Reading Reviews From Member: Selene
77 Reviews Found

Review #1, by SeleneThestrals: Sirius

4th May 2015:
Welp! Happy mood gone now!

I really like how this played out though. I was a little worried when I saw the 500 word count but this was so so good. You really did make every word count.

Its so heartbreaking to see this unknown Muggle being tortured and killed on such a joyous holiday. This is not quality family bonding time people! Bond over Clue or Monopoly!

The scene with the Potters is such a stark contrast. I felt a twinge of apprehension for Sirius when Mrs Potter cut him off, but it was all okay! They wouldn't leave him out in the cold. I've always felt that Sirius was a second child to them. You are not alone Sirius Black.

The only little thing I noticed that could probably be fixed later is Christmas Day. You have day lowercase and I think when referring to the actual holiday its uppercase. Excellent job though!

Thank you for the wonderful read.

Author's Response: Ah, sorry! I apologise. I don't really write sad stories that often, so I'm also kind of glad that it worked in making you sad. But also - you are sad, so that's also not good.

Haha, thank you! I've written a few stories in 500 words now, and every time I go to write one, I think to myself: how am I going to make everything I want say fit into this teeny tiny word count? And then I remember: oh right, I can't write description to save my life. Problem solved!

Bellatrix and Lucius are nasty pieces of work, especially here. The Blacks definitely have a twisted meaning of what it means to bond. And Monopoly tears families apart - I speak from experience :P

Sirius needs like all the hugs all the time, and the Potters realised this. I'm pleased that the feeling came across. They're much nicer people than his biological family, for certain. No traditional yuletide muggle tortures here!

Thanks for that CC! And thanks for the lovely review :)

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Review #2, by SeleneKaleidoscope Love: Oh Comely

1st March 2015:
Seeing all the praise this was getting in the Snake Pit, Ive been wanting to read this for a bit now. Im so sorry it has taken me this long to get to it though!

I first want to say the quote you had in the chapter summary caught my attention. After reading the chapter, and going back to that quote, I feel that it really helped set a tone for the story.

This was brilliant. From the eye catching chapter image to the last word, I was hooked. I enjoyed how you had a moment of Anthony tried to reconcile these feelings with what he had previously known about himself. And you did it in a way that worked with the length of this piece.

I felt myself cheering for them, worrying for them, at one point thinking please tell him how you feel while hoping they both stayed safe. Imagine my little squeal of happiness when they just skipped that part and Ernie just kissed him.

I think one of my favorite lines in this piece is this: Ah, but dont we all? he mused. What else are we to make of our convenient house system that totally wasnt designed to help us prematurely judge people more efficiently?

I paused for a moment on that line. It made me think of one of the flaws I find with the House system. There is so much prejudice and bias towards each of the houses, that unfair labels are automatically placed on the students.

This was a wonderful story, and easily one of my favorites. Thank you for sharing it with us.

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Review #3, by SeleneJust One Memory: Just One Memory

9th February 2015:
Hello again!

This was such a sweet story. It had to be hard for Teddy in a way, growing up without his parents. He'd hear how heroic and brave his parents were no doubt, but I'm sure more than anything he just wanted to know how they were as people. Not the stories of them fighting in the war.

The line "He knew everything about them, but nothing at all" broke my heart! He would probably trade anything to have just a few moments with his parents.

Overall, this story was written really well. The only thing I noticed was near the beginning, in the second paragraph. You have "...grandmother on toe". Did you mean "grandmother in tow," instead?

Wonderful story, Maelody!

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Review #4, by SeleneInside and Under: Inside and Under

9th February 2015:
Hello Maelody!

So, I'm rubbish at reviews so I'm going to start by apologizing in advance.

I picked this story at random and I'm glad I did. You did very well at capturing the emotions of the moment and placing the reader into the Common Room with the Slytherins. I could feel the tension and emotional upheaval as I was reading, and I just wanted to hug the younger students.

What I wasn't expecting to find while reading this story was anger. I never reread Deathly Hallows after it came out, so I completely forgot how angry I was with how the Slytherins were treated during the end of the war. This made me remember that treatment. But not in a bad way, don't worry!

Overall, you did a great job with this piece. You balanced the dialogue and Blaise's private musings very well. I'm curious as to why that Death Eater was at the Slytherin entrance though. Was he coming to 'free' the students? Or was he privately guarding the house from harm? Coming to rid the house of 'undesirables'? I would love to know... ;)

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Review #5, by SeleneSecond Chances: Prologue

14th November 2013:
Oh my goodness, can you see my excited flailing from here? I already want so much more of this story. For a NaNo story, this is dang good! Its so captivating and is a plausible Dramione idea. I have so many questions already hon, which is good since it will make me check this EVERY DAY! I'm pretty sure these questions will be answered later in the story so I'm just going to have to wait, aren't I?

1) How long were Hermione & Ron married?
2) How old are the kids?

I found one grammar error, you had pull threw instead of pull through but its not too major. I know what NaNo is like.

Good luck on NaNo dear, and I cannot wait to read more of this!

Author's Response: Selene, your support for this story is what really makes me continue on! I'm so glad that you have stopped by already and have left me a review! Wow, only that one mistake, I would have figured this chapter would be riddled with them! The kids are very young and I dont think that it follows the actual series.. if it does, that will be very impressive since I just pulled ages out and went with it. Thanks again for reading and reviewing!


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Review #6, by SeleneJar of Hearts: Jar of Hearts

12th March 2012:
I just realized I never reviewed this. -sheepish-

I remember watching you as you wrote this, the frustration in your voice at times and the doubt. You pulled through and you were strong and this chapter is fantastic. The characterizations were wonderful, if a little OOC at times, but I know that is what you wanted & needed for this. And Neville...Neville is love. I truly believe this could expand into a short story or one-shot collection.

If you expand this story, or the next time you post something which I hope is soon, I wouldn't mind seeing a little more of Hermione's, or the character of the submission, thoughts or feelings. And as some CC, remember to use some more of the senses to help paint a mental image. For the first person POV, I bow to you oh great one. You seem to have a good grasp of it. I could continue for ages on this but I think you know what I'm trying to say.

Great job hon, and I can't wait to see whats next for Hermione and Neville!!

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Review #7, by SeleneUntainted: Victorious

8th March 2012:
First of all, let me just say I don't read many next-gens outside of validating. So this will be interesting! :) Also I like to type up the review as I read, so if it sounds odd... -laugh-

I enjoy how you portray her as an eleven year old, and you convey the feelings very well. We've all been in that unsure spot at some point in our life, afraid to let go of what we know to face the future but willing to go at the same time.

Aww they're so cute together!! Why haven't I read more of this ship before now? I know you have one of the genres labelled as fluff, but you keep it at the right level so its just enough. Not too mushy to make the ready just stare at it as though they've just drank pure sugar, but enough to make us smile at their cuteness. Very good!

This is a touching story, academica. I enjoy how you portrayed many important moments in their life. Having the whole chapter centered made it read a little wonky at times but that might just be my preference of things. Thank you for the enjoyable read!

Author's Response: That doesn't sound odd at all, considering that I use the same method when composing reviews, at least for the most part :)

It's great to hear that Victoire's eleven-year-old self came across well. I find it's harder for me to write young students as compared to young adults, so I'm always happy to hear that I've done it correctly.

I also don't read or write a lot of next-gen, but I'm trying to open myself up to it more, and this story was a first step. I really like Teddy and Victoire, and I do think they're cute :) It's good to hear that I effectively toed the line between fluff and romance. I definitely wouldn't want it to be nauseatingly mushy.

The centered text works for some people and not for others. I don't usually do it, but I wanted to try it out for this piece. I'm glad it didn't impede your enjoyment too much :)

Thanks for your lovely review! I apologize that the response took so long.


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Review #8, by SeleneHornsack Potion: Hornsack Potion

14th February 2012:
Okay, I'm just going to start out by stating flat out I'm horrid with reviews which is probably why I don't leave them that often. :)

Gurtz, this was very enjoyable to read. I love stories with Luna in it, so I had to click this one after seeing the summary. You described Ron's thoughts and emotions in such a way that we could see and feel them clearly, without feeling as though we were drowning in them. The story was so short and sweet, even with such sad beginnings. I would love to see more between them but alas I shall be content with this one-shot.

Thank you for an enjoyable read! Happy Valentine's Day, or Excuse to Give Gifts to Your Friends Day!!

Author's Response: Aww, thanks Selene! I don't think you're horrid at reviews. :P Glad you liked it!

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Review #9, by SeleneBefore The Wedding: Before The Wedding

8th August 2011:
I don't usually read one-shots Drecklin, but this one caught my eye as I browsed your author page. I'm so very glad that I clicked on this though. The detailing you gave was magnificent. I felt as though I could reach and touch Narcissa's wedding gown you described it in such detail. I wish for nothing more than her to find happiness in her marriage; you gave such a twist to their relationship I don't recall ever seeing before. It makes me wish for more, to see how the two adapt in their marriage. If she ever finds happiness, even if for just a few moments.

Thank you for such a wonderful read Drecklin!

Author's Response: I am so glad you liked this little diddy here :) It always makes me so happy to read such a great review. Thanks again, Selene- you're a doll!!

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Review #10, by SeleneFlashes Of The Future: Flashes Of The Future

18th March 2011:
Oh wow, this is dark. It made me sit back and be afraid of Riddle. You weren't overly descriptive with the violent bits, you gave us as readers just enough detail to send our imagination into overdrive. Wonderful job on that, some writers will go into way to much detail and make a reader squeamish.

You're depiction of Tom was actually inspiring, if that makes any sense. I feel like a light bulb has gone off in my head as I find Tom/Voldemort the hardest character to write. He's just so evil, that I wind up making him seem a pansy since I don't know how to even start pulling him off right. Heck this whole thing is inspiring in a way, not just in a dark sense but in a writing sense.

I'm adding this to my favorites when I submit this review. Thank you for the read!

Author's Response: Hey!

First things first, I am so sorry for taking so long with this review reply. I really do appreciate you taking your time to read and review this story; real life has been hectic lately, so it's taken me away from HPFF.

My response to this review is just: wow. Thank you so much for your kind words; it means more than you will know.

I definitely agree with you about the darkness of this piece and that was honestly something I found hard to deal with. I have never attempted something so dark and twisted, so it was really difficult. I am so glad you think I didn't go overboard with the description, though, as being too adjective-friendly is something I've always had a problem with.

As for Tom's character: thank you so much for the compliments on that. I found him so difficult to write, especially as a child. I didn't know whether he was out of character or too evil to be realistic, so your review is very reassuring.

Thank you so much once again!
-- Jordan

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Review #11, by SeleneTom's War: Tom's War

13th March 2011:
Adding to favorites now!

This was spectacular! I love Tom/Minerva stories and this is my favorite thus far. The fact that you actively incorporated The War while they are at Hogwarts is something I've never seen but have always wondered about.

Thank you so much for a wonderful story, ciara!

Author's Response: Thank you! That's amazing to hear. I actually have never read a Tom/Minerva. I have no idea where the plot bunny for this came from, but it arrived and required dealing with immediately.

Thank you so much!!!

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Review #12, by SeleneErebus: always watching

13th March 2011:
I'm amazed by this, you have amazed me. Folks on the forum sent me this way when I asked for stories of this ship and I'm so glad they did.

I truly enjoyed how you wrote this. That it wasn't a reflection on years gone by, but the years of their prime. We see McGonagall as an older woman so often, that its easy to forget that she too was a student and a young woman once upon a time. But reading this, you can picture her walking along the grounds as a young lady of her times.

Thank you so much for such a wonderful read. This ship needs many more fans to join us.

Author's Response: wow really? thank you so much hun. i am really really thrilled you enjoyed this. i don't know what else to say except thank you and i am glad you appreciate what i have done with the characters.

i agree- tomerva all that way!

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Review #13, by SeleneDon't Look Back: Don't Look Back

13th March 2011:
This was wonderful. A quick taste into what can be called the forbidden relationship. I would recommend this story to readers that were curious about the pairing, to give them a taste of the possibilities. I really enjoyed reading this, thank you for giving me the link.

In a writing aspect though, 'she' was used quite a lot. I know that writing in first person can be difficult and you did a wonderful job writing this other than the heavy use of that pronoun. Thank you for this read! I can't wait to read your Tom story when its up.

Author's Response: Hey!
I'm so glad you enjoyed this. I tried to keep in more of a memory piece, rather than digging deeper into their relationship, just to get a feel for the pairing. When (there is a when, not if - I love the ship now) I write this ship again, I think I will be more comfortable with it and go deeper.

I definitely agree with the 'she' pronoun; I have such a bad habit of that, simply because writing the name gets a little tedious, I find. I will go back and edit that, though. ><

Thanks so much for your compliments! I hope you enjoy the Tom story when it's up.

Have a great week!
-- Jordan

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Review #14, by SeleneFor the Sake of Victory: For the Sake of Victory

5th March 2011:
Oh wow, I'm glad I decided to read this one! I really liked the idea of Snape selecting his house, let alone Ravenclaw. But in a way, it does make sense that if he weren't a Slytherin he'd be a Ravenclaw. One doesn't master potions like he did without being studious and dedicated...or a tad bit mad and obsessive.

I enjoyed this one-shot, especially with how you portrayed Snape. You showed that he didn't become a Spy for the glory of his actions. He knew he'd be hated, but he was a loyal and brave man, dedicated to his cause. A Gryffindor is some ways, I suppose. Thank you for a pleasant read, since I don't usually read one-shots.

Slytherins - Dominating the World - One review at a time!!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! I love my housemates! This one was written as a challenge piece and when I thought about it, Ravenclaw was the only other house I could imagine Snape being in. Thanks for the read!


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Review #15, by SeleneJust Malfoy: A life less ordinary

30th March 2010:
I'm so sorry this has to be so short since this chapter was excellent but I have class in less than 5 minutes. This chapter was wonderful, and I just want to grab Lily and comfort her. I'm so attached to this. You did a wonderful job and I really can not wait to read more. James handled it a bit better than I was expecting, but after thinking, its what any big brother would do. I can't wait to see how Scorpius handles this. Wonderful chapter!

Author's Response: Yeah, James is largely the bad guy in this story, but that's partly because I'm writing it from Lily's point of view, and she may be a little biased; he actually has some good points too, and certainly loves his li'l sis.

Please, you have less than nothing to be sorry about - you've just reviewed every chapter of this story with useful insight; that is.. well there aren't adequate words for how awesome that makes you.

Next chapter up any time now, but be warned, Scorpius may not handle it as well as you'd hope...

Thanks again; off to write the epilogue!

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Review #16, by SeleneJust Malfoy: Stupid Cupid

30th March 2010:
Okay. This was brilliant. He gave her chocolate on Valentine's Day, they kissed, they got busted. Oh wow. I'm trying very hard to not have a fangirl moment. This was wonderful, excellently written. I'm so sad that there is only one other chapter up and waiting, I'm so addicted. Wonderful job.

Author's Response: Then you will be pleased to hear that the next chapter is awaiting validation, and the last proper chapter is being beta'd - just the epilogue to write.

Yeah, this is definitely the eventful chapter - I had this written before I'd even started chapter two, so I'm glad it was worth it. Thanks so much!

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Review #17, by SeleneJust Malfoy: Lies, white and otherwise

30th March 2010:
Oh I'm definetly still reading. Not getting any work done, but still reading. I'm loving this! He noticed that she put some effort into her appearance, that was so sweet!

Okay, okay, I'm calm. No more gushing. This is going great Capella, and you are so very talented. I am 100% addicted to this story. She doesn't want to let him go...okay next chapter.

Author's Response: So, I got no work done when writing this, and now I've stopped you working - this story is officially bad for the economy!

Please, gush away; I'm now looking like the Cheshire cat as a result! Glad you're still enjoying, reading, and taking the time to review!

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Review #18, by SeleneJust Malfoy: Two's company, five's a complete nightmare

30th March 2010:
Poor Lily! Stuck in a family love triangle, that has to be so awkward for her. Her friends coming to her for advice on her cousins. But that dream at the beginning, wow! She's falling hard for Scorpious, and I think I know what his happy thought was. I'm sorry I sound like such a gushing kid right now, but I'm really enjoying this story. I guess there are a lot of perks of writing in first-person.

Author's Response: Yup - I'm currently writing two stories, one in first person, one in third. Got to say, generally I find first person easier, though sometimes it can be really difficult to set up plot twists believably - see chapter nine for example!

Awkward is definitely the word - wouldn't be her for all the magic in the world (well, OK I would, but it would be a tough decision!) And yeah, you probably do know; it won't be revealed in this story, though I am writing a 'companion piece' from Scorpius' point of view.

Thanks for reviewing!

Thanks so much for reviewing!

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Review #19, by SeleneJust Malfoy: All work and no play

30th March 2010:
I really enjoyed this chapter, and had a momentary memory lapse wondering why Goyle didn't have any children...*blush*

Really though, this story is getting better by the chapter and I'm loving it. I added it to my favorites finally. And no, I didn't find this chapter dull and obviously I made it to the end. It did seem to lag a bit when she was being taken to the hospital wing, but it was a necessary spot and set up another moment for the two of them.

Author's Response: If you think that's bad, imagine how silly I felt when, after posting this, I realised it was Crabbe that died in the Room of Requirement, not Goyle. My clearly lame excuse is that they're Vincent Crabbe's nephews... yeah, my bad. So actually Goyle may well have kids, though really, would you have kids with him?

Yeah, I found the hospital scene hard to write (crustacean pun aside), but as you said, it had to be done. Still, might have a look at it, give it a tweak or two.

Thank you so much for all your encouraging words - you are awesome.

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Review #20, by SeleneJust Malfoy: Sparks Fly

30th March 2010:
Well, that explains what he needed help with. Poor Scorpious, you just want to hug the boy. The Potter/Malfoy rivalry lives on even through their children sadly. This is very very good, and I just can't stop reading which is a good thing for you since I review. I keep wondering what will happen when her family finds out about these lessons. Please tell?

Author's Response: Well, they're not going to be thrilled, I feel. However, never underestimate Lily's ability to keep a secret, so it may be a while before we find the answer to that. Good to know you want to hug him - he's definitely not the most loved individual in this story.

So happy you're enjoying this, as your reviews are encouraging me to get round to the epilogue at last! Thanks!

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Review #21, by SeleneJust Malfoy: Help is a four letter word

30th March 2010:
Lily's reaction was very realistic, you don't have to worry about that. I'm still interested in this and am slowly becoming addicted to this paring. You're doing good, I'm not finding any grammar issues that would need pointing out and I'm really interested about what her secret is. What is it?

Author's Response: Well, from my review page, it seems that you have now discovered the answer to that! Hope it didn't seem too clichéd when you did find out, but glad to know I've kept you reading thus far.

Thanks for another lovely review!

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Review #22, by SeleneJust Malfoy: Gratitude will get you nowhere

30th March 2010:
One probably shouldn't read the first part of this chapter while multi-tasking or you could possibly choke. I don't really have much to say about this chapter other than I enjoyed it and I'm very curious. You're a very talented writer, thank you for sharing your talents with us.

Author's Response: Sorry for any inadvertent attempts on your life. Hope the answers don't let you down, after such a lovely review.

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Review #23, by SeleneJust Malfoy: Boys will be boys

30th March 2010:
This was a very good chapter, Capella, and the characterization was wonderful. It brings up excellent points. Albus and Scorpio dislike each other for something that happened in their first year, but he can't remember what and James dislikes him for prejudice reasons and because its like looking in a mirror in a way. You have me hooked and I am enjoying this story.

Author's Response: Glad you liked the reasoning, or lack thereof - I find this is so true in real life; 'I haven't spoken to them in a while, so I must have had a good reason!'

Thanks for reading and reviewing; I'm very glad you're hooked!

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Review #24, by SeleneJust Malfoy: Scorpius

30th March 2010:
Holy crap! Any review I may have had just went out the window with that ending! That was a surprise for sure, but I really liked it. I'm really glad that I came out of my reading comfort zone and picked a type I don't usually read. This is reading really well so far, and I'm enjoying it. I'm off to the next chapter now!

Author's Response: Hurrah! It's supposed to come as a surprise, but I think you are the first person to see it that way, so thanks so much for letting me know I succeeded at least once! Glad you're enjoying it, and thanks for reviewing.

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Review #25, by SeleneLong Forgotten: Long Forgotten

30th March 2010:
Oh my goodness. This was wonderful, I'm nearly crying because it is so touching to me. For a first story, you did a very good job.

This isn't a story I usually read, since its in a first-person point of view and a one-shot but I am very very glad that I gave it a try. I wish there were more chapters to this, or even a second one-shot to see Neville after he fulfilled his promise to them.

Not having a summary available without clicking on the title might make some people skim over it, but the banner and title worked in dragging me in for a closer look. And having consecutive sentences starting with 'I' can be a bit distracting, but I still found this a touching story. I'm interested to see what you do next with your writing and I'm adding this story to my favorites. Happy writing!

Author's Response: Oh wow - this was such a lovely review to read. I'm so glad you enjoyed it.. and super thank you for my first favourite! :D

I think about your advice next time I write. I understand what your talking about. It can get repetitive writing in first person - hopefully one day I'll find a good technique.

My next one-shot is just a light-hearted piece. It's not going to change the world, but it's refreshing to write something fun!

Really, it was so wonderful to get such a positive review. Thank you for taking the time to review - it means a lot!

P.S My computer was acting strange and I was having trouble with the summary after I added my banner. I'll go investigate... thank you for telling me!

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