I'm really entertained by this story, daily I come to check and see if any new chapters have been added. The characterization is great, the plot pacing is steady almost always and you do a great job of conveying the characters emotions. On the minus side I think you could improve overall sentence structure some, which would give your story improved flow from one paragraph to the next. Also, if Harry is going to shift to being on informal and relaxed terms with someone he's likely to continue thinking of them that way unless some strong feeling overcomes him or something significant happens, at least IMO. Overall this is a wonderful story and very much one of my favorites. Please get some more chapters up and out to us as I cant wait to see what happens next! :) Keep up the good work.Author's Response: You know, I've always believed that with any venture you undertake, there is one thing that happens that changes your outlook on the entire project. Arcadian, your review was that one thing for me. I had abandoned this story for an indeterminate amount of time, but this review has convinced me to start it up again. The only thing I ask of you(if you are still checking, which I hope you are) is to explain something to me, because I'm having a hard time understanding it. The comment you made about informal and relaxed terms, I'm just having a hard time understanding and implementing it.
To everyone who is still interested in this story, I have ten chapters written, so there is material to post. I'm doing a bit of an overhaul on chapters 9 and 10, just to try and make them the best they can be. I hope each and every one of you continue to enjoy the story, and review if you like. I love reading and responding to reviews. Thanks all.
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