Reading Reviews From Member: momotwins
496 Reviews Found

Review #1, by momotwinsHurricane Luna: They Meet in a Tree

18th August 2014:
Luna and you have TJ Thyne on the banner? Sold.

You really captured Luna well, with her ethereal qualities, airy speech and sing-song cadences. Great job. I enjoyed your version of Rolf a lot. New head canon. What a perfect meet-cute too! Luna and her imaginary creatures, she's so precious. Your writing is very natural, I like your style. :)

Adding this story to my reading list - great job, I really liked it!

Author's Response: Hi!

Eeep! So excited to see you review this. I love Bones, so TJ Thyne was always going to be Rolf for me - haha! Yay - new head canon. I thought about this a bit and I know that Rolf is usually portrayed as a male version of Luna - spacey yet profound and I really wanted their love story to be a bit more of a struggle for the two of them. So I made him sort of opposite - he is way too grounded and she is in the clouds - hopefully they will meet in the middle ;)

Thanks for all the kind words - this review was awesome!


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Review #2, by momotwinsOne of a Kind: Prologue

18th August 2014:
I haven't read your other story (just skimming a chapter or two in the queue doesn't really count), but I didn't find that detracted from this opening chapter. I'll have to check it out in more detail one of these days.

I like Lucy so far, she's fun. And I totally cracked up at your description of her sister - I also write Molly with dreadlocks (at least right now, since she got rid of the mohawk, and she's planning liberty spikes next). Loving the ecology job idea too. Wizard hippies!

Can't wait to see where you go with this. The summary is seriously awesome.

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Review #3, by momotwinsJust for this moment: See how bright we shine

5th August 2014:
This is so sweet and sad and romantic and just beautifully, tenderly written. You've definitely got a feel for writing this ship, and Remus in particular. I'm not a Wolfstar shipper, this is one of the few I've read that I really enjoyed. I particularly enjoyed the "way too many curls" line ;) Nice one.

Author's Response: Thank you so much for reviewing!! And once again, thank you so so so much for your help with this!! I've never really written this ship (Or Remus... or Sirius...) before, and so I was really nervous about it! I'm really glad that you thought I wrote it well!

Thanks again!


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Review #4, by momotwinsKnight Takes Queen: Rook

4th August 2014:
Your writing is beautiful, homeslice. Good vocabulary in a story makes me super happy. Your word choice is excellent, so evocative, and you paint such detailed pictures that it's like watching a movie. I could totally see the merman leaping and splashing her. I wish I could write description like this, it's amazing. Really well done, can't wait to read more.

Author's Response: Hi Meg! Thanks so much for dropping by! :)

Ah, thank you so much! It's so lovely of you to say so! I got to admit, part of comes because I really, really hate repeating words :P I'm so glad you liked the description, particularly the merman - I've always wanted to write about mermaids because they're such fascinating, beautiful creatures - so it was such a great change for me to do that! :)

Thank you so much for the lovely review - I'm so so glad you enjoyed the story! :)

Aph xx

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Review #5, by momotwinscardiograph: one

28th June 2014:
I really like the way you write. It's just so natural and flowing and organic, it's really a joy to read. Lucy's internal thoughts about her sense of self as it relates to her mother are great. I love her internal monologue, she's got a fantastic voice. So dry and sharp with herself and everyone around her, I love that. Good job, I know you said you weren't sure, but I think it was a very well written chapter.

Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much for the lovely review! I am so glad you enjoy my story and you think it's well written because I was certainly worried about this chapter. I know I'm not the best at responding to reviews, but yeah I really appreciate your comments!

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Review #6, by momotwinsEvent Three - The Plans We Make: The Plans We Make

28th June 2014:
Aw I love this story. It's so funny and cute. I can just see Hermione freaking out about being pregnant and running to Harry to talk about it. I love when she gets all emotional and irrational. And Ron proposes, LOVE. Of course he does. I laughed out loud when Harry said "Gross" about the cells. That is good stuff XD Great job on this! One of my favorites from the Cup. :)

Author's Response: Thank you so so much for reviewing this!! (freaks out a little bit). I think that this is one of those times that Hermione might just lose it.

Thanks so much!! adj;osdfija;!!!


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Review #7, by momotwinsPrompt One: Fluffy Oversized Hummingbirds: Fluffy Oversized Hummingbirds

28th June 2014:
I really enjoyed reading this story. I love your take on Oliver, I can just see him as needing a PR person to help him. He's so focused on Quidditch, he'd probably come off like a big jerk to a lot of people. Kind of cracks me up thinking of it. That last line is so good, "they never saw his joy when the entire charm of Golden Snidgets came to greet him in the gathering dusk, bobbing like friendly lanterns on a gloomy sea", eek great job, I love it. Very well done story!

Author's Response: Thank you for your review! It was completely unexpected, and so it made my day! :D

I thought that Oliver might need some help in dealing with the public because of his absolute focus on Quidditch. When I imagine what could happen if he ran into some rogue fangirls... Haha, it is fairly hilarious. :)

Thank you so much! I was hoping that the connection between "charm of hummingbirds" and "charm of Snidgets" would make sense because I compared the birds to hummingbirds. Thank you, thank you, thank you for your review!! :D


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Review #8, by momotwinsHero: Hero

28th June 2014:
This is a very original idea, and I really love how you wrote it. It's very poignant, just a lovely piece all around. So sad to think of Harry that way, dementia is so terrible. It makes for a great story though, and you wrote it very well. Congrats on your well-deserved Best of Prompt 2 win! :D

Author's Response: Hello!!

Wow, thank you so much! I really loved writing this story even though it was quite sad as the moment is very close to my own heart. Dementia is such a tough thing like you said, and it felt really important to me to portray it with sensitivity and kindness and show how the family faces Harry not quite being himself.

Thank you so much for the lovely review, it really made my day! :)

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Review #9, by momotwinsThree: Luna Lovegood

28th June 2014:
Luna is a difficult character to write, and I think you really captured her. I love how she just brushes off the bullying, it is just totally meaningless to her so it rolls right off. Her fascination with the thestrals is great, it's very her. Very impressed at your Luna! Great job on this story, I really enjoyed reading it.

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the sweet review! Luna really is hard to write so I just try to stick to the basics. And her and thestrals are always a good match. :)

(I may have flailed just a bit that you read and reviewed one of my stories.)

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Review #10, by momotwinsThestrals: Neville

28th June 2014:
This is a lovely little piece. He doesn't even see how strong and brave he is for so long, it's sweet to get to watch him realize it and come into his own. Great writing, I really liked this story.

Author's Response: Thank you! Neville is one of my favourite characters and it's so wonderful that you liked him :)

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Review #11, by momotwinsinfinite (we swear): post life

28th June 2014:
Eek, this is so good. I am in awe, you are very amazing. Your characterization is wonderful, and I love the way you arranged the story, it just all works so perfectly together. I love it. Congrats on your best in prompt! Definitely well deserved.

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Review #12, by momotwinsThe Lucky Girls: The Lucky Girls

28th June 2014:
I love this story, especially the ending. It's just so very sweet, I love the thought of them being lifelong besties like that. So protective. Just perfect cousins! They're so sweet as little girls playing with their dolls, and always so accepting and loving. It's nice to see that kind of friendship and support. Great job with this story.

Author's Response: Hello!! :)

Aw, thank you so much! This story was just so lovely to write and I loved imagining the friendship between the two girls. It's the sort of friendship I think everybody deserves to have in real life.

Thank you so much for the wonderful review! :)

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Review #13, by momotwinsWho Killed Lucy?: Ruptures and Punctures

28th June 2014:
I really liked this story. Despite the sad topic, it was such a fresh take on death's effects on the deceased's loved ones, it was really fascinating to read. I love the line where Molly realizes she's an only child again, it's just so poignant. And about Lucy stealing her heart and going away. Really amazing writing. Great job!

Author's Response: Hi there!

Thank you so much for reading this story. I'm really pleased you liked this, it means so much to me.

Thank you! ♥

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Review #14, by momotwinsThe Passing: glory days, lifetimes, friendships past

28th June 2014:
This is a wonderful story. Sirius and Remus are just spot-on, and their conversation was just so great I don't think I blinked the entire time I read this story. I love how they talked it out and forgave each other in such a GUY kind of way, kwim? They didn't linger on it, they were just like "This is what I was thinking" and then moved on. Good stuff. Fantastic job on this :)

Author's Response: Wow, thank you :) It means a lot getting such a nice review from you! And I really tried to keep it in a guy kind of way too -- I didn't think they were much for inner angst around each other.

Thanks again for stopping by :D

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Review #15, by momotwinsTeddy and Lumpy: Master Adventurer

28th June 2014:
Holy crap, I love this story. Teddy is so adorable, and the horklump was a great choice of magical creature. I hardly ever see them in stories, and I love an underused magical creature. I think your portrayal of 10 year old Teddy was really great, he seemed age-appropriate. He's adorable. Reminds me of my boys. They're nearly 10 now as well. Great story, loved it! Well-deserved on the best in prompt, congrats.

Author's Response: *Blush*

Thanks so much! I have cousins about the same age as Teddy, and they do like to adventure, so I'd have to say that they were my inspiration for developing Teddy.

:D Rumpel

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Review #16, by momotwinsEvent Three - Hold On: Comfort

28th June 2014:
This is so touching. Andromeda is the perfect person to knock some sense into Dennis, to show him he's not the only one suffering. I think you did very well portraying his grief, and Andromeda's as well. Such a great message in this story. I really enjoyed it - even though it's sad, it's also uplifting. Great job.

Author's Response: Hi! I'm so glad you think so! I agree, I was at a loss of what to do with Dennis which would involve him actually overcoming the adversity rather than succumbing to it, and then bam I'm gonna get Andromeda to talk to him. :P I'm really happy you think I portrayed their shared grief well, as I was nervous about that as well.

I'm really glad you enjoyed it and found it uplifting, thank you for this lovely review!

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Review #17, by momotwinsSolace: Comfort

28th June 2014:
This is so very sad, but also so romantic, and I really enjoyed reading it. Even though it made me sad. I think the idea of Oliver bringing her a niffler so she never touches enchanted jewelry again is just genius, that was very clever of you. I keep thinking of it over the past few days since I first read this story, and it's just so great, I love it. I am not normally a big Oliver fangirl, but he's so adorable here, I just love him. Great story!

Author's Response: Hey, glad you could stop by! It was a bit tough for me to incorporate the magical creature idea, because I already had the skeleton of this plot floating around in my mind, but I'm glad it worked well!

I'm definitely pro-Oliver appreciation, so I'm happy to hear that he stuck with you!

Thanks again!


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Review #18, by momotwinsEvent Three - Saving Teddy: Saving Teddy

28th June 2014:
This story completely cracked me up. I just love it. Ah Ron, he's my homeboy, I love stories about him as a dad. I love your characterization of him, it's very canon, and he's perfect as an arachnophobic dad. Love him losing control of his magic cause he's so scared, bless him. I also love that Rose is afraid of spiders too, that's great cause kids often pick up on their parent's fears, sort of adopting them, kwim? Great job!

Author's Response: Ahhh I'm still kinda super jazzed that you reviewed this! Thanks so much!

I love Ron. He's my dude. He's so fun to write! People seem to be afraid of him, but I think he's a blast.

I think of Rose as being very much a mix of her parents. She's got Hermione's passion but Ron's lack of restraint, and Hermione's brains but Ron's lack of motivation and organization.

I'm so glad that you liked this! It really made my day when I saw this review, and I continue to smile every time I see it!


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Review #19, by momotwinsThe Fatal Flaw: The Fatal Flaw

28th June 2014:
I really enjoyed this story (seriously, you are so talented, I would hate you if you weren't also really nice and smart :p ). Sirius and Buckbeak is the perfect combination for this challenge - and it makes me kind of surprised we don't see people write them more often, cause it seems so natural once you read it, you know? Clearly you are a genius for thinking of it and making it work so perfectly. Where's that "Head-canon accepted" gif when you need it? I can't give you any more points than I already did so *throws handful of glitter at you* 10/10, much aloha for you and your writing!

Author's Response: I have so many feelings about Sirius and Buckbeak that came out of nowhere writing this story - I had a vague idea of writing about them when I was trying to come up with ideas for the prompt, then I thought "pride" and "fatal flaw" and came up with this - it was meant to be a lot more angsty, I think, but Sirius's sarcasm came through too strongly for that.

Once again, I'm at a loss for words in response to your lovely review - I've always held you and your writing in such high esteem, so this means so much coming from you - thank you so much!

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Review #20, by momotwinsTo the Very End: To the Very End

28th June 2014:
I love it. It's funny and made me tear up a bit too, which is a combination I love. So sad to think of the two lonely old men in the retirement home, but also so funny to imagine them pranking their fellow inmates. I can just see it, and I hope it's really how they go! It's just so perfect. Lovely job on this one. :)

Author's Response: I'm so glad you enjoyed it! Thank you! +]

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Review #21, by momotwinsHave a Biscuit, Lupin: Have a Biscuit, Lupin

28th June 2014:
I LOVE this story. There are not even enough words to tell you how amazing it is. A well-deserved Best Overall win, with unanimous vote - this story is fantastically done, with the perfect amount of sentiment. Characterization is spot-on. I especially love your McGonagall, and your take on Lupin is excellent. Really amazing job! You are super talented.

Author's Response: This is honestly an amazing review to receive and I'm not sure how to properly respond - a unanimous vote? I have no words for how grateful and happy I am. Thank you so much - to you and the other staffers - for choosing this story, I'm still in shock and it honestly means so much to me.

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Review #22, by momotwinscardiograph: prologue

28th May 2014:
So I've read this twice now, between validating and review swapping, and I think you've got a real talent. Your writing is very natural, your descriptions are vivid and I like your word choices. It's a short prologue, but I think it's just long enough - anything more would have been too sad! Flow and pacing are good. Lucy's seeming emotional detachment is interesting, though she seems so focused on everything physical (the heat of the room, her uncomfortable dress, etc) that I think she's deflecting. I think eventually it will hit her and her reaction will be much worse for having been put off, you know?

The only issue I noticed grammatically was that you don't always capitalize "Mum" or "Dad" when they're being used as proper nouns. So good job on that, really excellent writing!

I'm not sure where the story's going from here, but I think you're off to a great start. I'm interested to see how you handle the characters after this. :)

Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much! I'm so glad you liked it, really it means the world! I've read quite a bit of your writing previously (before I had an account), and your work is definitely a big inspiration for me, so such a lovely review coming from you is completely indescribable! Yeah, know, I think you're right about the reaction- it's definitely going to build up.
Thank you for the tip about the Mum and Dad thing! I actually never thought of the words as proper nouns for some reason so I appreciate you pointing it out haha.
Thank you so much again for the review, it really means the world! I'll go and review something of yours asap!

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Review #23, by momotwinsThe Adventures of Arthur Weasley: Detective Games: Ring a Ring of Roses

15th May 2014:
I'm really enjoying this story so far. I loved George finding out about the bear, that was a great scene. Really well-written! I like your characterizations of the Weasleys too, I think they're very good.

Small note: shine becomes shining, not shinning. That goes with shin. I just taught my kids this rule: the double consonant that a one-syllable short-vowel-sound word takes when forming an -ed or -ing ending is there to keep the short vowel sound. In this case, we want to keep the long vowel sound so we drop the silent e and add -ing. ;)

Aside from that - and it jumped out at me because I just taught it to my kids last week - I didn't notice any grammatical errors, so excellent job! The pace is great on this story. I can't wait for the next chapter :)

Author's Response: I'm glad you came back to read. It took me awhile to update.

Thanks for the tip, I'll try and remember.

Wonderful! This chapter didn't do too much for plot, but the next chapter should make up for it.

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Review #24, by momotwinsAcanthus: The Tale of Acanthus

25th April 2014:
Oh, Scorpius's POV. Excellent - I like Rose but I was hoping we'd get inside his head as well. I always like a romance that shows both sides. Aww curse breaking is a boring job? That's disappointing. Poor guy. You'd think he'd be all Indiana Jones-ish with it.

Your POV switches are very smooth, great job with that. I'll have to review more later, but I'm enjoying the opening to the story!

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked getting see his side of the job too. Yeah, but unlike his father he doesn't like to big himself up too much, so that might be why he said it was boring. Thanks again for another great review, I've loved hearing your thoughts! ♥

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Review #25, by momotwinsAcanthus: Souks and Surprises

25th April 2014:
Yep, that felt like the Khan el-Khalili. I went to Egypt years ago, before all the political unrest, and going through the big souks was amazing. They are REALLY pushy salesmen! lol.

Meeting Dalila was very lucky. Am I being overly suspicious to say it was too lucky? Maybe it's part of a dastardly plot. *ominous music plays* I don't know what, but you never know.

Liking Scorpius so far. He seems like a nice guy. And hey he's a Ravenclaw! I always enjoy non-Slytherin versions of Scorpius. Making him a curse-breaker is an interesting twist.

Author's Response: I know, it is so crazy though (well, Morocco was, so I'm guessing it's similar), so I'm so glad that you thought it was fine, though now I wish more than anything that I could go there myself.

Erm, in this story I would probably say it's best to be overly suspicious of most things and people, but Dalila's fine.

I know, I don't think I've ever made him a Slytherin as it just seems too obvious almost, plus we need more Claws in the world!

Thanks for another fab review! ♥

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