Reading Reviews From Member: MrsKatieGrint
  
278 Reviews Found

Review #26, by MrsKatieGrintSomething Worth Fighting For: Chapter 1

2nd December 2013:
Hey there! KatieRoo from the forums here with your review!

Okay, wow. This was seriously such a great start. You seemed to have everything laid out, and its just beautiful.

Your descriptions are wonderful. And your flow just seems so natural. I think this is such an engaging beginning, and I know I can't wait for more.

The emotion surrounding Ginny and Harry is really realistic too. Its just so smooth, but definitely believable.

I think you did a great job writing about Fred's funeral. It was bittersweet.

All in all, I think this was a really superb chapter, and I think your insecurities should just disappear because this is wonderful!

Author's Response: Katie!
Thank you so much for your kind words :D I hope I can keep creating an interesting story for you and I truly do hope you continue to read and enjoy it in the future :D
THANK SO MUCH
Christy


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Review #27, by MrsKatieGrintWildflowers: They Suited Her

2nd December 2013:
Hey there! KatieRoo from the forums here with your review!

First off, I'm so sorry for the delay! Thanksgiving, finals, blah blah blah. But, I am here now, so onward with your requested review!

Okay, so I actually have never read a Charlie/Hermione fic before, but I was quite impressed. It was so sweet, and your characters were just darling.(:

Although I did enjoy this one-shot, there are a couple things I would suggest. I think that when you change between the characters thinking/speaking, you should make that a little clearer. Some points are really hard to tell that you've done this, until you read over the sentences a couple of times. Also, I think you should elaborate more. In the beginning, everything is quite detailed and beautiful, and then you drift off a bit, and things seemed to get rushed, and you stop painting the picture.

All in all I think you did a wonderful job. The idea of the story, and how its laid out is beautiful.

Wonderful job!(:

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review! I totally understand.. Busy time, busy time. I'm glad that the first time you read Charlie/Hermione you're not disappointed. They're a seriously under-appreciated pair that I love so much so I HAD to write about them.
Thank you for the pointers. I'm definitely planning to make edits while I make a sequel.
You're lovely..
--Carla


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Review #28, by MrsKatieGrintGravel on the Ground: From the Ashes: Prologue

2nd December 2013:
Hey there! KatieRoo from the forum here with your review!

First off, I'm so sorry for the delay! Its been super crazy with Thanksgiving this past week, and finals coming up, I've just been all over the place!

Anywho, wow, okay seriously, I have all of Charmed on DVD box sets, so I'm super pumped to see how this will ultimately play into your story!(:
I think you have the right idea, and so far, I don't see canon being a problem for you. i really didn't get to see much of this original character you have created here, but the glimpses I got, I'm seriously amazed.

I think your style of writing in general is just beautiful. You have a wonderful way with words and describing things. The feelings are there to, and it makes your story very believable.

I'm personally so intrigued to see how you're going to go with this story, your start is super great, and I can't wait to read more!(:

Author's Response: Hello!

And I must echo your first paragraph and apologize for being super busy and taking forever to respond to this review! I'm so very sorry!

Hey, glad you like the small Charmed connection. It won't be a huge part of the story, more just a concept that I'm borrowing, but I still love that you like it.

Thanks! I am trying really hard to stick to canon as much as I can, given I'm inserting an OC into the middle of it. It will get harder as I go, though, and we delve into the books.

Aw, thank you! That means a lot. I get really worried that my writing stinks, especially when I read all the other great writers out there. Encouragement is always welcome!

I don't know if you still have a review thread, but I will look and see and maybe you would still be interested in reading more.

Thanks again!


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Review #29, by MrsKatieGrintAs Starling Fades: Rumour Number 1

1st December 2013:
Hey there!

First off, I apologize for the delay! I've been studying for finals and a crazy week.

Anywho, I think this is a lovely start. Starling is such a realistic character, and I love the way she just is. Obviously, I'm not a celebrity, but I think you did a great job capturing that personality and the challenges they face.

Also, I love how this Next Gen is set past Hogwarts. I love that they're all grown up and I little more mature. Its just a good time period you have the characters set in.

I think your characterization, and the plot theme you have going on is great. The dialogue is really well, and It just flows so nicely. I think you have just the right amount of mystery going on to keep the readers hooked.

I personally don't see why you couldn't continue, I think this was a strong start. I think your insecurities should be minuscule, because this really was a great chapter!

Feel better about this, because like you said, you have a good idea, and I'm sure others would love to read this too!(:

Author's Response: Hi!
And it's no trouble!
Real life gets in the way sometimes - I would know!

I'm so glad you like the start of this! And that Starling is realistic! And yay! I'm glad I could really capture her!

And yes, I'm currently writing two (I think?) Next Gen stories during Hogwarts, so I tried to do something different than what I'm used to, so I'm glad it worked!

And I'm super glad that everything that I have so far flows nicely and that I have that air of mystery!

And thank you so much! This really means a lot and perhaps I can get started on the next chapter soon.

Thank you so much, as I said before this means so much!
Lo:)


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Review #30, by MrsKatieGrintThrough The Darkest: A Case Worth Waiting For

20th November 2013:
Hey there! KatieRoo from the forums here with your review!(:

Wow, you have some great descriptive scenes here. Really, they are utterly amazing. And definitely beautiful.

This story is definitely gripping. I have a suspicion that the women in the beginning is Ginny, but wow. She was harsh!
I think you definitely have the right ideas in the right places, I think you just some smoother transitions. When you transit from one scene to another, its very abrupt, and almost staggering. I think you just need to work on closing the scenes better.
You definitely have the right ideas, and they're in the right spots, its just too short.

All in all, I think this story has a wonderful start, and I can't wait to see this resolved!
Cheers, Katie

Author's Response: Hello! :D That was really quick!

I'm glad you liked the story, overall. I meant to write a gripping first chapter, so your review makes me smile... :) :)

I know this was a bit short, but I promise the future chapters will be longer. =] I'll look at the closing scenes ASAP.

Thanks for the review! It really made my day... :)

Ashwini


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Review #31, by MrsKatieGrintIn Sickness And In Health: Healing in Hell?

20th November 2013:
Hey Grace!

Wow, what a great background story. How on earth did you even think of something like this?
This is brilliant. You did a great job covering loopholes, and did great explaining what all happened. Your flow was on point. Really well.

I think your characterization was better, and very realistic! You do a great job of characterizing Hermione, and I think almost a better job of Draco. Kudos there!(:

This story is definitely keeping me on the edge of my seat, I think you're doing great!
Cheers! Katie

Author's Response: Hiya Katie!

Um... that's a good question! I honestly can't remember, it has just jumped into my mind, and written itself from there really!

I'm glad i explain every alright! I do get worried because its a lot of dialogue and a lot to take in in one go, so knowing it makes sense is good :D

Oh good, characterisation is something that I can struggle with, so I am glad that it is doing okay so far.

Yay!! Can't wait to see what you think about the next chapter :D

Grace


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Review #32, by MrsKatieGrintThis Is Not A Love Story: Part 1

19th November 2013:
Hey there!

So, no shame, I was totally creeping on your page, and stumbled upon this story. First, I love Rick Riordan, so I've definitely been checking up on that challenge, to see all the great stories!

I think you did superb with your OC, she's so cute.
Might I add, I love the fact that Albus is in Ravenclaw! This was such a nice twist to your story, that I positively adored!
Anywho, I think also that its really great you didn't make Albus the cliche womanizer, I think it was cute how sweet he was to Claudia. Seriously adorable, in fact.

I can't wait to see where their ice cream adventure takes them next, because seriously, this story was adorable in everyway.(:

Cheers! Katie(:

Author's Response: Hi!

And absolutely no shame! That's how I found a lot of my favourite stories ;)

And you totally should check out the other stories! I bet they're all fantastic (not that I've had time to read them all... NaNo *she growls*)

And yay! I'm so glad you like Claudia! And yay again for Ravenclaw Albus! I just always pictured him as a Ravenclaw in this context because of how it ends, but I'm glad I twisted! ;)

And cliche womanizer? I always saw James as the womanizer and Albus more laid-back, kind of like Ginny (James is popular with the opposite gender) and Harry (I think he's kissed two girls in his life?).

And I know, how sweet is he? I wanted to make them this completely adorable couple, so I'm glad I succeeded!

And yay for adorableness, and, although I won't be going into detail on the ice cream fiasco, I think you'll be pleasantly surprised with where I take them next. ;)

Thanks so much!
Lo:)


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Review #33, by MrsKatieGrintNot Normal: {Chapter the Fourth}

19th November 2013:
Pls excuse me while I dance happily around my apartment for ten minutes.

Haha no, really, I'm so happy your muse came back and you could finally write another great/crazy/interesting Albus filled chapter!;D

Okay, so have I mentioned how much I adore your descriptive words? Forreal, I felt like I was in the library, seeing everything Ellie was. It was incredible!

Going to your concerns, I'm still fan-girling over here because of Albus, so I definitely think his characterization is on point. I love how arrogant he is, and he's a bit snarkey, but I think thats what makes him so charming.(;
Also, I was literally laughing out loud when Ellie and Albus were going at it. Seriously, my cat was staring at me like I was crazy, haha. Regulus is definitely a hoot too. He loves to stir things up, obviously, and I think he's hilarious!

Personally, I noticed the tone change, but what kind of english major would I be if I didn't? Although, I think the tone change is for the better. To me, it signifies that your comfortable now in the thought that everyone knows your characters, so you don't have to explain much about them, making the tone more relaxed, and calm, especially when concerning the characters.
Your tone definitely went from everly explaining,(which wasn't bad, your story just needed it because of the OC's you were introducing) to a relaxed story telling tone. Which is definitely great, because now you can get to the good stuff easier now!(:

You really did a great job, especially after coming back from a break. I think you did wonderful! And I can't wait to see the mess Ellie will get herself into next, and hopefully Albus is around too.:P

Cheers, as always! Katie!(:

Author's Response: Aww! Thank you so much!

No one is happier than me about the return of my muse - like you cannot believe how happy I was to get this chapter to a place where I was satisfied enough to publish it.

I tried harder with the description in this chapter, so I'm really happy that you think it worked.

I'm glad someone likes Albus because he's a pain to write - someone should like him, because I sure don't! And my dog stares at me funny all the time. His eyes say, "What is wrong with you human that feeds me?"

You like the tone change? I'm glad - I'm not sure how I feel about it, nor am I confident that I can keep it consistent. It might have just been a sort "just for this chapter" kind of thing. I think at least for the next chapter there won't be much explaining because we get to see Ellie learn things, which will be nice.

Thanks for this lovely review once again!


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Review #34, by MrsKatieGrintA Moment of Fear: Remus

19th November 2013:
Wow, what a hard ending.

I definitely delayed reading this chapter because its over, but I don't think you could've done a better job with the ending.

Wow, definitely interesting to see things from Remus' view. I think his fear was the most tangible, as it was a 'fear' Harry had all through the books. Interesting to see that Remus too had the same fear.

Again, I love the dialogue between all of them. You have a fantastic way with words.(:

The flow and pace of this chapter was phenomenal too, it definitely gave that ending vibe that we all needed.

Again, this was fantastic, and I'm so glad you had me review all the chapters, because I definitely loved this story, and sadly, probably wouldn't have stumbled upon it myself. But, thankfully, you asked for a review, and here I am, seven chapters later!:D
Great job once again, this was beautiful, every bit of the way!(:

Author's Response: Hi!!!

Uh, I'm beyong happy you liked the ending. It was hard to write. I felt a little death at not just finishing the story but writing an extremely sad part of it.

I thought the way Remus caught onto Harry's fear was a bit significant. He seemed too something to have a temporal or situation based fear.

ah, thank you so much! I really enjoyed writing their dialogue - so I'm quite glad it hit you right!

I'm quite glad you enjoyed reading this and that my constant re-requests weren't the bane of your life! :D

Thank you so much for such awesome reviews and feedback.

-Rose


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Review #35, by MrsKatieGrintIn Sickness And In Health: The Battle

19th November 2013:
Hey there! KatieRoo from the forums here with your review!:D

Okay, wow. Definitely was not expecting any of that after reading the summary! It was great though, and I'm definitely intrigued by all of this.

I like how you disregarded the DH, but, did an excellent job of not straying too far from cannon. The battle was such an interesting scene for me to have read, especially from a prospective other than Harry's. Really great job there!(:

I think you have Hermione down to a tee. And I think Draco is pretty great too, although, I suggest making him more of a mystery, because right now you have him as an open book, and he definitely is anything but easily read.
I am confused in one aspect only, you have no mention of Ron, except when Hermione is talking to Ginny and mentions traveling with two goons. Is everything okay there? Or do we just find out more in later chapters?

Anywho, I personally don't get the rushed vibe, after all, your climax is the battle, therefore it is action packed. You can't have action written slowly, or it just takes away from the actions, so think your flow is great!

All in all, I think you did a great job, and I'd love to read more! Feel free to request again!(:

-Katie

Author's Response: Hi Katie! Thank you so much for reviewing!! :D

I am happy you enjoyed this, it's a bit different from Cliche Dramione that's for sure!

I have tried my upmost not to stray from canon, both in events and in characters. J.K Rowling made such an amazing world, I am just expanding on it :P

Oh really? Good to know the characters are real! I do think there is more that I can do to make Malfoy much more mysterious, so will look into that. You are right, there is so little on Ron spoken about in this!! I will have to add more of him, i didn't even realise it, thank you for pointing that out!

Oh really? Yusss!! It was supposed to be action packed but I know that can be made to be rushed. So I am glad it didn't happen!

Awww, yaay!! I am so very thrilled that you like it!! I will definitely rerequest!! (Or I may have already, hehe :P)

Thank you again for a lovely review :D

Grace


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Review #36, by MrsKatieGrintThat Idiotic Act: Really Quite Splendid

18th November 2013:
Hey there! KatieRoo from the forums here with your review!

Okay, so, this might be the perfect example of a non-cliche Molly Weasley! I am so happy that this poor girl is more than the cookie-cutter that everyone describes her as!

I think your characterization of all of your characters are wonderful! They are super realistic, and have life, they're not just words on a screen.:P

Your flow is great too, not too fast or too slow, you did a great job there.

Also, the dialogue between the characters? Hilarious. Forreal, I was laughing so much there!

I personally, didn't really see anything that wanted to make me rip my hair out, so thats a plus.
I would suggest though, going back and rereading, as you have a ton of commas in unnecessary places.

All in all, I think this a well thought out great begging to a story I'm sure is going to be just delightful! Cheers!(:

Author's Response: Thank you so much! It really means so much to me! Especially from an English major and such a great author! I really could not picture Molly as a carbon copy of Percy, I think having a strict parent will put you off being like them... So I just really did what I thought she'd be like :)

Thank u so much! It really really made my day!!


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Review #37, by MrsKatieGrintA Twist of Time: A Lavender Breeze

18th November 2013:
Hi there!

So I think you have a really good start here. I'm really interested into how this parallel universe is going to be!

A couple things I noticed, feel free to ignore them though! Harry and Ron never returned to Hogwarts, as they were both offered positions at the ministry, and they accepted.
Neville wasn't a prefect in the books, therefore, he couldn't be head boy. Also, when Hermione was standing on the balcony, you say that Draco whispers, "welcome back, mudblood." And Hermione hears, how is that? lol just a bit misleading with word there.
I haven't actually read a story about parallel universe though, so I'm super excited to see how this turns out.

I think this story has a ton of potential, there is so much you can do in a parallel universe! Just imagine all!

Geez, I'm just super pumped by this great idea you have here!(:

Author's Response: Thanks so much for your review! I'm so glad that you find the idea of a parallel universe interesting. I've always been fascinated with the idea so I've really enjoyed thinking about how things would be different for Hermione in this new world.
Oh and thanks for pointing out those things. I really do appreciate feedback like this because it helps me get an objective view on what readers might be confronted with when reading my story. I have added an author's note to my chapter stating that my story takes place at the end of Deathly Hallows, but before the Epilogue... I really wanted to change a few things (like Harry and Ron joining Hermione) so hopefully that clears things up. And you make a good point about the initial Hermione Draco scene lol - I've altered it so that although she doesn't "hear" it - she knows exactly what he's said. It's so funny how some things can just slip your notice when you're writing - I appreciate your keen eye for detail :) Thanks again!!


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Review #38, by MrsKatieGrintA Moment of Fear: Sirius

18th November 2013:
Wow, such an interesting twist from your other chapters. I like it!(:

I like the fact that Sirius doesn't have an exact fear. I almost believe that his emotions are all over the place for him to actually have any fear.

I love how you would go back in forth in his head/sanity. It just again goes to show the bond that James and Sirius shared. It was heartwarming to think about how much Sirius actually cared for James.

As a whole, I really still love the idea of your story. I love how its actually occurring chronologically, and that the 'fear' each character have, is just mind numbing almost. Its weird to think, but definitely true when you stop to think about it.

You also really keep things interesting on how you write each chapter. I think you have a different flair for each chapter, but its still written in the same style, does that make sense? Lol, its really awesome just reading through, and totally geeking out as the english major I am.

Great job, once again, you have outdone yourself!(: Cheers!

Author's Response: Hello!!!

Ah, I'm glad you liked how this one changed up a bit.

His chapter was a bit harder to work with because of the quote. I couldn't think of a discrete fear for Sirius either so having him all over the place with emotions felt like the best direction for this part.

The James/Sirius scenes were partly a plot device to keep some sense of flow and continuity. I also wanted to show their relationship as Sirius' anchor to reality.

:D You might be the first person to comment on the story happening chronologically. It was a bit of the complexity I wanted to add to the overall plot arch.

I think I know what you mean with the voice staying the same but the style/implementation of the narrative varied. I wanted to have the feel of an omniscient narrator but with different pizzazz each time. It's kind of awesome that I have been able to make you geek out.

Thank you so much for another awesome review!!

-Rose


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Review #39, by MrsKatieGrintA Moment of Fear: Snape

16th November 2013:
Oh geez, take my heart and rip it out, why don't you?

I think its safe to say that most fans after reading the DH became mega fans of Lily/Snape, and I would put myself in that category, except their aren't many good FF out there like that.

Again, I just love this. Its perfect, and everybody knows that was Snape's fear, losing Lily to the Dark side he was apart of at the time.
I think the part that got me, was when he was thinking about their future. #tear

This was again, another crazy insight, just like Voldemort, and I think you wrote this fabulously. I really liked this one too, even though it wasn't action packed, it certain was emotionally packed.

The feeling and atmosphere of this chapter is just wonderful, and kinda wraps you in. Its just crazy, your attention to detail.

As always, I love love loved this, it was beautiful.(:
Cheers!

Author's Response: Hello!!

I do like ripping hearts out... it's an unfortunate hobby of mine. :)

I didn't become a huge fan of Lily/Snape but I do like people trying to write them. I feel that it's a very lopsided ship.

Snape's fear felt so singular to me. I mean, he was rather fearless in the books but it was definitely fear/love that drove him to the Order. I've read a few fics (don't remember where/when) where Snape and Lily ended up together after James died (it was AU). It was such a twisted hope but fit Snape so well.

I'm blushing a bit - Snape isn't someone I'm confident writing so it's really amazing to hear that I got him down well. This chapter was certainly packed with the feels. More so than the previous ones (but not as much as the last two).

The atmosphere was meant to be sad and engulfing - I'm so glad to hear that's how it hit you.

Thank you so much for a wonderful review. You've really made me elated. :D

-Rose


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Review #40, by MrsKatieGrintA Minor Setback: The Second Chapter

14th November 2013:
Hey there again!

So, I think was a great update. Your details to certain things were super cute, and I love Seraphina's humor! haha she's a hoot!
She's so awkward, and cold, I just love it.

I'm glad her and Albus kinda talked? Lol not much, but atleast they're 'friends', and on regular speaking terms? I hope, after all, she is having his baby!

I hope she ends up telling him soon, because otherwise it looks like Lily will, yikes!
Okay, that seriously was probably the most awkward experience Lily will ever overhear, for real. How ofter do you hear that your brother got a girl pregnant before he even knew!

Oh well! All in all, I still think you did a great job on this update. I really can't wait to see what all happens! Cheers again!

Author's Response: Heyo! Responding to your review kind of late but I'm here!

I'm glad that you found Seraphina funny, one of my concerns while writing is that she's too serious to be funny. And you know, it's quite fun making her awkward and cold, I've no idea why but I'm glad that you enjoyed it!

Well they're definitely on speaking terms and on their way to being friends, they're just not there yet.

We shall see who spills the beans on the pregnancy as the story goes on! Who knows who's going to tell!

Thanks for the lovely review!


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Review #41, by MrsKatieGrintTime Marches On: ...tick...tock...

14th November 2013:
Hi there!

So I definitely put this story on a list of mine to personally read, when I got the time, but since you requested, I'm so happy I got to take this on sooner rather than later.:D Yay.

So I should have probably mentioned in my bio that I adore Fred/George fics to the moon and back twice over. They are probably my favorite when written well. And yours was super fantastic, like forreal, I was tearing up there quite a bit. Your writing is super fabulous. It seemed just like the thing George would do. I definitely love the emotion going on in this one-shot. It was so realistic, I swear if I could reach through my computer and give George a hug, I totally would!

I think this was such a powerful, and moving one-shot. I almost didn't want it to end, because of how swept up I was in it. It was seriously beautiful, and definitely tear jerking.

I think your plot, and story characterization was stunning. Just stunning. It flowed so soothingly, and nicely, and I just loved the way everyone acted, and the way you portrayed them.

This was seriously one of the best one-shots I've ever read, definitely favoriting this!(:
Really, superb job deary!

Cheers! Katie(:

Author's Response: Hi!

Man...so many compliments here...:o

I don't know how to respond if I'm honest, how can I respond to that? Well I'm so pleased you enjoyed it, especially since you adore Fred/George fics to the moon and back!

Powerful was defiantly what I was going for as was my top secret ploy to try and make somebody cry! ;)

I struggle with characterization so much so thanks a lot!

YOU FAVOURITED IT! HOLY ELDER WAND :O

;)

thanks for the review, it was amazing :D


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Review #42, by MrsKatieGrintA Moment of Fear: Voldemort

14th November 2013:
Hey there!

Oh wow, definitely was not expecting that.
This was just crazy, for real, this just blew my mind. One, I knew Voldemont feared Harry, or atleast the boy in the prophecy, but this chapter was a little different than the rest of yours, where the fear was actually said at the end, I think that did a world of wonders for the impact of the story, atleast for me. Two, this was so interesting reading from Voldemort's point of view. Now, I've only read two other stories with Voldemort being the main character, but yours was by the best. It was just cunning, and realistic and just wonderful, or as much as it can be, considering its Voldemort we're talking about haha.

I just thought it was so awesome to actually completely see into the villain's mind. I know we do briefly, through Harry, but its still so different seeing it first hand? I just think this was fabulous, again, for it being Voldemort, and I think his fear was such a realistic fear for him to have, death, I mean, thats why he created so many horcruxes in the first place. (Um, is that even the correct plural form? Lol whatever)

Wow, to be completely honest here, I was kinda dreading reading this chapter, simply because it was Voldemort, and it would either be written really well, or really awful. And, if it was the second I was scared as to how this would affect the story, but, I'm so glad I did, because I personally think this chapter sent the story to a whole new level.

You're doing an amazingly awesome job with that one quote, and I can't wait to see the rest of everyone's fears!(: Cheers!

Author's Response: Hello!!!

It's really great to hear that this chapter kind of hit the story into a new level. While writing this chapter I was more into the fear behind the chapter and felt stronger about the idea behind it. The first two were leading up to a bigger idea. It's a turning point in terms of tone and intensity.

The first two stories are a bit more up for interpretation. They were fears that were so general and ephemeral. Voldemort's was quite focused and concrete.

I'm so glad that Voldemort was well done here! (Even the best you've read :D) This was the first time I featured him as a main character. I wrote another story with Tom Riddle (as a little kid) shortly after this. My head was full of Voldy for a few weeks!

Thank you so much for your helpful and incredibly nice review!! I am very happy his fear and the action was well done. :D

-Rose


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Review #43, by MrsKatieGrintNot Normal: {Chapter the Third}

14th November 2013:
YAY ALBUS!

I'm pretty sure me and Ellie would totally be bffs, because I just had a conversation the other day about how anti-social I probably appear to other people. Lol any who, on with your review!

First off, I think you did a wonderful job catching everyone up with all the loopholes you have in your story. Also, your introduction to the new characters, and Ellie's relationship to them was quite flawless if I say so myself. It was super smooth, and wonderful and I just loved this chapter.

I'm so interested into seeing how Ellie's abilities will all play into this. This is such a great story, like you don't even know how sad I am that your muse ran away. Can we please go catch her? Soon? Lol
but like you said, hopefully she'll return after NaNo, so that would be awesomely fantastical amazingly wonderfully great.

The only thing I have to suggest, just because it was super confusing for me, or I couldn't read or something, ha, was fixing up the ages and years. First you say that James and Ellie are only a year apart, and then go on to Ben being in the same year as James, but holding back to repeat fifth year. So are Ellie, Chris, and the rest of the gang in fifth year? I think I just confused myself more by trying to explain this.

That was about it though, haha I absolutely adored this update, if I didn't already say so.(:

I think this was probably your best chapter so far, but thats just my humble opinion.(:

Author's Response: One can never have too much Albus - although he is so difficult to write sometimes.

Hahaha, yeah. For someone who claims not to care about what other people think of her, she is rather aware that she probably appears incredibly anti-social. She isn't as bad as she likes to think she is!

Loopholes make me nervous, so I'm glad a lot of them were plugged. A story can really come apart if there are too many loopholes left around. I really don't like introducing people - how does one do it without dumping info? I'm glad you thought it went well!

There is good news! Chapter 4 is now in the queue! So my muse came back (finally) and even deigned to give me some ideas for chapter 5, which never happens. And the end to exams are in sight, so I hope that means more guilt-free writing time!

The ages are confusing? That is annoying! I shall go back and try to clarify, but for now: they're all in seventh year. Ben used to be in James' year, but he stayed down to repeat OWLs. So that means Ben is a year older than everyone else. Hope that clears things up!

Thanks so much for this fantabulous review! I really appreciate it!


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Review #44, by MrsKatieGrintA Moment of Fear: James

13th November 2013:
Hey there!

Okay, totally called that James' fear would be being a dad! NAILED IT! haha

Anywho, everytime I read a chapter, I fall more and more in love with the idea of this story. I mean its just so amazing!
I don't think you understand how much I actually love this!:D

Its just nice to think that at this time the only thing people feared was Voldemort or the war. I think its nice, that we remember they're people too, not just wizards.

I think you play the part of fear in their lives so nicely? I guess, I mean, its not good that they have fears, its just that the fears you give them are so realistic, and so almost uncomplicated? I mean, not really, because being nervous on your wedding day, or becoming a parent is no small feat, but its just so down to earth. AND I LOVE IT! haha

I think you nailed all of the mauders and their reactions. I literally laughed outloud several times, so I'm sure my roommate thinks I'm more crazy than I actually am.:P

I think your concerns about Peter were right, I guess I just expected him to be more wishy-washy? He was a people pleaser, and the one that didn't really fit in almost? I imagine him to be more jumpy and nervous, real uncertain of anything. I would imagine by now he was in Voldemort's league, but he might not. If that may be the case, I would still expect him to be a little more uncertain of everything, and for that to show in his responses.

All in all, I think you did a marvelous job, and like I said, I adore this story idea in more ways than you could imagine! Great job again, cheers!

Author's Response: Hi!!

I guess his fear was a bit easier to guess (especially following Lily's fear). I'm so glad the story is drawing you in. :D

It is a bit unrealistic to think that people only have the war to fear. I'm sure during WWI/II people had real life stuff to deal with in addition to the war. :D I didn't want to get into deeper/psychological issues with James and Lily. Their fears are quite common and quite surface level (bit but not deep).

It's great to hear I made you laugh. :D I think the Marauders would have been a hoot to hang out with. In my head, Peter hadn't turned to the dark side yet. I do think wishy-washy would be a good way to describe how he should be though.

Thank you so much for another wonderful and helpful review!!

-Rose


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Review #45, by MrsKatieGrintThis Devilry: Chapter Five

13th November 2013:
Hey there again!(:

Okay, wow, definitely was not expecting what this chapter turned out to be. Like, at all. But it was definitely a great chapter!
I'm so so glad Ginny finally decided to tell Harry, but I'm so so sad for what Harry is feeling!D:

I think again that your therapy scene was on point! Probs because you are a therapist, but still, writing about it is a lot different than doing. So kudos there, again!

Now, on to your concerns, I think the panic attack scene wasn't all that clear. I personally have had a panic attack, and I understand that people react differently when having their panic attacks, but just for your writing purposes, here's my suggestion, based on whats happened to me.
First, it comes on super slow, its more like a feeling I can't place as to whats happening. Then, I start thinking about whats currently giving me anxiety, and I worry. Bad, and its pretty much like a tornado in my brain. By that point, I'm hyperventilating, and probably crying, trying to catch my breath. Until I can think straight, i'm shaking and pretty much going crazy. lol when I can finally calm myself down, I definitely drink orange juice, or eat wafers or something to stop the shaking and help my blood sugar.

Now, that you think I'm totally crazy, moving on. Lets just say, college finals definitely get the best of me, haha.
Anyways! That scene was just unclear until you said something about panic. And it happened rather quickly.
Like I said, I just know what happens so thats probably why I can talk forever about it. I presume you know too, since you are a therapist, so you probably have a good sense of them too, but hey, that's just my two cents on the scene!(:

As for Harry and Ginny's last scene, I thought that was a great place to end. Your dialogue between the two was fantastic. I think its also very realistic of Ginny to hold all of her emotion in, and waiting till something breaks her down. I thought that was very character like of Ginny. And as for Harry, that seems like a very Harry thing to do by trying to save the day, even when he doesn't know how, so that was like perfection.

All in all, I'm so interested still as to how this will end up. I really can't wait to see what all is in store for both Ginny and Harry!
Cheers!

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for coming by, and I'm sorry this response has taken so long! :)

Hah, thanks! Writing a therapy session is very different from doing one, that's for sure. I still don't know if I'm happy with the sessions I've written here, but I'm glad to hear you enjoyed this one.

I actually have experienced panic as well and what I wrote may have been slightly more reminiscent of my attacks than yours. But I should have remembered that panic experiences can differ a lot between people, and I need to go back and try to generalize Ginny's experience a little more to make it clearer what exactly has happened to her. People have given me all kinds of interpretations of this scene, so I need to do something to make it more concrete. Thanks for your feedback and for sharing that with me!

(Also, I'm a therapist, so my policy is not to assume you're crazy. Don't worry!)

The dynamic between Harry and Ginny figures prominently in the chapter I'm writing now, and it's proving to be a little difficult to keep a handle on, so I hope you come back when it's posted to give me feedback on it :)

Thanks so much for another lovely review!

-Amanda


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Review #46, by MrsKatieGrintNot Normal: {Chapter the Second}

11th November 2013:
Hey there!
Sorry it took so long to review! I had a super jam packed weekend!D:

Okay, so seriously, this is awesome. I love the fact that you are having Regulus in your story! He is such a minor character, even in the world of FF, and its super depressing, because he seems like a cool guy. Ha, and in your story, just a little behind on times.:P

As I said before, I really love this idea you have going here. I mean, how many wizards can actually talk to ghosts too? I think even though your muse is lost, he or she will come back soon, because forreal, if the start of this story is as amazing as it is, I can't wait for the rest, so I'll personally force your muse to come back! Haha

Okay, I love Ginny, but your Ginny is legit. She is like the bomb dot com times two, because how awesome of a person like her to go and do that for kids that aren't even her own? Watches are huge, and I love the fact that Ginny is like a mother figure for both Ellie and Chris. Love love love!

I'm kinda sad there wasn't more Albus in this chapter.:( Okay, so even though he's kinda cliche here in your story, I still really love him because he's quirky. Lol and really makes me laugh when he flirts with Ellie. So bring more of him bc #lovehim

Okay, I think thats it for now, haha. I rambled a lot here, but you did put good/bad/ugly for your review plea.
So I love this, like a lot, so please find your muse soon!:)

Author's Response: No worries! I've kept people waiting for months to get back to them!

I just love writing Regulus so I want him to be well received. I'm glad to hear that seems to be the case.

I want my muse back so bad! I hope it happens soon... I miss writing this story.

I adore Ginny, so I really wanted to do her justice here. She's a inspired by Molly, whilst still being Ginny, you know? I'm happy that you love her!

I wanted to write more Albus, but he didn't fit in here. I don't know what to do with their relationship at the moment - endgame for them is still very up in the air - but we'll see what happens! He is pretty funny when he flirts!

Thanks so much for this wonderful review! I really appreciate it :)


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Review #47, by MrsKatieGrintThis Devilry: Chapter Four

7th November 2013:
POOR GINNY!

Geez, I certainly hope things get better for her soon, even though you'll have no plot then. Lol maybe not.

I really liked your party scene. It wasn't rushed, and you didn't have too much going on at one time making it hard to understand what all was happening. It flowed very smoothly. Your depiction of the other characters you introduced were nice too! I like how Percy was still well Percy. But you didn't make him over the top. I really like that, because nowadays, everybody makes him out to be some crazy bossy pants, and in the books he was just a bossy pants. Ha, well like I said, it wasn't over the top, and I liked that.
I also like Fleur's character. I still picture her that stuck up girl, and her wanting to do everything = perfect.

That scene with Ginny was seriously bone-chilling. I was seriously freaked. I'm just glad Ron was there to save her!
I do hope she opens up to Harry soon though!

As always, great job on this! I'd love to review again when you have more posted. I'll be waiting to see what happens next!
Cheers!

Author's Response: Hah, you'll have to wait and see!

It's great that you liked the party and enjoyed my portrayal of the other Weasleys. It was fun to imagine how Ginny might feel toward her brothers and how their advice to her as their baby sister might be different. As for Fleur, I thought that maybe Ginny would get along with her but still have some harmless personal differences, as you saw here. I'm glad you liked Fleur's portrayal.

It's great that the ocean scene was scary! She's got some good support around her if she'll just let someone in to help her...

Thanks for your lovely review :)

-Amanda


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Review #48, by MrsKatieGrintThis Devilry: Chapter Three

7th November 2013:
OH GAWD! NOOO!

Holy cow, great cliffhanger! And poor, unsuspecting Harry! Geez!

Okay, good stuff now.
I think that therapy scene you wrote was written really really well. It wasn't cheesy or over analyzed. It was quite perfect actually. I've sat in on some of my sister's therapy sessions, and you've seemed to have nailed it. It seemed pretty realistic to me.

As for the last scene, I think it was awful. Not your writing, what happened! Geez, super creepy. Except, I wouldn't have into the attic, definitely would've made Harry go. Ha

And you have really characterized Harry much until the last paragraph, and I think you did wonderful. Harry is normally a hard person to write, or atleast I think so, because he is what Queen JKR wrote from. So the pressure is definitely on when writing from Harry's view, but, I think you handled him marvelously.

Again, cheers to you, because I literally cannot write anymore because I want to know what happens so bad.:P

Author's Response: Hello again!

I'm actually a therapist in real life, so I would hope the scene came across as realistic :) I did throw in some things to reflect how the experience could be different for a celebrity, like the assumption the therapist made, but I modeled a lot of it after what I've done and seen fellow therapists do in their sessions.

I'm pleased to hear that the last scene was sufficiently creepy and you liked my portrayal of Harry. He's going to kind of be thrown into Ginny's struggles and find that he isn't perfectly equipped to handle them, which may come as a surprise to him. But you'll have to read on further for that :)

Thanks for another sweet review!

-Amanda


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Review #49, by MrsKatieGrintThis Devilry: Chapter Two

7th November 2013:
Hey there!
I totally meant to go back and review, but yesterday I had finally caught up on homework at a decent time, so was able to go to bed pretty early for once! haha so whoops!
But, its okay because I'm reading and reviewing now!:D

Okay, so I love the mention of Fred. A lot of stories just move on like NOBODIES BROTHER DIED AND IT MAKES ME MAD! haha they just completely ignore the fact that one of their family members died, you don't forget that easily or even at all I should say.
So, I love you for that.(;

Also, nice touch on an exhausted early father Ron. I think you portrayed him nicely, especially with a newborn in the house. Although, I feel as if he was a little cold(?) towards Ginny? I don't know. I know they weren't super close, and that he is tired from baby Rose, but I would've thought with Ginny married to Harry things between them would be a little better? I don't know, just a suggestion!
Also, again, I never would've thought to include the toll of the war on Hermione, but again, you portrayed her perfectly, almost making me think this is actually how Hermione would've been. I think this was a great aspect to include, whether it was just for Ginny's benefit so that she would have a reference for her own dreams, or not, but that was lovely, and definitely believable.
With the mood, I definitely got the seriousness vibe going on. I think that was right because of all that Hermione unloaded onto Ginny, as well as Ginny actually saying what was going on with her out loud. I understand that this is a darker story, therefore it will give off more serious/angsty vibes, and I think you're doing fabulous with that.
All in all, I think you did a great job of keeping the readers interested with the second chapter, unlike most stories who use the second chapter as filler. Again, I am dying for more, and I know there is going to be more to this problem than is let on now, and I can't wait to see it resolved.
Cheers again, to another beautiful chapter!
Katie

Author's Response: No worries, Katie, thanks!

Yeah, I don't think it would be easy for the Weasley family or anyone close to them to fill the void of Fred's death or forget him. It would be hard for me to imagine a post-war story that didn't at least mention Fred. I'm glad you liked my inclusion of him.

I guess I didn't convey the emotion properly in the scene with Ron. I definitely didn't mean for him to come across as cold toward Ginny; I'm sure they'd get along fine. What I meant to show is just what they've both been worn down by the war and there's a sense of emptiness there between them because of what they've lost--something that wouldn't exist between Ginny and someone who didn't know her pain, an outsider. Does that make sense? Maybe I need to clarify that more.

I'm happy to hear that you liked the mood and the interaction between Ginny and Hermione. I definitely wouldn't want my second chapter to feel like filler, and I'm glad it didn't seem that way to you. There's a lot left to happen before Ginny's struggles are resolved, but hopefully you enjoy watching the story unfold further :)

Thanks for your kind review!

-Amanda


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Review #50, by MrsKatieGrintA Minor Setback: Chapter of the First

7th November 2013:
Hey there! KatieRoo from the forums here!

Okay, so first of all, it seems like Seraphina and I would make the best of friends! Haha
She's quite likable, and very realistic, if I say so myself. I think you did a great job of characterizing her, and like I said, she seems like a mini me. Ha!

I personally didn't catch too many tense slips, and the ones that I did were mentioned in pervious reviews. So as far as that goes, I think you're swell.

Also, I do know that pregnancy at Hogwarts is a bit of a cliche, but as far as I can see, you don't seem to have the regular ones that most people do, and I love the fact that you're using an OC as the main character of this story, which should help with cliches to avoid.

All in all, I think your story has a great start, and I think you're doing wonderful!

Author's Response: Hey there KatieRoo!

I'm glad that you like Seraphina! She's not an easy character to like because of the type of person that she is but I'm glad that you like her and think that you would get along.

I hope that I can take a non cliche story line and make it different than it usually is.

Thank you for your feedback!


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