Reading Reviews From Member: Gaiapet
  
75 Reviews Found

Review #26, by GaiapetThe Morning Waffle: Panache

10th August 2010:
Great first paragraph! I am loving this! Great way to introduce all the characters. They are all idiots, but I love them already. Great last paragraph!

Author's Response: Thank you!

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Review #27, by GaiapetHide and Seek: Story Worth a Thousand Pictures

10th August 2010:
I love this chapter! It seems exactly like how Jane would act after the fight. Plus it is funny! I loved your first author's note! Jane is in such denial. I mean, she is cleaning and reading books reserved for torture. Its weird reading, because we know that she is in complete denial, but she doesn't and it is from her point of view. I'm happy that she talked to her dad and made up with him. With everything going wrong right now, she needs to have her good relationship with her dad. I think making Doger her friend is one of the best ideas you had. It just works for them! Plus we get more Doger! I love him. He is funny, sweet, and knows Jane and knows that she is not okay. Plus he has shiny hair! Riff-Raff. I love the story about Jane's mom. It was so amazing and she seemed like an amazing woman. Jane is the product of two great people. Her moment with the picture was sad but sweet. I like the parallels to her relationship with Oliver. Yay Mr.Darcy! The girls are pretty much beyond amazing. Especially Alicia! What a girl...

"It’s not like we ended in some huge disaster fight like Oliver and I did. We can still be friends and chat about life and problems and the color of draperies.”
“Do you think we’ll ever talk about draperies?”
“Probably not, but the possibility is there.” I shrugged.
-Haha, this makes me laugh. Doger is so good at dealing with crazy Jane

Now this was a fridge! There were carrots (which I wasn’t a big fan of) and salad (which was sort of crunchy when eaten with certain dressing) and thawing meat products (which I couldn’t cook). But it was filled with real food from the half gallon of two percent milk to the nearly-empty bottle of syrup on the door.
-Quite a fridge. I think Jane would rather have a fridge full of things she didn't like or couldn't cook than one with only a few things that she loved.

Eggs were my thing—my calling perhaps. Maybe I’d go into egg making for a living and start inventing different ways to cook eggs and serve them to people like the Minister or The Weird Sisters or something wicked like that.
-EGGS! I personally am not a fan of eggs, but I crave them when I read about Jane's obsession. Haha!

Oh, bugger. This summer was garbage and everyone knew it. Okay, only I knew it because everyone else was off swimming with leeches and looking at china patterns.
-Yay swimming with leeches! Her summer really is garbage right now. But the sun will come out tomorrow!

“Okay, maybe I won’t go on a date yet. But maybe soon I’ll meet someone while going down the street for a cheeseburger and then you’ll see. And then we’ll snog and not talk about Quidditch and it’ll be perfectly lovely, I’ll have you know.”
-What a great way to meet an imaginary guy. They sound very cute together.

I was lucky to have it in my bag since he let me walk to the village park for the first time alone (I won’t mention how foolish that was considering I was six, but I didn’t end up kidnapped or killed).
-Mr.P, you crazy man! Best dad ever!

She didn’t hex me, though. I asked her why and I remember her dusting off her robes and picking up the one book that had fallen while she hexed my mates to smithereens. What a class act she was, eh? She told me she didn’t hex me because I wasn’t on the team and she cheated off me on a Charms essay once when she didn’t remember a few steps.”
-She is amazing. The definition of class. If I could be someone, I think it would be her. A story about Mr. P and her would be great, but I know you don't like to write Marauder era stuff. If you ever get the urge, I would read it!

Girls night (well, nights) at my place—the boys will survive a bit without our pretty faces. Tonight—bring games, candy, nail polish, and every other cliché bunch of rubbish you can find around your messy rooms. This is going to be absolutely epic.
-Oh yes! Epic it will be. Dun, dun, dah. It sounds like time at Katie's house is usually amazing and epic though.

I loved this chapter even though Jane was a crazy person in it. I thought it was great!

Author's Response: I also really like Jane's reaction to the breakup. She has never been through anything like it, and since it was so negative, she had to act like she was better off...and thus, made eggs haha! I love that her and Dodger are friends as well. They've always been fantastic even when they weren't together. I think they make pretty good friends haha. I'm glad other people think so :)

I am not an enormous fan of eggs myself, but sometimes they're a great breakfast food or random middle of the night craving haha. Am I the only person who makes random egg sandwiches at three in the morning?

If I ever get a Marauder urge, I'll definitely let you know :)

Katie's house will certainly be epic. In good ways and in bad, lol.

Thanks for the wonderful review! I appreciate it! xoxo


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Review #28, by GaiapetHide and Seek: Short Skirt, Long Sigh

9th August 2010:
I took a break on reviewing and totally forgot that I hadn't finished reviewing these chapters! So sorry! I hope that the reviews I plan on leaving will make up for the absence! Plus my review on the latest chapter was super duper long! Here we go...
I hate this chapter. Not because it is badly written, but because it makes me cry. So I guess that means that it was very well written. It needed to happen, but I hate it. They just weren't communicating. Everything was bottled up and then released over some stupid things. When I first read this, I thought "Why didn't she just eat the waffle or something?", but then I realized that it was just a catalyst. If it didn't happen then, it would have just gotten worse. Her relationship with everyone is screwed up right now. She is mad at her dad and isn't having the amazing relationship with him that she had. She even cleaned the toilet- an obvious sign that something is wrong. She has a point about Lou being sprung on her, which was bad, but she did blow it a bit out of proportion. It is just so sad that some communication would make everything better. She also needs to communicate with her friends. If she is missing comments about her legs, she hasn't seen the twins in far too long.
When Jane talks about Bridget and bunnies, she says she has no idea where the bunny part comes from. I'm pretty sure that it comes from Libby. The hit of the forest. I love continuity! When Jane knocked by kicking the door, she was doing it like the ancient Romans. Fun facts learned in Latin class!

Quotes (some taken out of context of the rest of the sad conversation)
Ah, but I wouldn’t be walking. I could Apparate now and by George, I was going to. By Fred as well.
-Great line! I have to admit, I have always wanted someone to write that! I miss the twins in this chapter. But very funny line!

“Because you’re not dating an average boy. You’re dating Oliver Wood, International Quidditch sensation and rather handsome bloke.”
“Don’t forget the pompous prat part of that, you seemed to have missed it.”
-Haha, but that's why she loves him. I said it, LOVES HIM! Too bad she doesn't remember that later in the chapter. I love the pompous prat part too...

This is ridiculous.” I stabbed my sandwich with a toothpick. “Are you well aware boyfriends are supposed to agree with their distressed girlfriends? I think that is in a rule book somewhere.”
-I believe that that is a rule. Someone should write a rule book for guys. But that would make it to easy for them

It wasn’t like we were an old married couple withering away with no sex drive. I had plenty of drive. Of course, I was an inexperienced driver with no license, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t handle it.
-Hahahaha! Jane is such a strange duck! Once again, she should communicate with him!

My face fell and I couldn’t help it. I thought about what could potentially be in that fridge. Tuna? Bread? Mold? The arm of the Canons figurine ripped off by the Keeper from Brazil? Who knew?
-Very interesting fridge content.

That fight was...intense, but not. I'm not sure what I mean. I think that it was inevitable so we were more prepared. I won't lie, I cried when I read it. Such a stupid fight that shouldn't have happened! It had to happen, but I still didn't want it to. Bah, I'm not making much sense. I think that it is important that she apparated to South France, but I'm not sure what it means. That last line, it gets me every time. Such a good ending to the chapter. I didn't think that it was written as well as the rest of your chapters for the first 2/3. Jane seemed unJaney. I know that she was having issues, but I felt like she wasn't acting like how she normally acts when having issues. I felt she kept things too bottled up and internal for her. Later in the story she acts more like how I would picture her acting when having issues. It also seemed that you were forcing some of the issues that they were having- like the flowers, his mom, and him not agreeing with her about her dad. I thought that he would have at least let her rant because he knows how she is. I thought that the fight was very, very well written though. So all in all, good chapter, but not my favorite.

Author's Response: "If it didn't happen then, it would have just gotten worse." Ding ding ding. That's exactly right. They had been bottling so much up and it was only a matter of time before it exploded. It was a shame since they're so wonderful together, but it had to happen. At least I think so ;)

You're right about the communication. So many things could have been solved just by talking it out. Jane blew the Lou thing out of proportion, though she would have reacted so much better if she might have had a head's up. If only, lol.

The Romans kicked the doors instead of knocking? Hardcore! Let's bring that back.

I'm so glad you enjoyed the by Fred line as well. I've been waiting to write that haha :) I needed the perfect moment.

I know what you mean about it having to happen eventually and it's sad. She apparated to Southern France because it was sort of when the whole thing started, when the negativity started during the Quidditch World Cup.

The forcing of the issues was exactly the point. Jane panicked about her relationship. She did the exact same thing Ang did. She used those small things as a reason to panic and exit the relationship. And she just overreacted. Oliver, of course, didn't take it well simply because he doesn't like being accused of, well, anything.

I'm glad you liked the chapter! Thank you so much for the wonderful review!


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Review #29, by GaiapetBreaking the Quidditch Code: To the Hospital Wing (already)

9th August 2010:
I love this story! I'm going to start reviewing all the chapters after I finish with Keep Away. I admit it, I want a nice response congratulating me for being 1001. I may be as pompous as Twitwards. I am not ashamed.

Author's Response: Of course you'll get a 1001 response! 1001 is a sweet number because it's the same forward as it is backward :) Congrats on being 1001 and thank you so much! I am really looking forward to seeing what you think of all the chappies of BTQC! Thanks!

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Review #30, by GaiapetThe Morning Waffle: Prologue: Another Show, Another Sickle

9th August 2010:
I love next gen and everyone recommends this story, so I have high hopes for it! I thought it was funny and I can't wait to get to know all the characters better! I love the idea of Mrs.Weasley calling Fred to ask him if he is eating well and stuff! The name of the show is awesome! I also like the idea of the clock. On to the next chapter!

Author's Response: I hope this fic lives up to the hype! XD Thanks for checking out this story, and for reviewing! I really hope you enjoy the rest of it, and grow to love the characters as much as I do. ^_^

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Review #31, by GaiapetCountry Air: Country Air

9th August 2010:
So cute and sweet. I read this way before reading KA and H/S and loved it. I totally forgot before right now that her name was Jane. It made me super happy! I love how it is full of the cute, awkward Oliver! So cute!

Author's Response: Haha, I was on a Jane kick for a while of course. Wrote this for a challenge a while ago :) I'm glad you enjoyed it! Thank you so much!

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Review #32, by GaiapetBreaking the Quidditch Code: Eyeball Torture, A Shower, and Purple Silk

7th August 2010:
My, my, my. Well worth the wait. Very good, very funny, lots of things happened. I already had an inkling about what would happen in the beginning (thank you for that), but I was very surprised about how everything turned out. I can't wait to find out what the hell went on between Bink and Meta! Plus Jamesie seems to finally figure something out!

I'm going to leave longer reviews for all the chapters once you've finished so that I will be able to pick up on all the seemingly unimportant parts that are important. Reading my reviews is quite and incentive, eh? Haha!

*Although he was not mentioned by name, OLIVER FREAKING WOOD was at the party! I know that Jane doesn't exist in this story, and even if she did, Darla the blonde is not her daughter. Jane wouldn't stand for a blonde daughter and neither would genetics. Off track. Anywho, I picture her dancing with all the dishy guys at the party while thinking sarcastic thoughts about the gaggle of girls surrounding Oliver.

Can't wait for the next chapter!

Author's Response: You're very welcome for the sneak peak. I know what it's like to have a bummer day and things like that always make me feel better. I'm glad you're excited for Bink and Meta. It's going to be a fun story.

haha, your reviews are definitely an incentive. I love when people reread and pick out foreshadowing. Love it :)

HAHA yeah, Oliver Wood was definitely there :) Love it. I know Dara comes off as a bit harsh, but I'm sure you get that off the pitch she acts different. And not talking to James about Quidditch, she's a different person. :) Thanks so much for the wonderful review!


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Review #33, by GaiapetHide and Seek: Who Knew it was a Girl?

25th July 2010:
LOVE this chapter! Does the chapter title refer to the snitch? Alica is such a good chaser, just imagine how good she would be as a keeper! Oliver is such a dish! He was so concerned and sooo cocky and sweaty in his tight Quidditch kit! Can I have him? Shouldn't Jane be able to stay on a broom despite an elbow to the side? Or is that kind of skill reserved for non-reserves? Jane should Emerson-punch Medusa seeker and Bridget! Right in the face! Damn right she is having sex with Oliver! Lucky girl...And she went out with Liam who is very, very dishy! I'll take him too please! Danny Boy was perfectly skilled, arrogant, and amazing! Jane finally thanked him! It probably took her so long because she didn't write it on every part of her body. I hope we get more of Danny Boy in future chapters! I wonder what Bridget is going to do. I'm not really that concerned for Jane though. She is dumber than Libby knocked on the head by a bludger. Mr.P is such a good dad! Who knew choosing lunch could be so difficult? Some places really shouldn't show the desert when people are concentrating on food. Of course eating desert first is a sound option! Jane says Beau! DOGER! LOVE! He is such a sweetheart! So cute with Farm Team Girl(I will never use her real name)-very polite and debonair! And dishy! After our conversation about Mr.Darcy, I decided that Doger is very much like Mr. Bingly. They certainly do know some dishy guys. If only I were so lucky...Haha! I want to shop with Valerie; she seems to know where all the sales are! Alicia's a keeper! I love the image of Katie in furry pink slippers! Are you ready for a bunch of quotes?
The problem with being in the air, however, was the fact that I was in the air.
-Usually people think of that before they go in the air. Silly Jane!
(apparently she kicked out one of the other Chasers so she could play. Leave it up to her.)
-Good ol' Alicia! I love her! Such a her thing to do.
“I don’t want you falling when I don’t know I can catch you.” Oliver winked at me
...
Oh.
Hey, Snitchie.
-I LOVE Jane bribing the snitch! Sweet, concerned Oliver. I love him! Doesn't Medusa-seeker know that only Danny Boy can pull off his smirk?! Speaking of Danny Boy, I love him! I can't imagine him actually leaving the snitch when he is physically able to see it! I guess he doesn't want to get on the team's bad side. And then he growls! Son of a batch of cookies! Hahaha!
“Perry, what are you doing?!” Ellis cried, obviously unable to contain his fury when the Snitch was a few meters from him.
“Thought I’d put on a little show,” I mumbled.
-Why can't the seekers just get along? Haha. Poor Danny Boy; he can't get the snitch and Jane is being sarcastic to him.
Should have been a red card, as Lou would say.
...
She was completely oblivious, which was strangely convenient for me, but I took my time pretending to look here and there in case she was to see where my eyes went and grabbed for it.
-They should be silver and green because they are cards for bad things. Slytherin- hiss! Black-haired-monster-seeker is not at her best. She should spend less time trying to kill Jane.
I flipped him off. Then I remembered there were cameras everywhere and that would probably end up in Quidditch Weekly knowing my luck. “Shut it.”
-Haha. He deserves it though. At least the picture would be of her in short shorts. Fred could have a new picture to put on George's wall!
Don’t do it, Snitchie.
...
Maybe it was the crowd, but so help me Merlin I could pretend it was making any noise I wanted it to make!
-I LOVE these bits!!! She should have counseling with the snitch to make everything right. I love how it taunts her. Sorta like how the broom stares back at her. Of course the snitch wants the boy snitch! It probably has quidditch muscles and the amazing smirk that comes with being part of the game! Maybe he has extra shiny wings. Does Jane ever bring a dishy snitch? Do boy snitches exist? If she doesn't, will all girl snitches unite and refuse to be caught by Jane because she ruined the love life of this snitch? What are the consequences of this lie!?! I'm sure Merlin approves of Jane's imaginary noises...
“I can’t believe you caught it! Good job, Jane! Wait till I tell everyone else and totally gloat, saying I was there and they weren’t. Oh, the envy!”
-Oh, Alicia...
I really should have found out her name instead of making up my own, but what was the fun in that?
-What is the fun in that? I loved the nick-names, by the way! They made me laugh! I especially loved the ones using Medusa and Hippogryphs!
Alicia was practically drooling at the amount of gorgeous men around. Why weren’t they available back at Hogwarts when she was whining about being single? Now poor Lee had to compare to the abs of Liam and the rear or Stewart. Not to mention Oliver Wood.
-Drool….Went on a mental field trip to Quidditch land...It's wonderful there...
I could have kissed him right there. Well, I did, but that wasn’t the point.
-Hahaha!
“To stupid breakups and Quidditch bums!”
-I'll drink to that!
I hoped the night I met her wasn’t a fluke. I was still awesome, right? I had to be. I was Jane Perry
-Damn right you are Jane Perry. Jane Perry is always awesome!
She had that fair skin people talked about. I didn’t know what people, but people definitely talked about it. At some point.
-Haha!
Hi? Really. I was such an idiot sometimes.
-Haha, she is so smooth! A real Casanova.
“Famous Quidditch writer? Yeah, that one. I’ve heard there’s one that does palm reading, not that one.”
-Hahahahahaha!
I obviously loved this chapter! So many favorite parts that made me laugh super hard and crave cheesecake! I had to delete quite a bit of this because I went over the limit!

Author's Response: Yeah, the chapter title refers to the Snitch :)

I don't know. If I got an elbow to the side that caught me completely off guard, and I was already in a turn, I'd probably fall off to. Maybe ? Why won't you use Madeline's name? Because she's with Dodger? haha

You're right. He's very like Mr. Bingley. Mr. Bingley is my favorite. Forever :) Just watched that movie the other night. So wonderful!

I wish I could respond more to that enormously awesome paragraph you left me but my brain seems to have fizzled out today. I'm loving it, and all the wonderful quotes. Especially the last one! One of my faves, haha.

Jane really cracks me up, as does Oliver. As do they all.

Thank you so much for the amazingly large and wonderful review! xoxo






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Review #34, by GaiapetHide and Seek: He'd die, Lou Beckett

21st July 2010:
Ohh, Lou. She is such a nice woman who cares about Mr.P and she gets stuck in the cross-fire. Mr.P really should have given Jane a little warning. My "friend is coming over"- he couldn't have said girlfriend?! I like Lou. I think she is super nice and good for Mr.P. I would want him, but he is way to old for me, so I'll let Lou have him. Eggs. Oliver's kisses. Wow. They would so be worth anything. Wow.

Oliver groaned. “Someone shut her up,” he said, eyes closed.
“Alicia’s trying but she doesn’t have much aim in the morning,” I muttered. “Try harder, ‘Licia.”
-Shouldn't she have better aim in the morning if practices were in the morning? I love how the solution to everything is to throw pillows!

Did I really throw a fit over Bridget? Over how Oliver reacted to Roger? I was quite the character.
-Yes you are, Jane, yes you are

And then George would be out on the streets because he apparently couldn’t do anything other than be a prat.
“The Ministry might hire you then,” said Lee and I chuckled.
-Haha, good statement

What? Was I supposed to find out what we had in common and what her favorite flavor lollipop was? Rubbish.
-Overreaction on Jane's part.

Oh, hello, Lou Beckett, I adore you even though you’re the reason I had to watch Quidditch alone at night and eat real food. I came home for the summer to eat rubbish! Pizza! Popcorn! Salads drenched in dressing!
-Whiny Jane. Good to know that Mr.P's salad from the first chapter was the norm.

Take that, Lou Beckett. You may be trying to murder my dad with your beads and snogging him in the hallway, but I was going to lunch at Oliver’s place tomorrow and you could just stick that in your juice box and suck it.
-Wow, I bet Lou really feels put in her place...

So there is a great possibility that I am going to not review for a while because I don't want to read the next chapter. It just makes me too sad. But maybe I will. Who knows! I love this story, even the sad parts!

Author's Response: I definitely agree. Both Jane and Mr. P were at fault for that whole fiasco. Mr. Perry really should have given Jane some serious warning that he was even going out on dates. She was completely caught off guard. And Lou was caught in the middle. And her being a Muggle. It's just a bad situation, lol.

I hope you decide to continue. Even though it's such a sad chapter it has a lot of merit :) Thanks so much for the wonderful review--plus all the rest of course!


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Review #35, by GaiapetHide and Seek: A Crusting of Cake

21st July 2010:
Doger. Dishy Doger. With a chapter image. And an amazing personality. And dishyness. I love him so. And he smells like grass and daisies! Which is a little un-manly. Shouldn't he smell like knife wound or something? But I like daisies and grass and I like Doger. Fred is a very good friend. Treating Jane like a birthday girl when Oliver was being a prat and being part of a rant that he wants no part in. Liam Denters kissed her hand. What a gentleman!

“Do you think that if Libby was here I’d talk to her?” he snapped.
“Yeah, well, I wouldn’t either,” I said with a lofty chuckle. “She’s a prat.”
-True statement

“Yes, how tragic indeed,” I said. “But isn’t it unbelievable that as time goes on we end up being together longer? I thought it was purely magical.”
-Hahaha! Poor Bridget. She had no idea what she was going up against. Jealous Jane uses more sarcasm than normal Jane and Bridget can't handle it!

Alicia snorted and tried to disguise it as a cough as Angelina did. Unfortunately hers failed and she started giggling. Lee covered her mouth.
-At least she tried to be polite. Covering Alicia's mouth seems more covert though.

I stared at Bridget, wondering if I could fling the lemon at her eyeball and not get thrown out of the box. This was my birthday. She was a twit.
-I would say no. Even though everyone hates Bludger for Brains, her parents own the box.

I chose to ignore Bridget as she leaned against the granite bar and told Oliver about how his eyes shined and I also chose to ignore Oliver as he big headedly told her he knew.
-Pompous git. With shining eyes.

Oliver let out a sigh. “Don’t hate poor Bridget.”
“And why not?”
“Because she’s dumber than a box of Bludgers and likes my pretty face.” He smiled.
“I’m not sure why, you’re quite the jerk, Oliver Wood.”
-True statement. On both parts.

I love Bridget! I really love her. I'm not sure if I like her more than Libby, but I might. Jane needs an idiot enemy who is in love with Ollie.

Author's Response: I love Dodger. Like seriously love. And I think that chapter image is so perfect for him. It doesn't quite have the hair I want, but it still works :)

You're so right. Bridget doesn't know what she's dealing with in terms of a jealous or threatened Jane.

I love Bridget too. She's one of my favorite minor characters. And she's not going to give up :) Thanks so much!


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Review #36, by GaiapetHide and Seek: Bridget Lilion

21st July 2010:
Bridget appears! Another girl that I love to hate! Going to the World Cup- Best Present Ever! Plus kissing Oliver and meeting Liam and seeing Doger. What a lucky girl! George once again was impressing Katie with his fire skills. Until Fred actually lit the fire. Oliver's Quidditch Player Smirk. What a wonderful smirk. Much better than Fred and George's smirk. The sashes and tiaras part made me laugh! My friends and I got a set of them and make the birthday girl wear them all day on their birthdays. It stunk for the girls who have their birthdays during school, but it made the rest of us happy. I don't think any of us ever tried to burn them in the bathroom though. Ingenious. Liam makes his first appearance! He is much more enjoyable than Bridget. Even though she makes me laugh. Oliver is extra pompous in this chapter. I love it! I don't think he can help being pompous when faced with Bridget. I love this chapter, it is such a fun read!

Being unable to see did not sit well with me.
-Ha

I heard some more voices and then the distinct dialect of Russian. Did she take me to Russia? I didn’t speak Russian. Did she? Was it this hot in Russia? I would have to ask Lee.
-I love the way Jane's mind works!

“So he took it well then?”
She snorted. “If by well you mean he got George with a pretty good hex on the back and almost threw the coffee table through the door, then yeah.
-Of course he did. I might want to see Oliver throwing coffee tables...

“I tried,” he said. “Fred was watching those nights though and he set traps. Stupid git.”
-Good ol' Fred. Always taking advantage of any excuse to mess with Oliver

“Want anything, Jane?” Fred asked.
I shook my head. “Dad fixed me cold pizza for breakfast.”
“That sounds horrible,” said Katie.
“I requested it.” I beamed.
“You would.” Oliver smoothed out my hair and reached for an apple.
-My thoughts exactly.

She beamed and her teeth were very straight and white and for some reason I wanted to punch them all out.
Who was I kidding? I knew exactly why I wanted to punch them all out.
-Haha. Jealous Jane is not kind

Silly. What a twit. Did anyone even use that word anymore?
-Hahahaha! Jane hates everyone who likes Oliver. Of course she would hate Libby and Bridget if they were strangers on the street, but that is just because they are idiots.

Such a fun chapter! Doger is in the next! Yayness!

Author's Response: I love the whole Quidditch Cup deal. Everything you mentioned, including setting fire to the birthday details. I always have a plastic birthday tiara to wear!

I love Liam's first appearance in this chapter. And Oliver's extra-pompousness. And Bridget of course. But I can't exclude her.

I love the thought of Oliver throwing stuff all around the flat just to get to Jane to apologize. Such a cute image.

Thanks so much for the wonderful review!


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Review #37, by GaiapetHide and Seek: Birthday Blues

21st July 2010:
Happy birthday Jane and Alicia! I am not liking the rock between Jane and Oliver. It brings up bad future chapters. That was a pretty snazzy birthday breakfast. Hawaiian Pizza and a pink cupcake? Why not waffles or eggs or something? And then Jane gets a little power high. But hey, if I were magical I would make things fly around the room too. But I would not fix the wonky quilt that my amazing Dad made.

“How about that toilet situation?”
I groaned. “Not on my birthday.”
“That excuse won’t work tomorrow.”
“I was hoping you would conveniently forget about it tomorrow.” I smiled wide.
-Haha. She really loves cleaning... I don't understand why it would be so bad if she has magic, but maybe she is just against the idea of chores themselves.

I breathed out roughly. “At least we’ll be seventeen so we can just hex them for it.”
-Haha. Poor girls. Lucky that they had a pretty amazing present, otherwise I think the group would have some pretty amazing hexes on them. Maybe something akin to what happened to the Hexer of Danny Boy.

I thought about fixing the quilt, but stopped and forced my spellbooks to fly in a weird oval-shape around the room and then accidentally into a vase, sending it flying to the floor and spreading glass everywhere.
-She really is very talented with flying things. At least she can clean up the vase with magic.

“Where? To really-sodding-vague land? Because I’m already there.” I narrowed my eyes.
-Hahaha! I love this line!!!

Author's Response: I'm a big fan of pizza for breakfast. For some reason, I just don't really love breakfast food. Even though my favorite food is a waffle. Surprise? lol. I think Jane's the same way.

I would make everything fly around the room. It would be so awesome :)

I just think Jane is like I am...just don't like chores in general. They take me away from other awesome stuff :)

Thanks for the wonderful review!


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Review #38, by GaiapetHide and Seek: Flash of a Firefly

20th July 2010:
Great chapter. So well written. My emotions were all over the place! Alicia appears with a lopsided mouth. Again. Was that a hint that she would be with Lee? Poor Lee. He is so sweet and perfect for her but he had to go through all that. Bastians behavior in this chapter reminded me why I don't like him, even though he is a dish. He is pretty much an ass when he doesn't get what he wants. I loved the firefly scene! There was laughter and crying and I felt it all! So well written!

The twins were not too far to their left, catching fireflies by making weird noises and jumping out from behind trees. I doubted it was very effective, but it made me giggle nonetheless.
-It made me giggle too. They caught 8, so I guess it worked a little bit!

Bastian gaped at him for a moment. “You’re out of your mind. I want to give Alicia everything and you’re going to give her a sappy speech.”
I took Alicia’s hand in my own and squeezed it.
“I want to love her,” Lee said, barely above a whisper.
-Honestly, this part makes me cry every time. It may be one of the sweetest things that I have read. Bastian is a hypocrite by the way. What does he call that speech at dinner?! That last line! I cry every time! So sweet.

Not one of my favorite chapters but I think it is one of the most well written. Good job!

Author's Response: No one goes through my stories unscathed. Even Lee :) I'm glad you love his line about love too. That is straight from the heart. You can tell Lee has so much love to give, even if he isn't a huge star.

Thanks for the review!


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Review #39, by GaiapetHide and Seek: Hook, Line, and Sinker

20th July 2010:
Oh, Bastian, what a pretty chapter image you have! What a dish! Even if he is the cheesiest romantic ever. Poor Lee, walking in and seeing Alicia like that. I love Jane's revenge via toast! The Quidditch team seems to love the water. Or throwing people in it and splashing to be more exact. I loved that bit with the water fight!

“I don’t think I’ll ever get used to this,” Alicia said, groaning at Oliver’s gesture. “I just can’t get the image of them at each other’s throats out of my head. Fight or something, this is getting weird.”
“Perry, laps,” Oliver said and I splashed him.
-Aww, they are so in love and still theirselves!

Girls could do other things too. Like kick people really hard that made them mad.
Or get even.
-Haha. Poor Oliver didn't know what he awoke. Feminist Jane with a hard kick.

Leave it to Oliver to let his guard down to be pompous.
-Pompous git! How I love him

“Mr. Spinnet! Oliver won’t let me inside!”
He looked scandalized. “Tattle-tale!” he whispered, horrified.
“Why?” Mr. Spinnet called with an obvious mouthful of food.
“She won’t admit I’m right!” Oliver said loudly and my jaw dropped.
“Jane, he probably is. Just say it and get in here and eat. The corn is getting cold.”
-Ha! I love Mr.Spinnet! I'm glad he didn't help tattle-tale Jane. The two of them are so immature

He pulled me close and kissed me and I wondered what that had to do with the conversation. I figured he just wanted to kiss me. What a sod.
-Haha!

To be honest, I thought she was a bit of a sucker for all of it, but it was delivered with a heavy Portuguese accent so I almost fell for it.
-I know I would fall for it. I think anyone would. Umbridge would fall for it!

Author's Response: Bastian really is sexy. I feel bad for Lee too. A head's up probably would have been nice. As for the team loving water, could you tell ? haha. Yes, I agree with that. But who doesn't?

Jane does have many sides, and feminism is one of them :) With a hard kick!

Uh yeah, I'd totally fall for it too. Seriously. Sounds delish!

Thanks so much for the wonderful review!


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Review #40, by GaiapetHide and Seek: To Spinnet Cottage

20th July 2010:
Poor Alicia. Bastian is such a dish, but he just isn't for her. She is great with Lee. But Bastian deserves an nice girl. Put in a word for me? Haha! Oliver needs to get over himself for a minute and stop being a git. I think of all the foods in the wizarding world, Sugar Quills are what I want most. So George has dressed in drag...Is it a genetic quality? Did Freddie never have a chance? Riff-Raff. Eggs. I love how the owl is named Lemon. I don't know why, but it makes me very happy! Jane is not good at rhyming. Chicks before bros...

“But anyway—Jane plays Quidditch! Surprise, right? Oh, and she’s dating Oliver now. Dishy. Drama. Katie’s engaged. Quit talking about me!”
-Smooth Alicia. I love her. She is my favorite of the girls other than Jane!

I would never get tired of using that word. It was like a new piece of my Oliver-dating personality. It made me feel strangely dangerous. Like I was going to walk down a dark alley in London and stab someone all while not flossing my teeth.
-Haha! Such a funny bit! Look out world, Jane isn't flossing in dark alleys!

“Oh, yeah, because nothing could transition into Oh Holy Hell, I got an offer to play Quidditch professionally!” I said roughly.
-Oh blunt Jane, how I love you. Funny line!

“Ang!” he said, obviously not trying to be too eager, but giving that up completely when she nearly tackled him in a hug. They were snogging in under ten seconds.
-Is that a new record that they can keep breaking themselves?

Love all the Alicia in these chapters!

Author's Response: I agree. I think Bastian deserves someone nice, but someone quieter and more reserved than Alicia. I'll put in a word for you, for sure.

Freddie never had a chance, it's totally genetic. Totally.

I think that's a new record. The pair of them are ace at snogging. I mean, they had the snog record after all.

Thanks so much!


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Review #41, by GaiapetHide and Seek: An Awkward, Sexy Conversation

17th July 2010:
Hm...I really have no idea what Lee and Alicia are going to do...If only there were a way to find out... Anyways, Oliver was shirtless or snogging Jane's brains out in this chapter. Surprisingly, I'm okay with that. I don't think I will get tired of it either. He is such a catch! Riff-Raff, Wonky Quilt, Red Wine. I really enjoyed this chapter. Almost every line made me laugh!

“What has you in such a good mood?”
“The weather is nice today.”
“You’re a bad liar.”
“At least I know you got that trait from me.” He smiled again, this time a little more maliciously.
-Malicious...They really are bad at lying when they aren't denying their lack of flying abilities. Makes them so lovable!

“Good morning,” Dad said with a cocky smile. I knew where I got my horrible sense of humor.
-Mr.P can be cocky and have cocky smiles! He just keeps going up and up on my list. They have the same sense of humor. There must be some eventful dinners in that house.

“Tell me, what are your intentions with my daughter? Arm candy? Whole body candy? Sex candy? Quidditch assistant? Girl you can use and throw away once you get all of your groupies drunk at your flat one Saturday night?”
-HAHAHAHAHA!!! I LOVE Mr.P!!! Great lines!

I, on the other hand, found this entire situation particularly hilarious. I almost kept a straight face, but when Oliver’s voice reached a pitch only dog could hear, I started laughing loudly and my fork fell into my ketchup.
-Jane, queen of torturing Oliver and failure at keeping a straight face.

I rushed across the room, tripping once again over my trunk that seemed almost strategically placed there so my shin could be injured, and threw open the window.
-Stupid trunk, it's out to get her

Perhaps that was what I should start. Rock collecting. Maybe there was a gallery or something in London that would display really wicked-looking rocks. Probably the museum.
-I think Jane would have a nice rock collection. She would find nice ones because she is attracted to shiny things!

And then me—well, if Ang or Alicia wanted it really bad, I would concede, but I figure I would be good too because I wasn’t crazy like either of them.
-HAHAHA! She should stop being so delusional.

“What is it? My devilish good looks? How I’m like an angel falling from the sky and I make your life so much better every day I grace you with my presence?” I beamed girlishly and he chuckled. “I bet you were thinking that I should become a professional Quidditch player and play for Puddlemere so we can travel the world together forever and get married on a Quidditch pitch—oh, Hell.”
“What? Realized that talking about marriage is the last thing we should be doing?”
I shook my head. “I realized I can’t be a Quidditch player.”
“Well, besides the obvious reasons, why not?” He seemed to be humoring me so I would continue to change the subject. Stupid boy.
“Because I’ve sworn to make your parents continue to think of me as riffraff,” I said and Oliver laughed loudly. “I can’t very well do something they would like, could I?”
He shook his head. “Of course not. No Quidditch for you.”
-Such a good bit! Makes me laugh for so long every time!!!
I love this chapter! And such a cliffy ending! I would have left a very angry review if I had read this when you first posted it.

Author's Response: I adore the shirtless Oliver and snog-fests. And you're so right. They're so bad at lying. So darn bad.

I think I love the entire conversation between Oliver and Mr. Perry. His sense of humor is outstanding. And with Jane trying to keep a straight face...so much win.

You probably would have left a very angry review if I was you! It was quite the cliffie. Sorry about that :) But at least you can read on! Which is always nice!

Thanks so much for the review!


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Review #42, by GaiapetHide and Seek: Janet or Juniper or JoJo

15th July 2010:
Yay Sequel! We get more Oliver! And Jane! And the girls! And the twins! And extremely dishy boys! And Mr.P! I love Jane's dad. He is pretty much the awesomest dad ever. I can see where Jane got her humor and sarcasm. I love all the speeches he has. It seems that he has a good balance between father and friend. Plus he can make wonky quilts! Is that a real life experience? Is there a picture somewhere of the wonky quilt? Poor Jane. Summer is always hard when you don't see friends. At least she will see more of them in future chapters. Red Wine! I love how Oliver has figures. Maybe he will bring them to the Alumni party and get Jamie into them. Jane once again has an overactive imagination. She sees a letter and thinks that Alicia is dying. Of course she needed a good excuse to open the letter...

I didn’t think Dad touched a thing. Oh, except my old schoolbooks from my first few years at Hogwarts. He sold them so I could have extra spending money since it was pretty obvious I’d never take a look at Standard Book of Spells Grade Three again. Unless I was going to use it as a means of boredom torture.
-Haha, boredom torture. That is the worst kind!

I didn’t want to be given the lecture again about how I wasn’t allowed to date until I was thirty-five that would somehow turn into how the Harpies were a horrible team.
-Such a great dad! I have a feeling that Jane has gotten that lecture quite a bit.

falling into Oliver Wood’s arms and into the craziest relationship filled with being thrown in the lake, running out on a fancy restaurant with ugly forks, and snogging in his dormitory.
-Good summary

“Oliver sent me the address to his new flat,” I said confidently, helping myself to an apple out of the fridge.
“What area of London is it in?”
“The shady area with all of the rogue blokes with knives,” I said casually and smiled with the puppy dog eyes.
-HAHAHA! I love this line!

P.S. By “whenever you want”, I mean now.
-Oh, Oliver. He just can't help bossing people around can he? Pompous git. With a sexy smirk.

Ha. Oliver was significant. And he was my other. I never thought I would think that.
Maybe that he was a significant prat.
-Jane is so cute! She always thinks about strange things when kissing.

Of course I didn’t have anywhere better to be. I had my own flat—Dad was probably done with his Godzilla-salad by now and we would watch television and maybe poke fun at the clothes some wizards wore when it was raining. Then I could go write an “I’m all alone, entertain me” letter to one of my friends that had siblings and a real life, then to go to sleep and dream about how the flowers on the wallpaper had the ability to detach themselves and laugh at me for how pathetic I was.
-For the record, that salad was disgusting. That reminds me of when my dad and I watch TV. We are so judgmental! That dream with the flowers would scar me for the rest of my life. It's like something out of Fantasia mixed with evil!

I love all the names starting with J! Mr.Wood has some creativity with names. Juniper...

Author's Response: I really love Mr. Perry too. He's one of my favorite characters. He just fits Jane so well as a father. No, unfortunately, the wonky quilt isn't from a personal experience so there isn't a picture unfortunately. Maybe I'll make one ;)

I love bossy Oliver. He's such a dish and a half and he can boss me around whenever he wants...just saying :)

I'm so glad you enjoyed this chapter. It's a great intro to the sequel and it gives you a little of Jane and Oliver. Thanks so much for the review! I loved all of your favorite quotes. Especially Jane's weird kissing thoughts. Thanks!


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Review #43, by GaiapetKeep Away: Breaking the Snog Record

14th July 2010:
Major love! Mr.P writes pretty fantastic letters. How great would he be as a dad?! I loved George's reaction to finding out about Oliver and Jane. So much for keeping it private when he yells it in the Great Hall. Ang's mothering was so cute and made me laugh. Its fun how Oliver and Jane are getting to know each other all over again and are learning how to be a couple together. Sweet. I feel bad for Libby. It must be difficult to be her. She is irritating, but I can feel bad for her. Mandy on the other hand is a wretch. So happy that Alicia took her out! Oliver is such a romantic when he isn't being a pompous git.

“It’s Scotland! It’s always cold!” Fred argued.
-Good point, made me laugh

“Angie, come on. I was just kidding. You don’t have to go swimming. You can just—you want a glass of water or something? Sandwich? Mountain range?”
-So cute! I wish she had said Mountain range, just to see what he would have done.

So long, in fact, that George ended up splashing them to get them to stop sucking face in the lake.
-They never did have a problem with PDA

That would require studying. And I’m about to graduate. Sod off, studying.”
-Lazy boy when it isn't about Quidditch or sabotaging Doger

He leaned closer. “What were you thinking about? About how good I look with no shirt, because I can’t blame you there. I think everyone out there was thinking it.” Oliver laughed.
“I know I was,” said Fred and Angelina elbowed him.
-Great mental picture. Let us ponder it.

“I’m glad the pair of you added the title because if not it would have just been Quidditch players with benefits.” She giggled and I hit her.
-Haha

“Speak for yourself—I’m half-surprised you haven’t called me a stupid sodding git or questioned my Captioning abilities.”
I made a face. “Well, you are a git and us dating doesn’t change that. I haven’t called you one lately because the snogging is so good.”
-Jane is so funny! I guess Oliver will have to keep the kisses coming if he doesn't want to be called names. Dang, now I'm thinking about Short Skirt, Long Sigh. Trying to stay in happy mode.

Only a chapter left! So exciting!

Author's Response: I would love Mr. P. He's fantastical!

As for Libby, like I said before, I do feel for her, though I think she really got herself into most of what she got in return. She'll learn, though. Hopefully. Maybe? Hmm.

He probably would have stuck out his wand and said, "Accio, mountain range!" And then hoped for the best.

I have noticed Oliver is rather lazy only when it doesn't come to Quidditch or making sure Jane is his. haha!

Pondering. Oh yes.

Awww don't think about that chapter! It's a SAD chapter! But then there is a HAPPY one so think about that! Or try. :P Thanks for the review!


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Review #44, by GaiapetKeep Away: False Charm of Cutlery

14th July 2010:
Squeel! Oliver is such a DISH!!! Love this chapter! Red Wine! I love Jane's wardrobe freak-outs! Of course she would be scared about blending in with the sky... I love how you bring things through a whole story like with the dedication to Quidditch Weekly. You are one of the few writers on FF that do that and I love it. I always get so excited when there is Red Wine or references to Alicia being a keeper. If you didn't notice that from my reviews. I love Oliver in this chapter. He is pompous, sweet, nervous, randy, and romantic. And the scene on the Quidditch pitch is so them. It is perfect for their relationship and really stays true to their personalities.

“Shut it! Jane’s trying to change the subject!”
-Great line

Snogging?” said Alicia, leaning over the side of her bed. “How was it? I always imagined Oliver to kiss rather well. He is rather popular with the ladies.”
“Pfft,” said Angelina. “He’s got his own fan club!”
“The Shriekers,” I said fondly, staring at the ceiling. “But yeah—it was…well, it was really out of this world. I thought my legs were going to give out.” Katie squealed.
-This is funny and really shows the girls' personalities, which have grown yet remained consistent throughout the story. I love how the girls are with each other.

“Good, because you two are sodding perfect together with your stubbornness and your tempers and your idiocy,” said Angelina
-So true!

“Is he out of his mind?” cried Alicia.
“Yeah,” said Katie, giggling. “Out of his mind in love with Jane.”
I groaned and rolled over. “You’re such a sap, Katie.”
-I love romantic Katie. I am such a sap like her!

“Skirt, Jane,” said Angelina. “The boys love skirts.”
“Especially from you,” said Katie, laughing. “I don’t think a day goes by that the twins don’t make some lewd comment about your legs.”
-How do the girls put up with their boyfriends being obsessed with Jane's legs? Is it because they are so damn cute and funny?

“Janey!” said Fred, plopping down into a seat beside Angelina. “To whom would you like to dedicate your Quidditch Cup win? I’ve decided to dedicate mine to the skirt you’re wearing today.”
-HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

“Well, you could have told us at the party,” said Alicia, “except you were off snogging more important things.”
-Alicia is so subtle.

My face colored instantly. “Have I ever been nervous at anything?” I said wildly, glancing around to see if there were drums I could beat or something.
-Random thought. Makes me laugh.

We were talking about forks. On our date. On our romantic date.
I groaned.
“So,” I ventured, trying to recapture the conversation, “the weather is rather nice now that it’s Spring, huh?”
And then the weather. Great.
I should have just gone back to forks. Perhaps the spoons were worthy of a few snippets.
-Best conversation ever! Or way up there. Sooo awkward! She really is quite a Casanova. Good thing Wood got them out of there.

Author's Response: I've noticed not many people enjoy balancing stories around here, but I'm glad you like mine :) I don't incorporate everything into these stories, but I do incorporate some of my Creative Writing degree in. And balance is one of those things! Quidditch Weekly, Red Wine, brownies, Alicia as the Keeper, etc.

I am so fond of the girls. I have someone tell me that they need more personality, but I think they have just enough to both be their own people, but still be relatable and let people mold them into exactly what their friends should be.

Romantic Katie is the best. We'll see if we can get romantic Katie back...

I think the reason the girls can put up with the twins (and Lee) making the comments is because they know Jane is like a sister to them :)

I love their fork conversation. What a bunch of insanity worthy of dear Jane. Thank you so much!


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Review #45, by GaiapetKeep Away: After the Game

14th July 2010:
SqueelI Seriously-LOVE! Love the chapter, love the couple, love the girls! It's great that Jane realizes all that Oliver has done for her this year. I don't think he ever realizes it. Mr.P made his first real appearance and was awesome! I love him! Danny Boy is so arrogant! And skilled! Of course he saw it the moment he was wheeled out- he has some sort of snitch seeking superpower! Check out that unintentional alliteration. Red Wine! I love how instead of talking, Jane attacks him and starts making out with him. I wish I could do that. Sight. I love hearing Oliver's version of his feelings. It is great to know Jane's, but hearing Oliver's really adds to the story. The first time I re-read it after hearing his side of things, the story had a whole new interesting level. Plus it was very Oliverish. He tells her he loves her pretty much but manages to insult her and make fun of her while doing it. And that is what makes them great!

I paused. “No, because Oliver snogged me after he saved me from falling on my face.”
“NO!” cried Angelina. “Are you serious?”
“How could we not SEE?” shouted Katie.
-I love the girls. This is the perfect reaction. Makes me crack up every time!

Fred and George lifted me into the air with little effort (“I didn’t realize you were being serious when we caught you practicing your fall, Janey!” cried George)
-The twins...so amazing

“Eugh,” he muttered and I looked up. “The wine is all the way over there.”
“Where’s your wand?”
“All the way over there.” He cursed under his breath. “And I’ll be damned if I’m getting up.”
-Lazy boy

“Because…because…” I made a face. “Because I told you what I was thinking first! So you have to go first on this one! Ha!”
-So mature. Fast thinking though.

“Seriously? I didn’t realize. You should have made it more obvious and then maybe I would have broken up with him sooner.” I smiled.
-I love sarcastic Jane!

“I can’t believe you just said ‘pang of jealousy’,” I said, laughing.
-More ammo!

Love this chapter! Makes me so happy! Perfect way to bring them together!

Author's Response: You're right. I really don't think Oliver sees everything he actually did. But maybe it's better that way. Maybe it's a Mr. Darcy sort of relationship.

YAY Mr. Perry! Watch out, Alicia has her eyes on you. I loved your alliteration! Danny would be impressed, but he's running a restaurant right now.

I really like that Oliver section as well. Oliver is a very closed off guy and through this story you only get small glimpses of what he is actually thinking. One of them was when he shared his family story in the Astronomy Tower, and this is another. I wouldn't do myself the injustice of having a chapter in his POV, but I did want it told what he was thinking. :) Glad you liked it!

Sarcastic Jane + Pang of Jealousy = wonderful.

Thank you so much for the review!!


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Review #46, by GaiapetKeep Away: Here Snitchie, Snitchie

14th July 2010:
Great game! I'm happy you took a ridiculously (BTW, every time I hear that work I think of Ridikulus!(sp?) My friend and I say Draco's line from the movie every time someone says that word.) long time to edit it. Jane describes her relationship with Doger perfectly. It is a good relationship, but it was not meant to last. There is nothing wrong with it, but why would she choose that when she could have love with Oliver? Doger deserves true love! I love the idea of a double spread with Bastian. Maybe we can convince some fans to do some fan art of it? The issue would be sold out in seconds. I love the time-out. Ang and Oliver are having a face off while Katie kisses elbowpads (eww, but cute) and Alicia waves to Lee. Very focused team during time-outs. And then my Danny Boy! He is in a freaking wheelchair and he can still be super pompous! How awesome! When Oliver said "for you" I melted. And Squeeled. I love Jane bribing the snitch. Too bad it didn't work. Oliver caught Jane. And then he kissed her. I think I could join the shriekers based on my reaction.

When Oliver opened the locker room doors, the sunlight nearly blinded me and the roar from the crowd attempted to deafen me. It could have been an exaggeration, but everything I was feeling was for the first time and was therefore much more terrible than what Angelina or George were seeing.
-Good job using Jane's crazyness to describe the setting!

Oliver said he pushed off to the left, so I would fly to the right and try to stay away from his bad haircut.
-It seems that Jane can learn while sleeping! She must do very well in History of Magic!

I felt like he should have been staring at the Snitch, but maybe he thought I had great legs too. Damn those twins.
-I laughed and laughed.

There. There it was. Holy Merlin and all of his delicious pancakes it was right there.
-Best phrase ever! I would use it all the time, but I'm afraid that my friends would think that I went insane. Not that they don't already think that...

I love this chapter. So well done. Thank you for taking the time to write your stories!

Author's Response: ding ding ding.

You have it perfectly right. She liked Dodger. I think a part of Jane will always have a soft spot for him, but she never really loved him. She never would love him, you know? Heck, she didn't even tell him her dad was coming to the match! It just wasn't going to work.

We need fan artists STAT! Oh, that's such a good idea. Maybe I'll add that into the a/n for the next chapter, haha!

I might be biased, but Jane bribing the Snitch was definitely my favorite part about the chapter. So silly and funny. So very...Jane. And the kiss--finally! A real one! And then the game is over and...wait, what? haha!

Yeah, Jane totally got an E in History of Magic.

I feel like there are so many catch phrases that should be used in reality, that can't. Between that one and many of what James says, including Talking Slytherin, these are just gold. I use a few of them, though, but my friends sort of know I'm a little weird. A lot of them read my fics so I suppose that works!

Thanks! And you're SO welcome! I love writing and I love making people feel better. If I make just one person laugh or have a better day, then I'm doing something right :)


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Review #47, by GaiapetKeep Away: Oh Captain! My Captain!

14th July 2010:
One of my favorite chapters! I love the title! Reminds me of Dead Poets Society! Intense and full of emotion. Very well written. I love how Oliver got thrown out for shaking Ellis. And how Jane tries to get seeker powers from him. I did see the part about the replacement seeker, I don't know how I missed that before. I love Oliver's concern for Jane. It's like nothing else matters to him as long as she is okay. So sweet. Sweeter than drunk Oliver. Libby is really quite oblivious. She sees Oliver leave in the middle of the night with a bag of stuff and doesn't think she should tell anyone? What an idiot. I really felt like it was serious. I think you conveyed how serious it was when no one made a joke about Alicia replacing Oliver for the game. And of course Jane wouldn't be Jane if she didn't make a joke right after throwing up and right before playing Quidditch. WOOD CAME BACK FOR HER!

“But that’s not the point,” said Fred. “Otherwise, when we’re not beating away Bludgers and making ridiculously inappropriate comments about the length of your leggies, we’re here for you.”
-The twins really are great friends.

“We’re going to lose! I’ve seen her at practices! All she does is laps!”
“That’s why she has such nice legs,” said Fred, poking a few fourth years in the head. “Scram.”
-Being a friend and making ridiculously inappropriate comments about her legs. Some things never change.

A pimply fourth year gave me a nasty look and I stopped dead, irritated from my lack of sleep and the whispers that seemed to be following me now. “You know what?” I said loudly and she jumped, obviously not expecting me to speak to her. “I’m going to lose the game for Gryffindor now. Just because you gave me that dirty look.” She gaped at me and I stuck up my nose and continued on my way.
-Such a Jane thing to do. People really should know to stay on her good side. Otherwise they will get a heavy dose of sarcasm.

We’re going to go out there and demolish them, keep our pride, and win like a classy team just to show them what class is supposed to look like.”
-Now THAT is a pep-talk!

Have I mentioned that I love this chapter and the rest in this story? More than the others I mean. So well written!

Author's Response: I LOVE Dead Poet's Society. Why don't I own that movie? I need it. ACCIO MOVIE! CARPE DIEM!

I love how Oliver is being sweeter than drunk Oliver. Oliver in general is a very sweet boy. He just tries to hide it.

You're right, it was a very serious moment when suddenly they were all wondering if they had to go it alone without their leader. The person they wanted to kick out for a while becuase of his obsession, but the person they knew they couldn't do it without. Oh, Oliver. O Captain! My Captain!

I might have serious love for Fred Weasley. If you can't tell.

I'm so glad you enjoyed this chapter!! It's one of my favorites as well. Things are really starting to come together :) Thanks!


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Review #48, by GaiapetKeep Away: The Pressure

14th July 2010:
OMG the suspense! So many decisions being made! Libby is a persistent little lady. She never gets tired of fighting Jane, even if she never wins. Its good that the truth finally came out about what happened when Wood was drunk. I loved Alicia's reaction! So her. I'm happy that Ang and Fred took the next step, it seemed very right for them.

“Fred’s over here giving the table a fresh coat of saliva!” I snapped.
“I’m sure he knows this already.”
I gaped at him. “He knows that Collins flies slightly to the left on sunny days?”
-I just love this bit! So funny! Oliver is insane about Quidditch and this shows it quite well. Plus it is hilarious.

But chances are Jane will just argue with Oliver about something and get to leave early.”
-Lucky Jane. And it did happen! Pretty much the relationship between the two when they aren't snogging.

Without the food that The Three Broomsticks provided, I wasn’t able to stay awake and drifted off somewhere around their balance records and how Roger’s hair ruined his aerodynamics.
-It may ruin his aerodynamics, but it makes him very dishy.

things were getting better and I didn’t feel like punching him in the gut every time we talked (unless he was ordering me to do laps and then I wanted to punch him very hard indeed).
-I'm surprised she hasn't yet.

He had been happy ever since he convinced his team that they were prats and made them run laps for being lousy sports about the game.
-What a goose. Seems that he got a bit high on power! But a happy Doger is a happy me!

Love the next few chapters!

Author's Response: I just crack up at Alicia. And I do feel for Jane, because you know her...when things bottle up, they get released. In a bad way. Case and point: this chapter.

Oliver's insanity about Quidditch never ceases to crack me up. He is just crazy about it, but he really does love it. If Roger changed his hair, I'd cry.

She probably hasn't punched him yet because he'd make her run more laps. Thanks for the review!!


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Review #49, by GaiapetKeep Away: New Wallpaper

14th July 2010:
I love Lee. I think he and Alicia are good together. My worry is that he idolizes her a little too much to make a lasting relationship. He seems to ignore her flaws and blames himself for a lot of things. Bastian is a hunk and can read people well, but he is no good for her. Ellis was being arrogant again! Jane shouldn't thank him, his head might get too big and explode.

“Then they’ll know about our balance issues,” said George lazily. “Fred still has to work on his. He’s horrible at right turns.”
“That’s rich of you,” replied Fred. “Because you can’t dive to save your knickers.”
George punched Fred. Fred punched back.
-I love the twins. The rock my socks.

I wanted to throw a bear at him for forcing me into this—and I was still holding a broom I’d never flown.
-Really creative punishments. Where would she get the bear? Do they have them in the Forbidden Forest?

Alicia had decided to write Bastian her first letter on livid pink parchment (I had no idea where it came from since none of us had ever owned pink parchment in the past).
-I just love this line. Makes me laugh so hard. She probably stole it from Libby.

After happily finishing my essay some seconds later, I stuffed it in my bag along with my books, quills, and ink, and hurried down the spiral staircase right into the war zone.
I wasn’t sure how I always got myself into things like this. I just always seemed to be in a bad place at a bad time.
-Poor Jane, she always gets mixed up into these things. I love how the line about the war zone makes it seem so natural.

She still stared at him, dumbstruck. Her mouth was a bit lopsided.
-Alicia, what a girl. I guess Lee has a thing for girls with lopsided mouths.

I smiled. “I like them together,” I said suddenly and the girls grinned. “You guys have something like a trio going—the twins and Lee.”
“You don’t feel left out, do you?” asked Katie, concerned.
“Of course not,” I said, shrugging. “I’ve got Roger stinkin’ Davies. He’s the trump card.”
- Roger stinkin' Davies trumps all. Except for Oliver. But she gets him too! And Liam! Lucky duck!

Author's Response: I think you're VERY right about Lee. That is exactly what he does, though you can tell as their relationship progresses, he slowly stops doing that. He still loves her for who she is and puts her up on that pedestal, but he sees her flaws and respects her for being her. I like the progression of their relationship. It's one of my favorites actually.

Oh, yes. There are tons of bears in the forbidden forest. Literally. Tons of them. Their weight adds up to tons. Of course, they stick to the middle of the forest because they're actually magical bears that don't like the light and get their food from...yeah, that's all I have. It's late.

Out of all the people who would have pink parchment at Hogwarts, Libby is far up there on the list. I want to introduce Libby to Amanda. Random thought.

I really think Jane is lucky. It's the legs I think. How does she get the dishified guys? I'm jealous of her. Darn girl.

Thanks! xoxo


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Review #50, by GaiapetKeep Away: Brazilian Bon-Bon

14th July 2010:
I meant Harpies, not Finches. Anyways- this chapter was written so well! Jane has such odd thoughts while kissing. Potatoes, kittens, quidditch... I'm so happy to have Doger back! What a dish! Seriously, make farm team girl amazing. He deserves it. As for Mandy, take that you toad! Libby was an idiot as usual. Good thing Danny Boy was there to rescue Jane! And of course he did it pompously! I'm so sad for Oliver. It must be hard to have pangs of jealousy. Alicia is a keeper! Bastian- what a hunk! Alicia is such a lucky girl! Poor Lee, he didn't even finish his food. Katie is being a romantic again, so sweet! Yay Mr.P! I love that guy! I might pull an Alicia and add him to my hunk list! If only he were younger...

"I don’t blame her—her last memory of me was probably you screaming about how you wanted to decapitate me," Roger said fondly, patting me on the head.
"It was castrate actually."
-Jane has very creative punishments. So funny!

The twins shook their heads and Fred chuckled. “Not us, mate. We’re opening a joke shop. Lee’s going to work for us too. We might make him our personal lackey though.”
“With an apron,” added George. “A pink one. It’ll bring out the color in his eyes.”
-So funny! I would love to see Lee in a pink apron!

“Lee isn’t going professional,” said Fred with a grin. “He’s one hell of a commentator though. We should have him commentating what the customers do in the store!”
“Wicked idea—and he goes, he reaches, his hand LANDS ON THE HAIR SOLUTION! GOAL FOR THE BALD BLOKE!” George nearly fell to the floor laughing with his twin.
-That would be epic!

Author's Response: i figured you meant Harpies :)

And yea, Jane having those thoughts during snogging definitely means something! It means you're not thinking about said SNOGGING. I also love that Mandy is a toad. Definitely.

Poor Oliver and his pangs of jealousy. I really feel for him. Pangs are quite powerful.

You have a hunk list too? I fear mine is getting far too long.

I would love to see Lee in a pink apron as well, though it seems he isn't interested in the image, haha!

Thank you so much!!


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