Victoire is completely adorable. I wish that Teddy were reciprocating all that adorableness. Is it just Chloe that has him holding back combined with Cameron's doubts or is there something else? He seems really distant. It is distressing. Report Review
Seriously? He makes it sound so easy. I cannot believe he said she wouldn't have him in front of her whole family. I was completely - just - it was not a good moment; I may not agree with Victoire in all things but I agree with her reaction to that. They are both rather childish when prodding each other and he brings the fun out in her; they are well suited. He likes her. Aw.
I very much did not like that Dominique came into Victoire's room and confronted her only to insult her when Victoire reacted defensively. I mean, it's not as though she is inclined to admit such a thing when addressed so confrontational-y. Report Review
Rose needs to move on. The very fact that she's uncertain of what she wants with Scorpius (whether she wants him enough) makes it rather evident that he is not who she wants; he's made it evident that he will not wait for her, which, I think, shows either the depth of his feelings or his maturity. They seem stuck in this place of not yet or not enough that makes them seem not right for each other. I guess they need to just get unto a room together to know for certain if there are still feelings between them. I do not enjoy any suggestions of revenge. I don't want this all to be a ploy to get Rose home, nor do I believe this is the case. I do feel as though this wedding business could have been handled more delicately so that Lily would not have been ostrisized from much of her family, and Rose would not have felt so very (rightly, actually, completely) wronged. Scorpius' haste gives me pause, and his lies are flimsy - it seems his father is hesitant to accept them. Ultimately I find it doubtful that he wants the roses to bloom for the wedding because of a romantic whim but, for his sake, things may work out best if things were as simple as that; he and Lily fell in love. Rose and he have some talking to do at the very least, I should think he'd want to clear the air before he marries into her family.
Ron Weasley is completely right. Always. It's no wonder that Rose loves him best. He is difficult not to love best.Author's Response: You've hit the nail on the head when it comes to Rose (I probably have said that about your reviews for this story before, but it applies here just as well - you "read" Rose's character perfectly, and it's fantastic to find readers who do so. I do this with stories far too often, so it's a treat to have someone do it to my characters). She's very confused, and much of the story is about her personal growth away from Scorpius, away from her adolescence, and into a new life - one in which she can make her own way in the world. At this point in the story, the idea that she doesn't love Scorpius is in her mind, but she's stuck on the fact that they had something once, and that he appears to have moved on without her. She knows that he's not right for her, but she still feels possessive about him.
To be honest, even by the end of this story, I could not find a suitable excuse for Scorpius's behaviour here - his haste and disregard for those around him. I could just put it down to his selfishness, but that doesn't seem to fill in all the blanks. There are hints of revenge, of Scorpius purposely rubbing Rose's nose in the dirt, but at the same time, it backfires on him because he handles it so poorly as you've noticed. It says a lot about him, actually, and the kind of person he is, effectively adding proof to your argument that he's not right for Rose at all. They're not opposites, but they have very different understandings of people and emotions, and it makes them pretty much incompatible.
Glad that you like Ron - it was wonderful to make him right instead of making him into that cliched overbearing father that comes up too often in fanfiction. I'd like to think that he'd make a good father, one who can understand Rose (if even to a degree) and who can push her in the right direction, by the end. ;)
Thank you for this terrific review! I hope that you continue to find much to discuss about the remainder of the story. :D Report Review
I think she's going to end up keeping the peace. The Potters seem completely out of sorts. I very much doubt that her dad would 'told you so' her about Scorpius now - things will be complicated enough. Malfoy's comment makes me think Lily may be pregnant but I'm inclined to doubt this as this would be too convenient an explaination, and result in more rushed nuptuals. I still feel that Rose did the right thing in going to China to study, explore and discover; my impression of Rose's relationship with Scorpius is unfavourable - he seemed sweet but pushy, lacking selfless consideration and empathy - it seemed almost forced. It would have been nice if he appreciated Rose's ambition and acknowledged her need for adventure.
How can he say he love her and only to become engaged to her cousin?
How could Lily date him?
Poor Albus.Author's Response: Yes! You read the characters perfectly well, especially Rose and Scorpius. She was much better off leaving, and I think she knows it inside - on the surface, she's upset that Scorpius would treat her so lightly and carelessly, but she did the right thing in pursuing her career, which holds a lot more meaning for her in the long run. As for Scorpius, my way of understanding him and Lily's relationship was that he convinced her that she was pregnant so that she would stick with him - it's a cruel thing, and I don't know if it's actually plausible, but it's part of his strategy of manipulating others to suit his purposes.
While writing these early chapters, I was unsure about how to characterize the Potters, which is why their portrayal is a bit flimsy at the moment. Albus improves - at least I think so - and I give him the excuse of enjoying exaggeration, making things seem far worse than they really are in his letter.
Thanks very much for reading and reviewing! I'm looking forward to seeing what you think about the characters in future chapters. ;) Report Review
Hide and stare at him; that is a great start and so very not creepy. I think she's going to be quite easy to fall for, actually. She's honest - I agree that shouty/accusatory/super-bossy Lily is a bit of an attention whore (I strive to be not bothered by her).Author's Response: Haha I'm glad you liked that line! And I'm glad you're "falling" for Avery. Yes, I wanted to depict Lily differently since she's usually holyier than thou. Thanks for the review : )
~Lauren Report Review
Golly, these Weasleys have a tendancy toward the dramatic. I do not enjoy the idea of trouble with Toby, not remotely. He is all sorts of wonderful, and, although lack of argument and disagreement is odd, I find Lily's dissatisfaction infinitely more troublesome. Rose is, as always, a star. I can't believe Lily turmed Scorpius; it is a mildly perfect development. Revelations regarding Molls are rather shattering. Similarly Lucy. They are opposites in so many ways but the results are the same, almost. For now.Author's Response: Their life is a theater piece, really XD They just don't know it yet.
Toby is wonderful and their little 'problem' does not affect their individual awesomeness. It's not anything the matter with Toby or with Lily, for that matter. It's something to do with them as a couple. It'll flesh itself out in the next couple of chapters :D
Glad you liked the story! Thanks for the review! Report Review
Of course Rose was involved with an older man. It's funny how easily Rose admits to still liking him in spite of his unrecommendable behaviours, actions, and history. I love Gorgeous; it is a thing all girls suffer through, apparently. Report Review
Elliot is very persistent which seems to be precisely what is needed to get to know Madeline. I like that she has yet to admit to liking Elliot - with words - it's rather endearing really.
I wonder who her father's lot are.Author's Response: Elliot is a pro at persistence, and Madeline is in denial about many thing, so admitting such a thing would take a miracle, haha. Thank you so much for reviewing, I hope you enjoy! Report Review
Poor Molly. Jozlin Plank sounds like quite the nutter. I mean, why does she go around sticking her wet hands in peoples faces? It sounds very rude. Oh, and Rose - I don't have words, really. Red lipstick? Really? I can't stop laughing. Poor Molly. At least Lucy knows the truth. I really quite like that Lucy knows the truth.Author's Response: Thank You! I find that I like writing Lucy Report Review
I enjoyed this story so very much. Lucius doesn't even realize what she's done to him - she made his eyes twinkle for goodness' sake. I really like that he is so entitled; I cannot fathom how you managed to make his entitled airs charming but you did so exceedingly well that I don't quite want to analyse it too much. Narcissa is sweet and just manipulative enough to be intriguing. I loved that are both so very clever and everthing else was understated. Cheers. Report Review
That was not at all what I expected. Of course I would want this story to go on forever and have read more of the delicious tension that Rose resolutely ignored (until she, apparently, didn't) and all of the specifics of everything to do with Rose and Teddy and about the Golden Age of Great Britain with Hermione as Prime Minister(!)... Too much too hope for maybe? But I digress, I loved this story and the choice set before Rose. It's all so promising. Again, it wasn't what I expected, but it exceeded many expectations marvelously. Report Review
Theodore. I love that she called him that, it adds due gravity and feels a little like she's prodding him. I suppose that Teddy is a member of the neo DA - although I suppose now we should call it something like Potter's Army. I really like that Teddy's not bitter - I half expected him to show regret or something but in the end he seems more determined than anything (which, incidentally, is totes awesome). He wants Rose's help. It's really neat that she's the only one who he would want to have beside him and rather convenient that her expertise is exactly what this mission needs. Oh, Sensible Rose, what shall you do? Is there even a choice, really? Report Review
Of course it was Nick. Poor Lily. James is hilarious. As is Victoire. Being the oldest and least reasonable of the lot. I love that Nick didn't get upset or even put off by the Potter Weasley reaction. That sort of added to the absurdity really. I quite enjoyed it. So Lily is more or less a couple counsellor then - I wonder if she dates much at all or if she's been pining after Nick...Author's Response: Thanks so much for the review :) I know, the whole lot are crazy. So far, I think she hasn't had much to do with love, but I'm sure that's all gonna change . . . you'll just have to keep reading :) x Report Review
Lily is ridiculously, endearingly awkward. I love her. Poor Nick doesn't stand a chance. Rose is so spirited and funny but I also find her a touch overbearing. Your writing is very enjoyable. I did find that there were parts where the descriptions tended to drag - as was the case in introducing Amy. Overall, however, I found it really funny and sweet - like how Lily and Hugo could be mistaken for twins (oh, those dominant Weasley genes). I think that bit was my favourite other than the 'Lily moons over Nick whilst he remains totes oblivious' bit.Author's Response: thanks, sorry about the whole TOO MUCH DESCRIPTION! thing, there probably won't be any more like that now I've introduced the main characters :) I've always thought of Lily as the cute-but-awkward one, and I thought it would make a change from the stories where she's wize and together - becuase this Lily definately isn't! thanks again for the review x Report Review
Ew. Poor Rose. Lucy and Lily are so wonderful. I love them so much. I don't know about this hen party business. Does the combination of bridal shower/hen party exclude mums - as much as I'd love a Hermione or Ginny cameo I'd really prefer them to be fully dressed. Molly is so funny. I love that she doesn't know how to react to that absolutely sweet message from her future husband (I officially love Audrey by the by) and therefore chose to ignore it for the time... she's too much. Report Review
I have no words. This wedding is starting to sound rather promising. Perhaps Rose's soul mate will pop out of it all d: I love how quickly Lucy's spirits perked. I find it funny to no end that Rose goes on dates set up by her boss. The thing about blind dates is that the bloke's probably feeling as awkward as she was and might have not been actually himself so much as his horribleovercompensatingalterego self. I dunno. Maybe I'm just another hopeless optimist. Report Review
Rose, it seems, only improves on acquaintance. I love how candid and pushy she is with people. Not so much manipulative as prodding and coaxing, encouraging even. I am so odd, for a moment I had totes convinced myself that Gorgeous had a thing for Rose... honestly. I am really relieved that Lucy is not half as obtuse as I had feared she would be. She sees Rose and Molly for who they really are and isn't so much kidding herself about her relationships as she is hopeful. Poor Lucy. Maybe she just needs to go for a different type of bloke. Report Review
Toby! Golly, what a pair. I am so pleased that there is one couple that is content to simply be together. Lily and Toby seem so right - natural, really. Their story is so sweet and I find it really lovely how honest and reasonable Lily is about her relationship. c: Report Review
I love Lily. So much. I think that Rose and Molly are too sweet - I love that they're trying to comfort little Lucy. Lucy seems a bit misguided by her own assumptions of what a relationship is supposed to be - it's like she unsure of what she wants. Report Review
I love Dom! She's so persistent and clever. I want Teddy to ask her for help. He needs it (desperately). Honestly, the boy is totes completely lost. I love the way he talks to Victoire - he's candid and sincere and I want her to believe him and respond (for once). I like the Teddy chapters because Victoire is so unsure of herself - I want her to be fantastic and I am usually on her side morally but I can't agree with her because of her pretended indifference- also her friends are horrible(!) always whinging or mocking or gossiping. It's tiresome. I want Victoire to have friends that are as wonderful as she could be.
(I don't think any of that made much sense. Sorry. I love your story!)
c:Author's Response: I love writing her! She comes very easily, she's like the relief for the story. Teddy's very stubborn, but it could happen... eventually. He does. He is very lost, but most teenage boys are. Well, one of them has to be since Victoire never voices her true feelings. She will... later. The Teddy chapters come a little easier, Victoire always has me stuck. She's very frustrating because she's so insecure. Her friends are horrible, but she isn't! They're pretty much your stereotypical teenage mean girls. It is. Hmm... maybe it'll happen.
Haha, no, don't worry, it made sense! Thank you! And thanks so much for reading and reviewing! :)
Amandax Report Review
I love that, despite everything, he is ultimately the one who ended up offended and disgruntled. I find it a bit funny how they struggle so much and cannot get past presumptions. Not funny 'hah hah' but funny nonetheless.Author's Response: They're both very sensitive. There's always misunderstandings that just screw everything up even more. I guess in a ironic funny way?
Thank you for reading and reviewing! :) Report Review
Poor lovely Lily. I want none of this to have ever happened (but that doesn't make any sense and you write it so well). The broomstick - there are no words for how much I love that you included the broomstick and the fact that Harry fell (a very Harry thing to happen afterall). I think that it is unlikely that Lily wouldn't of known (Dumbledore didn't know, nor Remus I think) but it suits the story so I don't mind at all really. Oh, James. That was quite a lot of sick going on with James, poor guy. He's very sweet. Report Review
Oh, no. Molly. What does he mean he "can't"? How can he say something like "I wouldn't do that to you"? He totes did do 'that'... clearly. Urg. No. Teddy? I mean, seriously. I love that Molly is a florist. It's quite a romantic thing herbology... I like it. Report Review
It's sweet. Teddy and Victoire are totes that couple. The couple that were together before they even realized they were a couple. I love sentimental Victoire, you write her wonderfully. Report Review
Moppet is terribly clever. It's no wonder Molly likes him so much. I loved it - all of it a whole lot - of course. Report Review
Terms of Service
categories & genres
short story collection