Reading Reviews From Member: FrostyFannie
  
46 Reviews Found

Review #26, by FrostyFannieThe Beauty in Ordinary Things: Extraordinaire.

26th April 2011:
Hi! So, since you reviewed my story, I just HAD to return the favor.

So. Um. Well, I was preparing to pretend to be nice, and be all fake and say 'I loved this story!' even though it was actually awful.

But, OMG, it isn't! I found it really sweet, with all the 'extraordinary' and the 'not wanting to be beautiful' things. I've always envied the beautiful people, but because of your story I've sort of learned that their are pros and cons to being beautiful too!

Great story. 10/10. Nuff said.

Author's Response: lol! :D :D :D i totally know what you meant, i sometimes do that too *guilty* but there's nothing we can do! some stories are just AWFUL. but im glad you liked mine! :D

 Report Review

Review #27, by FrostyFanniePretty Boy: Juice-y

25th April 2011:
Great story! Just so you know, the time you spent with your enlightening male friends has helped a lot.

 Report Review

Review #28, by FrostyFannieTwo Pairs of Hearts: Two Shorties, Strawberry Cake, and Filch.

6th April 2011:
I like your story, a lot. The idea is plenty good, and if you keep writing like this, this could be a REALLY REALLY AWESOME story.


Though it would have been a lot better if you didn't put so much spaces: it made me dizzy. Well, that's maybe because it's midnight and I'm dying to sleep, but it would really be better because I bet there are others still on the computer at midnight, who would appreciate less spaces.

You could also maybe add more characters? It gets a little boring with only Ari and Caridee and Georgina talking. I'm 90% sure you'll enjoy writing conversations with more people in it: it's always fun to write the random bickering and the stupid statements. You'll also have more room to spread out.

I'm sorry if I bored you with this long review. Anyway, love your story!!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! You should get some sleep! :) I'll trry to work out the spaces, it's probably my computer or something. :/ And the story will progress more

Thanks again. :)


 Report Review

Review #29, by FrostyFannieThe Time of Cupids: Mental Insanity and Towers of... Hickeys?

6th April 2011:
Awesome. I do NOT know what you did, but I could actually FEEL Victoria's sadness, FEEL James' guilt. And of course, feel hate for Amelie.

Keep writing! :)

 Report Review

Review #30, by FrostyFannieFind Your Love: This is Not Funny

5th April 2011:
While you did this to improve writing, this was also a really good read! Please don't forget about this story.

Hope you have writers block a lot!
But then again, you'll have a hard time writing Breathless, which I, by the way, love.

Sorry. Bottom line: I LIKE, LIKE YOUR STORY.

 Report Review

Review #31, by FrostyFannieDéjà Vu: Parchment Textures, More Visions and Decisions (Hey, That Rhymed!)

5th April 2011:
Awesome! As you think that this chapter was awful, hopefully you will write another one, in say, a few minutes? No pressure, though.

While your writing is awesome (as always) you could have described the way she fell into unconsciousness (Seeingness, whatever) a lot better, but in YOUR style of writing.

Still awesome, whatever happens! Love your story!!!

 Report Review

Review #32, by FrostyFannieBreathless: Disaster.

29th March 2011:
Thank you (insert sarcastic eye-roll). My brother now believes me to be insane as he just caught me laughing at a computer. Thank you.

But no, seriously! Your writing really made me laugh, and I didn't have to try to keep reading. Awesome read.

 Report Review

Review #33, by FrostyFannieWe Gryffies: A Snog, An Imagination Journal, & A Chanting Mob

21st March 2011:
I LOLed so hard at the girl journal part, with the sexy crisp white pages and all!! This story is getting addicting!

 Report Review

Review #34, by FrostyFannieWe Gryffies: The Numerous and Constantly Multiplying Weasley Clan

21st March 2011:
Well, I can't say your story was the most realistic. But it's REALLY enjoyable to read, and it really lightened up my dull mood.

P.S. Consider my rating of 9 a 9.5!

 Report Review

Review #35, by FrostyFannieCinderella: Cinderella

17th March 2011:
I'll start with the good things about your story:

You've got a really good grip on your plot! Also, the way you revealed that the Prince was Sirius was cool.

Bad things:

You've got issues with tense, for example: 'When his mask is off I gasped'. IS is present tense, so therefore the rest should also be present tense, so GASP, not GASPED. You should decide in what tense you're telling the story.

Also, you have some really long sentences that you could have chopped up into better, shorter sentences. I heard somewhere it helps with pacing.

Which brings me to pacing: after only a few sentences, you already let your heroine fall hard for Sirius. It comes off as irrational (is that the right spelling?), so the reader isn't really inclined to root for this couple.

That aside, I think you really have potential, and you just need to, you know, get more comfortable with writing.

P.S. I am writing as one who reviews stories, not a fellow writer who considers herself above you. I do try to follow my own advice, but please DON'T take it against me if I am an awful writer.

 Report Review

Review #36, by FrostyFannieToo Good To Be: The Beginning

25th December 2010:
He I really like your 'beginning of forever' line! Though I think you should have elaborated more on their first make-love. But otherwise, you write really good!

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I would've I just was hesitant on how I would wirte it haha

 Report Review

Review #37, by FrostyFannieThe Other "Talk": A Father's Wisdom

25th December 2010:
I really like your humor! And also the way you made Lily's and Jacob's relationship, and how he realized he loved Lily. You're good!

 Report Review

Review #38, by FrostyFanniePast Lives: Past Lives

21st December 2010:
You're actually pretty good for a first story! If you hadn't said you were new, I would have thought you were a fan fiction buff. Though you should really make this longer. Maybe you could put some weird adventures, if you're more on the adventure genre, or you could write about how Lily and James met, if you're more of a romance writer. It all depends on you. Your writing is really good and people would really like to be able to read more of it.

Author's Response: Thank you for the review. I'm glad you like my story. It's so short because I didn't know what to write. Maybe with your suggestions I will add on to it or add another chapter or something.

 Report Review

Review #39, by FrostyFannieStill Delicate: Turning Tables

15th December 2010:
Hi! I reviewed on this chapter because I already reviewed on the last one, and anyway I only have a message.

Well, I don't know if you're the kind of writer who has moods, like you want to write then the next hour you don't. I don't know too if you're the kind that does stories when you have to. I'm not really sure. But if you're the second kind, and you can be told to hurry up, please, I am telling you to HURRY UP! I have been checking this story for awhile now waiting for the next chapter, and you know. Please, for the love of Scorpius! :)

 Report Review

Review #40, by FrostyFannieA Muggle Like You: We Don't Even Know Each Other!

14th December 2010:
Dun dun dun.
What could possibly be the reason for Zoey falling?
To the review proper:

You are getting better and better at spelling! Well, I don't know really, because I hardly notice anymore, I'm so engrossed in the story.

That was a really good bit about Zoey watching Titanic a hundred times! May I repeat, I love Titanic. MWAH!

P.S. Just in case you're a boy I'm sorry. The MWAH was just a random word to show how much I appreciate and love this story. MWAH!

 Report Review

Review #41, by FrostyFannieA Muggle Like You: Never Let Go

14th December 2010:
Okay, this might not be a proper review, but I have to say that I LOVE HOW YOU PUT ROSE DAWSON AND JACK DAWSON IN IT! I'm a big fan of the movie, seriously. When I saw the words 'Rose Dawson' and 'Jack Dawson' and 'Titanic', my heart felt like it had dropped into my stomach! Not a metaphor, seriously!

Author's Response: I was taking a glance at my reviews to try and get back into the swing of writing again. Thank you so much for the support! Your reviews are very helpful.

 Report Review

Review #42, by FrostyFannieA Muggle Like You: Bar Talk

14th December 2010:
Like what I said in my first review, technicalities are the only things you should improve on. Therefore I am pointing out one error:

squeeled is actually squealed

I checked in Encarta Dictionaries and squeel isn't there. Plus, I've never encountered it.

Anyway, I wish you all the best and hope you're well on your way to becoming the perfect writer you can be! :)

 Report Review

Review #43, by FrostyFannieA Muggle Like You: It's Not Stalking If She Knows You're There...Right?

14th December 2010:
Hi! Okay, your writing is perfect, except you should really be more on the look out for typographical errors. If you could just do that, and maybe improve your spelling (I don't know if you spell words wrong, or if they're just more typos), your writing would be perfect!

 Report Review

Review #44, by FrostyFanniePlaying Cupid: Time Travelings a "Piece of cake"

15th November 2010:
Weeek! You are the only story I have ever read in this generation, all my others are next generation stories or Voldy stories. I really like how you made Hermione less dorky and made her personality more defined! Rock on! :D

 Report Review

Review #45, by FrostyFannieCrime and Punishment: In The Art Of Discovery

1st November 2010:
I really like how you pit Charlie and James together! You're really setting the foundation for avoiding light, fairytale romance that will personally have freaked me out. You're right, though. The constant switching of the POVs confuses. So I suggest that you just switch POVs every chapter, because I really don't want you to drop the POV of James. It gives a different take on the story, and then afterwards you get to see their emotions evolve from hate to friendship, and, if that's what you're planning, love! But please don't do POVs of other characters besides Charlie and James. An author did it in this story I read and it really made me dizzy. Great writing!

Author's Response: Thank you! I agree, no more characters will have a POV, that would get WAY too complicated.
These first three chapters were sort of like a prologue to the story, and the next chapter will change :)
I'm glad you like my writing! Thanks for the review!


 Report Review

Review #46, by FrostyFannieStill Delicate: Slightly Deranged

1st November 2010:
Beautiful twist! The crazy James Potter into drugs! I mean, all of us, when we feel like insulting Jamesy we say "That boy has the potential to be a drug addict" but you took it past the big talk and walked the talk! I mean, wrote the talk.

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login

<Previous Page   Jump:     Next Page>