Reading Reviews From Member: kaileena_sands
  
133 Reviews Found

Review #1, by kaileena_sandsAll That's Beautiful Drifts Away: i. The Animagi

15th January 2012:
Hi there! Coming here from the Ravenclaw review battle.

Firstly, I must admit I've been wanting to read this story ever since Susan did that wonderful banner of yours. I also love the title you've chosen from the Yeat's poem - I think it fits your story beautifully (though for now, I've not come to the point of the "drifts away" part, but I am sure we'll get to that in the next chapters).

Anyway, now to a bit more un-rambly review (I cannot seem to get the hang of those xD). I think you have a great way of expressing yourself, and the language you use is very fitting - it's very well-written without being too heavy on description or using pompous words just for the sake of being them there. Indeed, I read the whole chapter in one breathe. Smooth!

Your characterization is even better if possible! I especially loved how you described Peter, he's usually left so... flat(?!) in fanfiction. But here, we just see the insecure boy, who's disappointed that life dealt him a short hand again (with being a rat Animagus and all). He can not find worth in himself, so he can only get it from external sources - his friends (and idols) James and Sirius.

The glimpses into Remus' character were also great! I find it very logical that he would suspect his friends were up to something, after all by all accounts he was quiet smart and should have noticed something was off. But he, too, having such low self-esteem immediately thinks his friends are up to something.

So, I really liked this story - it's got everything you could wish for from a fanfic - it's well-written, intriguing and stays true to the spirit of the books. I will definitely read the next chapters, though I am afraid, I am smelling a tear-inducing and grim ending.

Thanks for writing such a great piece! :)

Author's Response: Heh, Susan's banner is definitely well-known, I think. She's fantastic. Yeats has been a HUGE inspiration for me in a lot of my fics, and his words just fit perfectly. You will definitely see the whole "drifts away" part in the last chapter.

Thank you for the compliments on my writing. I've been writing for a while so I guess I sort of fall into a rhythm while I'm writing. I'm glad it works well for you. :)

Peter is definitely a difficult character to portray in fanfiction, and one that many authors choose to ignore. I adore all the Marauders so I could never do that. Peter has always been a complex character that I try to write as rounded as possible - because no one likes a flat character. James and Sirius are great friends to encourage him and prove his worth.

It's sad that Remus would assume that, but true. He's dealt with a lot in his young years with being a werewolf and struggling to fight against being a monster, so having them avoid him is like his biggest fear. Good thing that's not the case. ;)

I'm really happy you're enjoying it. Yes, the ending is rather sad but we all know it's coming so hopefully it will prepare you well.

Thank you for leaving me such a wonderful, thoughtful review. :)


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Review #2, by kaileena_sandsBroccoli: A name

14th November 2011:
Wow, I really enjoyed this first chapter! I remember reading your "Hope" fic (which was beautiful) and now I am absolutely sure that it wasn't a fluke that you could give such wonderful insights into a characters. It's just talent. But yes, on this point, I love Eloise. It once again amazes me how you can make me care so much about your OC in one chapter. I love it how much sadness she carries in her, yet she is still hopeful and doesn't give up. Because it's so easy to be strong when you are (or at least feel) pretty and confident, but when you're small and people step on you, it's hard.

Oh, and I just love the tooth gap flow you gave it to her! To tell you the truth, I think it looks lovely on some people (like Anna Paquin from True blood and as a matter of fact that's how I'll be imagining Eloise from now on xD ). Your descriptions are also excellent and contributed much to the overall atmosphere. I cannot wait to see how exactly the broccoli thing incorporates into the whole fic and how she got the name.

Anyway, as I told you, I love how this fic begins and I am adding it to my favs. Don't you dare abandon it now! :P

Best
Maya

Author's Response: Oh wow. This lovely review just made my day. Such kind words! Thank you! :) I'm so happy that you liked it.

I'm glad you liked Eloise. It's easy to like her, feel pity towards her, I know, because she has such a sad disposition. :)

Hehe. I was inspired to add the tooth gap thing by one of my RL friend's looks, actually. I agree, it looks lovely on some people (my friend included)! But sadly, Eloise is not one of them. Thanks! I'm glad you found the descriptions good, because that's one thing I struggle with. The next chapter explains the broccoli thing, promise. ;)

I'm not abandoning it, swear! I'm so happy you want to read on! I hope you'll like the rest of the fic as well. :)

Thank you for such an amazing review. :D


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Review #3, by kaileena_sandsNever Mix Drinking and Apparating: Learning the Hard Way

10th November 2011:
Ahahah, that was really a lovely and extremely fun story! I actually read first the hpff version (loved it too) but I definitely don't regret reading this one too, I chuckled throughout the whole of it! (many congrats btw)

There are really many entertaining moments in this, I don't think I can quote them all. Definitely loved drunk Sluggie (it's how I imagine him xD ) and the chicken dancing! I can also totally imagine Draco dancing awkwardly (with possibly) a whole bunch of adoring fangirls around him. It's quite good that Kayla stocked on photos at the end, so that they could have definite proof of this quite surrealistic party. xD

Well... I really enjoyed this one-shot! And I'll probably have the vision of chicken-dancing Sluggy for weeks in my head now. xD It seems that you have a real knack for humour going on, so continue writing fun stories!

Best
~Maya

Author's Response: Thanks a lot! The complements means a lot to me! Yes, chicken dancing Sluggie is hard to get out of your head :3 hehehe. That means I did my job :D

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Review #4, by kaileena_sandsShe Has The World: She Had the World

27th September 2011:
OH. MY. GOD. This story was absolutely amazing! I am like super flattered that my CI (for once) is on top of such a great story!

So I have to tell you. I rarely get surprised when I read something. I think I've almost forgotten the feeling. BUT THIS? I totally did not expect this plot twist even though you hinted it so well! So really clever! I love it!

And everything is written so well. I love the colour symbolism throught the story and how despite Teddy's great attention to detail he was so blinded by his love for Victoire that he never noticed her materialistic ways.

So, all in all, amazing story! I think that the greatest aspect of it might be the great connection you made between the reader and Teddy. You've built up the story in a standard way and the reader, just as Teddy eventually, expects Victoire to marry him in the end. And when he realizes her ways, he gets as much of an emotional slap as the reader. Brilliant! I think I a fav-ing this.

Author's Response: I'm flattered to have your CI at the top of my chapter! And I get an amazing review on top of that :D

I am SO SO glad I was able to surprise you! I completely agree that stories are getting so predictable these days, and I always strive to be original somehow. So yay, I surprised Maya! Thank you for the comment on colors too. I was hoping people would pick up on that! Eep, your review has made my week. Thank you so much for liking this! It means the world that you read and reviewed!
-Naida


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Review #5, by kaileena_sandsPure Poetry: My Charlie

22nd September 2011:
Oh gosh, this story was so so beautiful! I must admit, I've seen your story Ranny around the recently updated stories and I've always wanted to read it (your beautiful language in the description drew me) but I just don't have time now to read anything non one-shot-y. :( So I was super excited to go to your author's page and see that you have this amazing little gem somewhere on top of it!

I don't like it too much when stories have this great description that the story just doesn't live up to. But yours... it not only lives up to, it exceeds it by a factor of bazzillion (not a word xD). You have such a beautiful way with words! You've got those amazing descriptions and comparisons and your narrative flows so softly and gently! I'd really like to praise you a bit more on it, but unfortunately, unlike you, I am not that good with words, so I'll just leave you with this - you are a great writer.

And apart from that, you've constructed such a wonderful OC! I know it's hard to present a character in just one chapter but you've done a wonderful job! We get a good grasp of her internal world and turmoils and she sticks with you. I like her!

Anyway, I could to ramble on forever. Lovely story! Keep writing great things, I'll be sure to return to read your longer works when I have the time. :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I have been so busy lately and I logged on and saw this absolutely lovely review and honestly, I'm smiling so much that I can't put it in to words.
I'm glad that the description of Ranny has drawn you in, and it's okay that you haven't read it - time is something that seems to escape everyone at this time of the year :)
I don't write many one-shots but whe I do, they're usually over-loaded with description and heavily dramatic ;) but I'm glad that you enjoyed this.
You're very sweet, and I'm very flattered, so thank you :)
If you do decide to come back and read more of my work, I would be very grateful, and I hope that you enjoy anything that you do read! Thank you again, and I hope that it lives up to your expectations! :)


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Review #6, by kaileena_sandsThe Most Evil Mind of Lysander Scamander: Chapter 1 - My Most Evil Mind

15th September 2011:
Ahaha, I absolutely love this! I don't know if you've watched that blog but Lysander so reminds me of Dr. Horrible! It's as if I am imagining him when I read this (and this is good, since Dr. Horrible is absolutely hilarious!)

Anyway, this story really is a breath of fresh air! We so rarely get to read from a male perspective (let alone one so preposterous and crazy!) so I totally enjoyed reading Lysander's ramblings. It's so ironic that he wants to be the evil one while Scorpius is the good guy!

I also loved the language and phrasing you used for his monologue! Such (unnecessarily for a teenager) elevated language really suited his (comic) villain persona. It must have been hard to write, but you did greatly! Anyway, thanks for the great read, I intend to favour and continue it! I really appreciate such nice original stories :)

Author's Response: Ooohhh I haven't watched that, but I will! Thank you so much, I'm really glad you liked it =). I tried to make it unique and stuff, which wasn't actually that hard since I am completely insane :). Thanks again for the lovely review! =)

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Review #7, by kaileena_sandsHope: Hope

14th September 2011:
Oh god, this is such a beautiful one-shot! I came here for the review battle and I picked it, but I think I'll now have to read your full other story!

It's just so lovely and sad at the same time. You made me instantly connect with Lisa and feel for her. It must be so so sad for her to watch the person one loves being so unbelievably in love with someone else like James was with Lily. :(

Your writing suited the feeling of the story really well, too - it gives out both melancholy and at times the short phrases give out Lisa's feelings and excitement. And the quotes you picked for the fic suit it greatly too - I've never heard the one about hope being a universal liar and it fits Lisa's situation perfectly! Poor thing indeed!

All in all, I thoroughly enjoyed this! From this short one-shot, you really made me like Lisa and I'll definitely return to read the rest of her story in your other fic.

Author's Response: Aww...thank you! I'm glad you found it so! :)

Yes, it's incredibly sad- and let me let you on in a little secret (sort of). I wrote this when I myself was feeling very melancholy; so it all came out quite easily. I'm a very melodramatic person and the fic suited my mood :P

I stumbled upon that quote, and found it perfect for the story! Glad you thought so too!


Thanks, thanks, thanks for the lovely review! It seriously made my day! I'm sincerely glad you enjoyed it! :)


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Review #8, by kaileena_sandsRaining: 'Train Ride', Seventh Year.

4th September 2011:
Omg, this was so so cute! It is a fact that there are two kinds of fluff - one is the boring, overdone and make-you-throw-up one. And then there is the second kind. The well-written one that makes you happy and warm and snuggly.

Yours is the second kind, of course. The best actually. :) With one chapter only, you made me like both Amelie and James and made me want to read more about their story. I really love it how they are so sweet and how they are friends instead of the banter, let's perform shout-out matches kind of characters.

I will definitely come back to this story at a later point to finish it though my reading periods have been a bit on and off lately. But I really want to learn what happens with Amelie and James and read Sunshine too then. Great story, goes to favs!

P.S. It was so funny when Amelie commented on the annoying snuggly couple and then James kissed her and she liked it (of course). So ironic. xD

Author's Response: Aah! Really? Re-reading early chapters of Raining really does make me want to throw up - considering an edit/rewrite when I finish a couple of my other WIPS! Glad to know you like it though!

I love writing about James and Amelie, although it is difficult to have 'character development' (although you can sort of be a little lenient with that sort of stuff with fluff fics) when the plot jumps around from time to time.

My reading schedule has been blown to pieces thanks to school and stuff, but at least with the Dobbies and the TGS awards I have an excuse to do some!

Thanks for the great review! :D


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Review #9, by kaileena_sandsThe Chosen Boy: Desperation & Violation

8th May 2011:
Ohhh, I really like how this story starts out! Naturally, since it's a prologue we aren't given that much info, but you managed to get me curious about how it's going to continue. I like your style of writing and I think that the strongest thing about this fic is how well you've captured Sirius and Neville's characters. I felt as if they just came out of the book and there were nice small details (like how Sirius said that the world has seen enough of the Cruciatus curse) that really gave flesh and bones to the narrative.

So, all in all, job well done! I'd like to see how this fanfiction continues. :) Good luck with it!

Author's Response: FIRST REVIEW!!!

I appreciate your comments and am pleased to see that of my research and painstaking time in getting Sirius and Neville right was evident in the finished work. There's 5 more chapters in this thing that was supposed to only be one (they take off like that sometimes, don't they).

Thanks so much for your kind words.


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Review #10, by kaileena_sandsImpenetrable: The Mission

5th May 2011:
Oh my god, I haven't reviewed anything in such a long time! I hope that I haven't forgotten how to do it. xD

You know, I have always been very fascinated with Tom Riddle stories. They have that dangerous appeal, but in my opinion are really really hard to write plausibly! Up to now, you've written everything well, though, effectively outlining Tom's only (and very fervent) interest with the CoS. Amaya seems interesting too and I am glad that you didn't do the cliche "from a long line of Slytherins but sorted in Gryffindor". Yes, there was some thought on it from the Sorting hat, but indeed old habits die hard. It's important how her character will develop from now on though - that we get an insight into the real her and not just leave her a two-dimensional character with an obsession with Tom Riddle. I guess I'll see that in the future chapters. ;)

Anyway, all in all, a good beginning of the story. You write very well and you made me care for your characters which in my opinion is a crucial thing in all stories. I enjoyed it and I will be back. xD

Maya

Author's Response: Yay, thank you so much! I think I'll be able to develop her a bit more, but thanks for the advice and the review!

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Review #11, by kaileena_sandsSomething Old, Something New, Something Blue.: Anemones.

23rd February 2011:
That was totally gorgeous writing! I loved the smooth flow of the story, the torrent of emotions in Victoire and the whole premise! The repetition of the eyes - "those eyes that werenít nor green nor brown nor grey nor blue." is very haunting. It almost sounded like an echo from a song in my head. Beautiful!

And I actually quite enjoyed your premise that she didn't end up with Teddy - almost no one ends up together with their high school sweethearts in real life. Teddy sounded like a wonderful man but he just didn't have that gripping quality of Lysander that haunted Victoire. Ah! I also love the meaning and symbolism of the anemones - very well done!

10/10, this was an amazing one-shot. :) I am glad we swapped. *goes to favourites*

Author's Response: hey? really? gorgeous? well thanks so much! - my face: :D :D :D You know, actually, my mum has those eyes, i cant really tell what color they are even though she uses green. I say they are blue, but she does not listen. although it does seem like a song :)

yeah, i think it needed some sort of twist as I have never really read any story of Victoire ending up with anyone that was not Teddy, although here she didn't really end up with Lysander, but walked out on Teddy in their wedding to follow her heart. He certainly was great, but for Victoire, consciously or unconsciously, it was always Lysander. And I actually had to search the meaning of flowers to find one that fit :D and anemones are purple. yay!

10/10? eeep! thank thank thank you so much for the review and for loving it and for favouriting :D :D :D :D


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Review #12, by kaileena_sandsThe Human Factor : The One Where It All Begins

23rd February 2011:
Uh, wow? That was ridiculously funny! How dare you be that funny! I was smiling like a madwoman throughout the whole chapter. You have a very interesting kind of snappish (I don't know how else to describe it) humour - a bit like in a situational comedy! A very good one, though. :)

Pippa is such a lovely girl (love that name) - accepts chocolate bunnies for bribe and gets fooled easily. :DD And drools after Albus' smile. :D Wonderful! And OMG! Stalkerish Lily. :D I cannot wait to see more of that. And I'll definitely see, since I am adding this to my favs. Congrats, it's really hard for me someone to hook me to a story from the first chapter, but you did it! Your writing is excellent and you manage to give sufficient insight into your characters with few well-chosen words. :)

If you didn't get it from the above, I love it. Tomorrow when I wake up, I am on to chapter 2, since I cannot wait to see what disasters shall occur in poor Pippa's life. :))

Author's Response: Hi! I'm so glad you think that! Really? I'm so glad you thought it was funny! I'm so glad you like my humour! No one's ever really made a comment on that before. So thanks :) I like my humour too. Haha.

I'm so glad you like Pippa & her name. Haha. I'm glad you like Lily too, she features later in the story. I'm so happy you're adding this to your favs, that means a lot to me. And wow! Really! You're so kind. This has made me smile so much!

Thanks! I'm so glad you liked this chapter & I hope you'll enjoy chapter two aswell.


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Review #13, by kaileena_sandsHow I met your father: How I met your Father

21st February 2011:
Aw! That was so sweet! When I read your title I was like - whaa? I love that show. xD

And I love your story too - how Molly attempted (and failed) to tell the story in third person to Ginny in order to be more dramatic. :DD Poor Molly, not gathering lots of attention! But she got Arthur in the end. :) Your interpretation of how they met and fell in love was really sweet. And good that you placed little bits and details from canon to make the story more fleshed out - like how Molly was listening to Celestina Warback and knitting! Details like this are important!

All in all, totally enjoyable piece. I am glad we swapped reviews. :)

Author's Response: Thank you!

I am so happy you really liked it! I am also glad we swapped :D


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Review #14, by kaileena_sandsHelp Wanted: Clandestine Food Shopping Can Cause Problems

20th February 2011:
Gah! There really isn't anything like a good ol' gender bender. You love K-dramas, huh? Me, too, though I favour J-dramas a bit more. And we know they love their gender benders!

Anyway, on the story! It's such a good start, you managed to instantly pull me into it! And that's considering that I don't feel that invested in OC-only stories. But this is go-o-od. David seems like an interesting character (for the bit that we've seen) and I can just feels the future lols from the situation ensuing. Speaking of lols, you've got awesome humour. I swear, that bit about the floss that was actually hair made me laugh out loud. xD Epic fail on her part. :DD

And your writing is lovely, too. There isn't anything to complain really. I just love that moment when Frankie is about to tell David's mother she is not a boy and he stops her thinking that she's going to say she isn't dating him! That always happens in Asian dramas! And I love it!

I'll favour this and I hope that you update soon. I am glad I picked this story to review. :))

Author's Response: Good ole jdramas. I haven't really watched that many so I must say that I love my kdramas mostly because I have more experience with them.

OC stories need more love! Well, well-written OC stories, which I hope this will end up being at some point, haha. David is such a ... I don't even know. We see more of him in the next chapter and it's a bit of a different side, so I'll be interested to see if people still like him after that, haha.

And yes! SUCH an Asian drama moment. There will probably be lots and lots of those in the future, so I hope you're prepared, haha.

Thanks so much for your review!
Annie


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Review #15, by kaileena_sandsPotter's Got It Bad: Potter's Got It Bad

20th February 2011:
Wow! Good that the review swap made me come here, I really really like your idea of showing us the three generations of Potters together! :)

Characterisation - I think that you are spot on all three of them. I like your interpretation of James I and how he was beginning to both love and hate Lily for the feelings she brought in him. You've got a natural flare for descriptions - "Her flashing green eyes, her hair coming free from the ponytail that had whipped around her head as she had strode towards him and her delicate features, contorted with anger made her simultaneously more beautiful, and more repulsive than James had thought possible." Chilling!

Harry on the other hand is very much the boy with the hero complex we know from the books - excellent work! I cannot write him if my life depended on it. James II I think is a good approximation of what a Potter born in time of peace could turn out. I like that all hope on him is not lost yet. xD

And speaking of hope - I love love love your idea of uniting the three Potters under the same theme - their hopefulness about the future. The repeat of the phrase you use is powerful!

Excellent one-shot, good work. :)

Author's Response: Oh my god, really? What an amazing review! Chilling?? Wow! *tries to compose herself*

You really got what I wanted to come accross with all three characters, I was so worried about that! The poor boys really do have it bad, despite the song is angsty I had to give them some hope! I plan to write more on all three pairings, maybe a one shot about this form each of the girls points of view?

Anyway, I'm so glad we did this swap too! What a lovely review to read just before bed, I'll have such a happy sleep now :L


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Review #16, by kaileena_sandsStating My Independence: Stating my Independence

15th February 2011:
Hey there! Here for the review battle. :)

A friend of mine got me recently into Dramiones so I thought that this prologue was a good place to start for when I read the complete story. :)

I quite like your characterisation of Draco. I always like to think that all those horrors he had lived through had managed to change and soften his view of the world. I think your descriptions of the emotions he goes through are perfect! :) As for Lucius and Narcissa they are also well done - the loving mother and the stern father who cannot quite yet let go of the beliefs he had carried his whole life.

I particularly liked your idea how the Malfoys tried to distance themselves from the wizarding world. A lot of writers forget the consequences that being a former Death Eater would be and I am glad that you mentioned it. I think it's more realistic this way. Your writing is very good, too. It's engaging and definitely makes me want to read the whole story. And when I have more time, I certainly will. Well done! :)

Best,
Harley

Author's Response: Hi. Thanks so much for your review. I'm glad you like my characterisation of Draco. I wanted to believe that he was changing in the last book and that is what I tried to capture in this story. He had a hard life, growing up in Lucius' shadow and this is his journey to be someone other than Lucius' son, .

I'm really happy you enjoyed it and I hope the rest of the story doesn't disappoint.


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Review #17, by kaileena_sandsThe Greatest Rewards: The Greatest Rewards

15th February 2011:
Awww, is this the end? I would like to know how this continues!

Anyways, thank you for entering my challenge! I like the story you've written quite a lot.

I think the strongest point of it is your writing style. You really use language beautifully which makes your descriptions of both atmosphere and emotions very powerful. I also like your characterisations of Percy's daughters - I think it's quite possible that they are brought up in such a stern posh way that he deems correct. Your introduction of your OC Darren is also well-executed. In the beginning, we get just a bit about him and he even seems a bit like a fishy character. Later, though, we discover that it is Molly's own uptight and ambitious self that had put an end to their relationship. I also like how despite her apparent strong ambition, she is also kind of vulnerable inside, as illustrated by her inability to tell him about the baby.

As for the quote - I like its placement! I certainly can imagine Lucy saying a thing like this! Thanks for writing such a great thing!

Best,
Harley

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing!

Yes, this is the end, I wanted it to be ambiguous.

I'm glad that you like both the writing style and the quote placement.

And thank you for posting such an inspiring challenge!


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Review #18, by kaileena_sandsOnce Upon a Dream: Once Upon a Dream

15th February 2011:
Hey there! I am finally here with reviews for my challenge. RL, you annoying horrible thing!

Anyway. I adore this story. Let me say this with a few points.
Characterisation - I think that both Ted and Andromeda are spot on considering what we know about them. Ted - the gentle muggleborn who has a playful streak in his character that allows him to catch the attention of a pureblood. Andromeda - the other "out of place" Black, who nevertheless possesses some snarky traits of a Slytherin. I like their subtle descriptions throughout the story very much.

Plot - considering also your Remus/Sirius story, I think you have a great talent at describing a secret kind of forbidden romance. Their subtle, kind of hushed yet bubbling passionately below the surface romance during their Hogwarts time is perfect.

Finally - the quote. I really liked how you used it and how Andromeda retorted to it sarcastically. Truly in the tone of House. Well done!

As a whole, a great great story. First Ted/Andromeda to go in my favourites! :))

Best,
Maya

Author's Response: I hate when RL gets in the way of fanfiction. :( Keeps me from reading as well. *shakes fist*

So so so glad that you like the way I painted the characters. Their characterization scared me since we didn't know much about them. :D

Ah forbidden and hidden is the most entertaining of all romance. Lol. Thank you again!!

*blushes* You're too kind, thank you! --Jenna


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Review #19, by kaileena_sandsOf Tears and Laughter: Of Tears and Laughter

14th February 2011:
Awww! I always get sad when reading about George being left alone. :(

It was excellently written and I like your take on the subject, though. :) I quite like your line about how he has denied himself the chance to grieve. Hermione is rubbing on Ron indeed. :) You've tackled both their characterisations really well and you've described grief perfectly, without becoming excessively dramatic. Wonderful! 10/10

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing, hun ^^

I'm glad you thought I wrote this well :) The grief part was the bit I was most worried about. :) xx


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Review #20, by kaileena_sandsOn My Own: On My Own

9th February 2011:
Wow! It's rare to find a good song fic! :) I love it. The way you characterise Ginny and describe her emotions is absolutely beautiful! And the song also fits perfectly with the moment, it adds to the character growth that Ginny experiences so well.

What I also like very much are your descriptions in the story - they add to the somehow melancholy and are wonderful without becoming over-the-top or flat. I also love the premise of Ginny having created her imaginary world. It was sad, yet hauntingly beautiful. :)

All in all, wonderful one-shot!

Author's Response: Thanks so much for the lovely review. It was the first fic I wrote and I still like reading over it every so often. I'm really glad you enjoyed it so much.

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Review #21, by kaileena_sandsBad Habits...: I'm going to save you Charlie...

8th February 2011:
It's good that in this chapter we learn a bit more about Charlotte and her past. :) I also liked her interaction with Remus, it was a strong point of the chapter.

Now, just another suggestion - you often switch tenses in your story - past to present when writing. You should pay attention to that when editing since it's distracting. :) Otherwise, I think that your story is going really well. Keep writing!

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Review #22, by kaileena_sandsBad Habits...: Hell at your Heels

8th February 2011:
Hey! So sorry for the terrible delay in this reviews. :( Anyways, here I go. Since I already told you about spelling mistakes, let me talk about a few more things here.

I really like Charlotte. Up to now she seems like a wonderful well-rounded character. :)

The plot is also entertaining and keeps the reader interested. On the downside, I think that a problem you may run into is cliches. You kind of use a lot of them in this chapter - Sirius being paired with the OC, the nasty girl in the girls dormitory. While this is not bad per se, I think it would be good to try to stay away from using a lot of them in order to distinguish your story from the others. :)

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Review #23, by kaileena_sandsUnrequited : Unrequited

7th February 2011:
Wow, I am a bit freaked out by the synchronisation of our brain waves - I wrote a one-shot for the mother and you wrote a one-shot for the daughter. Lol. :D

Anyway. I think your story is very haunting. I love the way you showed how Helena couldn't bear to wear the diadem. Also, how she relished in her spite till the very end. It's very difficult to describe such an ugly flawed human being and you've done it perfectly. And the ending sentence - perfect on both a literal and symbolic level. Awesomely amazing one-shot. 10/10

Author's Response: 10/10! *blushes* You flatter me! XD

I saw your one-shot about Rowena and my jaw dropped. Definite twin brain wave action going on. Yay for the Ravenclaw girls!

:)


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Review #24, by kaileena_sandsSecond Hand Ticking: Second Hand Ticking

29th January 2011:
Hey, I just saw your "promo" on the forums and I decided to come and check out your story. And good that I did! This is an excellent one-shot!

I really like how you handled the whole situation. It was original and I find your characterisation of Rose, Scorpius and the adults very good. I also think that the reactions of Hermione and Ron are spot on.

Another good thing - your writing is excellent. All in all, great fic. Good luck on the challenge, I think your chances for winning are great!

Best,
Harley

Author's Response: Ahh, thank you for coming by and leaving a review! =) Hehe, I'm glad that little promo worked. XD Seriously, though, thanks so much for your compliments, made my night!

Thank you, thank you, thank you!


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Review #25, by kaileena_sandsThe Sorting of Albus Severus Potter: The Sorting of Albus Severus Potter

29th January 2011:
Hiya! This one-shot was adorable. :)) I really like the idea how you based the one-shot around the sorting of Albus. And the way you wrote it certainly makes sense why he was put in Gryffindor. :))

Scorpius and Rose were also adorable. I like the contrast between Scorp and his father - that he was a quiet one, reading his book alone, because no one liked the Malfoy family anymore. I am a fan of stories where Scorpius is very different from his father, because in my mind that's how it is. xD

Otherwise, it was generally well-written and enjoyable. I am glad I came to read it because of the (uh... snowball) fight. Cheers! :)

P.S. Almost forgot - I love the bits with mean James. xD He made me smile like crazy.

Author's Response: Hi! Thanks for reviewing! :)

I'm glad you liked my choices for the characters personalities. I don't think Scorpius should be like his father at all. I'd like to think that after the war, relationships between families improved. :)

I think James acted in a typical big brother way - winding his brother up all the time :D

Thanks again! I'm loving the so-called snowball fight at the moment :P

Sophia x


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