Reading Reviews From Member: MuggleMaybe
216 Reviews Found

Review #1, by MuggleMaybeIcarus: 2032: A Parallel Universe Odyssey

13th January 2017:
Transferred from AO3:

WHY AM I ONLY JUST NOW READING THIS FIC? And also, hello dear! *hug*

I am a bum and get really intimidated when I aim to review every chapter, so I'm ashamed to say I've waited until I was all caught up to review. (Just to be clear though, I read this in one night. It's 4:30am but I could.not.stop.)

I should probably try to write an actual review, since I've cheated you out of reviews on chapters 1-11, but I don't think I can do a true, thoughtful, composed sort review because, ahem, I LOVE THIS FIC SO MUCH OMG AND I CAN'T BE SENSIBLE WHEN I'M SHOUTY AND FULL OF LOVE FOR YOUR WRITING. Ugh, Kristin! You are SO GOOD. Every time I read something by you I am utterly blown away.

Things I Love About This Fic:

- Lily Luna. People don't write her all that often, and it's a shame. I really love how you've written her. She's smart and interesting and compassionate, but also insecure and rash; she so wonderfully human and it's beautiful. You get inside her head super well with the narration, too. Maybe I"m projecting a little here - it's very possible - but i get a strong sense that Lily tries to act like everything is fine for her, but really she isn't very happy or comfortable with herself or her life. For example, in her observation that time in the alternate universe has made her more assertive about making friends, I could see in her a lack of confidence and growth toward better confidence and I love that. You really set this up super well, because her life at home is kind of crappy - unemployment stinks, she's single and feels lonely about it, and now she'll need a new flatmate. (I also need a new flatmate. I wonder if Lily would have me? ;)) And that gives her sci-fi adventure so much punch because even though she messed up, it's clear why she *needed* to do this (not to her, perhaps, but to me), and the adventure isn't only a great adventure - it's a chance for growth. I think genre fiction misses that sometimes and I'm happy you haven't. It makes this story really rewarding to read.



- For lack of a better word, it's simply really, really interesting. My personal head cannon is that the Big Conflict of the Next Gen era is the statute of secrecy, so I am biased in favor of this alternate universe idea. The way you lay out the recent history in the alt. universe is very clever. I think you're right on target in the implication that magic and technology can accomplish a lot more when paired together rather than isolated from each other. That said, I never would have imagined the idea for this fic, with space travel and other planets. It's so original and absolutely fascinating to read about. And the plot has me constantly on the edge of my seat. (I repeat: It is 4:30am. Could.Not.Stop.)

- Marta and Lance are both utterly captivating OCs. I adore Lance, and Marta is unpredictable. I think all stories need a good, solid, unpredictable someone in the mix. =) Generally, I enjoy all the OCs in this story, but those two are the big stand outs so far. (I suspect I will love some of the crew members, but I've only really had one chapter with them so I'm reserving judgement.)

- This is often quite funny. Unsurprisingly, since you are hilarious. (I love the puns. Never abandon the puns.)

- I like the pacing. I confess, at the beginning I was surprised we didn't get to the "sci-fi part" more quickly, and I felt a bit impatient. However, now that we're in the sci-fi part, I'm really glad you gave me some time to meet and understand Lily and her word and the people in her life, before things got crazy. Without that foundation, the rest of the story would not be nearly as engaging. I think you made a wise choice to focus on character first.

- i'm very very tired now and surely forgot important awesome things, so just in case: I like all the things about this story!

Things I Do Not Love About This Fic:

- lack of additional chapters

This story is very nearly as brilliant as you are, my dear, and that's saying a LOT.

Much love,

Author's Response: Okay, I have no idea how to respond to this in a coherent way so we're even. I couldn't respond at the time I read it or it would literally have just been keyboard smash and probably a bunch of hearts. Also, for the record, please don't feel badly about not reviewing every chapter. I think everyone is that way when faced with a longer fic, haha. And the fact that you read this right through to 4.30 in the morning and left this INCREDIBLE review more than makes up for any additional reviews. Really, I couldn't ask for anything else. This review is everything. ♥


- Lily Luna: yeah! It's actually kind of weird that she's not that commonly written about. I mean, objectively she should be just as interesting as Rose, but everyone writes about Rose. *shrugs* One of the great mysteries of our time. Anyway, I'm so glad you like my interpretation of Lily! And I really love your analysis of her character. In fact you pointed out things that I think I had been writing subconsciously but had never had it stated obviously to me like that, but you're totally right. I think Lily does act like things are fine when she's really not, after all she is used to having an unwanted spotlight on her and that must have shaped her character. I'm actually so glad you pointed that out because I don't think I ever directly stated anything of the sort so I'm really glad that the vibe I'm trying to get across without saying anything has actually translated to the page. And yes! Adventure stories and personal growth go hand in hand, and I'm thrilled you like that aspect of it! And the fact that you said it was rewarding to read - gah! Thank you!!

- I think I can count on one hand the number of well known science fiction stories/movies/books that have a female as the primary protagonist. (Basically just the new Star Wars, and Alien.) ... And that's kind of sad. There should be more. And so I've been intentionally filling this character cast with important, powerful women of all different backgrounds :P Though what's sort of ended up happening with this fic, now that I look back at it, is that almost every important character in this fic is female (or at least not male). Maybe it's a bit skewed, but I feel justified when you compare it to the casts of characters in a lot of classic sci fi which is often like 95% males, mostly white, and with no lgbt representation at all. Also, with LGBT representation in popular culture, it often seems the character gets kind of defined only by their sexuality, which doesn't make for very well rounded characters, so here I really wanted to just normalize that aspect of Lily. It's an important part of who she is, but it doesn't define her, because she's also clever and insecure and everything you listed there in your comment.

(So as you've probably figured out, this story is also kind of my platform for making Statements through my writing :P )

Yay! I'm SO glad that you find the story and the alternate world interesting. I know the premise is kind of out-there, and I always wonder what people think when they dive into it, haha. As a scientist myself, I was really intrigued by the idea of how science and magic would intersect in a world where they actually could do so. It's also really great to hear that you like the pacing and the plot- I feel like these are things I've struggled with in previous writing so this is such a wonderful thing to hear.

Ah! And I'm so glad you like the OC's! And even my wacky sense of humour.


P.S. If Lily was real, I'm sure she'd love to be your flatmate, as long as you don't leave out bowls of noodles for a month :P

*HUGS* *SQUISHES* Now go get some sleep :P

 Report Review

Review #2, by MuggleMaybeIf Only in His Dreams: Winter's Solstice

22nd December 2016:
[cross posted review]

Hi Alexis!

I thought I would stop by and read one of your stories. Now, I confess, I am not usually a Snape fan. That being said, you definitely managed to make me feel for him with your writing.

It's pretty heartbreaking to think of Severus as a boy, in love, dancing with Lily as a gift to her - which is such a sweet and earnest thing to do and ugh. I can't stand it. It's so sad.

You clearly take great care in choosing your words, and this reads beautifully. I think it's musical, in a way. I also really like the details you've included, like saving the thorns for potion-making, and the decriptions of the different plants. Also, the way you set the timeline using that brief remark about Draco was super clever!

To be honest, I have decided on quantity over quality in terms of my reviews for the moment, so I will leave it at that =P

Thank you for writing this softer side of Snape. I enjoyed it.

xoxo Renee

 Report Review

Review #3, by MuggleMaybeStorm: Broken Dreams

3rd December 2016:
JILL! Hello dear! ♥

First of all, I apologize that this is a bit late. Eep.

Second of all, if I'd known this was going to be so sad I wouldn't--

No, I'm just kidding. (DEFINITELY kidding!) It is very sad of course, but sad can be good. In this case, sad is moving and compassionate and desperate and so very Harry-like.

I've only read a little of your Ginny/Seamus writing although it's a ship I find interesting. It's cool that you decided to look at it through Harry's eyes here.

I think what breaks my heart the most in this story is Harry's need to escape from the Burrow, which has always been this safe-haven for him. With the war over, he deserves to feel safe and at peace, but he doesn't and I find it very believable but also devastating.

And he visits James' and Lily's graves. Oh my poor heart. The things he said... I really hope the rest of this story has him arriving at a happier place because *sobs*

One thing I really like is the parallel between Harry's determination to try again with Ginny, and what we know was James' determination to win over Lily. It's like the Potter men just have to go for the one who got away, and I love that echo.

You pack SO much emotion into this short one-shot chapter, and I found Harry very in character, even though I wish he didn't have to feel this way. Brilliant job, as usual.

My semester will be over soon, and I definitely hope to catch up on a lot of fic during my break. Starting with this story (and a box of tissues, because jeez)!

xoxo Renee

Author's Response: Eep, Renee! HAI! ♥

I'm so glad you thought it was Harry-like. As you probably know, he's not a character I write often because I find him to be very difficult so I'm glad you thought he was in character here.

Yeah, I figured the Weasleys would be very smothering, and especially after the Senny stuff, I could see him using a break so I'm glad that you could, too, even without reading everything else. ♥

You know, I didn't even notice that parallel, but you're totally right! Those Potter boys and their determination :P

Thank you so much for the lovely review! And also, I miss you and hope to see you around more. Good luck with the end of your semester!!


 Report Review

Review #4, by MuggleMaybeWaltz: Waltz

27th August 2016:
♥♥ TANYA ♥♥

I am THE WORST. Why am I THE WORST? Well, for one thing, I am so horrendously late with your gift tag gift, it's absolutely shameful. And, for another thing, I favorited this story about a year ago and never left a review! TSK.

So, anyway, I hope you can forgive my transgressions long enough to read this review, because I really really REALLY love this story!

Your words are just... GAH! It's a work of ART, Tanya! ♥

The repetition works so brilliantly to convey Rose's experience, and I felt you captured OCD really REALLY well. A close family member of mine has it, and that tension between the guilt of inconveniencing others and *needing* to comply with the compulsion is so real and familiar to me. I've seen that. Also, the inability to explain why something that seems meaningless is so important. I wanted to hug Rose so bad during the opening scene.

It's such a different take on Scorose than I've EVER seen elsewhere, and it's really moving and sweet how they normalize things for each other.

And then. AND THEN. The mistletoe. Bless Scorpius, he comes through for her doesn't he? There is so much care and affection between them, but also all this tension because they are, individually, carrying so much tension.

Then the end, the last line. So beautiful. I can't say enough good things about this story, honestly. It takes my breath away. ♥

10/10 without question.

Much love!

 Report Review

Review #5, by MuggleMaybePurge and Dowse, Ltd.: Welcome to Janus Thickey

21st August 2016:

I couldn't let the day go by without leaving you a birthday review! Only, it seems I've missed the mark because this is such a cool story, it feels more like a gift for me than a gift for you. :P

I absolutely LOVE the premise! I've never seen this done before. You always have the most original ideas.

It's fun to meet some OCs. Miriam seems like a force to be reckoned with. She's very East Coast in my head, I'm not sure why, but I love that she has a strong presence. And I love that she's giving Felicity a chance :)

Felicity reads like the MC in this chapter, but according to your note that's not really the case. Still, if she was the MC I'd be happy about it. First of all, she's a Puff. YAY! She's sort of anxious and persevering at the same time and that's a really interesting combination. (Also, very relateable.) She did so well in school but now it's Real Life and that's pretty intimidating. I love how you've shown that. Oh, and personally, I think she can handle this job, but I also think it's going to be a lot harder than she might realize. Of course, that's often the case with jobs that are about people. You know?

The dialogue for the interview was spot on, and even more so the stilted internal processing from Felicity. Like this:
Felicity pondered for a minute. You were supposed to ask questions, right? Shoot. She didn’t have any.
--> SO TRUE!!! (this is basically me at every interview ever)

And the patients, oh my! I was laughing at the crazy scenarios you used for them, but at the same time it's kind of sad. I hope we get to learn about these characters in future chapters.

I also want to comment on something you said in your author's note, about this being self-indulgent and for you, and that being unusual. MORE POWER TO YOU! I mean, this is fanfiction. It SHOULD be self-indulgent, and it SHOULD be largely for you! I'm so so glad you're writing this if it makes you excited, and also because it's amazing and I'm selfish and I want to read more.

Happy Birthday, Sunshine! ♥ ♥ ♥

much love,

 Report Review

Review #6, by MuggleMaybeWhen Summer Fades: solstice

20th August 2016:
I thought you deserved another review after waiting SO LONG, and besides I absolutely had to finish the story!

This is brilliant, of course.

God, the scene with Anne and Bellatrix. *SOBS*

The inclusion of Kreacher was nothing short of genius. I'm pretty sure that isn't canon, but it feels so canon I'm almost doubting myself on that. It certainly fits! Also, Kreacher's involvement explains how he knew to go there in the first place. And nice tie in with the Horcrux research in the last chapter!

Voldemort really is the lowest of the low to abuse a house elf that way. At least Reg wasn't so cruel and took the potion himself like a decent human person. In the end, he's quite a hero, isn't he? ♥

I have so many questions I'd love to ask you about this story - please please please: FIC NIGHT!

I'm sorry I don't have as much to say about this chapter (still no cc).

All in all, this story is just about perfect. You've got the narrative arc, the characters, good dialogue - *favorites*

I would really love to read a little something from Summer's pov, I'll have to scour your AP to see if you've got anything. (Or beg you to write it :P)

wonderful writing, Kristin dear!
xoxo Renee

Author's Response: THANK YOU, you are the sweetest! ♥

I hated writing that scene (with Anne and Bellatrix), but it had to be bad to spur Regulus to action and do such a dramatic thing as destroying Voldemort's Horcruxes even with the knowledge of what might happen to him. but yeah. :'( *hands tissue to Renee*

Kreacher's involvement at the cave is actually canon - a lot of this chapter was based on what Kreacher recounts of the event to Harry in DH (I think the chapter was called "Kreacher's Tale", or something similar) So I can't claim credit for including him. I'm glad you liked the way the scene played out though!

wow, you know, I'd never thought of submitting any of my stories to fic night before. But I looked, and they have to be under 5k, so this one's too long. It means a lot to me that you suggested that though, thank you! I'm really flattered that you thought it was good enough for that. If you have questions you can pile 'em up in my Q&A thread on the forums though, I'm always glad to answer questions.

THANK YOU SO MUCH. seriously. these reviews were so wonderful, and so are you. *hugs Renee forever*

 Report Review

Review #7, by MuggleMaybeWhen Summer Fades: syzygy

19th August 2016:

Can we both agree that I probably shouldn't be allowed to have a review thread? Please forgive me.

Anyway, moving on to the review...

I mean, not even a little bit! Poor Summer :( I wish I could hug her!

I am very impressed with Reg's character development. It's all very gradual and believable. I think the idea of having experiences that open your eyes, but not necessarily one big "AHA! moment" is more true to life. Change takes time, and the way you've paced this has given Reg the time to believable change, without it feeling to slow as a reader.

Reg meeting Summer's family was so sweet, even though it was a bit awkward, and then the letters to and from Anne. OMG, that was the most lovely thing of all time. Well, and it was quite nice that he visited her in the first place. I think that was a smart choice on your part because it shows that he really has changed, that it isn't just his ideas which have shifted but his actions as well.

Oh, ALSO. The inclusion of the Hallows and horcruxes in his research was SO brilliant! Both because it was simply a nice homage to the series, and because it shows a fundamental goodness to Reg's character. He looks at those things on behalf of someone else, doesn't even consider using them for his own ends, and even dismisses them. That drew a sharp contrast between Reg and true Death Eater ideology that was just so great!

Reg and Summer are so great together. I love them as friends, and I wonder about them as something more. The idea that they might never have time to explore that is pretty sad, And I fear it will get sadder - and I also fear that I now see why you're using this reflective tone. You capture it so well, but ah... I suspect feels are approaching. :P

I couldn't think of any cc, to tell you the truth.

Honestly, I can't tell you how much I love your Reg and his angst-ridden struggle between these two paths. It's amazing. You've really sold this to me. I keep imagining it like a movie, wouldn't it be a great movie!?

OMG - you should 100% submit this for fic night please!!!

You're so brilliant! I wish I was able to read more often but please know that you are an amazing writer and I adore you!

much love

Author's Response: ♥♥ RENEE!! ♥♥

Um, no, I don't agree, haha. If you didn't have a review thread I wouldn't have got this amazing, thoughtful review from you. I totally didn't mind the wait when it was such a great reward! ♥ Nothing to forgive!

yeah, pretty sure Reg didn't see that coming either. With Reg's life being so tied in with the Death Eaters and his indecision regarding them, he kind of forgot that there were things going on entirely unrelated to the Death Eaters that were equally scary.

Thank you - I'm SO glad you like the character development in this - that's so great to hear that it's believable and well paced. I totally agree with you about how change takes time. And I think "aha!" moments kind of come out in retrospect; like you don't realize what a big change one moment had until later, because the process of change is slow. Anyway yeah, I'm glad that came across well.

That was a HUGE step for him to go visit her and be surrounded by all the Muggles - because you're right, it's the first time he really has to match his action to his words in front of others and he does it. I kind of want to give him a pat on the head there, I'm so proud of him :P. I'm so glad you liked his letter writing with Anne as well. I imagine it had a big effect on Regulus, to realize that this Muggle cared about him and showed it, a lot more than his own mother did.

Thank you, I'm so glad you liked the inclusion of the hallows and the horcruxes. It was kind of a last minute idea that came to me as I was writing the chapter and suddenly needed to incorporate. And yes you're right, I love what you point out about what it shows about Reg as a person, that's really insightful - that that scene alone hints that he's really not cut out to be a Death Eater. As Summer said in the first chapter, maybe Reg is not always nice, but he's good.

yep, as you are already aware by now... sad feels ahead. I'm glad you thought the tone made sense here though. Also thank you, I'm so so glad you like this portrayal of Reg and all his angsty indecision. A movie - oh man, wow, that's a huge compliment! Thanks!

omg how do I even respond to that last sentence there. *HUGS* THANK YOU!! guh, you are so kind and amazing and you leave the BEST reviews. ♥ love you.

 Report Review

Review #8, by MuggleMaybeAn Innocent Question: Life is good

13th August 2016:
copied from AO3

Hi Kappa! I'm here reviewing challenge entries. (Finally!)

This was one of the more challenging pairings on my list, in my opinion, and I'm really pleased you decided to run with it!

I think it's really cool that you decided to set this at a Pride celebration. :) Romance with older characters is sadly uncommon, so that was nice to see.

The characterization of Molly who "has never stopped loving anyone" is WONDERFUL. I adore Molly, and that is such a perfect statement of one of her best traits. Also, it's powerful coming from Andromeda, who presumably stopped loving (and certainly stopped being loved by) her family when she married Ted.

This is a beautifully captured moment. Thank you for entering this fic in the challenge!

xoxo Renee

Author's Response: Hello, Renee!

Thank you so much for this review, and for holding the challenge that inspired this story!

And compared to me, your "Finally!" is definitely unnecessary - I'm way, way later with this reply than your were with your review!

Writing Molly/Andromeda was certainly a little trickier than writing most pairings, hehehe... When you assigned me the pairing I didn't think I'd be able to do it at first, but then I got this image in my head of them as little old ladies at Pride, and I knew I had to write it! As you say, romance with older characters is rare, but old people deserve love too! : )

I was very pleased with myself when I came up with the line about Molly never having stopped loving anyone, so I'm super glad that it stood out to you and you liked it too! And yeah, you're right, that is extra powerful coming from Andromeda, with her complicated background...

Thanks again for this lovely review!


 Report Review

Review #9, by MuggleMaybeThis One Moment : This One Moment

13th August 2016:
God, I love them. ♥

Seriously Jill, I don't even know how to explain how much I love this. It's sincere, sweet, sexy. Albus's anxiety really resonates. You made those emotions so real, including the confusion of trying to figure out how you feel when you're overwhelmed or anxious, and I appreciate that a lot. And Scorpius. I want to marry Scorpius, okay? Please? (That description of the green shirt, oh my!) So, can I? No? Fine, Albus can have him. But I need you to recognize my sacrifice here :P

This is totally a tacky thing to say, but I don't care. The love between Scorpius and Al is so so deep in this story. I can feel that they would go to the ends of the earth for each other and it's like they don't know how to understand that degree of love yet, but they're getting there.

I'm out of words. I can't think of any cc. Well done, lovely!

xoxo Renee

Author's Response: Renee♥

I'm really starting to love Scorbus too. I'm so glad that Albus' anxiety was real; I like to deal with intense emotions, but I'm always careful, worried I'm not going to do them justice, so I'm really glad that you thought you appreciated it. And I don't know, you might have to fight me for Scorpius :P

They're on the brink of falling head over heels, and they're both terrified. And you're right; they don't know how to deal with those feelings quite yet, but they're working on it.

I'm so glad you enjoyed this, I loved writing it.


 Report Review

Review #10, by MuggleMaybeGraduating Interest: Graduating Interest

13th August 2016:
copied from AO3

Hello! I'm here at long last to review your entry for the Happy and Gay Challenge.

Teddy/Fred isn't a pairing I've seen often. Actually, I'm not sure I've ever seen it before. I really dig it!

I have to admit, I was distracted reading this by confusion over the context, and why they would throw a grad party at Hogwarts for one specific student. But, putting that aside it was very sweet how Teddy was so oblivious to Fred's feelings. And the stuff about Fred/Freddy/Freddie and the different spellings made me laugh!

His speech about his parents got me all teary :') Poor Remus and Tonks! It's nice that he likes to make people feel good. His parents would appreciate that quality. *hugs Teddy*
And then the kiss at the end - so cute!

I really like how you used the phrase "it's never just hello" and had the meaning shift. That is one of my favorite things to see in a story!

Very nice job and thank you so much for entering!

xoxo Renee

Author's Response: I honestly have no idea where the party came from- they're just all family so they orchestrated it and it was an excuse for a speech. Plus, at this point, Teddy's one of the most beloved students in the graduating class. (The Black twins are part of my AU and part of the Weasley-Potter clan and that was just an excuse to tease my normal readers. Sorry!)
It was a great challenge and I'm glad you enjoyed my story! It's one of my favorites at the moment. ^_^ So thank you!

 Report Review

Review #11, by MuggleMaybeThe Prince and the Pirate: The Prince and the Pirate

13th August 2016:
copied from AO3

JULIE! I am here, at long last, reviewing challenge entries...
and all I can say is AW! This is SO cute! Definitely fluffy! I'm so glad you wrote it :D

I am very impressed by how you built this story using only dialogue. Each character has a distinct voice that shines and keeps the thread of conversation clear. You did a brilliant job conveying the narrative and the characters that way, and I know that isn't easy. Of course, it helps that it's a framed story, but even the framing of regular Al and Scorpius and their kids creates a clear scene. I particularly loved the children's dialogue. “If Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy didn’t wed by his seventeenth year, the Malfoys would lose their magic forever.” “Oh no …” “You’ve literally heard this story a thousand times, I don’t—” HAHAHA LOVE.

It's interesting in terms of POV, because Scorpius is a rather unreliable narrator. I mean, "The royal family was worshiped by Muggles and elves and goblins and giants alike" -- doubtful haha. But it works so well to have Scorpius relate the story this way, showing himself in the best light, and then Albus shows up to roll his eyes and it really is so fabulous.
The dynamic between them is wonderful, they have chemistry in the way of people secure in their romance. Adorable.

I find myself wondering if this is the same version of Scorbus you've written in another story, or if this is a distinct version? Either way, I would love to read more about this incarnation and their silly kiddos.

Also, like Albus, I wouldn't say no to the dirty version ;) ;)

Thank you for entering the challenge with such a fun, fluffy story, I loved it!
xoxo Renee

 Report Review

Review #12, by MuggleMaybeWe're Adults Now: We're Adults Now

13th August 2016:
Hello! I'm here, after far too long, to review your entry for the Happy and Gay Challenge.

Scorpius and Al looking for their first home together is such a nice idea for a story. Lucky for them that Scorpius had saved up so much money!

Mr. Havertly is pretty oblivious, isn't he? haha It's sad to think they didn't want to tell him they're a couple for fear that he wouldn't sell them a house. I'm glad you included that though, because it's more honest. I know they will be very happy in their new home :)

Draco is such a jerk at times. However, it looks like things are improving on that front, which is good because they are ENGAGED yay! The engagement scene read distantly, like I was overhearing it without being able to see in. If you were to go back and edit this, I'd suggest adding in some description there.

This is a very sweet story about one of my favorite ships - I'm so glad you entered!

xoxo Renee

Author's Response: Hey Renee! It's okay, I'm a patient person. Thank you for starting the Happy and Gay Challenge (I'm serious, I loved it!)

I wanted it to fit with both your challenge, and the other one this story was for (The New Home Challenge).

Yes he is, I really did want this fic to be as honest as possible. I'm glad you saw that!

Draco is a jerk much too often, in a lot of my other fics he's super accepting, but I wanted another mini problem, because cliched extremely happy fics are the worst and completely unrealistic!

I kind of wanted the engagement to be like that actually. It was an attempt at kind of a surprising gesture, but who knows maybe I'll do a re-write.

Scorbus is one of my favourite ships too! I'm also glad I entered.


 Report Review

Review #13, by MuggleMaybeBlackbird: Blackbird

13th August 2016:
Hello Rose ♥

I'm here to review your entry for the Happy and Gay Challenge.

You know, I almost think you've cheated. Do you realize how much I love children? And HOLY COW is Cora darling or WHAT??!?!? If the prize was for "best strategy for playing to your audience" you would definitely get first place! You've done wonderfully with the actual challenge goal, too, though.

Discussing the issue of parenthood for LGBTQ couples and the added barriers they encounter, was a very unique and interesting take on the theme. This story has a little of everything - a little sexy, a little silly, a little romantic, a little somber - and a LOT adorable!

All the dialogue is perfect! Even though I haven't read many other of your Branbus stories (shame on me!!!), I felt like I got a very clear picture of them here.

And, because this cannot be overstated, CORA IS ADORABLE ♥

Brilliant job, lovely! Thank you for entering.

xoxo Renee

 Report Review

Review #14, by MuggleMaybeIn the Mourning: A Gryffindor is Not a Morning Person

7th August 2016:
Hi Bex! I'm here with a review for gift tag. ♥

I've never read a story about Harry visiting his parents' graves prior to book 7 before and I think it's a really nice idea. It seems completely in character to me for Harry to be up early to make a request like this, because he's always restless and obsessive when his emotions are high.

You developed the conversation really nicely. At first, there's some mystery about what Harry wants. The description of Umbridge is SO good, too! hahaha!

Now, let's talk about McGonagall. I love her. You've captured the odd combination of passion and pragmatism that makes her so wonderful. There is a great dynamic between Harry and McGonagall here, too. It's like, undercover fondness. SO , on characterization, really well done. Harry too!

The dialogue was really fun. "Potter, I doubt it has escaped your notice but your parents are-” “Dead. Yeah, I know."

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for reviewing :)
It was something that I thought was really plausible, and I wondered why JK hadn't put it in - I mean there's lots of implications, but maybe before GoF, there was definitely no reason not to go.

I love to hate Umbridge, it was so easy to write about her and give off that sense of dislike, because, well I'm yet to meet a person who says they like her.

Honestly, it makes me so happy that people have liked my characterisation of Minerva. She's my favourite character, when I was younger I had a teacher who was just like her so I draw a lot of inspiration for McGonagall from her.

That was honestly my favourite line to write, which sounds a bit tactless haha - but it was. A lot of the time dialogue comes before the plot, and that was one of the first lines that came to me. After that all the inspiration for the first three chapters came flooding in.

Thank you so much for such a great review!


 Report Review

Review #15, by MuggleMaybeThe Next Great Adventure: Chapter 2: The Transportation Office

21st June 2016:
I couldn't resist reading another chapter and sending you more BIRTHDAY WISHES, too.

Poor Dobby must have been absolutely frantic when he thought he'd failed right from the start. I suspect this journey will be good for his confidence. I know you can do it, Dobby!!!

That portkey guy should've been more helpful! Darn public transportation infrastructure is always in need of improvement ;)

The mentions of Charlie and Hannah gave me the feels.

I'm sorry this review is so sadly short. I don't have any CC to offer and I'm very eager to see Harry. I can hardly think about reviewing, I'm so excited! Please forgive me?

Happy Birthday sweetie!

 Report Review

Review #16, by MuggleMaybeThe Next Great Adventure: Chapter 1: Happenings

21st June 2016:

I've been a total slacker about reading for the last few months, but I couldn't pass up the chance to leave you a birthday review. Especially since I'm so intrigued by this story.

I confess, I'm usually a fan of stories that involve romance, and when I first read about this story I knew it would be well written, because it's YOU, but I wasn't sure it was my thing.

I was SO WRONG to hesitate! I LOVE it already!

It's really impressive to me how perfectly in character everyone is. Literally everyone. I liked how you captured the dynamic between Molly and Sirius. I wonder if they've seen each other often in the intervening years, or if this is an uncommon reunion? Molly seems to feel as bitter as ever toward Sirius, so I suspect the later. Oh, and I should also mention, I thought the dialogue was quite strong.

Dobby. Oh, that sweet elf. ♥

I really enjoyed this and I'm excited to see what happens to Harry and Dobby as they set out on their journey.

I hope you have a wonderful birthday.
lots of love!

 Report Review

Review #17, by MuggleMaybeOnce Upon The Marauders: The Untold Story: Signed, Sealed and Delivered.

25th May 2016:
Hello darling! ♥ TAG

I'm SO excited to read this. It's high time, isn't it?

The little opening bit about chance and choice gave me the chills. Just perfect!

Oooh, oh oh oh! I'm excited about your Lily. ♥ I just LOVE child Lily moments, and this is perfect! You created a wonderful scene - I think the blade of grass is a particularly nice touch, and I LOVE how she is oblivious to what we know are signs of Snape's not always savory character. They're both very much in character. Snape reads a little older than 11 to me, but then again I suspect he would have been old for his age, so that is a nice touch in its own right.

This little intro for Sirius is different from what I usually see. A lot of people paint the Blacks as horrible people right from the start, but I found your interpretation much more true to life. This life is what Sirius has always known, it's normal for him. Of course, we know from the books that he isn't enamored with Slytherin or blood purity when he starts at Hogwarts, but regardless, you show a relatively normal boy living a relatively normal wizarding childhood. I find that refreshingly honest. *nods approvingly*

OH MY MERLIN, YSH. Remus' section is just... kljfoiahefwfdsidhf. HOW did you manage to write Dumbledore so perfectly in character? I feel so sad for young Remus, in this story but also just, you know, always. I never thought about Dumbledore going to talk to his parents to arrange things, but it's entirely logical.

--> “Really?” mused Dumbledore, undeterred “Well, I dare say I agree. He does seem exceptionally skilled at Gobstones for such a young age. And his knowledge of hinkypunks - ”
YES YES YES. It is SO Dumbledore, and also BRB LAUGHING :D

I don't have a ton to say about James' section, since it's very happy and fun and doesn't introduce conflict like the others do. But that's exactly as it ought to be with James and you capture him so well!!

Aw, now, PETER is a different story from James, despite the similarly happy moment. You have giving the most perfectly telling insight on PeterRIGHT HERE:
--> If only they knew, he thought grudgingly. He had often considered telling them he was a wizard, but thought he would be ridiculed further.
Spot on! Also, his father as a traveling apothecary salesman is 110% my headcanon now. It fits so well.

Seriously... Siriusly... HOW DID IT TAKE ME THIS LONG TO GET HERE? I am just such a fail, because already I can tell that you are going to be brilliant at writing these characters and think of all the time I wasted NOT reading this! *shakes head in disappointment* I am so excited to read more!!! You're a fab writer, lovely! ♥


xoxo Renee

 Report Review

Review #18, by MuggleMaybeWhen Summer Fades: equinox

25th May 2016:

So, when I said I'd get to this in 24 hours, I actually met 240 hours. Forgot the 0. Sorry about that. *HIDES* Seriously, I'm *so sorry* this is extremely late, but I'm glad you requested!

You specifically asked about character. I think you've done a particularly good job showing the complexity of Reg's thought process about blood status and Voldemort and Summer. At the beginning he's clearly a pretty selfish guy, but also a guy with potential to show compassion. I loved that you pointed out both his moral dilemma and his conflict between Sirius and his parents.

This line is just PERFECTION:
--"Maybe you’re not always nice, but you’re good." -- LOVE ♥

I obviously don't know Summer quite as well, since she's an OC and not the POV character. I think she seems a little too perfect, almost, but since this is the first chapter I don't think there's cause to worry.

Oh my gosh, and the way you developed their relationship over time was just swoon worthy! It felt completely believable to me that he would gradually become attached to her sunny personality, whether he meant to or not. I am curious to learn more about her and what she sees in a (boy)friend like Reg. :)

If you revise, the thing I'd suggest looking at is point of view. Reg narrates this piece with a lot of distance. Even though I was interested in the story, I didn't feel like I was "inside" the story until I got to the sunset. I've tried to pinpoint why this is, and the only thing I can come up with is that starting with summary gives it a reflective feel, like Reg is looking back on something. When I started, I kept waiting for the moment when the reflection ended and the 'moment' began. I hope that makes some kind of sense. Basically, you might consider rearranging things a bit to start in a scene, if you want a more in-the-moment feel. However, if reflective is what you want then just ignore me :P

Summer seems totally sweet - definitely Power Puff worthy!! - and your cliff hanger ended was just BRUTAL (in the best way)! I don't have time to read a lot these days but this is most definitely on my list of things to continue with. Request any time - I love reading your work! ♥

lots of love!

Author's Response: RENEE ♥ ♥ Seriously you have nothing to apologize for! Thank you for reviewing!!

I'm glad you like the portrayal of Regulus so far and that you think his internal complexity is shown well. He is selfish, but also confused. Poor guy :( I think the conflict between himself, his parents, and Sirius, was probably one that weighed on him a lot - I always imagined Regulus and Sirius were close as kids, which would make things for Regulus pretty confusing after Sirius left. I love that you picked out that particular line about nice vs good, I like that line too :)

I always kind of wonder that about Summer too, because in this first chapter where Regulus kind of just sees her as faultless, it does make her seem a bit too perfect - but I'm glad that wasn't off-putting. I promise there is more to her, but yeah, it's a very biased lens we see her through in this chapter.

Thank you, it's great to hear that you liked the very gradual development of their friendship here :)

Ooh, and honestly I'm glad you mentioned that about him narrating with a lot of distance in the beginning. That's intentional - I don't know that I was aiming for reflective exactly, but definitely distance - the idea was that in the beginning he's still very afraid to be vulnerable, he's guarded, and as such his narration reflects that, and is mostly facts and lacks emotion. Sort of like he doesn't let you get into his head as much, if that makes sense? That of course changes later on as Reg changes - I'd be interested to know what you think of that development if you continue reading.

yeah, sorry about that cliff hanger :S Thank you so much for your review and all your kind words! ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

 Report Review

Review #19, by MuggleMaybeSanctuary: Sanctuary

24th May 2016:
Hi hun ♥

I'm SO sorry this is late! I've been pulled in a million directions lately, but I did not forget about your review!

First of all, so I don't forget - the Gone With the Wind reference made my NIGHT! I love that book & movie! :D

Now, to business.

I enjoyed this SO much. I always felt desperate for more of Percy's backstory in This Is Audrey Tang, and you've given me that here. YAY! Your Percy has this dark, brooding, but pragmatic presence that I find addictively easy to fall into. (I'm not sure I want to know what that says about me :P ) I'm blown away by how well you weave a world in your writing. It sucks me in so fast and often when I read a one shot by you, I wish it were a novel. I felt like that about Persephone and I feel it again now. Percy's story is so rich in detail and emotion, it's such a wonderful incarnation of his character that you've drawn.

However, I'm having a hard time figuring out how the words on the page make this happen. I think it's some sort of Gabbie magic :P
You convey Percy's emotions so well, along with his relationships and his attitude toward those relationships. I think that may be the greatest strength in this story. Of course, it doesn't hurt that the story is so interesting! I'd LOVE to hear about Percy's time in Russia. Then that thing with Kingsley offering him a job - what a scandal! And what an adjustment for Percy to go from the underground life he lived in Russia to Undersecretary. But I liked reading about the other Weasley's reaction even more.

And then Audrey's letter ♥ ♥ ♥

She's the coolest! And the letter is 100% adorable! She and Percy are absolutely adorable ♥ Plus, they have so much *chemistry* on the page. Full disclosure: I was kind of hoping you'd give us a little bonus scene at the end there bahahahaha!

Please take pity on me and write a prequel to This Is Audrey :P

Thanks so much for requesting!

love and hugs!

 Report Review

Review #20, by MuggleMaybeWhen I Go Out With You: I Won't Love You Anymore (Sorry)

23rd May 2016:

I had been really wanting to continue with this story anyway because it's fab, so your birthday was exactly the excuse I needed to stop by.

I wanted to leave you a crazy long, gushy, fangirling review - but I'm too distracted by THIS LINE:
"What was so wrong with letting Ernie set the rules if it meant I would be happy?"

Something about that just punches me in the gut. You don't take the easy way out, and I really admire that. It's so sad that Hannah feels guilty for not preventing this situation, not taking a stronger stance. I think she greatly underestimates herself, and so maybe she could have taken stronger positions on the "rules," as she puts it. But that wouldn't have changed anything - she's blaming herself for Ernie's faults and it fills me with righteous indignation. DOWN WITH ERNIE.

Yet, at the same time, I agree with her - she's only human and she was happy with Ernie and she shouldn't be blamed for doing what made her happy at the time. You've spotlighted a very real dilemma for a lot of women: the idea that women cannot be independent and also experience love. Which is obviously FALSE in every way, and I'm so lad you're addressing it. No one could do it better! ♥

Also, what Ernie said about her changing clothes: GET LOST ERNIE YOU JERK. I mean, seriously. DOWN WITH ERNIE.

I really want to read more and get to a place where Hannah is happy - and perhaps Erie gets his just desserts :P However I've got TV to watch, so that's all for now. ;)

Love ya!

 Report Review

Review #21, by MuggleMaybeSleep Without Pain: Sleep Without Pain

18th May 2016:
Hi there! :) I’m here with your requested review.

I’m a little nervous to read this because I love cats and this seems quite sad. But I’m sure it’ll be brilliant, so here goes!

I was right: this is both sad and brilliant. My kitty doesn’t live with me and I’ve got half a mind to race to my parent’s house to snuggle her! :,(
But, the point is, you’ve done a marvelous job conveying emotion through your writing in this story.

It’s really interesting that you chose to write this from Crookshanks’ POV. Huge points for originality – I’ve definitely never seen that before. What I really appreciate about that choice is that as the reader, I know Crookshanks’ approves of their decision to put him down, and I know it was the right choice. That’s very reassuring.

For me, the perfect word for this story is tender. You convey Crookshanks’ pain and weariness very clearly, and that’s very sad, but at the same time it’s clear how much Hermione loves him, and how much he loves her.

“I try to purr to soothe her, but I can’t; it’s too hard to breathe.”
--> this is positively heartbreaking.

You’ve drawn Hermione as a loving, compassionate person, and that certainly rings true. And you’ve done a wonderful job with Ron! I’m usually not a huge fan of Ron, to be honest, but I love that he and Crookshanks have a sort of grudging but mutual respect, and the image of him chasing the poor cat around with his Patronus is sheer brilliance! :D He’s in character and also likeable, which I find impressive.

Really, to have useful CC I need to get a little nitpicky, but I do have something. I noticed that in the narration you occasionally fell into the “telling” trap. (We all do it!) Here’s an example of what I mean—
“I really don’t want to go to her, she’s just going force my mouth open and push stuff down my throat again. I decide not to move. If she wants me, she can come to me.”

The sentence “I decide not to move” is clearly implied by the following sentence, which I also find more evocative. So, you could omit that sentence and convey the same thing, arguably with more impact.

I hope that makes sense – it’s just a thought, not a problem.

Thank you for requesting this even though it is so sad. It’s also very sweet, and Crookshanks voice resonates. Well done.

Definitely request any time!

Author's Response: Thank you so much for your very kind review. I'm sorry it took me a few days to answer it, work's been insane.

I have cats and I think it shows that I'm beginning to be concerned with them as they approach the time we'll have to put them down. I love writing from Crookshank's perspective and have written another a long time ago with him trying to sleep.

I'm so glad you enjoyed it. I'm also glad it made you want to snuggle your kitty.

Thanks also for the CC, that's something I try to work on, as sometimes what I write has a good plot (I think) but then I just tell and tell and never show, so it's something I'm working on and having it pointed out makes it easier to try to avoid in the future.

Ah, Ron, he often gets shorted in stories, especially as an adult, so I'm glad you liked his detente with Crookshanks.

Thanks oodles for the confidence builder.

 Report Review

Review #22, by MuggleMaybeObliviate: Obliviate

17th May 2016:
Hello dear :)

I’m here for your requested review and I confess I didn’t read the summary until I clicked on the story and I’m almost crying already. Usually I am irritated when movie adaptations add things that aren’t in the source material, but the way they added this scene in the movie was AMAZING, and I’ve never read a fic about it before so I am Quite Excited. But also crying.

Here we go.

*Cue tears*

Yep, TEARS. I need a moment. And a tissue.

Hermione is the one that has her act together. She’s the one who has a plan, who is composed, and logical, and reliable in the face of so much chaos. But of course, she also has, to borrow the phrase, an emotional range MUCH larger than a teaspoon. You’ve pulled back the curtain so we can see past her calm façade, and I can tell you took great care in considering how she would feel.

I particularly love her observation that Ron and Harry don’t realize how much she relies on them. I think that’s really true, and it makes me really want to climb into the story and give Hermione a tremendous hug. *HUGS FOR HERMIONE*

She expresses a sort of feeling of powerlessness – that she doesn’t have a choice about the war, and doesn’t have a choice about her parents. There’s a fascinating contrast between that experience of powerlessness and the immense power she wields in casting the Obliviate spell.

For CC, I suggest looking for ways to build in sensory details. I think moments that carry such heavy meaning for the participant tend to resonate more when there’s a strong sense of place. Just a thought.

I found one error with tense – “Everything in my room is packed except for visible items so that they didn’t catch on that I am leaving.” --> “didn’t” should be “don’t”

I LOVE that you finished with just that one word, Obliviate. A perfect final stroke.

This was super sad but you’ve really gotten into Hermione’s thoughts and I’m so glad you requested a review! Definitely drop by my thread any time! :)

xoxo Renee

 Report Review

Review #23, by MuggleMaybePersephone : Persephone

17th May 2016:
Hi Gabbie! ♥

In your request you said you aren’t sure if I’ve read your Percy/Audrey novel. Well, I have, and I was accordingly SUPER PSYCHED to see this request in my thread! I’m sorry I didn’t get to it more quickly, but I’m here now and so excited to read!

Aw, right away I think it’s brilliant that you focused in on Audrey’s reactions to becoming a mother. Given her own family history it makes sense she would be nervous about it. I feel so sad for her when she thinks about her mother and not getting to experience pregnancy with her mom by her side. :,(

Every time I read your stories, I’m impressed all over again by how marvelously complex and believable Audrey is. On one hand, I know she’s super tough and independent, but on the other hand, she is very vulnerable and struggles with feelings of inadequacy. I think many real people have both those traits, and yet very few characters do. I commend you for that!

I LOVED the connection with the Hades and Persephone myth and it was so incredibly sweet when Percy said he loved her with all her imperfections. ♥ ♥ I am swooning right alongside Audrey!!

I also absolutely adore the way you’ve written Fleur. I think the way she’s portrayed in the books is very biased, and that really she has a good heart. I love that your version of her portrays that and I’m going to be stalking your AP for Bill/Fleur stories very soon! Seriously, your version of her is quite possibly my favorite I’ve ever read!

Audrey’s relationship with Bill was a bit alarming, but smart because it upped the tension to have a somewhat more antagonistic character in the story. It sounds like maybe he judges her for her past? Stupid bloke :P I would’ve liked a clearer understanding of why there’s so much tension between them, on both sides. Then he comes through for her, and it seems like they could mend things, which is also fascinating. Maybe another story to write…? ;)

You wrote the contractions so well - they came a little out of the blue, so that I was immediately on the edge of my seat. Very gripping and suspenseful writing!

I think my main CC is that the story meanders quite a bit. I enjoy the different lines of thought, but it feels a little unfocused. For example, the part about Audrey reuniting with her brother is interesting, but in my opinion doesn’t feel connected to the rest of the story. I almost feel like this could be a short story collection capturing the different ideas and moments you mention here in more detailed focus. There are some wonderfully rich moments mentioned and brushed off, and I think that detracts a bit from the point of this story but each event would be a wonderful story in its own right.

There are also a few places where you’re missing words – just typos, probably. Happens to me ALL the time! *rolls eyes at self* So maybe do a read through looking for that. :)

Thank you SO much for requesting this review – I loved reading more about Audrey and Percy! Definitely stop by again so I have an excuse to read more of your amazing work!! ♥

xoxo Renee

 Report Review

Review #24, by MuggleMaybeThief: Scones And Jam

14th May 2016:
Kaitlin! ♥
Now that my classes are done for a few weeks, I am finally getting around to reviewing my challenge entries.

But first of all, a belated CONGRATULATIONS ON 100 CHALLENGES! I can't tell you how honored I am that my challenge is number 100! :D

I was pleasantly surprised to see you set this during the war, with the dark backdrop of the Carrows' reign at Hogwarts. I never considered how Romilda would've reacted to that situation, and you’ve shown that it truly brought out her Gryffindor nature. She’s brash and reckless, but also so brave to sacrifice herself to torture for a good cause. It’s very powerful. Somewhat like your Eloise story, this made me want to read more about Romilda and see what other hidden depths she might reveal. The traits you show her exemplifying as a Gryffindor are very time-honored Lion traits, but I didn’t expect them to manifest in this way, so nicely done there.

You are SO GOOD at writing house elves. Which reminds me, Winky’s involvement made me so happy! How adorable and perfect and YES YES YES!

I liked how you ended it without spelling out what was going to happen, but it was still crystal clear from the set up what was to come. Yay, Romilda!

This is a strong entry, and perhaps even stronger as a story in its own right, challenge aside.

Thank you so much for entering, and congrats again on meeting your 100 challenges goal!

Lots of love,

p.s. I am craving a score with clotted cream and jam now :P

 Report Review

Review #25, by MuggleMaybeLiar: Children

14th May 2016:

Also, hello lovely! Happy Hot Seat!! ♥

This story is SO SWEET and SO SAD and SO GOOD and going on my favorites the moment I'm done writing this review!!!

I love how you've started this when they're quite young and not really aware of the world around them. The way you show that they were friends before anything happened, perhaps before Remus was bitten, is amazing because it changes how I think about Peter in a major way.It's just so so wonderful, I don't even have the words!!!

And their MOTHERS! OMG! You've done So amazingly with the mothers! They're both very believable, and I can see how the boys take after their families and are affected by their families. And I feel so so bad for Sylvia and John dealing with Remus, and Sylvia sitting outside the garage while Remus transforms for the first time... *SOBS* YOU ARE BREAKING MY HEART.

Peter is such a child in the birthday scene, but of course that makes sense because he is LITERALLY a child and I love that you show him feeling normal feelings children feel. And the Platform 9 3/4 scene broke my heart again - no wonder Remus always seems so wise! He really starts thinking about things differently from such a young age, and putting other people's desires and needs ahead of his own and ALL THE HUGS FOR REMUS.

I honestly don't know what else to say besides ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

I absolutely adore this story, and I absolutely adore you, too!

lots of love!

Author's Response: Aww, Renee!!! *hug* *wub*
You are so sweet!!! Thank you so much!!!

Ah, I'm so glad you liked their early friendship (yes, they were friends before Remus was bitten) and that you could see Peter in another light (I have a soft spot for Peter).

Mary and Silvia are both very interesting and sweet women. I love them both a lot. I'm so happy you liked what I did with them, and that you could see how their personalities affected the respective sons.

Yes... having a son turned into a werewolf would be heartbreaking for any parent, wouldn't it? But John and Silvia are wonderful parents, so strong and so full of love, and they are willing to stay by Remus' side in the best way they can. It did break my heart to write the first full moon scene, though... :(

Poor, little Peter... so lonely and lost without his best friend... of course, he's very childish in that scene (after all, he is a child...) I also tried to hint to his dark side there. He's foundamentally egoistic and peevish and he can hold a grudge. But he's just a normal kid feeling normal kids' feelings. At least for now.

Poor, little Remus... He's already suffered so much at such a young age... he had to grow up very quickly, and that's the reason he's so much wiser and more mature than the other kids his age. And he definitely needs a few hugs!!!

I'm so glad you liked this first chapter, and I'd love to know what you think about the rest too!!! Thank you so much for this lovely review, my dear!

All the love in the world!

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login

<Previous Page  Jump:     Next Page>