THIS STORY, ohmygosh. This story is too amazing. I love LOVE Albus, your characterization is awesome.
A mafia group? HOW EXCITING.
I'm sorry, this review is a bad mix of squealing and caps-locks, but the writing is so good that it literally excites me. I promise to leave a more coherent review, for the next chapter.
-Nell :) xxAuthor's Response: Hii,
Wow, thank you! Caps-lock and squealing goes down well in my book :3 Hopefully I'll get another chapter up soon but school and exams will, I'm sure, be the death of me.
Tasha Report Review
*FLASHES my HISPTER TRIANGLE*
Am I first, do I get a cookie?
This is hilarious.
I like Millie, she's very different to Spencer, she's snarkier and I love her banter with Berkley. It wasn't mainstream at all.
'It’s just that Professor Clearwater is like a shit that won’t flush.' - What a simile, I have put it in my metaphor/simile bank for theft and use later on!
Millie seems to be more of the angry hipster, who has her existential crisis and then takes out her angst on other people, right? I'm rambling now! :)
Anyway, update wonderland and this as soon as you can! (I'm not one to talk about updating!)
Nell xAuthor's Response: YOU ARE IN FACT FIRST; VIRTUAL COOKIES TO ALL!!!
But seriously, Nell, thank you so much for reviewing; I'm having new story anxiety. I'm like, "IT'S BEEN OUT FOR TEN MINUTES AND NO ONE HAS REVIEWED YET. NOBODY LIKES ME."
But I'm SO glad that you like it; I am so unbelievably nervous about this story and so afraid that it lacks in the hipster department, so I am so relieved!
I tried to make Millie different from Spencer; when I first started writing it, it was kind of like Spencer-at-Hogwarts so I'm glad that I fixed the problem!
And yeah, Millie has a lot of pent up anger and she's not the type of person to have a heart-to-heart and get all of her feelings off of her chest so this is kind of a release for her.
Thank you SO much for reading and reviewing! I'll try to update this and Wonderland as soon as possible! :D Report Review
THIS IS SO COOL.
(i'm tired and i just had a gcse exam today, so excuse the incoherence of my review)
I love couples that fake date, it's like my -second- favourite romantic convention. I like Aimee she has spunk! :)
nell :)Author's Response: aww, thanks! im glad you liked it :D good luck on your gcse's, though :D
i like couples that fake date, as well, and ive always wanted to write one. so i wrote this. i dont know how its going to go, so we'll see :D
thanks, ellie :) xx Report Review
i'm like totally eons late with this. Spin off-y/sequel to The First, from Spring to Summer, I'm already loving this.
I'm team Louis! Onen he likes her, so he therefore wins in my opinion and he looks like Matt Hitt, so evidently he's the smexiest option. The fact that you list him first on the banner is sign from your subconscious that he's a more important character, therefore he is Piper's true love or you know, person she ends up with. (I'm looking into things too deeply now)
the naming is all very awesome. WORDPLAY! Piper-Pipe Dream is a pun, I will eventually steal in the near future.
update soon (I'm a total hypocrite to say things like this)
err, sorry for the incoherent fan girl review :)
I'll make it up with hearts: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
10/10Author's Response: Don't worry about that! I'm glad you like it ^^
I had to include Scorp somehow!:D
God, he's totally the smexiest, however I'm not going to give away whether your theory is right XD
I KNOW I WAS SO PROUD OF MYSELF FOR THINKING OF THAT!! :D you're welcome to steal it;)
Yay I'm happy you think so!
I shall try! (You too! I'm on my toes for Advice for Animals!)
YAY HEARTS (I'll accept them even though the review wasn't incoherent at all! XD )
Thank you, much love x Report Review
cliche, I'm like the cliche fangirl advocate, this was delicious to read. The all so obvious over denial of a crush, the overdramatic hatred is perfect. There was so much characterization within this one shot of Flo. 'twas very good, excellent in fact.
A bit Lily Evans/James Potter-esque, which is never a bad thing. ♥
this was just generally awesome and I totally just rantravedreviewed.
Nell :) xAuthor's Response: I love cliches too - but not when they are forced into some kind of ridiculous thing which makes you want to stab your own eyeballs out with its predictability and general-suckiness. Hopefully this does not fall into that category.
Over dramatic hatred - that sums it up perfectly, and I couldn't think of the words for it. I didn't think it was descriptive enough actually, so thank you :)
Lily/James - I didn't even think about that. Guess grandad gave more than his hair to my little Alby.
'twas a lovely review, thank you so much :)
Ellie :D x Report Review
She is so naive and nutty it's adorable.
I’d fudging drink a bowl of his saliva. - This line made me laugh loads and have horrible mental imagery.
Ozzy is horrible in that typical little brother way :)
I can't wait to see more interaction between Albus and Susie (and James).
Nell :) xxAuthor's Response: I love Susie for being so nutty, it's so much fun to write!
I stole that line from my friend talking about the new hot foreign exchange student in my school. She's hilarious ;)
Thank you so much for the review! It made me happy :) Report Review
I love the tension between Pippa and Albus, and just their relationship in general. Albus is so creepy, but in a cool emotionless way.
I love Pippa, as usual, and it's really nice to see her and Cassie together for a bit, their friendship has really interesting dynamics.
"I could do fake better than I could do real."
I love this line. It says so much about Pippa's character in just a few words and yeah, the characterisation is just mind-blowing, hence why you won the dobby and all :)
Great chapter and I'm really excited to see what happens in the next! :)
Nell :) xxAuthor's Response: NELL!
Thanks! I enjoy writing the tension, a lot. Yes, the boy is pretty creepy, but I like writing him like that. He knows how to put her on edge.
I'm so happy you like Pippa. Yep. I just love writing their friendship, it's real, but it's not real in a lot of different ways. I mean, Pippa always takes Cassie for granted, like how she will always forgive her and she will always be in her life. But it's so pure in a lot of other ways.
Thank you! I'm so glad you like that line. Aw, you're so nice, I'm seriously still so surprised that I won.
Thank you so much, hopefully it'll come out soon :) thanks so much for the wonderful review, it's made my day and I hope you have a great day Nell.
xxx Report Review
Absolutely loved this chapter! Rory's character is developing.
But it's the writing style that makes me adore this story, I wish I could write like you, I'm so jealous right now that I have actually turned green.
Also, I love how english this is like when you use the word 'lippy', I like the feel that I know it's English rather than American like lots of fanfiction.
Nell :) xx Report Review
Aaah, I love that scene in the notebook, it's too good. Absolutely adored the chemistry between Spencer and James this chapter, their relationship is progressing nicely. I love Spencer's character, she's funny, amusing and a bit out there but not over the top to the extent that she is annoying.
Can't wait till the next chapter! :) xAuthor's Response: Thank you! I love that scene in The Notebook too! When I decided that they were gonna lay down in the road together, I couldn't resist putting the reference in there.
I really like James and Spencer together and I'm glad that you do too! It's also nice to hear (er...read) that Spencer isn't annoying; I'm always nervous that she comes across that way.
Thanks for reading and for the lovely review! (By the way, I loved chapter 6 of Dear Imagination! :D) Report Review
LOVE IT ♥
and it's majorly pre-written! bonus, right there.
I'm in love with the premise and the characters and you're writing and genuinely just everything.
You're distinct narrative stance and style, give you an immediate feel for the characters. I really like Clara!
update soon! ♥Author's Response: Aww thank you! Major prewriting is the only way I can update anymore and even pretend to be able to guarantee eventual completion, sadface. I didn't even intend to write this, actually. It was all a con! I was conned into it! And... now it's going frightfully swimmingly and do not know what to feel about it. So glad you liked it, and I'll do my best to update soon! So busy this month, but thank you again and I hope you continue to enjoy! Report Review
What a wonderful ending, I think it was really fitting for the story. I liked the fact they didn't get married, it makes it extremely realistic and just... (I'm slightly lost for words)
This story was completely enchanting, the characters were absolutely fantastic, each flawed in their own way (not in a cliche way either) and all developed in varying ways throughout the novel, which was clearly evident in the epilogue as you described.
I literally just watched both versions (disney and live) of Peter Pan this morning with my little sisters, who are having a pirate phase, and I squeed at the chapter title and think it's extremely fitting for the contents.
The final pairings were great, of course Albus and Ranny and then I really liked Scorpius and Olivia, I didn't see it but it fits quite nicely. I like how Ranny took up photography too.
I am absolutely thrilled to see that their book is still there on the shelf, it made the story come full circle. I also adored the fact Albus came in and helped Ranny and ended up moving in, it seems so suave and secretly romantic.
I've absolutely loved this story and am slightly sad to see it ending, since it's been one of the few stories on this site that have been able to keep my interest (which is really hard, I seem to have a short attention span). it's such a pity to see it end, but at least it ended on a fantastic note.
♥ ♥ ♥
(sorry for the ramble)
-Nell :) xAuthor's Response: But it's a beautiful ramble! I love rambeling! ;)
Thank you so much for a lovely review! Originally they were going to get married right out of Hogwarts, like a couple of characters did in one of my other stories, but I thought that at the pace that all of the characters were growing up, it just didn't seem realistic for them to do :)
You're lost for words? :O Well, I'm really flattered :D
I'm so pleased that you did enjoy this as much as you did! I love writing character flaws, they make them so much more realistic for me to do, and I enjoy writing them a lot more.
Peter Pan is a classic :) I couldn't not include it, but I'm glad that you think it fits!
Honestly, until sitting down to write this chapter, I didn't see Scorpius and Olivia either. :) I wanted to include all of the characters in the epilogue that I could, and I remembered Olivia, and how I had always planned for her and Ranny to be friends, but their wasn't enough time to include it in the rest of the story, and when I sat down to write, a relationship between her and Scorpius just began to almost write itself!
I like that you find it suave and romantic, I would think more sneaky and manipulative ;) I'm kidding, but I'm sure he had selfish reasons for doing it too.
Thank you again, I don't know how many times I have said 'thank you' to you over the time of this story, but I hope that you know I appreciate every lovely review! Report Review
Awesome chapter! I loved it, I like how Spencer refuses to be pushed around and has decided to figure out what's going on.
I love this story, it's one of the few stories on this site that can genuinely get me to chuckle out loud.
nell :) xAuthor's Response: Thank you! I'm glad that you enjoyed it! And that it made you laugh! That's always nice to hear; I'm not used to writing funny stories so I'm not 100% confident in my comic abilities.
I'm trying to get the next chapter out much faster than I did for this one so hopefully you won't have to wait too long for the next update! Expect some more investigating on Spencer's part. Thanks for reading and for the lovely review! :D Report Review
I'm not sue what to think, this chapter was really good but I'm really skeptical of Albus, I'm wondering what he actually wants with June.
Fantastic writing as usual! :) x Report Review
Once again, fantastic chapter title. Painted bathrobe to look like a kimono? That's extremely cracky.
I adore Miranda, she's crazy but not in that annoying quirky fangirl way.
I loved the letters between karma and Miranda, you need to stop being unbearably witty and funny.
♥ ♥ Report Review
Perfect ending, not sickly or anything.
I giggled a fair bit this chapter, skipping the first step. genius, why hadn't anyone tried that? ;) ♥
'his lips for the nth time' - my inner algebra nerd dances.
I shamelessly didn't review the last chapter, I am snowed under with video work, but I'm glad to see Albus and Izzy's sweet little cameo.
'A place of mystery, a construct created by the human imagination and fear and desire for the unknown. And also by ancient magic.' - Absolutely adored this line, absolutely wonderful writing.
I will miss this, but now I should move on to reading your over stuff. :)
It was a fantastic story, and the pacing/style/characters were amazing.
AND I SHALL MISS CILLIAN, dearly. :(
♥ ♥ ♥ Report Review
Ohmygosh, you are fantastic, I love the fact that she's not a seer, I love the concept and can't wait to see where you go with it.
♥ Report Review
I love this, it is insane. ♥
Violence, swearing, utter-looniness and an awesome awesome narration stance. The third person singular is awesome and it carries the tone of the story wonderfully. You can just feel all the thoughts of the characters.
Witty chapter titles ♥
Also, I love all the names of the characters, their not too outlandish but very awesome at the same time.
Update soon!Author's Response: Insane is my favorite vaguely-fic-related adjective :D And violence, swearing, looniness, and vivid narration are just some of the things I /love/ seeing in fic. Basically this story is extremely self-indulgent and hopefully amusing because of it. The one thing I was a bit iffy about was the present tense, actually, because when I write it, it's usually very angsty and full of narrator-comments like "He is an idiot, and he will never realize it, which is why he is so ironic." See, very angsty, so this was a rapid shift for me, and I'm glad it worked :D
Witty chapter titles are love and naming is usually very difficult for me (never indulge me if I ask for naming help, because in all likelihood I will not listen) but these pretty much just came to me. (Also, I've used three of these names before in other fic, both published and dead. Their AU selves are probably trying to stab me for what I've done.)
So basically, I was really happy to see this and thank you for reviewing! Report Review
Last third, I don't want this to be over. I'll miss my regular Cillian dose, I mean he chortles in an irish manner. An irish manner.
I didn't mind the jumpiness to much, it wasn't overly jumpy, like as if the chapter was high on sugar or hyper.
The arabian night reference was very simple and was easy to pick up.
(Btw, I'm on my phone- so no hearts for you D: )Author's Response: I never thought about the imminent end in those terms. No more Cillian? No more Irish chortling? ;A; But let's look at the bright side -- ... which I have yet to find. Now I'm depressed. Anyway: yay for lack of sugar-high! And yay for a reference that is actually not obscure! I haven't figured out how to do symbols on my phone either, but since I am not on my phone, here you go! ♥ Report Review
So, I'm loving the brotherly stuff stub-plot that's been building up and really come out during this chapter, because it's wonderfully realistic. I love Jack's maturity and fraternal bond/love/connection with his brother in this chapter, despite the obvious flaws in their relationship.
Al is such a sweetheart.
Marilyn is well, Maleficent.
Update soon! ♥Author's Response: Thank you for the review! I'm so pleased that you're still enjoying this! :)
Writing Jack and Tom is something that I found both easy and difficult; I'm an only child, so I don't really understand just quite how far that bond will go, but I love to write it, because I love watching how my friends and cousins fight with their siblings :)
Thank you again! I hope that you like the rest! Report Review
That was wonderful, I loved Al, it was the perfect amount of charming without that overtly sweet stuff that makes me want to slam my laptop shut and consider why I'm reading fanfiction. (It's happened once or twice).
Anyway, I ♥ this. Have I mentioned this is my favourite fanfic on this site? Because it is.
Nell :)Author's Response: Thank you so much! You're very kind!
I'm glad that you're still enjoying this! :)
I love writing Albus, he's one of my favourites, so I'm glad that you like his charming-ness.
I'm not a fan of the sugary sweet stuff either; I love your reaction though ;)
Really? You're so sweet! I hope that you like the rest; I'm very flattered! Report Review
HO- LOL, JK. ROBINX1000 ♥
I loved their relationship, the action, the writing, the everything. People have this thing where they grow up and they forget that they still need to have fun and carefree. ♥
Absolute wonderfulness ♥Author's Response: Thank you for the review!
I'm glad that you're still enjoying this. Nice italics; I can never figure out how to do that ;)
This was possibly my favourite chapter to write, so I'm pleased that you liked it!
Growing up is a very difficult thing, and I wanted to write something about it, and this is what came out! Report Review
ROBINROBINROBIN ♥ ♥
So, i've been on holiday and I've just got back and I've realized i've got three chapters to enjoy, so my reviews will be scandalously brief.
I love this chapter, I love all the developments on the Albus/Ranny front it's just too... ♥ I love his character development, it's ridiculous how much I loved this chapter.
Off to read the next chapter! :)Author's Response: Thank you for the review!
I hope that you had a good holiday! You're very kind; I'm pleased that you're still enjoying this!
I'm really glad that you noticed Al's development as character; he's growing :)
I hope that you like the rest! Report Review
Oh, Benedict Cumberbatch knickers, wherefore art thou? I'm ready to die now.
It's like you knew I was in love with him. ♥
I adored this chapter, it's was like lemonade, sweet for James and sour for Aurora. I love James, he's so jamespotterthefirst-esque, but in my opinion sweeter. I love Ginny and Aurora's mum, in fact I love all the parents in this fic, they're just so funny. I want some Harry too, that would be awesome. I want more of all the parents.
I can't wait for the next chapter (that should be like a hint that you have to update now) and the wedding and to see Rory's decision. ♥ ♥
Nell :) Report Review
I'm totally with Pippa on the cleaning thing, cleaning alone in a room is quite soothing, it takes your mind off of things. I like her love for systems is such a wonderful character trait.
I adore the way you describe Albus through Pippa's point of view. :)Author's Response: Thank you! I never had that original in her character plan, but it just came out in her as I wrote her and it's one of my favourtie things about her character. It just makes so much sense considering how uptight she is. And thank you! I've started to adore description! And describing Albus is one of my favourite things considering that's the only way you can learn about him right now as I have yet to reveal his back story. Thanks so much for the nice review, it means a lot to me! You've made my day, thanks again! xxx Report Review
I really just wanted to point out that this is probably my favourite opening chapter for any next-gen fic I've read, mainly because you get a lovely insight to the characters, Albus and Pippa especially but there's action and stuff going on. Most of the time it's just a running commentary, which is quite boring to read. :)
-nell :)Author's Response: That is such a huge compliment! Seriously! It's made my day. I just like to throw my readers into the action and things get revealed as things go by etc the house that they are in. It wouldn't make sense for Pippa to explain everything in the first chapter, because she's known these characters for years and I'm trying to do it properly through her eyes. Plus, I like to show how the characters are like through their acts rather than state all their qualities and who they are as a person so I'm so happy that you like what i'm doing as I'm always worried about these things. I'm also so glad you enjoyed this start! It means a lot to me! Thanks so much! xxx Report Review
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