Cookies are in the hoven =D LOL
I was a bit confused by the kiss part, but I got it on my second read of that paragraph. I wasn't expecting it, though.
This was an intense chapter, I don't know what to make of it yet. Got to keep reading.
I have another theory! The thuds are made by older!Moody coming into the cabinet. It's his pegleg hitting the floor. xD
Oh and that CI is amazing! So much depth :wub:
Amazing chapter as usual ^_^ I feel like my reviews are getting shorter with every chapter xD Don't be alarmed, though, you're writing is still amazing. I'm just not feeling myself today.Author's Response: The cookies!!! I hope they tasted good (as, alas, I can only imagine.). ;)
The kiss is abstractly described - I do that too often and have to be careful about it because what I see and what I write end up being completely different, and it stops making sense. >< But it is doomed to be confusing because it happens so fast - he kissing her like that before she even knows what's going on. She's definitely overwhelmed, and doesn't know what to make of it either. :P
Wow, I'm glad you like the chapter image! I've worried that it's overfiltered, but I like the composition too much to try redoing it - the depth did turn out well (if I may say so).
Thank you so much for your reviews, Becca! You include a lot in each, so I don't even notice the shortening length. XD I really appreciate that you took the time to read this story! ^_^ Report Review
I read this a couple of days ago, but didn't know how to phrase the review. I had to read it again, but I still don't know how to review this xD It's not the first time it has happened, it happened with the second chapter of "Venom" - I've read it some time ago, but didn't know what to say xD
I have this crack pot theory that both the person/thing that's knocking on the cabinet and the woman in the portrait are Lily. I dont know why or how, but I'm getting this feeling that at least one of them is her.
Even more crack pot is the other theory I have that there is a twin portrait inside the cabinet and the one doing the knocking or thud's on the cabinet is the woman from the portrait.
But don't mind my theories, I'm sure I'm going to discover what's going on soon =PAuthor's Response: Oh dear, the chapters leave you speechless? These two stories are complex monsters - emotionally and mentally draining to write because there's a lot going on, lots of epic (on my side at least, I can never tell what's going on on the reader's side :P).
Crackpot theories are always welcome! The whole Doctor Who influence on this story means lots of theories are necessary to hook readers along, haha. I love including all the puzzles in this story, slowly revealing more and more as I go along, but also including details that make one doubt those theories. :P One can't be sure of the answers...
... and don't expect me to reveal anything. XD
I like your theories, though. Very interesting... ;)
Thanks very much for reading and reviewing this story, Becca! It's a pleasure to hear from you! ^_^ Report Review
First of all, you must tell me where you got the stock for the CI =P I want those eyes!!
I was shocked when I saw Mad-Eye make an appearance. I should read the story summary and the character list xD
This chapter reminded me so much of the Doctor/River story arc. Will they meet at different times and out of order, as well? It felt like it's what's happening/going to happen. - Nevermind, just read the chapter summaries xD
I don't know if that's actually canon, but I remember when I read your entry to one of the HPFF site wide challenges, back in February (I think) that it was about Mad-Eye's mother and it was set in Cairo, or it was very connected to Cairo. I love that you have these little things that can connect your stories together. It gives them such much more depth. It's something I've always thought of doing with my own stories, though I don't have enough stories and am too much of a bad updater to do it just yet =P
Now you making Lily handicapped has another meaning. It's one thing they have in common, or one of the things =P
Since I think it's still the 19th where you live, this is still one of the birthday reviews ^_^ So, happy birthday again! xD
Next chapter...Author's Response: Haha, that stock is addicting, so watch out! After getting it, I used it everywhere - but it does suit Mad-Eye really well, so it helps when making the chapter images/graphics for this the story. ;)
The Doctor/River story really inspired my plot for this, a key of sorts for how to navigate a "backwards" relationship that's spread across time. I strangely wrote this chapter before Series 6 began, so it was the weirdest thing to see exactly how that ship unfolded, and of course, you can see the influence of Series 6 on later chapters of this story.
That one-shot from the Writer's Duel and this one are connected - the same Moody with the same history (he's also the same in "This Longing" and his mother's the lead character of "Black Sands"). It's just something that saves me time when developing characters and backstories - I only really change characterizations when I either want to do something different with a character or when the plot wouldn't suit that particular characterization. Like you said, it does help with depth because it's something I've been able to explore in a previous story, and so there's less flailing around and more getting to the point. :D I'm glad that you caught that and like it - I'm always worried that it'll be confusing to readers.
Thank you again for reading and reviewing, Becca! It's been great to hear from you about this story! ^_^ Report Review
Well, since you asked on the forums for some birthday reviews, I decided that I should start with this story. After all it's the one I made the banner for and I'm ashamed that I haven't read it yet. The reviews for the other stories I'm currently reading will come in time, though =)
I don't really know where to start with this. Maybe I should start by saying that I love the way you write, but you already know that xD There is only one thing, isn't Flora the term for plants? I think Fauna is for animals and Flora for plants.
I'm liking Lily's characterization so far. I don't read many fanfics with Lily as a main character (I'm writing one, though) so I don't know how different your Lily is from the other Lilys ou there. But she looks like a solid character.
One thing I have to say - she is brave. xD If I was alone in a cottage, at night and heard a sound coming from the attick, I would stay as far away from it as I could.
Can't wait to see where she'll end up =P This reminds me of the Chronicles of Narnia for some reason.
PS: I'm spreading these reviews throughout the week, so they are not only for your birthay, but also for Christmas =D
Happy birthday again and happy Holidays.Author's Response: Thank you so much for this, Becca! It's not only wonderful to receive reviews from you, but to have these birthday presents for my favourite story makes them that much more appreciated. It means a lot to hear your opinions. ^_^
Flora is the one I meant to use. *hides* I've fixed that now.
Lily's definitely brave, like both her parents, but with a foolhardiness that comes of being her father's daughter. I find that the more I write of her, the more she becomes like Harry, with his odd impulsive courage and desire to "save" others at risk to himself. So when Lily hears a sound, she's going to be silly and go and see what's up. *rolls eyes* I'm with you - I'd be hiding under a blanket in the corner of a sofa.
It's a little like Narnia with the whole cabinet thing - I didn't think of that until after, but the travel through time instead of into a different world helps keep them different enough. *crosses fingers*
Anyway, thank you again! And I hope that you had a great holiday, too! :D Report Review
Finally got around to finish reading this. I had to go to sleep halfway through, so I only managed to finish now.
Just a heads up: it looks like you have IV twice, so this really has 10 parts, not 9 =P
I loved reading this. I simpathised with Lily, but I couldn't get over the fact that she was basically emotionally cheating on James, all through their relationship. I understand her motives (once again from experience - seriously are you writing about my life or what? =P) but poor James. He was the rebound guy and he kinda knew it. It's really cruel, especially when she's imagining Snape coming to "rescue" her from her wedding.
Oh and that part when she's thinking if he "wouldn't have liked to start again?" and she replies with "I do." She's replying to both questions, that she wants to start again and that she accepts James as her husband. Brilliant! But you already know that xD
This quote "Once more unto the breach." appears in two moments that follow eachother. It got me thinking that it's something that one of them learned from the other. Like those things you start doing or saying just by living with someone for some time and you don't even realise it.
I had never read anything in reverse chronology and this gave me an idea for a story. I don't need anymore ideas, really. Just by seeing your graphics I get a million plot bunnies and that isn't good for my muse or my other unfinished stories =P
I would say happy Halloween, but it's too late xD
~ BeccaAuthor's Response: Oh Becca, this is amazing! It's a really long story, so I don't blame you for taking your time - splitting it up might actually make it make more sense. I didn't even write it in order, but took the pieces and rearranged them as I went so that the reverse chronology would work. One of the results of this was that quote you picked out - the "once more unto the breach" one - which was repeated just for the reason you said. She's echoing his words in her mind after the fact, revealing to the reader, if not to herself, that she does take his words seriously, learning from him in many ways. :)
Aww, did I mess up the numbers? I would say that I did it on purpose, but that would not be true. I'll have to go fix that - thanks for mentioning it!
It's a very complicated view of Lily, and perhaps the most sympathetic portrayal of James that I could possibly write - it's like a complete switch of their characters, making him the ideal (husband, in this case) and her this devious prankster who causes emotional harm. Snape is very much absent from this story, so I can't say how he was affected by Lily's actions, but like you said, James suffers. He has a strong idea of the reasons behind Lily's acceptance of his proposal, but he just takes it because it means having her - it's really weird. The RL moment it stemmed from - the first scene shown here, scene #10 - was weird, and so the rest of the story burst out from that. It's crazy that, once again, I've written your life into a story - but I guess people emotionally manipulate others, whether they meant to or not, whether they want to cause harm or not. For Lily, it entirely backfires, and she must suffer the consequences, making James suffer along with her.
This reminds me how ridiculously painful this story was to write. I hated it and loved it all at once - it might make a better OF because the canon aspects are what cause me most pause. The dark!Lily in this story is downright disturbing, not OOC but certainly not very canon. :S
Will you write reverse chronology too!? I'd love to see more of them - they're wonderfully complex and have so much potential. Oooh, please do! You don't have many WIPs at all, and one-shots are always nice breaks from longer pieces. ^_^
Anyway, thank you very much for reading and reviewing this story! You're a wonderful reviewer and I really appreciate you taking the time out to check out my stories. :D Report Review
You know? Your stories are perfect to be read out loud. I have this tendency to read books out loud, because it's a totally different experience than to read them to myself. That's why I sometimes read really slow =P
Your writing flows so well, that is impossible to read it other than out loud and with the appropriate enphasis - or the enphasis that I think you meant to give it. I'm impressed you don't have anything on HPPC yet.
Anyway, I never thought that reading about a game of chess would be so exciting, or that someone could write an entire chapter on it, so I commend you. =D I really enjoyed reading this.
Next chapter...Author's Response: Becca! *jaw drops* How do I respond to this? There's going to be a lot of gushing here, so brace yourself. Seeing you reviewing my stories is amazing and it means a lot that you've done so - that they're such positive reviews only pushes me over the edge into extreme happiness. ^_^
So they read aloud well? That's interesting. The one story of mine that was done for HPPC was an old thing, and my wordiness back then was making poor Alex gasp for air. Getting the right rhythm is something I've been working on for my more dramatic stories - this, "Out of Time", and the last few Lily one-shots - using a poetic structure (very much like Dr. Seuss's, actually), which has really affected my word choice and syntax, seemingly in a very good way. :D It's fantastic to hear that this style is working out!
Haha, it's wizard chess that makes this more exciting - it's a far more brutal game, like a real battle rather than the slow, very deliberate games that Muggles play. It's more fun to write than I expected, and I'm glad that you liked it too!
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing this story! I hope that you enjoy the rest! ^_^ Report Review
Yes, I have decided that I'm going to read your stories =P Starting with this one, which looks like it's one of your most famous ones.
I loved this Prologue. You don't know how hard this hit home for me, since I'm facing a similar decision as Rose faced here. One that I think will end up as this chapter ended.
Beautifully written =) And on to the next chapter I go. ^_^Author's Response: Is it? I actually had to look and compare to double check, and yes, it's my second most popular story! Murder on the Hogwarts Express is the only one with more reviews, and while this one has more favourites, MotHE has a Dobby, so it all balances out in the end. :P
It's sad that I had to check and weigh the two stories against each other. It's what comes of being from a numbers family. *rolls eyes*
Anyway, thank you so much for your review! I didn't expect you'd take on a long one, being busy as you must be, but it will be wonderful to hear your opinions on this story! It means a lot that you've enjoyed this chapter, and I hope that you enjoy the rest as well! ^_^
I'm very sorry to hear that you're facing the same decision as Rose, probably with the same results - it hits Rose hard, and I can imagine it would be worse in real life. *huggles* Report Review
Since today is your birthday, I decided to leave a couple of more reviews ;)
Awww, Arthur is so sweet *wub* I'm really loving this story so far ^^
One thing that got me kind of confused for a bit. This line "He hoped Molly wasn’t too embarrassed to come down for breakfast. He didn’t like to start off his day without seeing her." Did you mean to say the next day? Because you were talking about the dinner and all of a sudden mention breakfast and the start of the day and I got confused. =P
~ BeccaAuthor's Response: Aw thanks! I love reviews.
He meant the next day, yeah, because they're at dinner and she's not there, so he's thinking he won't see her again until breakfast - unless she is still embarrassed and doesn't come downstairs. Sorry for the confusion. In my head that made sense lol
Thank you for the reviews! *hugs* Report Review
Ah I knew it *shifty eyes*
Poor Arthur =( Can't wait to see how their love develops =P
Great chapter ^^
~BeccaAuthor's Response: lol. Yep, he loves her! I started the story meaning to write mostly Molly and wound up loving writing Arthur's POV. I do love him. Thank you for reviewing! And for the birthday wishes! Report Review
I said I was going to read it :P
Ahah, poor Molly, it was her fault, though. That's exactly how teenagers work :P
Aww, Arthur. Did the love potion even work on him? Thaddeus is acting more obssessive and Arthur saying it was her choice.was he in love with her before the potion? :P
I'm going to read one chapter a day, if you don't mind. Don't want to rush through this ^^
~ BeccaAuthor's Response: Yes you did :) Thank you for reading and reviewing, I appreciate it.
Y'know, it really IS how teenagers work - and it was all Molly's own fault. Good catch on the effects of the potion. It was because he was already in love with her, yes.
Thank you again!
WTM Report Review
OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!
What timming! I don't use to go to the recently added list, and today I decided to check it. What do I see? This story!
I've been waiting years (literally, since you last updated at MNFF) for chapter 39 and for you to finish the fic. I kept checking almost every month, in hope that there would be a new chapter.
I just cannot believe! I hope you finish it, cause you left it at such a cliff-hanger.
Happy times =D
~ Becca Report Review
This is a beatiful piece of writing, Rin. Truly emotional. I loved it.
And the dedication was so sweet. Thank you. I love you too *hugs*
BeccaAuthor's Response: Aw, Becca, thank you so much! Your review means so much to me. :) Report Review
This is just so funny Liam.
The "He did not" and the way they talk, that is so out of their time xD
Keep it up, this has potential ;)Author's Response: Thanks so much Becca! :D
I'm glad you liked it, and yes, it is. Aha, I hate to see that in fanfics unless it's a really serious fic, so that was fun to play with.
Thanks so much hon!
xo Report Review
Hi Shiloh! =D
Here I am finally to review. =P
I must say I'm really impressed. This felt like poetry to me.
When I start reading a chapter I first see how long it is. And although yours is not long, the size of the chapters scared me. I was afraid that it would be a bit boring and that I would get lost in the middle of a paragraph.
But it was completely the opposite. The flow was so good, that I didn't even notice the size of the paragraphs anymore. It is so well written that instead of reading it I was declaiming it. That only happens when I get really into the story. I just wish it was longer.
Now onto the story itself. I think you did wonderful with Bella's characterization. She's such an interesting character.
I definantly think that her only love would be Voldemort, rather than her own husband. After all the purebloods didn't exactly marry for love. I don't think she would entirely give up hope, about Voldemort's return, though. Since she's one of - if not the - Voldermot's most faithful followers.
Also the title totally fits the story.
Nice addition, with Sirius enprisonment. Fighting it is so like him.
I'd love to read this as a series of one-shots. Maybe with events like Sirius escape and the other breaking her out of Azkaban. All of them portaying her spiraling descend to madness. =P
Overall I'll give it a 10/10 and I'm adding it to my favourites.
Keep writing like this ;)
PS: This is a really long review xD Hope you didn't get bored with itAuthor's Response: Becca! Thanks so much! I'm glad you liked it. :D And I never get bored with nice, long reviews, they make my day. :) Thanks so much! I appreciate you taking the time to stop by. Report Review
Here again =)
Ahhh so it was Selwyn that killed her parents. I was expecting that he would escape Azkaban, but not this soon.
I'm a bit curious about the relationship between Mary and Lupin. Is it going to evolve?
I'm starting to like this story, so feel free to drop by the review thread and request some more reviews ;)
ForgottenFaceAuthor's Response: Thanks for the reviews. I will definitely be back to request more. I am very glad you liked the first few chapters. Report Review
Here I am again =)
So let me start by saying what a worndeful job you're doing with this story. I know it's only chapter 2, but this has great potential.
I think the part about the way she was trying her hardest to avoyd looking at the Death Eater was really well written.
There's only one thing that I think you should fix. I made that mistake too and some of my reviewers said I should change. The word Auror should be capitalized.
I had a feeling that the man that went to get her was someone she knew from Hogwarts. That's why we looked sad when she said she didn't knew him.
Just one more thing I forgot to say in the first review: Love the banner! LOL
ForgottenFaceAuthor's Response: Thank you so much for the CC you've given me. and thank you again for taking the time to read and review this. Report Review
Hi, here I am to review. I'm sooo sorry for the delay =S
I don't know what to say. I don't have any CC to give.
The flow was good, since it's only the first chapter there not much I can say about the plot.
I like the fact that you are writing the present and making her remember the past at the same time. So it's like telling two stories at the same time.
I don't have anything else to say ;)
Off to the next chapter I go.
ForgottenFaceAuthor's Response: Thanks so much for reading this and reviewing it. I'm glad you thought there wasn't much CC to be given. Report Review
O.O - just had to do that before I could apologise for being so late in reviewing. I'm so sorry.
I've never read a Merope/Tom Riddle fanfic before (that's the perks of having a review thread, you find amazing stories, that you thought you would never read)
Your writing is simply marvelous. Everythig was so poetic and it flew so well.
I actually thought this was a one-shot. (When chapter 2 is up don't hesitate to request for another review ;))
The only CC I have to give is: You should be a little more careful with ponctuation. It's just that there are some long sentences that don't have commas, and I think that you would benefit from that. Especially in the second paragraph.
And in the second sentence, of the first paragraph, I think there should be a comma after perfection.
But that's just me being a little picky. You don't have to take my advice if you don't want to ;)
But don't worry, your writing is amazing.
Once again, sorry for taking so long to review
ForgottenFaceAuthor's Response: thank you so much for the wonderful review and lovely suggestions. i will definitely request again when the second chapter is up. thanks again, and no worries about being a bit late with reviewing. i did not think that you were late at all. Report Review
Hi Liam! Sorry for taking so long to review =S
I wish it was longer. I would have loved to know how they got together in the first place. Maybe you could write a prequel =P j/k LOL
I love Scorpius and it's a little hard for me to read him as an alcoholic and cheating husband.
But I did like how you described Rose's feeling towards the end of the story. And that the weather matched her mood. It could be interpreted as figuratively speaking.
I didn't like Rose's comment about not breastfeeding Yasmine, because she's not a cow. Breastfeeding is one of the most natural things a woman can do, not to mention that it is really important to the child.
Feel free to request for more reviews Liam =D
ForgottenFaceAuthor's Response: Yay, don't worry about it.
Well, I would have liked it to be longer aswell, but I wanted to keep it short and simple.
Also, I wanted my Scorpius to be different to "caring and devoted brilliant lover Scorpius" that seems to be everywhere.
About the cow comment thing, some women do feel uncomfortable breastfeeding. I actually got that comment from my own mum, strangely enough ^_^
Thanks Rebeca, I'll start beta'ing chapter three soon (: Report Review
Hi Ilia =)
You know that is actually a condition/disorder, when you can't feel anything. Have you seen that episode of House? LOL
I love the fact that's Luna who has it. It explains why she stares at people with dreamy eyes. I wouldn't be surprised if that was cannon LOL She was in character, in the way she talked with Harry and when she was with the unicorn, she loves magical animals, and they never seem to fear her.
Harry still patient with her LOL
I really liked it ;)
ForgottenFaceAuthor's Response: Thank you for reviewing! Yes, I do know it's a real disorder, but no, I haven't seen that episode of house =P
It was a last minute decision to make it Luna, but I had the same thought; there had to be a reason why she was so dreamy all the time. Thank you so much for reviewing. I really appreciate your comments ^_^ Report Review
Hey! Sorry it took me so long to review =S
I've never read a Draco/Luna before, and I have to say that this surprised me, in a good way.
I have no doubts that Draco would be able to feel such strong feelings for someone. And Luna looked more wise, but still herself (she's already wise in the books, even while being a little eccentric, she's one of the most wise characters in the books)
I would like to know more about how they got together in the first place.
It was a good story to get me in the Draco/Luna ship =)
Feel free to request more reviews for other stories ;)
ForgottenFaceAuthor's Response: No probs, I'm glad you found the time to pop by, and I'm really pleased that DM/LL managed to give you a good suprise lol.
I'm glad you agreed over Draco's feelings, a snag I sometimes run into with writing Draco is that some people always want him to be cold and unfeeling, some readers don't open their mind to "private Draco" how he would behave with someone he really cared about.
Luna is the wisest character in HP I think, excluding Dumbledore, I'm happy that you thought I managed to keep that aspect of her in this one shot.
If I can convert someone new to Draco/Luna my day is complete lol. I'll be sure to drop by with some more fics for you.
thanks for taking the time to review. Report Review
I'm starting to enjoy this story. I have an idea of where it is going...
Your portrayal of the Gringotts goblins was ver accurate. And I must say this is the first story I read that has a Gringotts goblin in it LOL
Although there's not that much information about Quinn, I like her.
Feel free to request for more reviews if you want =)
ForgottenFaceAuthor's Response: Hi again. Thank you for continued reviews. I will request the next three chapters next. Lol.
I must admit, that I often find it really funny how little people use the Harry Potter world to write fanfiction. They have Harry/Ron/Hermione do things that usually would be done by some other minor character which would be so much more interesting. - Hence the Goblins. Why use a Wizard when a goblin is much funnier?
Quinn is one of those people, you'll gather information on her as you go along. I wanted her sort of anonymous as it started out, but you will get more and more information until you know pretty much everything about her.
Chele. Report Review
Hi again =)
Oh no! What will happen to her now? =O
I like the fact that Quinn wasn't a Gryffindor. In every story I read, the main character is always in Gryffindor, and that gets wuite boring after a while. So it's a good thing that your's isn't =)
I loved the complete change of mood in the begining. Really good ;)
ForgottenFaceAuthor's Response: He he he.
Hi there, and thank you for reviewing again.
Quinn wouldn't make a good Gryffindor. She's not brave. If she was brave, she would have stood up to Saxon long ago, but no. I'm a minor character fan, so always loving the non Gryffindors. :)
Keep reading to find out. he he.
Hi, here I am reveiwing. Sorry it took so long =/
I've never read a story that comes from and RPG board, so this will be interesting =)
Mason Walker seems like a disgusting man, from what Jess has said. But I have this feeling that he is not guilty.
Azkaban looks like an horrific place. The Ministry just drop the prisoners there and practically wanting to forget about them. But I'm wondering, since there are no guards (except when they bring food and more prisoners) and the only thin that's keeping them in, wouldn't they be able to start a mutiny and when the guards come, just take the portkeys and run? Well the guards would have wands, but there must be more prisoners than guards. Just a thought LOL
I liked it so far ;)
Next chapter, here I go!
ForgottenFaceAuthor's Response: Hi there. Thank you for the review.
In answer to your question about mutiny... (which is good because you're the only one who asked,) the Portkeys are specifically made so that only one person can use them. For example, when a prisoner is released, the portkey is made for them, and them only. So if they're not the one holding it, it doesn't go anywhere and the prisoner has to wait another week to get one.
And Mason... well, I can't say much more than, he's not the nicest guy on the planet.
Chele. Report Review
Here I am again =) Sorry is taking so long
I liked this chapter.
I think that Sirius would act like that if something like that happened to him in the books. He's independent and losing all that freedom so suddenly must really be hard. I feel bad for him, it's like everything bad happens to him =S
Feel free to request more reviews if you want ;)
ForgottenFaceAuthor's Response: THank you so much for the reviews! *HUGS* Report Review
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