Reading Reviews From Member: Prongs05JP
106 Reviews Found

Review #26, by Prongs05JPHogwarts Confessional: Prologue

5th March 2010:
Ohmygosh! I read the latest chapter you just put out (which I will review at some point xD) and then realised I hadn't read the prologue properly :O I think the person in the bathroom is James, as he's not mentioned. And I know this time is coming soon cause it mentioned Christmas and so did the latest chappie. I love this story. It's so original and really fab!
This prologue is so well written. It really gives you a feel for how bad things are and it really makes you wonder how they got there. But hey presto - it's great, really.
1000/10 XD

Author's Response: haha thanks :) glad you like it! more coming soon!

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Review #27, by Prongs05JPOnce Defied: No Calm, Just Storm

25th February 2010:
D: Nooo Mary and Lilyyy - no reconciliation :'( I feel like crying, but it's just one of those things growing up I think... see I have this friend, who's changed a lot in a bad way and I guess I'm a bit of a Mary because I bottle everything up to avoid a confrontation - because I feel if I had one then there'd be no going back. So I can sort of relate... although I'm not sure who I'm relating too xD

After ranting about my private life, I thought the way Lily took the Animagi news was quite creative: "You actually made me think that you were going to be honest, and then you come up with the most absurd story-" she actually didn't think James was capable of doing that xD I laughed a little at that - fab (:

Snape's a prat, so I'm going to applaud the Marauders on that one ;) (Inventive prank haha :D)

That fight was really well done, I have to say. The way Mary slowly brought herself back and then Lily brought up the topic slowly - but it is such a sad one, that. I know I've said this before - how the frienship is falling apart. One of the worst tradgedies of the story ):

I'm actually feeling a little good for Lily, for speaking up her own opinions - she's bottling up all her frustration about how her friends are acting and it's about time she let lose and made them think about Lily's own feelings - someone except themselves for a change :/ A little likee:

"Never cared?" Lily repeated. "Mary, how many times have I listened to and supported you in the last week alone?" - You go girl!

So another Fab Chap (and I do believe I'm up to date now xD, finally) so I finally get to say UPDATE SOON s'il vous plait!!

1000/10 XD

Author's Response: All right, I'm finally here to respond to this one! Sorry it took me a while between responses.

You're certainly right about Lily and Mary's fight being just one of those things that happens as you age. I don't know about you (well, okay, I suppose I do know something based on what you just told me), but I certainly wasn't friends with the same people at the end of high school that I was when I was 11. I'd say that it's fairly normal to change friends between those two ages. I think that especially as school comes to a close, people try to figure out who they are and what they want, and find out some things about themselves and the people around them that. Unfortunately, as it sounds like you know, that kind of change doesn't always bring happy endings. (Then again, it still has that capability--if nothing ever changed, where would our lovely protagonists be?)

I'm really happy to hear that you thought Lily's reaction was creative on my part! I was kind of hoping that it would be somewhat original (I don't think I've ever come across a story where she doesn't believe him/whoever else tells her, although I'm sure there are quite a few). But I really think that disbelief would be the only plausible reaction! I mean, of course James is smart, but becoming an Animagus is pretty difficult. It would sound ridiculous coming from someone who hadn't even left school yet. And also, I think James & Co. would have been pretty good at keeping things a secret (if Dumbledore and even Snape didn't know, why would anyone else?), so there wouldn't have been any previous suspicion of that on Lily's part--unlike the whole werewolf situation. Anyway, I'm really happy it made you laugh a little.

And then the fight...I'm also really glad that you thought it was well-done. I don't know if it's just my own personal preferences coming through, but I always find that when there's arguments in stories, they can very quickly become melodramatic and unrealistic--so if you think I managed to avoid those two things, that makes me feel great! :)

It's interesting that you say all those things about Lily, because in my mind, they could equally apply to both her and Mary, and I sympathize with both of them. Something I find really interesting about writing is that, more often than not, your protagonist will be the ones that your readers always sympathize with. I wonder where someone's sympathies would lie if I had written this entire story from Mary's perspective, for example?

Anyway, I'll come back down out of the clouds of hypothetical thought now. :P I'm glad my late updating at least gave you the chance to catch up on reviewing, since it probably doesn't have any other good effects! I'll try to update soon, I promise. I was hoping to do it this weekend, but that's looking less and less likely... :S

Thanks again!

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Review #28, by Prongs05JPOnce Defied: The Last Saturday In May

25th February 2010:
I'm hereee to reviewww :D I decided to do this thiang, where if I get a review then I'd make sure I posted one - just to keep karma at bay an' all that. And to my immense surpise I just got 5 reviews for a song fic I've done so I thought - finish the Once Defied which you are behind on :P and hereee I appearrr!

So this chapter, I thought the quidditch match was fab. F.A.B(Scott - haha, thunderbirds nerd) I mean, I could really believe it was happening! With all the stuff going on around - and the last second shot, a lil bit cliche but not so much. I do think it's great how Ursula (sp?) got it instead of James. That would have been tooo cliche xP

Quotee: "I only ever did that because I was hoping you'd come open the window for me." That line made me smile - so typical younger James xD I love the lil convos between Lily and James - they justt make ya laugh (:

And the 'L' word has now been said O: Completely unromantic, but hey xD That's very... Jamesish.

The wedding was pretty cool but just one thing - was there a ceremony? Or did that happen before Lily arrived? Just wondered, cause I didn't see anything about it. Oh no! Lily felt so awkward! It is absolutely the most horrible thing to have your friends parents use you as an example of what they should be like - I feel your pain, Lils! Dx

Lol, Lils gets the boucay (my spellings off abit today, no idea how you smell it (lol, smell) ) the person who probably wanted it least - also how it got thrown in the lake ;) What a thing to happen!

I wanna knoww, is there going to be any Mary/Remus, or is it unlikely that somethings going to happen - Maybe something for the sequell O:

A real Fab Chap (as always, your writings awesome by the way) and at somepoint this evening I will definitely review the next one. (Karma makes me do it ^_^' (not that I won't anyway) )

1000/10 :)

Author's Response: See, this is why I don't mind people reviewing later on...because then, all of a sudden, I get two reviews after having no new ones for days! :D And I really like your karma idea. In fact, you motivated me to review some stories I'd fallen behind on, too!

I'm glad you liked the Quidditch match! I did put some more effort into it than I usually do with those scenes, so maybe it paid off. There was a bit of the cliched win-at-the-last-moment-ness to it, you're right...but I'm glad I negated it a little with making someone other than James get the last goal. :) It would have been really hilarious if he missed and they lost, and I was almost tempted to do it...but then I realized I'd been planning for them to win all along, and it would kind of mess things up if they lost. Haha. :P

Oh, and I'm so happy you liked that little scene about the window, because I really love it too. I have it written out fully, and it's fairly adorable, if I do say so myself (although I don't take too much credit, because younger James kind of writes himself in a lot of situations).

Yep, those three little words are out there now...and definitely not in the most romantic way! But you know, you're right, that is kind of the "James" way to do it, and I think in real life, it's rarely said in some really romantic scene, anyway. That's for TV and movies (and maybe some books).

You hit the nail on the head about Lily missing the ceremony part of the wedding because of the Quidditch match. She couldn't take off when it was James' last game! Plus, I felt like it would be a little boring to add the ceremony part in. (Isn't it always more exciting at the reception in real life, too?)

As for Mary and Remus, since you've read the next chapter, you've seen what direction things have taken. :S So unless Mary has a complete personality transformation, things are...not good, shall we say. But that's not saying it will be the last word on things!

It's brightened my day to hear that this was a Fab Chap as well, and even more so that you think my writing is "awesome". :D I'm flattered!

Thank you so much for the two reviews--I have to run off quickly right now, so I'll reply to the second one later...but I've read it and I really appreciate all the comments! :)

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Review #29, by Prongs05JPOnce Defied: Defensive, Offensive

16th February 2010:
Here I am (ha thats a song I know) late again. I always think I'M GONNA REVIEW and then I just... don't... you should totally give up on me T_T But anyway - your A/N said we were getting towards the end D: Nooo!

Moving on, this chapter :D Of course James would be so hyped about the quidditch match over his exams - thats so... Jamesish. I like how James doesn't understand Lily about how she doesn't understand how he likes quidditch.. if that makes sense.. O_o

But hey - ha, those fifth years sure needed a lot of help! I wonder what James' boggart is >_< I'm really curious - maybe it was mentioned before and I didn't realise... damn! Oh well ;D
Quote tym: " "That went well," Remus said. James thought that he looked more cheerful and confident than he had ever seen him before. " Showing off Remus' teaching prowess (: And how much he enjoys it - or am I reading too much into that sentance? I tend to do that... ;)

The Diana Greengrass thing was quite unexpected - and then you tend to hit yourself and go "duh, of course some Slytherins are bound to be nice!" - at least I did. No one likes Nott she does Not have friends.. lala.. music.. ah, I shouldn't have had so much sugar with my pancake |D

Anna/Sirius (not a couple, you know what I mean) - ouch.
Ouchie. Oh boy.
Wouldn't want to be caught in that firing line.
OHMYGOSH MYSTERIOUS NOTESSS (i blame the sugar here) Does Remus really care about Mary? :O hurmm... O_o

Fab Chap (brackets do, as a bracket does... huh?) and I'm going to read the next chapter but please be patient with me when I review again *bows* I'm sorry! >_<

1000/10 ;D

Author's Response: Hi there! Oh, really, don't worry about being late in reviewing. I'm being quite late in updating, so you'll probably have loads of time to catch up. And if you don't, I'll still be happy when you do review! I never give up on reviewers...well, maybe if they hadn't reviewed for months, but that's okay. Life takes over sometimes, and I understand! :)

Yes, James' focus on Quidditch is probably not his smartest plan...but is is very HIM, as you said. And don't worry, your sentence there made sense to me, even if I had to read it twice. :P

And the fifth-years were definitely lucky to have help, you're right! You're not reading too much into that sentence there about Remus, either...I think it's a bit of subtle foreshadowing, for sure. :)

Yes, well, I haven't exactly been nice to Slytherins in this story, but I do recognize that they're not all bad, and even the BAD ones have their sympathetic points, too. That's one of the neat things about the books, I think--even the people you should absolutely hate have things that make you feel a bit sorry for them. Anyway, I'm glad you liked the part with Diana. :)

Yep, definitely know what you mean with Anna and Sirius' arguments. It would probably not be very pleasant to be around them at a moment like that. :P

As for Mary and Remus, you'll find out more in the next couple chapters! If you haven't read them already, of course. And even if you have, no pressure on reviewing immediately. I love to get reviews anytime at all. Oh, and regarding the end of the story, I don't know if I've mentioned it to you before, but I do plan on writing a sequel. So there may be a bit of a break in between the end of this and the beginning of the next, but rest assured that the story line will pick up again.

Thanks so much for the review! I'm glad you thought it was a "Fab Chap"! :)

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Review #30, by Prongs05JPHey, Fred: Hey, Fred

12th February 2010:
Beautiful. This honestly has been one of the most touching things I've ever read on this site! I was completely blown away by the structure and the ending - killed it. It's awesome the way you showed them getting older over the years and how George still talked to Fred - you had me in tears :'D Fantastic, I hope you write more!

Author's Response: Thank you! When I started writing, I was like how the hell will I end this without ruining it? And it just happened this way, and I really liked it. Thanks so much again, I really appreciate it (:

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Review #31, by Prongs05JPOnce Defied: Looking Forward

1st February 2010:

But I have an excuse. Sort of. You Want to Make a Memory (a story i've been reading for like, forever) finished and I couldn't bring myself to review it so then it ended up clogging my "to review list" so I am SO VERY SORRY.

Anyways, this chapter. Wow, Mary wants to be sa hit wizard. I was not expecting that! Well, I was a little bit because of that incident in the bathroom but with her personality I wasn't really EXPECTING it. Am I making any sense? I don't think so... oh well *shrugs* :)

Now my gen knowledge of the first Order, is that Caradoc Dearborn was in it, so I think they could possible have been talking about getting the Marauders to join up :O *shockhorror* or it could have been about James' parents. (What's wrong with his dad D:)

Loved the interaction with the Marauders - and I can completely relate to Remus' "don't talk about that - it's depressing" thing, as I am completely against change and I hate moving on xD

As for commenting topics, I actually do think the pace had slowed down a bit - after the climax of the two getting together - but it wasn't so bad that I didn't want to read it, etc ;) And I think interactions are fine :D

Fab Chap!

(get's it's own paragraph). I'm now hopefully going to review next chapter, so um UPDATE SOON after that ;)

1000/10 XD

Author's Response: Hahaha, we're living parallel lives--because these days I've been super slow with updating!! So, don't feel bad at all. I'm really feeling the strain of having a million other things to do, so I understand completely!

Ah, I'm glad you picked up on the hint with the bathroom scene. :) I know what you mean--it still doesn't seem like it fits with her personality, but it makes a little bit of sense given that she's getting a little more assertive.

I'll leave you guessing on the Dearborn conversation. ;) Sorry! But I think you could probably revisit this conversation by the end of the story and it would have a little more meaning.

As for James' dad, well, obviously, Harry didn't have any grandparents by the time he was left with the Mr Potter will have to go, at some point. :( He is getting on in years, and health just tends to deteriorate in those situations.

Yay, compliments on the Marauders! Fantastic! I'm glad you liked their interaction. They're finding their way into the chapters more often these days, which I think is a good thing. (Oh, and I agree--I'm not into change either. Well, unless life sucks, and then I'm all for it! Haha.)

I'm glad to hear that the pace-slowing hasn't bothered you too much. When I took a look at the chapters and how much time they occupied, I really did realize that things had been moving less quickly--not that I would have wanted to speed along most of those chapters, as they were fairly important ones, but still. If I kept going at this rate, there would likely be another ten chapters...and I don't know how on earth I would fill those up! :P

I'm so happy this was also a Fab Chap. :) Though please feel free to let me know if I ever write one that is less than fabby.

I'll try my very best to update soon! Agh, I hate school! Articles to read, Spanish tests to's driving me nuts. The chapter is half-written though, and I know how I want the second half to it's on it's way! :)

Thank you for reviewing!

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Review #32, by Prongs05JPYou Want To Make A Memory?: Epilogue

1st February 2010:
Wow. I know you must really hate me T_T I read it when it first came out (must be two weeks ago) and it just really struck me. And then I saw I got a mention and started crying - I haven't dared look at it since! I just... I can't really believe this is the end. I feel like pressing "submit review" for the last time would completely write off my connection to this story (does that sound weird?) and everyday I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Lol, I am a bit of a weirdo. There's so many things I want to say now that I'll probably end up forgetting some - I am planning to go back and review evverry chapter because, as I said, I wanted to read the whole thing over again - so I may just put at the bottom "epilouge-note-that-I-forgot" and you can laugh at how stupid I am xD
This story is amazing. I started reading around chapter sixty when I first started reading fanfiction - it's been my favorite and I followed it all the way (I created an account to review xD stalkerr) - it has just completely captured me.
The betrayal of Peter, the way their friendship was slowly twisted into a knife that seemed to cut them all away from each other - so much that Sirius wouldn't trust Remus, but at the same time wouldn't distrust Peter, how James was always too trusting, and how Remus could instantly believe Sirius was the traitor.
Hogwarts was amazing too. The way you portray the whole thing - I now actually believe the unique character traits (eg remus loves chocolate) that you gave them almost as if they were true! (This should so make best canon!!)
And out of school was inventive, how you helped Remus get a job like he would have, and how Sirius never completed his Auror training - there's no mention of him completeing it in the books (or actually haven gone at all). James wanting to be a Healer was nice, and I just loved the moments between Harry and Sirius!
There's so much more I want to say but the primary thing now: SEQUEL. Well, not necessairily (spelling... :S) but a Ted Lupin story would be great to see :)
I... er... don't know what else to say... have I mentioned how fab this story is?... uh... damn, I'll remember all I wanted to say later (typical *rolls eyes*). I'll keep following you (not like a stalker, but y'know) see what other stuff you do because you're writing is great! Honestly, it really is!
So, until chapter one, I guess this is Prongs05JP signing off... but muahaha >:) this is not the end :D so RESPOND TO MY NEXT REVIEW SOON ON CHAPTER ONE OR FACE MY WRATH (haha, thought you got rid of it, didn't you? >:D)

One billion/10 ;)

(ohmygosh long review)

Author's Response: No, I don't hate you! I feel the same way when I finish a story I really like (but I'm just way too impatient and have to find out how it ends, so I read it right away and then feel sad that there's no more left). Wow, now you're going to go back and reread? Well, I'm interested in seeing what you have to say about the earlier chapters.

Writing the whole downfall of their friendship was hard to do and so I'm glad you liked the way it went. And that you think a lot of this can be considered canon. I really tried to keep it that way, except for the things that we found out in DH. Though I did try to incorporate them.

I don't think the books ever say if Sirius did anything other than work for the Order before he went to Azkaban. I just pictured him as an Auror-in-training because it would be more ironic when he was arrested. Ahh! Sequel! *Runs and hides* I can definitely say this is my last chaptered fanfiction. You may get a one-shot out of every once in a while, but as far as chaptered things go, I'm leaving that to my originals (especially considering I've started writing one today).

I will respond to your next review on chapter one! I don't want to face your wrath (and I did think I could escape from it!) Thanks for reading!

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Review #33, by Prongs05JPOnce Defied: The Good Side of Bad

16th January 2010:
I just saw that you updated your latest chapter, I checked something and suddenly I was like OMG! I HAVEN'T REVIEWED LAST CHAPTER YET!! D: But I'm doing that now, so hah, take that demon lord >:) (dont ask me who the demon lord is, I'm just a but hyyper right now)

First off, I told you so!! You can't say anything to me, you stupid Marauders because I SAID it would end badly! Stubborn boys >> I liked Dearborn's reaction because he doesn't seem like the type to get really angry, but he still obviously was mad. It really showed how every single person has to do their job in a Marauder prank for it to work - as when they stopped paying attention for a second, Dearborn got in. *shrugs* it's their own fault. >:)

Lol. "we're twenty minutes late." "says who?" "you're watch." "it's broken." "liar." I lol'd. Typical Lily and James action, really shows off their personalities in such a simple thing! ("going anywhere with James was never a straight journey" xD)

Ah... we saw a side of Slughorn that I'm sure no one's thought about before. Always latching onto the achievements of others because he was never able to get anywhere himself - I really wanted to stand up and shout "BUT YOU'RE A TEACHER AT HOGWARTS!! YOU GO SLUG!" ... but I didn't. Because I'm sure my family would give me weird looks O_o

I like how James isn't so entirely "I'm gonna be an auror." But is more concerned whether he can do other things. Nice ;) Lovely little comment from Lily at the end there, too.

A Fab Chap!! (um... practise french, uh... nevermind, I'm rambling now xD) I'm now going to review the next one ;D

1000/10 XD

Author's Response: Hey there! No worries about not reviewing! :) You're here now, and that's all that matters. (Well, okay, I suppose other things in life matter as well. But right now your review is at the top!)

Yep, you were right--it didn't go well for them! Silly boys. I'm glad you liked Dearborn's reaction. I really wasn't sure if it was going to make sense, and if it was going to be clear that he WAS mad but was a little unsure of how to punish James. Plus, I don't think he really thought it was that big of a deal compared to how others might see it. Anyway, it's good to know it worked out all right. :)

Heehee, I'm glad you thought that little exchange was funny. It is pretty "typical Lily and James", now that I think about it...which is a very good thing!

You know, as I was writing the part with Slughorn, I suddenly got this wave of sympathy for him. I don't know why, but I just felt really bad for him...I started wondering about what he might have aspired to do in his own life, and how he ended up as this Potions teacher who's obviously so desperate for a little bit of fame and glory. Anyway, I just couldn't keep myself from including that little line there, to maybe give some kind of of explanation. I'm such a softy. :P

I think although there are things that would appeal to James about becoming an Auror, there are also things that wouldn't--some of them he's mentioned, others I'm hoping to explain in future chapters (not that they're some major plot secret, or anything). Now, what would be perfect for him is if there was something like being an Auror, but maybe missing some of those unappealing'll have to see if he figures that one out.

Ah, I missed the "Fab Chap". I told you I wouldn't get sick of it! :) Merci beaucoup for the review, and I look forward to reading what you thought of the next one!

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Review #34, by Prongs05JPYou Want To Make A Memory?: Crashing Down

11th January 2010:
I cried!! Oh my god, I cried so much! The last sentance is such a shocker "how the friendship that had once bound them together had fallen to pieces in such a devastating way" I am so sad - it's... it's completely the truth! But... I can't really think of anything to say overall at this point, but I will do my massive review after the epilogue. But I feel so... ugh right now. :(

What I liked (or not liked, you get the idea) about James and Lily's deaths was how vague it was. The way it just ended, with that they had no idea it was coming, and then James died. That's what I liked - how there wasn't some gory death or Lily screaming "nooo" Because everyone on this site should know what happens then anyway. No need to write it again. ;)

Sirius' blind rage was also a good thing too, and he had obvious reason to be so mad. Liked the thing behind the laughing, and Peter's so sneaky! The way no one expected it... D: It's so sad :(

I HATE PETER. I have gone through a complete transformation from liking him to hating him. That's all because of you! ;) And no - everyone knows they made the wrong assumptiom with Remus and Dumbledore, so much that everyones screaming nooo!

This chapter was brilliant, as always. It really broke my heart :'( I hope to see the epilogue soon, where I will do a MASSIVE review :) And as it will be my last chance - UPDATE SOON OR FACE MY WRATH >:)

1000/10 XD

Author's Response: That actually wasn't the original last line. I don't remember what it was, but it wasn't that. The one that's in it now is what came out of editing and I'm glad you liked it! I cried when I was writing this, so it's good to see the same reaction out of a reader. Ooh I like forward to your massive review :) The epilogue will be up on Wednesday and I'm indescribably nervous about putting it up. It's focused largely on the Marauders, but, I don't know... it's different from the rest of the story, in a way. Though I tried to tie it all together.

All that is due to JKR, who showed us the simply night at the Potters' home from Voldemort's perspective in DH. There was no glory to it, James didn't even have his wand. I guess most would expect them to have this big showdown, but in the book it literally describes James collapsing like a marionette and Lily does her heroic act of saving Harry, but it isn't glorified in any way. It was just a simple night turned disaster, and that's as realistic as it gets.

I had soo much fun writing Sirius in a blind rage. The laughing thing was really all from Sirius's disbelief that Peter could do any of that, that it was horrible, but so horrible it was funny.

That was the point - to make you love Peter and then bring it all down at the end :) They really did make the wrong assumption. If they'd refused Sirius's offer to switch Secret Keeper or used Remus or Dumbledore, they would have lived.

The epilogue will be up on Wednesday. And I just realized... this is the last time you'll threaten me to update or else I face your wrath! I'm sad now... Thanks for reading!

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Review #35, by Prongs05JPHow to tame a Marauder: Reconciliation attempted

11th January 2010:
Omg. I just looked at how many reviews there already are for this chapter - 52!!! XD I wish I got 50 reviews for every chapter... lol. Contradictory to Sirius' opinion in some aspects, I thought Laura was being very Lauraey (for want of a better word) in the respect that she was stubborn, and wouldn't give over to anyone else's opinion. At least that's the impression I get of her - once there's an idea in her head, there's no stopping it ;)

I'm glad Sirius managed to get through to her though, because being stubborn is more often than not considered a negative trait xD Haha... I liked the light heartedness there was too, especially "You know, someone who might want to touch him" I loled :) Otherwise this chapter would have been too depressing! Dx

Reconciliation Attempted, didn't exactly give me a good idea - I was thinking 'god, laura's just too stubborn' but they made up so yay :D I do feel bad for Bernie though... poor dude. I can see him having dual personalities, becoming super evil and trying to think of ways to split them up O_o But maybe I'm reading into him too much!

Anyways, great chapter. Loooved it, so I hope you update soon!
1000/10 ;)

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for the review!

Hmm. I feel that it always sounds big-headed of me to comment too much on number of reviews, but I will say that it's incredibly flattering that people think enough of my story to leave so many. I just have to set aside some time each day to respond to them now.

You know, you're right .. Laura was very much in character in that she was convinced she was right and wouldn't listen to anyone. It's been a failing of hers before and, like you said, stubbornness is not usually seen as a good thing. I think Sirius had a point though in that this particular idea hadn't had long to settle in her head before she started refusing to hear him out ... he had thought that there would be some more lead-in time, so to speak. But, like you, I'm glad that she agreed to hear him out and that he managed to get through to her, otherwise the next few chapters would probably have been torture.

As for the chapter title, well you're right, of course, but I didn't have much option - if I'd called it "Reconciliation" then that would have given away what happens even before you read it, so I was trying to be a bit cagey there. And Bernie? Well my lips are (of course) sealed.

Next chapter will be up before the weekend is out.

cheers, Mel

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Review #36, by Prongs05JPYou Want To Make A Memory?: The Traitor

11th January 2010:
OHmysgosh nooo! Even though I know what's going to happen - please noo! Don't do it Peter, don't do it - and Sirius should have more faith in Remus, (although Remus was sitting in a pretty big hole with a neon sigh next to it saying "DEATH EATER :)"
Ughh it really makes you think how different things could have been if Lily had spoken up her uncertainty, and told James she wanted Dumbledore as their Secret Keeper. Would they have surrvived? I'm almost sure they would have, to be perfectly honest. Good AU thing there xD
Oh no!!! Remus has been caught! This is really bad, like -- really bad! I wonder if it's Werewolves or Death Eaters?
From what I can see from the next time... not good :( Looks like its finally... I don't want to say it >_< I'll probably review that later tonight.
1000/10 XD

Author's Response: Ha, I just pictured your description of Remus and it's pretty funny, the big neon sign is pointing to him. Remus did dig himself into a hole, but Sirius and James should have had more faith in him. They probably would have survived if they'd had Dumbledore as their Secret Keeper. You'll find out who caught Remus in the next chapter. Thanks for reading!

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Review #37, by Prongs05JPYou Want To Make A Memory?: Falling Apart

10th January 2010:
Hokay, I humbly apologise again for not getting on with reviews... I know, I suck T_T But hey. first off, Remus is digging himself in! Why can't Dumbledore like tell them that he's away on order buisness but not exactly what he's doing and where he is? It's so sadd ): Christmas was nice, until Remus and Sirius started fighting Dx But what can Remus say?
What made me really sad this chapter, was actually the bit with James and Harry. How James was going on about "don't blow anything up, or you're mum'll go spare" kind of thing when actually neither of them are around when he goes to Hogwarts! It just... and the way he described Hogwarts to Harry with the common room and making best friends for life. It honestly is breaking my heart D:!!
And Peter. Well... Peter. I just really don't like that guy anymore. Although he is being quite clever, using Remus' situation to his advantage, but all the same... hateful
Sirius don't believe him!!! Nooo!!
This is a really good canon, because you've taken into account all the things JK mentioned in her books (ie sirius didn't tell remus about the change in secret keeper because he thought he was the spy and so on) So well done! Love it, although I'm sad we're near the end ): I think I might go back and read it all through again when it's finished xD It's just so fab! Updateee (although you have) or I'm running out of ways to say: face my wrath :D
1000/10 XD

Author's Response: You don't suck! Plot devices is basically why Remus can't tell anyone... Their Christmas was nice until the fight, which is actually the last bit of interaction Remus and Sirius have with each other for the rest of the story.

That was a sad part to write. I actually used my fic 'Walk Like A Man' as a bit of practice for that. It's sad to think none of the things James was talking about would actually happen.

Peter is clever, but not in a good way. He's really gone twisted and that only intensifies in the next chapter.

I try to keep everything JKR mentions in mind, though there was one bit about Peter that went through editing. I can't remember exactly what it was, but it was there. You're going to read the whole thing again? I can't even do that (though I am rereading my favorite Marauders fic, which is just about as long as this one). The epilogue will be up during the week. Thanks for reading!

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Review #38, by Prongs05JPYou Want To Make A Memory?: Distance

4th January 2010:
Awww together on christmas! That's so great :3 I'm glad Dumbledore let him go back - he really is a nice guy :D

LILY NO DON'T TELL PETER! D: nooo! But she will. And that's sad. Haha Sirius and Harry made me laugh. I hope there'll be more 'bonding' time between them - it's funny x)

Petunia is evil >:( How could she be like that to Lily - and to Harry. I loved Lily's "oh merlin, the poor kid" I laughed at that too. And Petunia could have at least hid her disgust >:( evill ladyyy D: I'd also like to add in a "Poor Remus!" here too :)

It's nice for the guys to be able to go drinking again - as Sirius says, it's the prime time in their life but they're stuck fighting a war ): poor them! Peter is starting to become quite mouthy when it comes to the others. I guess he really does hate them now...

And here's another HOORAY for Dumbledore who let Remus go back home for christmas. Update soon (well you already have but soon after that (: )
1000/10 XD

One more thing - did Remus discover anything?

Author's Response: Yep! Together on Christmas. Dumbledore really wanted the boys to be together.

Yes, she told Peter. There's not another bonding moment between Sirius and Harry, but there is one between James and Harry in the next chapter (I think...)

Petunia's a mean woman, that's basically it. That was the first reaction I could think of for Lily upon hearing Dudley's name. No, Petunia can't be bothered to hide her disgust.

Sirius is absolutely right, but they've been deprived of that. Peter does hate them and it's really sad. They used to be great friends and now it's all coming apart.

Hooray Dumbledore! No, Remus didn't discover anything. Thanks for reading!

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Review #39, by Prongs05JPYou Want To Make A Memory?: Making Some Changes

4th January 2010:
Oh, my, god, I am sorry AGAIN because I just thought I'd update later and suddenly THERE WERE 3 MORE CHAPTERS!! XD It's great that you're updating so quickly! Now, this chapterr...

It is kinda mean for Dumbledore to ask this of Remus, but I guess he doesn't really have any other choice. I find myself hoping he'll be alright out there (but I know he will be because it's not like he's gonna die :F) but you've really got me to think that this story could go anyway - even if Remus does live in the films xD

Nooo death eater attack on Lily and James! Nooo Peter is being evil againnn D: I liked the funny bit before that with James and Lily - really made me smile. And the attack was effective and James' reaction was good too.

I see next chapter how Lily says 'except you Remus and Peter' and everyone just thinks: NO DON'T TELL PETER! and waaah. But I'm looking forward to it now ;)

Great chapter, I'm going to read the others now xD
1000/10 XD

Author's Response: Yep three more chapters. I've got three more left before the entire thing is posted. The next one will be up over the weekend. I'm glad I can update faster now. I remember there used to be pretty bad waits between chapters sometimes, now it's easier to update.

It is mean, but like you said, Dumbledore didn't have a choice. He hates asking it of Remus, but he can't see any way around it. You'll see how the whole werewolf situation turns out in a few cahpters. I wish they'd let Remus live in the final film (I'll be busy bawling my eyes out when he dies...)

Yep, Death Eaters found the Potters. Peter is just an evil git now, and he's only going to get worse. That was a nice bit to write, it was good to just have them be parents.

Yeah, I was thinking the same thing as you when I wrote it. But Lily would tell Peter because she has no reason to not trust him. Thanks for reading!

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Review #40, by Prongs05JPHow to tame a Marauder: Back to school

4th January 2010:
Laura is still being stupid!! Can't she see how much Sirius cares about her instead of her stupid pride - her bitterness towards the others is also really starting to piss me off *steam from ears again* but that just means you're doing a good job of writing this - I always want to scream at the characters to do something. Poor Sirius :( I hope they make up when they talk. And I remembered something from last chap - the dog in the lane. Shaggy and black :/ hurmm... great chap, YAY so UPDATE SOON s'il vous plaittt :)
1000/10 XD

Author's Response: Hi again! :D

Ah, yes, you've got it, her pride is getting in the way here. And she never saw herself as a particularly proud person, but it does crop up every now and then. Sorry about her bitterness, too, but that comes wtih the broken heart. (That and, as someone else pointed out, she's hungry.)

As for whether they make up when they talk, well that of course is a closely guarded secret. Sorry!

Next chapter should be up on the weekend sometime.

cheers, Mel

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Review #41, by Prongs05JPHow to tame a Marauder: At the Potters'

4th January 2010:
OMG LAURA YOU ARE SO STUPID!! YOU ARE SO STUPID I MAY JUST DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT :L get classes in "understanding sirius's - the guide to when he's sirius and when he's not"
phew! what an unfortunate turn of events! and I must apologise on my part, for taking like three weeks to review :'| I'm sorry but anyway. GAH. I dislike you, although I'm assuming that something will happen to make things better. Hurmm? There better. This was a good chapter, and I think with the things Sirius said they could have been interpruted (sp?) in a good way but Laura being the way she is *steam from ears* The next chapter has just come out and I havn't read it yet - but I have high hopes ;) Bye until I review next chapter xD
1000/10 :D

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for the review!

Yes, she can be stupid. And she could really do with a crash course in that class you described - it would make matters so much easier. However, she's now convinced that she never really meant anything to him and she's taking it very badly. And yes, Sirius' comment could be taken in better ways, but that wouldn't have been nearly so interesting a read, now, would it?

cheers, Mel

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Review #42, by Prongs05JPOnce Defied: Sitting in the Trees

28th December 2009:
:O I can't believe you didn't tell me.. *sob* I feel betrayed... ah just kidding. Congratulations, Trusted Author! I'm glad you could get the chapter out to us before the new year :)

So, review time >:) I thought the date was written pretty well: it flowed, it all seemes to fit and I thought the bit in the park was really sweet (: I also thought the reactions of the boys when James mentioned where he was going to take her was quite good aswell - tch, boys!

James' shyness was also well done "Lily? Would you mind if - if I called you my girlfriend?" and Lily's reply was pretty funny too :)

I have only one criticism, (I rarely do, so bare with me xD) is James' reaction to the healer. The questions he asked his mum were pretty good, but I don't think James is the type of guy to just give up on it like that - althought that may be a side effect because he was so giddy about the date. *shrugs* I dunno, but that's just my opinion.

Overall Fab Chap! (haha.. that's gonna start annoying you soon (:< ) apart from my minor James-thingy I loved the date !! UPDATE SOON, now you're a Trusted Author, I'm going to have to start bugging you for updates MUAHAHAHA. Lol.

Happy New Year!
1000/10 XD

(there's also a bit when Lily said 'apart from their beaks of ccourse' there's two c's xD but oooh well I'm just being annoying haha (:)

Author's Response: Hi there! I'm very glad that I was able to get the new chapter out sooner, as well! Hopefully it made up for the betrayal. ;)

I'm glad you thought the date was good. This chapter is definitely not the one I'm most proud of, or anything, although I am very glad that it's being well-received and that everyone seems to find it sweet. And I had to throw the other boys in there somehow--I figured James' first date with Lily could hardly happen without his best friends throwing in their two cents.

I'm glad you liked the part where he was asking her to be his girlfriend. I really didn't want to leave them in some vague dating situation, and I figured James would feel the same way. And I thought Lily's reply was actually very James-ish in a lot of ways...I quite like thinking that his personality might be rubbing off on her a bit.

Ah yes, I thought someone might comment on the part with James and his mum. I think you're right that James is generally not the type to give up so easily, but you're right, he was about to go on a date. And I haven't been able to write about his relationship with his parents too extensively, but I really think that they were perhaps the only people whose authority James would listen to...and that's maybe why he was so rebellious when they weren't around. I'm not sure if that makes sense, but it's partly why I had him just give up there. Anyway, that won't be the last of that storyline, so hopefully it'll make more sense at a later point!

I do appreciate the constructive criticism, though--it really makes me think hard about the story and how I'm writing it. Oh, and thanks for pointing out that typo! I'm going to fix it as soon as I can! Not annoying at all. :)

Oh, the Fab Chap saying will never annoy me. :) I'm really glad you liked the chapter. I will try my very best to update soon! I expect the next couple will be pretty regular, but after I get back into school, it might not work out so well! :S

Thank you very much for the great review! I hope you have Happy New Year, too!

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Review #43, by Prongs05JPYou Want To Make A Memory?: The Eulogy

20th December 2009:
Aww... poor Remus. I like how you avoided the cliche there and decided to send him running from the church rather than doing the heroic thing. This chapter did make me really sad, and gives a great insight into Remus' not-so-childish childhood. I feel really bad for him
:( Bottling things up is never good. I was crying (as per usual) but my family was out, so I didn't get weird looks (yes *sob* yay *snivel*)

This review is really solemn, because honestly, it's not very funny (that's a good thing, a good thing!) but next chpater looks like we'll get back some light hearted humor that is not so common in later chapters (this is also good, because there's a lot more dark stuff and if you make it funny its bad ):< )

If you update during the break (I think trusted authors can?..) then DO IT because I wan mor - I wan mor! My wrath is too tired today, so yeah... happy christmas :)

1000/10 :)

Author's Response: Yeah I thought it would be something Remus may do. He's always had to be brave in the HP series, except for the time when he just ran from Tonks and the baby. It's really not a side we see of him, so I thought it would be fun to write. At least your family was out this time!

There's a light-hearted moment in the next chapter, but really there's not a whole lot of them from here on out. As of now, trusted authors can still update, the admin may change that. Happy Christmas to you too! Thanks for reading!

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Review #44, by Prongs05JPOnce Defied: Birthday Tea

20th December 2009:
It happened !! It really happened !! Now, I could be talking about several things here...

Firstly JAMES ASKED HER OUT ON A DATE AND SHE SAID YES AND NOW I'M HYPER WOOO :D Not much more to say on that except for the fact that it was completely unromantic and for once they didnt kiss before the date. Not that that's a problem, it was good :P

Secondly... a line I found funny - let me findd it... AHA! 'Lily opened her mouth in shock. "He bought a what?" "I think that's what it's called - I could be getting the name wrong, though." ' Haha.. James and is infinite muggle wisdom.. NOT. I think it's funny how he assumes he got the name wrong cos he knows nothing : D

Back to my first statement of review, the motorcyle incident in the prequel - I've never read the prequel, but I got the general gist of it when I looked up on it a couple of weeks ago on wiki. (long live WikiPotter, or whatever it's called xD)

so Fab Chap (that will never get old, me being immature) and update as soon as you can ! Happy christmas, and have a fab new year - see you in January!

1000/10 XD

Author's Response: It did really happen! Finally, right? And you know, one of the things that was in my mind as I was starting out with this story was that I didn't want them to kiss before they had gone out on a date. It might seem really weird, but I just felt like a lot of times the date comes first in real life, and very few stories ever showed it that way. So the result might be a bit anticlimactic and definitely less romantic, as you said, but I hope that it at least seems realistic! In any case, I think their date will probably be a little more on the romantic side.

Haha, oh James--he has been brought up in a pureblood family, so I suppose you can't fault him too much for not being sure. After all, Ron didn't know what a "fellytone" was, and his dad (who worked with Muggles) thought it was "eckeltricity". I always thought those little things were funny in the books, and I'm sure other wizards would have been similarly uncertain.

You definitely don't have to worry about reading the prequel to understand what's going on in the second half of the chapter, it just has a little more detail. To be honest, it's quite short and it raises a lot of questions--lots of people seem to think that the people who come after them in the alley are Death Eaters, and that the "shirts with the golden bird" they were wearing are somehow related to the Order. The Death Eater thing I could maybe buy, although I'm not sure why they'd be on brooms, but I have a really hard time believing that James and Sirius were walking around wearing shirts advertising a secret society. So I decided to see what I could do with making up a different back story.

The prequel is kind of funny in parts, I have to say that. The police officers ask them, "Names?" and Sirius starts listing off a bunch of random names, one of which is "Elvendork"...and then James says, "And what's nice about that one is, you can use it for a boy or a girl." :P So it's short and very open-ended, but funny.

Anyway, I will certainly update as soon as I can, and then everyone can read about their first date! I look forward to hearing another "Fab Chap" in January. :P Thanks for all the reviews--it was really nice to wake up and see some waiting! (Wow, this is a very long gave me so much to talk about!)

Happy Holidays!

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Review #45, by Prongs05JPOnce Defied: An Unexpected Invitation

20th December 2009:
So here I am again, five minutes after reviewing last chapter and deciding I should do this one too. Yes, I know - I'm fantastic, thanks for saying so (:

Rightt... so Lily's going to James' house in the holidays O.o I bet nothing will happen... jokes. Obviously SUMAT has got to happen, however mininiscule. (is that a word? Or did I just make that up...)

Another line I MUST comment on is Petunia's greeting. Loved it. "Mum's in a terrible mood because Dad flooded the basement." I actually laughed, and I'm not entirely sure why xD I guess it's just cause its something my own dad would do haha.. (:

So Fab Chap (haha) and I'm now going to review the next one (I'm glad you did get it out before queue closure - it made me happy :D)

1000/10 XD

Author's Response: You ARE fantastic for leaving these reviews!

Well, you've of course read the next chapter so you know that something did happen, although it was probably on the minuscule (what a weirdly spelled word--I thought it had two i's, not two u's) side.

I'm glad you thought Petunia's greeting was funny! I don't really have a basement per se, so I don't think my dad could manage to flood it...but the pipes did freeze once during the winter last year and my mum wasn't very happy that it took a day to fix. Anyway though, that's awesome that you could relate to it. I love it when I'm reading and that happens to me.

I was very grateful that the chapter got validated before the queue closure as well. It would have been terrible to leave people hanging for all that time! Although I kind of realized I might have turned it to more of a cliffhanger. Oops. :P

Thanks so much for the review!

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Review #46, by Prongs05JPOnce Defied: All Together

20th December 2009:
I am so sorry but recently I have been getting really lazy with reviews :/ The whole "I'll do it later" thing...(Procrastinators of the world unite!... later.) xD

Right anyways, I hate the way how everyone assumes a relationship will blossom between two people whop hate each other and how they're not allowed to just HATE. So I feel for authors when that happens xD

I do like the way they hate each other, exactly how I treat the people I hate too muahaha >:]... not that I hate anyone *shifty eyes*

No.. the guys shouldn't try and get their own back when Dumbledore said not to! D:... guys... geez (although I know what they try and do cause I've read it already xD) Well, fab chap, (should be a catchphrase or film or sumat: Fab Chap)

Now I'm off to review the next two chapters! Hasta luego, amigo!
1000/10 XD

Author's Response: Hi again! No worries about putting off reviewing. I'm often a member of the Procrastinators of the World Club as well, so I completely understand.

I think the thing about the love-hate relationships in fan fictions is that there were some in the actual books--Lily and James, Ron and Hermione, to name a couple--and they can be quite fun to write. You get to do the witty banter, and every interaction between the two characters is really emotionally charged. So love-hate relationships can be great, and they've been around in literature for centuries (even in Shakespeare!)...but then the problem is, as you've said, people start to assume that every bit of dislike between two characters can be turned into passionate love, especially where Sirius is concerned, I find. I'm glad you can relate to their feelings...or at least their hypothetical feelings, since you don't really hate anyone. ;)

Ah, yes, you're probably exactly right that they shouldn't try to get revenge. You saw what happened, of course, which you'd think would be enough to discourage them from trying again at a later point...but they can be pretty stubborn so we'll have to see!

I like your catchphrase--it's kind of got a double meaning going. "Fab chap" as in "fabulous chapter", of course, but then you could also use "chap" in the way that it refers to a person. I wish there was something quite as catchy for me to say..."Fab rev" doesn't have the same ring to it. :P

Thanks so much for the review!

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Review #47, by Prongs05JPHow to tame a Marauder: Christmas

20th December 2009:
There is no propblem with the cliche! It suits your story well, not like the whole UGH thats so CLICHE that you get with some stories. I knew Sirius would find a way, and I love how Laura's so shocked that there may be competition for her too xD (Sirius was very thorough with the shopping bags) I also loved how they actually talked in their relationship rather than just... doing other stuff that's not talking... O.o

Anywaysss, excellent stuff and I hope you can update during the queue closure as a trusted author :)
1000/10 XD

(btw, I wonder - are you going to continue with this after they finish seventh year or not =| ?)

Author's Response: Hi there! Thanks for another lovely review :D

Okay, last things first. The story ends at graduation, but there's an epilogue afterwards that tells you what happened after that. And that's all I'm saying there.

And thanks for being so understanding about the cliche, I know it's there but like I said it fit my story so I kept it. But like you said, I was hoping that it was an exception rather than a rule - I don't want my story to be riddled with them. I've already done the Yule Ball and the anonymous gift, for example, so I didn't want too many more.

And yes, they do talk. It's not all snogging. Though at this early stage of the relationship, it does get a bit mushy. Fear not, though, the constant snogging will end eventually.

cheers, Mel

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Review #48, by Prongs05JPYou Want To Make A Memory?: Old Life and New Life

16th December 2009:
Aaahhh noo! Not Mr Lupin! This is so sad, he shouldn't have gone that way! So that's how Harry got the name he did (well maybe xD this is fanfiction) This made me really sad watching them like that - but hey! It's not all doom and gloom, Harry's been born! Woohoo! I'm looking forward to James being a father, lol I remember when he was only a wee 11 yr old boy! Now I wonder how many chapters there are left to this story? Also I have some new suspicions - Remus is going to get really depressed and sad and maybe a little dark and moody, which is why Sirius suspects him of being the spy in the Order. Ha. Proud of myself for that one - UPDATE SOON or face my wrath - muahahaha!
1000/10 XD

Author's Response: Yeah, the Lupins bit it. I felt horrible doing that, but this whole chapter was planned out before I started writing this story, so nearly three years in the making. Yes, in my fanfiction world this is how Harry got his name. James is a good father. There's a scene between him and Harry in chapter 91 that I think is kind of cute. I can't give you an exact number of how many chapters are left, but it's almost over. My last finals are tomorrow morning, so I will be starting to write this again (I stopped at chapter 93 to focus on school and some other stuff). Remus is a bit moody and, combined with something else you will read about in chapter 91, you'll see why Sirius begins to suspect him. The next chapter will be up over the weekend. Thanks for reading!

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Review #49, by Prongs05JPYou Want To Make A Memory?: No Longer Boys

16th December 2009:
I am so sorry I have become really lazy with reviews - "I'll do it later..." etc. sorry! But anyway, I am reviewing now and I just have to say I was completely wrong about last chapter - lol "other werewolves" nope. :) But hey, this was a good chapter. What Mr Lupin said made me want to cry :'( Good chapter, I am no on my way to review the next one xD Sorry this isn't really in depth :/
1000/10 XD

Author's Response: That sounds like me with pretty much everything, "Oh I'll get to it eventually." Yay procrastination! Nope, not other werewolves. Mr. Lupin really had his moment in this chapter. Thanks for reading!

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Review #50, by Prongs05JPHow to tame a Marauder: Confessions

9th December 2009:
This is indeed the 'about bloody time' chapter xD Finally! Nice way of doing it, and they both really are quite stupid - I bet Remus ran away because of his werewolf issues D: I hope you'll sort things out between those too :( Or I'll be sad. But at the moment I'm happy :) And I'm looking forward to ways in which Sirius will definately find to visit her ;) and then trying to keep him a secret from her father xD

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for the review! :D

Yes, about bloody time. And yes, they're both stupid in a lot of ways - or, to be nicer about it, naive in the ways of relationships. But that's okay - we were all teenagers once (or still are, in some cases) and all teenagers are naive about relationships in one way or another.

Anyway. Yes, Remus ran away because of the werewolf thing - I don't think that's too much of a spoiler because just about everyone will work that out anyway. As for their future, however, I'll say nothing - you'll find out if you keep on reading. And with Sirius and the holidays - well I won't say anything about that either. That's coming up next chapter.

thanks again, Mel

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