Reading Reviews From Member: marissa lily potter
  
187 Reviews Found

Review #1, by marissa lily potterTrying not to love you: Chapter twenty-three - Heaven. Or Hell.

22nd December 2013:
Holy Merlin, did that actually just happen right at the end? I've been waiting for this moment for ages and I didn't think it was going to come haha. Poor Gwenny! I can't even begin to imagine all the mixed up feelings she's going to have to deal with after this. And what is James really thinking? I cannot wait to see what happens between them after this, as awkward as it might be. This story just never fails to amuse me. It's well written and fun to read! I am so stoked for the next chapter!

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Review #2, by marissa lily potterThe World, Biscuits And Sirius Black According To Nellie O’Neill.: Hypocrites, Break-ups, Firewhiskey’s and Me

16th August 2013:
Uh is it bad that I don't know whether I'm shipping Nellie/Sirius or Nellie/Regulus? Haha I love them both. This is killing me. Your characterizations are amazing! Nellie is such a lovable character but I think my favourite has got to be Izzie. She's so spunky and cool. I just love everything about her! Can't wait to continue reading! : )

Author's Response: Haha. Quite a few people feel the same thing! Thank you so much, I'm so glad you like the characters! I hope you like the rest of the story. Thanks so much for the review and I hope you have a great day :) Xx

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Review #3, by marissa lily potterThe World, Biscuits And Sirius Black According To Nellie O’Neill.: Feelings, Past, Memories And Me

16th August 2013:
That was one amazing plot twist. I love and hate Regulus at the same time haha. It's a nice backstory you gave to Nellie and Regulus's relationship! It definitely caught me off guard but it was awesome all the same!

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked the little twist in this chapter :) I loved writing it! Thank you, that means a lot to me, Nellie and Regulus are really fun to write about. Thanks for the review and I hope you have a great day! Xxx

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Review #4, by marissa lily potterMesses of Men : Mad About the Boy

29th June 2013:
I am loving this story although Iris is quite indecisive. I love where this is going and I think it's progressing at a fairly nice rate. It's well written and funny!

I still ship Iris/Ace. You gotta love Ace haha.

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Review #5, by marissa lily potterTug Of War: Muffins

22nd November 2012:
Lovely first chapter! It definitely got my attention right away. I love Stella & her quirky behaviour. She's definitely one of the best characters I've seen, especially from just a chapter of knowing her. I can't wait to see what you have in store for this story! :)

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Review #6, by marissa lily potterLet's Play a Love Game: Roses

18th August 2012:
Hey there, marissa lily potter here with the review you requested.

I think you started the story off well. There was a lot of intrigue and suspense which kept me going but the intrigue and suspense was borderline confusion at some parts in the chapter. I know that you'll probably get to the plot and develop it more as the story gets on but it was a bit confusing which could potentially throw off readers.

The spelling/grammar was great! I am very pleased to say that I didn't spot any errors which is always nice and makes the chapter more fun to read. I think that this story has a lot of potential. The only thing I would recommend is to characterize Angie a bit better. She's really vague right now and personally, as a reader myself, I love to be able to relate to the characters which can't be done if they're not fully developed.

Overall, great work. I think you've got great potential and I wish you luck with your story! I would love to see how this plays out and once you've got another chapter up, feel free to re-request!

xx
Marissa

Author's Response: Hi, Marissa! Thanks for getting to this so quickly :D

Ugh, that always happens to me! My first chapters are usually quite wobbly, but I'll definitely smooth things out in future chapters and edits :P Thanks for pointing that out, hon. I'll fix it, for sure.

Oh, yay! No grammar/spelling is awesome to hear :D I try to be careful about that, haha. Okay, I'll definitely characterize Angie better. I'm glad you liked reading this, though :D

Thank you so much! You've been so helpful; I'll definitely re-request!


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Review #7, by marissa lily potterThe Last Ones Dying: The Last Ones Dying

18th August 2012:
Hey there, marissa lily potter here with your review!

So even though it was a pretty short story, it was really cute and well thought out. The thoughts were just enough to let the audience grasp the situation. I think it would have been nicer if you could have set up the scene more, more imagery and descriptions would have allowed for a better setting.

It was fun to read and pretty cute. I love stories about Fred and George and although it's a sad thing, I'm glad you conveyed the point through a bit of humour. It was very Fred and George like. The flow was a bit choppy but the spelling/grammar was great! Overall, good work! :)

xx
Marissa

Author's Response: Hey Marissa! :) Thanks so much for reading this.

I was thinking about expanding it, but I also wanted to keep it short and simple. I'll check over the flow. I felt, too, that it's a bit weird in places. Anyway, thank you so much for all your comments and feedback. I'm glad you liked it overall. :)

Liz


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Review #8, by marissa lily potterWicked Lies, Wicked Love: From Games To War

18th August 2012:
Hey there,

Wow, I really loved this chapter! It was filled with fun and intrigue! I was already quite excited to read it from the way you left off your last chapter but my excitement was increased throughout this one. It was great how the chapter flowed. There were no parts where I thought it was a bit choppy.

Also, it wasn't boring at all. Everything about it was interesting. Your plot is developing really well and I can see that you've got great ideas planned for this story. Lucius and Narcissa are both very strong characters but I'm glad that you've made them strong in their own way. One thing I see often it the main characters being too similar.

It's a good thing that you've characterized them well. I think their characters play an important role in seizing and understaing the story. Overall, great work! Spelling and grammar mistakes were kept to a minimum, the interest level was high and the flow was amazing. You've got a great story coming along!

xx
Marissa

Author's Response: Thank you so much love! I'll be requesting again soon when the next chapter is up :) xx

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Review #9, by marissa lily potterAnd Capers Ensue: Choose Wisely

10th August 2012:
I absolutely adore Albus. I honestly can't get enough of him! Also, is it just me or is Ravenclaw the new Gryffindor, at least for the next gens? ;) Lovely story! It's absolutely amazing and your plot seems great so far! I love your writing style and how well you've developed your characters! Great work, keep it up! :)

-Marissa

Author's Response: He becomes such a star, doesn't he? ^__^ I don't know about Ravenclaws trends, but I like to write a whole bunch of them, being one myself. Cleverness leads to quite a lot of mischief ;)

Thank you!


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Review #10, by marissa lily potterDesperate Times, Desperate Measures: The Date

9th August 2012:
These two just keep getting cuter! Ahh I love Penny & Ollie ;)

-Marissa

Author's Response: Thanks for all the reviews so far! Wow, you're great :) and I do love Penny and Ollie too, hehe, although I don't think they'd like it all that much if you called them that ;)

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Review #11, by marissa lily potterDesperate Times, Desperate Measures: Second Thoughts and Sudden Realisations

9th August 2012:
Aww well aren't they just too cute? I adore the Oliver Wood and Penelope Clearwater pairing! You're really great at writing them both :)

-Marissa

Author's Response: Thank you! I never even considered Oliver and Penelope, then I came up with it one day and my friend (peppersweet, she's brilliant, so read some of her stuff too) said it was a legit ship, so I knew I had to write it.

They are quite cute, but I still think Derek is the cutest. Maybe it's because of the picture of him in the banner (and therefore my love of JGL...)


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Review #12, by marissa lily potterDesperate Times, Desperate Measures: The Agony Aunts

9th August 2012:
So I kind of don't get how Derek or Roger will get what they want... I mean, it'll be interesting to see where it goes but as of now, I'm kind of lost. Anyway, Fred & George are so awesome! I absolutely love them! :D

-Marissa

Author's Response: Fred and George woo! They are seriously too brilliant for words (in terms of JKR, not me, I'm not that big-headed).

And you'll see with Roger and Derek. Maybe neither of them will get what they want, hehe. Stirring the pot a bit here, aren't I? ;)


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Review #13, by marissa lily potterDesperate Times, Desperate Measures: In Which There is No Sexual Tension Whatsoever

9th August 2012:
Oh snap, she slapped him? I didn't see that one coming! I thought Penelope would succumb to his charm haha! But seriously loved this chapter! I think Penelope is an amazing character and I quite like Audrey too :)

-Marissa

Author's Response: Everyone succumbed to his charm! I did ;) and apparently a few other reviewers have too, haha. But thank you, I think this was one of my favourite chapters to write. What with the slap and all the tension, it was hard but a lot of fun.

Audrey grows on you, I promise. She's just a bit...selfish to begin with. She's nice, honestly.


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Review #14, by marissa lily potterDesperate Times, Desperate Measures: Caveman Tendencies

9th August 2012:
So I just love Penelope & Oliver, can I say that? They're extremely adorable! Ah I can't even begin to describe how amazingly cute they are. I love how Oliver is so obsessed with Quidditch & how Penny is just so studious. Opposites attract, right?

-Marissa

Author's Response: Opposites do attract, I think you hit the nail on the head there! Oliver's Quidditch obsession made me laugh in the books, so of course I couldn't ignore that in fic. It was just so wonderfully written by JKR, I wanted to do it justice.

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Review #15, by marissa lily potterDesperate Times, Desperate Measures: Too Close For Comfort

9th August 2012:
I seriously love this. Where do you come up with it? Penelope is so funny & I think her and Oliver are adorable together even if they don't truly know it yet haha. Amazing work as usual!

-Marissa

Author's Response: Well, it all stems from some very funny, very witty high school rom coms that I watch religiously - namely 'Clueless' and '10 Things I Hate About You'. They seriously are such hilarious films and I can't stop watching them!

Penelope was quite fun to write, and Oliver is just Oliver. Oh they would be adorable together wouldn't they? I'll let you see how that pans out, haha.


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Review #16, by marissa lily potterDesperate Times, Desperate Measures: Fraternising with the Enemy

9th August 2012:
I really like this story! It's so funny & even though I'm a sucker for canon stuf when it comes to the Hogwarts genre, I can't help but really like this story! It's funny, entertaining & definitely intriguing! Great work :)

-Marissa

Author's Response: Thank you! This was definitely one of my favourite ones to write so far (and that's saying something, seeing as I've been writing fic since 2006)!

But thank you so much for the lovely review! I hope you like the next chapter when I put it up (which should be soon, I promise)

~Hannah


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Review #17, by marissa lily potterSeven Weddings: A Letter.

4th August 2012:
I think Albus is adorable. He seems to have a special place for Natalya in his heart even though he thinks she's cold & heartless. Speaking of cold & heartless, ouch! Natalya really does know how to burn with ice. She's something alright. Rise & Scorpius are adorable too. I really hope they get together ;)

-Marissa

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Review #18, by marissa lily potterThe Whisper: 3.

3rd August 2012:
Hey there, marissa lily potter here with the review you requested! Another wonderfully written chapter! I loved it. It was so descriptive and got me exactly into the mindset of Dominique. I could relate to her, understand what she was going through and feel every emotion that she felt. I thought it was a marvellous chapter and your writing style, oh it's to die for.

I adore the way you write. It's so unique but so capturing. You grasp the reader's attention right away and keep it all the way until the end. Even when I reached the end of the chapter, I was scrolling down, looking for more! I love where this story is going. The plot is developing extremely well and the characters are too!

I think that the characters have come extremely far. They've been slowly developing. I love how you keep what you introduced to us then add on to define the characters better. I especially love Dominique. She is unique and very interesting. There were a very minor grammar and spelling errors here and there which can be easily fixed. One that really caught my eye was:

"and t just made her". I think you meant "it" instead of just the "t". The flow of the story is really good. Everything goes together so well. There aren't bits that are choppy or anything which is really lovely! I'm loving the way everything is forming together. It's perfectly understandable and the pace is really nice itself.

All in all, another great chapter! Feel free to request a review when you get another chapter up! :)

-Marissa

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Review #19, by marissa lily potterSeven Weddings: A Bloke.

3rd August 2012:
Ros is definitely something alright. I love how these girls can maintain their friendship even while they're blatantly rude to one another most of the time. It's interesting to say the least. I don't think I could ever have a friendship like that but it's fun to read about. Did you get this from real life experience or was it just something you made up? :) Heh, this chapter was funny... Delia's a bit sensitive, isn't she? Well, I can't wait to read more!

-Marissa

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Review #20, by marissa lily potterSeven Weddings: A Feast.

3rd August 2012:
Her roommates seem... interesting enough. Natalya's opinion of them seems to change very often though. I like them though in the annoying way. I'm sure they'll add a lot of flavour to the story. They seem like the type to help add drama ;) Albus and Natalya's relationship kind of seems unpredictable. I don't know what to say. And aww, poor Scorpius! Over all, lovely chapter :)

-Marissa

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Review #21, by marissa lily potterSeven Weddings: A Train.

3rd August 2012:
Well aren't Natalya and Albus just a pair of cuties? Haha, I think I like Rose and Scorpius a little bit better though. Those two sound adorable in their own way... I hope they do admit how they feel sooner or later. It would suck if they don't. I love how this story is playing out so far and I'm loving the development of Natalya. She's definitely a very interesting character!

-Marissa

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Review #22, by marissa lily potterSeven Weddings: A Dance.

3rd August 2012:
Oh Albus is just plain adorable. I always love Albus in every next gen fic even though he's always different. No matter what, Albus just happens to be adorable. I think he's definitely my favourite character so far and I would love to see him develop further throughout the story!

Oh man, the way Natalya treated poor Conrad was kind of mean... ok, maybe not kind of. It was really mean. I can't imagine anyone saying that to any guy even if they didn't like him... I don't know how she did it but I'm thinking that she has a lot of guts to be able to. That, or she really does not care haha.

-Marissa

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Review #23, by marissa lily potterSeven Weddings: A Wedding.

3rd August 2012:
From the summary of this story, I didn't quite know what to expect but I thought that after reading Ladylike. and Real Ladies, I should give this a shot too and let me tell you, I am glad I did! It's incredibly funny and the first chapter is just so intriguing! I love how you introduced the girls. I definitely like Rose but for some reason, I'm liking Delia too. I can relate to her from what you've given us so far ;) Awesome first chapter! I can't wait to see what you have in store for us :)

-Marissa

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Review #24, by marissa lily potterAn Interesting Turn of Events: Chapter 3

1st August 2012:
Hello again,

I thought this was a really cute chapter. I love how you're developing the characters & I can really appreciate that! It's nice to see things from a different perspective, and this perspective being James. The plot seems to be moving a little slowly but hey, it's only the third chapter, right? ;)

I'm glad that Remus and James had that talk. It's also nice to see that James is actually taking Remus' advice haha. It's cute the way he's been moping around after her. The chapter itself was very interesting and definitely entertaining. It caught my attention and kept it the whole way through. I like the friendship between Remus and Lily. It's pleasant to see that they can get along so well.

The characters are pretty interesting. I'm particularly interested in seeing Charlotte develop. She seems like a very unique character, especially the fact that she wants to go after Sirius Black, well that makes it very interesting. Honestly, I thought James' POV was an awesome addition. I like that we got to see his opinion. It really helps with understanding the characters.

All in all, it was a nice chapter that was entertaining and well written. Great work! :)

-Marissa

Author's Response: Yay!

So I'm really trying to create a more intricate plot and develop minor characters. Charlotte is so fun.

I'm happy you enjoyed James's pov because it was so fun to write and I think will help readers understand his motives and actions in later chapters.

I'm working on the fourth chapter and hope you will be willing to take a look at it when it's up.

As always, thanks so much for the review!!

~Caitlin


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Review #25, by marissa lily potterOpposites Attract: Prologue

1st August 2012:
Hey there, marissa lily potter here with the review you requested!

So I really like this chapter. It was cute, it was fun and it caught the reader's attention. I think you did a wonderful job starting it off and setting the storyline up. I like how you introduced Penny to the readers. She seems like a very relatable character which is nice, because then the readers really do feel a part of the story unlike someone who is too perfect which readers can't exactly relate to.

The flow of the story was okay. It could have been better because it did feel a little rushed and choppy, especially near the end where Penny and Tammy are making that agreement. It just felt a little rushed and you know, planned. I feel like this part at least should have been a little spontaneous because I don't think Penny had been thinking about it for a long time. That's how it feels though. Too planned.

I like your characters. I like how you've started off with one character that you've described really well but mentioned others in her life that will hopefully show up throughout the rest of the story. I'd like to see you develop your characters a little more. Give them some personality, background info and just generally more details into who they are. I really like Penny though from what I have read of her.

I think this was a wonderful first chapter and your story seems like it'll be an interesting and fun one. I wish you the best of luck with it! I really had fun reading it. I thought it was a great start and makes for a very interesting plotline! :)

-Marissa

Author's Response: Hi! thanks so much for taking the time to review it :)

Yeah, I've had problems with my OC characters cause they haven't had any flaws, so here's one where she has plenty :P

I tried to portray the problem of the Marauders as something that has bothered the two of them for a while now, but the agreement was supposed to be spontaneous, i'll read through it again and try to edit it though :)

Again, thank you so much for leaving this review! :D



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