don't see this becoming a novel, but there might just be room for one more one-shot for these two...

Thanks so much for the wonderful review :)


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Review #34, by AlexFanAnd Just Like That: Chapter 2

18th January 2015:
Oh my God Snape is so creepy following Lily around like that!, he doesn't even have the courage to talk to her, he just follows her around. I'm pretty sure if that had been an unknown girl she would've run home with her keys in between her fingers. And even after everything that Lily has said, he still doesn't get it, she wants to get the job in the kitchen because she's earned it not because someone asked for her to have it, there's a difference.

I loved that part where she talks about giving Severus so many second chances that at some point it just becomes wishful thinking. Because it's totally true, a lot of people think that Lily should've given Severus another chance but the fact is that she probably had given him multiple chances to change but he just messed it up every time.

And I liked how Lily was slowly coming to terms with the fact that James had his not so great qualities as well as good qualities. A lot of the time when people hate James they completely forget about all of the good characteristics of his and just focus on the bad but I liked how Lily acknowledged both of them and is slowly coming around to the idea that despite his bad qualities, James can be incredibly kind and caring and he makes an effort to change and be a good person.

I really really really really love this story.

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Review #35, by AlexFanL'optimisme: WŁrttemberg

14th January 2015:
Personally, Gellert doesnít seem out of character to me, he sounds the same as he did in the previous chapters that were told in his point of view so I donít think you have anything to worry about there. He still has that tone of voice where it seems like heís making little jabs at Albus to try and get a reaction out of him with stuff like ďIíll probably go insane here and then youíll have that on your conscience.Ē (I canít believe Iím only noticing this now). I also like how you added yet another layer to Gellertís character by showing that this is a man that lives on being the center of attention.

Honestly, I like Gellert more than I like Albus. Gellert is more direct and sharp, he doesnít beat around the bush and heíll tell you whatís on his mind whether you want to hear or not, no matter who you are. I like that heís unapologetic about what he says and believes. I like how Gellert isnít modest, he knows exactly what he is capable of and how intelligent he is, just like Albus does, but unlike Albus, Gellert doesnít try to make what he can do any less than what it is. He wonít go around bragging about it but he wonít deny that heís brilliant and itís just really appealing how confident he is. Gellert is just my favourite character.

I thought there was definitely plot in the chapter, maybe it was a little slow in the beginning but you had to give some background so that the reader could understand what was going on and then it picked up and went at a steady pace that kept the chapter interesting. I personally thought it flowed really well, everything connected together really well and just in general, I would say this was really well written.

Author's Response: Hi there - thank you so much for stopping by again! :)

Thank you so much! I was so worried about that because this chapter felt very different to previous ones when I was writing it. Yeah, he's very bitterly scathing towards Albus in a way, even though Albus can't actually hear him or read it or anything, it's more a matter of principle. :P Yeah, I always thought of him as a sort of egocentric person - he thrives on attention, so being deprived of it isn't really good for him, in terms of himself.

Haha, really? Well, you're definitely the first :P (Apart from maybe Albus himself, lol) But yeah, Gellert is a lot less inclined to be sympathetic and cover things up if they're harsh than Albus is, though he's not any less likely to cover things for his own agenda. I really wanted him to be apologetic, too, so I'm so glad you like that, because to me it's a very important part of his character, and it distinguishes him from Voldemort, which I really wanted to do. Modesty is not a thing Gellert is really familiar with, or tries to be familiar with. It's a good thing and a bad thing, I think; it's not always something people appreciate, particularly given that he's not inclined to overestimating other people, either. I'm just so happy you like him, though, because I really wanted to make him more than just evil, you know? :)

I really tried to get the plot moving along a bit for Gellert in this one, especially given that now he has the Elder Wand... he needs the revolution! :P Yeah, I tried to cut down the background stuff, but I wasn't sure it would really make sense shorter, hence the length. I'm so glad you didn't think it dragged too much, though - I'm always so nervous about that! :)

Thank you so much for the lovely - it was so great to get, as always! :)

Aph xx


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Review #36, by AlexFanThe Rose Petal Beach: The Rose Petal Beach

14th January 2015:
Oh God, the minute that I saw stalker mentioned I was already getting the creeps for the story. Iíve just started reading and I already feel like Iím being watched. Okay, at the moment, I think that Scorpius is the boyfriend. Iím saying Scorpius is the boyfriend because Sean is a lot more aggressive than Scorpius is and he seems to insist that he and Rose are back together. I would expect him to be the stalker out of the two boys. That being said, Sean could also be the boyfriend because Rose is too afraid to tell him that she and Sean are over because of what heíll do.

Either way, this is actually terrifying me, I just want to take Rose and hide her in like a cave just so that sheíll be safe from her stalker. I thought it wouldíve been easy to figure out who was the stalker but itís really not considering that Sean and Scorpius have pretty much copied each other in just about everything, even their names start with the same letter!

I can tell you one thing, youíre doing a very good job of confusing the living daylights out of me. I thought I had this figured out but everything keeps changing and details are beginning to throw me off Iím questioning everything now.

I thought for sure Scorpius was the boyfriend but now Iím no longer sure, Iím beginning to think that he was the stalker, I mean what else could Rose mean by, ďSee what youíre doing to me, Scorpius?Ē And why would she be unhappy to see him if he was her boyfriend, and most importantly, why would he have followed her to the hospital if he was her boyfriend! EVERYTHING THAT I KNOW HAS BEEN TURNED UPSIDE DOWN WHAT IS RIGHT ANYMORE?!

Scorpius is the stalker, right? Iím not wrong, am I? Iím not just imagining all of this stuff, Scorpius is the stalker and Sean was the boyfriend, right (although he seems kind of violent to be perfectly honest with you). What if both Sean and Scorpius were the stalker (now Iím just grasping at straws here).

The suspense is killing me. I'm going to be stuck awake at night trying to figure this out now.

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Review #37, by AlexFanInfatuation: Chapter 7: RIA

13th January 2015:
Ivy makes me so mad! She can't just go around playing with people's feelings like this just because she doesn't get her way. Oo she just makes me so mad! Someone needs to teach this girl a lesson that she can't go around bullying people just to get what she wants.

Poor Willow is getting her heart broken and all she wanted was to make sure that Ivy didn't hurt her or Prav and look at what happens instead. And Prav is being such a jerk! Just because his ego is a little bit hurt now he's acting like a jerk just to hurt Ivy and make himself feel better. Rejection sucks I get that but he's acting like a spoiler child, he needs to smarten up and get with the program!

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Review #38, by AlexFanVictoire: The Guard

13th January 2015:
Talk about petty school rivalries huh? I can see Ron being petty towards Cormac and keeping him at Azkaban for as long as he could, Ron can be a little childish, but I somehow have a harder time picturing Harry letting this happen. Yeah, younger Harry probably wouldnít have minded just letting Cormac freeze his fingers off in Azkaban, but older Harry probably wouldnít have. I think he wouldíve at least tried to get Ron to give Cormac a break. Speaking of Cormac, has the poor man never heard of gloves or mittens? Or maybe casting a Heating Charm on himself?

I have respect for the boy though, it mustíve taken a lot of self-restraint to ignore the tauntings of the prisoners insulting Romilda and more. Not everyone wouldíve been able to just brush it off and keep walking but Iím a little proud of Cormac for doing just that, it looks like heís actually matured since his school days.

I really liked the sinister feel to the story that you gave when Greyback died laughing because you just knew that something bad had happened. And I especially loved how you ended the chapter with Izzy Montgomery screaming, it definitely left me wanting more (and Iím definitely adding this to my favouriteís list as we speak). The story is off to a really interesting start, Iím really excited to see whatís going on and how Greyback ties into it. I think the story flowed really well from Cormacís point of view to Victoireís at Hogwarts, it provided two different perspectives on the same subject.

I really love your characterization of Victoire and Teddy, Victoire is cool and collected just like her mum, but sheís also caring and you can clearly tell that she really cares about her friends and the problems that they face. So all in all, I think this is a brilliant start to your story!

Author's Response: I know it seems a little harsh of Ron and Harry. It's supposed to be slightly unreliable narration from Cormac but maybe that didn't come through? So there are probably other reasons he's ended up back there again but he's talked himself into thinking they're bullying him. And haha I'll have a think about giving him gloves...

I'm so glad you enjoyed reading and thank you so so much for the favourite! The next chapter should be up today or tomorrow.

Emma xx


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Review #39, by AlexFanWhen Summer Fades: solstice

13th January 2015:
I get the sense that Regulus is a little bit disgusted with himself and how easily it was for him to go back to being the person that he was before and shutting off his feelings. He mustíve felt that around Summer he had changed into a new person, and Regulus did change, but he almost seems to think that without Summer there, heís still the same old prejudiced person that he was before who chose to feel nothing. I canít imagine how lonely it mustíve been for Regulus at this point in his life to have no one to turn to, although Iím sure Sirius wouldíve forgiven had he found out what his little brother was going through.

You can definitely see why Kreacher liked Regulus the most out of everyone, Regulus gave Kreacher the care and attention that no one else in Regulusís family gave. And as tough as Kreacher may try to be, and as much as he may insist that it is his job to serve the Blacks, he still wants someone to treat him like an actual being instead of dirt. Can you imagine how much Regulusís kindness mustíve impacted him?

The more I keep thinking about Regulus the sadder Iím getting because I can just picture the amount of self-loathing that he went through thinking that he was not enough and then having the Dark Lord tell him that he was weak. And itís funny that the Dark Lord should describe Regulus as being weak like a girl considering his right hand lieutenant is Bellatrix Lestrange, a girl.

It almost seems as if Regulus has completely gotten over Summer and her family dying but then you bring it back when I least expect it and I realise that Regulus hasnít forgotten at all but the only way for him to deal with the pain and loss that he witnessed is by shutting all of his emotions down and bottling it up instead of letting it out because heís never known how to do anything else in his life. This was so sad but so well written and I really enjoyed this short story!

Author's Response: You're definitely right, Regulus isn't in a good place, and I like what you pointed out about him worrying if he's become the same prejudiced, unchanged person he was before. I could absolutely see that as being a factor in why he's so upset. Ahh and yeah Sirius would probably have forgiven him if they weren't too stubborn to talk to each other. Writing this story made me so frustrated with both of them because it all COULD have turned out so much better!

Given how attached Kreacher was to 'Master Regulus' in the books, it seemed like Regulus had to have been kind to him otherwise why would Kreacher be so loyal. Yeah, Kreacher may not have been the nicest later on, but he did have feelings.

I love that you pointed that out about Voldemort's insult that Regulus is like 'a weak little girl', because of course Bellatrix is certainly not weak. But I wouldn't put it past Voldemort to make a sexist comment even when his strongest supporter is a female. Boo, Voldemort.

You've definitely got Regulus summed up pretty well in that last paragraph, and I'm so glad that you understood him that well, means I did that effectively so that's really great to hear.

Thank you, it really means a lot to hear that you liked this story and thought it was well written. Thanks so much for your review!! ♥


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Review #40, by AlexFanKissing in Private: Part One

29th December 2014:
Sorry for taking so long with my review but itís finally here!

I really like your Teddy so far, because I can totally relate to him and his social awkwardness. I totally understand his nervousness over talking to new people and making friends. That pounding in your heart, and your stomach churning and that feeling of dread that just takes over your body. Itís horrible. Although to be fair, my anxiety doesnít lead to the level of disaster that Teddyís does. And I can definitely see why he doesnít seem to be so confident, by the sound of it, he doesnít fit societyís idea of masculine and it really bothers him no matter how hard he tries to brush it off. You can just tell that he doesnít like that when people look at him, they donít think ďstrong man,Ē or something like that.

One thing that really stood out to me, and confused me was this bit, ďto see a group of textbook, able-bodied other seventh-yearsĒ and I just thought that I would point it out because Iím not entirely sure what it was supposed to say and I thought you might want to fix it.

Iíd never really pictured Teddy as getting picked on because of his abilities to be honest. I always thought of him as that cool kid that could contort his face to whatever he wanted, but itís interesting to see him in a new light. I can definitely understand how his lack of control over being a Metamorphmagus would land him on the end of jokes.

You told me that you were writing in first person, and Iím going to guess that itís in present tense first person judging by the writing, which if it is, I just wanted to point out that throughout the story you slip up and revert back to past tense. Itís little stuff like ďgrinnedĒ instead of ďgrinsĒ or ďhadĒ instead of ďhas.Ē

Another thing that I thought you could improve on is maybe the description. I got the basic gist of what was happening but it just didnít feel like it was pulling me into the story.You donít need much but just something to give an idea of the surroundings so that the reader can begin to form a picture in their head of what theyíre supposed to be seeing. But other than that, I think youíve got an interesting start here!

Author's Response: Hello! Thank you so much for your review!

It means a lot to me that you said you can relate to Teddy. I was very conscious of writing a character who seemed real, so if you can relate to him that seems like the jackpot! Thank you! I wanted to take a chance and write a different kind of Teddy than people are normally used to seeing--that cocky, badboy kind of character. I'm glad you are seeing that it's working! I am really glad that you are picking up on the fact that he is upset about not being that sort of strong man type that he's expected to be.

Thank you! When I tried looking into Teddy's character, it said that many Metamorphmagi understand their abilities through trial and error, so I wanted to show why Teddy never tried--he had such a traumatic experience as a child that it hindered him from developing. I'm glad you like it!

I typically don't write many descriptions because I tend to focus on the action of the story to keep it going. The only descriptions I tend to write are those that are relevant and important to the plot and action of the story. So that's why they are scarce. I can definitely understand how adding more would give it more depth--I will consider it. But I also hope that you can understand my perspective as a writer and open your mind to a different type of writing that's maybe more streamlined!

Thank you so much for your review!


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Review #41, by AlexFanWhen Summer Fades: syzygy

29th December 2014:
First off, sorry for taking so long with this review but it has arrived finally!

You said that you were worried about lack of description, and for me, itís personally not an issue. I like the little details that you include throughout the story of Siriusís life and what his family is like around him, I think thereís enough to get to know Regulus even more than before and to really get an idea of what his home life is like, but not enough so that I end up getting bored and just start skimming. In terms of setting description, you could add in more description if you really wanted to give a vivid picture of Hogwarts but I personally donít feel this part to be all that important since the characters drive the story forward.

I loved the interaction between Regulus and Summerís parents. This entire experience for Regulus is just showing that everything heís been told about muggles was false and that theyíre ordinary people just like him, except they canít do magic. It sounds like heís honestly surprised to find how utterly normal Summerís parents are, almost as if he expected them to be these savage creatures.

I seriously just wish that Regulus would get fed up with his friends, knock them in the face and then stalk out of the Slytherin common room to get a cookie or something for his good work. My God, his friends are worse than his family when it comes to sticking their nose into Regulusís business.

I really loved that last line at the end of the chapter, itís my favourite one, because not only is Regulus talking about the seasons, but itís foreshadowing and I just really really love it because of how well it fits into the story and Iím just sitting here like, ďhe he, clever.Ē

Author's Response: I understand as this is a busy time of year so no worries!

That's great to hear that the description was sufficient and that you liked the details, and that you felt it helped you get to know Regulus better in this chapter. In this story I did try to focus on little specifics rather than broader description so that's good to hear.

Aw, thank you! It probably was a surprise for him to find out how normal they are after everything else he's been taught growing up. I'm thrilled you liked that as it was a pretty important moment for him.

Gah, right? They are one of the only reasons holding him back at this point from freeing himself - but although they are nosy and closed-minded, I was hoping to show that they do really care about Regulus, in their way.

Thanks so much about that last line, I really liked that one as well and it's so lovely to hear that it's well received. I'm glad you appreciated the multiple meanings in it as well ;)

Thanks so much for your review, Grace!


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Review #42, by AlexFanYear Five: Cleaner, More Brilliant

17th December 2014:
Oh my goodness! This is the final chapter! I canít believe it! Itís been such a long ride!

I loved the reference to Doctor Who that you made! And if you were to look at it from a magical perspective, the show would be absolutely boring to witches and wizards because this is the kind of stuff that they can do and theyíd probably wonder why people are so fascinated with it. ďHis police box is bigger on the inside? My cousin did that once, it wasnít that big of a deal.Ē

Oh God, 90ís-early 2000 fashion was just an adventure, I look back at some of the clothing and I just cringe because of how horrible it looks, I canít believe that was considered fashionable once upon the time.

Iím so happy that Isobel is slowly becoming a confident woman again and learning to love herself for who she really is. Thatís really great to see and Iím so incredibly happy for her! She deserves to be happy, and I hope her family never puts her down about her appearance ever again (or else!) Iím just in general so glad that everyone is recovering and becoming better people and leading healthier lives (you know, underage drinking and smoking aside).

I canít believe that the story is finally over! I know I joined the crowds a little late on everything but Iím so glad that you requested from me and that I got to read this awesome story. Youíre a truly talented writer and youíre more than welcome to come and request from me again if you want (and to let me know if you start another novel!)

Author's Response: Oh my gosh! Thank you so much for being an AMAZING reviewer, and reviewing this WHOLE THING! It means the world to me!

Ahahaha--yes, making things 'bigger on the inside' is pretty par for the course in the magical world :p

I'm still super bummed that the movies were set in modern day! Part of the fun of this story was being SUPER aware of the era (including the ridiculous fashions!)

I definitely think that the Doge-Mostafa's learned their lesson. They aren't truly bad people, just sort of inconsiderate--now that they've seen their daughter nearly starve herself to death, they just want to see her healthy and happy. They for sure learned their lesson about body-shaming!

And yeah, all the kids aren't gonna just up and be super Reformed and all--they'll still party a bit. But moderation is key!

Thank you so much for all of your kind words and encouragement! You are the best!

XOXOXO
Roisin


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Review #43, by AlexFanWhen Summer Fades: equinox

17th December 2014:
I can definitely see the problem that Regulus was having, and I can definitely relate to him as well. He wants to please everyone, all of his family has placed such high expectations on him and heís conflicted about what he wants to do because he wants to make everyone happy, but no matter what Regulus does, someone is going to end up unhappy with him. I mean, obviously he should do whatever makes him happy, but thatís a lot easier said than done, especially when youíre in his situation.

I find it kind of funny actually how completely grumpy Regulus is about everything. I mean, he hates it when people are too happy (and is it weird that I know what he means by that). He claims to be so annoyed by this girl yet he notices her whenever she greets other people. That one encounter with her and itís already beginning to have an effect on him.

Summer seems like such a nice person, sheís one of those people that makes friends really easily and is well-liked by everyone, yet you have no idea how she manages to do it so easily.

ďI never claimed I was a saint.Ē That line for some reason just really stood out to me. I think it was because it just really reminded me that Regulus is trying so hard to convince himself of the things that his parents have instilled in him and to behave like a proper pureblood, but itís just making him unhappy and itís obvious because heís so inclined to hang out with Summer. Someone that was devoted to Voldemort would never do that.

I honestly really love your Regulus. I loved hearing him talk about his favourite things about winter, it just really showed how young he was no matter how tough and mature he tried to act about everything. I mean, he needs to ease up on the Mudblood there but in general he seems like a kid who doesnít know what heís gotten himself into (which is pretty much what happened in canon).

And I love Summer because sheís such a genuinely nice and caring person. Sheís always there for her friends and she was even willing to listen and become friends with this boy that made it more than obvious that he didnít want to be around her, not a lot of people would do that. She is the very opposite of Regulus, and somehow, the two of them work.

I just really love this and Iím beginning to wonder why I havenít read this before now.

Author's Response: Grace, thank you for such a lovely review! Gaa!

I'm really glad that Regulus is relatable in his situation there. He is really put in a tough place between the two sides of his family and his friends and his house and it's good to hear that his indecision seems to fit.

Haha, yeah I don't like it when people are overly happy either, I'm glad you can relate too :p I think Summer's outlook on life is just so alien to him that he can't help but notice. She does have a huge effect on him even when he doesn't notice.

Ah, I'm so glad you liked that line, and I really like your interpretation of it. He is definitely unhappy where he is, and doesn't know where he belongs, and it's possible he's just convincing himself that even though he's hanging out with Summer that he still doesn't like her. You made some great points there!

Thank you, I am so glad you like my portrayal of Regulus, and especially the kind of innocent side of him that likes Christmas and snow. You're right - he's really just a kid who's had to grow up too fast.

So glad you like Summer as well! Regulus needed some sort of opposite influence than he had from the rest of his life and it's really wonderful to hear that you like her and that despite all the reasons she shouldn't, she works as a good friend for Reg.

Thank you so much for your kind review! I really appreciate it ♥


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Review #44, by AlexFanYear Five: After

12th December 2014:
Iím going to apologize in advance if I start making no sense throughout this review as I am sick and who knows what might happen.

Okay, first off, thank God that Tristan is alive, I honestly thought that he wasnít going to make it and like I had to prepare myself to deal with his death. I remember how in Philosopherís Stone Harry noticed someone else in the hospital wing with him who was curtained off and I like how you connected Tristan to that time in canon (seriously, I love how you connect every small canon thing to your story).

On another note, can you just imagine the rumours at Hogwarts about Harry after he killed Quirrel. Like, an eleven-year-old murdered a teacher with his bare hands, imagine how that mustíve terrified some people.

I never thought that I would read a sentence like, ďI snogged Voldemort is what happened.Ē Yet here we are.

OH MY GOD WHAT?! HE IS BELLATRIX AND RABASTANíS SON LIKE WHAT THE HELL I DID NOT SEE THIS COMING. I mean, I knew that his biological parents had been Death Eaters but I never thought to make the connection, at least we know why Narcissa was so willing to take Tristan in, and now the story that his father told him makes sense. Thatís just, wow, thatís a really big thing. Talk about a plot twist. Can you imagine how different Tristan wouldíve turned out had he lived with Narcissa and Lucius.

I feel like everyone is beginning to start over and get to know each other better now. Despite everything that has happened, I think all of the characters are in a much better and healthier place than they were at the beginning of the story. And I love how you added even more depth to Isobel by making her question her sexuality. Itís something that a lot of people begin to question and explore as they grow older and become more educated. I love how she came to acknowledge that she didnít like men the way that she liked women and how perfectly okay she was with that.

Oh my gosh Iím so happy for Tristan and the fact that he finally got some closure! He was really brave to go and see his father in Azkaban. And I can definitely see what he was worrying about, wondering if you would grow up to be as cruel as your Death Eater father had been. A huge weight has been lifted off of his shoulders now that he sees that he is nothing like his father. Iím so glad that Tristan finally sees and appreciates the parents that he has that replaced Rabastan and Bellatrix.

Author's Response: Yes! I'm sure there's another explanation for who was in the curtained off bed--but it just worked so well!

And yeah, we hear Dumbledore say that the rumors are running wild, but we never really got to SEE the rest of the school's perspective. So that was definitely fun to play with.

Aha! Yes, he's Rabastan's son! (He's actually Bellatrix's *nephew* though--his mom is named Belvina--because Bellatrix was married to Rodolphus, not Rabastan. But you are sick so I won't blame you for missing the 'auntie Bella' line!)

And YEAH; had he been brought up by Narcissa and Lucius... Terribleness...

I hadn't originally planned on Isobel being gay, but just as soon as I started writing her POVs, I realized that she was (which is why she was always vaguely wondering about other peoples' sexualities). She sort of had a crush on Emily, but didn't realize it--which motivated a lot of her behavior.

Understanding the basis of Tristan's self-loathing does rather validate the intensity of his angst, huh! And such a big part of early Potter was the idea that we are defined by our choices, and that no one can just be BORN evil. So I drew that out in Tristan in a big way (also, I just really wanted to examine the experiences of a Death Eaters child).

As I've said before, Tristan really is the anti-Potter. Both were adopted after losing their parents in the war, but Tristan loves his adopted parents while Harry hates living with the Dursleys. Harry loves Hogwarts and wants to live there year-round, while Tristan loves the muggle world and resents Hogwarts. The Potters are heroes, the Lestranges are villains. Harry grows up not realizing that he's famous, Tristan grows up knowing exactly how infamous his parents were (but lives in obscurity under a false identity).

Gosh, I can't believe there's only one chapter left! Thank you so much for coming along on this strange little journey with me!


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Review #45, by AlexFanL'optimisme: Similes

12th December 2014:
I should warn you that I am sick so if I sound like Iím not making any sense at any point in time, that is most likely the reason as to why.

I donít know how to put this into words properly but I like how you took the theme of similes and connected it to romantic writers like Byron, and Wordsworth, and Milton because if the reader has read anything written by them, then they would be able to see the connection.

It kind of startled me when you mentioned Advent because I never really pictured Dumbledore as a religious man. I always thought of him as someone who would be open to the idea of religion but wouldnít have invested much time in it privately. And even in your story, it feels like he goes along with the custom of going to church more so to fit in rather than because of his belief in God.

I like how you brought out some of Dumbledoreís arrogance here, because you see it in the books but itís more mellow in the series. When Dumbledore is faced with the fact that someone besides him might have figured out the properties of dragon blood, it really hits you that he knew he was the best, he didnít just think it, but he knew for a fact that he was the best and the idea that someone could do something that he, the best, could not is just unbelievable.

I like how you included how Dumbledore was dealing with the fact that he had defeated the man that he cared for, and how he was still attracted to Grindelwald. (I also feel really proud to catch onto and understand all of the references that you made to Verdi and Goethe). Iíve said it before and Iíll say it again, this story isnít too slow but youíve got to have patience and the time to properly sit down and read it and digest whatís happening and going on.

Author's Response: Hi there again! :) Thank you so much for stopping by again - and no worries about it! Hope you get better soon! :)

I just had to include poets when talking about similies and imagery - it seemed so fitting! And Byron and Wordsworth are so lovely, though, admittedly, not my favourite poets. Though they do have beautiful imagery (and, helpfully, they fit the time frame :P)!

Yeah, same, exactly! I never thought he'd be very religious - if he ever was as a child, definitely not after what happened (and I don't even think as a child, tbh) - but I really wanted to include a Christmas chapter - a sort of holiday kinda chapter, so that's where that came from. The religion just sort of came along due to the place and time it was set :)

Haha, he is kinda arrogant in the books at times, right? :P But yeah, I think it's something which would affect him greatly, in a kind of competitive sort of way, because it's his thing, you know? and he doesn't want someone else doing it instead of him. Plus yeah, he doesn't want to think that someone else could :P

I really want to emphasise in this how it didn't really ever end, so yeah, he keeps on loving him and keeps wanting him - I'm so glad you like it, though, because it's one of those things which can divide people ;) Haha, yeah, Verdi and Goethe... only in this story would I ever include those two, lol.

Thank you so so much for the wonderful review - it was so great to get, as always! :)

Aph xx


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Review #46, by AlexFanGet in Line: Fire and Flight

8th December 2014:
Yes Jordan! I love how she just shut down James when he tried to shame her for her active sex life. Like excuse you, if a guy can sleep around without anyone saying a peep about it then so can a girl. I love how Jordan shut him down about it though, "I wish people would shaming me for enjoying sex." I would've personally been more aggressive but I lack patience.

The ending was so cute and I love how they got to know each other a little bit and they talked and stuff and it was just great (also as a side note, I totally called the Scorpius thing). You know, I feel like James and Jordan are forcing their hatred of each other simply because of their families and the houses that they're in. When they're not being pressure to act a certain way and worrying about what everyone will think of them, they get along really well. I am so excited to see where their weird relationship goes from here. CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT AW YES.

Author's Response: RIGHT?! I had the biggest grin on my face when I was writing the part where Jordan calls James out. Slut shaming is a total no no in my book.

I loved the ending too. It was so much fun to write and I had warm fuzzy feels when I pictured them lying on the forest floor together. AHHH I feel like it's bad how in I am with my characters.

Anyway, thank you so much for the lovely review! You're a doll xx


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Review #47, by AlexFanfall.: fall.

6th December 2014:
The minute I started reading this story, I just knew that I would be in for the kind of story that is really deep and makes me think about my life and all of the choices that Iíve made. The beginning of your story made me think of growing old and how all of these things that we consider important and dedicate time and energy to will be meaningless in the end when we die.

The imagery in this is beautiful, it isnít overloaded with description but thereís just something about it that gives me a clear picture in my head of what the setting looks like and what the characters are doing and just the general tone of the story.

I love how you connected something like autumn to what Rose is going through. Everything about this story just fits together so perfectly and relates to each other. The trees and the leaves and the season all work together with what Rose is feeling and the situation that she has found herself in. Everything mentioned has some role in the story and serves some kind of purpose and I really like that.

All in all, I thought that this was really well written and really great! I honestly have no criticism for you and I wish you good luck in your challenge!

Author's Response: Hi! First off, thanks for the review. I am very sorry it took me ages to respond but I hope you know that this review was loved and appreciated from the moment I read it. :)

Your first few sentences really touched a cord in me. When I wrote this piece, it was near and dear to my heart and I was in a really emotional place. I am glad that it touched something inside you as well. Sometimes, it surprises me how people interpret the words that I've written. Thank you for that.

To be honest, I am normally prone to overloading things with sensory details! Sensory details are just my most favorite things ever. But I pared it down with this one since I did write it down by hand first AND because I think it suited the tone that I was trying to go with. I'm glad you like it.

When I thought about autumn (or fall.) I thought about how it was such a cunning word. It could mean so many things, good and bad, common and extraordinary. I wanted to bring that into this story without using too many words.

Your review was brilliant and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

--Carla


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Review #48, by AlexFanYear Five: O.W.L.s

6th December 2014:
Oh my goodness, their studying sounds absolutely terrible, I canít imagine how much pressure it must be to be tested on everything that youíve learned since you started Hogwarts. Can you just imagine how hardcore Ravenclaws wouldíve gone on studying for the OWLs, Iím not sure if they wouldíve been more hardcore than Hermione or equally as hardcore.

Iím happy to see that Tristan has at least put his time to good use and is studying. I was wondering when he was going to put his time to good use really, but Iím actually proud of him that heís managed to pull himself out of his despair long enough to focus on his school work. I canít imagine how difficult that mustíve been for him to do. I hope he does well on his exams at least.

What are the chances that the very first question on Laurelís test would be the one that sheís the most familiar with, itís almost as if the universe is laughing at her and the joke that theyíve just made. I definitely think Laurel will do well on her OWLs, I mean, sheís been studying just as hard as the rest of her friends so Iím sure sheíll pass them. And besides, Iím sure that thereís something that Laurel could do with in the wizarding world even if she didnít get as many OWLs as she hoped.

You know, when you really think about it, Hogwarts is really stressful because itís almost like, you do well on all of your exams and youíre able to get a good job, or you fail them and essentially end up with something that might not pay you all that well, and you canít go into the muggle world because you have no muggle education so you wouldnít get hired because you wouldnít have any muggle qualifications. But thereís also the option of starting your own company and that can work out really well, like in the case of Fred and George.

OH MY GOD WHAT FRESH HELL IS THIS YOU CANíT JUST KILL TRISTAN LIKE THAT OH MY GOD WHY WOULD YOU HURT ME IN THIS WAY I JUST CANíT RIGHT NOW I DONíT KNOW WHAT TO DO. I mean sure, Tristan has his problems and his flaws but heís a good person underneath all of that. But at least they got to Tristan in time, I just really hope that he makes it through this. Poor, poor Tristan.

I did not know that I would be going on a feel trip when I first started reading this story.

Author's Response: First off, I KNOW! I'M SO SORRY!

Gah, I just... I realized it was going to happen, and I couldn't keep it from happening! I mean, Ian Curtis was the FIRST musical reference, and then all the Kurt Cobain stuff. And the Lake kept absorbing all this weird symbolism, and the idea of jumping into a dark unknown became a common theme.

The story and characters just really took on lives of their own! The original concept was this really funny, wacky little idea of writing about Hogwarts stoners. But then I realized I didn't want to glamourize substance use, so I had to put in its realistic consequences. And then, substance abuse is usually a symptom of other problems, so then THAT happened. And then the story exploded out from there.

As for the other stuff, I'm so glad that the study stress came off! I really wanted to capture that mania, and give it feeling, so yay! And hah, Laurel's charms exam was almost word-for-word how Harry's first exam went in the books (only his question was about Wingardium Levoisa). He smiled though, whereas she rolled her eyes. That reference and counter-point is basically this whole story in a nutshell ;)

I hope you feel this story comes to a satisfying conclusion!

xoxo
-Roisin



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Review #49, by AlexFanYear Five: The Presence of Love

28th November 2014:
It appears that being ďin loveĒ with Tristan is a lot more work than itís worth. Honestly, Emily needs to move on from Tristan because itís not going anywhere. Sheís pined after him for so long but nothing but hurt has come from it so I think itís time for her to move on. I get that love isnít always easy, but whatever Emily and Tristan have isnít even functional let alone hard, how are they going to work towards something that is so broken, Iím not even sure that it can be fixed anymore?

I have to agree with Dumbledore on one aspect, suspending students seems absolutely absurd because all that happens is that they use it as free time and do whatever they want, unless theyíve got strict parents, in which case, there would be severe consequences.

I kind of feel like Emily is seeing a whole other world in her friendship with everyone else than the rest of her friends are. I know that there isnít mutual respect between them, infinite loyalty is most definitely not one of those things either, or deep affection for that matter. It almost seems like she is so unattached to what her friendships are really like that Emily has created this idea in her mind where everyone is really close and having a great time, when in reality, itís anything but.

When I saw the length of this chapter, Iíll admit, it was a little daunting (but this was mostly due to the fact that Iím doing homework as I read your story so the idea of focusing on two things at once for a lengthy period of time was a little scary). But I can see that it was necessary, you covered the families and what kind of homes Laurel, Emily, Isobel, and Tristan went home to and what they had to deal with. Laurel has an abusive mother, and honestly, sheís come out pretty good considering how horribly her mother treats her. Isobelís family treats her as if sheís a stupid child that doesnít know better, and I get that theyíre trying to help her get back on the right track, but theyíre obviously not going about it the right way.

Oh my goodness, poor Emily! I canít believe what this girl went through as a child! Oh my God I want to punch Andrew in the face so much! (I want to do much worse things to him but I have to keep this twelve plus so I canít exactly go into detail, but I assure you, that it is in fact very painful.) Protect young girls at all costs, educate them on how to live healthy lives and how to be confident and most importantly, keep creepy older men away from them.

And as always, I am amazed at how much time, research, effort, and thought that you put into your story, itís what makes it so great and so interesting, you can really see all of the effort that you put into it shine in every chapter!

Author's Response: You are on FIRE right now! Thank you!

Loving Tristan is definitely a HUGE amount of work. And yeah, I once knew someone to get suspended for skipping too much school. Like... what???

Part of it, also, is that this story picks up during such a tumultuous time. They have some years of friendship behind them where Em's analysis might make more sense.

Ugh, I couldn't figure out a way to split or pare down this chapter--I'm SO glad you think it's ok as long as it is!

I agree--Laurel isn't so bad, considering everything. She's been pretty bad these last few chapters, so I'd hoped that seeing a bit of her home life would explain where she's coming from. And yeah, I think the wisdom of Isobel's parents' actions is very up to interpretation. In a way, it's good they are stepping in, and actually DOING something about it. Then again, you and Laurel both make good points.

I definitely wanted to show the flaws of different parenting strategies: the controlling-ness of Isobel and Laurel's, vs the permissive-ness of Emily and Tristan's. We mostly see the Madley's in a stellar light, but then here, we see that something terrible happened to their daughter very much under their roof.

I'm really glad you appreciate all that time and research! And I definitely put a lot of thought into these grittier and more sensitive elements, and pushed myself to write with as much accuracy and realism as possible (and it was often very difficult and uncomfortable and frustrating to do)--so I'm so happy you think it's worth it!

Thank you so much for another review!






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Review #50, by AlexFanYear Five: The Question

27th November 2014:
Sorry for taking so long with your review but Iím here! And I must say, everyone has gotten a lot more aggressive since the last chapter, especially Emily, I didnít think that this girl had it in her to be so mean to Isobel of all people. And itís not like Isobel has done anything wrong either, sheís trying to help her friend and look out for everyone and this is how she gets paid in return. Everyone is so wrapped up in their own problems that they donít even notice that Isobel is slowly wasting away.

Iím not entirely sure how Tristan shows affection but I seriously doubt that he really likes Emily in the same way that she likes him. Iím sorry, but I just donít buy it. ďHmm, I really like this girl but I donít want to hurt her feelings so instead Iím going to get into bed with her best friend and not tell her about it because thatís really such a great idea,Ē like really Tristan, come on now. I get heís not one for affection but he had to try a little harder than just that.

I was about to say, wow, for someone thatís evil, Quirrel sure seems to get along with his students, and then he assaulted Isobel and my opinion went back to being normal lickity split after that. I canít believe that he would do such a thing! Itís absolutely disgusting that he would assault one of his students like this and it is absolutely horrifying to think that this couldíve happened to other girls other than Isobel. Itís horrifying to think of just how many girls this has really happened to, and they probably never spoke up about it either because no one would believe them. Can you imagine how many girls were probably terrified of going to class because they would be confronted with assaulter.

Oo, if I was there, Quirrel would need a place to hide!

And Iím not entirely sure that a place as shady as the Hogs Head is really the best place to take Isobel after what happened to her. The pub doesnít exactly scream safe if you get what I mean.

ISOBEL DONíT YOU DARE BLAME YOURSELF FOR WHAT HAPPENED. SHE IS IN NO WAY RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT QUIRREL DID, HE IS THE ONE THAT SHOULD BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT HE DID! I didnít expect anything less from Hagrid, I just knew that he would defend Isobel and remind her that she is not at fault for the incident that took place. I love that he urged her to talk to someone and report it because it was important and something needed to be done. Hagrid is the best.

This was so great!

Author's Response: Hahahaha, I love your reviews. Like "everything is terrible, they are the worst, this is great!" You always pick up on all of the bad decisions and behaviors that go into this story, and I'm so glad you still like it!

Yeah, Emily had pretty much been the only consistently Good character, which is why I needed to make her have a little spat of immaturity. Everyone's going through a lot of changes and difficulties, and Emily definitely fell into the 'kill the messenger' behavior. Also, she's totally misdirecting her anger and frustration :(

Tristan't capacity for self-loathing and self-destruction is one of his most problematic qualities, because it ends up hurting people outside of himself :( I definitely agree that he doesn't like Emily the /same/ way, but I wouldn't say he likes her less than she likes him. But that gets examined later, so I'll zip it for now :]

I'm really glad you felt so outraged by Quirrel, that's definitely the right reaction. That bit is something inspired by RL. I get really mad when teacher/student stuff gets romanticized, because it's so inherently unethical and exploitative and abusive.

Yes, the Hog's Head definitely wasn't the best choice! (Not least, because Quirrel was THERE). BUT, I really wanted her to talk to Hagrid--I'm so happy you think I did him justice!

Thank you so much for your review!
xoxo
-Roisin


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