Reading Reviews for Shadow of a Doubt
  
71 Reviews Found

Review #26, by greatest of 'em all Chapter I - Hurting

5th February 2007:
My grammar's as bad as my two-year-old nephew so I really cant say anything on that but leaving grammar aside I really really like this chapter because it's so true to canon. Morfin is practically very Morfin-ish and so is Marvolo. And poor, poor Merope. I really pity her! The way you've projected her is very good. She is shown as weak and perhaps, submissive but she shouts back at her brother and she does harbor some hope of having Tom Riddle. Really authentic, these emotions. Maybe, Merope's imagining about a life with Tom is sort of an escape route from the harsh reality that she has to face everyday by the name of life. I really, really liked this chapter and am going to read it further!

The fact that you were able to portray so many things about Merope in such short time shows how well-written this fic really is! I really dont need to say more except perhaps an apology for reviewing so late! *apologises*

Author's Response: Ooh, a nice long review! Yay!

I pity her too, dearums, she's just a pathetic little girl that's been shunned her whole entire life...there's nothing really she can do but sit there and watch as everything good just passes by. I'm glad I've got Merope down on the dot, that's what I was hoping for. YAY! Emotions are authentic as well!

Aw, you're making me grin here. Okay so, thanks for the review, no matter how long it has been since I requested. I'm quite pleased that you like it and I look forward to seeing more of your CC come through.


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Review #27, by Healer_25 Chapter VII - Blind Deception

19th January 2007:
.thats such a pitiful end to this chapter...:(

erm...the overall theme I felt with your story is that some chapters are amazing and others I could have skipped, they lacked the emotion and quality that your first couple and this one did.

So that being said my suggestion is that you should read over what happened in those chapters, essentially for each chapter it should be a mini plot, a beginning rise and then either conclusion of the thought or a cliff hanger.

Otherwise you have a lot of potential as a writer, its just really hit an miss, at least for me.

Thanks for writing and keep it up!

Author's Response: Yay for CC! Oh, I love you for suggesting that...I'm taking my chapters to my english teacher now to see if we can work things over with this. =) Thank you thank you!

You really make me smile with this review.


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Review #28, by Healer_25 Chapter VI - Truth Hurts

19th January 2007:
saw that so far...I'm just not getting it, normally I'd probably stop reading now, but I think the thing I'm not getting is how quickly things are moving, maybe if you added descriptions and worked on character personality.

Author's Response: It's hard doing a charrie that canon hasn't explored...so when you make a character your own, you have to be very careful about how you portray them, and yes I agree I think I need to...keep in touch with Merope a bit. Thank you.

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Review #29, by Healer_25 Chapter V - Reality Bug

19th January 2007:
its really odd your beginning was really good, but the stories losing momentum...I'm not quite following everything.

Author's Response: Ah, you win some you lose some, eh? Glad your liking the majority of it!

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Review #30, by Healer_25 Chapter IV - Lust

19th January 2007:
.that was so creepy.er merope was winning in my books and now...ick.

Author's Response: Haha. Creepy? XD I told you she'd become someone you'd love to hate. A main character you're supposed to hate. =)

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Review #31, by Healer_25 Chapter III - Devious Scheming

19th January 2007:
heh offering a drink, I honestly thought it'd be fun to see whats in her vault, as well I would have thought she'd buy a little nicer clothing...I mean what girl doesnt' want clothing?

Author's Response: A girl with an evil agenda doesn't want to concentrate on clothing! =)

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Review #32, by Healer_25 Chapter II - Freedom

19th January 2007:
hehe...I like this so far, freedom.wee! I've felt that way before.

Author's Response: I think at some point in our lives, we all feel this way. Freedom really is a sweet feeling. =) Thanks!

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Review #33, by Healer_25 Chapter I - Hurting

19th January 2007:
aww...you make me pity her.

At the same time I can see how she would live and feel like that.

There were some sentences that could be worded better but other than that it was fine.

Author's Response: Yay! Pity is good, that's what I'm looking for in this chapter...she's one you grow to love to hate.

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Review #34, by ladylish Chapter I - Hurting

17th January 2007:
((Here's a promised review - sorry it's taken me so long *rolls eyes*))

I definitely liked Morfin's character in this - the first line genuinely made me shiver. However, the impression I got from HBP was that Morfin could only speak Parseltongue. Also, personally, I can't see Merope standing up to her brother, and definitely not shouting back to her father (however meek you did portray her as) - she seemed a very weak girl to me, and though she did betray her father to chase after Tom Riddle... I can't see her being as bold as she was here with her brother or her father.

However, it was still a very well written piece, though in places I felt the structure of your sentences was a little stiff - the third paragraph does spring to mind.

Looking forward to reading the rest (at some stage, school permitting)

xxx Liz xxx



Author's Response: It's not a problem with the time. It doesn't bug me at all. =)

Yay! I have Morfin exactly the way I want him....I can't wait to make him appear in the plotline again. Woo!

Well, I guess she was just coming to the point in her life where she was sick of being pushed around. She wanted to have a taste of trying to stand up for herself, and failed miserably.

Hopefully I'll be able to fix my sentences, making them right, and don't worry about the rest, I'm pleased you reviewed anyway! Take your time!

-Gin-


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Review #35, by prongsie_potter_rulez Chapter VII - Blind Deception

14th January 2007:
You are just rolling out the chapters!!!

Whoa... that was... whoa!!

Amazing!! Love the way her fathers rants were entangled with Tom's... brilliant!!!

Very well done!!!

How many more chapters will there be-?

Until New Years - when Voldemort is born?

Hope so :)


xoprongsieox

Author's Response: I hoped that you wouldn't get confused when I did put his rants entangled with Tom's...you know when you get into a certain situation and it makes you flash quickly bad to others? That's what I was trying to do.

Erm, I'm honestly not sure. I know what's going to happen next just as much as you do, this is all coming from my head straight to word pad. I will bring it up through with Tom Riddle is born, and I'll probably stop at Merope's death. So it will show her giving Borgin, at Borgin and Burkes, Slytherin's locket and such.

But I don't know how many chapters that all will fill.

Thanks heaps!

-Gin-


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Review #36, by prongsie_potter_rulez Chapter VI - Truth Hurts

14th January 2007:
ooo!

wonder how Tom will react...

Merope was IC, don't worry!!

Brilliant!!!


xoprongsieox

Author's Response: Hah, I wonder how too! Thanks Prongsie, m'dear. I appreciate it!

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Review #37, by dreamdancer7 Chapter VI - Truth Hurts

13th January 2007:
It's a cliffhanger!! Please update soon! I really love your story! :D

Author's Response: Yes, a cliffhanger. The dreaded, dreaded cliffies that I love to write so much. =) I'm writing chapter seven at this very moment, I dunno when it's going to be done nor what's going to happen. I'm writing this from my head, so I know what's going to happen just as much as you do. Thanks heaps dreamdancer7!

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Review #38, by Liadan Lightflower Chapter V - Reality Bug

8th January 2007:
T.A. I was made one to! *jumps in glee*. Updates will come soon? I hope. This was great. What is she getting herself into...she will stop because she really loves Tom...I know. Please make her eyes go straight. How riduclous does that sound? lol Awesome!

Liadan Lightflower

Author's Response: Updates come soon, as soon as we're done disecting fetal pigs in Biology and I finish my exams and reports. =]

Eventually, she'll stop...I'm planning that next bit and *motions to rating* that's why the rating is so high.

Eyes. Go. Straight? Nah. Don't think so. It suits her. And her...oddness.

-Gin-


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Review #39, by Liadan Lightflower Chapter IV - Lust

8th January 2007:
One thing in the beginning that I pointed out was 'into acting' when you meant 'action'. Wow! She is inbred isn't she...how horrible?She is a devil isn't she. Once again, your descriptions are amazing. I have a very big smile right now and this plan...devious. Phenomenal!!!

10/10

Liadan Lightflower

Author's Response: Once again, thanks for pointing that out. =]

-laughs- Yes. She is an inbred to the core. Devil too, infernal *uses her new vocabulary word from english* Tankee Tankee.

-Gin=


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Review #40, by Liadan Lightflower Chapter III - Devious Scheming

8th January 2007:
This is cleverly thought up. I like Merope...she is completely carless and oblivious to what will happen when she gives Tom the potion. 'And with that and a hrumph, the lady was off, the baby sucking it's thumb.' The baby and thumb made me laugh for some reason.This chapter was well-written and there are no objections on my part, except for the fact that other people are missing out on a great story. = )

10/10

Liadan Lightflower



Author's Response: Why gracias! I like Merope too, but soon she'll become the main character that you'll love to hate. I've got...- erm, she's got some nasty tricks up her little tattered sleeves.

Haha, I'm glad I made you laugh! -shrugs-

Aw *cookies* muchos gracias!

-Gin-


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Review #41, by Liadan Lightflower Chapter II - Freedom

8th January 2007:
The one mistake that I saw in both the first and second chapter is that you used 'gawping' and it should be 'gawking'. Other than that I give you two thumbs up for this chapter. I have to say that I am very intrigued by this story and I love it to death. I have put it under my faves.

Merope is a scheming little one isn't she? She does live with the worst people, so she does have an excuse. I really love your descriptive writing style and it flows well making it a very enjoyable read. Great job hun!

10/10

Liadan Lightflower

Author's Response: Eek! *goes to fix immediately!* Thank so much for catching that. =]

Yay! Two thumbs up! *adds her own to the mix* Wow, favs. That's....wow....you've made me speechless.

....
....
....

Okay maybe not, but still. =] Close enough. Ahem, yes, she's a scheming, devious little infernal girl...but she's been deprived, so she's power hungry and driven once she gets the sip of freedom, she wants more. Thanks muchos, amiga!

-Gin-


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Review #42, by Liadan Lightflower Chapter I - Hurting

8th January 2007:
I believe I actually read this before when I first started reading hpff back in July.I wasn't accustomed to leaving reviews, but I know for a fact that I read this. I have to hand it to you, you really know how to tell a story and Merope's emotions were awesome. Does she use a spell or potion...I know I remember something like that from happening? This chappie was very well written and I loved the description. That rhymes doesn't it? You don't how happy this chapter makes me. I really enjoyed it. Now off to the next chapter. Great job hun!

10/10

Liadan Lightflower

Author's Response: =]

I honestly, really, really appreciate all the reviews I get on this story. It, like my James/Lily chaptered fic, has really brought out the best in me for a first-timer at this era and genre. And I'm truly proud of it. She uses a potion, by the way. =] Hahahah, yes it does rhyme...I think. *rereads it* Uh, huh. It does.

Thanks so much Liadan Lightflower!


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Review #43, by prongsie_potter_rulez Chapter V - Reality Bug

4th January 2007:
Trusted Author Status?!

That means you can update... whenever!!!

*opns bubbily*

YAAAY!

10/10 XD



Author's Response: *returns bubbilyness*

w00tness!

Thanks Prongsie!


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Review #44, by dreamdancer7 Chapter V - Reality Bug

4th January 2007:
Great job! I really love this story. It's very well-written and your describing of her emotions is great! Keep up the great work! :D

Author's Response: Yay!

Glad you think her emotions and character is still in check. I'll be getting the next chapter up ASAP. =]

-Gin-


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Review #45, by Potterholic Chapter IV - Lust

26th November 2006:
Wow, she did it! I mean, we all know she did it, but I like the way she talked Tom into drinking it. Brilliant chapter again! I can’t wait to see where the relationship is going. Update soon!

Author's Response: Of course she did it, silly! -pfft- =] Smooth talkin's the way to go for a girl like her. I can't wait to see where I'm going to take it too! I'll try and get the next one up soon! YAY for trusted author status!

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Review #46, by Potterholic Chapter III - Devious Scheming

22nd November 2006:
Great chapter again! You got Merope’s character down pat, and the way she liked bossing people around was believable, and also the way she was afraid to turn into her brother and father. I also like how Morfin was the one who gave Merope the idea of giving the potion to Tom. How ironic, especially because Morfin said that to taunt Merope. ^_^ Keep up the good work!

Author's Response: -bows- I've worked my arse off to get her character down. I didn't want to make her too demanding, or too soft. She comes from a harsh background so it's difficult to portray that. ^_^ Thanks heaps!

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Review #47, by Potterholic Chapter II - Freedom

22nd November 2006:
Great chapter, Gin! I like how you portray Merope, and your description is really good too. You conveyed the emotions well and I like how Merope got her chance with Morfin and Marvolo gone. There were some typos, but nothing big. I can’t wait to read what’s going to happen next, so onto the next chapter!

Author's Response: Wow!! YAY! Thanks so much. I wanted it to be emotional so all her emotions were conveyed to the reader. It was my main goal for the first chapter, to drag readers in by an emotional connection. Yeah, typos. Can't live with em, can't live without em! Thanks so much!
-Gin-


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Review #48, by Breakaway615 Chapter IV - Lust

14th November 2006:
Ooh, I like the ending here. Very good. This was a very good chapter. Not too short, not too long. A bit slower, which is good. Great job! Can't wait for more!

-Liz

Author's Response: Yes! I'll call this the perfect chapter, seeing as this is the one I like the most (other than the first one) Thank you so much! Chapter five is on it's way!

-Ginni-


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Review #49, by Breakaway615 Chapter III - Devious Scheming

14th November 2006:
I think this is moving a little fast. It's quick, and it's rushed, but it's still good. I like it a lot. I didn't really notice any mistakes, so that's really good!

Good job, but I'll read the next chapter!

-Liz

Author's Response: I'll see if I can tweak it to maybe make it go slower. The reason why I wanted it to go quick is because there wasn't much happening between getting ingredients and so on. Thanks heaps!

-Ginni-


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Review #50, by Breakaway615 Chapter II - Freedom

14th November 2006:
A little short, but I like it. It's good, and I did not see any mistakes. I think it's a very interesting story, but in a good way, so do not worry!

I will move on to the next chapter. Excellent job so far!

-Liz

Author's Response: *cookies* Thanks so much! It's short because...erm...well...I'm not sure why it's short. But it is!

-Ginni-


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