Reading Reviews From Member: baletgir
424 Reviews Found

Review #1, by baletgirYes... I Am A Star : Meet Me in Hog's Head

3rd November 2016:
A proposal!? Well, that's unexpected and a bit extreme. After all the hesitation between them and how young they are, I can't see them, especially James, just jumping to this. It definitely makes things interesting, so I can see why you did it, but I do find find it a bit unbelievable.

I can't wait to know where this goes. Looking forward to the rest of this!

Author's Response: Yes, it was definitely a shock and unplanned. Honestly, I just started typing and that's what came out. It's completely unrealistic, but I feel like that's James! Since when has he ever been one to hold back? Amanda is still holding back, but she knows how she feels and it's just been a question of knowing how James feels. Now that they're both on the same page...
- Alex

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Review #2, by baletgirFallen: Pancakes

2nd November 2016:
Please update soon!!

I read all of complicated and this in the last week or so and I love them and I want more!!! Please please please update!

Author's Response: Oh yay I'm so glad you're enjoying it. New chapter should be up soon xx

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Review #3, by baletgirComplicated: In Which Happiness Can Be Easy

28th October 2016:
It seems I failed at trying to leave more reviews, and I deeply apologize at this fic truly deserves them. I loved every second of this. I got so into it that I didn't even realize this was the last chapter until I read your author's note at the end.

I am at a loss for words. I was very surprised by Cass's secret, so good job with that.

Great fic, that you so much!

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm so glad to hear you enjoyed it xx

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Review #4, by baletgirComplicated: In Which Louis Weasley Dances

24th October 2016:
Hi there!

So I've gotten through 13 chapters in 2 days because I am IN LOVE with this fic! This is wonderfully written and a good story line. I love a good cliche Next-Gen, but it's so refreshing to read something new. You still have all of the aspects of Next- Gen that I love, but you've added your own spin.

I'm sorry I haven't reviewed more, but I'll try to pause in my furious reading to leave some more soon.

Thank you for writing and sharing this!

Author's Response: Thank you! xx

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Review #5, by baletgirYear Five: Cleaner, More Brilliant

22nd October 2016:
I have no words. I am happy and sad. Yes, this was a satisfying ending and I understand why you ended it here, but I would love to read more. The parallel to Harry's story is such an imaginative concept and you've done it so well. I've also fallen in love with Tristan, Isobel, Emily, and Laurel and I want to know how their 6th and 7th years turn out.

All in all, an amazing story and so well written.

Thank you!

Author's Response: To be completely honest, I do have a lot of follow up sequel things I've worked on. Thing is, while they have moments I LOVE, I'm not sure if they really work out as complete stories. Year Five meant a lot to me, and it's still something I'm really proud of. I'd hate to try to follow it up and fail. (More importantly, I'm trying to focus on original fiction now).

But I will say, a big part of why I logged on today (after so long an absence) was an intense feeling of nostalgia for this story. Seeing these surprise reviews gave me so many squee feels!

If ever I do post more of the Y5 saga, it'll def be because of you and more reviews.

But I'm not promising anything!

Again, thank you so much!

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Review #6, by baletgirYear Five: After

22nd October 2016:
I'm sorry I haven't been leaving reviews, but I've been so wrapped up in this story that I wanted to keep going and going, but I need to tell you once again that this work is genius!

The little hints and easter eggs you leave through out are perfect, and while I like how you explain them, I love when I catch them before you point them out, but I'm glad you eventually do because I have missed quite a few.

Such an amazing story, I'm sad to move on to the last chapter.

Again, thank you for writing and sharing this.

Author's Response: Hee, it's a huge compliment that you got too wrapped up to review! THANK YOU :D I'm just so happy to know people are still reading and enjoying this book!


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Review #7, by baletgirYear Five: Behind the Mirror

20th October 2016:
I am SO in love with this fic! I am beyond words as to describe it. I love the little tid bits you include (how Fred & George learned about the kitchen?! Genius!) And I love the whole idea of using spells like drugs, it's ingenious!

This is such an original idea and an extremely intelligent piece, I feel as if my review could never do it justice.

My only note is that it seems too many people are involved in drugs, spells for personal use, and drinking. I know it's going to happen, but they're only 15 and 16, more of them must be straight edge. I'd expect Cedric to be more in line, though the twins do not surprise me. Again, I love the whole idea of it and I 100% believe this happened at Hogwarts to some extent.

Thank you so much for writing this and for sharing it! I shall gush more in future chapters and hope that I leave more intelligent reviews.

Author's Response: Hello! You have no idea what a surprising and amazing delight these reviews are! Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review!

About the pervasiveness of substance use - you're not wrong. There would probably be a lot more straight-edge-ness. I guess my thought was that this is the /one/ night of partying these secondary characters are gonna do all year. And for a lot of them, it might be their first wild rager. But is it /too/ big?


Here, I was sort of going on my own experience as a teenager, I guess? And honestly, I don't think my own demographic meets the probable demographic majorities at Hogwarts (many of whom are rural wizards :P). So you're probably entirely right about that.

Never EVER feel like your reviews aren't "enough"! This was such an amazing and heartening surprise, and I'm overjoyed that this story still has readers!

It really does mean so much to me!


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Review #8, by baletgirChasing Him: Epilogue

16th October 2016:
Hi There!

I just read your entire fic this weekend, it just hooked me in and I loved it! To be honest, you were right about the firs chapter being a bit slow, as I started to read this on Wednesday, gave up, but then came back on Friday only to finish it within 3 days.

I think you could add to the first chapter by showing more of the hurt Mae experienced as a 1st and 2nd year that lead to her plan. You mention it quite a bit towards the end, but you aren't very specific about it besides that she had no friends. I think it could be interesting set even more of that up early on.

Another comment, you give too much away in your author's notes. It wasn't helpful when early on you were apologizing for Mae using Freddie and then said she wasn't was all in your author's notes. It kind of ruined the intrigue and didn't give me a chance to consider that on my own.

All in all, you had a good plot, it kept me interested and it was fairly original, yet believable. I do have to say I rolled my eyes when Mae got pregnant, it's such an overused plot line, but you definitely made it less so with where you took it.

You had some small grammatical errors through out (mostly mixing up there, they're, and their and typos) which could easily be cleaned up with a read through or a second set of eyes to proofread for you.

Thank you for writing and posting it, as I had a fun time reading it!

Author's Response: Thank you so much for your review! I'm so glad that you enjoyed my story, I'm definitely going to take on board your advice and go back and fix up those errors! xx

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Review #9, by baletgirWith All Things: George, August 1998

14th October 2016:
You're back?! And better than ever!! You have no idea how often I've
checked back to see if you'd updated this. I know I'm not a big
reviewer, but I followed this religiously. I too disappeared from HPFF
for quite some time, butI usually came back for a week each year and
this was always one of the first fics I checked in on. I cannot wait for
new chapters as I love this fic so much!!

Happy writing!

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Review #10, by baletgirMy (Fake) Wedding: Epilogue

14th October 2016:
Hi There!

So, I read your entire fic this week. It hooked me from the start and I just needed to know what happened, I'm so glad it was completed and I didn't have to wait for chapter updates!

I love the plot. It is a bit cliche, but who cares? It got me reading and interested.

I can definitely tell that you wrote this in pieces over a long period of time as the writing greatly improves in the later chapters, and the epilogue is by far the most well written part. Through out the characters are a bit static, when they talk they over explain and say things that don't quite flow. They just don't talk quite like real people because you try really hard to explain everything. I completely understand being concerned that readers will mis things,but sometimes it's nice to leave things up to interpretation to your reader instead of spelling everything out for us. And if we miss it, it'll just make later things a bigger surprise- nothing wrong with that!

On the note of things being a bit unnatural, the whole wedding idea was a bit much for me. I cannot see Ginny asking them to get married that quickly and even if she did suggest it I don't see her pushing Elle so much. I think it would be completely believable for Elle to say she wanted a long engagement (especially since their "relationship" just went public) and for Ginny to then be okay with that. James hadn't ever met Elle's family! It's just too selfish of Ginny. I think your plot would have still worked without the pressure of the wedding, but it definitely would have been more difficult for you to get to some of the things you wanted to include.

Again, I really enjoyed your story line, thank you for sharing this!

:) BaletGir

Author's Response: First of all, congrats for reading it in an entire week! You deserve like a medal or something!

I know, I think because I'm quite bad with description etc. I think I over do it with my dialogue and over explain stuff I don't need to. I just want to include all the things in there. All of them!

Anyway, I have to politely disagree with your final paragraph. I feel like it is quite a integral part of the story. And I imagine Ginny sort of really quite excited that James has proposed and getting married in the future etc. Especially after the last relationship.

Thank you so much for putting your points across eloquently and politely instead of angrily or intimidatingly. It was definitely refreshing to say the least!

~Aimee xx

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Review #11, by baletgirI Don't Have a Choice (But I'd Still Choose You): Prince Charming

30th July 2016:
Just wondering, why is Fred alive if this is after the war?

Author's Response: It's addressed in chapter five. In my story, they are able to save his life. :)

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Review #12, by baletgiretc. etc. (and life goes on): Epilogue

24th July 2016:
I'm so sad this is over, but I am really glad you've stick with it and finished this! It is so sad how many people have disappeared from HPFF and abandoned fics (I'm just as guilty of this), so it's great to see someone who is still dedicated.

I always come back to HPFF when real life is less than stellar, and it's great to be able to come back to Harry Potter characters because they are like old friends.

This fic was wonderful, and I reread the entire thing before finishing it and I loved it just as much the second time around. There were so many great aspects that I can't even pick a favorite twist, but it was really real. I'm so glad that she didn't end up with Albus, too easy. And Janey burning down the newsroom? I never would have guessed that, I was shocked, but it was brilliant!

I hope you keep writing, I look forward to reading other fics by you in the future!

Author's Response: Thank you!! I'd feel waaay guilty leaving stories unfinished, if I got this far. I did very nearly give up at the end, but I'm so glad I didn't. The response I've gotten for the last few chapters have been so rewarding *u*

I love that a lot of the twists were really just Clemence's expectations going awry; she's mostly burned by herself or by risky situations she knowingly enters - her wonderful running theme. Albus, too, defies her expectations constantly, from his initial impression to his last one.

♥ thank you so much! ^__^

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Review #13, by baletgirYes... I Am A Star : Forgiving, But Not Forgetting

23rd July 2016:
So, I've read the entirety of this in the past week, and I must say, wow you've put a lot of time and effort into this. It is one long fic, and it was a nice read. I do have to point out that it was littered with typos and some spelling and grammatical issues, some of which even made parts difficult to understand. I know that there's a lot of pressure to write fast and post chapters, but take your time writing because getting rid of those typos would really elevate your story.

For a bit, I had a feeling Attie was going to end up being alive, but right when I believed she was truly dead, you brought her back. I can't decide what I think of it. I'm glad everyone is going to get their happily ever after (Amanda/James I'm sure will happen in the next chapter), but how she came back just seemed too hard to believe. I honestly thought it was her father disguising himself as her at first. Ultimately, I'm glad she's alive.

Happy Writing!

Author's Response: Thanks for the long review! I have gone through some of the earlier chapters and revised and I plan to do some revising when I finish. Thanks for understanding the pressure! I would love to hear which chapters were the worst with mistakes!

I really wanted to draw out those two weeks that Atria was gone and make readers believe Attie was dead so they knew how the other characters felt. It's completely unrealistic how Atria came back and how she acted, but that's just Atria. I'm also trying to wrap up this story so there are some loose end that I might tie up off screen.

Thanks for the great review! - Alex

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Review #14, by baletgirThe Last Time: Chapter 5.

28th July 2015:
Wait that's the end!?!?! Darn it, now I need to find something else! But great story, I really enjoyed it. Dramione can be really unbelievable and plain ridiculous, I appreciate how real this was and how believable it was. Great job, I'm off to your author page to see what else you've written.


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Review #15, by baletgirThe Last Time: Chapter 4.

28th July 2015:
So I've been an HPFF member for AGES! And I go through phases. I was a committed member for a number of years after DH, but real life gets in the way and such. When I need an escape, I come back, and it's always a fun adventure to find out what stories are currently popular, see what has been updated ( and sadly what has been abandoned that I was following) but I always start something new when I "come back" to HPFF. I choose your fic this time (about 2 weeks ago I returned) and I am really happy I found this fic. It's really interesting, and I keep checking for updates, and I love how quickly you're updating! I definitely see myself sticking around for awhile, if only to see your fic through. So thank you for writing this and for continuing it no matter how many reviews you have. Just remember someone is always reading (and someone is always waiting).


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Review #16, by baletgirUnexpected Parenthood: Chapter Fifty: Epilogue

27th November 2014:

So it being a Holiday and me hating holidays and family, I went on a reading spree- as in I read all 50 chapters in the last 24 hours. Now I'll be honest I read Chapters 1 & 2 about 2 weeks ago and stopped because I just wasn't thrilled with the quality of your writing to be honest. I liked the story line, but it just wasn't coming across well to me.

Now, I gave it another chance yesterday, and while the writing didn't really grow on me, I did enjoy the storyline enough to not care as much as I had originally. That being said, this story needs some serious editing. Is English your first language? There are some nuances through out the were off, such as sayings that were a bit backwards or mis-worded, and there were sentences, that while they made sense, they weren't all that eloquent. Now, I am American, so if you are British, some of the issues I had might have been the differences in the languages, but I'm pretty aware of most of the differences between British English and American English.

There were parts that were just clunky and heavy. Over telling almost. For example, when Scorpius was introduced as "my best gay friend that isn't actually gay" it could have been a smoother introduction, the reader doesn't need the whole explanation then and there, maybe have her say "My best gay friend!" and then have Scorpius say "When will you ever stop considering me gay?!" or "Will you ever let that go?" and then later in the story when you brought it up again you could give the background to the statement (and leave it as an interesting thing in the back of your readers' minds).

Again, I liked the story, and you had some good hints through out- I guessed pretty early that Dom and Scorpius were hooking up, but you kept me second guessing myself as well.

Again, I recommend an in depth edit, I'd be happy to help if you're interested (I'm baletgir on the forums as well).

Loved the plot, it just needs some finishing touches! Also, can you label the stories that are sequels/companions in their summaries? a lot of the fics on your author page sound like they might relate, but I'm not sure.

Author's Response: Hi baletgir,

50 chapters in a day, you're crazy haha. I started writing this two years ago so compared to later chapters, my writing has obviously changed. The first few chapters even I aren't that fond of now and I've edited them but still to me, they're still a bit weird to re-read.

Thank you for giving it another chance, this story is my baby as it's my longest to date and as I said I had been writing it for two years so it played a bit part of life in that time. I have done edits numerous times and I myself am happy with things, so I'm sorry you feel that way. English is my native Language but as I live in Wales (part of the UK) we do have slightly different English dialect to those in England. I say certain things different to those in England so that might perhaps have something to do with things.

I admit it's possible they could and I may go back over and revise that chapter now you've pointed it out, but to me when I was writing it, it sounded fine. I'm still doing edits now on later chapters so I shall look back at that chapter.

Thank you! This story has been my baby and I love it so much, haha. There were definitely hints, haha and when I wrote them I wondered how quick people would pick up on then. I'm glad you got them pretty early, haha. There were things to keep you guessing along the way.

Thank you for the offer, dear. I've nearly finished edits now but I will keep it in mind if I do change my mind. I have the same penname on the forums too, if you want to find me or have any questions.

So far there are three stories which link to this one. 'Heat of the Moment' which is Teddy/Victoire and in my eyes how they get together. 'When Your Whole World Comes Crashing Down' is Rose/Scorpius and is about how they became friends, got into a relationship and then broke up. And recently I've just put up 'Catastrophe Waiting To Happen' which is a continuation of Dom/Scorpius from the epilogue of this. I can't always fit it into the summary, but there are Author's notes, stating that they link to this if that helps.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!

Sophie :)

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Review #17, by baletgirDizzy: Dizzy

3rd August 2014:
Hi AdinaPuff,

I am thrilled that you were so inspired and wrote this so quickly!

I like how it was character driven and that you focused on 2 people, usually any more than 2 backstories in a chapter confuses me (I have a bad memory). Now I'm a little confused, is Sweets her actual name? Or is it a nickname? Either way, I like it, just wondering.

So you mentioned that one would see Sweets in your NaNo, does that mean that this exact part will be incorporated? If so, I think its a lovely piece that really gives nice fluff about your characters and lets the reader see how the interact. But if it is meant to be completely stand alone, I feel it needs a little more. It definitely was fluffy, so I'm not saying it needed a conflict, but just a bit more than (really good) character development. For example, I thought Freddie was going to propose when he got down on his knees joking, but then I realized that they were already married, so couldn't happen. Maybe making this scene their engagement would give it more purpose.

Overall, it would be a great filler chapter/section, and I really enjoyed reading this. I would love to learn more about sweets! And btw, I love the fact that Freddie seems to be in charge/owner of the Joke shop.

Thanks again for entering the challenge!

Author's Response: Hi!

Thanks so much for the kind review. It was just a fluffy fun piece, wasn't really meant to have too much substance. The focus was her pregnancy, and her preparing herself to tell him. You know? But I understand when you say it needs more.



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Review #18, by baletgirWith All Things: Angelina, April 1996

26th November 2012:
Yay! An update! I hate how infrequently I leave you a review, to be honest I'm not sure if I ever have, but I follow your fic intensely and am always waiting for an update. I love this piece so much. I think you've nailed everything on the head, from the characters, to the plot, to the structuring (which I absolutely love), and keeping it canon. I admire you for this piece immensely. I absolutely love it, so please do not ever stop!

Author's Response: A review is a review and for that I am grateful!! I'm bowled over that you follow the fic and wait for new updates -- it's really surreal hearing that. I'm so so glad that you enjoy this story and this chapter. The structure was something I had been keen to try well before it even occurred to me to write about George and Angelina, so I'm glad it ended up suiting the story so well.

Thank you, and I hope you continue to enjoy it!!

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Review #19, by baletgirHonour Among Thieves: a fight, injuries, and the failure of a plan

7th April 2012:
Hm. I want to know whats going on with all the mystery! I am really really enjoying this so much!

I Am so glad you thought of this story line. Its so different and unique, who thought the great Harry Potter's children and nieces and nephews could be thieves?! Its so interesting to read!

I love it!

Author's Response: I'm glad you like it. I was worried it might be enitrely too OOC for people to like it... but maybe because it's so OOC that people do? :P

Thanks for the review, and you'll have to keep reading if you want to find out about the mystery! :D

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Review #20, by baletgirHonour Among Thieves: some rain, a traitor and nothing going to plan.

5th April 2012:
I love this even more now, and I didn't think that was possible! I love the intrigue of the mysterious phone call. I can't wait to find out who it was.

You writing is very good! I enjoy everything and anything you say has a purpose. There isn't anything unnecessary or tedious. But there are still adequate details and descriptions, you've just found the perfect balance for which i commend you, it is a difficult thing to do!

Your characters are wonderful, though I have to admit I can't really remember each of their bios/jobs from the opening of the previous chapter. It doesn't seem to hinder me in reading this, and it was a lot of information all at once so, I'm sure I'm not the only one. I wish I could remember each person's specific area of expertise, but its not that big of a deal!

Good job! I cannot wait to read on!

Author's Response: Ach, don't worry, I forget who is who. I know Rose, Lysander, Lorcan and James for sure... the rest I have to look up :P

Thanks, this story is fairly challenging to write- I want to make it action-packed, but there are always things that need to be said.

Hopefully I shall have the next chapter up before you get to the end of the story! Thanks so much for the review xx

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Review #21, by baletgirHonour Among Thieves: an introduction, a party and the beginnings of a plan

5th April 2012:
OMG, I am so glad I read this! I absolutely love this so far! You can expect me to probably read more than the 2 more chapters I will be reviewing for your challenge prize!

This is such an original idea for next-gen, which is something I'm always looking for! This is really exciting me! I think its great the way you started the story with this introduction chapter. We met all the main characters and saw the main plot of the story. It obviously pulled me in! And it got me super excited too!

I think your writing was really good, and I am super excited to read more!

Author's Response: YAYAYAYAYAYAY!

SO GLAD YOU LIKE IT! I have ensnared another into my evil story-trap... mwa ha ha ha ha ha... *cough*

I'm glad you thought it was original, and that the starting bit was interesting- I was worried people would see it and evaporate from boredom :D

Thanks for the review! :D

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Review #22, by baletgirBroken Hearts: Safe and Sound

3rd April 2012:
I am so sorry it has taken me so long to get to your review for second place in my challenge! I feel awful! I am planning to get them all done by the end of the weekend at the latest!

Now, on to this lovely piece! This was beautifully written! Your details and descriptions were amazing and I felt as if I were there with her. I never thought of the state of the world when Lucius and Narcissa got married, and the possibility that Lucius only joined Voldemort to for safety reasons. It makes sense, though I'm not sure if I want to believe that Lucius isn't all that bad after all. Haha.

Usually a fic with a lack of dialogue drags for me. I have difficulty reading everything and I usually skim, but that was the absolute last thing I wanted to do with this piece! I wanted to devour every bit and for it to continue on forever. Great job!

Author's Response: Don't worry about it- RL can be evil sometimes :D

I'm glad you like it, and that you really identified with Narcissa :) It was a challenge to write, but I'm glad it came through.

I personally believe that Lucius and Narcissa were entirely bent on self-preservation when they joined the Death Eaters. If they thought the Order would win, then I'm sure they would have squashed any blood-purity ideals they had and would have joined the Order. I wanted to reflect that in this- hopefully by making Lucius seem pretty spineless and reflecting Narcissa's doubt in his choice.

Lack of dialouge usually makes me want to vom too, so I paragraphed loads to make it all broken up and not one massive chunk of text! Glad you liked the way it read :)

Thanks for such a lovely review :D

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Review #23, by baletgirBecoming Parents: Plague

17th March 2012:
Wow. That was intense. I do not like how Draco and Hermione are yelling so much in front of their daughters. Children learn everything from their parents and something like that at such a young age could be very impressionable. And it just sets a standard for Hermione and Draco. Hermione is seeming extremely OOC to me. Draco, I can't really pinpoint whether or not I like him, but he;s okay in terms of characterization.

I think you've really got the realism down. That is really a strong part for you when it comes to writing. You write things that are real!

I loved ROn coming back. I think his and Hermione's relationship is so intriguing!

Author's Response: Intense indeed my dear(: I'm sorry you don't like it. I don't know what else to say to your comment:P

Thanks! Erh...Ron...and thats all I have to say about that.



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Review #24, by baletgirBecoming Parents: Lake House Part 1

17th March 2012:
Interesting. Very interesting. Were Harry and Ginny acting weird because they invited Ron? Do they like Draco?

I really like that you had this little disagreement between Draco and Hermione. Again, it was very realistic. And I can understand both of their sides.

I think you should remember that they are Wizards. Why are they drinking beer? Why not Firewhisky or Butterbeer? I think your fic looses a bit of the wizarding world in it sometimes. There are just a few too many Muggle things for me. But I'm a J.K. Rowling purist, so I always think there aren't enough Wizard references!

Author's Response: Interesting! Well,interesting is good!

Me too, yet I side with Draco. Of curse, I'm not a Ron fan.

Hm...I don't know! I'm just a bit too rednecked american.sigh!



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Review #25, by baletgirBecoming Parents: Long Days

17th March 2012:
I never ever want to have kids. Never! I don't care how cute and cuddly they look, they are too much work! haha. It seems like you might have a lot of experience with babies from reading this. It all seemed horribly real.

I cannot believe Draco left Hermione with the babies for that long. I'm sorry but he is not a good father or husband. Hermione better tell him so, and I hope he gets his act together.

I see you responded about having had your chapters beta'd and just haven't updated them, if I were you I'd get on that. No offense, but this chapter was riddled with even more typos and silly spacing errors than the last two. It was a bit annoying to be perfectly honest.

I liked the point of view change, but Draco's POV seemed a bit rushed. It was just kind of like you were going over the events that happened, and weren't trying to invite your reader into his story. Also, the change from one POV to the other was a bit awkward. I think that the best way to change POVs is to have each chapter be a single person, and change it between chapters. Just a thought!

Author's Response: Me neither! I get you there! I really don't... I was terribly young when my siblings were born so I only have a couple months of babysitting under my belt. But I remember those long nights quite vividly.

He isn't! But he will be better! Because I can't stand him like this!

I am sorry.

Yes! That is so hard! I need to work on it!



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