Hmm.I reckon that was a pretty good stab at a first-time song-fic. What you need to look for when (if) you write another one is making sure you get a song with better lyrics. Don't get me wrong, this is a wonderful song, but the lyric range isn't very vast. Maybe try a song whose lyrics tell a story next time, just until you get better at it. I may seem hipocritical (I haven't tried a song-fic yet) but I think you can help others better than helping yourself. Right?

Beautiful job!

Love always,
Mrs Becky Lupin
xoxoxoxoxox

Author's Response: Thank you for such a great review!
Marlena Valentine is a song very close to my heart. It is a "nonsense" song, where the lyrics are just sung out cacophoneously. (still wondering if that's a word...)

Thanks again!

I loved your stories! from
huffle_puff4eva

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Heh. Tuney always has bad insults in the fics I read, but I haven't come across one where it's helpful until now. Yay!

Well written. I better keep reading, then!

Love always,
Mrs Becky Lupin
xoxoxoxox

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Hmmm...that could be improved with a beta.

I like how the collection (at least you said will) is of differnt types of writing. That's a good idea.

The way you wrote it is good, but you need to structure your setences a little more. Again, this could be helped with either a beta or somebody just to read through it. I know it's hard to pick up your own mistakes. I'd like to help, if you want. I'm trying to biuld up my grammar :P

Good job! I'd like to see where you take these.

Love always,
Mrs Becky Lupin
xoxoxox

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Yehaw!

Love it!

Love always,
Mrs Becky Lupin
xoxoxoxox

Author's Response: :) xxoo

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Arrgggh! Creepy banner! Creepy!

Lovely chapter, darlin'!

Love always,
Mrs Becky Lupin
xoxoxoxoxox

Author's Response: you're creepy :P

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Whee!

I love you, girl! I'm glad I'm your sister!

Update soon!

Love always,
Mrs Becky Lupin
xoxoxoxox

Author's Response: samo

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Heh. A baby.

Well, it was a little short (I give you a frowny face) but it was interesting so you get seven gold stars :)

Love always,
Mrs Becky Lupin
xoxoxox

Author's Response: Thank you.! Can I take away one of my stars to get rid of the frowny face?Because then I'll have 6 stars and no frowny faces!:p

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Muhahaha!

Okay, the only thing I can say that was done badly would probably have to be the lack of talking at Dumbledore's Office. Normally, meetings go on for a little longer than that. Other than that, it was pretty much okay.

Love always,
Mrs Becky Lupin
xoxoxox

Author's Response: Yeah I know it's a bit short, but to be totally honest i'm not too good at writing serious moments like that, but i'll try better next time:0

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Okay, I think I understand about arranged marraiges now (although I am so used to spelling arranged as orainged. A lot like orange, isn't it?).

There is one coming up in a sequel I am writing, and is a main part, although it is taken as more of a humor type thing. Does that mean the sequel has to be 15+ and have a warning of "sensitive topic/issue/theme"?

Thanks!

Becky Lupin

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That is the funniest thing EVER!

I must agree that Andy and Ted are TWO of THE coolest characters in the whole Potter universe. I've been looking for a good Andy/Ted story for a long time. I cried for a good hour and grieved for about...actually, still am grieving.when I read of Ted's death. So horribly sad. I'm in a very bad emotional state. Oh and poor Andy, loosing a husband, a daughter AND a son-in-law. Sniff. So sad.

It's written so well. Don't you dare say you suck or I will find a way to bash your head in. :P I can't wait for an update. It must come very quickly or I WILL be after your head.

Love always,
Mrs Becky Lupin
xoxoxox

Author's Response: Andromeda and Ted are just AMAZING!

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Writers block is bad. Very, very bad. I hate it when I get it. Gag.

I love Sevie. He rocks!

Your grammar is still...the same. I'm starting to think I'll beta it even if you don't want me to. I'm still not completely picturing what Sam and Lucy look like.

Good job!

Love always,
Mrs Becky Lupin
xoxoxoxoxox

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Hey again! :)

Your grammar and spelling is getting a bit better. Not perfect, but getting there. Maybe you should have described Lucy a bit more. I still have no idea what any of the OCs look like.

I think it's great that you are moving the story along quickly. I know I have already reached the 10,000 word mark before I even start the school year/term properly.

You don't have a banner, do you? Well, my mother is getting us PhotoShop and once I learn how to use it, I'll make you one. I know how sucky it must be to have a story without one. I still have no idea how you actually make them appear. I must learn.

Love always,
Mrs Becky Lupin
xoxoxox

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Hey. This sounds like a fairly complicated story line. Those are the best types! Well, I'm trying to be helpful with my reviews so I'll start with your writing.

Your grammar stinks. But, my dear friend, that is fixable if you have a beta. They are quite eay to find (Pst! I'm a beta! Pick me!). Of course, I'll always help :D

Your OC sounds like lots of fun. She is interesting and not in any way Mary Sue-ish. Which is a very good thing. I like how she does normal person type things. It's very normal :)

Well, I'm gonna go read the rest now. Take care!

Love always,
Mrs Becky Lupin
xoxoxox

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Poor, poor Ronykins. I bet living with Ginny would have ruined my childhood. Anyway, great start to a story. I know how hard it is to get it running.

Love always,
Mrs Becky Lupin
xoxoxoxox

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