Reading Reviews for This changes everything
  
63 Reviews Found

Review #26, by Avanell 2 Secrets revealed

14th December 2012:
Awesome update! More, please!

Author's Response: Thanks, glad you like it! :)

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Review #27, by Ginger Lust Secrets revealed

14th December 2012:
YAY! I was so happy to see a chapter. And I do understand that real life is busy. But man, I hate when they close for Xmas...
Anyway, back to story.
OMG! Poor Hermione. But she better straighten up and do what she needs to get better. I know she's depressed but so many people love her so much. And our beloved Ron needs her.
As to 'the bad guy', I can't wait to see what you have in store for him. I mean, he did save Hermione's life but that doesn't change the fact that he was involved in her kidnapping. And if she hadn't been kidnapped, she wouldn't have lost the baby!
I personally would have used the veritasersum on him anyway. Harry is too soft... Ha ha ha Yes! I'm a brute.
I really like this Danny character. I hope he stays a 'good guy'. He seems competent.
Oh! And where is our poor Ron? What have you done with him? :-) 'James' better hope Ron doesn't see him. I just don't want Ron to be thrown into Azkaban for killing him.

So many cliffhangers. And have to wait for answers. But I've decided that I need to re-read the whole story anyway as I need to see it as a flowing, complete piece, if you know what I mean.
So 'see' ya after Xmas and into the new year.

And HEY! You mentioned me. YAY! I'm famous! Anyone want my autograph? :-)
There for ya, Babe!

So Happy Xmas and Happy New Year to you.

Author's Response: Hey, sorry this is late!
Yeah, I tend to leave a little too many cliff hangers!
Haha, no problem and Merry Xmas! :)
Thanks for the review!


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Review #28, by imacullenpottergirl Finding out

8th December 2012:
Hi!

I really enjoyed this chapter! It was really sweet, and humorous, but at the same time had quite a lot going on. I really think Hermione and Ron are really cute together in this chapter, and even though it may be a little too soon in their relationship, i think that it might work out.

A great start, to what seems like a really great read!

- Abhi

Author's Response: Hey, I'm glad you liked it!
Thanks for the review! :)


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Review #29, by wytchkitty13 Finding out

6th December 2012:
Wow, what a beginning! Oh hi I'm here from the holiday review swap lol.

As I was saying, this beginning was interesting to say the least. I was really shocked about the pregnancy so soon. It's interesting to find out where you go from here. I was a little worried at first that Ron would be either upset or feel like he couldn't handle it.
But thankfully he was ok with it and awww they fell asleep together. What a sweet moment.
Great first chapter! :)

Author's Response: Hey, glad you liked it.
Yeah, I'm not so good with building up to the action :P
Thanks for the review! :)


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Review #30, by Avanell 2 Healing

9th November 2012:
Great updates, so sorry for the loss!

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing!
Glad you enjoying it and yeah, thanks! :)


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Review #31, by Ginger Lust Healing

8th November 2012:
Ohhh. So sad. But I expected Hermione to lose the baby, after the last chapter. So it didn't come as a shock.
I'm a little worried about Ron. He could lose it. either in sorrow or revenge.
And of course... poor Hermione. To lose her first (or any, really) baby. I see she's feeling guilty already.

I can hardly wait for more... :-) But I shall!!

Author's Response: Hey sorry for the late reply, real life has been hectic!
I'll try to update as soon as possible, sorry for the wait!
Thanks for the review! :)


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Review #32, by Ginger Lust Attack and discover

4th November 2012:
Wow...
First of all, thank you a thousand times for updating so quickly. Seems all the other stories have completely stopped updating since school started. I eagerly look everyday for yours!

Now... Wow! I can hardly wait to see what happens next. Ron will flip! Both with happiness and anger. I hope Hermione is safe now. Lordy... Ron will never let her out of his sight again. lol

And I can't stand not knowing who the man who is helping her is. And will he die for it. So many questions.

OK. Ready for more now.
Great job.

Author's Response: Aha, no problem although I've just had a week off and school starts again tomorrow but i'll do my best! :)
All will be revealed, someday (or will it)! :P
Glad you're still liking it though and thanks for reviewing! :)


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Review #33, by Ginger Lust Gone again

2nd November 2012:
Alright! Now we're getting somewhere.
Poor Ron. I think you did him perfect here. I would have PT'd him myself. For his own good.
And is the 'prison guard' this missing Shane man? Just a thought. I even thought maybe the 'Boss' of 'prison guard' may be missing Auror... Mighty suspicious!
OMG! I hope Hermione is alright. Hope baby's alright. Ron will just kill if not.

I had missed the last chapter when it first came out, so I got to read 2 chapters at once.
Eagerly awaiting more.

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for reviewing!
Glad you thought I did the right thing with Ron, wasn't sure weather it was too extreme or not!
Ahh, you'll just have to wait and see and poor Hermione, I agree Ron will probably go mental if something happens.
The next chapter is in the queue so shouldn't be too long! :)


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Review #34, by Ginger Lust A surprise

25th October 2012:
Hi. Still with ya. Just not much to say... quietly and eagerly and worryingly (biting fingernails!) awaiting more. I really do hate to see Ron so sad... I hope Hermione's OK. Detect a little pain in her clutching her stomache... Don't tell me! I don't want to know yet! he he.
Keep up good work.

Author's Response: Hey, glad you're enjoying it! :)
I'll try to update quickly and thanks for reviewing! :D


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Review #35, by cartoonheart94 Angry tales

20th September 2012:
nice chapter, i like the way ron is so apt to taking responsibility for hermione and the baby, even goin to the extent of overworking himself. no complaints, good chapter

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for reviewing! :)
Glad you liked it and don't have any complaints!
Thanks again for reviewing! :)


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Review #36, by FallenAmaranth St. Mungos

13th September 2012:
Hi! Here with your review!

So I'm going to focus on your characterization and the believability, since that was what you requested :)

So, your characterizations were good, Ron was very calm and loving - I'm used to him being all nervous but I'm sure that, as he matured, and after what he's been through, he would have become more confident. Hermione was as polite and composed as she would usually be, however, the only 'Hermione-ish' comment was the one line thought about looking up some more information about her pregnancy in a library. Perhaps, being smart and intrigued by things which she doesn't know about, she would show interest in the spells the Healer performed. Or perhaps she would question her about anything she wanted to know...just a few more little things, to remind us that Hermione is definitely still Hermione ;)

Believability - I think this is very believable and it all seems realistic enough, although I was a little confused about the spells that the healer was casting - she cast them with her wand, so why would she need to go out of the room to look at what they say? Otherwise, it seems fairly believable save for...

...Emotion and Description. We do not get to see enough of how Ron or Hermione feels about everything that happens. How does Hermione feel in the waiting room without Ron - does she glance surreptitiously at the other patients, or when she's walking down the corridor to room 26 - are the letters on the door glinting with polish, or are they dull and unkempt, or when Ron turns up, what is the effect on her, is she excited? Make the reader feel whatever it is that Hermione is feeling. Put them right there in the room with her.

One other thing I noticed right at the beginning was repetition. In the opening paragraph it was stated that Hermione was only going for a check up and to see how far along she was. One of the first thing the healer says is pretty much exactly the same thing - if there is a lot of repetition of phrases and not enough variation of information then the readers may lose interest. The least it needs is rephrasing, just so the reader isn't reading the same thing twice.

A few grammar tweaks, most of which I mentioned in my previous review, and adding in the advice I gave you in this one, and this chapter should be perfect!

~ Em

Author's Response: Hey, thank you for the review! :)
Thanks for the advice, I'll have a look over the chapters and see what I can tweek but I'm glad you liked it though.
Thanks again for reviewing!


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Review #37, by cartoonheart94 St. Mungos

13th September 2012:
hello, cartoonheart here again.
i read this chapter and i think it's still going good. you kind of lost me somewhere in the middle but i re-read it and all is well :)
i think that you have still managed to keep the characters real enough, though i would make hermione a little more smart-alecky, like she was in the books.
great chapter though, i look forward to seeing the next chapter.

your mate, cartoonheart

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for reviewing!
I'm glad you liked it and I'll go through it, see what I can change to Hermione.
Glad you liked it though and thanks again for reviewing! :)


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Review #38, by cartoonheart94 Finding out

9th September 2012:
hi, this is cartoonheart94 with your requested review.
so far, i think i like where this story is headed. You got in so many details in so little words and this could either be disastrous or genius, but good for you, it went the other way. i felt like i was given the adequate background info on the characters without feeling like i had just been dipped in an angsty pool of the without. i think so far, you have managed to keep the characters in character and that is another thing i like about it.
i noticed a few grammar flaws but nothing too severe to worry about, it was a good chapter, one with a promising plot ahead.

-Cartoonheart-

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for the review!
I'm glad you like it and where it is going and I have requested a beta so hopefully those little grammer mistakes will clear up!
Thanks again for reviewing!


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Review #39, by Jon St. Mungos

6th September 2012:
This is too sweet. Keep up the good work. I am a huge Romonie fan

Author's Response: Thanks! :)
Glad you like it!


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Review #40, by S. Heil Finding out

2nd September 2012:
You should have a small chapter in the beginning like an epilogue that explains what happened after they defeated Voldemort. Something that explains a little more how Hermione got her flat and why. What happened to her parents? Why did Hermione and Ron decide to be just friends? Then you could go into this chapter. It is pretty well written and if it was a book I would read it, but again I think it would help to have a little more background in the beginning instead of just jumping right in.

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for reviewing and I'm glad you liked it! :)
I did start to write something like that and I'll think about putting it up!
Thanks again for reviewing!


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Review #41, by Jchrissy Finding out

28th August 2012:
Hello! This was a very sweet start! It's nice that you have them as adults and already working, and that they took a break and just remained friends for a bit before they jumped back into their relationship.

You still have a few rough patches, I think that beta could really help with those :). Beta readers are the best, I don't know what I'd do without mine half the time.

I liked that you had Hermione instinctively trying to pull away from Ron, I'm sure she was very scared and talking about it probably wasn't the top thing on her to do list.

I also liked Ron's hesitation. I think you may even be able to expand on that. We know Ron isn't the best with women, or words, or thinking things through... maybe muttering something that was suppose to sound supportive but really just sounded a bit jerky would be good? It seems like Hermione and him are always suffering from some sort of communication difficulty, so maybe you can play with that a bit in here until they get to that 'it'll be okay' conclusion.

I would have also loved to see more of Hermione's thought process after finding out. I'm sure she's aiming toward high goals with the ministry, and even if she does love and want to keep the baby, there was probably some serious doubt at first and those normal - this wasn't how I planned it - feelings.

Besides those few comments, I really think this is a solid first chapter. You jumped right into the story and that was excellent. Your flow was nice and everything felt easy to follow!

You also do a great job with choosing a variety of words, which always keeps a story interesting.

Like I said earlier, it was also a very nice time frame to put them in and something different from the teen pregnancy stories that I see a lot of. I always thought that Ron would have been a bit slow with proposing, and in my head canon this is actually what gets him to do that final step, so it was fun to see him promise to stick by her.

I hope this review was helpful, please feel free to re-request any time!

Thanks!

Jami

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for reviewing.
I've requested a beta on the forums I'm just waiting for somone to pick it up.
I'm glad you thought the characterisation was good and I'll go thorugh and edit it! :)


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Review #42, by FallenAmaranth Finding out

27th August 2012:
This was incredibly sweet, both Ron and Hermione were very much in character, and exactly as I would imagine them to be. I thought Ron's reaction to 'finding out' was brilliant, he wasn't jumping to be over-excited, but I never thought he would be at first, since he can be nervous and wouldn't know what to immediately say - as he said, he was shocked - but he'd totally stay by Hermione's side :)

To improve, you could either request in a beta reader or just take extra care when re-reading(I'm terrible at this) to just comb through for spelling mistakes. There were a few issues with grammar, namely the one I'm just getting out of the habit of, which is;

"Ok well Iíll come by later, love you." He gave her a quick kiss on the cheek.

^ This should have a comma after 'you' and the 'H' in 'He' should be lower case. This happens in quite a lot of your dialogue, but is easily altered. So it should be ' "...love you," he gave her a quick kiss... ' If you get me :)

Also, a bit more description would make it flow better, and different lengths of sentences could also add more effect.

Describe the room, the chair he sits on, the state of the door handle, the way he eats the sandwich or how it smells. Is the flat dimly lit or is it bright? Etcetera etcetera. It's a really amazing plot and idea, and the characterization is brilliant, but to make it fabulous you have to make the reader relate to the story, so they feel like they are there in the flat with them, or it's them who are feeling all those emotions at the prospect of being a parent.

I'm looking forward to seeing how this goes! :-D

~ Emily

Author's Response: Hey, I'm glad you liked it! :)
I'm glad you though Ron and Hermione were in character!
I've requested a beta for this on the forums, just waiting for someone to fill it.
I'll go through and see what I can do to describe it more.
Thanks for reviewing! :)


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Review #43, by Cavell Finding out

25th August 2012:
I definitely don't read much Ron/Hermione - or any of the trio, admittedly - but even I know that this was a genuinely good start to what is turning out to be quite an interesting story! I didn't see too many mistakes, though there was some that I did spot:

the grandfather clock had not long chimed 11:00pm - I think this would be better phrased as something else. Maybe try: the grandfather clock having not long before chimed 11:00pm?

Kingsley is also spelled with an 'e' - don't forget that, love ;)

Oh, and it's 'vaguely', not 'vaugly' - this is such a good story and I don't want it to be marred by little mistakes. Oh, and by Victoria do you mean Victoire, Bill and Fleur's daughter? I was kind of confused by that, I'm afraid to admit.

I found it really interesting that Ron and Hermione have only been dating for a month - definitely a twist to the average story, but a good one nonetheless. I'm actually wondering why you had it that way, but I know you have a good reason for it which I can't wait to hear. I also noticed that Ron wasn't an Auror - so many twists in this story, but you definitely manage to pull it off - and your reason was actually very reasonable, so well done!

I'm so used to pregnant people as teens, still Hogwarts-age, so it was definitely nice that Ron and Hermione actually had jobs and were out of school. It just makes it easier for everyone, so I'm definitely glad you had it that way. The flow is good - sometimes it's a bit choppy, but that's mostly unnoticeable so don't worry about it. Ron and Hermione are also perfectly canon and true to themselves, so well done about that!

All in all, this was a good introduction to the story and it was definitely a nice read and a good deviation from the usual. Thanks so much for requesting, and good luck with the rest of the story, love! If you fix everything I mentioned up above, this chapter would be even better :D

--Linn

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for the review! :)
I'll go through and edit the mistakes and yeah, I meant Bill and Fleurs daughter.
I'm glad you liked it though and thanks again for reviewing! :)


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Review #44, by slytherinchica08 Finding out

23rd August 2012:
I thought that this was rather sweet and liked the take on it. I think your idea here is rather interesting and different that they didn't get together for another two years after the war and then end up pregnant after only a short amount of time. I think your characterization is pretty good and I am interested to see where you plan on taking the story. I only found a couple of small errors in this chapter and it was here, "That was a small part of the reason he hadn't did his Auror training with Harry." did should be done. And here, "You work to hard" to should be too. Other than those small mistakes I couldn't spot any other errors so great job on that. I think you had Ron's reaction pretty realistic, being a little shocked at first but still wanting to be with her no matter what. Great Job!

~Slytherinchica08~

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for reviewing! :)
I'm glad you liked it and I'll go back and fix the errors when I edit it!
Thanks again for reviewing! :)


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Review #45, by EverDiggory Finding out

21st August 2012:
Here with your review!

Plot: This is cute! I really do love Ron/Hermione and this was such a cute beginning! I love stories like this, and I'm surprised by how good of a story this is for a first story!

Grammar/Spelling: There were a few mistakes here and there, so I'd recommed requesting a beta on the forums(:

Interest: There's plenty of interest! You really managed to hook me on this story, so I'm looking forward to reading more.

Characterization: While they both seem just slightly, slightly OOC, I enjoy reading it. I've never been a stickler for canon or anything, so I enjoy it. I really would like to know more about the characters, and see your take on them. You assume we know the characters, and we do!, but its improtant that you describe your take on them and characterizae them as though we don't.

Imagery: I would really, really like to see more of this. I liked the description of the intended to be therapeutic blue walls, but other than that there wasn't much description of Hermione or Ron's appearance, or their surroundings. imagery really brings the story to life and I think it's definitely important to have.

Emotions: I feel like we get most of the emotions, but it seems to me like perhaps you should describe the emotions more? I can sort of guess, but the goal is to fully explain to the readers what the characters are feeling.

Thanks for requesting!

xx

Ever

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for reviewing! :)
I'm glad you liked it and I've took your advice adn requested a beta on the forums, so thanks for that.
I'll keep your CC in mind when I edit it and thanks again for reviewing! :)


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Review #46, by BellaFan202 Finding out

20th August 2012:
I'm really proud of myself for getting this review to you so soon. :)

When it's talking about how Ron is saving his money for Auror Training, you wrote "That was a small part of the reason he hadn't did his Auror training with Harry," but the 'did' should be a 'done'. Probably just a typo but I thought I would point it out.

There are a few other typos that could be fixed with a quick reread of the chapter, like somethings that aren't capitalized that should be or vice versa (Dept. of Regulations and Control of Magical Creatures, for example) a couple commas where there should be a period or semi colon ("I thought to day was your day off; why were you doing paper work?"). A few misused or misspelled words herea nd there. There are just several random typos. I would recommend either reading what you write several times before you post, or getting a beta. Or maybe even both, would be the better choice.

And now about the story:

I liked it. I wasn't too drawn in at the beginning and I could foresee her being pregnant, but it's good and I like it. However, I can't really picture Hermione being so tolerant of him making a big, crumby mess in her living room, or making him food the second he walks in the door. It just doesn't seem like a Hermione thing. I also don't really see Ron automatically asking for a sandwich. He's a big boy, he can make him own food. I'm not trying to be mean, this is just my opinion; you don't even need to listen to it. :)

Thanks for requesting. If you want me to review the next chapter, don't forget to request the next chapter. :)

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for revieiwing! :)
I'll look into getting a beta and thanks for the CC, I'll take it into account when I edit the story.
I'm glad you liked it though and thanks again for reviewing! :)


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Review #47, by Aether Gone but people are looking

8th July 2012:
I can really feel for Harry, Ginny and Ron in this chapter. It must be so scary to have lost Hermione, especially since she's pregnant. I'm excited to see how Hermione will deal with the situation. I'm kind of hoping that she'll find a way to out-smart her captors. :) She's kind of awesome like that.

In action scenes, splitting up long paragraphs into short ones can be a good way to replicate the speed of the battle. Long paragraphs sometimes slow the reader down, and they can take away from action scenes.

The drama and the suspense in this chapter is excellent. I've really enjoyed this story, and I'm surprised it doesn't have more reviews!

The questions I asked in earlier reviews were really just meant for you to think, you don't have to answer them in the review reply. I feel that it helps me when people ask me questions in reviews because it forces me to think about characters more. Hope my reviews were helpful! Thank you for requesting! :)

Aether

Author's Response: Thank you so much- these have made my night :)
I hope she does do (I haven't decided where the story is going :L)
I'll take what you said into account and try to improve my story :)
Thank you so much for the reviews :D


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Review #48, by Aether The caterwauling charm

8th July 2012:
Ah! Cliff-hanger. :) I'm so glad your next chapter is already posted. I'm still curious about how Ginny and Harry feel about the pregnancy. How has learning about their friends/brother's pregnancy affected their relationship? Are they fully supportive? Scared for Hermione? Excited to be Uncle/Aunt? Great job! Looking forward to reading on...

Aether

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! :)
I think I might just go back through the entire story so far an dry to put in more description/ dialogue because I keep saying I'll go back and answer your questions :P
Glad you're enjoying it :D


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Review #49, by Aether Warnings and the grangers

8th July 2012:
I'm really enjoying this story! :) I can see that Hermione and Ron are really in love and supportive of each other. Their bickering in the beginning was also really great because it was a nice way to show dimension to their relationship.

This might seem nitpicky and weird, but it's a general rule of thumb: when writing numbers in stories, writers generally spell out numbers that are below 100 (eg, nineteen, twenty-one, thirty-three, 101, 10,000). Now that I've told you this, you might notice it more when you're reading other books/stories. I don't think it really matters that much, but I feel that it looks a little informal and awkward when numbers aren't spelled out, even if people don't know about that rule.

Anyway, great chapter. It was nice to meet Hermione's parents! I had more questions about them that could have been answered with more details, again. Don't fear adding more description/dialogue. It will only give more depth to your characters and plot line, which will pull readers in more. Betas are really helpful with that sort of thing, because they can prompt more dialogue/description with questions.

I think it's completely realistic that Hermione and Ron are still worried about Death Eaters, and I love the new element it adds to your story. :)

This one sentence caught my attention: At 11:50 am two figures appeared in an alley way next too Hunters lane. "Alley way" should be alleyway and "too" should be "to." Capitalization problems, especially after quotes, are in this chapter, which are easily fixed with a few read-throughs. :)

Nice chapter! Reading on!

Aether

Author's Response: I'm glad you're still enjoying the story :D
I hadn't heard about that rule before, I'll keep it in mind from now on, thanks for letting me know!
I'll see what I can do with Hermione's parents, see if I can answer some of your questions :)
I'll go back and fix the grammar/capatilisation errors!
Thanks again :D


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Review #50, by Aether Angry tales

8th July 2012:
Awww, they're so in love! :) I love how adorable Ron and Hermione are. Ron is so supportive, and I think that's really great! I was very surprised when Molly scolded Hermione for being pregnant, especially since she was probably pretty young when she started having babies (since she's had so many, fairly spread apart in age). However, I was really relieved to hear her apologize. I can imagine that she was just being really hot-headed.

More, more, more is my only complaint! I feel like this chapter could be three times as long as it is. Dialogue is a really great way to give the reader a better understanding of the characters' personalities, how they interact with each other, and it prevents the build-up of description, like in the paragraph that begins with "They were the last to arrive at the burrow..." You tell us outright about the various characters, but I feel like dialogue could have broken up that paragraph and revealed more about the characters.

Really great job on this chapter, though. Grammar looks really good in this chapter, though small things catch my eye, like "burrow" should be capitalized, I believe. Description takes a lot of extra effort/time/work and you also have to understand your characters a lot better to add it, but it definitely adds a lot to a story. :)

Whenever I'm editing, it's always the first thing I look to add: where can I explain things better with more dialogue/description?

Excellent second chapter!

Aether

Author's Response: I'm glad you're enjoying it, I love writing about Ron and Hermione :)
I'll see what I can do to add more description/dialogue to make the chapter better!
I'll also go back and fix the grammar/capitalisation errors :)
Thanks again for reviewing :D


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