8/10. A rather well-crafted narrative, with no real major mistakes. However, I will have to mark you down for your lack of detail. For example, the sudden introduction of Harry's son, James. Having a child at fifteen isn't exactly something that can be hidden. Also, as several other people have said, some detail in Ron and Hermione's breakup would be nice.Author's Response: The sudden intro to James will be explained in a later chapter. Sorry if its confusing, i probably should have explained that. But, ill explain y James is hidden later Report Review
Hahahahahahaha. I was listening to "Lapdance" by N.E.R.D. while I was reading this. More accurately, the song came on the moment Hermione sits on Harry's lap. Now that I've finally finished laughing, the review!
It's refreshing from the blatent Ginny-bashing that quite a few fics seem to have. It is present, but much more subtle. And a bit more humorous.
Hehehehehehe. I almost signed this review with my real name, like how I do over E-mail, rather than with your score. I fail. Again.Author's Response: Nice timing, I suppose. I actually had no idea I was doing subtle Ginny-bashing. I was just writing what came. I do that sometimes, and the stories turn out really good.
I wouldn't mind knowing your real name. Report Review
Heh. While reading that chapter, I had a rather random mental image of Robert sitting through one of Umbridge's DADA classes. Hehehehehehehe...
"Alright, Mr. Morgan. You are approached by a Dark Wizard. What do you do?"
*mannequin approaches Robert*
"Hello there. Pleasure to make your acquai...ah, screw this!"
*draws out pistol and shoots mannequin*
And, as randomness builds upon itself, that image was followed by Umbridge enduring a day of Black Guard training.
"Alright, when I blow the whistle, use everything you learned to reach the finish line. The rounds the practice dummies are using are non-lethal."
*whistle blows, as trainees rush forwards and begin shooting and bayoneting; Umbridge walks up to a mannequin and attempts negotiation*
"Good morning, kind sir. How are you this fine da..."
"Oops, did I say they were nonlethal? I meant to say that it was live ammunition."
Sorry. Anyways, good chapter. It's nice to see Hidden Agendas being updated after quite a hiatus. Looking forward to seeing more. Loved the prank, by the way.
Hope Umbridge gets pranked big-time. I'm pretty sure that there's not a HP fan that doesn't love to hate Umbridge. Makes writing her midnight appointment with a sniper ri...oops...
10/10.Author's Response: Oooh, I can't wait! Please, please write more!
And yes, Umbridge will be getting the pranks of her miserable life. Report Review
w00t!!! Christmas has come early! I read this on Portkey, and I loved it. Now all we need is Circle's End and Forever Knight on this website...
10/10. I'd go higher, since I already know what happens, but the site won't allow me to.Author's Response: Thank you for your kind words of support. I'm glad you enjoyed the story. Report Review
Agh. Sorry about not reviewing. I've just had a lot on my plate recently. Considering my AP History class has to kill off Napolean by New Years and we were on the Enlightenment, we had a lot of cramming to do.
Anyways, enough of my misery, and more about Harry's misery. A good Harmony story, as always. A few of these lines are definitely being filed away, starting with the cooties line. Though a SWAT-style assault would have probably solved problems faster, that simply wouldn't have fit in the story...
Y'know, for some reason, I had a mental image of Neville pulling out a Blade of Awe and PWD'ing Ron. While that's probably not happening anytime soon, one can always have their fantasies...
10/10Author's Response: I know what it feels like to cram for exams. My last final officially ended yesterday what I passed the whole kit and caboodle to my rather satanic teacher. Can I borrow the Black Guard to raid his house?
Anyway, thanks for reviewing. I'll always remember you were the first to do that for this story. Report Review
Hahahahahaha. This just gave me inspiration as to the next chapter of Black Guard: The Lost Chapters.Author's Response: I always like to inspire people. Thanks for reading, and I'm glad you liked it. Report Review
10/10.Author's Response: Hahahaha, I did it again! Report Review
Nice, especially love the telling off of Umbridge. Though I think my version with the sniper r...I said too much.
10/10.Author's Response: Yeah, you said too much. Now I can't wait. But thanks for reading and reviewing mine. Report Review
Pretty good. I've never really done Evil!Molly before, but you make it rather hilarious at times. Pretty good, and I like the parallel to the story of Jezebel.
10/10.Author's Response: Thank you! It's really not hard to do Evil!Molly. You just need to sit in front of a computer screen and it all comes pouring out. Report Review
I amend my previous statement as to Ron dying. I hope he dies horribly.
10/10.Author's Response: haha, a lot of people do nowadays. i must be good at pining him as the bad guy, then? if all of you wanna kill him, it MUST mean i'm doing a good job! yayy me!! Report Review
That's it. Choose a Black Guard unit. Any unit. They'll storm England within an hour. Considering that thirty of them swept aside several hundred Aurors with no casualties, it should be a pretty entertaining slaughter. Let's see how the theories of pure blood supremacy hold up them. Hehehehehe.
Anyhow, enough of my nonsensical ramblings. A very good chapter, and deepens the plot quite a bit.
10/10. Report Review
WOHO!!! A sequel! Just one question, is the other Harry dead? You really left his far ambiguous...
10/10.Author's Response: He's still around for now. You'll find out what happens to him in a later chapter. Report Review
Hahahaha, As I was saying, I have it on excellent authority that the wards you placed on Harry Potter's place of residence allegedly to protect him from harm, suck. Priceless.
10/10.Author's Response: I had so much fun writing that it should be illegal. Psst! Don't tell the cops! Report Review
Kinda reminds me of that scene from Independence Day.
"Oops? Whaddya mean 'oops'? Don't say 'oops'!"
"No, no, its okay. Some jerk just put the controls on upside-down."
10/10.Author's Response: I've seen that movie a couple of times (at least three) and I don't remember a scene like that. Oh well. Thanks for the review. Report Review
A Death Note? I have one too!
*writes down Fudge's name and begins counting down*
Anyways, 10/10.Author's Response: How long has it been now? Is he dead yet? XDDD Report Review
This here is what we call a standard Kobayashi Maru scenario. I'd like to see how you get Harry and Hermione back together after this one. You'd have to pull a Kirk to do it.
10/10 Report Review
When will Dumbledore ever learn? Time for some covert operations that I'll later deny ever took place.
*to someone offscreen*The operation is a go!
10/10.Author's Response: He'll learn by the beginning of Harry's fifth year. I can guarantee that. Report Review
Hehehehehe. Hilarious... *reads on* OH GOD! MY EYES!!!
10/10Author's Response: You mean Dumby and Minnie? Yeah, I had to think of something that would make someone ill without giving them the flu. Sory about that.
But look on the bright side... At least he swings the right way :) Report Review
That's it? NO! There must be more!
*begins flipping pages frantically*
NO!!Author's Response: lol :) sorry that it's over Report Review
Hehehehe. The fleas subplot is rather entertaining. I rarely condone Weasley-bashing, but you do it so well...
10/10.Author's Response: It's my favorite hobby. Thanks for reading and reviewing. Report Review
Heh. That comment reminded me of that scene from Don't Mess With Zohan. "Welcome to Al-Qaeda business office. For employment opprotunities, please press one." Or something like that.
And the answer's Adam and Eve. Not. XD
Anyhow, good chapter. Full marks, as always.Author's Response: Haha! That's funny! And thanks for reading and reviewing. I'm glad you like my work, and that you're putting up with my insanity.
Just wondering, what is it you like about my stories (besides the H/Hr)? I have several more stories, just waiting for the right time to post, that bash Dumbledore.
Of course, the right time to post them will most likely be after I finish Hidden Agendas. Report Review
AT LAST! And I hope we've all learned a lesson. Nine out of ten problems in life can be solved with a Black Guard strike team. Ginny'd be 90% lead by the time the first blow with that hammer lands.
This is an AMAZING story, and I've enjoyed every chapter. You've gotten the insane persona down quite well.
10/10.Author's Response: Thanks so much :) Report Review
Y'know what's funny? Every time I read this story, I keep on imaging Ron and Harry singing Rockstar, by Nickelback. Heh.
Ron: I'm tired of waiting in line at clubs I'll never get in. It's the the bottom of the ninth and you know you're never going to win. This life hasn't quite turned out the way I want it to be.
Harry: So what do you want?
Ron: I want a brand new house on an episode of Cribs, and a bathroom I can play baseball in, and a king-size tub big enough for ten, plus me.
Harry: So, whatcha gonna need?
Ron: I want a credit card that's go no limit. I want a big, black jet with a bandroom in it. I want to join the mile-high club at thirty seven thousand feet.
Harry: So, how ya gonna do it?
Ron: I'm tradin' this life for fortune and fame. I'll even cut my hair and change my name. 'Cause we all just wannt be big rock stars, living in hilltop houses drivin' fifteen cars...
Sorry, rambling again. Anyhow, very interesting story, and I definately look forward to seeing Ginny's plot inevitably fail. Now to get back to my twisted image of Ron and Harry singing Rockstar.Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing, and I will write that next chapter we promised. Report Review
Gr. Dumbledore is such a jerk. I've run out of Halo references, so it's time to move on to MechQuest references. I'm lining up the Shadow Mega Gunners right now. Now to hope they don't display their famous accuracy, or lack thereof. How one can miss a five-story target with a sniper rifle is beyond me...
Anyhow, those two do seem to be a bit young to be snogging like that. Still, 10/10.Author's Response: Yeah, it is kind of young, but they were feeling particularly mortal at that moment. That started it, then their hormones finished it. Report Review
*sigh* Ginny needs to learn that the road to Hell is paved with good intentions.
8/10. I docked a few points for spelling. Report Review
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