Reading Reviews From Member: Animic
36 Reviews Found

Review #1, by AnimicSomeday, You Will: Collision

28th June 2010:
Hello, Animic here for duty!
I'm not a huge fan of romancey stuff, as you read, but this was alright. Normally, I just don't like it when it's all predictable and cliche. I'm glad that you stuck to Lucius' true personality and not created a false one. That's what I really hate.
I've never read a Lucius/Lily before so maybe I'm being biased, but I thought you handled it quite nicely. And I loved James (: It's exactly how I imagined him acting towards Lily. Muaha.
Oh, my favorite quote from Lucius was when he said somethign like, "I'm surprised you can speak with all that dirt in your mouth." When I read it, I was like. OH. Buuurrrnn! haha.
Overall, nice job. Didn't notice any grammar mistakes. At least not any noticable ones. And your style is quite nice. Well done :)

Author's Response: Yes! Lucius is so easy to mess up. It's nice to know I didn't. :D

And I love James, too. I honestly feel really bad for him in this story because as annoying as he can be, he really just doesn't want Lily to get hurt. But more on that later. :D

I was a little bit wary about that line, actually, so thanks for commenting on it because I definitely feel better about it now. :D

Thanks for the review!


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Review #2, by AnimicPerfect: Prologue and Chapter One

28th June 2010:
Hello! Animic from the forums here for duty! Haha.
I really liked this beginning to the story. I've written a story about a main girl named Tristan who was supposed to be a boy so this brings back fun memories :)
A little comma splices and period mistakes here and there but other than that, your heart is in the right place. I really like how she keeps on stating that "I will be that Gus. I will." It really gets sympathy for her and hoping that she will indeed become that Gus.
Overall, I thought it was a really good story. Nothing too bad to report. :) Feel free to request again for the second chapter if you like. Sorry, but due to my schedule and stuff and I'm only on my queue and my stories that I've been writing. haha.
Anyway, good story! :D

Author's Response: Thanks for your comments, I had re-requested for the next chapter :)

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Review #3, by AnimicTwice the Price: Act The Part

27th June 2010:
The idea certainly is unique. I like that about it :)
One thing is that it peeves me when stories start with a piece of dialogue. But that's just me. I'm more of a description person.
The names are very cool. I love weird and unusual names. Makes me want to know the character more. Makes it mystical. haha
I'm a little confused about why they're trading places for just a week but I'm guessing that will be covered later since you said this is a prologue.
The idea of the story kind of reminds me of Parent Trap. haha. Have you seen that movie?

Author's Response: Yeah, I've seen that movie! It is a little like that. ^^

I really like the names too. Before when writing I haven't really worried so much about names, but after being on the forums a bit I've realised that some people put a lot of weight in them and so I put some thought into these.

About the dialogue/description part, I guess it's just a matter of opinion. I have found myself starting a lot of stuff I write with description, so I thought I'd try to do it differently. Personally I don't have an opinion either way.

They're trading places for only a week for the simple reason that if they were to switch during a longer period of time the risks of someone noticing would increase since Vera would be expected to perform magic at Hogwarts and can't since she's a squib.

Gosh, this was a long response, but anyway, thanks a lot for the review! (:


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Review #4, by AnimicTo Capture a Beast: No Regret

27th June 2010: never really see Gregory Goyle fics around anymore. I thought you did a really good job. :) Good insight to Crabbes death.
Also, Hermione was a little biotch in this fic if I may say. haha.
One question. Where was Draco at the trial? I would have thought he would have at least been there. And been a witness. Since he was right there with them all. haha. Oh well.
Overall, I thought it was pretty good. Well written.

Author's Response: Wow, you got to this quickly!

Thanks! I'm glad that you think that it was written well and that it was a good portrayal of Crabbe's death. Haha, yes, Hermione is quite ruthless with former Death Eaters, and she was so much fun to write here.

Oh, you make a really good point about Draco. I think I'll throw in a mention of him now, but I don't think Goyle would dwell on him too much at that point in time.

Thank you very much for the great review!

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Review #5, by AnimicWhen The Dreaming Ends: When The Dreaming Ends

28th June 2009:
Animic here! :)

Hmm...I thought you balanced the story quite evenly. I think it was a very well done story. However, I never imagined Lily and James being so distant. Then again, that's just my opinion. haha. It was a very interesting approach to their lives after they had Harry. I kind of wanted to slap Lily when she started to think about Sirius and Remus. I find it funny that Wormtail wasn't mentioned at all. :P I wonder why. haha.

I liked it though. Kind of created an eerie sort of theme but it got cute at the end. haha. Almost really sad. Because we all know how it really turned out :(

Good job! :)

Author's Response: Thanks for the review!

No, I hadn\\\'t ever pictured James and Lily being distant either, but then this plot bunny struck and I decided that it could happen to anyone, really.

Yes, no Peter. Can you blame her? :P

Thanks; I wasn\\\'t sure whether I should have ended on a positive note because we know what happens, but I\\\'m glad you liked it! :)

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Review #6, by AnimicHate: Hate

28th June 2009:
Animic here!

I just wanted to say that this is one of the best stories I've read. I think you have Voldemorts character down PERFECTLY! I honestly thought it was amazing! I loved Veronica and her personality. She was everything Voldemort isn't and everything he deserved. Awh, it made me sad. :( Almost cried.

I loved it! I seriously think it was amazing! i have no criticism. 10/10!! For sure!!!


Author's Response: Aww thanks! :D :D Your review really made me happy! I was so worried when I wrote this because I never wrote something dark or about Voldemort so I'm really happy you like it!
Thank you so much for the review!

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Review #7, by AnimicDo You Need Me?: Of Unexpected Change

28th June 2009:
Animic here!

Oh no, not another Voldemorts daughter story! lol.
I thought your story was alright. I was rather dissappointed though. I've been reading a lot of Regulus Black fics and, I must say, people do not portray the Blacks as very nice people. They all seem to be desperate pigs. haha.

There were parts where I droned off a bit. You have two differnet parts. Dialogue and Description. It's either one or the other. I would suggest mixing it up a bit. Add a couple paragraphs between some of the dialogue.
Other than that, it was a good first chapter. :)


Author's Response: Oh no, she's not Voldy's daughter ^^
And well, you can't really portray Blacks as nice, with exception of Sirius and Andromeda (and maybe Narcissa, and yeah, Regulus happened to be an okay guy in the end =] ), but I suppose they were nice to purebloods, it wouldn't make sense for them to be rude or sth like that to those who deserve their respect.

Thanks for the advice, I'll try to improve (after all, I began writing fanfiction to improve my English :D ).

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Review #8, by AnimicBittersweet and Strange: As Old As Time

20th May 2009:
It's Animic again! :)

I really liked this one! Such a cute sort of fairy tale. I really liked the whole Mermaid tears part. That was really creative.

Honestly, I have no criticism. lol. Sorry I couldn't make my review any longer. I really liked it! 10/10


Author's Response: Oh good, I'm glad you like this fairy tale :) I have a soft spot for fairy tales myself and it's been really fun creating my own. Thanks for coming by to review and I hope you'll continue reading it when the update is posted!

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Review #9, by AnimicBittersweet and Strange: Positively Primeval

20th May 2009:
Animic here!
Sorry it took so long. I got caught up in school and everything.

I really liked your story! I got sucked into it, seriously, it was amazing! It was so calm, the way you described the scenery and everything was amazing. I love your characterization of Minerva. Myself, personally, I would have made Minerva a bit more bossy or mean but maybe she wasn't ALWAYS like that.

Overall, I thought you wrote beautifully. You really should continue. I loved it! 10/10


Author's Response: Hi there! Oh no problem at all, thanks for coming to review :) I appreciate it so much. I'm really glad you got sucked into the story, because I was afraid that it started off a bit too slow and people would be like, "Um okay where is she going with this..." So it's very kind of you to say that :D Well I never pictured McGonagall as bossy and mean, but I know what you're getting at - she's not as stern and uptight here as the older McGonagall is. But I like to think of her as a more carefree young woman :) Thank you so much!

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Review #10, by AnimicAngel of Darkness: Gone

18th April 2009:
How as this not gotten more reviews? Weird.

Hello! I want to thank you! I've been looking for forever for a darker character than the one I created. haha. I think, so far, it's an amazing story.

It does have some puncuation mistakes that could be corrected. They can be a bit distracting. Mostly it is just comma placement. Other than the comma's, it's your dialogue puncuation.
"This isn't right." Neville grounded out angrily.
should be
"This isn't right," Neville grounded out angrily.

Whenever you have someone 'saying' something after a quote, there should be a comma before the quotation marks. If it was just "This isn't right." then you put a period.

I really liked this story though :) 10/10

Author's Response: I'm not sure, I think it's a good story, but I'm biased.

I know my writing is a little scattered,, but I think I'm gettign there slowly.

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Review #11, by AnimicBecause Love Isn't Always Obvious: The One and Only

11th April 2009:
Hey, It's Animic!
Oh my god! I love you!! Haha. I have never read a Ron's perspective story but I definetely need to read more! The beginning was a little cliche and self-explanatory but you have Ron's character perfectly!
It's so amazing the way he thinks. It's exactly what I would imagine goes on in Ron's little world.
I LOVE the quote about cranky and pubescent. lol. Have you by chance seen the potterpuppetpals videos? I think you have. Wizard Angst says something about Harry feeling cranky and pubescent that day. haha.
I really liked your story. I was laughing outloud by the end. That's a good thing. :) haha

Author's Response: And I love you ;)

Thanks a ton for the review, it made me very happy.

Yes, i love PPP.. so that's where pubscent and cranky came form.. was just floating in my head [i watch PPPs over and over again!]

well thanks again!!

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Review #12, by AnimicYou Had Me: You Had Me

10th April 2009:
Hello, it's Animic!
I absolutely loved this story! I think it was short and too the point and leaves you wondering (in a goodway) what Scorpius did to her.
I think I may be the only one to say that I liked how short it was. It leaves you to wonder what happened and use your imagination and I liked that. Like I said, short and to the point.
I loved how you protrayed Rose and Scorpius and, yes, I also loved the 'Swish swish'
Really good! Loved it! Added it to my fav.s! 10/10!!
What can I say Erised? I love your stories. :)

Author's Response: Thanks Animic! I wanted the reader to use their own imagination as to what exactly happened before the events of the story - I'm glad you liked it.

Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #13, by AnimicIf I Was The One: If I Was The One

10th April 2009:
Hi, It's Animic from the forum!
I have never seen this idea for a story but it makes complete sense. Draco would mistreat Pansy like that. I think it's a very creative idea. I love stories based off songs.
I think you got Pansy's character good. She's a whiney girl who does kind of cling to Draco like that. However, Blaise seemed a bit too nice in this. I know J.K.R never really mentions Blaise much but if he were Draco's friend, don't you think he'd be just as bad? You could still have him feel sorry for Pansy but you could make him have worse thoughts on Draco. They are slytherins, after all. They aren't the nicest of the bunch and I believe you could have shown that better.
Plus, there was a lot of dialogue, but for where you were going, you needed that.
Overall, I liked it. I liked how he was imagining how it would go if he acted differently. I thought that was creativie. I really liked it. I'll give it a 9/10

Author's Response: Thank you so much. I'm glad you liked it ^_^

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Review #14, by AnimicChasing Reality: The Soaring Quidditch Chronicles

10th April 2009:
Haha, It's Animic!
I thought this chapter was quite funny. lol. I love the whole bird falling into her head deal. I thought that was very original. Very strange that it actually happened to one of your friends. Tell them, I'm sorry. haha
I loved the description of the Quidditch game back and the day.
Overall, I thought it was a very well done chapter. 10/10
-Sorry for the short review-

Author's Response: ahah, thanks, I'll tell her! It was kind of hard to write the Quidditch game scene, so good to know that it worked out. No problem, thanks for reviewing!

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Review #15, by AnimicChasing Reality: The New Editor-In-Chief

9th April 2009:
It's Animic from the review forum!
I really liked this story! I thought it was full of description and her thoughts. Sometimes I just hate dialogue when there's too much but you didn't put too much in at all! I enjoyed that very much.
Also, I believe you have a wonderful way with words in which I am suddenly extremely jealous of. Haha. I really can't explain it but your sentences flow very nicely and are almost always attached with a rather intelligent word. It's always fun to read stories written by smart authors. :D
Haha, I loved the ending. I love how she absolutely hates quidditch and gets assigned to being a sports editor. Lol. Good stuff. :P I also liked how Remus and Lily were complaining about their prefect duties. :P
I never would have expected Rita Skeeter to be in Hufflepuff. I would have guessed Ravenclaw or Slytherin but I'm not positive that J.K.Rowling every says what she was in so I can't complain. :P
Overall, amazing! 10/10

Author's Response: Whoa, thanks for the great review! It means a lot to me that you think I have a wonderful way with words (don't be jealous, you do too!). I wanted to paint a vivid picture of Hogwarts for the reader.

Wait until you see Leah actually writing about the Quidditch games! It'll be absolute torture for her, haha. I don't really see Rita as a Slytherin... I dunno, I guess I saw a Zacharias Smith vibe or something.

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Review #16, by AnimicThe Importance of Being...: Hungry.

9th April 2009:
Animic again! :)
I really liked this chapter. I thought it was cute. You're getting much better at your characterization with the Maraurders and I absolutely LOVE Lyla. I always picture her as Luna for some reason. Haha. I dunno why.
I LOVED the little conversation Sirius had with himself. I thought it was simply hilarious. :) Very entertaining.
I really don't have any criticism on this one. You've been doing much better. And Peter is finally talking more. :) haha.

Author's Response: I'm really glad you mentioned Sirius' 'inner monolgue' because I liked it but i wasn't sure if a reader would, but you did so woop! =]

Peter will be appearing more aswell now, because I'm going to be making a conscious effort not to forget him.

Thanks again for your great reviews.


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Review #17, by AnimicThe Importance of Being...: a Kid.

9th April 2009:
It's Animic again! Yay!
I'm not sure I like this chapter much. She did seem kinda whiney. I imagined Lyla to be a bit more tough and, personally, I would have waited awhile before you told the readers what happened with her parents and her brother. Leave them in suspense.
And, I don't really like the idea of a dance. I think it's used too much and not very likely that it would happen.
However, I did like the Great Hall scene. haha. I love the little rhythm game that Lyla and Sirius play. lol. I loved that.
It wasn't a terrible chapter but, it could have been better. Still fun to read. 7/10

Author's Response: I KNOW! I thought she was a bit whiney to!
There's a reason i mentioned the parents at this point but i wont explain (Dont want to ruin it) =]

With the dance i just wanted something to get the whole school together and allow them to be out of their uniforms. I know what you mean about it being done to death though.

Thanks your for your honesty its much appreciated!


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Review #18, by AnimicThe Importance of Being...: Smart.

9th April 2009:
It's Animic again!
I really liked this chapter. However, I thought that little bit at the very beginning with Lily and her friends was unneeded. I didn't see much of a use for that part.
I absolutely LOVE how she can, like, 'see' things. -Which hopefully you will explain later. haha- I think that is so so so cool! Makes her super extra special. :)
I really don't have much criticism. I thought the chapter was very well done. I'm very curious about Edward and what happened.
Nicely done, 10/10

Author's Response: Hey, Yeah she can "See things" all is explained within the next few chapters.

I'm really glad you liked this chapter because it was one of my faves to write.

Thanks again.


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Review #19, by AnimicThe Importance of Being...: Innocent

8th April 2009:
It's Animic again!
I liked this chapter as well. However, again, lots of dialogue. You do have a logical excuse, though. As your main characters is blind, she can't take in much of her surroundings. You could do something about the things that she hears. She does have a very good hearing ability, correct? You could use that as your way in to incredible description!
Also, again, where is Wormtail? I miss that annoying little fat nerd. :)
I still think your best canon character protrayed is Lily. I do think you've done good on Dumbledore. The Maraurders, however, could use some work. They seem to be very similar to me and everyone knows, they definetely were not smiliar. Try to bring out the James, Sirius, Remus (Peter?) that all the Harrry Potter fans know and love. :)
I do love your plot though! I think it's amazing! Very unique and original.

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Review #20, by AnimicThe Importance of Being...: Asleep

8th April 2009:
It's Animic from the review forum!
I really liked your story. I thought it was very original. I actually suspected that she was blind whenever the dog was there and she had the sunglasses on. I thought, that just can't be coincidental. Haha.
Lyla's a very unique character. She's not like the characters I read about daily which is good. I really like that about your character so far. :) Already, she already has a personality and that's awesome!
There seemed to be a lot of dialogue throughout this chapter. It was necessary, and I did love the little jokes between the Maraurders, but do try to cut down on your use of it. Dialogue can always enhance a story, but if you use too much, it'll go down.
I really liked the first chapter! I thought it was written quite well. Out of all your canon characters, I think you wrote Lily the best. The other Maraurders, I think, I would work on a tad. Also, was Peter not there? Haha. I know that Remus, James, and Sirius were the main characters of the four but Peter was their friend too and is worth mentioning. I don't think he even says much. From what I recall, he only spoke once. Just something I picked up on.
Very well so far. :)

Author's Response: Hi, thanks for takin the time to come and review =]

Your not the 1st person to mention the dialogue, so I will definatly try to put more description in there.

I'm glad you like it. Thanks again.


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Review #21, by AnimicJust Because: Fear Of Falling

7th April 2009:
It's Animic again!
I really liked this one! I loved the idea and the description of the broom and everything. Much much better! :D
I don't really have that much criticism for this chapter. I really liked it.
I am concerned how someone could get so sad about not playing Quidditch but I'll just accept it as one of her flaws. :P Just kidding. Haha
I think you did Wood much better in this chapter! He seemed a bit nicer in this chapter and I liked that more.
Really good job! I enjoyed reading it! :) 10/10

Author's Response: Thanks so much for reviewing again! I'm glad that you liked it! Praise makes me feel so bubbly inside!

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Review #22, by AnimicJust Because: Miss A Quidditch Practice Or Otherwise Die

7th April 2009:
Hello, It's Animic! :)
I thought your story was pretty funny. :) I loved Fred and George. You've got them down very well.
But, I think Oliver was a little more cruel than I remember him. lol. You got that he's cocky and that he is obsessed with Quidditch and not being late. I think he could be a bit more polite but I think you only put that in there for the purpose of the story.
Like you said, your OC wasn't very in depth but you already said that your going to improve. :)
Also, it seemed to me there was a lot of dialogue. I put a little more description and detail in random areas. I like those. :) Dialogue is good but take your time with explaining stuff and maybe go into a bit of detail on where she is and what things look like to her.
I'll review your next one. :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much for reviewing. I realize I made Oliver a bit more gruff in this... I think you'll have to see where I am going with this. Haha, I am planning on having my beta take another look at the first chapter. Thanks so much for reviewing

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Review #23, by AnimicPirates: Schemes, Screwy Politics, and... Sewing?

7th April 2009:
It's Animic again! Here to review your last requested chapter.
This chapter was all over the place, I thought. lol. SO much stuff was going on but I think that's what you were going for. It's often like that in this story. :)
I liked it. As for the whole Pansy thing, I'm still a bit confused, but I've only read the chapters you've asked me to. I thought she died. :P
And I really wanna know what she told Ron to ask Harry! Agh. lol.
I think, again, you did ok with Pansy. Moreso in this chapter than the others. I thought she was very much like herself in this chapter.
Lol. I liked the part in Hermione's POV. She's just like 'what the hell?!'
Lol. I really don't have much criticism at all. It was done very nicely.
Sorry for the short review. :/

Author's Response: ANIMIC!!! :)

Once again, amazing name.
Alrighty. It was all over the place, wasn't it? But you're right, I was going for that effect. I needed the readers to sort of feel that.. While one thing was going on, there were others. This is a very busy kingdom, and everything can happen really quickly? I think I did it to set the pace, also : )

Pansy's back :P It's a game, so she got resorted. I'm glad you think she's getting better and clearer as a character. I suppose she might be too good for a Pansy, but the 'Slytherin' has to count for something, right? haha.
Thank you so much :) I'm really happy you came by. Pansy worried me alot! I needed a strong second opinion. You just gave me one.

Once again, I really appreciate you taking your time to come by. It means alot to me!


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Review #24, by AnimicPirates: The Hanging

6th April 2009:
It's Animic again to review your second requested chapter! :D
I really like this idea for a story. I haven't read much of it but it's a very VERY unique idea that I've never really seen done before. Ever. Kudos to you for coming up with something unique. :)
I like how Ron and Harry are still up to their old jokes and still as best of friends as they could ever be. You have their personalities down. I really like that. Good characterization is always key.
You were asking about characterization on Pansy. Honestly, again, I think you're doing alright. I've never particularly thought of Pansy as the pretty one obsessed with her looks but Rowling doesn't say much about her except she's Slytherin and rude. I love how conceded you made her, which I've always expected her to be. My favorite part would have to be whenever you were in Pansy's point of view and she was saying how 'I was the best! I don't understand!'
I really liked that. It suits Pansy. I was very sad when she ended up being hanged. Even though I would have never thought for my life that Ron Weasley would have any sympathy for her. Haha. But, it could happen.
Best of luck for the rest of your story and I'll review your last requested one later.

Author's Response: Animic,

Do you mind if I say that name is very catchy? haha. Wow, you leave amazing reviews. Really.

I'm happy you like the idea. I tried to make it unique. Sometimes its a little too much for some people, so I think I need to work on the transition from world to game to invite more people in, but we'll see about that.
Ron and Harry are always fun about to write TOGETHER. WHen they're seperate is when I have problems.
Pansy: I never knew what she was really like, so I made her snarky and vain. I guess sometimes it's works. I had trouble with this chapter, simply because so much of it is a minor character, and well... I didn't know really how it fit.
I'm happy you like her :) That gives me a ton of relief.
Ron Weasley.. I'll look into this 'sympathy' check. See what I can do about it. You're right of course, I don't think he would do that either. I'll take a glance.

Thanks so much for coming by, yet again. I appreciate it much!


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Review #25, by AnimicPirates: To Fight a Pansy

5th April 2009:
It's Animic! From the review forums! Yay!
Wow, your story is brilliant. It reminded me a lot of Pirates of the Carribean which I'm sure was your starter. :)
I LOVED the way Hermione was captian and that she knew EVERYTHING! It is so like Hermione to know everything. And the fact that she was called Captain Hell made it even better.
You were asking for questions about Pansy. Honestly, I thought you did alright. I only have one criticism, I think. I know that she's Slytherin and they hate anyone who's born from muggles but I think they have better insults than just calling them 'mudbloods'. She seems to use the word mudblood a lot and, to be honest, it annoyed me slightly. :/ Oh, and I didn't particularly like the un-needed conversation over food. I realize what you were trying to do to prove that they were excelent swordswomen, which you proved nicely, but I believe it should have been over something else.
Other than that, I thought your story and characterization was perfect! It is like Pansy to give in so easily. I wouldn't necessarily say Hermione would have demanded so much but, hey, they ARE pirates after all. :P
Haha. I'll review the other two you asked me too later.

Author's Response: Hi!
Sorry for not getting to responding to this in a timely manner. No excuses :)

I'm so happy you're liking this story! Actually, to suprise you, Pirates of the Caribbean wasn't the starter... I was sick of reading the same Dramione Head Boy Head Girl thing... and how Draco turns out to be a daisy and Hermione is a goddess... And well, I had just been in a pirate play... and that's how it all got started :)

Hermione is a lot of fun to write :) Gosh, I'm so happy you reviewed! You're so bubbly! haha

Pansy: I'll see what I can do about the conversation. I think I recall having severe writers block... haha. And out came bananas? I'll see to that. Hopefully I can come up with something mindboggling :P haha. I'll think up some insults too. Other than that, I'm happy you think she's up to par :)

Thank you so much!!! I'm so happy you liked it, and your words just... make be feel bubbly too :) It's people like you who make our stories brilliant ;) haha. Once again, thanks! I'll be looking forward to your other reviews!!

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