Reading Reviews for Risen: Out of the Ashes
  
97 Reviews Found

Review #26, by HPFAN Party

10th June 2014:
This chapter is a great way to show just how well James and Charlotte go together. From the costume choices to the fact that Charlotte allows herself to sing so James can hear. All the signs are leading to their relationship and I think you placed those signs perfectly. Great chapter as always

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Review #27, by Lena Twenty Questions Part Deux

9th June 2014:
Can I just say that in a story I might be writing I have a
character with dark brown curly hair and grey eyes and her
best friend has a barn owl named Athena? I'm LOVING the
story so far- just the right balance of tradgety, romance and
comidy for me.

Author's Response: Yay! Glad you like the story so far. Hope you continue to enjoy it. Nothing wrong with dark brown curly hair, gray eyes, and owls named Athena. :D

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Review #28, by Terra Falling Uphill

7th June 2014:
What about chapter 21?

Author's Response: Chapter 21(Party) is still in the queue waiting to be validated. Anything after this chapter (Falling Uphill) is either waiting to be validated, or old story.

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Review #29, by - Trapped in a Maze

5th June 2014:
Loving the story so far I'm glad I came back to it and found so many new chapters. Just wondering are we missing a chapter before this one?

Author's Response: Huh... odd. Yes, there is a chapter before this one. Trapped in a Maze was an old chapter... I changed the name and edited some things. You might have read the old version. The chapter before this... that will make everything make sense again is called Party, and should be up in a day or two. Sorry! Hope that didn't mess you up too much, don't know how or why that happened.
I'm glad you like the story! Thanks so so much for reading it and for reviewing. :)


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Review #30, by Mizikal Falling Uphill

5th June 2014:
Love love love the story! I didn't read the original write up so I've only read what's edited. Any chance you could put the date instead of just the month on your AN's? (Like June 4th 2014 instead of just June 2014) I read a bit ahead by accident and I know I can't be trusted not to do it again. :-X

Anyway, again I'm really loving the story as edited. Really digging the James/Char dynamic. Can't wait to read more.

Author's Response: Hi! I'm so happy to hear that you love the story. Makes my day.

Yes, I can start including the date. :)

There should be at least two updated chapters to read within a week... I hope. :)


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Review #31, by HPFAN Falling Uphill

4th June 2014:
That was fantastic. The drama, the dialogue, the inner turmoil charlotte is facing all leading up to the major decision. I love the development of all the supporting characters so far, they are all playing their roles perfectly. The dynamic between Ava, Harper, and Charlotte is far more dramatic and telling of future events. Dom has something going on and I feel like she is trying her hardest to not burden Charlotte with anything more in her life. I am almost starting to feel bad for Asher because he is just a sweet guy who thinks he's doing right by his girl, but he has to start wising up and realizing the parallel between Charlotte and James' ornery dispositions. As always I thank you for your writing and I look forward to the next installments of this fantastic story.

P.S.
"maybe you walk you to where you need to go" too many "you's"?

Author's Response: There I go again... writing and reading too fast to pick up on mistakes. Oops! I'll go fix that. Thanks for pointing it out.

Yay! Glad you liked it. That and all the other stuff. Up next is all the Halloween stuff and then some brand spanking new chapters that really up the drama. :D


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Review #32, by Hannah A Rush of Anger, A Trip to the Hospital Wing, and A Good Memory

2nd June 2014:
Madame Pomfrey was the previous matron, not Madame Pince. Madame Pince was the librarian. Wonderful story by the way!

Author's Response: Yea... I don't know how I messed up on that one. Thanks for letting me know. It will be changed as soon as I get to that chapter in the editing process.

Thanks for reading! :)


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Review #33, by HPFAN Secrets and Lies

1st June 2014:
I think that was a perfect amount of intensity for the story. I really feel the breaking point coming between Charlotte and James. Something needs to happen between those two and soon or i feel I may go insane. Rose is playing a dangerous game as well, doesn't she know how easily things are found out in Hogwarts? The walls have ears, and eyes, and talk. Once again James needs to get hit with a beaters bat. All in all it was yet another fantastic chapter. Something about this one in particular was so easy to read. Your work is always good and flows like water but I feel like this was one of your best. Don't know why, just how I feel. As always thank you for writing and I shall be waiting with bated breath for the next chapter.

Author's Response: Oh it's going to get a lot more intense. Mwahahaha. I'm really glad you liked this chapter though and I sincerely hope you enjoy the next one (which is in the queue and should be up in the next few days). After that Halloween and then some more new stuff. :)
Thanks so much for the nice words, as always, but it's especially nice to hear the chapters I think are the craziest are the favorites. :) Hope you're doing well.


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Review #34, by HPFAN Regret

30th May 2014:
This is a combo review for this and the previous chapter since I realized they were both new. I tell you, even knowing what happens in the story I still look forward to everything you write. This is like the ultimate "It's the journey not the destination" thing right now for me. Unless you plan on changing the ending and everything. In which case. Yaa new destination!. Sorry this is kinda rambling. I'm liking the quidditch mention, I feel like since James and Asher are on the same team it would be quite difficult for them to play together when one has such animosity towards the other. I like that Charlotte is standing up for herself even when she knows that she isn't as happy as she could be. James, well, I kind of want to hit him in the head with a beaters bat. Knock some sense in there. Anyways. Look forward to everything you write and as always thank you for your work.

Author's Response: I'm so thrilled you're liking all the new stuff. I'm pretty sure the ending is going to remain the same... but who knows. ;)

Even as the writer, I too want to hit James with a beaters bat! Just wait til you see what's next... all the new juicy stuff I'm writing. I sincerely hope you keep enjoying it, as you seem to be with all the other changes so far. :D



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Review #35, by Lottie Epilogue

29th May 2014:
:'( Goodbye James and Lottie.

Author's Response: I know. :( All stories have to end sometime. I hope you'll come back and read the story again once all the edits are done. Thanks from the bottom of my heart for reading this. I do hope you enjoyed it. :)

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Review #36, by Lottie A Rush of Anger, A Trip to the Hospital Wing, and A Good Memory

29th May 2014:
It's Madame Pompfrey not Madame Pince! She was the librarian!

Author's Response: I don't know how I messed up on that. Thanks for letting me know! I'm going through and doing some pretty big edits on the story, so when I get there I'll correct that. Oops!

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Review #37, by LOTTIE :D A Return to Hogwarts, A Blossoming and A Break

29th May 2014:
I BLOODY HATE VIOLET AND BELLE! WHY DID THEY HAVE TO RUIN EVERYTHING WHEN ITNWAS GOING SO WELL. AND GOD, I WISH LOTTIE(MY NAME :D)WOULD REALISE HOW AMAZING SHE IS!

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Review #38, by kayleefrank Rage Monster

28th May 2014:
I like Asher but not with Charlotte. Why is James being such an idiot? I know he'll man up eventually but... he's an idiot lol.

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Review #39, by HPFAN A Date with A Gryffindor

27th May 2014:
Always good to see new work from you,. I'm glad to hear that your settling back down and things are clearing up, One of those life events would be enough to derail most, all 3 combined, thats the trifecta of B.S. Just know you have a support system here whenever you need. Now, the chapter itself was, as always fantastic. Asher and Charlottes seem like such a good couple on paper, yet the heart wants what the heart wants. Thats the reason Charlotte is always thinking of James. I have been looking forward to the party scene for a while now and with the way James has been acting I really can't wait to see how it turns out. I flew through the original version of this story so fast and so long ago that, while I remember major events that occur in the story, I forget the dynamic that occurred between character so its almost like reading a brand new story. I Hope that Dom and Gia continue to be bigger parts in the story. The way you have written their characters makes them strong enough to more than just support and I would love to read deeper into their characters. As always, thank you for your writing and I look forward to the next installment.

Author's Response: Haha... yea... life has been a bit uh... challenging lately. to put it mildly. I'm actually pretty happy about some of it though, life changes and we're supposed to change with it. Thanks for the kind words. :)

The party scene will now be a few more chapters away, because I'm adding in some new material. Don't hate me.

I actually keep forgetting about Georgia! Gah. It's horrible. I often add things in based off suggestions from people like you that review often, so I might have to keep working on their characters. In fact... I have an idea as I'm writing this. Thank Merlin (as they say)... inspiration is returning. :D



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Review #40, by AIP Alexander Rage Monster

17th May 2014:
Hey! Just a few quick side notes: A couple chapters ago (maybe 3), you had James walk the mile down to her house at three a.m. to kiss her and tell her he liked her. The next two chapters, he actually admitted it, and spent the whole train ride stealing quick glances of her. So, and this part has me baffled, this chapter you state that he almost kissed her (right after he left the hall), and have him question his feelings for her, when he had already accepted his feelings towards her in the last chapters, stating he liked her, but feeling like he still didn't deserve her. He also told Charlie directly that he didn't fancy her. So, my question is whether or not you forgot to edit this part of the chapter, or you left it in like this deliberately.
On the other hand, reintroducing Asher into the story juices it up a bit [even though it REALLY tears my heart apart (like putting it into a blender)]. I hope you keep the part about the charm James puts in the Halloween party where he makes Charlotte's hair turn gold if she thinks about him. I also really enjoyed Dom's involvement in the chapter even though at times I really wanted to smack her gob shut, but that's a good thing as i draws us closer to the story. Oh yea, and when did James find out about Scorose, did he see them sometime in the past or is he really close to her, enough for her to open up to him about something so personal and obviously impacting knowing who he is. It be nice to see the relation he has with some of his other cousins.
Other than that I'm really enjoying the story so far! Keep posting and don't torture us so much, we feel James's pain as much as he does!
Ps. I really hate Asher right now, he had his chance and took way too long to take his move (4 years!). Everyone clearly knew James was smitten and was slowly making progress (so in other words he had called dibs, and a true bro does't steal another bro's girl). So It would be interesting to see a James vs. Asher conflict that might strain their friendship for a while since everyone could see Charlotte also fancied James just as bad as he did her. So, to make it short:. NOT COOL ASHER!

Until next time!
AIP Alexander

Author's Response: Hi hi!

I have plans for all of that... just slowly working everything in. :) I will be writing the bit about Rose in a future new chapter, and add in some conflict with Asher as well to keep it interesting, and believable. Because, let's admit it, if you were in love with someone, you wouldn't handle it very well if they were with someone else. Especially a friend.

Regarding the part where James is being very confusing to the readers, and not fully owning his feelings and doing something about it... I made that deliberate. I myself have been in a situation very similar, where a guy admitted he really liked me, and then didn't do anything about it, even though it was obvious to everyone around us that we should. Hope that's not too personal, but we tend to write what we know. Only this story has a different ending than mine.

I"m so so so glad you're enjoying the edits. Makes my day. I hope to keep updating regularly, but my life got turned upside down recently and it's been incredibly hard to focus on writing. I plan on editing the next chapter tomorrow, so hopefully that will be up soon.

Please keep the honest (and nice) thoughts coming. Helps me to be a better writer. I really do appreciate it. :)



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Review #41, by HPFAN Rage Monster

17th May 2014:
Always good to read another chapter in this story. The edits are going great, as I'm sure you already know. I really enjoy how much the other members of the family are in this chapter, they are always good for a laugh to two. I look forward to seeing how you everything play out for James, Charlotte and the rest of the gang. Thank you again for your writing and as always I look forward to your next chapter

Author's Response: Hiya!

thanks as always for the review. I'm sorry that i've been a bit slow in updating. My whole life got flipped upside down and I had to move back home, and then on top of that, for the past three days there's been a wildfire burning less than three miles from my house- so needless to say, I haven't gotten much wiring done. I will be picking it up again tomorrow.



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Review #42, by HPFAN Can't Fight This Feeling Anymore

13th May 2014:
GREAT chapter as always. I loved the interactions between all the characters. Your dialogue writing is superb, always has been and this was a great way to introduce Avery, the creepy creep that he is. You can almost feel the tension between Charlotte and James, its near palpable. And now with Asher back in the mix... I really look forward to the upcoming chapters, and to see when James comes to his senses. As always thank you for writing and I look forward to the next update/chapter.

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Review #43, by HPFAN Train Ride

12th May 2014:
This was a good chapter to basically wrap everything that had happened up, which I feel worked out well because of all the hard work and new chapters/ editing you have been doing. It was good to see some of the other characters introduced as well. Harper has also become a nice supporting role and I feel like you could use both her and Ava more not that your have introduced and described them more accurately. As always thank you for the writing and for this story. Hope your real life has calmed down or become a bit less crazy, its never fun to have consistent craziness.

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Review #44, by Jared Johnson Introduction

11th May 2014:
I really like this story

Author's Response: Thank you so much! :)
Hope you enjoy the rest of it as well. :)


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Review #45, by HPFAN Summer's End

7th May 2014:
It's fun to picture James just zoning out at the kitchen table while trying to figure out his current situation. I feel like its a moment everyone has had. Al, once again, seems to be good rock for James to lean on, which is funny seeing that he doesn't follow his own advice, but it is always easier to speak than to act. Ava... well isn't she just a peach? The worst part is everyone knows someone like that, someone who is so focused on their own lives that they convince themselves their opinions are facts. These past chapters have been such a joy to read/re-read and I couldn't be more excited to see what you have in store. Also I just wanted to say that at the time of me writing this your story is in the top 10!. So congratulations. I never really check that because its usually the same stories but lo and behold a mis-click and there you are. Anyways. Thank you again for the story and your writing, looking forward to your future chapters.

P.S.
"relieved" meant to be "relive"? If not my bad. Also
"sitting her on my own?" meant to be "here"? I Hope I am not annoying you with this, its not my intent. From one fast typer to another I completely understand the troubles.

Author's Response: Wait... Top 10? I didn't even know that existed! That makes me so happy and is a desperately needed piece of good news.

I'm so stoked that you're enjoying the new stuff. Hoping I can keep up with the fast updates through my crazy life right now. Fortunately, writing is the best escape.

Grr... I really need to slow down when I'm checking for spelling. I type and read really, really fast and my brain skips over spelling mistakes because the word looks similar enough. I'll be going back and changing that. Thanks for letting me know. lol.

As always- thanks so much for the review.


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Review #46, by Kerstinester A Family Reunion

5th May 2014:
I just found this story and I absolutely love it! I love the way the characters work together and how you imagine them. You are a really good writer. This is a story you just want more and more of! There are some spelling faults. But I'm from Sweden is I really shouldn't say anything haha. Anyway tanck you for this story and letting me escape my world and become a part of this one instead once in a while.

Author's Response: Gah! I'm so happy you like the story. Reviews make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, and I want to extend my sincerest appreciation that you took the time to say some nice things.

I type really, really fast, and I often mis-spell things and then I read so fast, I miss them when I'm editing. :/ Oops!

I caution you to only read up to what is new or edited (and I make notes of that in each chapter that is either new or edited.)... otherwise the story is about to get real confusing.

I hope you keep reading and love what the story will be when it's all nice and finished. :)


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Review #47, by HPFAN Seventeen

4th May 2014:
Just realized I signed my name HP instead of HPFAN, sorry bout that

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Review #48, by HP Seventeen

4th May 2014:
This was an interesting chapter. Dom's character provided a good source of outside opinions. James seems to be dealing with his emotions the way any teenage boy does, poorly. Its so interesting to have read the original story and to see how you are changing it, its still your amazing writing and the same core story, but you are doing such an amazing job with this re-write. I cant wait until they get back to Hogwarts and all the other characters get involved. I was also thinking about how interesting it would be to read an action scene like an in-depth quidditch match with James with your writing style, I think it would be great. Anyways, thanks again for the chapter and the writing, I look forward the future chapters.

Author's Response: Hi again. I am definitely considering a Quidditch scene... but it hasn't come to me yet... so we will see. I do have a practice session coming up once they get back to school, hopefully you'll enjoy that little bit.

I have to finish doing a major re-write of the chapter where everyone heads to Kings Cross and returns to school... it's a bit difficult. That and my life too has been insane lately, so it's been a little hard to concentrate on writing.

Your reviews, as always, make my day. :)


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Review #49, by AIP Alexander Seventeen

4th May 2014:
So... i haven't actually read this chapter yet (nor have read Waffle man), but i kind of skimmed through them. I've loved what you've done with the chapters so far, the story has become much, much better, but i just have one concern. By making James kiss Lottie in this chapter i don't know if you've noticed but you've dug yourself into a temporary hole (at least until you edit the other chapters), because if i'm not mistaken James's family bothers him for having a crush on her in the second chapter after they arrive at school, but he denies any romantic feelings towards her when she confronts him about it. Don't get me wrong, i like the story 10x more this way, but unless you portray James as the biggest jerk in history (which i would kill you for), there is a slim chance for the Charlotte-Asher relationship to happen. This chapter adds a lot of possible outcomes and passages for your story to unfold into (e.g. how James will change once he's in school and how others treat him because of it / Dom's approval or dislike of their relationship, thinking he's playing her... the possibilities are endless). Regarding your request in the answer of one of my reviews to look for details left hanging, or chapters that could have had more detail in them, I'll gladly do it, but I'm in kind of a pinch lately, so i'll reread your story as soon as i have the chance.
Cheers!
AIP Alexander

Author's Response: Hi hi!

Thanks for sending in some thoughts. I do have a plan for how to make things work after adding in the sudden kiss. I feel like I've made it pretty obvious in the authors notes that I'm doing major editing and that anything that doesn't say new or edited is old. I'm trying to work quickly!

And no worries about other thoughts- we all have lives of our own. Get to it when you can- and only if you want to. Your review was more direct than others, which I appreciate, so that's why I was asking.

Hope you had a great day!

Thanks
-Laura


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Review #50, by HPFAN Waffle Man

4th May 2014:
Yet another great chapter. Sorry it took so long for me to review this, my life has been insane as of late. I've been looking forward to reading this chapter since it was posted. As for the chapter itself I really like how James is developing and how his maturation is taking place. He knows that he found someone who he truly appreciates and he needs to be the person that she deserves. Yet his waiting may cause her to feel put out and unwanted, o the drama that is young love. I cant wait to see what happens when, as you put it, the two worlds collide. This is a shorter review because I am about to read the next chapter. Thank you again for you writing and your work.

Author's Response: I get insane life, a little too well. Hope things calm down for you soon.

Anyway- thank you as always for the reviews. I've said it before- but it's been a lot of fun flushing this story out and making it better. :)


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