This story was well written. It showed a lot of emotion about the way the Regulus finally changed for the better.
I often hoped that Sirius had felt that his younger brother had changed his way of thinking and I think you put that across perfectly.
10/10 and adding to favs.Author's Response: Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I am glad that you liked it! Regulus is one of my favorite characters so I am super happy to know that I was able to pull the emotion of the situation out and show it.
Yay! Thanks for the fav! =)
-SR17 Report Review
This is a very good start for your first attempt. I think you have Snape down really well with the way he acted towards Harry with the comments of contempt he always feels. Though you did take me by surprise when he seemed to suddenly show a slight flicker of sorrow for young Harry.
Yes you are of to a good start with your first fanfiction and I look forward to reading more.
One more thing before I sign off. If you could be a bit more descriptive with some of the situations, you'll find that the story will go a lot further. 9/10 and adding to favs.Author's Response: thankyou, i have tried to be more detailed in this next chapter. The chapter is ready to be posted. but the site won't let non trusted authors to post any more chapters at the moment :) Report Review
So Joy could be a witch, I wonder how Vernon will react to that news if he ever finds out. Once again you've produced another excellent chapter and I can't wait to see what you have planned for the rest of your story.
Another 10/10 and adding to both fav lists. Please update soon.Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing Magicmuggle. That gives me a drive to get on with the story. After a break I'll try to post another chapter in near future.
Wow, once again you've produced another good chapter. I can't wait to see the reunion with his parents.
I must move on. Another 10/10. Report Review
Well, this story gets more and more mysterious as it goes along.
I love some of the references to characters names, such as naming the dog Sirius. And I'm now beginning to sense some motive behind all this.
Another 10/10 and moving on. Report Review
Well I must admit, this is something different to the usual Dudley stories that I've read so far.
It'll be interesting to see how different this one will be to them.
10/10 for your start and must on. Report Review
Once again another wonderful chapter. And I think you have the characters down to a T.
I loved the bit about the Dragon Scale cauldron, how ever did youi come up with that idea?
Another full marks and moving on.Author's Response: I don't remember how I came up with them actually. I remember I was desperately needing something that Severus would refuse to get because James suggested it, and I think that was the first thing that came to mind. I'm really glad you like the characters. This new chapter I'm writing I'm hoping it still stays true to them since I haven't written anything for this story in a while. Thanks for the read and review! Report Review
Wow, this chapter was so good. I have never read a better indepth version of Sevs feelings towards Lily.
Wonderful start and 10/10. Must move on.Author's Response: magicmuggle, your reviews always make my day! I log on to see a couple new reviews and they're always from you! :D I'm glad you like this story. I'm waiting for two things to go through validation and this is the next thing in line to get a chapter update! :) Thank you so much for coming over to read and review! Report Review
Ah, cliffie. Oh well I'm pretty much as bad for them myself.
I love how you show the love between both Ron and Hermione. And I think Hermie's dad will come round soon enough.
Watch your spacing though, you've got some big gaps.
Anyway lovely chapter and 9/10.Author's Response: :) Thank you and I'll keep that in mind :) Report Review
Once again you've produced another excellent chapter. You certainly know how to put mystery into a story.
As to Lucille, I wouldn't even like to hazard a guess as to what she may have done to anger The Dark Lord.
Another 10/10 and moving on. Report Review
Wow what a brilliant start. You've really done a great job with Luc, it was almost as if I was there sharing her tormented soul.
10/10 and toi move on. Report Review
I loved this little story. I could just imagine the look on Draco's face when he realised that he wouldn't be waited on hand and foot by the house elves. And then you throw in the mishap with the way he started to prepare his meal, chuckled at that one.
You might want to go through this again though. You do have one or two spelling and grammer mistakes, such as,
**Draco had got out a dish and started to through in eggs without craking them**
In this bit I think you meant THROW instead of through,. And CRACKING instead of craking.
All in all, a nice story and 9/10.Author's Response: Hello,
This story is my first and was posted years ago. Thanks for pointing out the mistakes and the constructive critisicm. I went through this story earlier this month and fixed up some mistakes. Sorry i missed those ones.
Thank you for reading and reviewing and for the great rating!!
~LillyLover22~ Report Review
Here I am with your requested review.
This is a nice story. I like your interrpertation of how Arthur and Molly meet for the first time. It kind of seems proper.
Though I don't think an important person like the Minister for magic would be interviewing people for lowly jobs for catering, He'd more likely be doing interviews for heads of departments. I'd maybe change that to Arthur doing the interviewing of Molly (as I read this, that was what I expected) and then something clicking into place.
I feel you could have gone into more detail with the feelings of Molly, maybe a few lines describing how she arrived at the Ministry that day, and her nervousness gripping her from the moment she woke up to the moment she arrived at the Ministry. And instead of the voice sounding bored, have it booming out Molly's name (is it Arthur calling Molly's name?) and startling her back to reality. That way you give more impact to your story.
Overall though I do like this little one shot and give you 8/10.Author's Response: Well I wrote this in a rush, and I was a little preoccupied, so I'm sorry it's not perfect. No it's not Arthur calling Molly's name. I wrote it how I wanted to and I am fine with it but I am sorry that you aren't. Thanks for the review. Report Review
The start to this story is great, you put in a a lot of excitment, tension and mystery in all the right places.
I was a bit shocked at Draco being made joint head ofd Gyrffindor and Neville being head of Hufflepuff. I never expected that move. And now you have me wondering who'll be the new chosen one.
9/10 for your start and adding to favs so I know when ytou update.Author's Response: Hahaha Wow, thanks! I'm all giddy...
Aha! That's all part of the plan ;)
EA x Report Review
This story was just beautiful. It really shows how devoted Dom was towards Scorp.
You put a lot of feeling into words, very emotional.
I loved the idea of putting all the feelings down in a book, it sounds like it helped a lot with the healing process.
And naming the boy twin with the middle name of his father was a nice way of remembering Scorpius.
Great story and 10/10 and adding to favs.Author's Response: Thank you so much! It really means a lot to me for this review and that you rate it 10/10 AND youre adding it to your favourites. Dom was sincerely devoted to Scorpius because she felt that her life was going in the right direction for once and he was to thank for it. Well thats how I thought it was when I was writing this one shot, which was so strange writing something so dark. I tried to put a lot into words because someone I know was in a bad place when this was written. I was writing this for her in a way and writing is how I would deal with something like what Dominique is going through. I had to put Scorpius in the name somewhere partly because I felt it was expected. Though I just thought it was right too so I put it in. Thanks again for such a lovely review!
Bex :) Report Review
Another wonderful chapter. You can really see that Draco has really got it bad for Tatiana.
But once again your acting the rotter part again, I really thought you were going to tell us what was on her arm. I nearly screamed when you appeared to start saying what it was then stopped dead.
I wonder what will happen when you finally reveal who Tatiana really is?
10/10 and please update soon.Author's Response: Oh it was just her iPod that she placed on her arm whuile laying on her stomac...it wasn't the dark mark, just a disappointing cliffhanger
Thanks for the review!!! Report Review
What a good one shot. You've really showed the friendship that the other mauraders had towards Remus. That they'd risk everything for their friendship.
Well done for this one, 10/10.Author's Response: awww thanks so much for the sweet review! I'm reall glad you liked it. :) Report Review
Oh no I thought you were going to have another liason between Draco and Hermione. I do hope your going to continue this flashback of Draco and Hermione getting together.
Another good chapter and 10/10.Author's Response: There will defiantly be more flash backs, to bring the story full circle, people have to understand why Ron and Hermione broke up and how she ended up with Draco, I do think that is important.
(it also allows room for foreshadowing)
I have the next flash back planned out, I just do not know if it will be the next chapter in line.
Thanks for reading!!-ash Report Review
I always thought (near the end of the books and films) that Draco was a misunderstood soul.
I liked your idea of how the two of them got together, it was very romantic.
10/10. Report Review
Oh dear, I do think it was a bit severe of Draco to do that to his daughter.
I had to chuckle at the apple for the teacher part, it reminded me of how tradtional it was to do that sort of thing.
Anyway, nice chapter and 10/10 and moving on.Author's Response: I think that as a father, Draco would dote on his daughter, but would be quite severe in punishment. Draco as an adult would recognize how easy it is to behave poorly and get away with it, and I think he would not want that for Dulcie.
Thanks for reading!-ash Report Review
This was just beautiful. I just simply love this little story. I was a bit saddened when I realised that Luna had died but the way the boys father used in keeping the memory of their mother alive was simply beautiful.
Well done for this wonderful one shot and 10/10. Adding to favs.Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much! :D Report Review
I simply love to read about anything to do with Dudley or the other Dursley's. I always thought that it was a shame that there was not more to do with Big D changing in the books.
This is such a nice reunion story and I feel that you could have got a second (kind of sequel) story about some kind of story where the Potter and Dursley get to know each other, Then Anna could get to know her famous cousin Harry Potter.
10/10 and adding to favs. Report Review
Something tells me that James Potter 11 had better watch out. And Ariana sounds like one crazy mixed up person. This story sounds like it's going to be every bit as good as your Elizabeth story.
I'll reserve anymore comments until I read more. But 10/10 so far for your wonderful start and once again adding to favs so I know when you update.
By the way. I loved the idea in your Royalty story of William and Kate having two children. And if you do go into anything historical about the British Royal Family, I will certainly help with keeping you correct.Author's Response: Im glad you like this story. This one is a special one.
Thanks alot, for your help with royalty. I kinda do need it. Report Review
Here with your review.
When I saw that this was to be a story concerning Princess Elizabeth, I thought right away of my (and other Brits) Queen Elizabeth the second. I see you've put down that she had a brother in your story which leads me to believe that this is not about our Queen Elizabeth. So I wonder if you could clear up the question, is it about the British Queen?
Anyway, this sounds like it's going to be a pretty good story. I loved the bit about horizontal Alley, that far cracked me up.
All in all agreat start and I look forward to reading more.
9/10 and adding to favs so I know when you update.Author's Response: Hi.
No, It isnt about your Queen Elizabeth. I picked the name Elizabeth for two reasons mostly,
1) I have a thing for that name. I blame Pride and Prejudice.
2) Queen Elizabeth (II) is her great grandmother as her father is the reigning monarch of England (i.e she is will and katherine's daughter). So she was named after her great grandmother.
Now, I'm not british. If I'm factually incorrect in any way, in any of the other chapters, please please please let me know.
Im glad that you find this story promising. It is very encouraging for young writers like myself. Elizabeth is a very special character to me. Im happy that people like her quirkiness.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE REVIEW AND FAVORITE!!! Report Review
Nice very nice indeed. I loved everything about this chapter.
Can't wait to read your update. So 10/10 adding to favs and please update soon.Author's Response: Thank you :) Means lots! Will try and update very soon. Report Review
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