Ohhho! Do I get my nargle? *puppy eyes*
I really like this one-shot. It had a poetic feel to it (I'm a poetry freak) and it flowed very nicely. I love your description in this one shot, Draco is OC but you made him so lovable that I don't notice it. I love the two of them together in your story. (IE it was only 616 words and you left me wanting more!)
The only critic I have is the spacing (it took me FOREVER to figure it out too) – to do a single 1.5ish space you have to hit preview then go through and delete all the extra spaces but one. It is a lot of work but I think it is very worth it. Keep them focused on your beautiful writing instead of those annoying spaces =)
Love your story and can't wait to see what you come up with next! Tens all around!Author's Response: Yes the spaces were quite difficult and I wasn't sure what to do. But I am glad you liked this story! As soon as I get some precious free time I will try to post another story! You just made my day! XD Report Review
You use great verbs! XD It paints a picture so well!! Hey, if you want, I can make a banner for you I'd be more then happy! I love making Draco-Luna banners! XD Great story! Hope you post more soon!Author's Response: Hey, thanks! I've had major writer's block, and I haven't looked at this story in a while. So hopefully I'll be able to update soon. Thanks for reading! Keep working on your stories! Report Review
Its a nice start, and it doesn't suck so don't say that! = ) It's your first one, and everyone has room for improvment. New writer or Old writer. We all still have A LOT to learn.
For some reason I was reading it in like a 40's Gumshoe voice in my head thou. It might just be me cus I'm weird that way XD or maybe cus of the small sentences. I wanted more details while I was reading, what Ally looked like and what she was seeing. Don't be afraid to write a lot if you feel its nessacary to paint the picture for your readers! = )
I love the idea for the plot! I can't wait to see where you take it = ) You show a lot of promise, especially with all those witty lines in there!! Thnx for making me smile and most importantly KEEP WRITING. = )Author's Response: Thank you so much! I do hope that the description gets better. I wrote most of the story already and i wrote the first chapter a month ago and i do hope that i have improved since then.
i will rewrite this sometime, i need to add more to the plot in the beggining.
Dude it's been so long since you updated! XD I have to go back and read all the rest of the chapters to remember the plot! Thnx for the update though and can't wait for more, hopefully, soon!Author's Response: _Keeper_! It has been way too long you are so right! I really hope you enjoyed Ch 24 and that things start to make sense again.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read/re-read. It means so much.
And yes, I plan on updating more regularly. This story is so important to me as are all of you guys who take the time to read and review.
Hope all well! Happy reading!
-Ffleur Report Review
I can make you a banner if you want. Just tell me what you want on it and leave it in a review--and interesting story, I'm going to have to read the rest as well! = ) Report Review
Good start, I like how you write. Can't wait for the update = ) Report Review
Ending sort of confused me, was she kissing Fred or George? cus I thought it was a Hermione-George flic, its good though I really liked it!! = )Author's Response: She's kissing George. I'm so sorry, it is supposed to be a Hermione- George flic. I have no idea how that happened! But thank you! And I'm fixing my mistake now! Report Review
Loved it!! Can't wait for more!! So close! Cedric kiss her already!! ; ) great job!!Author's Response: Thanks very much, I'm really glad you enjoyed the latests update! More to come soon. Report Review
Sad, they didn't end up together *tear* but beautifully written!! it was a real joy to read, you should do another!! = )Author's Response: Yeah, I didn't think they would ever get together - it's Hermione and Neville, that one couple I could never see happening, so I had to do my best to get them together in likely circumstances :)
I'm actually over the moon you liked it so much, and I'm definitely now considering doing a companion piece for this, set in the the Crying Corridor :') Keep a look out, and thank you SO much for reading and reviewing! ^^ Report Review
Beautiful, keep going - I love the way you write. It's so poetic and lovely, its like water - it flows perfectly together! = ) Report Review
Great chapter, can't wait for the next one! (Don't make us wait to long again please, its to good to have to wait and see!!!) Cedric better not die thou...*glare*Author's Response: Oh no, you're glaring!! I hate it when people do that!! lol.
I know I've takne forever in updating & I'm sorry for that! I didn't mean to be so bad in posting chapters.
Thanks for sticking with me! & how about an update on Glitter??? lol Report Review
Oh you can't leave us there! keep going. its such an amazing start - it could make a beautiful, beautiful story. great job girly, keep writting because this was AMAZING! =)Author's Response: Thanks again(: I'm keeping this a oneshot, but my full-length story (nine chapters) is on the way after another oneshot. So stay tuned!! And I'm SO glad you liked it(: Report Review
I knew Draco was drunk, I was reading it and I'm like what the...oh he's drunk - Ginny's punch line tiped me. Its a nice little one-shot though, you should do a full novel or something you are a really good writter and I'd love to see how you could develop a plot line and characters over time instead of a one-shot (even though you are growing better each time with them) keep writting ; )Author's Response: Thank you so much(: I actually just finished a nine-chapter D/L story and I'm going to post it as soon as a couple more one-shots get validated. So please keep reading, and PLEASE keep working on A Light in the Dark!! Report Review
It was a really nice read. I think you nailed Regulus perfectly! He is one of my favorite characters just because of the mystery surrounding him. Great job writting all your characters. Mrs. Black seemed in cannon as well adn I loved how Sirius acted. it seemed very in character. = )Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review! Regulus is one of my favorites as well. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Report Review
Another chapter, and mights I say it just keeps getting better and better -- keep up the good work and update soon plz!! = )Author's Response: Thanks very much! I'm really glad that you are enjoying it still! I'm patiently waiting for an update on your Draco/Luna or at least another Harry/Luna one shot, they're always so cute!! lol.
Thanks again for taking the time to read & review Report Review
I loved it! plz plz plz update more!! love draco-luna! they are amazing!! = )Author's Response: Yeah I love em too!! lol. I'll update again soon, I know it's taken me forever with this story!! I've been pretty bad lol.
Thanks for sticking with me!! Report Review
I loved how your writting had a tone of poetry too it. it was really well written, perfectly in canon. you have a nice, sweet style of writting to read. keep writtingAuthor's Response: Ahhh thank you thank you thank you!! What a lovely review to get first thing in the morning =]
And thank you for reading!! Report Review
It was a very beautiful scene between the two, usually I'm not one for short to-the-point stories, but yours was very sweet and Luna was definitly in character, I could see Draco developing into the way you wrote him in time but not right off the bat, but he still had that sort of Draco feel to him. you have a very nice style of writting, its a joy to read, keep it up = )Author's Response: I am SO glad you liked my story :D firstly because you were one of the main people that got me hooked on DM/LL (if you look at other reviews for this I recommend "A Light in the Dark") and I really look up to you. It is an honor for me to have you enjoy this. I try :) Report Review
awww, loved it! can't wait for more Ced-Luna! great, amazing, and wonderful writting as usual! = )Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing as always, I'm really glad that you are still enjoying the story.
I hope you update your Draco/Luna soon!! Report Review
Aww.that was so cute! I loved it! the perfect Cedric and Luna moment, can't wait for the next update! PLEASE don't make me wait long!! = ) its to good of a plot and to well written of a story to wait in suspence for the next chapter!!!Author's Response: I'm so pleased that you enjoyed this chapter!! I've written the next chapter so I'm just waiting for another story to be validated and then I'll update this story again. I'm really glad that you're enjoying it so far.
When do u plan on updating your Draco/Luna story?? Report Review
Great as usual! Can't wait to see what you have next! = )Author's Response: Thanks very much, the next chapter is written and coming soon! Report Review
Rhys? Interesting name, I'm curious where you found it or if ur wonferfully creative mind made it up urself! = ) I love how Luna is now in Cedrics thoughts! can't wait to see what happens! Both were perfectly in character, and as usual love ur OC's, keep up the good work!Author's Response: Rhys is a popular name around my area, it's from Welsh origins I think, but I could be wrong lol.
I'm really enjoying writing the growing freindship between Luna & Cedric so I'm glad you're enjoying it too!! As I've said before I'm not big on OC's at all, so I'm really pleased you think they are still coming along nicely!
Thanks for reviewing as always!! Report Review
Wicked awesome chapter! can't wait too see what you have planed next! Luna was just brilliantly written, Ced too, and I'm really taking a liking to Darius as a character. keep up the good work. = )Author's Response: I'm actually really liking Darius myself, which is odd because I don't usually like OC's in the Potter verse which is why I don't write them. There will be more story time for Darius, as he is Cedric's best friend.
Thanks again for reviewing!! Report Review
I'm so happy I'm finally seventeen and can read this now! It is beautifully written, and its romantic and pure love and smooth to read, no smut to be found (smut is kinda creepy to be honest) I knew you could write something like this and make it purely beautiful not gross. (thats why I took a chance in reading it) Your writing is amazing, thanks for writing this! = )Author's Response: Thank you very much for the lovely comment! & congrats on your birthday by the way.
I really appreicate you taking the time to read this, & I'm very pleased that you enjoyed it as I loved writing this one shot.
Thanks again for reviewing. Report Review
Bring out the ferret juice! Haha, just joking, I love the way you write Luna - she gave the perfect reaction to Draco's self-sacrifce try. And Draco is just perfectly Draco - only w/ a heart instead of like in the books. ; ) keep updatingAuthor's Response: I'm really glad that you like the way I portray Luna, having her react to something like this is difficult to write as I'm not sure how she would respond lol.
Draco doesn't like to show that he has a heart & he's trying to do the right thing, lol. However, I beleive that he would be way too selfish to do the right thing twice lol.
I guess we'll see what Luna does soon lol. Report Review
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