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Reading Reviews From Member: adluvshp
1,995 Reviews Found

Review #26, by adluvshpPlay harmless: Play harmless

24th April 2017:
Hey there! Angie here (Lost muse) with your challenge review!

So, I loved the use of metaphor here - you use the ring to represent the relationship - and you explain the metaphor too! It was very interesting, and a little saddening that Neville and Hannah's relationship has gone down such a path. I find it a little difficult to digest that Neville would neglect his home life for his career, but then I suppose, people change as they grow up and face life.

My only point of critique here is that perhaps you should not have explained the metaphor so directly? I like the whole "this is implying that" aspect better, especially when dealing with metaphors, rather than it being out there. It is a lot more vivid writing for me if I "figure it out" rather than have it told. But of course, that is only my opinion. And sometimes, different narratives require different treatments!

Besides that, I think this was great. The way you characterise them both (Neville through Hannah's eyes - especially about his work life) was believable and Hannah's compromise and her thoughts on the matter made me want to reach out and give her a hug.

This was a beautiful little one-shot. Good work! Than you for participating in the challenge. Results will be out soon!


Author's Response: Hi Angie, Thank you so much for the review, and for the whole challenge! Oh, I'm so happy for winning the third place :) this was my first challenge :)

Your review is also very helpful! You are making a good point for not explaining the metaphor so directly (although I'm guessing that individual preferences might differ there), I won't change it now, but that's something I'll keep in mind for the future.

I'm glad you liked the sotry owerall, I'm sorry for making it so negative, I tried to keep future for Neville and Hannah open, despite experiencing a hard time at the moment.

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Review #27, by adluvshpHero: One Day at a Time

24th April 2017:
Ooh now this is a very interesting story! We have a classmate of Tom Riddle (Voldemort) - now that is something! And I believe something is going to happen between them - that was implied in the summary too. I wonder what will happen to poor Hero by the end but anyway before I start thinking about that, let's talk about the beginning of the story! So you already have me very intrigued - this is the perfect first chapter giving enough information yet keeping back enough too! Hero is a Gryffindor, she had something with Theo, and she got into some sort of accident "making out with a muggle and then killing him". Hmm, very very interesting. And somehow Tom riddle is also involved in the incident? I wonder if he is the one who killed the muggle. Very excited to know about all this!

Hero also seems like a very genuine and likeable character. I like the little details like how her family disapproves of her and how much she is not looking forward to Hogwarts, and how she is kinda in that mindset that her grades have to be absolutely perfect. Her pain, subtly enough, comes through and I am curious to see how her relationships develop further.

Oh and random point, but i like how we have familiar last names like diggory. And also, Finn the brother appears really awful - there are annoying siblings and then there are plain horrible ones and he fits the latter category ugh!

Good start to the story!

Author's Response: Thank you so much!!! ♥

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Review #28, by adluvshpThis Melancholy Soundtrack: This Melancholy Soundtrack

17th April 2017:
Oh dear this broke my poor heart. Can I give Scorpius a big hug? He seems to be really, really miserable and it is so sad that his life is at such a standstill when Rose has moved on and is happy. Though Teddy? Wow, I did not see that coming! At least she is happy, and well, she is genuinely nice to Scorpius - she still does care for him, even as a friend. I think how you wrote Scorpius is amazing - his grief, his frustration, it was very much on point. How he was drowning in his sorrow, how the music was too painful and reminded him of his past, it was surreal and tragic and beautiful. I wonder why they broke up though - you mentioned it was a messy break up but it would have perhaps been nice to also know why? A line or two as Scorpius reflects on what happened? That little detail would have definitely added more to the intensity of the pain, at least for me. Besides that, I think this was absolutely beautifully written with wonderful imagery. How you manifested his pain physically also worked very well, I love such things, so him throwing up in the end made perfect sense. And of course, the descriptions were magnificent - simple lines such as "he was drawn" really struck a chord with me. I loved this overall!

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Review #29, by adluvshpSurvival of the Fittest: Is this the end of the world?

12th April 2017:
Hey I didn't even know I had a special mention in the A/N - i am so excited your character is Indian! Your story seems very interesting - the idea of goblins wanting to wipe out all wizards is crazy and dark and I would love to know more backstory as to why and how and what happened, i guess the registry act is a part of it. Poor Theo and Riya - teenagers like that being on the run must be difficult. They seem to be best friends, I wonder if they will fall in love, or something else is in store for them. I love how we already get a glimpse into both their personalities, and Theo seems adorable from Riya's eyes. Your descriptions of their fear and anxiety is on point and I could feel as if I am right there in the forest with them running away, afraid of being followed. The imagery is superb and the way you particularly described the goblin was pretty scary - which is saying something since I never saw them as intimidating creatures. I am glad they are able to get a little rest by the end of this chapter because it sure seems like they'll be getting a lot less of that as the story progresses and the plot thickens. So far, it's brilliant and I would love to keep reading!

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Review #30, by adluvshpWith All Things: George, August 1998

12th April 2017:
Aw, this was so sweet. It's a heartbreaking story, writing about a life of George without Fred and so far you've tackled the subject pretty well. It is a great way to build up on the coming plot. I loved how sweet ron was to stop by and find out how his brother was doing. The awkwardness and the discomfort as well as the grief between the two was palpable and realistic. Lee taking George out was also a nice gesture and I felt george's annoyance at everyone asking how he was doing. The way he could not take in everyone's pity and grief made sense and I felt so bad for him when he had to leave the pub after the toast to Fred. Everyone is trying to be supportive but they don't realise that it is affecting george worse at this point of time - a very understandable situation. And then of course, Angelina's entry made it all better. I was glad she did not treat him the way others did, and that she was behaving normally. She is exactly what he needs at this point of time, and the way you wrote that, with snippets of their past relationship as well as current emotions, was perfect. I am glad the chapter ended on a positive note and i hope george's life improves for the better with angelina by his side. Beautiful descriptions and great dialogue too - and i really like the characterisation so far. cheers!

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Review #31, by adluvshpDominique: At a Loss

12th April 2017:
This was oh so heartbreaking and very sad and I almost cried. Dom is one of my favourite characters to write so i am always fascinated by others' perspective of her, and must I say, you wrote her brilliantly. I can already connect with her and I feel for her very strongly. My heart breaks for her. The way you write her grief is intense and believable, how she could not cry yet also makes sense - the numb feeling is perfectly described. How she started laughing when the aurors were there, poor thing, again common in cases of shock and grief. The little snippets we get explaining her and Lorcan's backstory, as well as her history with Lysander, are very intriguing and they make me want to read more as to what happens next. I am also curious to know how lorcan died, references were made to it but nothing is clear yet. Lysander seems nice, albeit a little bit of a jerk, but i can see he is going to be there for Dom and that's what matters. Your narrative and dialogue is smooth-flowing, and really the imagery is haunting. This is a great first chapter as it sets up the plot and tells me the essential bits but keeps a lot of information hidden so I am curious to read on. Poor Dom, I hope she can cope up with this, and am already rooting for lysander to help her out of her state of mind. Great start to the story!

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Review #32, by adluvshpGoodbye: Charlie

9th April 2017:
Oh dear this killed me, this broke my heart, I want to cry forever. "The saying is wrong Fred. I can read loss. I can read it on Ginnyís face. I can read it in Mumís sobs. I can read it in Dadís tears." THIS. MY GOD THIS. How heartbreaking. Reading about Fred's death always turns me into a puddle of tears but reading it from Charlie's POV like this and seeing his grief alongside his family's is oh so tragic. Especially since you weave the words like a painting and bring it out so visually that I can see it happening in my mind's eye. And then how he notices that Ron has grown up so much, such little details, and in the midst of a post-war grieving, my god how painful it must be. The way he was saying sorry for not being there, for having missed out, it totally broke my heart. Poor Charlie, he should not feel this way. Distance means nothing for love and family. The way you expressed his pain, at how his time in Romania seemed pointless now, the emptiness he felt, it made sense and was very understandable and intense. And oh merlin the ending sentence of Fred looking down at his brother, it sent me crying again. I want to give them all a big hug. What a beautiful sad chapter.

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Review #33, by adluvshpGood Night, Albus: Good Night, Albus (Contest)

9th April 2017:
Aw, this was a sweet little friendship fic between dumbledore and mcgonagall and i liked that. Dumbledore having trouble sleeping because of the past, the thoughts of Ariana haunting him, it all makes sense, and aligns with what happened to him in the half blood prince book when he drank that horrible potion which makes you relive your worst memories. Him not wanting to sleep and whiling away his time by doing odd things like deciphering runes and having lemon drop candies was a nice touch. I also liked how the gift was introduced first and the significance of it later - like minerva knew that dumbledore wash having trouble and so she particularly gave him that gift. and when she showed up to soothe him and slipped him the dreamless sleep potion in the milk, maybe not the most ethical thing to do, but definitely something a good friend would. The bond shared between albus and minerva is a great one and rarely highlighted so am happy you wrote about it here and gave importance to it, it made me smile. How the two have each other's backs all the time is remarkable. The characterisation was also done well and while I think the dialogues could have been written better, you still did a good attempt, so kudos!

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Review #34, by adluvshpA Very Puppy Christmas: His name is...

9th April 2017:
Aw, this was such an adorable little one-shot. I have turned this into a podcast before but did not get time to review it, so I am glad i can do so now. Lily is so cutely written and Harry as a father is superb. His care and concern for his kids and wanting to give them the best gift is absolutely heartwarming. The way he felt for the little black puppy as soon as he saw it and took it in and cared for it was oh so sweet. And then Lily's excitement at seeing it and how much she immediately loved the puppy was so believable and adorable. I am glad Ginny agreed to keep it too, and of course, if they are naming it Snuffles it would melt anyone's heart. You are missed, Sirius. It was also really nice to see the dynamics of the Potter family - Harry, his wife, and his kids. They all seemed very happy and relaxed and I am glad harry got the life he deserved here, with nothing to worry him, and how he still is the same person inside with so much goodness in his heart and his care for others. The playful nature of Lily and the wife persona that Ginny has is also on point, and I loved how they all went to celebrate christmas at the burrow - their bonds are still intact. A very happy and lovely christmas fic!

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Review #35, by adluvshpMaking a Broken Heart: Making Mistakes

9th April 2017:
Your descriptions of Molly flying is done very well, i could visualise the scene of her soaring into the air, trying to keep her balance, experience that feeling, and then falling. Ouch. I am confused though, I think levitation charm works on people too, and not just objects like clothes - but maybe she is not strong enough to make it work on a human being. I really liked that sentence of "this was not magic anymore, it was science and gravity" - it sounded poetic almost and added authenticity to what was happening. The entry of Chris was really nice and he was so helpful and sweet, the way he ran to her rescue and helped her up and healed her. The discussion on what she was trying to do and Quidditch helped them bond I suppose, and then how they knew each other, they simply seemed to click and it was cute how Molly developed an instant crush on him with the familiar feeling of butterflies and all that jazz. You had the right mix of dialogue and narrative, and the plot seems interesting, though I would have liked a little more backstory and build-up but perhaps that can be done in later chapters. Besides that, this flowed smoothly and I was really into it while reading so good job! Molly's journey has just begin and it's interesting already!

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Review #36, by adluvshpUnexpected Parenthood: Chapter Five

9th April 2017:
So, Flick is a Slytherin! That is nice, and Albus is the father, wow! I wonder how he will react when he finds out - he should be mad that she never told him she was pregnant with his kid(s) because really both the parents have the right to know even if the decision of what to do with the pregnancy resides with the mother in such cases. Regardless, am excited she is going to go back to school and see her friends. They must feel awfully confused, and i am glad you gave us insights into their lives a little bit through the letters and her thoughts, like Scorpius wanting rose, and Dom being her best friend, and also only the few close people knowing the truth about her mother. The story is headed in an interesting direction and am looking forward to seeing how things turn out. I really would have liked more description and dialogue though, as it seems to be description isolated and dialogue isolated rather than a mix. Also, more letters, especially one from Albus would have been good to see where they stand today (or where they stood before she left). Backstories are important to build a relationship with the characters in my opinion. But apart from that, this is fun to read, good going!

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Review #37, by adluvshpMeant for Two: You and Me

9th April 2017:
Aw, this was sad and gave me all the feels and at the same it was so beautifully written, it tugged at my heartstrings. I have to admin I could not guess who the narrator was so I peeked at the other reviews and it is katie bell! I should have thought of that! But anyway this story made so much sense, the effects of the war, the brooding, how Katie was alone, and then Harry comes in, their awkward conversation and slowly they ease into it, it was really well-written in the most realistic fashion. The progression of things was brilliant and how she envisioned her life with Harry and yet it could never happen broke my heart. The little inclusions or mentions of ginny and hermione and ron etc were good. Descriptions of harry through katie's eyes also made him very appealing, and the way you described how happy he was with ginny was sweet though of course i felt bad for katie. I loved how all of this started with finding the right glove for Ginny, what a lovely little anecdote and shows you how love can strike in the smallest of things, even if it is unrequited. Your phrases and imagery was beautiful and really I was sucked into the narrative completely while reading. 10/10!

Author's Response: Howdy Angie! I'm sorry it's been awhile, but thank you so much for this kind review!

I'm glad you thought the original post-war interaction worked well. I think people often move too quickly through the immediate post-war, including the immediate reality for the popular canon couples while they're separated - especially Harry and Ginny who are basically apart QUITE a bit for the better part of two (2) years.

I'm also glad you felt the initial interaction and then the ongoing...I suppose you'd call them observations...by Katie of the way her fantasized reality keeps slipping away, moment by moment, until Harry and Ginny are officially married and the emotions they bring.

I usually am "meh" about my own descriptions too, so I really appreciate hearing that the phrases and imagery drew you in.

Thanks again for the great review, Angie!

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Review #38, by adluvshpWorship You: Storm

9th April 2017:
OMG SIAN YOU BEAUTIFUL WRITER YOU! this was so amazing omg i forgot what it was like to read the beauty you possess in your skills. but enough gushing, (not really), I LOVED IT SO MUCH! Okay so I loved how you kept this ambigious and I was trying to figure out who was the object of affections here - first i was like it is a star so possibly Sirius, and then it became clear it was a girl and Slytherin, and then the dark lord thing and I was like OH it's Bellatrix now that is very very interesting!

The narrator am guessing was the Astronomy professor so Sinistra? I have never come across such a pairing before and I did not think she would be a Slytherin but your portrayal of her is now my official head canon because it was written so perfectly, i could totally imagine it. I liked how we saw the subtle differences in their personalities too, like how Sinistra is grounded but Bellatrix is after to conquer the world with the dark lord by her side (or the other way round really).

The way you described her love for bella was also absolutely haunting and beautiful and intense. I could feel it and i was so absorbed into reading it. The ending was so fitting in the way they were on the opposite sides of the war. and of course, all the star references were so beautiful! This was full of lovely imagery and had a very poetic feel to it. 10/10!

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Review #39, by adluvshpTaking the cheesy way out: Taking the cheesy way out

9th April 2017:
Ooh, Teddy as a cheesemaker, now that is fun and interesting and might I add, a brilliant idea! The beginning segment was really nice with teddy being unsure about his career, you showed his frustration subtly but enough to convey it. And it was sweet that he is close enough with his grandmother to discuss these things. The ad being "mysterious" was pretty cool and i loved how teddy ended up there - Greta seems like a really nice lady, sharp but sweet. And she sure is cheesy (haha). The way you explained the cheesemaking process in the magical world was very fascinating - the use of charms and transfiguration, and the requirement of potions knowledge made sense. Teddy's attitude for the interview was also well-written and believable. The ending segment was really sweet. I am glad Victoire was so supportive of him, and I could see how close the two were and how much they loved each other already. Teddy wanting to work with someone who knew his dad was so sweet and also a little sad, but I am glad things worked out for him. You totally did the idea justice, in fact I feel like I want to read more of this - how things progress in his life now! Great job!

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Review #40, by adluvshpHis Footsteps : Break

9th April 2017:
Oh dear this broke my heart, poor Teddy and Victoire. Secondary PTSD can be very difficult to deal with so I am sorry you had to go through with it *hugs* You wrote it in a perfect manner though - as someone who has no experience with it, I could still feel the pain and angst of it. For a moment (when she said Rose), i thought this was Ron and Hermione but then I realised it was Teddy/Victoire and it broke my heart even more, because those two deserve to be happy - they are the first kids born after the war and they deserve to be free of such pain and live their lives happily. *wipes tears* Nevertheless, this was so very beautiful and haunting, your writing is absolutely amazing. The descriptions were perfect and I almost got goosebumps when she was sitting upstairs, listening to his footsteps and the racket he was making. I felt so bad for her. And then when he came and she was laughing, I was afraid he would do something but they argued and he left so I sighed in relief. Of course it still is pretty heartbreaking and horrible. Little things like how she is now an expert in repair spells and earlier she used to be mad but not anymore show how long this has been going on now, and that really added to the narrative. All in all, loved it, beautiful! Sad but well-written.

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Review #41, by adluvshpChasing Life, Seeking Love, Keeping Hope: Harry's Emotional Rollercoaster

8th April 2017:
Aww, the progression of Ginny and Harry's relationship was really sweet. I think you wrote it in a very good manner as such scenes can be tricky to handle. It had the right amount of detail and yet wasn't too graphic. At the same time, as their first time, it was also a little awkward and yet they both enjoyed it and basked in its glow. They are content with each other and that really came through which was great. Kreacher really knows what's up too haha but I guess house-elves have a bond with their masters to know of important events xP
The visit to the Weasleys after that was fun. Arthur knew what happened, that is so mortifying, poor harry! And what an embarassing conversation to have. What I found quite interesting was your take on the activity, and how you had both of them cast the spells - if only muggle life was as easy hahaha xD
And yay for girl talk. I think it is really healthy and much needed especially after something big like this so glad that Ginny and Hermione spent a good time. I love how their friendship is also deep and it's not the trio but the quartet that is together. Great going!

Author's Response: Thanks, adluvshp!

I try to be tasteful in those personal scenes. The reason I write them is to attempt to portray them as whole persons and, hopefully, present a more realistic portrayal of their characters. Glad you liked it.

In the same vein, I've tried to bring Hermione and Ginny closer, thus cementing the "Golden Quartet" motif.

Thanks for the review!!

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Review #42, by adluvshpChasing Life, Seeking Love, Keeping Hope: Harry's Startling Surprise

8th April 2017:
Ooh so this was an interesting chapter and I loved how fleur was the one guiding harry through everything. You got her accent and dialogue down pretty well, good work there. Harry's nervousness and confusion were spot on, totally understandable, I would feel similarly overwhlemed if i was in his place. The whole idea of investment portfolios is surely very interesting and unique, and especially in terms of how you have merged the magical and muggle ideas in there. Even having wizards invest in both magical and muggle ventures, now that is something creative and practical and believable too! Poor Harry though, he really is lost, it makes sense that he has no idea how to manage anything, money or property or investments, and of course lovely Fleur understands. The whole goblin system and the linking of the vaults is another little detailed addition that works to add to the credibility of this world you have created or built upon so i like that too. And yay Harry buying his new broomstick for the team purposes - now that's fun! Wouldn't it have been nicer if he had taken Ron or someone along though? Regardless, the shopkeeper's interaction was also nicely done there and I liked the note this chapter ended on - it's all going well!

Author's Response: Hey again, adluvshp!

Again, thanks fir the review!

As I mentioned, I've tried to portray the characters as humanly as possible. Harry's befuddlement his new-found wealth and responsibility is just such a portrayal.

I'm glad you like the little details of wizarding banking...again, trying to be a s real as possible - little details do that.

Please read all of my chapters - you will find why Harry went to the Quidditch shop by himself in earlier chapters! :D

Keep those reviews coming!

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Review #43, by adluvshpChasing Life, Seeking Love, Keeping Hope: First Day On The Job

8th April 2017:
Aw Ron suggesting Hermione how to do stuff is so cute. What would she do without him really, sometimes she forgets she is a witch. Ginny, Ron and Harry all need to balance their schedules! Personally, Hermione would be a great Minister for Magic, much better than some lame people they have had like Fudge and Scrimgeour really. She is so passionate for her causes too - so I was really pleased that you included that bit of conversation even if it was meant as a joke and she says she has no desire to be minister as of now! It's sad about Harry and Ginny though, they will be seeing so less of each other - it will be like a long distance relationship, but then you write them so well and they fit so perfectly, am sure they will work things out! The whole "emotions" dialogue was the best - it reminded me of the teaspoon conversation between ron and hermione in order of the phoenix, you really draw amazing parallels and make me smile xD It's cute how Ron and Harry are starting to grow up and try to figure out the women in their lives and be good men to them. It's really refreshing to read a light fic overall about how their lives have progressed and changed and how things are going. I liked the chapter despite it being a filler of sorts! Lots of nice little details that add to the main narrative!

Author's Response: Hi adluvshp! Back again, I see!

I like to add bits in my story about how Hermione and Harry sometimes "forget" that they're witches and wizards. It seems logical to me.

I really liked writing the "emotions" dialogue, as you so aptly and nicely put it. It all seems logical and progressive to me...Harry is growing up and is 'free' from his destiny - he, naturally, would have to come to terms with his past and his future at some point. I'm glad you liked it!

Hope to hear more from you soon!

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Review #44, by adluvshpChasing Life, Seeking Love, Keeping Hope: Seamus Lends A Helping Hand...And Hammer.

8th April 2017:
Renovation time! It can be both fun and a pain, and I think you showed that pretty accurately. Seamus having a good craftsmanship came as a surprise but it's good he helped out with the extension charms and stuff. It takes a lot of thinking to write a chapter like this and it's nice you have taken what jkr wrote and built upon that in terms of the spells and all. I really liked the prototype fred and george built and how you used it to explain the bridging between muggle technology and magical devices. Good concept and nice way of expressing it. Weasley twins putting their creative brains to use! Also, kudos on keeping Seamus in character, the way you write his dialogue is perfect and reminds me of his canon self.

Friday night came quickly. Harry, with Teddy on his shoulders, was waiting for Ginny outside the Holyhead facilities when she came through the gate. -- aww the image of this is so cute, little Teddy sitting on his godfather's shoulders. The whole idea of magical cells was super cool too and I am glad Ginny and Fleur and all are going to be working on the project - definitely some interesting ideas there.
Oh and also I can't believe Ginny called Harry "tiger" haha. And yeah of course they will be okay, am sure things will work out for the best - really sweet moments there, and good writing. Kudos.

Author's Response: Hello, adluvshp! Thanks for returning to my story!

I always liked Seamus, so I tried to build on what canon said (or didn't say) about his background. He became a great ally to Harry, so I thought I would add him in the story. I'm glad you liked what i did with him!

Aha! Caught you! It was George , alone, who came up with the magical battery idea...Fred is, sadly, no longer with us, per canon. Please read both of my stories, in sequential order...I think you'll like what I did with George, especially in the second story!!

I love writing what I call "Teddy Moments"! I've tried to expound on that relationship, knowing how Harry would feel about "family"...especially his orphaned god-son!

Thanks for the read and review. I hope to see more from you!!!

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Review #45, by adluvshpChasing Life, Seeking Love, Keeping Hope: Final Matches

8th April 2017:
Aww Teddy is so adorable - yes Teddy Hawie will win haha. Harry is really lucky and blessed that his family and loved ones are so supportive of him. I wonder how video recorders can work in the Quidditch pitch though, doesn't the magical energy interfere with the electronic device (or the other way around)? But then I suppose that by this time they have learned to make things work.

You wrote the match quite well. It was quick and easy to read and not too long that it would get boring. Harry made a record of 45 seconds woohoo! And of course, gotta love Oliver Wood, am glad he was a part of the chapter!

Ginny's nervousness and anticipation and excitement all at once mixed up feelings totally made sense. I would feel like that too if I was in her place. You really got her character and emotions across well here! All of them playing Quidditch can of course be nerve-wracking and a little crazy but it works out fine in the end so yay!

I am not a huge fan of statistics and don't understand them all that well so I am not too happy that the chapter ended on that note with the statistics - would have been nicer if it was finished with a scene or a dialogue or a thought, but that is my personal opinion. Overall though, it was a good chapter with lots of energy and fast pacing and I really got into it while reading!

Author's Response: Hey, adluvshp!!

Again...love my Teddy Moments!!

In earlier chapters I explain how the magical cells work, so there's no magic interference. Please read this story through from front to back...I think you'll really like the details I throw in!!!

I'm sorry you weren't thrilled with the stats, but I added them for the hard-core Quidditch readers. Can't leave out the hard-core fans!!

I'm glad you like the action and pace of the chapter and I await more excellent reviews from you!!

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Review #46, by adluvshpChasing Life, Seeking Love, Keeping Hope: The Afterparty

8th April 2017:
The return of the famous beaded handbag! I loved it in the
deathly hallows so I am really glad you brought it in here.
That moment was so adorable when Harry got it and
everyone was amused, but then yay presents! It was very
sweet of him to show appreciation for everyone - it is so like
Harry, and I liked you showed that.

Lightening in a bolt or Calamity in a can hahaha that was so
fun. It sounded so authentic. The weasley twins never fail to
crack me up and you got them down really well. The ending
segment between Ginny and Harry was really sweet and as
always their romance makes me smile. The earring and the
inscription was beautiful. Your dialogues overall were very
much in character for the people too, like I liked how Molly
and Arthur got the vacation they wanted, and stuff. Oh and
Hagrid! I loved his inclusion in there, it's so great that you
had him because so many people forget to include him in
post-war stories. And that Hermione and Harry moment was
also very sweet, almost got me teary eyed the way he calls
her sis - it really puts their dynamic into perspective! All in
all lovely chapter, a very happy one, and I am glad things are
going well for the gang. Great work!

Author's Response: Love see you again, adluvshp!!

Ah yes...the beaded bag! You don't think Hermione would ever get rid of it, do you? LOL!

I've tried to stay in canon and true to the original characters as much as possible. With Harry and Hermione being besties, on the run for so long together and not romantically involved, I couldn't see Harry NOT having a brother/sister relationship with her. It only seemed natural.

Always love to hear from you...keep those reviews coming!!

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Review #47, by adluvshpChasing Life, Seeking Love, Keeping Hope: Some Tricky Magic

8th April 2017:
That bit of conversation when they were figuring out about the wards was really well-written. I liked how Ron came up with his own genius analogy of how it was like cake and managed to explain it too - in a way that it made sense to me too. And then Harry making the connection about the house-elves was perfect. The way you write how they all brainstorm stuff together is very effortless to read and understand. That little moment of Hermione being called "Miss SPEW" was cute hehe. And ugh Rita skeeter is so annoying. Didn't she learn her lesson in Hogwarts about slandering the "quartet". I could kill her, lol. Ginny's reaction was totally justified. Her feeling of not being able to help Harry and crying about it was a little strange because I would think she is usually stronger than that but oh well. It works along the storyline I suppose. Harry and Ginny are ridiculously adorable though. I love the sweet talk the two share, and their dialogues are really well-written. Their moments are my favourite and am glad you ended the chapter on such a nice note like that - him thinking that this is real family. Very sweet!

Author's Response: Hey, again, adluvshp!!

I really like this review contest thing going on!! Love getting and responding to reviews!! Thanks!!

You know...being an amateur thespian, I just hear their conversations in my head (Yes, with their different voices) and I just write what I hear. Weird, I know!

Yes, Ginny is a VERY strong woman...but when it's your soul-mate that is in turmoil and pain, even the strongest of women (and men) sometimes have to have a good cry. I find it an especially deep realization for Ginny. She is from a large family and probably has never know loneliness...especially the long-term loneliness that Harry has had to endure. That kind of world-changing view can have a profound emotional impact on a person...even one as strong as Ginny!

I love that you liked the chapter. Keep reading and reviewing!! :D

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Review #48, by adluvshpChasing Life, Seeking Love, Keeping Hope: Thinking Outside The Box

8th April 2017:
Ooh martial arts, that's an interesting inclusion and i liked how you have gone in depth regarding that here - research must have gone into it! This Master Wu was an interesting and enjoyable character to read. Your mix of the martial arts with magic is a great concept and then the way you have written it, I am able to imagine the scene and visualise what's happening! This whole angle of Quidditch with investors and all is also quite new and interesting, we definitely did not think of all this when we read about Quidditch in the canon books but your perspective on all this makes a lot of sense! It's really fun that they are going to be silent investors too, I was not expecting that, and Hermione's reasoning as always is on point. "W AND W Investing" - so devious haha, I love it the way Ron loved the idea too. Hermione is after all an awesome devious member of the trio too. I am also looking forward to Fleur's involvement, it's a great thing they have included her! I am glad the couples are having a good time and that their life is sorted, or it's on the path to be at least! The interactions and thoughts were nicely written, good work!

Author's Response: Again, hello adluvshp!!

I thought the mixture of martial arts and wizardry worked quite well and quite natural. I have practiced a few styles of martial arts, so yes, there was some research, but also some practical experience.

Also, I figured Quidditch is a professional sport, so there had to be some type of investment...just like other pro sports...so i added that into the story line. I'm glad you could follow the idea.

Well, with all the devious things the Golden Trio did while students, I didn't think it would rub off too soon! :)

Glad you liked the ideas and the chapter! Keep it up...I'd love some more reviews from you!

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Review #49, by adluvshpChasing Life, Seeking Love, Keeping Hope: Luna Gets The Inside Scoop

8th April 2017:
Ooh Neville proposed to Hannah, that's so sweet. It's nice that post-war all these guys (and girls) have kept in touch and are friends and things are going well for all of them. I also liked the inclusion of Luna in this chapter. Writing her can be difficult but I think you did a fairly good job of writing her, especially in terms of dialogues. The interview was a nice way to get out all the information and the inside thoughts of the group. And the way Harry revealed Ginny was his girlfriend was cute, hehe. I like how you modified the muggle saying to a magical one by saying "kneazle" instead of cat by the way. And ugh I totally cringe at "Golden Quartet" that sounds so bad, worse than golden trio, haha. Also the way luna got dazed out and was captivated by their answers was in-character and also really sweet. The last bit was nice too, with Ginny saying Luna was like family. It warmed my heart. Such little touches work well to add intricacy to the story. I really enjoyed reading the backstories of what they all did after the war too, and overall I think it was a great way to take the story forward. Oh and Hermione doing welfare work for elves and creatures and stuff is also awesome, very much in character and loved that addition!

Author's Response: Thanks, adluvshp!

Writing Luna was a bit tricky...I know she seems a bit daft most of the time, but I wanted to show her maturing with the others, but not losing her "Lunaness", if you know what I mean.

I'm really glad you liked the little touches and back stories...I try to fill in gaps whenever I can and I'd set that up in earlier chapters, so I felt the time was right with this chapter.

Thanks again and keep reading...you know I love reviews!!

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Review #50, by adluvshpChasing Life, Seeking Love, Keeping Hope: Puddlemere vs. Pride of Portree

8th April 2017:
Harry contemplating about not knowing what love was made me so very sad. Of all the people in the HP universe, he should not be feeling like that - and I'm glad he realised that. His doubts made sense but then I was happy he came to the conclusion that he could love and make Ginny happy! Also, random thing but I love the idea of Harry with a golden hoop earring hehe.

"Harry felt a sense of calm and stillness that he had never felt before. The pitch became crystal clear.." This entire paragraph was really well-written and visually appealing. I was transported into the scene and could imagine the calm and happiness he felt on the pitch. And from that point on, the match was written very well, great descriptions and detail. I wish you broke up the huge chunks of paragraphs though as they can be a little hard on the eye to read and I tend to lose track of the flow at times. But besides that, this makes for a good read and the characters are relatable. Teddy is so adorable and I absolutely love how Harry treats his little godson, that is one side of him we did not get to see in the books but you have shown well. And also, i love how we see young harry still in him - that he did not hear anything because he was so focused on the match. great details there.

Author's Response: Hey adluvshp...nice to see you!!

Well, Harry has only realized recently what real, true love is...so he's still a bit wary of it, I think. He can be a bit thick about those kinds of things.

Oooh...I love when people say they can "see" what I wrote, like a movie or something. Lets me know I've hit the nail on the head!!

I will take you advice and try to break those big blocks up a bit.

And, I love my "Teddy Moments"...that's what I call the bits with Harry and Teddy together! He's adorable. I hope I've done him justice!

Thanks again for the review...keep 'em coming!!!

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