Reading Reviews for Risen: Out of the Ashes
104 Reviews Found

Review #26, by M Boys will be Boys

17th June 2014:
Ah yes, Quidditch!! There's nothing like it to get the testosterone rampaging and emotions spilling over.

A really good chapter. It's different to your previous chapters; there's more emphasis on the plot whereas in the other chapters, there's more focus on characterisation. I guess it was a good way to set up the christmas section of the storyline. Can't wait to see what happens i.e. how James manages to muck things up.

Also a special mention to Lily in this chapter. Such a spitfire!

So overall great chapter and I'm waiting impatiently for the next one!

Author's Response: So glad you like it! :D

Thanks so so much for the review. Very much appreciated. The next chapter should be up soon! :)

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Review #27, by HPFAN Boys will be Boys

16th June 2014:
Ahh quidditch!!! I loved it. That was so good. James getting some sense knocked into him, Charlotte being torn, and Lily is always amazing. I do feel bad for Charlotte in a way because she really only wants simplicity and her life is the antithesis of that. I stand by that this is an extremely character driven story yet it is great to read your action writing, especially in such a pivotal moment in the protagonists character arch. I love everything about this and I also learned how long it takes for your stories to post once you put them in the queue so thats always good to know. Thank you again for the writing and this story and I cannot wait to see how James manages to mess up being with Charlotte for a whole 2 weeks.

Author's Response: Glad you liked it! :D things are coming together quite nicely, I think.

It does sometimes take a while for new chapters to get posted, and other days it takes a few hours. The next chapter is in the queue now, but might not show up for a few days.

Hope you keep enjoying what's next. I'm probably going to be posting a new chapter to Arise, the sequel and possibly the intro and first chapter to my other new fanfic (Puzzle Pieces) soon as well... so keep an eye out for those.

Hope you're doing well and as always, thanks so much for the review. :)

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Review #28, by HPFAN Confession

11th June 2014:
First of all poor Dom. I had an inkling that is what happened to her but you almost never want to be right about those things. That situation is so hard for people to understand because there is the stigma around teen pregnancies but the body had its own agenda. No matter how against it you are your body will act on its own accord to prepare for birth. It's good to see the three girls bond the way they did and for Charlotte to focus on someone besides James. As for the man himself it seems like he is finally getting it through his head how he should be acting towards Charlotte even if she is still with Asher. Poor, poor Asher. Not helping much to disprove the "nice guys finish last" saying. Its not his fault though, the heart wants what the heart wants. As always thank you for the writing and the story. Absolutely fantastic. Can't wait for the next chapter. Also a special thank you because "maelstrom" is my favorite word and I love seeing it used.

Author's Response: Hi hi!

Maelstrom is a great word... I should use it more often! lol.

I've known a few people who have miscarried, and it's always devastating. It happens to teens too, even though people don't like to talk about it. It seemed like the right thing to do with Dom's character and I'll have to keep building that into her story arc.

As for the two boys in Charlotte's life... I hope I'm right in guessing that you'll enjoy the next two chapters. When I wrote this story the first time, Asher wasn't in it enough for me to feel attached to him, now I kind of do.

As always- thanks a million for the review. I love reading them. Makes me all happy inside.

Hope you are doing well, and have a fantastic rest of your day. :)

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Review #29, by M Confession

11th June 2014:
Hi there!

I stumbled across your story a week ago and I've fallen in love with it. So I'm all caught up with the story and it's about time I gave a review of it.

It's a beautifully written story with a really compelling plot to it. I like the love triangle you've created. It's a good way of showing the great potential of Charlotte and James' relationship. I do feel bad for Asher though. He's such a sweetheart, but not the right person for Charlotte.

Also poor Dom! Such emotional trauma for such a young person. I intrigued about how that's going to play out.

Love your work and I can't wait to see the next chapters.

Author's Response: Hi!

Thank you so so much for the review. It means a great deal to me. :)

I'm thrilled you're enjoying the story so far, and I truly hope you enjoy what's coming next. Next chapter should be up soon, and I have the next few ready to go after that.

Have a fantastic day (or night- depending on where you are) and thanks again for the review!

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Review #30, by Ciara Beginning of the End

11th June 2014:
This is so amazing. I don't even know you and yet I love you for writing this. It has everything; romance, drama, correct punctuation, I love it! In a perfect world, it would be complete already, but who am I to judge? It takes an extraordinary amount of courage to share your ideas with complete strangers, yet you do it so well! Please keep going, and if you publish a novel, I would absolutely love to read it. Sincerely, Adoring Fan.

Author's Response: First... thank you so much for taking the time to write a review. Means the world to me.

Second... your review is making me tear up. sniff sniff. It's kind words like yours that keep me writing, because it makes it feel worthwhile.

I hope to have the story completed in the next few months, and then I'll be going back to work on the sequel and another new fanfic.

I will try and let everyone know when my novel is published, for those, like you, that seem interested.

Once again, thank you so much for the amazing and kind words. Made my day! You're the best. :D

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Review #31, by HPFAN Beginning of the End

10th June 2014:
Ahhh what a great chapter. A nice set up for some quality James and Charlotte time that I am pretty sure James will somehow ruin. I am also very interested in what is going on with Dom. Poor Asher, he tries and tries, but he always ends up with the short end of the stick. Anyways as I have said I love the story, great chapter as always and Thank You for your writing, this story really does make my day better.

Author's Response: Glad you like everything! :D The next chapter (that should be up in a day, I think) explains what's going on with Dom. Hope you enjoy that...

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Review #32, by HPFAN Trapped in a Maze

10th June 2014:
Yet another fantastic chapter. You just keep showing how even if someone is perfect from an outside perspective, if there is no spark or mutual understanding, than it will just not work. Poor Charlotte knows this and the pain of leading someone on is only exacerbating her problems. I really cannot wait to see the other changes you make to this story. Each one is a delight.

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Review #33, by HPFAN Party

10th June 2014:
This chapter is a great way to show just how well James and Charlotte go together. From the costume choices to the fact that Charlotte allows herself to sing so James can hear. All the signs are leading to their relationship and I think you placed those signs perfectly. Great chapter as always

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Review #34, by Lena Twenty Questions Part Deux

9th June 2014:
Can I just say that in a story I might be writing I have a
character with dark brown curly hair and grey eyes and her
best friend has a barn owl named Athena? I'm LOVING the
story so far- just the right balance of tradgety, romance and
comidy for me.

Author's Response: Yay! Glad you like the story so far. Hope you continue to enjoy it. Nothing wrong with dark brown curly hair, gray eyes, and owls named Athena. :D

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Review #35, by Terra Falling Uphill

7th June 2014:
What about chapter 21?

Author's Response: Chapter 21(Party) is still in the queue waiting to be validated. Anything after this chapter (Falling Uphill) is either waiting to be validated, or old story.

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Review #36, by - Trapped in a Maze

5th June 2014:
Loving the story so far I'm glad I came back to it and found so many new chapters. Just wondering are we missing a chapter before this one?

Author's Response: Huh... odd. Yes, there is a chapter before this one. Trapped in a Maze was an old chapter... I changed the name and edited some things. You might have read the old version. The chapter before this... that will make everything make sense again is called Party, and should be up in a day or two. Sorry! Hope that didn't mess you up too much, don't know how or why that happened.
I'm glad you like the story! Thanks so so much for reading it and for reviewing. :)

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Review #37, by Mizikal Falling Uphill

5th June 2014:
Love love love the story! I didn't read the original write up so I've only read what's edited. Any chance you could put the date instead of just the month on your AN's? (Like June 4th 2014 instead of just June 2014) I read a bit ahead by accident and I know I can't be trusted not to do it again. :-X

Anyway, again I'm really loving the story as edited. Really digging the James/Char dynamic. Can't wait to read more.

Author's Response: Hi! I'm so happy to hear that you love the story. Makes my day.

Yes, I can start including the date. :)

There should be at least two updated chapters to read within a week... I hope. :)

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Review #38, by HPFAN Falling Uphill

4th June 2014:
That was fantastic. The drama, the dialogue, the inner turmoil charlotte is facing all leading up to the major decision. I love the development of all the supporting characters so far, they are all playing their roles perfectly. The dynamic between Ava, Harper, and Charlotte is far more dramatic and telling of future events. Dom has something going on and I feel like she is trying her hardest to not burden Charlotte with anything more in her life. I am almost starting to feel bad for Asher because he is just a sweet guy who thinks he's doing right by his girl, but he has to start wising up and realizing the parallel between Charlotte and James' ornery dispositions. As always I thank you for your writing and I look forward to the next installments of this fantastic story.

"maybe you walk you to where you need to go" too many "you's"?

Author's Response: There I go again... writing and reading too fast to pick up on mistakes. Oops! I'll go fix that. Thanks for pointing it out.

Yay! Glad you liked it. That and all the other stuff. Up next is all the Halloween stuff and then some brand spanking new chapters that really up the drama. :D

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Review #39, by Hannah A Rush of Anger, A Trip to the Hospital Wing, and A Good Memory

2nd June 2014:
Madame Pomfrey was the previous matron, not Madame Pince. Madame Pince was the librarian. Wonderful story by the way!

Author's Response: Yea... I don't know how I messed up on that one. Thanks for letting me know. It will be changed as soon as I get to that chapter in the editing process.

Thanks for reading! :)

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Review #40, by HPFAN Secrets and Lies

1st June 2014:
I think that was a perfect amount of intensity for the story. I really feel the breaking point coming between Charlotte and James. Something needs to happen between those two and soon or i feel I may go insane. Rose is playing a dangerous game as well, doesn't she know how easily things are found out in Hogwarts? The walls have ears, and eyes, and talk. Once again James needs to get hit with a beaters bat. All in all it was yet another fantastic chapter. Something about this one in particular was so easy to read. Your work is always good and flows like water but I feel like this was one of your best. Don't know why, just how I feel. As always thank you for writing and I shall be waiting with bated breath for the next chapter.

Author's Response: Oh it's going to get a lot more intense. Mwahahaha. I'm really glad you liked this chapter though and I sincerely hope you enjoy the next one (which is in the queue and should be up in the next few days). After that Halloween and then some more new stuff. :)
Thanks so much for the nice words, as always, but it's especially nice to hear the chapters I think are the craziest are the favorites. :) Hope you're doing well.

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Review #41, by HPFAN Regret

30th May 2014:
This is a combo review for this and the previous chapter since I realized they were both new. I tell you, even knowing what happens in the story I still look forward to everything you write. This is like the ultimate "It's the journey not the destination" thing right now for me. Unless you plan on changing the ending and everything. In which case. Yaa new destination!. Sorry this is kinda rambling. I'm liking the quidditch mention, I feel like since James and Asher are on the same team it would be quite difficult for them to play together when one has such animosity towards the other. I like that Charlotte is standing up for herself even when she knows that she isn't as happy as she could be. James, well, I kind of want to hit him in the head with a beaters bat. Knock some sense in there. Anyways. Look forward to everything you write and as always thank you for your work.

Author's Response: I'm so thrilled you're liking all the new stuff. I'm pretty sure the ending is going to remain the same... but who knows. ;)

Even as the writer, I too want to hit James with a beaters bat! Just wait til you see what's next... all the new juicy stuff I'm writing. I sincerely hope you keep enjoying it, as you seem to be with all the other changes so far. :D

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Review #42, by Lottie Epilogue

29th May 2014:
:'( Goodbye James and Lottie.

Author's Response: I know. :( All stories have to end sometime. I hope you'll come back and read the story again once all the edits are done. Thanks from the bottom of my heart for reading this. I do hope you enjoyed it. :)

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Review #43, by Lottie A Rush of Anger, A Trip to the Hospital Wing, and A Good Memory

29th May 2014:
It's Madame Pompfrey not Madame Pince! She was the librarian!

Author's Response: I don't know how I messed up on that. Thanks for letting me know! I'm going through and doing some pretty big edits on the story, so when I get there I'll correct that. Oops!

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Review #44, by LOTTIE :D A Return to Hogwarts, A Blossoming and A Break

29th May 2014:

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Review #45, by kayleefrank Rage Monster

28th May 2014:
I like Asher but not with Charlotte. Why is James being such an idiot? I know he'll man up eventually but... he's an idiot lol.

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Review #46, by HPFAN A Date with A Gryffindor

27th May 2014:
Always good to see new work from you,. I'm glad to hear that your settling back down and things are clearing up, One of those life events would be enough to derail most, all 3 combined, thats the trifecta of B.S. Just know you have a support system here whenever you need. Now, the chapter itself was, as always fantastic. Asher and Charlottes seem like such a good couple on paper, yet the heart wants what the heart wants. Thats the reason Charlotte is always thinking of James. I have been looking forward to the party scene for a while now and with the way James has been acting I really can't wait to see how it turns out. I flew through the original version of this story so fast and so long ago that, while I remember major events that occur in the story, I forget the dynamic that occurred between character so its almost like reading a brand new story. I Hope that Dom and Gia continue to be bigger parts in the story. The way you have written their characters makes them strong enough to more than just support and I would love to read deeper into their characters. As always, thank you for your writing and I look forward to the next installment.

Author's Response: Haha... yea... life has been a bit uh... challenging lately. to put it mildly. I'm actually pretty happy about some of it though, life changes and we're supposed to change with it. Thanks for the kind words. :)

The party scene will now be a few more chapters away, because I'm adding in some new material. Don't hate me.

I actually keep forgetting about Georgia! Gah. It's horrible. I often add things in based off suggestions from people like you that review often, so I might have to keep working on their characters. In fact... I have an idea as I'm writing this. Thank Merlin (as they say)... inspiration is returning. :D

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Review #47, by AIP Alexander Rage Monster

17th May 2014:
Hey! Just a few quick side notes: A couple chapters ago (maybe 3), you had James walk the mile down to her house at three a.m. to kiss her and tell her he liked her. The next two chapters, he actually admitted it, and spent the whole train ride stealing quick glances of her. So, and this part has me baffled, this chapter you state that he almost kissed her (right after he left the hall), and have him question his feelings for her, when he had already accepted his feelings towards her in the last chapters, stating he liked her, but feeling like he still didn't deserve her. He also told Charlie directly that he didn't fancy her. So, my question is whether or not you forgot to edit this part of the chapter, or you left it in like this deliberately.
On the other hand, reintroducing Asher into the story juices it up a bit [even though it REALLY tears my heart apart (like putting it into a blender)]. I hope you keep the part about the charm James puts in the Halloween party where he makes Charlotte's hair turn gold if she thinks about him. I also really enjoyed Dom's involvement in the chapter even though at times I really wanted to smack her gob shut, but that's a good thing as i draws us closer to the story. Oh yea, and when did James find out about Scorose, did he see them sometime in the past or is he really close to her, enough for her to open up to him about something so personal and obviously impacting knowing who he is. It be nice to see the relation he has with some of his other cousins.
Other than that I'm really enjoying the story so far! Keep posting and don't torture us so much, we feel James's pain as much as he does!
Ps. I really hate Asher right now, he had his chance and took way too long to take his move (4 years!). Everyone clearly knew James was smitten and was slowly making progress (so in other words he had called dibs, and a true bro does't steal another bro's girl). So It would be interesting to see a James vs. Asher conflict that might strain their friendship for a while since everyone could see Charlotte also fancied James just as bad as he did her. So, to make it short:. NOT COOL ASHER!

Until next time!
AIP Alexander

Author's Response: Hi hi!

I have plans for all of that... just slowly working everything in. :) I will be writing the bit about Rose in a future new chapter, and add in some conflict with Asher as well to keep it interesting, and believable. Because, let's admit it, if you were in love with someone, you wouldn't handle it very well if they were with someone else. Especially a friend.

Regarding the part where James is being very confusing to the readers, and not fully owning his feelings and doing something about it... I made that deliberate. I myself have been in a situation very similar, where a guy admitted he really liked me, and then didn't do anything about it, even though it was obvious to everyone around us that we should. Hope that's not too personal, but we tend to write what we know. Only this story has a different ending than mine.

I"m so so so glad you're enjoying the edits. Makes my day. I hope to keep updating regularly, but my life got turned upside down recently and it's been incredibly hard to focus on writing. I plan on editing the next chapter tomorrow, so hopefully that will be up soon.

Please keep the honest (and nice) thoughts coming. Helps me to be a better writer. I really do appreciate it. :)

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Review #48, by HPFAN Rage Monster

17th May 2014:
Always good to read another chapter in this story. The edits are going great, as I'm sure you already know. I really enjoy how much the other members of the family are in this chapter, they are always good for a laugh to two. I look forward to seeing how you everything play out for James, Charlotte and the rest of the gang. Thank you again for your writing and as always I look forward to your next chapter

Author's Response: Hiya!

thanks as always for the review. I'm sorry that i've been a bit slow in updating. My whole life got flipped upside down and I had to move back home, and then on top of that, for the past three days there's been a wildfire burning less than three miles from my house- so needless to say, I haven't gotten much wiring done. I will be picking it up again tomorrow.

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Review #49, by HPFAN Can't Fight This Feeling Anymore

13th May 2014:
GREAT chapter as always. I loved the interactions between all the characters. Your dialogue writing is superb, always has been and this was a great way to introduce Avery, the creepy creep that he is. You can almost feel the tension between Charlotte and James, its near palpable. And now with Asher back in the mix... I really look forward to the upcoming chapters, and to see when James comes to his senses. As always thank you for writing and I look forward to the next update/chapter.

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Review #50, by HPFAN Train Ride

12th May 2014:
This was a good chapter to basically wrap everything that had happened up, which I feel worked out well because of all the hard work and new chapters/ editing you have been doing. It was good to see some of the other characters introduced as well. Harper has also become a nice supporting role and I feel like you could use both her and Ava more not that your have introduced and described them more accurately. As always thank you for the writing and for this story. Hope your real life has calmed down or become a bit less crazy, its never fun to have consistent craziness.

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