hahaha. wow, this is so funny and sweet at the same time. i had such a good feeling about this story, i added it to my faves before even reading it:]Author's Response: Thanks! This one-shot was so much fun to write, and I'm glad you liked reading it =). Report Review
"Oh snap, this is the sickest wedding I’ve ever been to!"
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That's something I would say! Hysterical. This was such a great story, I had fun reading every minute of it. I'm a canon freak so some of the dialogue wouldn't sync with the glorious 70's, but hey, I laughed out loud often and I enjoyed it so much it didn't even matter. I love your James, he is exactly the way I imagine him to be: arrogant but lovable, full of himself but endearing. The kiss at the end was terrific; trust Lily to make the first move after having run away from him for years and years.
I can't think of anything I don't like! GREAT job! :)Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! I have tried writing in 70's speak and failed miserably, so I sort of threw it out the window. I'm glad it isn't too big of a deal =). It makes me so happy that people like my maniacal portrayal of James Potter. And I do think Lily had quite a bit of chutzpah, and could certainly make the first move. Report Review
"hunky mansicle" haha.
I loved this story. It was very funny. I like how you portrayed james as an awkward teenager. I also like how he'd had a whole big family planned, it made me even sadder for James and Lily, but it was a great addition. enough kids to have a Quidditch team.
great job!!Author's Response: I actually say things like "hunky mansicle" =). I'm so glad you liked this fic and my slightly unorthodox portrayal of James. There is a tiny layer of sadness under the humor, thinking about "what could have been". Report Review
I liked it!
A few spelling and grammar mistakes, but apart from that, I really liked it!
You should have mentioned what happened with Rhian and Sirius/Remus!
EmmiChick xxAuthor's Response: Thanks for your review! Eventually I hope to give this one last proofread ;). Report Review
Aww, that was a really sweet little Jily one-shot! James's outbursts were so cute, and I loved the Angel Moony/Devil Padfoot thing, because no doubt that would be exactly what they would say. I loved the bit about the family, you must have thought long and hard about that, and I loved the Team Potter thing. I can definitely imagine that being Prongs's fantasy. I also love how you decribed how James saw Lily, and I loved the last line. Very fitting. I also liked the Memos to Himself thing. That made me laugh. Overall, brilliant. 10/10
~KatieAuthor's Response: Thanks so much! This was the first random, zany thing I ever wrote, and all you folks seem to find it entertaining =). I actually did put a lot of thought into the Potter Clan That Could Have Been, since it's almost a bittersweet sentiment. And the James and Lily bit at the end...I hope it did their characters justice, and avoided as many bad clichés as possible. I'm so glad you liked the fic! Report Review
oh my god! I wicked loved the story. ((This is Ms. Lizzie from the New Year's Challange)) It definatly meets the requirements! It made me laugh so much! Thank you for submitting it!Author's Response: Thanks! I'm glad you liked it! Report Review
LOL thats funny and one of the best stories i read :]
ha ha ha shoe humor :P
keep writing and i'll give it a 10/10 :]Author's Response: Thank you! Glad you liked. Hee hee, shoe humor. Report Review
That has to be one of the funniest stories I have ever read in my entire life. You captured James essence perfectly and his thoughts on kids and himself are absolutely hilarious.
Kudos to you. :DAuthor's Response: Thanks for reviewing! So glad you like the one-shot! It kind of just came to me all at once, and all I had to do was write it down. Report Review
Ahahahahaha! This was great. Loved it.Author's Response: Glad you liked! This one-shot was mad crazy fun to write. Report Review
awww thats so cute! and james plans out like thier whole life, 7 children! team potter! its so funny how he says everything his thinking.. lol. this was a great story!Author's Response: This is actually the "prequel" to We Gryffies. Sort of. I based James II on James I, and We Gryffies sort of rolled from there. Luckily I don't say random stuff I'm thinking, but I think it's hilarious when people do. Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
“I can’t believe it, Replacement Mummy!” Padfoot hugged her. This really was too much.
Loved the Replacement Mummy.. So Sirius.. He's just.. Uuh.. Hehe..
Loved it.. It's just soo cute !! :D When I saw the banner I thought: A story with that title must be read! Hehe.. It's so cute ! :D
You write very good.. :D
Looking forward to your review, great great story.. So funny, cute and original.. Just great ! :D
9/10 , only because 10 is a difficult thing for me to give.. hehe.. So is 9 actually.. So great job !Author's Response: Thanks for your review! Ooh yes, that definitely seems to be a favorite excerpt from this story, lol. I'm so glad you find the story cute! Because that's all I ever wanted it to be. I will will will get to reviewing your story, but it's midterm season so I'm mad busy. Hopefully over Thanksgiving! Report Review
You have yet to feel the wrath of Team Potter, China,” oh my god. hilarious!!
Actually, that’s my imagination journal,
woah. so it really did belong to his grandfather first!
and just likein we gryffies(amzing story by the way) i like how he plans out his family. even if its a bit said that it'll never happenAuthor's Response: Thanks for reviewing! We Gryffies is kind of the "sequel" to this one shot...the Jameses are kind of the same character. The Imagination Journal, the creepy family-planning thing...at any rate, I'm glad you enjoyed it! Report Review
Aww! I luved it! Sooo funny! I like the bit with the kids names.
slytherin_goddess_24Author's Response: Thanks so much for reviewing! The kids names part is kind of sad, since Lily and James only get around to having Harry. Report Review
aaw loved itAuthor's Response: Thank you so much for your review! Report Review
and the devil padfoot goes "Good on ya mate! at least you got around to snogging her eventually!" and the angel moony goes "see, isn't it better to talk first and then snog her?" and then you go "sod off guys... or i'll have to make a memo to self to kill you along with your real counterparts;." and then... what? the story is finished??? damn...
great story! 10/10Author's Response: I'm sorry it had to end! I only had enough plot for a one-shot! But technically (in my mind, anyway) We Gryffies is the spinoff fic from this one-shot. I'm glad you enjoyed it! Report Review
Uh thats It? I DEMAND MORE! I MADE YOU THE QUEEN AND U GIVE ME NO SEQUEL!!??!!??!! COMEON!!! 10/10Author's Response: We Gryffies is the sequel to this! The character of James is the same, though of course it takes place two generations later. I'm glad you liked it, though! Report Review
ahh i loved it! great jobAuthor's Response: Thank you very much for your review! Report Review
"best thing since sliced bread"
ive been laughing ever since...Author's Response: Ha I worried if that was too much of a cliché, but I'm glad it was humorous! Thank for you your review! Report Review
I laughed when it said their kid will be learning Tagalog. (I'm Filipino ^_^)Author's Response: Thanks for your review! Yeah, a friend of mine's Filipino so I have often been reminded of the distinction between Tagalog and tagalong ;) Report Review
OMFG! This was so funny! I was laughing out loud the entire time, and that Angel Moony and Devil Padfoot thing was just freakin hilarious! 10/10 and this is a new addition to my favorites!Author's Response: Thank you so much for this review (I had a rough day, so it's much appreciated)! You can probably tell that I have a nutty sense of humor, and I'd so glad that people are receptive to it. Report Review
so goodd!! and trully funny
Author's Response: Thanks so much! Report Review
Awww! I loved it! It was well written, had obvious humor and some hidden humor, James was goofy. It was just all around good! Author's Response: Thanks for your review! The whole point of this one shot was just to be stupidly funny, not be a life changing work of literature, and I'm glad you liked it! Report Review
I absolutly LOVED it! it was amazing! I especially liked how right in the middle of kissing her, he thinks of step surfing.Author's Response: Thanks for your review! James in my one-shot is a certifiable nutter butter (yet another Scrubs reference), but I don't think enough people portray him this way. Report Review
I think that your story was witty and amusing. But I think the story, altogether, would have been stronger and easier to read if the words and sentences did not create as much rhythm and shock. For example, when James is daydreaming about his future wedding, he states, “I pretend to go in for a slow, romantic kiss, but then I’m all like, “I’m outtie, suckas!” and I give Lily a big fat kiss on the lips and she’s all, “Oh James!” and Padfoot tosses me my racing broom and we hop on it and fly out of the church or wherever the hell we get married, and all the people back in the church or whatever are like, “Oh snap, this is the sickest wedding I’ve ever been to!” (Paragraph Thirty-Eight). I know that it is important to have your individual voice in the story, but sometimes it is harder for the readers to focus on events when various words or phrases (for instance: “suckas,” “Oh snap!” or “sickest”) rob the story of its evenness.
Also keep in mind that you are writing from James’ point of view. James lives in England, not New York City (Please don’t take that comment the wrong way. I did not mean it in a culturally cruel way).
In conclusion, I would like to add that I did laugh several times.Author's Response: Thank you for your honest review! I'm sorry if the story was in any way difficult to read, but I wanted it to sound like the stream of consciousness of a teenage boy with ADD. I usually don't write run-on sentences like the example, but to try to make the first person perspective more authentic, I wanted to use bad grammar (if that makes any sense). I also recognize that my choice of language was pretty ridiculous, and I tried to make this story as accurate as I could, but I suppose as a New Yorker who came of age in the 2000's, I am inherently going to make linguistic mistakes when assuming the voice of a Briton who came of age in the 1970's. I really, really appreciate your criticisms and will consider them in my future writing, but the only purpose of this one-shot was simple entertainment and I did not write it to be perfect. I'm glad you found it funny, though! That's all I ever really wanted. Report Review
I love it!Author's Response: Thanks for your review! Report Review
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