Reading Reviews From Member: MuggleMaybe
40 Reviews Found

Review #1, by MuggleMaybeChai, Samosas, and a Friend in the Wee Hours of the Morning: Chai, Samosas, and a Surprise

2nd August 2015:
Happy Happy Birthday!

This story is SO SWEET! (Also, I really, really want a samosa now.)

Neville is one of my very favorite characters. Just the thought of him makes me smile. And you've written both him and Hannah so well.

Neville has more confidence here than I sometimes see, which I like. And I love that even though she wants to be alone, Hannah can't help but let him in.

You've done a good job keeping the reader grounded in a story with a lot of dialogue. That's no easy feat!

So, what I really disliked about this story: When it ended! I think I need to go read the 2nd one!

Wishing you a wonderful birthday!

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Review #2, by MuggleMaybeSpoons: spoons.

29th July 2015:
Hi Joanie,

Yeah, so, I really don't know what you were talking about in your very kind review of The Clock, because this is stupendous!

You've absolutely nailed the characterization of Molly and Arthur here. Especially Molly. Her dialogue sounds just like JKR wrote it!

I can't begin to imagine how the Weasleys are feeling in this moment. But they are still so loving and strong and I JUST LOVE MR. AND MRS. WEASLEY SO MUCH!!!

"It's not about the spoon" *SOBS*

"How is it possible to be this sad?" *I AM DROWNING IN A POOL OF MY OWN TEARS AT IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT*

I can't decide if this story made my day, or ruined it. Really beautifully done. :hug:

Author's Response: RENEE. You have made me smile this stupid, big smile, and I am in public. You are too kind.

"Her dialogue sounds just like JKR wrote it" Ok, I can die now. I want to be best friends with you.

I am so glad you liked it. But I like your story more!

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Review #3, by MuggleMaybeHow to Fix Your Sibling (The Art of Getting Even) : Chapter 2

27th July 2015:
Back for review #2!

AH, now that I have read both chapters, the pieces are starting to come together. I can't wait to see how the two girls get along. I thought that you wrote well together as a team - your styles are complementary, and I can see some similarities between the two MCs that will be useful in building their relationship.

I thought the argument against Hugo was very effective (although I was a little abashed, since I am also the baby out of all the cousins).

I'm not sure how to explain my thoughts about Rose. I simultaneously want to hug her and shake my finger at her. But I thought the cousins came down unnecessarily harsh - she deserves a little revenge! As does Teuila! (I feel like I'm spelling this wrong...)

Technically (grammar, etc.) this chapter was very good, so nice job there, as well.

All in all, the two chapters work really well together. I'm excited to see how the story lines interact in coming chapters!

Great work!!

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Review #4, by MuggleMaybeHow to Fix Your Sibling (The Art of Getting Even) : Chapter 1

27th July 2015:
Hi there, it's MuggleMaybe stopping by for the review swap :)

I love the way you opened the chapter - it definitely got a laugh from me, and caught my interest. Teuila has a snarky, sharp-witted voice that I enjoy. (I really want to quote a few of my favorite lines, but they aren't exactly 12+) She's definitely someone I'd rather not have as an enemy! I am interested to learn more about Teuila and her life. Good work!

It's awesome that you wrote a half Samoan character! Very interesting and refreshing. The tattoos really intrigued me - I would like more info about that!

I have to admit, I could have used a little more context. In particular, I found it a bit difficult to piece together the family tree. I know it can seem like cheating to bluntly state things, but I think it would be effective here to give the reader a few facts about the story. Especially since that would work well with Teuila's blunt attitude, anyway.

On to the next chapter! :)

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Review #5, by MuggleMaybeNot One Line: Don't You Dare

27th July 2015:

I AM CRYING. Why would you do this to your poor readers??? I know, I know, you apologized. you gave fair warning. But holy moly! So sad!

It's really lovely, though. I was a little confused about the gravestone at first, but the slow reveal of the situation makes the impact tremendous. It's very powerful this way. (I haven't read How I Met Your Father - YET - so I may have been a little out of the loop.)

The use of 2nd person is interesting. It made me feel like I was Rose, watching myself. You know, like with really strong memories you sometimes feel that way? This story seems like one Rose goes back to in her head a lot, and that's what we're hearing. Knowing that makes the scene more powerful, too, because we know she doesn't recover immediately. She hurts long enough to look back at it. (I'm making myself cry again just think about this, Lizzie, and I blame you!! ;))

My favorite lines in this story are:
"He looked good. Physically, at least. He was healthy, that much you could tell. Over his shoulder you could see a spotless flat, noting the absence of anything that had to do with you.

In contrast, you knew that you looked terrible. These days it took all of your effort to even shower, much less clean. You’d moved in with your parents last year, where everything reminded you of him."

This part is so honest, and so well captured. It made me ache on Rose's behalf.

By the way, I absolutely HAD to read this story for your birthday review, because ScoRose is my OTP, too. AND, "Back to December" is my favorite Taylor Swift song.

So, HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you. Here's to another year of your *beautifully* written stories!


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Review #6, by MuggleMaybeMuddied Lines: She Begins

26th July 2015:
Hi dear,

I saw your story posted on the forums, and since I love ScoRose I had to take a look :)

Since she is only a first year here, the romance element is very limited. Are you planning this whole novel to be about first year? Just curious, because I am writing a first year story about Lily Luna.

I found Rose's desire to be recognized as an individual very believable. I also liked that you gave her Hermione's looks. Red hair is lovely, but I always find it hard to believe all the next gen kids would have red hair. Plus, it works well symbolically.

The connection between Scorpius and Rose about wishing to have a different name, and escape from the pressure/stigma of their father's names, is a perfect starting point for their relationship. It leaves a lot of room for conflict, but also provides a shared understanding and a basis for trust.

There are some grammar mistakes here and there, but overall I thought the story was well written.

Keep going - I am interested to see where this is headed :)

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Review #7, by MuggleMaybeLord Banchory and Lady Ravenclaw: History Forgets

22nd July 2015:
Oooh, I quite liked this!

I've read almost nothing in the Founders era, but you really made it come to life. What's really impressive to me is that, even though the Bloody Baron's violent actions can never be justified, you managed to portray him in a sympathetic light. For all that he's a villain of sorts. He really seems to love her, while she seems very cold-hearted. There's just so much complexity here!

I may have to venture into Founders some more :)

Lovely work!

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Review #8, by MuggleMaybeWatching: Chapter 1

22nd July 2015:
Hi Kaitlin,

I know we already talked about this story, but I wanted to review it anyways.

I think it turned out really well!(No surprise there!) It is an incredibly difficult pairing, but your approach was brilliant. I love that you added a few details about what he noticed.

I think my favorite line is "all that was left was the rotting carcass of his love." It captures the piece perfectly.

Wonderful job tackling a very tough challenge!

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Review #9, by MuggleMaybecrying lightning: Prologue: yesterday // let's head over to tomorrow

21st July 2015:
Hey there!

I finally got to this story after our summary discussion in the forums (:

There are so many great humor stories about this era, and a lot of great angst stories, too - but I think the pervasive fear that would have arisen around the marauders is often overlooked. I can tell even from this short prologue that you plan to make that a central theme in your story, which I really respect.

The writing reads BEAUTIFULLY!
I love the one-two-three, etc motif you wove through this chapter.

I was a little confused about the parts in parenthesis. But that could just be me - I've had a long day ;)

Also, out of curiosity, is the "A-tishoo! A-tishoo!" part meant to be part of Ring Around the Rosy? If so, that's really interesting because the version I grew up with is different. :)

This was so intriguing and I absolutely can't wait to see what happens in Chapter One!!!

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Review #10, by MuggleMaybeTaming the Dragon Tamer: [six]

21st July 2015:
Hi Anja,

This is MuggleMaybe for the review swap :)

I almost didn't read this story. I've never read a fic about Charlie before. I never thought he had much to offer as a character. Well, let's just say, I have never been happier to be proved wrong!

You found so much depth in Charlie. Some of it you drew out from the books, building brilliantly on details. But you also show a lot of originality. He is superbly captured here.

Chris is an interesting and engaging
OC. He's insanely charismatic and I liked him immediately. I'm looking forward to getting to know him better and finding the complexities in his character.

You have a great collection of conflict scenarios all set to go. I can't wait to see how you use them!

This story is very well written and I'm excited to read the next chapter! Hats of you you!!


Author's Response: Hey Renee,

Thanks for the lovely review and sorry again for taking forever to leave yours.

I'm so glad that you liked this, this story is so important to me. and I'm incredibly happy that you saw Charlie's potential through my story. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH, he's such a great character to write for me. Chris is exactly what Charlie needs imo... they are pretty perfect for each other. I'm working on the next chapter and I hope I'll get it to my beta sometime this week so I can FINALLY update again!

Thanks for your kind words


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Review #11, by MuggleMaybeWhat's in a Name?: What's in a Name

20th July 2015:
Hi Ellie,

Finally made it over for the review swap - and I'm so glad I did!

I actually wanted to read this story anyway. I think I saw it in the challenge thread, and I was impressed by the direction you went with the quote. I never would have thought to use Draco, but it works PERFECTLY.

You have some great prose here. My 3 personal favorites:

1) It had taken him a long time indeed to figure out that by some people’s approximation he was a jumped-up snivelling little git.

2) It had taken the branded stinging burn of the Dark Mark into his young flesh to teach Draco that what’s in a name doesn’t necessarily reflect what’s in a person.

3) As he was asked to provide the names and associations of any and all people who’d in any way supported, followed or sympathised with Voldemort, Draco knew he would live up to his name.

I think that last one is especially important. As the story progresses, Draco seems to be rising up a moral high road as he gains insight on his name and his identity. It's cathartic to undergo that process with him, but it also gets a bit lofty. Just at the right moment, the mention of consequences like these brings us back to earth. He's still Draco,the Slytherin. He'll still sell another man's soul if it means keeping his own.

Structurally, it's really cool and interesting how the story circles around to end where it begins, with the idea that being a Malfoy is a good thing. You execute that cycle well, so by the end the same idea actually means something complete different, nearly the opposite of its original meaning.

I have a piece in the queue for this challenge right now... Eek! You are tough competition, girl! :D

Wonderfully done!

Author's Response: Hey Renee,

Thanks so much for swapping with me. I really enjoyed your story and I'd never been by your page before, so it was wonderful to come across a brilliant new author. Thanks so much for all those lovely things you said about my story. I was worried it might be a bit dull, so it's good to know you enjoyed it and found it realistic.


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Review #12, by MuggleMaybefirst: first kiss

20th July 2015:

I could tell you enjoyed writing this chapter, because there were a few more errors than usual in the grammar ;)

Also about grammar: I don't want you to think this review is anything other than adoring, because I have truly LOVED reading your story - I'm definitely adding it to my currently reading list! However I have noticed that grammar is sometimes tricky for you. If you ever need a quick beta for this story, let me know. I'm always happy to nitpick.

One line I especially liked was:
"Albus' gaze landed on her left hand as the glint of the diamond reached his eyes. His face was serious and sad as he spoke up, "That diamond does not suit you.”"
*lovely* and so much impact.

I ship Esbus... Alme... Albesme... ah, whatever, I SHIP THEM.

Keep writing, please please please!

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Review #13, by MuggleMaybefirst: first moment

20th July 2015:
I know I should be focusing on Esme, but first I have to say that I love how you wrote Lily! She's rather tactless, and that characterization works well because it foils Esme, who is decidedly cautious. Also, know that Al has mentioned Esme to his sister is a helpful hint for readers to understand his feelings, since Esme don't seem to understand them at all. Poor thing.So anyway. Lily Luna = success :)

I just realized some thing:
Making Esme French was a stroke of GENIUS on your part because, at least for me as a native English speaker, I'm able to see past some of her awkwardness because I simply blame it on the language barrier. (I work with adults who are learning English, and I have found that their words often have a larger impact than a native speakers, because they don't have enough vocab to say things in an indirect way.) It makes Esme's obvious discomfort seem almost charming. :)

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Review #14, by MuggleMaybefirst: first crush

20th July 2015:
Another very, very sweet chapter! My heart goes out to Esme, she does seem sad. I hope by the end she learns to be happy.

I love how by this time, Al is self-assured, while Esme is just beginning to grow into herself (and has quite a ways to go). They play off of each other in such a unique way.

Great job!

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Review #15, by MuggleMaybefirst: first meeting

20th July 2015:
Hi there! This is Renee, stopping by for our review swap :D

This is a very sweet first chapter. Or, maybe bittersweet is a more accurate way of putting it. Esme is rather sophisticated for an 11 year old, I think, but in a believable way. She seems wise beyond her years, somehow.

I was not expecting an age gap between Albus and the OC. Since they are only 4 years apart, it isn't creepy. It will, however, add some intrigue and complexity as their relationship changes over time.

Your Albus reads as compassionate, intelligent, and a bit of an outcast. Is that what you were going for? If so, I thought it worked well and enjoyed meeting him. If not, I still enjoyed meeting him, anyway.

You work in the French very nicely. I probably know even less French than Albus does, but I followed it easily.

Also, because I just HAVE to ask: Did you purposely give Albus blue eyes instead of green?

I liked this chapter a lot! Keep it up!

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Review #16, by MuggleMaybeRisk: Four

10th July 2015:
The plot thickens!
The mystery is moving along nicely! In this chapter, I really like how Molly interacts with her family. I particularly like your characterization of Ron.
I also thought the interviews were well done. I'm glad you had fun writing them!

There are a few things I hope I'll get to see more of in future chapters. I would like to see more of Molly's life outside of work, and her relationships. And, I would like to see an intense action scene.
Anyway, I'm sure the next chapter will be brilliant!

*adds to Currently Reading list*

Author's Response: Hi there!
I'm glad you like the pace of this story. I'm really trying to lay out things slowly, so you guys don't figure out who's behind everything!
I loved writing the scene with Ron and Hermione. I feel like they'd be great parents, so of course they'd be really great with their nieces and nephews, too.
The interviews were a hoot to write. I just loved coming up with Sophie and Bradley! They're stereotypical rich kids. Haha.
I want to talk more about Molly's life outside of her job, so I'll work on bringing more of that into future chapters.
Thank you so much for these reviews! And I'm thrilled that you're enjoying this story so much!
Cassie :)

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Review #17, by MuggleMaybeRisk: Three

10th July 2015:
Another excellent chapter!
Kiernan is an interesting character. He seems to leap of the page. Also, there seems to be something of a spark between him and Molly... ;) (Or maybe that's just wishful thinking?)

I am already desperate to know how the mystery ends. I want to stay up all night reading, but I can't with a WIP! Sadness!

Author's Response: Hello again!
I love writing Kiernan. He's just so upbeat, which I think is needed, since this story is about a serial killer. There's nothing between him and Molly, they're just really good friends.
I'm so glad you're already so invested in the story! Thank you for the review!
Cassie :)

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Review #18, by MuggleMaybeRisk: One

10th July 2015:
First of all, the opening to this chapter is genius! I like the idea of interweaving the narratives like that. However, it's a challenging approach to take as a writer. You execute it extraordinarily well! The language reads smoothly, and yet there are clearly two voices present. You wrote the scenes in a way that made them feel parallel. You also managed to get me immediately invested in the mystery. One element in writing mysteries is to find the right balance between the story within the crime and the story outside the crime, and you've done that expertly with this opening.

Molly's personality doesn't seem much like her father's. On the other hand, she comes across as intelligent, determined, and somewhat insecure. Those are definitely "Percy" traits! For me both of these things are positives. I don't want to read about a character like Percy, because frankly I find him annoying. But I still want Molly to be believable as his daughter, and she is.

Really enjoying it so far, and looking forward to chapter 2!

Author's Response: Hello!
I'm so glad you liked how I started this chapter! I've never written a mystery before, so I really wanted to start it off with a chapter chock-full of clues and things left open ended so the readers have questions and are intrigued. So it's a relief to hear that you liked the opening so much!
Molly really isn't that much like Percy. I think she mostly takes after her mother. But, like you said, she definitely has inherited some traits from her father, too!
Thank you so much for this review! It was so sweet!
Cassie :)

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Review #19, by MuggleMaybeYou Can Write The Book: it's all in the details

8th July 2015:
Hi Teh,

This story has been on my Reading List for ages, and since I can't sleep tonight I was lucky enough to read it at last. There isn't much I can say that hasn't already been said far more eloquently by someone else. But the quality of the story compels me to say what I can.

Your writing in this piece is true artistry. It doesn't read like words on a page (er... screen). It reads like.. oh, how to describe it? It reads like rain pouring down and drenching me in a story. That's the best I can do.

Also, it makes me want to go back to every piece I've ever written and make it powerful the way this story is powerful.

Sometimes when I read an especially awe-inspiring piece like this one, I wish it wasn't fanfiction. There are a lot of people out there who don't understand what we do at this site, and it's a crying shame for them when they're missing out on a gift like yours. But I suppose that makes your writing a lot like Colin's photographs, in a way, doesn't it?

Lovely in every way. And heart breaking.
~MuggleMaybe (Renee)

Author's Response: Hi Renee! ♥

I've got a whole heap of reviews to respond to, but I'm going to answer yours first because I simply cannot resist answering reviews for this particular story, which holds a very dear place in my heart.

I'm so honoured that this humble story of mine has been in your reading list! I wrote this story for myself and I honestly can't believe sometimes that it's had such wonderful, positive comments from reviewers.

Your compliments are amazing; thank you so so much. I don't really know what else to say, except this means so much to me, and your kind words have absolutely made my night.

Thank you for reading, for saying such beautiful things about my writing, for this review. ♥ ♥


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Review #20, by MuggleMaybePain Makes You Beautiful: Rated Mature for themes and content.

30th June 2015:
I found this via the Angst Challenge, and I can't believe it only had one review.


WolfStar is not my head cannon at all, but I think if it was, this is the version I would run with. What I love most about it is the clarity of intention for each character. They're confused, hurting, just trying to survive through the pain. And even when their actions were cruel, I could understand them. Everything felt inevitable - which is NOT the same as predictable. It felt like Sirius and Remus were both cornered into their choices by a combination of character and circumstance. I could feel Sirius losing control of his world. Beautiful writing.

Thanks for writing this - going to check out your other stories now! :)


Author's Response:

I'm so glad you found this through the Angst Challenge. I would never have written anything like this if it weren't for that. I don't usually write this way, not this raw and unbridled. I'm so relieved that you felt the inevitable pull, that things came together, and it wasn't predictable at the same time.

I don't know what else on my Author's Page can compare to this, I just don't. The closest thing I can think of is my Severus Snape novel, Until We Close Our Eyes For Good, which I needed lots of cuddly kittens after writing, so you might like that. Otherwise, this is quite unique writing for me. I doubt I could write this way all the time, even if I tried.

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!


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Review #21, by MuggleMaybeLove Rules: Love Rule #26

8th April 2015:
OHMIGODNESS! Here I've been looking back on this story for over a year, and yet I somehow failed to see this until today! (In typical fashion, I discovered it when I should have been sleeping.)

Congrats and thank you for sticking with the story and finishing it even though I'm sure your life has moved on to other exciting things now! Your Scorpius will always be my head canon, I think. *swoon*

Keep writing!

- MM

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Review #22, by MuggleMaybeWe Are Who We Are : It Started With a Toilet Seat

29th July 2014:
You are too nice to me!! Scorpius/Rose fluff! Yay!! I really liked it :) I especially love the way you write Rose. I think I said this in an earlier review, but it's such a different interpretation from what I usually see, and I think it's just perfect. Honestly, I would love to see a longer piece with this Rose as the main character. You know... if you're looking for ideas... ;)
I'm looking forward to Lily Luna - I'm also writing her, so it's interesting to see what other writers do.

Author's Response: Rose comes so easy to me so I'm glad you like her! I find it so hard to imagine a daughter of Ron Weasley being Hermioneish haha. I've been toying with the idea of a longer story about her, she's just so fun!

I haven't started on LL yet, but she'll be coming soon! Trying to figure out what kind of adventures she'll get in to is harder than I expected!

Thank you so much for reviewing!! I love hearing from you :)

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Review #23, by MuggleMaybeCareful What You Wish For: St Mungo's

27th July 2014:
I really don't know what Dani's last wish will be. But I can't wait to find out! Favorite character... Probably Oliver. And I quite like Angus, as well. Least favorite... Penny? I don't know. I like them all!

I love Dani and Oliver together!

Author's Response: Knowing Dani, her last wish could be absolutely anything at all! And how could Oliver not be your favourite? Haha! He's so much fun to write - he was always one of my favourite parts of the first three original HP books, and I couldn't help writing a story that involved him heavily!

Thanks for the review!


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Review #24, by MuggleMaybeCareful What You Wish For: The Third Wish

23rd June 2014:
Great chapter, as always!

Dani just loves to make trouble doesn't she? At least this time she feels so bad, I'm sure she will learn her lesson. Penny and Angus are the most loyal friends I've ever heard of - I am pretty calm and I would be FURIOUS at Dani if I were them. Especially Angus. She is very lucky to have them!
Hmm... come to think of it, maybe they are the most DISloyal friends, if you think of it from Kat's POV. Though, in Dani's defense, Kat was rather unbearable.

Anyway, sorry for the ramblings. Just had to tell you to keep up the good work! :) The plot to this story is so engaging. I look forward to some more Oliver/Dani romance soon!

Author's Response: Thank you so much!

She really, really does. And she gets herself into all kinds of completely unnecessary problems because of it! And your definitely right about Penny and Angus being loyal. Between Dami and Kat they have to put up with a lot!

I'm so glad you're enjoying the story! I'll look forward to hearing more from you. Thanks so much for reviewing!


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Review #25, by MuggleMaybeSeven: Stags and Secrets

17th May 2014:
You are bad for my sleep schedule! I should not be awake right now, but I stupidly started this story at 11 pm and I. CANNOT. STOP. READING.

Why can't I stop? Because Marauder fluff is the stuff of life!

This chapter was so sweet and satisfying. I like that your Lily is more daring and straightforward than I usually see her. I like that you made Peter decent looking (even though he doesn't deserve it). I REALLY like the way you write James.

Ok, I am going to stop now because I am just fangirling all over the place and it is kind of humiliating.

We all have our weaknesses, don't we ;)

On to chapter 9!

Author's Response: right on!!

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