Reading Reviews From Member: krazyboutharryginny
  
497 Reviews Found

Review #1, by krazyboutharryginnyBlissful Blossoms: Tea with Ms Applegate

28th April 2017:
Aw wow this was so lovely! It's strange that reading a story about a fight made me feel so warm and fuzzy ahaha.

Okay can I just note that I think Anise Applegate is a great name? Haha. She was really cool, I want to know more about her tbh. That she offered Hannah tea that very first time she and Neville had had a row really endeared me to her. She's obviously a very caring woman.

Aw Hannah and Neville's relationship was really so sweet. I like that you kinda flipped the flower-giving tradition on its head, as it's almost always the man giving the flowers as an apology in m/f relationships ahaha. And also that she wasn't giving him flowers because she was firmly In The Wrong, rather that they had kind of mutually had a fight and she wanted to fix it. That really made it a bit unusual and elevated it above the flower-giving trope.

I also really liked the part where Hannah started thinking about all the different ways her friends fight. Dean and Seamus in particular cracked me up hahaha. Harry and Ginny concerned me but I'm trying not to think too much into it since that's not what this story is about!

I'm glad that we got to see Hannah go back to Neville and see them "kiss and make up", as it were! The summer house is a great idea so hopefully that works out for them! Sucks about the garden still tho :( (I say as though they're real people... hahaha)

Anyways I really enjoyed reading this, great work!

-Kayla

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Review #2, by krazyboutharryginnySettling In: The Start-of-Term Feast

28th April 2017:
I must say, I absolutely love the thought of a Hufflepuff Scorpius Malfoy. I really feel like Hufflepuff is about as far away from Draco Malfoy as you can get, and I always want Scorpius to be different from his father and break away from his legacy. I really think that Hufflepuff is the easiest house for him to do that in, if that makes sense.

Man, thinking about his Sorting being greeted by silence like that... brutal. And people at his table not clapping or anything when applause finally did break out. I hope that his housemates will warm up to him, as he seems lovely from this first chapter. Very unassuming and open-minded, although still with a bit of a sassy tongue! Haha.

Aw, I like Kevin. His owl being named Hawkeye is brilliant! And he was so friendly, he was exactly what Scorpius needed in that moment I think. Just someone non-judgemental and in a happy mood. Scorpius didn't seem to mind him talking his ear off too much too, so it's easy to imagine that Kevin needed someone like Scorpius too - someone happy to listen and not judge him for being Muggleborn and maybe not knowing much.

Gosh, Louisa and her "little Puffies" talk had me cringing. I really can't blame Scorpius for his little outburst haha.

Really enjoyed this first chapter, great work!

-Kayla

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Review #3, by krazyboutharryginnyto the end of time: Should Have Said

27th April 2017:
Oh man why didn't I come back to this story sooner! I forgot how much I love the way you portray these two and their relationship.

God, I just had this horrible sinking feeling in my gut, only one paragraph into the story. Because I very quickly put together what the setting was (that they were in the Room of Requirement hiding from the Carrows) and what it was that Parvati wanted to tell Lavender... and what was coming...

When she didn't get out it I was devastated because when it comes to fanfics set post-battle it's honestly a 50/50 on Lavender being alive. I was so convinced Lavender was going to die without Parvati ever getting to say how she felt.

But you didn't do that to us! Bless you tbh. The amount of relief I felt when Padma said Lavender was going to live was ridiculous ahaha.

I really love the way you wrote Parvati, I felt like I was feeling everything she was feeling. Her emotions came through so clearly; the absolute desperation and then the absolute relief. The way that she couldn't even hear what her twin was saying to her and was struggling like that to get to Lavender... I think I was actually holding my breath. It was so well done.

Fantastic work! I really hope Parvati gets to tell Lavender how she feels soon cause after that close call I feel like she'll want to say it ASAP, and I want to READ it ASAP! Hahaha.

-Kayla

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Review #4, by krazyboutharryginnyTransylvanian Measles.: Transylvanian Measles.

27th April 2017:
Jailbreak

Oh, this was really sweet. I was expecting something to go disastrously wrong and Victoire to be running around everywhere sorting out chaos, but honestly I was pleasantly surprised when that didn't happen. It was nice to read about Victoire managing to handle everything so well when she was nervous at the beginning of the story.

We didn't see much of Hermione but I thought she was very well characterized, just kind of reeling off all the things she had going on and why it was such a bad time for the kids to get sick haha.

Poor Rose. It makes total sense that she particularly wouldn't like to get sick because of the loss of control that comes with it. I can sort of relate tbh. I really loved that at the end of the story she came to apologize to Victoire for being a bit crabby with her, and how nice Victoire was about the whole thing.

We didn't see as much of Hugo as I was expecting to when the story started, as it kind of became more about Rose, but I must say he was a VERY believable sick child hahaha. It especially cracked me up when she asked if he was hungry for lunch, he said "a little", and then he wolfed down his lunch. That sort of thing happens to me so often when I babysit, lol.

This was lovely to read, great work!

-Kayla

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Review #5, by krazyboutharryginnyBodies at Rest: A Midnight Call

27th April 2017:
Here for CTF.

Wow, so much happened in this first chapter! Poor George, knowing that his mother was going to die, trying his best to stop it, and having her die anyway. And being left with no one. That's so much for a little 8-year-old boy to go through :( and when you factor in his living conditions and the fact that his sister died, he's ALREADY been through so much. I hope things will get easier for him. And I hate the thought of him going "round the bend". I hope Harry will be able to help keep him on the straight and narrow.

Speaking of Harry, he was really great in this. I would expect nothing less from him than going to George's aid, and going so far as to volunteer to take him in after he was orphaned. I must say that I never particularly loved the idea of Harry becoming an Auror after all he'd been through by the time he was 18, but I always DID love the idea of him becoming a Defence Against the Dark Arts professor at Hogwarts, so I was really excited to see this story go in that direction. He seems to be insulted by the offer/Official Request but I think it'll be good for him to be honest.

These nightmares... I wonder if he really does just need a break or if there's something else going on? It really seems like there might be something else going on.

Since so much happens in this chapter it really hooked me in and left me curious to read the rest of the story, so great work there!

-Kayla

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Review #6, by krazyboutharryginnyThe Shadows Within: Prologue

27th April 2017:
Here for CTF

Okay so I think this is a really well-done prologue. There's so much suspense, as it's told from this non-omniscient point of view where the reader knows only as much as the characters (besides Voldemort) know. Which was really smart, because they're all in suspense and wondering what Voldemort has in store for them, which leaves the reader feeling the same way.

And the purpose behind calling the meeting is every bit as sinister as one would expect. Ugh, it's really scary to think about these people being in positions where they can influence (as-of-yet innocent) young people into thinking the same twisted things they think. Especially when you look at real life, how there's Nazi websites for children and kids being indoctrinated into such horrible movements. It really is just chilling to think about and I think this chapter had a really creepy tone to it that went perfectly with the subject matter.

And then, that last paragraph breaking into a more omniscient POV to reveal Voldemort's true, extra-chilling intentions. Actually, to know that he wanted to recruit young people to fight for him so as not to risk the lives of his more "trained" followers made me wonder about Dumbledore's intentions with the Order of the Phoenix...

Also, it was interesting that the Dark Mark tattoo is sort of an honour and not all the Death Eaters in attendance have one. I always thought it'd be something everyone had.

Great job with this prologue, it really makes me wanna read on!

-Kayla

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Review #7, by krazyboutharryginnyWith or Without Magic: Burned Sausages

27th April 2017:
Hey, I'm here for CTF.

This was sweet! I must admit, I love a good Muggle AU. This was really short, so it wasn't exactly a super in-depth AU, but I think you have is a healthy amount of backstory - that Sirius and Remus went to high school together and have known each other that long is about all of the backstory we need for this, and that little tidbit of Sirius being intimidated by Remus's father is the cherry on top :)

I thought this was very believable in terms for characterization, with Remus being more practical but still a bit mischievous (with his dry, sarcastic sort of tone and light teasing) and Sirius being a bit more lighthearted and a bit of a brat (but in an endearing way hahaha). I really enjoyed the way that the two of them played off of each other, it was, again, very believable.

I do have a bit of a critique, which is that I found it a little odd that Sirius/the narrative kept referring to Remus as Lupin. The first time it made sense to me and I thought it was cute, but I thought it was strange that he was never referred to as anything else, and it especially stuck out to me in the last paragraph when Sirius was thinking about his plan to propose. I think a few "Remus"s would be good :)

That said, I really enjoyed reading this and I thought it was super cute! Great work!

-Kayla

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Review #8, by krazyboutharryginnyActions Speak Louder than Words: Brutal Agony: Rose POV

26th April 2017:
Oh my god. "Such an emotional chapter" honestly feels like an understatement. This was devastating. I could picture it all so clearly in mind and honestly I really thought I was going to lose it and start crying. Albus especially got to me because his reaction was just so viscerally upsetting.

What really heightened the whole chapter was the tension. Rose needing to stay hidden and being prevented from immediately going to Selenia, and just the overall pandemonium going on around her, made the very beginning of the chapter so impactful.

Rose was so strong. That she was able to continue doing her job and go around to treat all those other patients was astounding. Not in a way that it was unbelievable though. You conveyed so clearly her state of total shock and grief. It just made me very impressed with her as a person.

There were definitely parts of this that hit particularly hard, such as Rose thinking about how Selenia had always had such bright eyes and now they were lifeless. It was just so horrible to come to that realization along with Rose that there actually was no hope, there was nothing to be done, and Selenia was gone.

This was so horrible but I'm very very impressed with how you handled the subject matter and made emotions come through in this chapter.

Great work!

-Kayla

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Review #9, by krazyboutharryginnyActions Speak Louder than Words: Blitz and Building: Rose and Scorpius POV

26th April 2017:
Whoa okay! That chapter sure was a wild ride. To be completely honest with you, by the end of the chapter I'd almost forgotten about the attack on St. Mungos. Not because it wasn't well written or engaging - it definitely was! - but because I was so excited about Rose getting to work at the Ministry in this new department!

But more on that in a minute! The battle scene was really well-done. I honestly struggle so much to write action scenes and I was really impressed with the way you did it. It was so tense the way you had it set up so that Rose and Scorpius were trapped in a room while a flood of Death Eaters poured in through the door... I can't imagine a scarier situation. It was definitely believable to me that Scorpius would be so extra-amazing at fighting because of being driven to protect Rose and the baby.

What an amazing opportunity for Rose! It works perfectly for so many reasons. She gets extra security just by virtue of her work place, gets to work closely with people she already knows and cares about, and is able to work in areas of Healing that she's passionate about. It was funny how she was feeling so much trepidation about Harry's proposal and it turned out to be so awesome! I'm very excited to see where this goes!

Great work!

-Kayla

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Review #10, by krazyboutharryginnyActions Speak Louder than Words: Baffled: Scorpius and Rose POV

26th April 2017:
Jailbreak

Wow. This chapter started out so lighthearted and got so dark.

Quick criticism: I found the POV change a bit jarring because it wasn't very clearly defined. I figured out there'd been a POV change very quickly but I just found it a bit strange. Granted I've jumped right in here so it's quite possible that's a clear standard for POV changes at this point, but I did want to make note of that.

Ugh I found Samara so annoying here. Honestly, it would really get to me too if someone so casually brought up Unforgivable Curses (USING Unforgivable Curses!) and justified it by incorrectly citing things that my family were forced to do in a time of war. Her blase attitude there went beyond annoying imo, it bothered me just like it bothered Rose. And also it really made me roll my eyes the way she was pretending she couldn't do basic spells, then complaining that she wanted harder material.

I hope everything is okay between Rose and Scorpius. That prophecy was intense and even though they've known about it for a little bit, clearly actually hearing it was a whole new level of intensity. It worried me that he Apparated away like that... I really hope this won't change things for them the way Hermione's predicting it will.

Quick little note, I really liked the quick mention of how Harry and Ginny seemed to know what the other was thinking. Made me smile :)

And wow, what an ending! Definitely leaves me wanting to read on. Poor Rose. That's horrible.

Great work on this chapter!

-Kayla

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Review #11, by krazyboutharryginnyActions Speak Louder than Words: Beloved: Scorpius POV

26th April 2017:
Here for CTF.

I'm really impressed with this chapter. So much happened but I'm not feeling overwhelmed or confused. I think it all transitioned smoothly and it was clear how the situation was unfolding. You managed such a big range of emotions too.

Random little note: my middle name is actually Rose, and I went by that for a little while in high school. The only nickname I ever got called was Rosie. Ro never even occurred to me but I think it's brilliant! Such a cute nickname. Maybe I'll steal it. Haha.

I thought the scene at the beginning was very realistic, where Scorpius was very nervous about where Rose had gone and was totally spiralling, to the point where he was thinking about how he was going to end up homeless. As someone with anxiety... relatable. Hahaha.

It was so clear how much Scorpius adored Rose. I thought you did a fantastic job bringing across the love that he had for her and how it really coloured the entire way he looked at her. I was so nervous when she said she had to talk to him privately and turns out I had reason to be. I thought she was going to break up with him but what did happen was worse. Again, you did so well with his emotions - the sheer horror he felt at finding out something so disgusting about his own family was palpable and I thought it was really realistic that he wanted to get away from her, feeling that he didn't deserve to be near her.

I thought the end scene with Ron was fantastic. So much realistic emotion from both of them, and it was so interesting how those emotions played off of each other, and how it was a confrontation but they came to some sort of understanding. And Scorpius got answers from Ron about his family, so that was good. Hopefully that can ease his mind a little.

Really excited to read more!

-Kayla

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Review #12, by krazyboutharryginnyThe Rise of the A.W.L.: Professor Blackburn's Secret.

26th April 2017:
Here for CTF.

This is a really good first chapter. We get a really good
introduction to the main characters (and reintroduction to
characters we already know, like Hermione), we get the
main conflict of the story set in motion, and we get some
intrigue and mystery around Dora and whatever went down
there.

Rose is great, I found her so likeable. And also very distinct
from Hermione, which was great - I have read fanfictions
where the two are practically indistinguishable, which I'm
personally not a fan of. She was clever and didn't like to
unnecessarily break the rules, but she was also kind of
sassy and had a strong sense of right and wrong.

I absolutely loved that Hermione threw herself into
defending Professor Blackburn (and Remus, too). It fit very
well with her canon characterization, considering how
quickly she began taking a stand (or at least trying to take a
stand) against Hogwarts's use of House Elves when she
found out about it.

I thought the articles and letters were really well done! I
particularly liked Alicia Spinnet's, it made me smile.

I wonder who Dora is and what's going on there. It all
sounds very fishy. I wonder what Dora's secret is, how she
and Rose found out about Blackburn, and why Dora would
tell? I'll have to read on sometime and find out!

Great work

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Review #13, by krazyboutharryginnyPeriphery: Chapter Three

20th April 2017:
CTF

I actually didn't find this chapter all that slow at all. I thought it was really well done.

The first half is so tense. I honestly was on the edge of my seat. I mean, it didn't seem like anything horrible was going to happen - it being the middle of the day in the middle of the hallway with loads and loads of people around - but Chloe was so tense and you did such an excellent job of capturing that that I was feeling it myself.

And then - Sirius. Even as he annoyed Chloe he was charming. I think you did a fantastic job there too, demonstrating his nature, or at least part of it, very well. Annoying, yet also annoyingly charming. And the sort of ease with which he conducted himself (Chloe thinking that he looked like he could've lit a cigarette in a practiced manner).

And Marlene was just wonderful! She made me feel so much better when she showed up, just like Chloe. She has so much life to her, she was almost sparkling off the page (well, screen :P). And Sirius isn't her boyfriend, hm? Interesting. Chloe was so sure about it.

I'm very glad she and Chloe are Officially friends now. Chloe definitely seems like she could use that sort of kindness in her life.

I enjoyed this chapter just as much as the first one, I'll have to come back and read this properly after CTF is over.

Great work!

-Kayla

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Review #14, by krazyboutharryginnyKeep Calm and Carry On: Take Two and Call Me in the Morning

20th April 2017:
Jailbreak

Ah, this was honestly so much fun! Setting your first chapter at a party (well, not a party, but at a bar where everyone's celebrating) was a very smart move. It gives you space to sort of naturally reveal quite a fair amount of backstory and information about your characters while also keeping the story upbeat and moving.

I really like your OC, Edie. She's relatable, what with being in her 20s and working a dead-end job while also interning, but I also feel like I definitely wouldn't confuse her with any of the other OCs from other stories I've read for CTF who're in their 20s working dead-end jobs. (Which is not to say that your character or story is unoriginal, but rather that it is!) I also feel like I'd like to know more about her.

Dean and Seamus were also great here. I particularly enjoyed Dean's commentary as he and Edie watched Seamus hitting on that girl. It was totally believable that this was a group of longtime close friends. And we saw less of Lisa but she was likeable too. It sucks that she and Edie seem to be growing apart. I've been there, as I'm sure a lot of us have, and it's honestly the worst.

This was a thoroughly entertaining first chapter, great work!

-Kayla

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Review #15, by krazyboutharryginnyIvy and the Art: Ivy and the Art

20th April 2017:
Jailbreak

Pansy Parkinson isn't a character that I usually have a lot of sympathy for. I mean, she's a pretty big bully in the books. But I actually really liked this story. And even though Pansy and Seamus is a pairing that I had pretty much never even dreamed of, I thought it worked very well here. Do I think it would be endgame? No, but I do think after reading this that it's a bit of shame this didn't happen in canon, because I think Seamus could have been very good for Pansy.

Taking Pansy and separating her from other characters like that, putting her against the wall with the ivy, was a very good move, as it allowed us to see a different side of her. Rather than the mean bully, we see her as an insecure teenage girl who's dealing with a lot of cruelty herself. And Seamus was very well-written here. I really like the thought of him being willing to extend kindness to someone in need even if they're a Slytherin, instead of laughing and walking away or simply ignoring her.

Your writing itself is great in this. Wonderful descriptions. My favourite was "And he laughed. It rose from deep inside his chest, spread its wings and lifted into the air as he leaned back. He was shouting to the gods and Pansy was staring. "

And that last line! Oh, it made me smile myself.

Really fantastic job, I am honestly in a little bit of disbelief over how much I enjoyed this story hahaha.

-Kayla

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Review #16, by krazyboutharryginnyBroken Crown: Chapter the First

19th April 2017:
Jailbreak

Oh, this is very intriguing indeed. I've read fics set after the second wizarding war, but usually they're set a few years after it ended. But this one seems to be set much closer to the end of the war, with less time elapsed. That seems like a very interesting space to explore - there was so much rebuilding to do, especially with the degree to which the Ministry was infiltrated.

This is certainly an idea I've never seen explored before - wands being taken from people with Death Eater connections. I always sort of assumed that, as with the first wizarding war, those who were confirmed to be Death Eaters or who were found to be knowingly helping Death Eaters would be sent to prison and that would be the end of it. But what with the Dementors abandoning the prison during the war, I guess it'd actually look a bit different, and from what we know of the Ministry in canon, I can definitely see them taking this measure.

Now, I'm assuming that this Miss Montague is the sister of the Montague mentioned in the books, and that he's the brother she mentioned. And she killed Crabbe? There's so many questions brought up by that, especially with the sort of matter-of-fact way she thinks about it. This chapter makes me want to keep reading and see what happens, which is of course what you want from a first chapter. I think you were very successful in setting up an intriguing scenario and character.

Alas, instead of moving on to chapter 2, I have to go continue jailbreaking! But maybe I'll be back sometime!

-Kayla

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Review #17, by krazyboutharryginnyA Happy Memory: The Swan

19th April 2017:
Jailbreak

Wow, I really felt for Cho here. You know, it always irritated me how unsympathetic people seemed to be towards her in Order of the Phoenix, treating her and her emotions like they were so confusing or an annoyance/inconvenience. She went through so much, as you clearly show in this story.

I really liked that, while there was obviously a big focus on Cedric here, that wasn't all that you explored. I especially liked the part where Harry suggested that she think about her parents to conjure her Patronus, leading her to think about how they treated her over the summer and how she had a disagreement with her mother on Platform 9 3/4.

I loved the description of Cho as beautiful, graceful, but fierce and protective. We don't get to see that side of her so much in canon but it does come out a few times, like when Harry is angry at Marietta for betraying the DA and she stands up for her friend.

I really liked how the scene Cho was remembering with Cedric during the Yule Ball started out as something that upset and frustrated her, and that she didn't think she'd be able to create a Patronus out of - but then at the end she found some strength within herself and was able to finally conjure her Patronus.

Great work!

-Kayla

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Review #18, by krazyboutharryginnyFade: Fade

19th April 2017:
Jailbreak

I think it was a really good call to take your prompt about the destruction of a relationship and write about that destruction from the outside. When you're in a relationship like that (as is explained toward the end of the story) you don't really see what's happening, so writing it from the outside gave it a clarity that I don't think would have seemed as natural if you'd been writing from the inside.

I actually really liked the way you wrote Daphne. She was so clear-headed and self aware, and seemed to really have her feet on the ground. And despite that self-awareness (knowing that Astoria was more beautiful and desired than her, knowing she'd been put in the room away from the party because her parents didn't think she was as good as Astoria, etc) she was remarkably free of anger/bitterness, and still clearly adored her sister. I feel like I usually see a lot more bitterness and resentment in that sort of situation, and I really liked seeing something different here.

Also, I really liked how you brought the idea of Daphne being kept in a separate room back into this at the end, I thought that was really clever and tied the whole thing together nicely.

This was sad but really well written. I hope Daphne will be able to get through to her sister one day and help her :(

Great work!

-Kayla

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Review #19, by krazyboutharryginnyWhen I Go Out With You: Fools Rush In

19th April 2017:
Hi Sam, here for CTF.

Man, I really need to read more F/F. And here is a great place to start with that project.

I really enjoyed this first chapter. It was so beautifully written. The way that you described Hannah's emotions, everything that she was feeling upon seeing Susan again, was really moving. To me, it was almost a little bit melancholy, because it had been so long since they had seen each other and the whole chapter had a sort of quietness to it.

It was interesting that Hannah's new feelings for Susan were, well, new, because the way Hannah described Susan gave me such a vibe of familiarity. I mean, obviously they were friends at Hogwarts, so there's that element to it, but the tone here just sort of made me wonder whether Hannah had had feelings for Susan while they were at Hogwarts and had been repressing it. Or maybe I'm reading too much into it :P

Either way I thought this was totally gorgeous, and the way you described the scene really got at how all-consuming seeing Susan again and feeling these new things for her was for Hannah. That's best exemplified by the line about Susan's voice being soft, yet resonating through every cell of Hannah's body. Another great example is "There is a light in her eyes that keeps me searching it is buried deep inside, beyond twists and turns, but it is there and it is glowing for me."

Again, I really enjoyed this and (assuming this isn't the flag story :P) I'll definitely be back sometime to read more!

-Kayla

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Review #20, by krazyboutharryginnyOnce upon a time: The good werewolf and the evil vampire

18th April 2017:
Ctf

So... I totally love this?! OMG be still my heart. Abbi mentioned a story about Sirius and Regulus as children in our CTF chat and I got all excited but I didn't realize it was this one! Okay I have so much to say about this (and I'm very tired so I hope it's coherent).

I absolutely love the way you wrote Sirius. Like I kinda mentioned in my last review, I tend to be a bit hesitant when it comes to other people's interpretations of him, because he's my FAVOURITE character. But I honestly thought this was dead on and I really enjoyed reading this. The way he was so snarky and tried to act kind of aloof and like he didn't care about Regulus, but really he was protective and perfectly willing to accommodate Regulus and do what was needed to cheer him up and help him go back to sleep... it was perfect and so true to my own conceptualization that I was honestly squealing.

I thought one particularly great moment was Regulus asking what "prejudiced" meant, and also pretty much showing that he was only prejudiced towards werewolves because his father said they were bad. It was sort of like foreshadowing for how the rest of Regulus's life played out, but if that was intentional it wasn't overplayed and fit in perfectly with the rest of the story.

Ugh I just really enjoyed this, it was honestly one of my favourite things I've read this round of CTF. It was so sweet and I think you did a fantastic job with both of these characters.

Great work!

-Kayla

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Review #21, by krazyboutharryginny1981: Winter

18th April 2017:
Jailbreak

I actually really loved this! You did such a fantastic job with each character here. Also, I want to applaud how you handled your format and your use of second person, because even though you didn't clearly denote whose voice each section was in, it was so clear and I didn't find myself confused at any point, so good job!

I want to say that the way you wrote Sirius actually aligned so well with my views of him, which is something that I pretty much never go into a general Marauders fic expecting. Especially the fact that he was so depressed and drinking because of Regulus. It seems to be a fairly popular view that he didn't care about Regulus or even hated him. But I've always thought that he still cared about his brother and would've been devastated by his death. So I was really excited to see that here!

I was also really impressed with Peter's section. I'll be honest, Peter Pettigrew isn't a character that I generally have much if any sympathy or goodwill towards. But you made me think about him with a lot more nuance than I usually do. I mean, you definitely didn't single-handedly make me like him (no offence haha). But I liked that you portrayed him as so horrified by what was going on around him, even as he participated in it. I just don't think it'd be realistic to portray him as enjoying the Death Eater's activities at all. He didn't join them because of ideology, but rather out of cowardice. Cowardice does not make one a sadist.

And James's love for his wife and son was so beautifully written and tender. His section really made me smile.

Fantastic work!

-Kayla

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Review #22, by krazyboutharryginnyIn between: The Sorting

18th April 2017:
Jailbreak

It was actually quite cool to see the whole first-year journey to Hogwarts through the eyes of someone who was raised in the magical world - mostly because it didn't seem to be hugely different from Harry's experience in the books! I really liked that Emmeline was still so awed by the sight of Hogwarts (both exterior and interior) even though she was raised with magic because it just really reinforces how stunning the castle is, and that it's not just cool for people experiencing magic for the first time.

I really loved the mention of Sirius's sorting causing the hall to go silent. It's funny, he's my favourite character but I had never really thought much about the actual event of his Sorting before. I can totally picture a silence like that happening.

It was funny that the four friends ended up in separate houses like that! One for each house. You know, in the books we don't really see very many strong inter-house friendships because there's so much focus on the Trio - so this fic kinda got me wondering how friends from other Houses hang out, since they don't have a shared common room! I assume that this story follows the friendship between these four so maybe I'll continue reading and find out your ideas about inter-house friendships!

Great work!

-Kayla

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Review #23, by krazyboutharryginnyThe first kiss is grand...: The first kiss is grand...

18th April 2017:
Jailbreak

Aw, this was absolutely lovely. Poor James, he was so flustered trying to figure out how to respond to Lily complimenting him and showing him goodwill. That was very believable to me because my impression of him was that he thought of himself as being quite a bit more suave than he actually was, and honestly that other people had that impression too, but that in reality he was a bit of a dork. So I really loved that you wrote him totally unsure of what to say and tripping over himself a bit.

I must admit that I was surprised when she said that she felt the same way and the two of them kissed. So I'm really glad you had that second section from her point of view, explaining that she's liked him for a while and her pride and fear of rejection were why she kept acting like she didn't like him.

Having that explanation/understanding made the final scene between them so adorable and, like Lily said, magical. Actually Lily's section was my favourite because it was just lovely. I loved the scene with her dancing with her friends, and also how she was sitting in front of the mirror and seeing herself totally differently. You did a great job of communicating how giddy and happy she was feeling and it made me feel happy too :)

I really enjoyed this, well done!

-Kayla

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Review #24, by krazyboutharryginnyTwo Lilies: I hate my name

18th April 2017:
Jailbreak

You come up with the most interesting AUs! This is definitely a concept I've never seen done before... someone with the same name as a Harry Potter character, living in a world (our real world, sadly) where Harry Potter is a book series - and a book series she's not fond of, for that matter - now that's novel!

I honestly do feel for Lily cause I can totally see how it would get annoying if everybody commented on your name like that all the time. Also, it's quite funny reading about Lily having all these sort of mundane teen problems. Obviously there's plenty of fanfiction out there where the protagonists deal with mundane teen problems, but those problems are set against a background of magic and Hogwarts.

Anyways, obviously (based on the summary) Lily's going to have much bigger problems to deal with soon! Based on this chapter I really wonder how she's going to deal with being sent back in time and ending up at Hogwarts. It really seems like she's the type to kind of freak out and lash out, cause she seems to have some attitude! But maybe ending up at Hogwarts during a time when everything's a bit grim will help her mature a bit and she'll return to her reality a whole new Lily, so to speak!

Definitely a very intriguing first chapter and story concept, leaves me wondering what will happen and how the main character will change over the course of the story.

-Kayla

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Review #25, by krazyboutharryginnyAll the truth about Jimmy Portman: The Hogwarts' Express

18th April 2017:
Jailbreak

Alright so I'm really intrigued by this first chapter. We've got this kid Jimmy going to Hogwarts, but he apparently is no ordinary boy and has a big secret, which his father is afraid will be found out. But it almost seems like only his father is aware of these things, because Jimmy doesn't seem at all concerned or like he's trying to hide anything. It really seems that he's not aware there's something he's supposed to be hiding. So I wonder what it could be?

Then we've got Ron coming and sitting with Jimmy, when in canon he sits with Harry. So where's Harry? Neville appears to have been chosen by Voldemort instead of Harry, based on Hermione's reaction to him, which means that everything is totally different. Harry could really be anywhere. He could already have wizarding friends and could be sitting with them elsewhere... he could even be dead :(

So yeah, this first chapter brings up a lot of questions and really makes it clear how much is different between canon and this AU. Neville being the Chosen One instead creates a vast new world of possibilities and it's cool to start to see those possibilities explored here!

-Kayla

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