This is a lovely start to what seems like an interesting story! Your summary drew me in, and the chapters that you do have maintained that interest really well!
One thing I'd watch out for though, and something that I noticed mainly in your first chapter is that you tend to start the majority of your paragraphs with either 'Theo' or 'Theodore'. I find, and it may just be a personal opinion that it detracted from the flow of the story a bit and that perhaps you could have found another way to start paragraphs.
Overall though, it was definitely interesting, and I'll be keeping a look out for the next chapter!Author's Response: Thank you. I hope you enjoy and continue to read. :) Report Review
So, because of you and your absolute -amazingness-, I actually didn't for more than 4, very restless hours last night, because I had to read on your story, and then dream about things related to your story. If I wasn't so tired, and amazed with your skills, I may be a little annoyed.
Yeah, enough of my rant, I think you've done an absolutely amazing job of making characters that seem so realistic, but are so against headcannon of so many. Also, I'm torn between thinking Scorpius is an absolute creeper and going 'JUST GET WITH HIM ALREADY ROSIE'... there's obviously something wrong with me.
I am sincerely hoping that you'll be updating this soon!Author's Response: Wow, this is such an awesome review!! I'm sorry I interrupted your sleep and then made you dream about it - hopefully creepy Scorpius didn't feature too much! But honestly, this is a huge compliment :D
Thank you so much! Report Review
I've got to say that I absolutely love your story! The intrigue and mystery in it are just amazing, and the characterizations have been done beautifully!
The only thing I can think to point out is in your line "I didnít saw the three very frequently, but when I did I had nothing but good impressions.' " The saw should be see.
Other than that though, it was an amazing job and I'll be looking out for the next chapter!Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much! I've really enjoyed writing this - Teddy's such a comically dark character and the mystery & the murders are a really interesting storyline to follow.
Oooh, thank you for that error! I try and scour my writing as much as possible, so thanks ever so much for pointing that out. I might get some CIs done for this story when it's finished so I'll correct that then.
Thank you a thousand times for your lovely comments!
Bethan. xxx Report Review
I have to say, I've read this story through a few times now I love it that much and this is the first time I've caught up on that AVPM reference you sneaky thing you.
Love the story!Author's Response: HAHAHA. YES. I WAS WONDERING IF ANYONE WAS GOING TO CATCH THAT REFERENCE! i believe that you're the first :) thank you so much for the review! Report Review
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