Reading Reviews From Member: RonsGirlFriday
  
657 Reviews Found

Review #26, by RonsGirlFridaySuch & Such: A Story About Love (Among Other Things): III: With A Little Help From My Friends

10th March 2011:
Rita, I realized I have neglected this story for far too long! I know I've read this chapter before, but I apparently didn't leave a review. So what can I say, except "Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant!" Unfortunately, I can't really quote my favorite lines because they're all non-12+. XD But I love Penelope and Flopsy's friendship and bonding moments, Wood's driving (blasting the wall open was pretty wicked)...

You write with such natural, flawless humor. Penelope's narrative is just... ♥ I'm falling in love with this fic all over again.

xoxo
Melanie

 Report Review

Review #27, by RonsGirlFridayLittle By Little: Little By Little

9th March 2011:
God, Rachel.



Love, love, LOVE the repetition with all the various ages, over and over. I can't even describe what I like about it, but there's such a feeling of rhythm and poetry and cohesiveness.

And this line! I want it!:

It crumbles in his hand and he is twenty-seven and he doesn't know what to do, so he cries.

I just... ♥

There are no words. There just aren't.

xoxo
Melanie

Author's Response: Melanieee - this made my morning today, completely ♥

I'm so glad you liked that. I thought it might get overbearing but the ages are so crucial to it and people often brush over them and forget. It was really just my determination to get it to sink in!

You may have it if you like. It's one of my favourites in this too.

Thank you so much, lovely. I'm so glad you liked it.


xxx


 Report Review

Review #28, by RonsGirlFridayAll Things Life Must Be: All Of Your Joy

9th March 2011:
I'll be honest and say I'm glad you ended this with a squishy, happy feeling. :-D How adorable. And of course I love that you tied it in with Voldemort's defeat by baby Harry - it puts us right back at the beginning of canon! Dunstan wondering who the devil was Harry Potter made me laugh a bit.

This has been so wonderful to read. Your OC's are hands-down the best I have EVER read. And now that I think I have caught up on all recent Unsinkable stuff, I will promptly go back into withdrawals (seriously, have you considered the idea that nobody is ever going to get enough of this, and we're going to force you to keep writing Unsinkablicious stuff until you're about 90 years old??) :-)

Melanie ♥

Author's Response: It was a lot of sadness in this one, wasn't it? But it's wartime, so... And Dunstan and Gemma will be happy once they can let go of the dream of parenthood and let themselves have a new dream. At least they have each other. I had fun with the Harry Potter bit, because he's so famous at age 11, but no one would have known who he was before that day.

Thank you, thank you! I'm so pleased that you like my OCs. I'm pretty fond of them, so it makes me very happy (and relieved) when readers like them too. I hadn't considered that - haha! I figured people were probably done by now with this stuff. I've written so much in the Unsinkable-verse, but I don't think I'd ever really say I'm done with it. Maybe I should work on another one after I finish up Rose's latest adventure.


 Report Review

Review #29, by RonsGirlFridayAll Things Life Must Be: More Than Just A Memory

9th March 2011:
I love Siobhan to pieces. She's fascinating and so damaged. She seeks all these thrills that would normally make you think, Man, she's really living life, but when you acknowledge the fact that she does it just to get away from her problems and get lost in different kinds of excitement, it's ironic because she's really not living life after all. Her experiences don't really build her up, they just keep her kind of distracted and numb - that's how I read it anyway. I love reading her. And I loved the end of this chapter - it was actually very sad, but in a beautiful way.

Melanie

Author's Response: Damaged is really the perfect word for Siobhan. She's no less damaged here than she was at Hogwarts, and you're exactly right, she's still running away and not really living. Her adventures cover up her feelings and let her distract herself from really thinking or feeling anything. And you see she hasn't actually changed since Hogwarts - there she has no adventures, only boys, and here once the adventure falls into a lull, she immediately turns to a man. Poor thing, she's really messed up. I *do* have in mind a future - several years past this - where she can begin to heal, and hopefully one of these days I'll finish writing it.

Thank you so much!


 Report Review

Review #30, by RonsGirlFridayAll Things Life Must Be: Times Past Glories

9th March 2011:
*sob*

Where to even start? Reid's devastation, even three years later, is so palpable. What stuck out to me a lot was his attitude towards digging up the rose bush - in contrast to Hattie, whose first thought is that it's a very odd thing to do, in Reid's mind it makes perfect sense, and nothing will convince him otherwise.

These quotes are wonderful:

If only it said beloved wife instead of beloved daughter, so he could know that he still belonged to her, even when she was gone. Mad, he knew. She'd owned him, heart and soul, since he was sixteen. Maybe before, even.

He wasn't sure how he'd survived without Cecilia, come to that. It had to be because Hattie had told him he must.

"I miss you," he whispered, staring at Cecilia's roses, and Hattie, who always knew when to pretend she hadn't heard something, pretended not to hear him.

Seriously close to bawling right now. And I love the relationship between Reid and Hattie. It's gorgeous. I love it.

Melanie

Author's Response: Poor Reid. Yeah, Hattie is aware that he's sort of lost it here, but Reid isn't seeing it. Sinking into madness for a minute there, but Hattie will drag him back. It's what she does. Hattie and Reid developed sort of slowly through Unsinkable and WIW, and then in Over The Anvil, Hattie really takes charge of Reid. But never in a romantic way; they only ever were friends. I think it's good for both of them.

I tried to show that he had been getting better, but this was sort of a big set-back for him. He says to Cecilia that he hasn't been by for a few weeks - he's getting to the point where he doesn't visit her grave as often, which is good for his grieving process. Anyway, hopefully that made sense. As much as Reid's disjointed thoughts can make sense here.

Thank you so much for the review!


 Report Review

Review #31, by RonsGirlFridayAll Things Life Must Be: Not Yet Spoken

9th March 2011:
Ok, so I legitimately thought I had read this whole fic already, but I recently realized that was not the case! So I'm back!

I am always in awe of how perfect the interactions are between your characters, how everything you write flows like butter. Like buttah! And the amount of adorable constantly emanating from Arthur is going to kill me. In the best way.

I love the reference to how the Burrow was named. So cute!

And the end of this chapter was so heartbreaking. Poor Cosmo. It was written just perfectly.

Cosmo was one of those characters in Unsinkable who really just flew under my radar. I liked him of course, but he didn't stand out to me as much as, say, Reid (whom I want to *squish* and love forever). But the point of this is that it's really nice to just see a whole chapter devoted to Cosmo and what he's dealing with here, and that's what I love in general about this whole series of one-shots. :-)

Melanie

Author's Response: Yay! I love getting reviews from you.

Arthur is sweet, isn't he? lol. I love him. He's a great character in the books, I get such a kick reading him. So of course I love writing him too. Thank you sooo much for the comment on my buttah-rific flow! *restrains a squee*

I threw in the Burrow bit almost as an aside - I can't decide if I fully like that explanation, but it was fun to add in.

Cosmo didn't get a lot of screen time, but he's still part of the group, so I gave him a one-shot in this collection to show a little more of him. It's tough times for everyone, especially a Muggleborn like Cosmo.

Thank you for reviewing!


 Report Review

Review #32, by RonsGirlFridayThrice: Seasons

4th March 2011:
Rin, you're fabulous.

As I was reading this, I had this question in the back of my mind, why she didn't accept him the first two times. And then I reached the end, and I started to realize, as Teddy did, that nothing really mattered but the eventual acceptance.

What I really loved was their natural and familiar way of interacting with each other - the way Roxanne refuses him the first two times, with a little smile, and the way Teddy just sighs and drops it. And then when she finally does accept him, in the spring, kneeling in the flower garden, there's such an organic feeling to it. The changing seasons provided a wonderful backdrop for it, and your descriptions and imagery are gorgeous, as always.

Nobody writes poignant one-shots quite like you, Rin!

xoxo
Melanie

Author's Response: Gah, thank you, Melanie! You're lovely.

I was worried that people would get upset that Roxanne didn't accept him at first, so I'm really relieved that you "got it." And I tried to let him down as softly as softly as I could, and he still smiled about it in the end, didn't he? Anyway, I'm glad you understand. It lifts a considerable weight off my shoulders to know that at least ONE person gets him!

Melanie, you are lovely. Thank you so much for the wonderful, flattering review! I hope you have a spectacular day because of it.


 Report Review

Review #33, by RonsGirlFridayThe Love Drug: Lay Back and Think of England (or Why Cherubs Are Always Unadvised)

3rd March 2011:
Georgia, you constantly inspire me. You write the quirkiest, funniest stuff I have ever read in my life.

I love a good Marauders fic. And you can handle them because you do it in such a tongue-in-cheek way. I LOVE Love, Actually and Valentine's Day, and I am really looking forward to seeing you write in that style, interlacing stories and so forth.

Ok, favorite lines:

It was a Tuesday and Remus Lupin was trapped in the closet.

No, not that closet.


Snerk. XD

Has anyone told you that you have an obsessive personality?

I love it when Remus is written as a smart-aleck. Not enough people do this. I realize he was the most mild-mannered and levelheaded Marauder, but I also know he had some life in him, too.

And that was when James was forcibly ejected from the broom cupboard out into the corridor, stumbling out with all the finesse of a drunk being poured out of a bar.


You are perfect. ♥

xoxo
Melanie

Author's Response: Melanie, you flatter me - I don't know what to say! Thank you so much ♥

 Report Review

Review #34, by RonsGirlFridayWhere Our Echoes End: Tomorrow, Perhaps

3rd March 2011:
Oh, right, Miss Celeste... you go and write this... this... this wonderful THING, and you expect me to try to post one now? I would be so embarrassed. This is LOVELY.

Percy is charming. I mean, I already knew this, but YOUR Percy is charming. I'm just going to bypass asking your permission and steal him now. -stuffs Percy in pocket-

I really like your interpretation of Penelope. She is divine. She has been evading me for the better part of a year, and now I know why - she has been living in YOUR brain!

You know what? I'm going to steal this line, too:

We'd have been perfect together, if it hadn't been for us.

That is gorgeous. A simultaneously simple and profound statement. When you asked me my thoughts on why this ship didn't work out - that's it right there. You came up with the right answer, not me. :-P

I also liked "a thoroughly embarrassing lack of any sort clairvoyance." That's him to a tee. Someone very smart, and yet so very unperceptive.

As always, your writing is so real and natural, and elegant and ethereal at the same time, and flows beautifully. As always, you bring an extra layer of meaning to what is, on its face, just a random little scene between two characters.

As always, I am that envious creeper lurking in the shadows, trying to figure out how to steal little pieces of your brain...

XD

I love you muchly. But no, I'm not giving him back. Penny can shove it. And Audrey, and the trail of other unnamed broken hearts lying in the wake of his supreme ginger perfection.

But no, really - every time I read something by you, it feels like my heart has swelled to five times its normal size. By that I mean, your writing doesn't just make me think - it makes me feel.

Well done, my dearest!

xoxo
Melanie

Author's Response: MELANIE. You are softly killing me with these amazing reviews. Honestly, I'm wondering if a team of ninja elves skillfully kidnapped your keyboard and typed this out with you gagged to a chair or something, because that's the only logic I see in THE RonsGirlFriday writing such nice things to me.

YOU CAN HAVE PERCY. -pushes-
He irritated me very much when I was writing him and didn't at all feel like being cooperative until Penny and I absolutely made him! I did like Penelope a rather lot though, even if Percy/Penny was kind of doomed from the start.

-sigh-

Envious creeper BAH. Not true as I would pay my weight in gold to swap brains with you (in addition to versatile genius, I'd also know spoilers and whether or not Fred/Tibbs actually does happen...I'm still suspecting it, fyi. :P)

Whaaat? You must write yours! That was the deal! The concept was, "If I can write it, Mel can definitely do it better!" not whatever silliness you're saying. :P

With all that said, I am STILL on the look out for said (Audrey/)Percy/Penny, Casablanca style. Do it before I come after you with my horde of ninja elves to force you to submit.

But really, this review made my day, Melanie my love. :D

Much love,
Celeste





 Report Review

Review #35, by RonsGirlFridaySeasons of Discontent: Seasons of Discontent

1st March 2011:
My god, Susan. o.O

I didn't even realize at first that you had posted this! I recall discussing it in your help thread when this fic was but a little thoughtling in your brilliant mind, and I was drooling over the idea - because as much as I adore James/Lily, Sev/Lily will always break my heart, a wonderful and sad story of What If?

I was always one of those people who thought it entirely possible that Lily might have fallen in love with Sev (or maybe had already) if he hadn't lashed out at her and effectively ended their friendship. I know Snape is seen as mega-creeper and all, but a lot of feelings and emotions grow out of close friendships like theirs.

I love the themes at play here. Her naivete...her selfishness, even. Exploring this idea of life really not working out as she, in her always brilliant mind, assumed it would just because she willed it to be so.

And you've kept her in character - she's still canon Lily, just with a side that nobody puts in the fairytale version.

I actually felt very bad for James here. Like really, truly depressed for him. Even with Lily's attitude towards him - I almost want to say disparaging or disdainful - he came across to me as such a good person. Naive in his own way, obviously, but still good and so inwardly broken as a result of her choice to use him to further her own end. God. I want to *squish* him. And you characterized him in such a lovely way - not a caricature of himself - but lively and happy and pining, and then exactly the way I would expect him to be after coming to the realization he reached here about who he'd married. Quietly sad. It tears my heart. He almost shone more than Lily in this fic, probably because, while her actions are at the heart of it, it's the impact on James that gives her actions consequence.

Wonderful choice to do it in reverse chronological order. This is the kind of fic that reverse chronology is meant for - I think the impact is a lot greater than if it had just gone in normal chronological order. I also adored how you began it, talking about what this story is about. It was very effective - I adore that style in general, acknowledging that what you're doing is telling a story - and it had the added bonus, I thought, of easing the reader into the idea that this Lily is going to be different than we know her, but still the same Lily, and the ignorance as to her real motives has been entirely ours, since we've been suckered into believing a different version of the story.

Loved the literary references. Fits in with the references to telling a story. Makes it seem very classic and timeless, even.


A little idea came into her head, as though whispered into her ear by the tempting breeze that entered through the open window on her left. She listened to its soft, cloying words and fell prey to their power. The girl who had been, by all accounts, quite perfect, quite intelligent, quite brilliant for her age and background, opened her green eyes and thought about jealousy.

This was where it all began.


^ That is divine. It just felt...subtly wicked, I don't know. Delicious. Seductive, which went along splendidly with the bit about James putting his hands on her shoulders in a longing way.

Also, you string words together in ways I don't think my mind is even capable of. I hate you slightly for it. XD

She grasped at her memories with eager hands, sorting through the threads of many colours until she could pick out the one most lacking in colour, the one greyer than the rest.

For a moment he was someone else, too frequently an occurrence in these days of darkness, the endless mist surrounding them, ever hungry, grabbing at their heels, just for a single taste of the blood they scrubbed off the soles of their feet.

You are a freak, Susan. In the best way possible. A freak. ♥

I was so happy to read this. I think I'll read it again.

xoxo
Melanie

Author's Response: Wow. This is insane, Melanie! I don't know where or how to start responding to this review, so bear with me. XD First of all, a huge thank you, both for writing this review and for your help in fleshing out the original idea. I know that it emerged rather differently, but all the same, that discussion on TGS really helped me find a direction for my wild and crazy idea.

It's fantastic to hear that she's still a canon Lily, as I have, in the past, done evil!Lily, and the Lily in this story seemed pretty close to that, which was worrying me. I didn't want her to not be sympathetic or hateful, just a confused girl who couldn't sort out what she wanted and what she needed.

James is very sympathetic in this story, and my plot bunny was actually the expression on his face in the first part of this story. It started for me with him and, in a way, he is at the centre of the story - Snape isn't present except within Lily's mind (which is a crazy reversal of her place in the HP stories when she is realized in Snape's memories - she's real in those, not just a ghostly image), but James is always there, and it's crushing to imagine how aware he must be of his wife's feelings. How often does he ask himself whether she truly loves him? How often does he regret having married her? I suppose one could say that, in making Lily less than sympathetic, James became more so. I discovered that he's often forgotten or pushed aside in favour of Lily - like how people tell Harry that, although he looks like his father, he has his mother's eyes; it's always the presence of Lily in Harry that counts for more, except in Quidditch, of course. I see James as an "either way" sort of character - he's an idiot in the books, but again, there's no reliable portrayal of him, only biased memories, so there's the potential to do a lot with his character.

The "telling a story" introduction is thanks to you TGSers who helped me out - there was a discussion of Jane Austen and it stuck in my head, though I didn't carry it throughout the entire story. Like you said, I wanted to alert readers to how I wanted to tell Lily's story differently. You say it better, though, in that we've been lead into believing it from a particular angle. :D

The ending was so hard to write! I think the circumstances of the ending changed at least three or four times - there was a point even when Sirius would get involved, another where Snape would make an appearance, and another when it would return the story to the beginning and show a reconciliation between Lily and James. But when the current ending emerged, I couldn't resist that last image of the Lily who fell to temptation, who was still that perfect girl Petunia always complained about. Then the image of Lily's eyes came to mind - strange that they should be green, of all colours, isn't it? She's the girl all the guys seemed to have wanted, making them all jealous of one another, so I ran with that. :P It's like, throughout, the reader has had to peel back Lily's layers to reveal what's within her soul - it's a mystery story of sorts, in that regard.

I'm so glad to hear that you liked this ending, though. It makes me feel a lot more confident about the whole story, which was at first a disappointment because it hadn't achieved what I'd wanted. It's too dark and gloomy, and I think that it goes too far to deconstruct the good ship L/J, so I've been very critical of it, more so than I usually am, though the parts you quoted at the end contain images I really like, such as memories as threads - it really gets at the whole domestic imagery I wanted to bring forward.

Thank you so much for this, Melanie! You've really made me feel a lot better about this story, and I'm very happy to be the freak who wrote it. *huggles*


 Report Review

Review #36, by RonsGirlFridayCrown: camels and countesses

26th February 2011:
*JEALOUSY JEALOUSY RAGE STORM JEALOUSY STROP RAGE FLOUNCE*

Ok, Celeste. We need to have a talk. Seriously, every time I read something new of yours, for a moment it makes me want to admit general defeat and delete everything on my author page.

Why are you so amazing? Why so clever, Celeste, why? And what the devil goes on in your head that you're able to come up with things like this?

I realize a lot of this was based on the original Wonderland and the movie - but the way you wove in the HP characters was so clever and charming. Can I tell you how much I loved the (Sirius) Black Heir and the Mad Potter and Peter the mouse? It worked so perfectly. I don't think I could ever have thought of something myself, i.e. turning the Hare into an Heir (because Sirius is the Black heir - at least until he's disowned, anyway). And using all the female names from the book that are flowers, making them into the actual flowers in Wonderland - so charming.

You really brought to life the peculiarity and inanity of this girl's time in Wonderland - turning everything into riddles, and creating a general mood of confusion and wonder.

So when I first heard you say this was mainly humor, with horror at the end, I admit I was like, "How exactly does that work? It can't be done!" But it works here, because we start to realize what's going on, and when you finally hit the part where the Queen enters, and we realize who the Queen is and what she's done to Alice, knowing how Alice Longbottom was driven insane by Bellatrix - having that point of reference, it retroactively casts a horrific feeling over all the humor and oddness we just read, because what was a bit of lighthearted madness is now, we realize...just madness. And it's very sad.

So there are a couple of paragraphs towards the end - one where Alice is observing the Queen, and one talking about the mind breaking - that, first of all, I want to say they're beautiful. Everything you write is beautiful. But they're very lyrical and full of your infuriatingly gorgeous prose, and they are so very different from the tone of the rest of this story, which reflects Alice's naive, curious, bemused, childlike thoughts. Now, you being the excellent writer you are, I figure this was probably done intentionally, and if it was, you should ignore everything I'm saying right now. But even as I was realizing you must have done it on purpose, it did make me a little disconnected from the story for a moment because the shift in the tone of the narrative was the slightest bit jarring. But that is my only critique. ♥

I love - I repeat, I LOVE - that you tied in the part about Neville and the wrappers. I almost died. Seriously. And it's just some inane musings of Alice, about pigs and chocolate and wrappers being more nutritious - but taken in context with what we know, it's so sad.

So...humor and horror? You have achieved it. I kind of hate you, slightly. This is the kind of thing I read and I sulk afterward for half an hour wishing I could come up with ideas like this.

And seriously, man. Stop writing things I'm going to have no choice but to recommend on the forums. People are going to start think you're paying me off.


Melanie

Author's Response: - gurgles -

Um. Okay. How does one respond to this slew of undeserved flattery, Melanie? Is this because we're TGS-engaged? Hmm? Because no amount of flattery is going to let you off the hook from future nagging on Percy/Penny and such. :P

The Black Heir and the Mad Potter! I had so much fun writing them and the flowers, of course. :) I'm unsure of how to respond to this wall of wonderful comments, so I think I'll resort to doing what I usually do in such situations.

* plays tuba *

Those paragraphs near the end were intentional and meant to be jarring; they were a transition into the next concept of Alice's real madness, which couldn't've been done with Carroll's style (I tried - it wasn't as effective, unfortunately, and it didn't do much justice to her madness). But critique is good! It stems from a closer reading of this, which I'm beyond thrilled that an author of your caliber even bothered to do for someone like me. XD

That part was so last minute, haha. I'm glad you liked it though; I literally tacked it on as part of the final edits as I was rambling on.

You might hate me (though you have no reason to, I assure you; by that logic, I'd have been lurking outside of your house, ax in hand ready for swinging every time I read a chapter of Irrational or TMW), but I LOVE YOU and this review!

I so AM paying you off, though, Mel. I'm not sure how I'm doing it, but obviously I've been...like poisoning your mind or using voodoo dolls or the like (perhaps it's the tuba playing) because I am utterly undeserving of your recommendations or your kind words, but I adore them and squish them and save them in a little box forever.

That sounded creepy.

But nonetheless, ILY!

- Celeste


 Report Review

Review #37, by RonsGirlFridayHelp Wanted: Clandestine Food Shopping Can Cause Problems

26th February 2011:
Oh Annie. ♥

Have I really never reviewed anything of yours?? Fixing that problem now! I have been so intrigued to read this story anyway, ever since I first heard you talking about it!

So first of all, the hair-flossing bit reminded me of When Harry Met Sally, when they're comparing bad date stories and Sally says her date reached across the table, pulled out a strand of her hair and started flossing with it. XD

I thought this chapter had great flow, very pleasant to read. And from a technical perspective you are a very good writer, what with the grammar and punctuation and similar things that are sadly going out of style in today's world.

So in the beginning there, you were using the past participle ("he had done x" instead of "he did x"), and first of all I want to make clear that I really have no problem with past participle when it's done appropriately, which I think it was here. People occasionally tell me, "You don't need to use the word 'had'; you should take it out," but in some situations I think you really do need it - i.e. when you're doing what you're doing here, which is describing something that took place further back in time than the main narrative of your story, when your story itself is in past tense.

Ok, ok, so what's my point? Point is, I think you used it properly, but because you used it over the entire scene with his mother, it starts to feel...sticky. That's the best way I can describe it. Like after the fifth time you read that someone "had" done something, your brain starts to protest because it feels awkward. And I think the feeling was maybe aggravated because it was right at the beginning of the chapter/story. I think that could easily be remedied by just using a few contractions here and there: "He'd done x" and "She'd done y." It seems a little less formal and reads easier, I think - and you don't have to get rid of the past participle. :-)

Anyway, can I tell you how funny I thought it was when David slapped his hand over Frankie's mouth? I could picture it clearly in my mind, like a scene from a sitcom. Something spastic that a character like Ross from friends would do. XD

I love a good case of androgyny. Looking forward to reading the next chapter when it's posted!

xoxo
Melanie

Author's Response: Melanie!

I know we talked about this in the cbox earlier, but I have ALWAYS had an issue with my 'had's. Thank you so so SO much for pointing it out. I have a bit of a stigma when it comes to contractions, but I think you're right. This could read a lot more smoothly if I were to replace some of the hads with those.

I actually just watched that movie again the other day and I was like OH THATS WHERE I GOT THE IDEA, because it honestly wasn't on purpose. It was just one of those dealbreakers my friends and I always joke about, but really. Billy Crystal? Can't beat that.

And that bit with the hand. I cracked up when I wrote that because I could see it so clearly: David lunging across the aisle and then going AHH and jumping back. SUCH a Ross/Friends moment.

Thanks so much for reading this and for your advice! I'll definitely try it out.

lovelovelove
Annie


 Report Review

Review #38, by RonsGirlFridayHourglass Tilting: the sins of the minimalist

21st February 2011:
Oh my god.

CELESTE.

OH. MY. GOD.

-mind is officially blown-

In 21 parts! Out of order! And with the first line of each section matching the last line of the preceding one! How do you do it? It must have taken you forever!

The repetition of various lines throughout, all mixed around in different arrangements with other repeated lines, is positively gorgeous.

I was extremely tempted to go and read this in chronological order, and then I heard you chastising Gina and throwing soft objects at her for doing so, so I won't read it chronologically...for now. XD When I do, I won't tell you. But it flows so wonderfully the way you have it written, and even though a couple of times I was like, "Wait...what part is this? What's happening?" that's obviously a part of the reading experience, figuring out what's going on.

As to which Victoire this is about, I really have no idea. The fact that the third person Victoire says, "I'm always compared to you," sort of makes me think the second person Victoire is Weasley, because it seems like, with her family and all, she'd be the "primary" Victoire everyone knows, and any other Victoire would have to endure the, "Oh, you're Victoire? Just like Victoire Weasley!" But on the other hand, the pouty bit made me think maybe the third person Victoire is Victoire Weasley (not that I'm one to typecast her or anything). :-P

But aside from that, I have to say this: I know you had some fun making it sound like Victoire/Victoire meant some kind of weird psychological self-shipping, when in fact it turned out to be Victoire shipped with another Victoire. But a part of me is always going to read this as Victoire loving herself. I think it's a brilliant double meaning. I think YOU are brilliant.

And now for some favorite quotes!

This is the rhythm of your life in patterned breaths.

She is an ode to lesser gods. You are the lyrics sung by battered angels.

-swoon-

Before you meet, you are lost in the idleness of a world spinning in an axis of already justified means, constructed of imaginary axioms. You let the pandering crescendos of thoughts unwritten wander the cracked landscape of your adolescence and blew life into decayed dreams. This world is set in its rules, bent to the expectations of the men and women of a time before it. They offer your ears the flayed skins of bicentennial wishes and you listen, but when you meet him, he makes their law the liquid of poetry.

-drool-

However, I think my favorite thing to read, and the part that really blew my mind for the first time in this fic, was: "You wonder how to describe it - and then it hits you - it sounds like a book opening" - and then backwards!!! Oh my lord, it was lovely and chilling.

Seriously, dude. You are inhuman. Stop making us all look bad, won't you?



xoxo
Melanie

Author's Response: Oh my god. I put this review off forever because I have completely given up responding to something this big and beautiful and entirely undeserved.

Just know that this review kind of put me on a writing high and literally changed some things about the way I write. I'm lame enough to say that if I had a fanfic dream, this review is as close as I'll ever be to accomplishing it.

Really, Melanie, you have no idea what this means to me. Thank you, thank you.


 Report Review

Review #39, by RonsGirlFridayWeep for Him: and they will weep for him

17th February 2011:
I think my heart actually started beating faster as I was reading this. The imagery and tension and violence felt so alive (it wasn't even violent, really, but it felt like imminent violence, which I think is a much harder effect to achieve through writing!) You can pack such a punch into these super-short one-shots.

Some of my favorite lines:

There is no peace here, in this withered space of time and misguided fortune.

Like the weavers blades, sodden with the blood of falsified redemption, death will come, snapping its teeth and unhinging its mouth, prepared to swallow him whole.

Oh, and "he stands tall like the rose." Tall like the rose! What a concept. I'm still wrapping my mind around it, and the frightening part is, it's starting to make total sense. XD

I want a piece of your brain. Like just for half a day. (And not in a creepy Silence of the Lambs way. I mean to flatter.)

xoxo
Melanie

Author's Response: MELANIE!

hello sweetie, and thank you for such a wonderful review! *hugs*

i love these short one-shots. such a challenge to stick to the word count. i am glad you said that actually, about the violence being implied and imminent because what was exactly what i wanted to get across. i didn't wish to write his death, or the fight, just that little space before it, where he knew it was coming. he knows he will die, and he has to decide what to do about it - run or accept it as the inevitable and fight to his last moment.

i have no idea where that came from! i know people see roses are beautiful etc but personally, i hate roses. i hate the bush they grow on anyway - they are thorny and strong and out to get you (well the ones at my house are anyway, lol). i liked that he would take on those elements of a rose bush - that strength and determination.

hahahahhahaa no, you don't. seriously. it would scare you. i have strange things in my head...

LOVE YOU!!
Kate xx


 Report Review

Review #40, by RonsGirlFridayCherry Blossoms: Dawn

15th February 2011:
It seems like it's been so long since I've read anything of yours, when I finally went poking around for some new stories I saw this one and spazzed out momentarily. (Omnomnom Unsinkableverse!)

This just killed me, it's so beautiful and heartbreaking. Once again you inspire me with your ability to dig into human emotion and relationships, and bring them to life with your words, but without overcooking it into some kind of meaningless mush. I was so glad to read more about Hattie's character, in another era of her life and in the face of a new and more terrible kind of adversity. Her anger and grief were palpable. And even though the story was Hattie-centric, Molly and Arthur shine as always. Your interpretation of them is pitch perfect.

I really liked how you blended in the DH Ministry break-in, with all these characters trying to piece together what really happened while we as readers know the full story - another example of the excellent attention you pay to canon details, and how you really set your stories in the HP world, not using canon events as a mere afterthought. The effect of it is that this seems like a scene that could really have happened.

I can has more Reid, please? You have no idea how glad I was to see him lurking around this story. XD

Melanie

Author's Response: lol! Omnomnom. That was hilarious. It made me really happy though. I kind of miss writing the Unsinkableverse - I love Rose, but I was thinking I haven't written anything on these guys in like four months. I have some stuff on Siobhan I want to write. Maybe I'll get to that this spring, after I finish off with Weirder Shade of Midnight.

I am seriously ecstatic at this review - I am sooo pleased that you liked this story so much! I adore sorting canon details and events into the stories I've already written (I think it's been easier on me than on some past writers since I started my pre-Hogwarts stories after reading all the books), it always makes me happy to hear someone appreciates it. :)

Poor Hattie, this is a horrible time for her. Here's a backstage detail: I had originally intended to kill off Edwin as well. He was supposed to have died when Hattie's youngest was only about two years old. But then I started writing further and really wanted him in the story - and I thought it was too much for Hattie to lose her husband and her son. So he got a reprieve and I actually think the story worked better with showing how he is dealing with his son's death. I liked putting in a flash of Beatrice's grief for her brother, too. Hattie's very internalized at this point, like she's almost forgotten she's not the only one grieving. She's having the roughest time of it, though.

Did you read the Reid chapter in "All Things Life Must Be"? He gets brief mentions in other chapters, mostly the Cosmo one. The Siobhan stuff I mentioned above, he does appear in it. I need to finish that.

Thank you, thank you for this review! I loved reading it.


 Report Review

Review #41, by RonsGirlFridayFrom the Ashes: Burning Day

18th September 2010:
FIRST REVIEW?? Yes!!

XD

I am so excited this collab is finally being posted, and I'm really looking forward to reading all the entries. This prologue is gorgeous (coughGEORGIAcough), and a really great way to introduce the one-shots that will follow. Love the repetition, and the wonderful description of the phoenix about to rise from the ashes.

xoxo
Melanie

 Report Review

Review #42, by RonsGirlFridayHey Lucy: Can't Help Myself

5th September 2010:
Shiloh, this is GORGEOUS and I am in love! I especially love how you started it out in first person and then switched to third. It really works here - I think it's a great stylistic choice. I was so mesmerized by the first part, Lorcan's thoughts in first person. The descriptions and emotions are beautiful. I think the very first paragraph must be my absolute favorite in this chapter. I cannot wait to read on!

xoxo
Melanie

Author's Response: Thank you Mel! I was so surprised to open this up and find a review from you, I'm smiling so big the barista probably thinks I'm an idiot. :) I rather like the beginning too, when I first started writing this I thought it was going to be a no-dialogue piece like The Earth Beneath Us, but then the idea for the short-story just hit me! The second chapter is in validation right now :)

Thank you so much darling!
xoxo
Shiloh


 Report Review

Review #43, by RonsGirlFridayHarbor: Harbor

5th September 2010:
I really love this. I, for some reason, find Harry/Ginny immensely difficult to write, and I also haven't attempted a songfic because so many songfics come off seeming awkward that I'm afraid to try it. You've done both here, and I think you've done it really well. You used the lyrics sparingly, and they seem to form the background of the fic, so they're not really intrusive or jarring. And I think you've kept Ginny very well in character - not too soppy or overemotional. The mother-daughter moment was very sweet, as well as the point Ginny learned, which was that she had the opportunity to give some semblance of normalcy and stability to Harry's life. I think the reason I support Harry/Ginny, while it's not my number one ship, is because Ginny is the person who can be his rock, and she can tolerate his moods as well as the dangerous lifestyle he has to have at this point in his life - though she doesn't necessarily have to like it, of course. So I really enjoyed this, and I didn't think there was anything wrong with glossing over the part where Harry arrives after the Battle of the Seven Potters. Their relationship was the focus of this fic, and anyway we already read the part about Mad-Eye's death in the series. Great job writing about one of the HP ships that I find very difficult to replicate in fanfiction. :-)

Melanie

Author's Response: I haven't written a lot of Harry/Ginny, and though I do love them (they are one of my top favorite ships) I did think they were harder to write than I'd expected. I'm glad you liked the way I handled their relationship here. Songfics are awkward, aren't they - this is only my second.

The reason I've always loved Harry and Ginny together is because I don't think anyone else could understand him the way she does. They have similar personalities, similar interests, and her experience with Voldemort, while not on the level of his, allows her to really see why he needs to do what he needs to do. Hmm. Now I wish I'd touched on that bit in the story. Might have to write something new there.

Anyway, thank you so much for the lovely review! I really appreciate it. :)

Megan


 Report Review

Review #44, by RonsGirlFridayAll Things Life Must Be: Come To Me Today

5th September 2010:
I'm always down to read a good wedding fic. I thought this was a good one for Petula. Her aggravation was so funny, as well as her mother and sisters' stupid bickering and general stroppy-ness, and the random little things like her niece eating a flower from her bouquet. I loved the sense of satisfaction Petula got when she saw that the color was bleeding out from the bridesmaid dresses and shoes. This was a really fun read.

Author's Response: I love a wedding fic too. Which is funny because I don't actually like attending weddings very much. Wedding receptions yes, weddings themselves no.

Petula's family was fun to write. Since it's from her perspective, she picks out all the things that annoy her about them and glosses over the good things they do. Petula does like to focus on the dramatic potential of a situation ;)

Thank you for the review!


 Report Review

Review #45, by RonsGirlFridayAll Things Life Must Be: Half the Clouds are Empty

3rd September 2010:
Do I even need to tell you how excited I was to see MORE Unsinkable-related business from you? I love the idea of a series of one-shots focusing on the supporting characters. It's nice to give them each a bit of spotlight, particularly for a character like Hattie, who is so quiet and proper and never really in the foreground of things (or at least, not the most prominent voice when surrounded by others such as Siobhan and Cecilia).

And how adorable, the way she and Edwin figured each other right out and then told Jack to bugger off. I cannot imagine anything cuter. Fantastic way to kick off this new fic!

Melanie

Author's Response: Oh yay! I'm glad you were excited lol. And I'm glad you reviewed! Hattie is definitely not as prominent a voice as Siobhan and Cecilia, but I do think she's an important character (or maybe I just like her). She and Edwin are kindred souls for sure. They really get each other.

Thank you so much for reviewing!


 Report Review

Review #46, by RonsGirlFridayAccording to Plan: Chuckles, Squibbles, and a Cat!

15th August 2010:
"I did your mum last night?" I said weakly.

Ahahahaha! Hilaro.

Can the two of them ever just decide how they want to act around each other?? They're so all over the place, and often for reasons I don't entirely understand - but I guess they're teenagers and they're hormonal, eh?

I LOVE the idea of Squibbles! What a fun idea for a WWW product! And how adorable is Fred? I love him. So excited for this Enchanted Pineapple (LOL) business meeting.

Melanie

Author's Response: ahaha, i'm glad you appreciated that. as i've said, i do love your mom jokes... but i don't think shiv can really pull one off.

yea, we'll blame it on raging hormones. i think it's that they both are kind of stubborn. shiv decides that she can't forgive him, james decides that they can't be friends. and they want to stick to that, but they can't. if that makes any sense? probably not. just stick with the hormones theory.

yay, i'm glad you liked squibbles! i enjoyed coming up with them. i needed something that adele would strongly disapprove of, and would fit with other WWW products.

this fred is SO different than yours, and honestly, i like yours better. :P
i don't really know what's gonna happen at this business meeting, but i guess we'll find out.

thanks for another lovely review!


 Report Review

Review #47, by RonsGirlFridayAccording to Plan: Flying Broomsticks and Un-Dates

15th August 2010:
Hmm, maybe I'm not liking James so much right now. Git. What is his problem? -fumes- I'll say no more on the subject.

Anish is adorable, but I'm inclined to agree with Shiv - just a bit too perfect. I did like the "What are your future plans" question. XD

My favorite jokes here were this line: "I suppose next you'll want to paint yourself and dance around a fire, or take part in their other tribal rituals." - and the part about Gryffindor having a trophy room while Ravenclaw didn't even have a shelf.

Author's Response: reviews! what a pleasant surprise.

haha, that seems to be the general consensus on james.

i thought anish was kinda adorable too! but as you said, also too perfect. i'm surprised that so many people outright dislike him.

i thought it would make sense that ravenclaw wouldn't be winning as much. :) and i think that even if they did, they wouldn't care as much about displaying and so on.

thanks for the wonderful review!


 Report Review

Review #48, by RonsGirlFridayRon's Walk: Unexpected

15th August 2010:
I could just die happy after reading this, I really could. Such a beautiful portrayal of Ron's character. The descriptions and emotion in this were just right, too. And the R/Hr moment at the end was just enough, not overdone, but so touching.

This line might well be the most wonderful thing I have ever read in my life:

How delicately beautiful she was, how her face wasn't one that would bowl you over the first time you saw it, but one that was just so wholesome and intelligent that it could weave its way into your skin and heart until you found yourself thinking of little else... or so Ron found anyway.

And really, this line, too: So it was important to be lively. Ron could only congratulate Hermione's hair for realising this... but then she'd always realised things that he hadn't.

You have such a way of putting words to things I would find so difficult to articulate. And it's always unique - I have yet to find another writer who takes such a fresh perspective on things or uses such witty, whimsical phrasing. Every time I read something by you, it makes me smile. Especially if it's R/Hr - but even if it isn't, it's still superb.

xoxo
Melanie

Author's Response: You're too nice to me! My ego is twitching cheerfully...

Your last paragraph meant a lot to me because I tried quite hard with this story, mainly because writing Ron in a more serious way wasn't something I'd really done before and despite the self he puts forward I think there's a lot more to him.

I did want to put Hermione in it, but I really wanted to focus on Ron. But as she's so important to him the little Ron/Hermione moment had to be put in. :) I'm glad you didn't think it was overdone, because I was worried it would make it cheesy/too fluffy (even if there is such a thing!).

Ron's a character I often find myself wishing I had in my life! Life would never be boring with him in it I don't think! Of course no one is right for him other than Hermione but he'd be a great friend or brother... if only. :D

Thank you lots for your review! This one really made me happy. :)


 Report Review

Review #49, by RonsGirlFridayMuggle Fairy Tales: As Improved by Ronald Weasley: Sleeping Beauty

15th August 2010:
She'll prick her finger on one of Seamus' gelled hair spikes!!!

Oh my gosh. Have I ever laughed so hard while reading? I don't think I have. XD

You are so delightfully tongue-in-cheek with your writing. This line, for example: People didn't have new clothes for years, but the King and Queen decided that they would try and destroy the things that would send their daughter to sleep. And: If this were to occur nowadays, it would be called "sexual harassment" and would be a crime. And one more for good measure: He fell asleep too, though instead of a cursed sleep, it was a drunken stupor. The matter-of-fact tone of your delivery is priceless!

Ok, sorry - I was going to stop just quoting line after line and finally leave a proper review, but I have to note this one as well: Something suddenly heeded his progress though, and it suddenly struck him how often things occurred suddenly in his life. Would you please stop being so wry and clever? You're making the rest of us look bad. XD

I have no idea how you come up with such hilarious and inane ideas - and you pull it off like a pro! I just love how you're making a total satire of these fairy tales through Ron's imagination. More please! Can't wait for an update!

xoxo
Melanie

Author's Response: I just love writing this story! It's so much fun. :D Most of those crazy lines come from the top of my head when I'm typing, and when I read it back I think "God... how did I come up with that?!" I'm referring to the sexual harassment line here... I have no idea how it's even relevant to the story! I'll have to go back and check. :D

Yeah that suddenly line came about when I realised I'd used the word suddenly twice in one sentence so I added a third one for good measure!

I plan to update asap! I have been quite bad at doing things asap recently but I'll try my best!

Thank you for this review! I'm very pleased you're enjoying my fairytale so much. :)


 Report Review

Review #50, by RonsGirlFridayMuggle Fairy Tales: As Improved by Ronald Weasley: Cinderella

15th August 2010:
GAH. Where has this story been all my life?? There were several points during this chapter where I laughed out loud (of course, I laugh out loud frequently when reading your stuff!) So many favorite lines... this one was especially hilarious:

...the room was filled with more beautiful women, who suddenly deemed it prudent to strip down to their underwear.

Hahahaha!

And Gregorina and Vincella. And Fairy Godmother Dumbledore, with fairy wings, but not called a Fairy Godfather because it sounds too mafia. And the pumpkin carriage just a real pumpkin, only bigger with some wheels stuck on. XD You have such a flair for humor.

And the Ron/Hermione interaction and banter - complete perfection, as it always is when you write it. You are my go-to person for fabulous Ron/Hermione. It has been far too long since I've read your work - I really need to catch up!

And overall, just a brilliant idea for a story - Hermione trying to educate Ron in Muggle fairytales, and Ron messing them up and adding his own "improvements." I am just drooling over this story right now. I really envy your writing - truly envy it and wish I had ideas half this good!

xoxo
Melanie

Author's Response: Hello!!

How can you say that! Your ideas are up there with the original Harry Potter world itself!

Thank you for saying I can write Ron and Hermione well! I just enjoy it so much that hearing that other people enjoy it too makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

The idea came to me when I realised how scandalous it was that Ron thought Cinderella was an illness... now I love Ron dearly, really I do, but he crossed a line here.

He really did ruin this fairytale! Carnage and nudity... gosh, naughty Ron. I've also realised that he has a tendency to make all the men into girls... I love how I'm blaming all this dodgy stuff on him when it was me who wrote it.

Thank you so much for reviewing! It's great to hear from you again. :) Your reviews always make me feel happy!


 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login

<Previous Page   Jump:     Next Page>