Reading Reviews From Member: donnamichelle
  
48 Reviews Found

Review #1, by donnamichelle:

7th October 2007:
I love the way you write but (and I hate to use the 'but' thing) I feel everything in this chapter was little rushed. I would have liked more pacing from problem to problem. Also the Dumbledore thing was a little far fetched. Don't get me wrong, I find your story very interesting but (again, lol) I don't think he would have answered yes so quickly. You have a talent for writing so just work on the little things and you'll be perfect. :) 10/10

Author's Response: whoa 10/10?! thanks ^_^

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Review #2, by donnamichelle:

7th October 2007:
Its off to a very good start. I am definately interested in reading more. I did notice some grammar problems but nothing major. Hermione stumbling upon the idea to write the column was a little too forced for me. I think it would have flowed better if she took more time to think about it or if there was another situation where someone went to her for help. Anyway you write nicely. Keep it up!

Author's Response: Thank you!

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Review #3, by donnamichelleTête-à-Tête: Tête-à-Tête

6th October 2007:
Very interesting. Not many people can pull off constant dialogue while getting the plot on its way but my dear I think you have. I loved the twist at the end. Great job! 10/10

Author's Response: Thank you so much. This one was quite the challange I assure you. xox

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Review #4, by donnamichelleSeven Minutes in Heaven: Every Word

5th October 2007:
Awww. Great story. Keep writing.

Author's Response: Thank you~

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Review #5, by donnamichelleSeven Minutes in Heaven: Confusing Game!

5th October 2007:
Very nice. I think a bit more detail would spruce up your writing. One thing - I don't think Molly Weasley and Lily Potter were at Hogwarts together. It just doesn't seem possible because Molly had Charlie, Bill, Fred and George before Ron and the oldest son was like almost thirty wasn't he? I'm not sure. :)

Author's Response: Yeah, I know she probably wasn't there then, but I wanted her in it, so whateves. Thanks!

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Review #6, by donnamichelleThe Elite Order: Puzzling Mystery

5th October 2007:
You are a terrific author. Keep up the good work. I enjoyed reading this. 10/10

Author's Response: :) Thanks! Wow, 10/10! *blushes*

I hope you continue to read the future chapters. There is a lot in store for Aileana as well as the others.

Thanks again for reading and reviewing!

~Celtic~


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Review #7, by donnamichelleThe Elite Order: Mysterious Visions

5th October 2007:
Very nice cliffhanger. The story flows very well. Good work.

Author's Response: Thank you for reading! I appreciate it :)

~Celtic~


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Review #8, by donnamichelleMy Ending to Deathly Hallows: A Plan

4th October 2007:
I agree with what you said about this chapter being 'choppy'. It wasn't bad but it could have used a bit more detail and flow. I'm interested to see who that was at the end. Keep it up.

Author's Response: thanks for the review! :)

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Review #9, by donnamichelleHARRY POTTER AND THE MYSTERIES UNVEILED: Truce

4th October 2007:
I was thoroughly confused reading the dialogue between Slughorn and Snape. I never really knew who was speaking and it didn't make sense. The story is coming along very nicely and you write great but I think you should work on dialogue a little more. Maybe add in more, "Harry said." and "Snape replied." just to make it easier to follow. Plot is going great though. =p

Author's Response: Again, yes, I think dialogue is one of my big weaknesses. Actually, I'm going back to this chapter to check because if it is that confusing, obviously it isn't right. I think I got a bit more used to put description in with dialogue later on as several people mentioned this, so thanks very much for pointing this out, I will try to fix it. Thanks

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Review #10, by donnamichelleHARRY POTTER AND THE MYSTERIES UNVEILED: Sanctuary

4th October 2007:
Very interesting start. I don't feel that Harry and Petunia's attitude towards one another matches the characters Rowling had portrayed but you did a nice job.

Author's Response: Yes, this has been pointed out a number of times, but Harry will speak in a more casual way in this story, apart from say in chapter 18 when he is talking to the goblins at Gringotts and is not very happy... I imagine hi getting formal when he is trying to make someone like that feel bad. Petunia, well, she has ulterior motives, but maybe this doesn't come across enough. Thanks a lot though and I'm glad you find it interesting.

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Review #11, by donnamichelle:

1st October 2007:
Can't wait to read more. This chapter flowed much better than the first and I enjoyed reading it. Good job! 10/10

Author's Response: Thanks for the rate!

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Review #12, by donnamichelle:

1st October 2007:
Alright so I'm definately interested. I love the detail you used in the first few paragraphs but maybe work on your flow a little. In these two sentences: *He looked as though many things had happened in his life, but he wouldn’t dare tell anyone about those things. His midnight black hair blew in the wind next to the fair auburn hair of the girl.* You kind of jump from one thing to the next and it is "choppy". Great chapter though and great start. 10/10

Author's Response: Thanks! I'm glad you got interested in the story. I'm trying to work on my flow, thanks for letting me know, I do have some trouble with being choppy. I'm working on it. Thanks for the review, I appriciate it. :]

A.


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Review #13, by donnamichelleForced Enemies?: Hot or Cold?

30th September 2007:
So this is the last chapter I am to review. Your story is brilliant beyond words. I love the character development and plot. I do feel that getting Sirius and Alex together has been a little drawn out but still great. Keep it up! 10/10

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Review #14, by donnamichelleForced Enemies?: Witch Weekly...

30th September 2007:
HeHe.Awesome ending!

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Review #15, by donnamichelleForced Enemies?: Dance With Me...

30th September 2007:
No.get them together already! :p I'm totally addicted.

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Review #16, by donnamichelleForced Enemies?: Lily has News...

30th September 2007:
Little Harry! :p

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Review #17, by donnamichelleForced Enemies?: The Aftermath...

30th September 2007:
Darn. I thought they were finally together. The plot thickens.

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Review #18, by donnamichelleForced Enemies?: Because Alex had grabbed him...

30th September 2007:
Finally! About time. :p

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Review #19, by donnamichelleForced Enemies?: This and That...

30th September 2007:
So much denial. Still reading.

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Review #20, by donnamichelleForced Enemies?: Blind Dates...

30th September 2007:
I loved this chapter. I laughed my butt off. Good work.

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Review #21, by donnamichelleForced Enemies?: I don't believe he did this!

30th September 2007:
Poor Regulas, not! :p

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Review #22, by donnamichelleForced Enemies?: St. Mungo's

30th September 2007:
Its cute that Sirius stayed. I hope they get together soon.

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Review #23, by donnamichelleForced Enemies?: You can keep talking to your will...

30th September 2007:
Oh...I'm on the edge of my seat. I been reading for an hour now and I can't get away from this story. Awesome job!

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Review #24, by donnamichelleForced Enemies?: Merrily Merrily... A Camping We will go

30th September 2007:
Nice twist. Can't wait to read more.

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Review #25, by donnamichelleForced Enemies?: A Camping we will go...

30th September 2007:
Aww I wish they would have kissed. Excellent chapter.

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