I read this story just because I saw the One reveiw and felt sorry for you(I admit it) and I truthfully didn't like it that much. Sorry. Just too boring (I am trying to be helpful here) to keep up with. Sorry try again. Maybe Next TIme.
14lilyflowergirl 2/10

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Okay this is my story, but I'm just wondering how a story with 200+ reads, Not kidding, could only have 3 reveiws? I mean no offense to those who did reveiw, in fact, thanks! A million too!

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Whoo! You're back! I can't wait for more installments! I agree with the Anthony situation solution. I think you handled it very maturly. I agree that Viola being single and then with Sirius makes more sense than having an awkward-is-she-now-a-popular-Stella-Anders-Clone breakup with such a sweet boy like Anthony. Good story, choice, and chapter. Keep up the good work
14lilyflowergirl 9/10

Author's Response: You're pretty spot on about how I was feeling about the whole Anthony and Violet situation. It would've gotten really ugly and nothing would seem believable.

I'll update soon. Hopefully. Thanks for giving me some feedback!

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Okay I really must be blunt about this, Huh? This and the other one are quite confusing

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what about what happens afterwords?

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Oh come on. I don't mean to sound really rude, but why would Lily faint? I just don't get it. Please answer this with an acceptable answer soon.
14lilyflowergirl 8/10

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What does Sirius mean, "This", when he says, "I hpe you didn't inherit THIS from you parents-"?

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Sweet little song fiction.
14lilyflowergirl 9/10

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it. =) This is my favorite songfic I wrote.
xxCecilia

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It seems that you are writting this from Scott Westerfield's, Uglies,Pretties,Specials, and Extras series. I really think you should lay down the rules right now if that is what you are doing. Remember Plagurism is punishable by law. Just making sure. This was a very good story. Have fun writing more!
14lilyflowergirl 9/10

Author's Response: Thanks >.<
I did get the idea from him, and you are completely right. Will clear that up now.

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Come on. James got the cloak because he's related to the first brother. Lily's uncle can't be a half-blood or she wouldn't be a muggle-born. Please fix these because I am thinking very poorly of your story right now.
14lilyflowergirl 5/10

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Tsk, tsk, tsk. I really must insist that you go back over all these spelling errors! And your humor does not stink! It's pretty good compared to.others.

Author's Response: thank you!

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You overexaggerat I lot of this and it is extremly blunt. More detail and please less just James saying, go out with me and Lily shouting at him. It does get very boring.
I'm sorry if you take this the wrong way and report this reveiw, but I honestly think you should follow these tips to help your story!
14lilyflowergirl 4/10

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Once again, using I'll instead of I will will definatly improve your story for the better!
14lilyflowergirl 7/10

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I think you should use there's instead of there is. It sounds more carefree and less put together. There's plenty of other words you should change like that too.
14lilyflowergirl 8/10

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Well. I must say that you caught my attention with the title, but I also must add that this ending was not how I pictured it. In fact, I rather thought that you would go on for a while. I really was quite hoping you would. I think it would make for a good short story or even novella. I guess if you liked the ending the way it was, I should be satisfied with that!
Good story. Hope to read more of your works later.
14lilyflowergirl 10/10

Author's Response: thanks for reviewing! actually thinking about that, i may take the idea and turn it into a short story with this as a chapter in it. We have another one (which is a novella) in validation at the moment :)

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I bet Sirius is an imposter. I mean it just seems that you're giving out clues for it.

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Okay, I would personally like to state that this is the best fanfiction I have ever read. It contains plenty of fiction, that's for sure, but you don't overwelm the story with it. I did notice that you used 'example' where they most definatly did not belong. You had several words that were in the wrong tense. The ending was rather confusing, but I think it ended on a good note. I'm very curious, what is the sequel called? I would like to read it as soon as possible.
This was a very good story and you should be proud of yourself.
14lilyflowergirl 9/10

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Aw. This was a very mushy and fluffy story. I saw no spelling/ grammer errors. I loved the way you protrayed Lily in this. What was the prank supposed to be by the way? I'm very curious.
14lilyflowergirl 10/10

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This is an extremly blunt way to start a story and does not like very good. Yes parts of it are okay, but it is way too blunt and short. Please try again.
14lilyflowergirl

Author's Response: yes, i do know the writing is not very good as that part was written more than a year and a half ago. The story is undergoing a major, full story final edit where parts will be rewritten and I can assure you the first chapter will defenietly be rewritten.

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This story was one that made sense in many perspectives of the Harry Potter series. The way Remus quotes in the movie that, "your mother was there for me in a time when no one else was." in reference to Harry's mother, Lily Evans/Potter. One mistake I saw in this chapter is you had loyalty when I know you meant royalty. This really was a nice story and you should be proud. Few spelling errors hurt my eyes along the way.
14lilyflowergirl 9/10

Author's Response: Thanks for your review :) I'm glad you liked the story. I know I should go back and fix the spelling errors and such, but I'm still working on a few other stories so I don't feel up to editing yet. But thanks for letting me know :)

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This was a nice story, I guess. I was hoping for a little more detail, perhaps add some length to those chapters. Maybe the ball and Preparations could be explained better? Many of the sentences you used were very blunt. I also think you should have at least half a chapter of Peter being in the Slyerian Commen Room or near it perhaps. I hope I do not sound to critical to you. I love rich detail and will strive for it like a pesky old English teacher.
14lilyflowergirl 8/10

Author's Response: It's fair enough, I was pretty young when I wrote this and in a hurry to write the story before it fell out of my head or whatever happens if you don't get it down quick enough. My point being, I appreciate the criticism xD thank you for reading.

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I am only going to make this short because I would like to keep reading, Lily has red hair, not strawberry blond hair.
14lilyflowergirl

Author's Response: She likes to think of it as strawberry blonde, in my story.

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Oh my. This was a very good story to read. I did notice a few things out of order though. How could Lily and James have a cat (as it says in the seventh book in Lily's letter to Sirius) if they were both allergic? Plus in this chapter with Harry, in his seventh year, he was already at the Weasley's at least a week before his birthday, in this story you have him at Privet Drive. I know I sound very critical right now and you might even report this reveiw, but my reveiws always come rich in detail and I feel no need to hold back any sort of mistakes I see on your part. I very much enjoyed reading this Fanfiction, no matter what you think, and hope you will write many more like it. Please fix the above errors and this nine will become a ten.
14liilyflowergirl 9/10

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corneir than the first i see no humor, just fluff

Author's Response: true, very true

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you should add another chapter about lily overhearing James and her reaction. It would be good! I like this story. I didn't see many spelling/grammer errors, so pat yourself on the back. Very rich in detail and fun to read.
14lilyflowergirl

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