Reading Reviews From Member: xtinjsc
  
235 Reviews Found

Review #1, by xtinjscLike You Mean It: 94 Days After

17th November 2011:
FIRST! :O

*throws confetti on herself*

*coughs*

Gahhh Taylorkins, this was absolutely fantastically hnngg-worthy! It wasn't the first time I've read your writing - heck it wasn't the first time I've read this one - but this delish thingamajinglebells of an awesome opening still gave me chills. Especially this line:

Have you seen this girl?

On its own it was nothing special, just a regular interrogative sentence, but what made it stand out was how you reached that line and how you set up the beginning paragraphs before it. There's always something about your writing that impresses me whenever I read anything from you (forum post not included, because they amuse me more than impress me - this is a compliment :P). Gurl, you know how to set up a mood like a boss! I love it when authors take their time to do that, to pay attention to the detail of the setting more, because imagining the scene in my head's so much easier and more satisfying for me. And gosh, you have a way with words that I found really, really poignant and refreshing. Every smile and movement were somehow more... I dunno, graceful? Teehee Like this, for example:

He paused briefly, distracted by the flutter of blonde hair and the waving of her delicate hand.

Technically, a wind just blew and she just moved her hand, but it just seemed infinitely more purrddyyy the way you put it like that. *flails*

I got a very clear idea of your characters. I thought you presented them really well and the dynamics between Gemma and Candice (excuse me for having a mental image of Chloebearsizzle for that one) was very believable. It reminded me of how my sister and I interact for some reason, because we always do get into silly shoving and fighting like that once in a while. Sometimes just because it felt natural and familiar, and sometimes - like Gemma and Candice - because we'd rather deal with misplaced anger and frustrations than actually face the real causes of our annoyance. And James! I adored James in this. His character's very honest and I loved that about him. That part about saying that it was Lizzie's fault for acting not acting her age told a lot about his character I think.

And snort, sex hair. So many questionable thoughts in just two words. So perfect. *whistles*

No criticisms. I thought it this chapter was very polished and I'd be such a hypocrite if I'd tell you to watch your commas. I'm guilty about that myself. OMG and em dashes? I devour them for breakfast. Besides, comma abusers are fearless and sexy in my humble opinion. :P I did notice one line:

"Don't. It's someone's fault. If it's not yours, and it's not mine, then who's is it?" --> I think it should be 'whose' is it?

That's it, really. Your premise, of course, was absolutely delish and I cannot wait to read more about this and see where this will go. Now hurry up and post chapter two, you fooo...

*huggles x a hundred plus a dancing carrot and a cookie*

Author's Response: YAY FIRST! *throws confetti too* ;D

So, lemme write you a story right now.

Once upon a time, there was this young, innocent girl named Taylor. After a long and arduous day at school, she had decided to take a nap to rest her weary eyes. Instead of resting for the half hour she had intended, she slept for two hours and contemplating staying in bed until the morning.

Alas, thirst and hunger quickly took root and so, she climbed out of bed. While moaning and groaning, Taylor turned on her laptop and popped onto HPFF like she often does.

What she saw made her grab onto a chair to keep her standing. It was -that- good. And then, after regaining her sense, she died. Because some incredible person named Kristine just -blew- her mind away that she could hardly stand it!

The end. :D

gaaah, Tinny. You are so fantastically amazing for my ego! Thank youuu for your such kind words. ♥ Let's hope I won't go over the character limit on these things... xD

That part of this chapter was probably my favourite (and I really don't like saying I have "favourite" bits of my writing because, well, it sounds weird? *dies*). But yeah, I'm actually quite proud of it and I'm glad that you liked it too! -flails- I'm actually having trouble responding appropriately to this review because it is JUST THAT AMAZING.

When I write, the things I simply adore more than anything else are the characters and the setting they're in. Oftentimes, I can just -see- them so clearly in my mind and I know who they are in a single instant. But then I get stuck on ironing out the kinks in plot and actually getting the words out... which is probably why I don't write as much as I should... but I digress.

*relieved sigh* You know, I was actually kind of worried about the Candice/Gemma thing. I was worried that it might have seemed like too much, because I don't have a sister and I wasn't sure if it was something 'different' than having a brother (who I could never shove around lolol). But also given the family dynamic, it was probably an appropriate reaction anyway.

In my mind, James is really quite mature emotionally. But of course, everyone messes up and makes mistakes - and he'll certainly be making his fair share of them. ;)

homg I seriously abuse commas and em dashes like CRAZY. But I love them. So much. *adoring face* I use them aaall the time. And I'm totally stealing that line and putting it in my siggy, mmkay? Mmkay.

Aaand you be right about that! Thank you for pointing that out. *dies* I always do that lololol I'll edit it once I get my banner to put in. :D

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU *tackles* ♥ ♥


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Review #2, by xtinjscTongue Tied: When Actions Can't Speak You Must Resort to Words

14th August 2011:
"I don't talk, you fool!" LOL I haven't mentioned this yet, but I find Calliope so sarcastically funny! Her inner monologue is so wonderful, and it's so great to see because in so many first person stories with female OC's, we get this young girl narrating her life with the most vapid thoughts, haha, and Calliope is just a breathe of fresh air! When both Remus and Calliope snort at Lilly, hahaha so funny how you wrote that! You really are such a talented writer with a brilliant understanding of how to manipulate words to give them the greatest effect, whether for a laugh or for a heartbreaking moment.

Giving Calliope astronomy as her favorite class seems so perfect for her! And no astronomy class scene with the Marauders would be complete without a little Sirius - Alpha Canis Majoris fun! Hehehe Again, you've taken something that's a bit over used in fan fiction where the Marauders are concerned, but you've made it so charming that I don't mind at all! ^_^ Nawww, I love that for the project Calliope wants to do jokes, not real offensive spells towards Remus. It's so sweet and makes perfect sense with her character! I think the little "You'd make a great teacher" line was really clever to throw in, because not only do we know that that career is actually in Remus' future, but you really do give him a great little method there to help Calliope out.

So sad when you brought Anna's death back into the picture as soon as Calliope starts enjoying herself again because she feels like it's bad of her to have fun without Anna alive. And it was so wonderful to see her channel all of her frustrations into one silent spell and really knock it out of the park! I mean, I thought the frustration with Remus was great, too, because I love seeing that she's imperfect and that she isn't hugely impressive right from the start with Remus, but that she has to grow on him first. Anyway, another great chapter!

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #3, by xtinjscTongue Tied: In Harmony with Melody

14th August 2011:
So I immediately love Melody! I think you've definitely created another fantastic character with her. And I adore the way she balances out Calliope. You've given her the ability to talk without needing to be answered, and to understand Calliope and her thoughts without ever hearing them expressed. The way you repeated the 'sad' bit from the previous chapter was so clever and probably when I really fell for Melody and her soon to be friendship with Calliope. Also, I don't think I could ever be a vegetarian, but the role fits her like a glove.

Sirius would forget that he sat with her on the train ride in, and then follow it up by butchering her name - twice! ^.^ I love the way you have all of the Marauders characterized. Sirius and Remus especially shine here. While I do think the whole getting paired with the guy you like for a project thing is cliche, I think you did it rather well. And I may have squee'd a bit at the idea of Calliope and Remus working so closely together. I'm just so completely on Calliope's side and so I want to see her get the guy, and I think that's the reason the cliche works here: because you've written her as so very likable! So yay! *throws confetti* ^_^ And I loved the tree scene! I thought it was really clever of you to have Remus almost seem insulted by Calliope's seemingly lack of interest in working with him on the project, and then how Melody immediately tries to repair the damage. All of the relationships that are developing are just so great! On to chapter 4!

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #4, by xtinjscTongue Tied: The Process of Loss

14th August 2011:
Oh no! I thought something might be up when Calliope's friend didn't make it to the train in chapter one... So sad. Yes, sad - just like Calliope says, where she takes away the big words and strips them down to there simplest core. There are so many moments in your writing where you write the gut punching sentences that just get me. It takes so much talent to consistently take a readers breathe away, but you have such a way with words that it continues to happen in this chapter.

I love that Calliope doesn't particularly like Lily. In so many fan fiction, we see Lily as this perfect person who everyone either adores or is jealous of. It's nice to see a character who feels neither way. Nawww, James. I love the line about how it wasn't indifference, but ignorance that kept any note of sympathy from his voice. And when you talk about Anna and Calliope and how close their friendship really was, considering there was so little speaking involved, it was just so bittersweet. And it's so terribly sad when she's at Anna's funeral and can't find a way to speak, but stays locked in by her silence. I'm surprised to feel a closeness to Anna when we never even meet her, when she's dead by chapter two. But the way Calliope's thoughts form for her friend, it really makes an impact when we find out she will never be shown in the story. And the ending was just simple, sad, and perfect. Another gorgeous, gorgeous chapter! ^_^

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #5, by xtinjscTongue Tied: Anatomy of a Hufflepuff

14th August 2011:
Oh wow... That chapter pic is stunning! I love Zoe Deschanel. But even that doesn't compare to the beauty of this first chapter! This story is such a lovely reflection on Hufflepuff House, and so accurate. I'm in the Hufflepuff House on the forums, and even though I chose to be there, we still know what other Houses think of us for being there. But you've painted the most beautiful picture of what it is like to be a Hufflepuff. Those first two paragraphs... just so gorgeous. I'm so glad to read a story in which our House is shown in the perfect balance of who other Houses think we are versus who we actually are. Thank you for that.

Outside of my adoration for your description of the House of Puff, the writing in this is so beautiful. I love the choice of first person, because already, Calliope is just my type of character. She's quiet and doesn't think much of herself, she embarrasses easily, but is very kind and gently and forgiving. I also love that she seems to be so forgettable, that she's been in classes with the Marauders for years, but they don't remember her. And he crush on Remus has got to be the cutest thing I've ever seen! I also love how she calls herself 'simple' and the way you elaborate on the idea. It's almost tragically beautiful the way Calliope thinks; the way you write her. The auto-immune disease is a really lovely touch, as well. The idea that she has a disease, but one that isn't deadly or hugely dramatic, and it already seems to fit her personality flawlessly. This was just such a brilliant opening chapter and I cannot wait to read the next!

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #6, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: Daddy

14th August 2011:
Bawww. As a Daddy's girl I found this story very touching. Girls really have that special relationship with their fathers unlike anything in the world, and I liked that you featured that kind of love in here. Very nice. I enjoyed Ginny's reminisces, I think they were moving in their own simple way. And the ending was very nice, too, especially with how it tied in with the beginning of the story.

I wasn't quite fond of Ginny saying those lines out loud, though. I would've loved for them to remain in her thoughts, like silent pondering, but that's probably just me. I just found the scene odd for some reason. There were a couple of punctuation misses that I noticed, but overall, it was a sweet and poignant little piece. Very nice.

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #7, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: There She Goes

14th August 2011:
Ron and Harry advising anyone to ask a girl out was oddity in so many levels. Teehee. I couldn't help but think that Fred and George would have been more suited for the job, but then that would be more chaotic, wouldn't it? :P

I've always thought the way Harry described Wood's Quidditch fanaticism could be a bit of an exaggeration, so I was glad to read about him being interested in girls in here. I think how he fumbled his way through it was adorable. And the fact that Leanne was a Slytherin was quite nifty as well. Overall, I thought you did a good job with this story, so yay!

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #8, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: Nothing Changes

14th August 2011:
I must say, I've read quite a lot of versions of the same story already and this was actually the first time that I've read Lily being present when James, Sirius and Peter confronted Remus about his being a werewolf. Hmmm. I couldn't say I was quite convinced of that scenario, though.

But setting that aside, I thought this was a very touching piece. I quite like how you began the story, with Remus keeping to himself as a little boy. It was quite heartbreaking to imagine him thinking that he'd be better off death. :S The ending was quite powerful, too. I always like it when authors end their stories with powerful one-liners. Very nice. It was an interesting read overall. :)

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #9, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: Playing Pretend

14th August 2011:
You know, this really is amazing testament of how unexpectedly some of our simple and thoughtless actions could affect other people. This fic was poignant and touching. You've tapped into that more vulnerable side of Luna and written her quite well here, so kudos for that.

The last two lines stood out to me the most because in so many ways, it's really something that all fan fiction writers could understand, isn't it? I absolutely adored the simplicity of this story. Great job! I enjoyed reading this. :)

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #10, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: Fade Into The Rain

14th August 2011:
Reading any kind of departure is always bittersweet. I couldn't say I was fully happy for Andromeda in this one, because turning back on your family must be one of the hardest thing in the world.

This story was quite touching, thought I would've loved to see a little bit more emotions in her sister's reactions. I was actually a little surprised that Bella reacted quite calmly. The only hint that she was opposed to her sister's leaving was this beautiful line:

"You'll taint the line."

That in itself might held all of Bella's anguish and disapproval, and that's quite nifty. I guess I was just looking for a bit more expression from her, is all. Overall, this was an interesting and very well-written piece. I'm glad I read it.

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #11, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: A New Beginning

14th August 2011:
This awfully cute as marshmallow rainbows. :P What I enjoyed the most in this story was how everyone kept interrupting everyone else. I thought they were all hilarious. I was laughing as I was reading about Harry feeling indignant that Ron forgot they were best friends, too... or that bit about Trevor under Seamus' bed... or Ginny hexing everyone... too funny!

I've never been quite taken with the idea about a graduation ceremony in Hogwarts, so I wasn't too fond of the setting. You might want to check your punctuations in your dialogues next time as they seem to end in periods when they're supposed to be commas. This story was just full of positive energy, though, that it really didn't bother me very much. I absolutely enjoyed reading this. Thank you very much for making me laugh! :)

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #12, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: Coming To My Senses

14th August 2011:
I found this highly amusing in so many levels. First of all, nobody ever writes about a teenage Augusta Longbottom, so this was absolutely refreshing and intriguing for me. Second of all, a teenage McGonagall that was quite the little gossip? Win. :D

I saw flashes of old Augusta's pride and stubbornness in here and I liked that very much. That bit when she just shrugged the news of a cheating boyfriend off was really something I would expect her to do for some reason. She's always come off as a strong and bullheaded character in the book for me, and I was glad that you managed to keep those character traits intact even if you've written her as a teenager. Very nice.

This story is my kind of fluff. Hahaha! It's not sickeningly corny, but the sweetness is definitely present. It was an absolute joy to read this. Great job!

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #13, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: Hidden Behind A Lens

14th August 2011:
I... wow. It was heartbreaking for me to read this. Colin's death had been one of the most surprising one in Deathly Hallows, though it's quite sad that not many people attempt to write it in fan fiction. It was really quite an experience for me to read this.

I liked the little background you provided in the beginning about Colin and his grandfather. I thought that offered a very believable and touching explanation of why he loved taking pictures so much.

Pictures mean memories.

That was a very simple yet very striking line. Very nice.

The ending was simply painful to read. It was frustrating why he had to sneak out to join the battle that day. The last line was quite chilling and I loved it. That's the way to end a story! You must give your reader something to remember, something that will stay with them, and that line was definitely memorable. Nice job!

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #14, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: Under The Surface

14th August 2011:
What stood out to me the most was this line:

In a mildly masochistic way, he was glad she'd picked Potter.

I thought it was interesting for Snape to admit something like that. He'd always been someone who absolutely hated James Potter, hated James with every fiber of his being, so I couldn't quite grasp the idea of him thinking James would be good for Lily at all. That line was rather curious and it definitely made me think - that's always a good thing. I like stories that challenges me to rethink things. :)

I wasn't quite fond of the liberal use of dashes to cut the sentences in the middle, because they rendered the flow of the sentences to be a little choppy, but that's more of a personal preference than anything. This piece was an interesting read for me overall.

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #15, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: Gone Without A Trace

14th August 2011:
Eeek! This was quite heartbreaking, isn't it? The ending gave me goosebumps and I wasn't quite sure if I enjoyed Sirius' leaving in the end. It seemed like a very selfish thing for him to do and I could not help but feel sorry for his brother. :S

It was interesting to see the brothers' interaction here, because they still seemed rather close even when the conversation was strange and awkward. I can't say I'm quite fond of how Regulus was portrayed here, though. He seemed a little spiteful and bitter for my taste, but he must have been so rattled and terrified at the time and that's something I could understand. The letter at the end was really chilling. And tragic! We all know what would happen next. Poor Regulus. This was an interesting little piece overall. Nice job!

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #16, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: The Beginning

14th August 2011:
I adored this story. The beginning was nifty, especially how it suggested that Tom's arrival at Hogwarts was just as ordinary as everyone else's, that he was just a typical First Year once - nervous, unsure and terrified. Tom seemed rather vulnerable here and I enjoyed seeing a different, more human side of him for once.

That bit about him keeping mental tabs of the other student's personalities, trying to guess which House would he belong to, was a clever insight to his character. Voldemort had always been smart and calculating and it was nice to see that he was also all that even as a boy. Very nice! This was a very well-written and thoughtful piece. Definitely enjoyed reading this.

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #17, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: Werewolf

14th August 2011:
Bawww. What I liked most about this was how in your dialogue, you've managed to keep each of the Marauders' personalities spot on. Very nice. For example, that part when Sirius said something about Remus being a werewolf as something cool and his plan of setting Remus on Snape? I thought that was funny and definitely something that Sirius Black would say. They boys' interaction was believable and very easy and natural as well and that's what I'm always looking for in a Marauder story. Very nice.

I did, however, notice that there were quite a lot of punctuation misses here, especially in the dialogues. And I would've loved for the revelation to be a bit more complicated than having Remus admit it to them right away that he was indeed a werewolf, but that's just a personal preference. I've always imagined that it would be a but of a struggle for James, Sirius and Peter to get the truth out of Remus, is all. Overall, this was a sweet little piece, so thank you for writing this!

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #18, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: Gone

14th August 2011:
I thought the first line of this story has Cho Chang written all over it. To me she'd really be that type of girl that would call her boyfriend my love. :P I thought you've written her well, the emotions were definitely there. This was a little too brief for my taste, though, and I would've loved to see her feelings and her anguish explored a bit more. Cho's a very emotional character, so I guess I was just looking for more of that here. Overall, this piece was rather well-written, so kudos for that!

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #19, by xtinjscPhoenix in the Ashes: Two Hearts

14th August 2011:
Short and emotive - that's my impression about this story. I thought you've managed to portray Dean's agony rather well. I liked the detail about the shattered glass, I thought that was nifty. In Half-Blood Prince, Dean was indeed seen holding a broken glass, so I liked that you added that bit in here. Some of the metaphors here were beautiful and quite clever. There were times, though, that I just felt that the tone of this story sounded a little too feminine for him, but that's probably just me. This was an interesting read for me overall.

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #20, by xtinjscRegretting Remus Lupin: Regretting Remus Lupin

10th August 2011:
Oh, wow... this was a little bit awful for me, because I've always believed that Tonks and Remus' love was genuine. But you did plead your case rather well in this story, especially when she was rationalizing why she was attracted to him, how she thought they would both understand how it felt to be an outcast. It made sense, though I still felt sad when she said it.

The ending was really heartbreaking. Their deaths had always been one of the most painful for me and I always just appeased myself into thinking that at least they died together, that they found each other, fell in love and was happy for a while before they passed away. But if Tonks really was regretting all that... it broke my heart. :S

Overall, though, this was such an interesting and though-provoking piece, so good job!

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

Author's Response: Thank you, I really wanted to give a different and surprising view of their relationship, and i'm glad I succeeded!

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Review #21, by xtinjscUnspeakable: Unspeakable

10th August 2011:
Wow, you had some really striking and powerful lines in here. I was really impressed with how well you've wielded your words together. The first few sentences really drew the readers in, and that's how you really want to start your story, isn't it? It really is horrible to keep a secret.

I liked the air of mystery to it. We didn't know who the main character was, who Reese was, or what they did or how horrible it was... we only knew Albus Potter was there and that he'd come as a knight in shining armour for the main character. Normally, I would've asked for more background or more details, but that would really ruin the mystery of this story, would it?

One of my favourite lines would have to be: Every day is a hurricane. Every night is a storm. Every hour is a year of paranoia. Every minute is long, drawn out. And every second of knowing adds up. Really powerful.

It was a joy to read this.. Great job!

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #22, by xtinjscHogsmeade in Autumn: Hogsmeade in Autumn

10th August 2011:
What I liked most about this story was how poignant and believable James and Lily's interaction was. I did think the fireworks just to cheer Lily up was a little bit unusual, but the thing that stood out to me really was her connection with James in this story. I thought you showed us just how well they complemented each other without making it overly fluffy or awkward.

I thought that bit about James remembering something that Lily said from way back was really sweet. I like how simple the moment was, and yet the romance was still there. Very nice.

The one thing that bothered me the most about this fic, though, was how you misspelled the word Hogsmeade. You wrote it as 'Hogsmede' even in your title, which really distracted me. You might want to edit that up when you have the time! But overall, I enjoyed this piece. Good job!

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

Author's Response: I've finally gotten around to changing it! Thank you so much for the review, it means so much to me that you liked the story!

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Review #23, by xtinjscWorth Trying For: Everything

10th August 2011:
This really could be anyone, no? I did like the fact that the main characters and her parents remained nameless the whole way through to the end. It gave the story a somewhat universal feel to it. And the emotions here were all very raw and present that it wasn't hard to relate and feel for the character. The first paragraph stood out to me the most, though, as it offered a really interesting take on unconditional love. You're writing is very clean and expressive, btw. Overall, this was a very well-written and touching piece and I really enjoyed reading it. Thank you! :)

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

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Review #24, by xtinjscGrand Finale: Grand Finale

10th August 2011:
Your beginning sentence was captivating. There was something about your writing style that kept me interested as I was reading. It was almost poetic, not to mention emotive. I think this story featured Ginny in her most vulnerable and thoughtful moments, and I liked seeing her in that state. It was refreshing.

I enjoyed that you kept the fireworks theme all throughout the story. It made everything connected. I also liked how you matched one colour to Ginny's emotions - that was nifty. I guess my favourite would have to be this: At the greens, she thinks about the evils upon them. She thinks of the lives already lost in battle, of the forces against good growing every minute, of the uncertainty of every moment.

This was a very touching and clever little piece and I was glad I read it. Great job!

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

Author's Response: Thanks so much! This was such a nice review; I'm glad you liked my story!

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Review #25, by xtinjscHugo's Big Day: The Wedding

10th August 2011:
Nawww, too fluffy! You know, out of all the Next Gen kids, Hugo Weasley had somehow been the least popular for some reason, that's why I was rather excited when I first saw this story. And I think you've managed to set up the wedding scene pretty well.

I liked the little slip up near the end, it added something different to the story and it also made it more realistic. Weddings are almost always portrayed like something out of a story book, but in reality, weddings are not that perfect, really. I was glad that you added that little twist.

It was a quick and fun read for me overall.

xtinjsc (Hufflepuff)

Author's Response: Thank you for reviewing! I'm glad you were excited that my story had Hugo in it, and I'm glad you thing I've set up the scene pretty well. In order to make it the ultimate wedding, I thought I would put in a catastrophe, because, as you said, not all weddings are perfect. I really appreciate that my story was fun for you to read! :D

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