Good job on this chapter. Actually, you're doing really well on the whole story -- each chapter adds more depth to both characters and plot.
Also, I love your description! I can really get a feel for everything in the story. :)Author's Response: i'm so glad you think so, and the descriptions do tend to be what i focus on most ;) thanks so much love x Report Review
"The lights are my favorite; they cast the expanse of the hall in a glow of hazy blue and purple hues like a fog from a dream sequence..."
I like how you described the utter perfection of the evening in one simple line and juxtaposed it with the sinister undertones of the shadows, like Bella's nightmare and her conflicting emotions at the dance, regarding Scorpius and Rose, and also, Albus. I thought how Bella paralleled herself as a shadow and an intruder was intriguing. She's so insecure and you portray that feeling really well, like when she's wondering whether Albus trusts her or not and she answers her unspoken question herself. If I were Albus, I would trust Bella the most, but her secrecy is suspicious...
I almost wish he would find out soon about the project so that he can protect Bella...well, that's how I hope he would react!
Anyway. Another beautifully, well-written chapter with respect shown to your ability to clearly write an original character with realistic emotions. Looking forward to your next chapter!Author's Response: aw i'm glad you liked this, especially that line - that just so happens to be one of my favorites as well, good choice ;) haha, but that's so sweet!
and i did try to throw in a bit of the shadows, because the whole thing is about to be revealed really soon, like in a couple of chapters, so i wanted to speed it up and make the whole presence more prominent.
you're so sweet; i'll definitely update as soon as the queue reopens! x Report Review
Ii know you have heard this before but I hate jade.i know she dosen't know about al and Bella.also what if al and bella got into this huge fight and he said she doesn't trust him and everything is different ever since she said that she loved him and jade is watching the whole thing .Author's Response: ah i know, jade is one of those love/hate characters, so i understand totally(:
haha that would be so awkward if jade saw that! but i guess that's one way for jade to find out about bella and albus, although that would definitely not be ideal ;)
thanks for reviewing! x Report Review
This cliffhanger is killing me. I NEED TO KNOW!
Anyway, this was a great chapter. I love Scorpius and Arabella's friendship. I feel bad for Rose, but I'm sure she'll have her time with Scorpius eventually (hopefully).Author's Response: i do love cliffhangers, that's like my favorite part of writing each chapter, but i know it's super cruel, i'm sorry! don't worry, everything will definitely clear up soon though :)
and yes, rose and scorpius will have their moments later - but under certain situations ;) thanks for the review! x Report Review
AHH this is so goood! :) Your cliffhangers are amazing... Even though I kind of hate them because now I'm on edge. This whole story is absolutely brilliant. In the beginning, I kind of felt that Bella was cold and emotionless, or at least really awkward and hidden about her emotions. Now I get the feeling that she's more scared than anything.
This chapter totally started to connect all the dots for me! Is Bella going to talk to Ryan, or did she decide against it? I was confused about that part. The Shadowwwsss... What do they want with Albus?? Ahh, I can't wait to find out! :)
Thank you for an amazing story so far! The chapter length and lack-of-need-for-editing are dreamy, by the way.
-CatAuthor's Response: aw thank you! i'm so glad it's working out, cause you never know, cliffhangers can kinda ruin chapters sometimes ;) i agree, bella's personality is starting to open up more throughout the story, because she did seem a bit cold in the beginning
and about ryan, bella wanted to speak to him about his father, but then she decided not to cause she found out what she needed from tiffany, and she didn't think it was necessary to put ryan in such an awkward position :)
the shadows will be making their official appearance soon, i promise! and that's so sweet, i'm so glad you think that! aw, thanks so much x Report Review
SUGAR-HONEY-ICED-TEA!ARE WE GOING TO FIND OUT WHO THE GUY IS!OH MY GOD!okay but honestly this story is amazing and i can't wait for the next chapter(:Author's Response: haha, aw thank you so much! and yes you will ;) x Report Review
Ooh, a new chapter and so much happened!
This group called the Shadows sound pretty gruesome, but I wish she'd gone into more detail! But I'm sure we'll find out more soon...speaking of, there's more to the story of mr Hanson, isn't there? I quite like the idea of Scorpius and Arabella being the dynamic duo (not quite the trio with Rose yet...little awkward!) and investigating things, being resourceful...i think Ryan's dad has nightmares like arabella but he's been driven mad, perhaps a little foreshadowing? Just a prediction, but it's probably not right: everything you write is unexpected! But that's why I love this story so much; it's really different to all the others I've read.
Also, I felt really sorry for Rose but I'm glad she accepted it otherwise it could have been painfully awkward. Like when Jade told Arabella that Albus was her date...
Only thing is, next chapter should have more albus!
Looking forward to the Yule ball...next chapter? more investigating? The suspicious nature of Adriana? You leave me with too many questions! But I love it ;)Author's Response: the shadows are definitely a bad group and you'll find out really soon just how heartless they are, and what their purpose is - it does have something to do with bella's mother and what she's been working with too ;)
mr hanson definitely is having some form of nightmares, but not in the way that bella does; there is a bit of foreshadowing there though, you're right!
aw i know, scorpius and bella are very good at working as a team, which is why i love their friendship, but once rose is on board with it all, everything should work even better, unless something else comes up.
the next chapter IS about the yule ball actually, and luckily, there's definitely a lot of albus in that one ;) aw but thank you so much for your review, i loved reading it so much! i'll definitely post the next chapter in queue tonight x Report Review
The thrill I get from reading this is almost as big as the thrill when I see it's been updated! Great chapter, I really like Scorpius' and Bella's relationship...but I hope Rose knows what's going on or that is potentially very awkward.
I know I've said it before but I really have to say it again, your plot is so intriguing. There's so many characters yet it feels like they're all very real, and even characters like Tiffany and Adriana are interesting because I gave no idea where you're taking them and it's so unpredictable. (that's true for all the characters really.)
I was wondering though, do all the teachers really think that Al's fall was a prank...considering the consequences, it seems a bit lax if they just dismiss it? Also, I'm guessing that only Bella saw the shadow wrap around Al? But wouldn't Al have felt it...or is there more to it than Al is revealing?
Anyway, another well-written chapter! Excited to see the reaction (or potential fallout?) over this new relationship between Scorpius and Bella, and to see what is going to happen at the Yule ball - perhaps another attack of the shadows?Author's Response: AW you're such a sweetheart, thank you! haha, i know, bella and scorpius' friendship definitely keeps evolving - just keepin' things a little unpredictable ;)
ahhh i'm so glad you like the characterization! and the plot too; i'm really happy it's working out at the moment, i was quite worried about it before.
at the moment, most of the teachers do seem to think it was some kind of prank since their search for a clue hasn't given them any answers. however, there are a few teachers who definitely suspect something wrong.
everyone saw the shadow, but bella was able to connect the figure with her nightmares, which made it more threatening.
but thanks for the review, lily! x Report Review
OMG This story is awesome!!! Her and Scorpius are going to be fake dating?!? Hopefully this will get a rise out of Albus!!! And I'd bet Dobby's sacred sock that Adriana has something to do with whats happening to Al! That or she used to date Scorpius.
~LimwenAuthor's Response: haha oh yes, and you never know! but he's bound to get a little bit suspicious ;) oh, and adriana is a special one, that's so true. just make sure to keep an eye on her, but you'll definitely find out why soon(:
thanks for the review love, and i will! x Report Review
I did not expect this turn in Scorpius and Bella's relationship, I wonder what Rose and Al think about that they go to the Yule ball together, or if this will somehow prompt Al into something new.
And why should she not tell Adriana about the Project? Is she a gossip, or is she just another Al fan? ;)
So do the teachers (and Harry?) also think that this is a prank?Author's Response: haha, don't worry about those two, it's not supposed to be anything official - it's just to trick everyone else ;) but it would be pretty interesting to see al's reaction, especially since she told him how much she liked him and everything
well, from what bella sees, adriana is really sweet, but scorpius is suspicious about a lot of people, so that's the only reason why she was told not to tell her.
as for the whole prank thing, the teachers had been trying to find out who did it, but since they've found nothing, they were forced to assume it was a prank, so harry thought the same too.
thanks for the review! :) x Report Review
Wow this is so intriguing
Can't wait for more...
I love Scorpius and Bella's friendship. I like how the conversation is entertwined with Quidditch and then the weird shadow thing...
Though I'm curious about the snitch as well ;)
Let's see what the rest of the school thinks now!Author's Response: i know, scorpius does play a vital role as bella's friend, but it'll definitely be more important later :) and you'll find out what the school thinks of it soon!
haha, thanks so much for the review x Report Review
Oh my gosh. Please, please please continue writing this, it's absolutely incredible. The suspense, and the way you can FEEL the electricity sparks Arabella senses when she's near Albus, it's beautifully written. Update fast, please! Amazing story.Author's Response: aw you, thank you so much! this is actually so sweet, i'll definitely update soon x Report Review
This was so scary and intense! I thought for a minute that the friendship between Scorpius and Bella was about to be lost, but I am so glad that they didn't get in a fight and that he reassured her. What a good friend. And then the shadow! Oh my gosh that was so scary, my heart was racing! I love that you can write a scary scene, and it isn't over dramatic or anything. I am really anxious to find out more about it, and I am so worried about Al! I feel like I am there with the characters, worrying about what is going to happen next. I just love that feeling, even though it is quite scary right now. Your story just pieces together so well and you always manage to leave us with a cliffhanger, which is always frustrating, but in the best way :) It makes me so excited for the next chapter! I love seeing that this has been updated, because it is one of the most exciting stories I am reading! I love it and can't wait for more. See you next time :)Author's Response: ONE OF MY FAVORITE REVIEWERS, HEY YOU!
oh, scorp and bella are tight like that, and at the moment, they're not gonna let this whole project get in the way of their friendship, BUT that may be tested later on. maybe. ;)
aw i hope it didn't freak you out too much! ah i'm so glad it had such an affect though(: actually, i've tried writing really dramatic scenes before and it never works out for me without sounding too cheesy and everything, so i find i like to just make all the action kinda subtle.
and well spotted, i do like my cliffhangers ;) they're so much fun to write, but i'm sorry! aw you are the cutest thing, thanks so much love x Report Review
So no one won the quidditch match?
Haha, just kidding! Seriously, great chapter. I couldn't help but be drawn in. I like how it started off with the pre quidditch anxieties but developed into something much more thrilling. It's really weird but as i read. I feel nervous like I can almost feel the emotion that Arabella feels...her jealousy, her fear...and that's what makes this story so good because not only is it unpredictable, the clarity of emotions add to the plot so much, and I just want to keep reading!
Plus the shadows finally attacked - can't wait to see where you're taking it next.Author's Response: haha, unfortunately ;)
aw thank you! i'm so glad you feel that way, that's so exciting! aha, not gonna lie, i really like the fact that you got drawn into the story, i'm just gonna go do my little victory dance later or something (in the corner, y'know how it is)
i'll definitely update soon, and thanks again! x Report Review
I like how the story progresses, because there is definitely tension in the friendship between Jade and Bella, and I don't know how it is all going to work out. I love the mystery of everything and how you keep forming this cloudy picture in the reader's mind, so they have such a clear idea of the vision, but confusion because they know no more details than Bella. It is such an interesting plot line! I really am having such a great time reading it! Update soon? :)Author's Response: yeah, bella and jade are still considered 'best friends', but with albus and the nightmares, it definitely puts a strain on their friendship
aw thank you! haha, i'm trying to have everything that bella knows given to the reader, so they can connect to how she sees everything too :)
i will, the next chapter is in the queue; and thank you! x Report Review
Does Jade know that Bella likes Albus?
And since when does Bella like him?
I thought it was a recent thing, but it seems like she liked him before Jade and Albus became a couple.
I didnt thing that J&A were a couple before since Rose tries to matchmake them, and there must have been some reason to why they broke up, although it seems they remained best friends.
So much mystery! Can't wait for the next chapterAuthor's Response: haha, so to first answer your questions:
- no, jade doesn't know bella likes albus, and neither does rose. scorpius seems like he might know, but he never mentions it to bella
- bella's liked albus for quite a while; i think it started around their 3rd/4th year but it's only really gotten more intense now, in her sixth year
yeah, there's a bit of a reason to why jade and albus broke up, but i promise i'll get to it really soon ;)
thank you so much! x Report Review
Poor girl. She had to go through accidentally telling her secret to Albus, and then facing his kind--but disappointing--rejection.
So far the story looks good and reads well. Excellent work. :)Author's Response: thank you so much! x Report Review
This is really different from any Albus story I've read so far, and I'm intrigued. It all seems a little bit darker, more mysterious than most.
Strong beginning! I like it. :)Author's Response: aw thank you! haha, it's a bit of a mystery ;) x Report Review
This story is electric! It's so unpredictable and the way you write arabella and all the other characters indicates a startling clarity of the capacity of human emotion.
Absolutely looking forward to the next chapter! The plot is intriguing and original, and I love the focus you put on divination and dreams. Tiffany seems a bit suspicious to me, but I honestly have no idea where you're taking this story, but can't wait to see more of albus and arabella!Author's Response: aw thank you so much! haha, currently smiling like crazy - give me a moment ;)
i'm so glad you liked it! it's actually so much fun writing the characters, they're so hilarious to work with (especially jade, there's SO MUCH to do with her personality, it's crazy.) and i'm glad you like the plot too!
don't worry, everything should be cleared up very soon, and to be honest, i really can't wait to start revealing everything!
oh and tiffany's one to look out for too, that's all ;) x Report Review
I.don't.like.jade.at.all.Author's Response: ahaha, watch for her behavior later ;) x Report Review
Ahh, this is so good! Everything just seems to get more mysterious, but it's so fulfilling at the same time.
Awesome chapter! :)Author's Response: aw thank you darling! x Report Review
Oh, gosh - you have an absolute talent for writing, for showering your stories with love and emotions, for making everything seem so darn real - I cried, did you know, when Bella and Albus fought, and when Bella talked to her dad and he said not to leave her, too. I actually cried, you wrote it so beautifully. This is an amazing story, and I can't wait to see where it's going. The Glade, I love it and the idea of it, but it gives me an eerie feeling. Has Bella talked about it before? Meh, I don't know, I like the sound of it, but it totally just creeps me out for some reason. Update soon, please?Author's Response: AWW thank you so much! this is such a sweet review, and it means a ton! and i'm so sorry i made you cry, but i'm glad you liked it :)
haha, the glade will definitely be important later, i'm impressed ;) and i've just put the next chapter in the queue now, so it should be up really soon x Report Review
OUCH!!! TIFFANY JUST HAD A HUUUGGGE SPASE ATTACK. I mean i wonder where she cane up with that idea? Weird? Although u have given e something to think about. You know, if i had a beard like Dumbledore's then i would stroke it right now. Except im a girl, and i dont have a beard. Though if i did i wud be in a world records book. YEAH ME!!! AND GOODNESS, it must have been awkward for Bella when she suggested that Jade and Al get together. I mean Rose had no way of knowing but i mean like AWKWARD! And i felt so bas for her when Jade was "all over him" Id right more but i REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY, wanna read the next chapter so OFF I GO!!!Author's Response: HAHA, i love the whole beard thing, i totally get what you're saying - i get that a lot ;) haha, and i know right? poor rose, if she knew, she probably wouldn't have said anything, i'm sure
oh tiffany knows more than she's revealing, but you'll definitely find out soon enough! x Report Review
I really liked this chapter as well. Ive liked all of them. Scratch that last bit, i love all ur chapters. I really do hope Al starts to like her, but i wonder if he will. Theres a fifty-fifty chance of that happening. I wonder what will become of Arabella. And i was so sure that Bella would put up her hand for the extra credit. I mean like her dad have made sure she had taken it and would have probably been disappointed knowing that she hadnt taken up the opportunity. I was REALLY surprised a while ago when i realized she didnt like Quiddicth. I mean EVERYONE has to like Quidditch, its QUIDDITCH!!! But i like how u show that not everyone has to be on the Quidditch team. Its perfectly okay not to be. I really hope that before she gets with Al (if she does) then shell date somebody else. I just wanna see her taste in guys. Like i know Al is her main choice, but nobody else can be Al. So wanna see if she'll like anyone else. AMAZING CHAPTER! P.S. Did u notice the Rita Skeeter quote, if ya did YES!!! ITS BEEN NOTICED!!! If not, nevermindAuthor's Response: AH, which rita skeeter quote? i must've forgotten, but you should definitely remind me, i don't remember :)
and of course, there are loads of amazing wizards who couldn't play quidditch, like hermione(;
ahh thanks darling x Report Review
OMG!!! No matter how much i wanna read the next chapter, im gunna leave u a much better review. First off i love the entiire concept. Its absolutely wonderful, i mean like how many stories do u find where the guy doesnt automatically like the firl back? Not to many. I find aboslutely awful how mean her father is. My parents are a lot like that but i dont think they ever ask my teachers hiw exactly im doing... But of course it adds to the interest. And it wouldnt be interesting if it was like all the other stories, even though i quite like cliche stories, i dont always like the concept. Well it was still quite a short review but it was better than the last... OFF TO READ THE NEXTAuthor's Response: exactly my thoughts! i didn't want al to start off liking bella cause personally, i didn't feel like that was realistic and i wanted these relationships to be relatable :)
aw i know, her dad does come across as really strict, but you'll see - he does care about her :) thanks so much for the review! x Report Review
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