Okay so I really like the story plot, just it's kinda hard to read the dialogue, you should separate it into their own paragraphs.
I think that you are incorporating it well into the books making it fit together, and make sense.
keep it up!Author's Response: That you for reading and mostly for reviewing! ;) Much appreciated
I will take on board what you say, sorry about my page layout, I know it sucks - just glad you like the content!
Many thanks for your time! XxNikixX Report Review
I loved it so much I literally was lol. I am so sad that you are ending it, it depresses me lol. I would love to read a sequal, I love arry's charecter and ur wrieting that you for entertaining me for several days lol.
xoxAuthor's Response: heh heh - you're very welcome. I'm glad you liked it! I'm still not sure about a sequel but maybe eventually :P.
Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
OMG OMG OMG
That was pricelessAuthor's Response: :) Report Review
Holy. Thats pretty all I can say. The description was so amazing, I dont think i have ever read something full of that much emotion, I felt so connected to Reglas. I loved it so much. I have nothing bad to say, I mean you are so descriptive about everything, everything in your story has a detail of sometype that makes it that much more unique. The style you write is so sweet! It is so diffrent and I like it alot.
wow,Author's Response: Aw, thank you! **Huggles** That's really sweet of you to say so. My description- amazing? Wow. I am really really chuffed and surprised. I was honestly so worried about this fic before it came on here. I was thinking, 'Have I wrote the characters correctly?' and everything. So glad you thought I did. I might have to change my writing style for the future then. This isn't my usual style, but I am happy you liked it.
Wow for the review,
Chapters 2 and 3;
Where shal I start? I think I will start with the fact that I dont think you put enough emotion into Alice's letter, I think that if her son was dead too, she would also be in the emotional state that Lily was, and unable to joke about toys and such, Also try to lengthen chapters out, the longer and more detailed the more people will look forward to updates knowing that they will get a long chapter.
I love the little details you add in to make it so- GREAT! lol. The effectiveness of your writing amazes me. It is so cool how you manage to mek me really feel for the epople.However the ending- too confusing- you need to be more direct- cliffy's are always good- but this is just bloody confusing.
KEEP IT UP!Author's Response: I'll try to look at everything you pointed out. Awe, cheers for the nice comment. The ending is suppose to be confusing.lol.
thanks. Report Review
Okay, I dont have much to say about the first chapter, so- i will do small reviews like every other chapter- then one BIG one in chapter 6 sounds good? Herer we go...
That has to be the saddest fanfic I have ever read, how you manages to make me feel that much sorrow, and that upset amazes me. It was so intense. lol.
The idea is just so different from the stories I usually read, like killing harry!? omg! lol, I was like woah woah woah- back it up, I swear i read it like three times. And its only the first chapter lol. Usually the first chapters a skim through and then Im like okay yea on with it! but in yours I was like omg omg omg, I had to keep going back and re reading thinking that I read it wrong.
That's a great start and a very amazing twist- on to chapter two!!!Author's Response: oh, it's really up to you which way you review the story. I don't mind.
awe, I tried my best with the emotions, so really thanks A LOT for saying it was the saddest. It totally made my day.
I don't like writing chapter where nothing happens in it, so first chapter, for me, usually have something major to get the story going.
thanks!! hope you like the other chapters as much as this one! Report Review
I really liked reading this, it was diffrent then all the other 'child of the dark lord' stories, this one had some sence behind it,
Keep it up,
I loved it.
Author's Response: thanks! going through a stage were im not writing much! But im going to try to soon! Report Review
dear god lady, I love thsi stpry- but why did she say no!? I would have been like skip dinner okay lets go! lol, but she said no!
you are going to drive me crazy arent you? hm?
way to go1
LOVED IT!Author's Response: lol, muahahaha. It is my evil genius plan to drive all my readers crazy. Nah, I just don't think she should give in that easily.
Glad you like the story and the chappie.
Cheers for reviewing! Report Review
no lie i think i might cry-
i loved this story right till the end.. I think that you shod do a sequal... hint hint.
I am So sad its over-
9(con't) out of 10Author's Response: thanks so much. haha maybe some day. I know I have never been so sad. Report Review
I have to admit- I was a little timid about reading it at first but god am i glad i did.
I feel SO bad for him! they beat him up I was like nooo.
lol ani loved the end hahahaAuthor's Response: Well I'm glad you enjoyed it! And yes the fight scene seems to be the favorite of many xD Report Review
omg, that was so cute! I swear I will temperarlly hate you when it is over. I love it so much- uhg. *sigh*
i am so happy that things worked out tho! that was a HUGE sigh of releif lol.
Author's Response: thanks so much! Ahh I know I am gonna be so sad. Report Review
you poseted on te forums about what is wrong with your story. Personally I didnt enjoy the plot, I dont see where it is ging and It doesnt have an overall objective(to me anyways) I think that you are a talented author if you have the right plot. make sure you have strong charecter traits(like habits and words you use for them such as grin rather then smile) also make sure the point is clear and there is usally a problem(check you have it lol!) so i think that it is all opinion weather pple like stories not the story it's self. Like have you ever read a story that got all thease reviews like wow great and so on and you think well it was okay... it is all opinion.
hope that helped.
xoxAuthor's Response: Thank You it does Report Review
wow. I love simple and sweet, It was so cute.
it was overall VERY original, i mean I have never read a story like this.. insane. lol. It was also a bit short, it seemed really short. lol. I felt as though the detail and visualization were lacking. I felt like i was reading a story written by like a younger kid lol.
The ending was SO amazining, so cute and very good.
xoxAuthor's Response: Thank you so much. I'm glad that you thought it was original, because that was my main goal here. Writing something that was... unique and original. This is really short, I think I pointed that out in my author's note or something. Well, this is Seamus's point of view and he is eleven at the time, so you can't really expect it to be chock full of detail. I plan on adding more description in the first half of the story though. But I'm glad you loved the ending! =] Report Review
oh dear what to say here. I have so many comments that I have writen down while reading this, and yet I dont have time to type them ll- so lets sum it all up... I loved it so much. I think that you should try to lengthen chapters that are shorter, I realized you have a thing for clif hangers tho- lol, but you want to keep your chapters consistant if possible.
I love your cheracterization, I relate to teh cheareters and the situations insanely well. I loved that you showed th nice side of a German, showing that not all should be labeled as Nazi's. I loved that.
haha and this is one thing i cannot leave out- Aleksander- oh boy, this kid is interesing, there is something about him that I cant quite figure out, but for some reason i sdore his charecter, he is so- I dont even know, he reminds me of someone i know and I love his... personality lol,
way to go.
keep up the good work.
xoxAuthor's Response: My writer's trademark is cliffhangers and tension/suspense, and it may cut back my chapters some, but the area between 1200 - 2300 is a comfortable chapter length for me (since I'm the one that has to sit and write it all down. XD) It enables me to work towards a goal, and if it goes over, it just makes me more happy, and then I work towards a cliff-hanger moment to cut off at.
Danke! I'm glad you can connect with them, seeing as the situations they're in are more realistic situations, than magical. And it's easier to relate, since History often repeats itself (In JK's world, the Holocaust was repeated in Book Seven, with Muggle-Borns).
Hahaha, there's so much about Aleksander you don't know, and you don't see. You probably won't know or see that much about him right now - don't expect him to crop up too much. He will appear now and again, can't tell you when. XD
-Ginni Report Review
wow, this took awhile to read lol. So i decided to just review the whole thing in one- so here it goes-
I love the whole plot of the story, it is so amazing- and Tip, what an absolute unique name. (As much as i think he is no good, I still have this odd affection for him) lol, You are good at portraying the emotions of the characters and they are all insanely well written, I loved reading this. It was intense.
One thing I would say is the dialogue, I am a fan of like, alot of it lol, I like to relate to the characters by what they say, but I still relate to them insanely well in your fic. And I love Sirius, I could say so much about him- uh i love him. I love this story and i hope you keep it up;
xoxAuthor's Response: Hey there! Yeah, I was pretty sure it might take a minute or two. ;) That's fine. So long as you left at least one review, I'm cool. ^_^
I'm really, really, really happy that you like this so far. I actually know someone called Tip, lol! He used to go to school with me. I know exactly what you mean. I don't like him at all simply because he's getting in the way of any Sirius/Gemma relationship that might be a'brewin'. There isn't another reason to hate him...yet. ;)
I'm glad that you find this to be something you can relate to. That was one of my big goals in writing it. I'll definitely look into adding a bit more dialogue. I find that if I try to put TOO much in, it reads forced.
Sirius = Love. Plain and Simple. lol!
Thank you for the review, and I'll try to update ASAP. :) Love, Hannah xoxo Report Review
i dont think you have too- not many people did so, it's all good. I liked it and no one complains so leave it lol. and again i liked it!!!Author's Response: Haha. Thank you!!! Report Review
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