*speechless*
that wuz phenomenal
i think i may almost like u better than j.k rowling... ALMOST
lol
write more
and more and more and more
cuz i dont think i'll ever get bored
:)

Author's Response: oopsies double post!

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*speechless*
that wuz phenomenal
i think i may almost like u better than j.k rowling... ALMOST
lol
write more
and more and more and more
cuz i dont think i'll ever get bored
:)

Author's Response: awwwww thanks you're so sweet! haha i know i could never ever beat jkr no worries haha! neways, don't worry i'm going to continue to write - as i said in an earlier review of yours, check out dark infatuation when i post it!

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*whew* What a story! I must say, 8000+ words scared me a bit at first; I'm fine with chapters that length, but one-shots of such magnitude sort of turn me away. But, much to my delight, it actually seemed a whole lot shorter. It was a very engaging read.

At times it seemed like too many endings, too many people dying. . . until I realized everyone died except Ginny. And then I forgave it all. It was very morbid, but somehow more complete with just Ginny left. A smattering of people still alive would have left a lot of broken ends, which are common in fics likes these.

Most disturbing parts? Ginny killing Ron, Draco killing Hermione, Voldemort posessing Harry. Saddest part? The end (no pun intended). Any happy parts? Er, not really. But in a one-shot it's fine.

I also really liked the idea that the end doesn't hurt for those who end, but for those who are left behind. Did you come up with that yourself? Whether you did or not, you did a great job portraying it in this story.

Author's Response: I did come up with that myself, for which I am very proud =) Thank you for the review. This is not my favorite work, by all means, but I thought I might as well post it. Thanks for the review, and for reading it, especially since it is so long.

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This was rather morbid but I like morbid so it was good. The way you described everything using multiple senses was excellent. I especially loved the way you used Harry as the last Horcrux. I was confused at first when you said he hadn't found the last one yet, but by the end I realized the last one was him, which made sense as to why he had the last battle before he found it. I'm assuming that the horcrux was made right as the curse rebounded when Harry was a baby. I've never read anything quite like it, very original and nicely done.

Author's Response: Thanks, and yes, you are correct.

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It's pretty good,apart from the tragedy. I just hope that JKR doesn't End it this way!

Author's Response: Uh....then it wasn't good at all, as the entirety of this story was tragedy, nothing more. That would be the point. I hope JKR ends the story with either Harry having to sacrifice himself for good or his friends having to, as this would make the morals of the story so much more powerful than if he lived. It would illustrate sacrifice much better and more realistically show the consequences of war.

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This is VERY good. The morbidity of it makes it seem all the more real. I actually felt fear myself because you wrote the feeling of it out so well that I felt like I was in the story.

Author's Response: yay! that was, of course, my goal, so snaps for me, haha!

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it was...brilliant!
i'm on the verge of tears...it was just so good :)
i loved the fact that harry was the last horcrux, and that he was aware of what voldemort forced him to do...and then ron kills him, to protect his sister, who'll never understand it, and thus became a murderer. Waow...that's a plot :p
The Draco/Hermione relationship is great as well...and I think Lucius is exactly the kind of man to kill his only son for stupid ideas.
well, again it was a brilliant work!
err, can i ask you something? in fact, i have an account on fanfiction . net and i would be honored if you allowed me to translate your story into french and post it on ffnet. you don't have to say yes of course...lol
but i think your story deserves this! lol
bye!

Author's Response: Oh, go ahead! Translate whatever stories of mine your little heart desires - only give me the link when you're done; I took French as a foreign language and I want to see if I can read it, haha! Btw, thanks for the AMAZING review!!!

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You brought me to tears. I'm still crying as I'm trying to type this. It may because I'm in an over emotional state right now because of a certain person, but none the less, that was amazing. So beautiful... ok so a little depressing, but good. Bloody good.

I love a story that can make you cry. It means that you still are able to feel and this story made me feel so much. I loved how you made everything seem real.

Ok I think I should go dry my eyes.
Mwahs
Late

Author's Response: Wow! Thanks so much! I know what you mean - I'd rather read a sad story than a stupid fluff story most of the time. But I'd always thought I was alone in that. Huh.

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Okay, I LOVE your disclaimer and your author's note!

The story itself, I can't quite put my finger on, to be honest. All the steps are logical and thought out very well. But there is something missing that I simply can't name.

I think.

Well, I grew up in a hard, desperate place that was familiar with street wars, so I know something of this topic. Your events are great, but you haven't quite captured the essence of what it means to be trapped in such a situation. Your descriptions describe a war zone, but the "feel" of it isn't here.

In other words, you can state that someone feels horror, but what actions belie that feeling? I would go back and add some more "gut-wrench" to the imagery and put in some action to reflet the desperation.

Also, don't just say, in essence, Voldemort made Harry kill this person or that person. Show him putting up a real fight, making an attempt to resist. Maybe even ordering Ron to kill him in order to save Ginny. Ginny could still go berserk, after all.

You've got the facts and the reasons, but there are more to the emotions than, "I felt happy" or "I felt sad". The closest you got was Hermione and Draco's death scenes. But more could be done.

I actually like the story as a whole, but the hard, down-in-the-muck-and-the-piss-and-the-beer FEEL isn't here, though it is TRYING to be. Just some re-work could fix it easily. E-mail me off-list if you'd like a hand or need some clarification on anything in my review.

RhiannonMoonchilde@yahoo.com

Blessed Be!
Rhiannon

Author's Response: Hey!

Yeah, I know what you're saying, definitely. I think there's something missing, too; I grew up and still live in a very nice, upper middle class area of so I don't have the personal experience to feed off of. I tried the best I could, though.

However, I'll look over it to see if I could re-work some parts, and I may contact you if I have some trouble.

Thank you for the helpful review - I wish I got constructive criticism more often!

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oOo it's been a very long time since i've read your writing. I'm glad to see that, after all this time, it's still depressing. I'm all for sad endings, I believe that the best stories told don't always end with a happy ending, but, eh, that's my opinion. Anyway, on to the real review. I liked it, nothing new there- I always enjoy reading your work. It hurt to read that most of the characters were killed by a loved one. I mean, Ron killing Harry? Ginny killing Ron? Where do you come up with this stuff? lol. I look forward to reading more of you wonderful, though depressing, one-shots.

Author's Response: Yeah, I suppose I am just a sadistic bitch (please excuse my unpleasant language) who enjoys to torture characters in the most painful ways possible. But that's okay. I've accepted that, haha. Thank you for the review. I'm glad that you liked this 'wonderful, though depressing, one-shot.'

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OMG that was the most amazing thing in this style that i have ever read in my entire life.=D omg - im speechless, i don't knoo what to say. How can yu write so good? OMG. omg. i cried so much...i couldnt hold it in cos it stung my nose =].OMG. i want to say omg again but i think ive said it enough.wow.
Alex xx

Author's Response: Thank you! I must say, angst is definitely my specialty!

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*takes cookie and munches* That was really really close to bringing a tear to my eye. Seriously. That was sad. But I loved it!! IT WAS GREAT! Lol, I can see why even the author (who usually dont like their own work) liked it :) Because it was bordering close to perfection. Well done!

Author's Response: Thank you =D

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oh good lord. That was SO good. I can't think of anything more to say than it was good.

Author's Response: Thank you!

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awww, that was soo sad

Author's Response: yeah, I know...sorry =(

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i love this story. it is so sad. so sick, so twisted, but so undeniably beautiful.
10/10
lurves
li


Author's Response: Thank you. =D

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THAT WAS AMAZING!
No joke, the best story I have every read.
I would give you one billion out of ten if i could.

Author's Response: WOW! Thank you so much; it means so much to me to hear such praise =D

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Wow and omg is all I can say right now. Yea I think you should get back to your novel that way you can get it published and all of us can read it. You are absolutely amazing. I thought only professional authors could write the way you do. You figure out how to attract everyone and although this story is morbid it has truth in it. The End is something no one really knows or understands. I'm going to check out your other stories, hopefully they're at least half as good as this one is. And if it isn't too much work could you please read my stories and review. It would mean so much to me to have an author who writes as good as you, review my stories that aren't even a quater as good as this one.

Author's Response: oops! double post!

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Wow and omg is all I can say right now. Yea I think you should get back to your novel that way you can get it published and all of us can read it. You are absolutely amazing. I thought only professional authors could write the way you do. You figure out how to attract everyone and although this story is morbid it has truth in it. The End is something no one really knows or understands. I'm going to check out your other stories, hopefully they're at least half as good as this one is. And if it isn't too much work could you please read my stories and review. It would mean so much to me to have an author who writes as good as you, review my stories that aren't even a quater as good as this one.

Author's Response: Aw, thanks! Musn't make my head so big - it's already way bigger than it needs to be! I'd be happy to read your stories although I may take some time as I am very busy...pretty much all the time.

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Well, you wanted a review.so here goes. (lol)

It was.interesting.morbid, as you say.I like that you told everything in detail though.

Author's Response: Thanks. Yes, I tend to write morbid, twisted stories - they're all I can really write effectively, unfortunatley. Need to work on that, haha.

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OMG! I t brought a tear to my eye at the end! Why did Ginny kill Ron? Uh duh silly me he killed Harry. She must have really loved him to kill her own brother. Still sad and deep story! Loved it!

Author's Response: Thanks! I know the Ginny-killing-Ron thing is kind of twisted, but I think it shows how people can not think when someone hurts someone they love so deeply, and can do something that they will later regret.

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morbid, yes and yet so beautiful in an odd way
poor ginny!
10/10!

Author's Response: Thank you. That was my goal.

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Wow this brought tears to my eyes. Is was beautifully sad. I have read some stories where things that happened in this story happen. But this story is a one of a kind. It is great. I love it.

Author's Response: Thanks. I haven't read any versions of the final battle, so this is completely my own - so I hope it's one of a kind!

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That was really beautiful, I don't quite know if everyone using the Avada Kedavra curse was the best way to kill people, as Moody himself said "you could all point your wands at me and say it, but the worst I would get is a nosebleed".
That was even proven to be partially true when Harry used the Cruciatus Curse on Bellatrix in the Ministry and he was filled with hatred for her.
But despite that, it was very well written, yes it was very morbid but a good piece of work. I loved your monologue on The End and how you repeated it at the end, and definately how Ginny walked away from it all.
Very well done!

Author's Response: Thank you, for both the praise and the insight. I didn't really think about that =D

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wow that was awesome! I usually don't like pieces as dark as this, but that was intense! I'm going to go check out some of your other stories now... great job on this one!

Author's Response: Thank you so much! Hope you like the others, although I wrote some of them as early as two years ago so the writing isn't as great...

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wow. that was very powerful, sad, true. you are a teriffic writer and i am now going to read ALL of you other stories, if i can find them!
zoe

p.s. this made me cry

Author's Response: Wow! Um, thanks!

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