Reading Reviews for Slytherin Career Day
49 Reviews Found

Review #26, by Courtney Dark A Long Day in the Dungeons

9th January 2013:
Oh my goodness, this was hilarious! I can honestly say it was one of the funniest things I have read in a long time. Most of the Snape fics that I have read have been very dark and serious so the humour in this was a nice change.

You characterization of Snape was spot on. I loved his reactions to each and every one of his students, and the little comments he wrote down...genius. I think my favourite was 'my bad.' I just started laughing so hard-it seemed exactly the type of thing Snape would say!

I think my favourite interview would have to be Zabini's. I was giggling all throughout with this big, cheesy smile plastered on my face. I think my favourite line was: 'You know what they say, if the broomís been around the pitch a few times, at least you know it flies.' The way Snape reacted to each one of Zabini's Just wow.

Everything about this one-shot was perfect, and I think the last line just summed it all up perfectly. Great job!

Author's Response: Hi!

I really, really enjoyed writing this. Most of what I write tends to be darker, more dramatic stuff, so it was fun to just write something funny.

Snape has actually always been pretty easy for me to write. Alan Rickman's portrayal left such a strong presence in my mind. His dialog just flows for me.

Zabini's section was actually the first one that I wrote, and I liked it so much that I saved it for last.

I'm really glad that you enjoyed it! Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #27, by Santa's Little Helper A Long Day in the Dungeons

3rd January 2013:
Yeah, I'm not the big guy himself, but I'm here to give you some reviews, because I really like your fics and have never gotten around to review many of them. So let's begin. :)

Oh goodie! I love funny Snape stories. His sarcastic quips are one of my favorite things in canon. I can't actually figure out why I haven't written about him yet myself, since he's so intriguing personality. Anyways, I'm really happy to inform you, that you got his drier-than-desert humour and his inimitable character down to pat.

It's good thing to know, that at least some of Snape's pores produce more than grease, even if it's sweat that mildews socks. Although, that sounds a pretty unfortunate condition as well. :P His snide thoughts about Harry's preferred future occupation being half deity definitely hit the target. *snigger* Those two had such a tumultuous relationship.

The mere idea that Snape has to guide Slytherins every year to some kind of meaningful career is simply put laughable. I guess there must be an oddball there every once in a while, who actually has plans to his future (like the world domination), but with all that inbreeding, hereditary stupidness is inescapable as proven with Gaunts.

Crabbe torched his sister? Wow, he's a creep and a half. Pansy's ambition to become next mistress of the Malfoy manor is so spot on. Sadly I know some girls who could give her run for her money with such ambitions. It's pretty disturbing.

Goyle is so cute when he needs Malfoy to help him with career plans. I could actually see him ending up as a butler in the Malfoy manor. I bet he would fit there like a glove. Unless, of course, he keeps eating sand from the driveway. I bet Narcissa wouldn't put up with that. :P

Draco's Hair Solution for dandruff and bald patches would be an instant bestseller. I can guarantee it. :) Poor Snape tries to filch the biggest secret that the Malfoys ever had; how to keep hair shinier than the silver spoons they were born with. Teehee.

Oh dear Daphne. Yes, she will do so well in the Malfoy manor. She can shop all day, and when she comes home each evening, she and Draco can braid each others hair. Quite a perfect solution. :)

Zabini's scene made made me giggle quite a lot. My favorite line: 'You're thinking of breeding dogs?' *snort* Poor unbelieving Snape. And high-mileage birds! Oh lord.

Darling Minnie. She's right, her life is basically dancing among roses compared to Sevvie here. :P Excellent ending, so excellent.

Your dialogue and the characters were perfect for subject at hand. I've rarely seen such a good parody, and it would be lovely read more of those, if you just get ideas for them. 'Little pure blood snowflake' should be pure-blood, but otherwise your writing was smooth and very enjoyable to read.

Wow, this must be the longest review I have ever written. Well, it's only fair, you've left me some too. :)


Santa's Little Helper

Author's Response: Hello, there, Little Helper! Thanks so much for volunteering to step in and help out. It really means a lot! :hug:

If you love Snape's sarcastic quips, you've come to the right place. Honestly, I'm not a big fan of the character. Snape/Lily stories make me cringe. But there's something about writing him in his full, snide, bitter glory that gives me a thrill. It's my guilty pleasure.

I enjoyed writing each of the Slytherin kids in turn, although I think Crabbe and Zabini were my favorites. I wrote Zabini's section first, but I liked it so much I decided to save it for the end. The idea of making Crabbe a pyro was easy enough based on what happened in DH, but the reference to his sister popped into my head while writing this and I was literally giggling as I wrote it.

Gah. I hate the term "pureblood". I'm never quite sure whether to split it up, smush it together, hyphenate it... It's a pain!

It seems that you're dropping subtle little hints as to your identity. I shall have to ruminate on this...

Once again, thank you so much for stepping in where others didn't do their part. I really, really appreciate it!

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Review #28, by patronus_charm A Long Day in the Dungeons

17th December 2012:
I LOVED THIS STORY!! I never thought of how the career interviews went from someone else perspective as I just thought of them as some minor sub-plot but, this story was great it made me laugh the whole way through. I have to say my favourite 2 were Pansy and Daphne as both of them were exactly what I imagined pure blooded people to be like. You should definitly write more stories like this from Snape's perspective as he is a really funny person to read :D

Author's Response: Hi!

I'm really glad that you liked it. It was mountains of fun to write. I have a few ideas for humorous stories. Maybe one or two will get done before the queue reopens.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #29, by Pixileanin A Long Day in the Dungeons

14th December 2012:
On the sixth day of Christmas...

...and people ask ME where I get my cracked up ideas from...

This fic was sheer brilliance from start to finish. I'm afraid I had to stop reading several times, just to get a chance to breathe, I was laughing so hard. Everything you wrote about Snape was great, from the potential mildewey socks to sulking in the corner during the faculty meeting.

"The entire house was constructed on a self-perpetuating foundation of privilege, arrogance and a powerful aversion to any activity that bore a resemblance to honest work."

Ahh, Slytherins. How we love to loathe them.

Crabbe was precious. "Mr. Crabbe, you don't have a sister." Just awesome. Pansy's single-minded career path was an over-the-top hopeless case. Even if Snape had cared to help her out, I'm not sure it would have done much good.

Draco's secret desire and Snape's thoughts on taking the opportunity to humiliate his father was utterly brilliant. I can totally see Draco doing that type of work and loving every minute (and Snape cashing in on the side... the perfect setup!).

I was pretty sure you couldn't top that if you tried, but then you included Daphne, who had it all together until Snape pointed it out to her. "My bad" had me in stitches. And Mr. Zambini stole the show. I'm not going to quote any lines from that section because then I'd have to pick one and they were all equally brilliant.

I can easily picture Snape gritting his teeth through all of these interviews and scribbling those snarky comments in the margins of his notes, if only to keep sane.

I don't know what you put in your pumpkin juice the day you wrote this, but whatever it was, you may want to save the recipe.

Author's Response: I love Christmas! Good friends, good food and cool stuff from pix.

So I'll admit it: I had more fun writing this than just about anything else I've ever written. I usually canon-police myself so hard when I write. But in this case, I just turned it loose and let my imagination run wild. It was a joy.

Poor Crabbe. It wasn't hard at all to figure out what to do with him. Giving him pyromaniac tendencies was a slam dunk after the way he managed to get himself killed. And Pansy is just a hopelessly smitten schoolgirl, so I didn't try to make any more of her than that.

I've always tended to think that Snape hated Lucius and secretly hated Draco, as well. So having him make the most of an opportunity to use Draco as a means of further hurting Lucius made all the sense in the world.

Zabini's section was actually the first one I wrote. I have to assume that Hogwarts has its share of players, and he's definitely the type.

I don't know what I was drinking when I wrote this, but it all ended well. Thank you for another awesome review!

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Review #30, by WitnesstoitAll A Long Day in the Dungeons

24th November 2012:
I just wanted to take a moment to leave you a quick review for this story! I adored everything about this: snape's voice was spot on (especially the bits where he'd write comments by each of the student's names), your comedic timing was impeccable, your exagerated characterizaton of the slytherin house had me in stitches, and the last line really served to tie it all together. This was such a creative and well written one shot!! I'm so glad that you wrote it and that I took the time to read it!! Reading this reminds me how little of your work I've actually read, and what a shame that is!! I do hope to make some more time in the future!

Author's Response: Hi, there!

This was one of the most fun things I've ever written. There's so much snark to tap into when you write Snape and to be quite honest about it, I'm a pretty snarky person. I'm really glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #31, by MissMdsty A Long Day in the Dungeons

20th November 2012:
Hey there! Tagging you from the review thread!

I really liked the humor of this story and the characters you set out with are perfectly uncompatible. You have Snape on one side, a talented wizard, a skilled potions master and a very dark and angsty person and the House of Slyherin, composed of Malfoy, Malfoy wannabes and spoiled princesses. That's a perfect storm if I ever saw one.

My favorite line in all of this is On days like this one, Severus felt like snatching the Sorting Hat from Dumbledoreís shelf and laughing maniacally while he watched it burn. . I think we've all had days like this one. :)

Out of all the students, I enjoyed Daphne and Blaise the most, mainly because I love the name Daphne and the career she chose, for me seems to go perfectly with the way I imagined her.

And Blaise is just so funny, I could almost imagine Snape's fac when he made the comment about the... erm... wand and cauldron.

And McGonagall's last line was just the perfect ending!

Good job on this, I really enjoyed it!

Author's Response: Hi, there!

Sorry to take such a long time to respond. Anyway, I'm really glad you enjoyed this. It was a mountain of fun to write. I think you got the characterization of Slytherin House just about right. Salazar would be spinning in his grave.

I don't often feel sympathy for Snape, but this was one of those occasions. Blaise was far and away the most fun section to write, although Crabbe was a close second. Blaise was actually the first section I wrote, and then I filled in the rest.

I'm really pleased that McGonagall's closing line worked for you. It felt like such a throwaway to me. :-/

Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #32, by kayt A Long Day in the Dungeons

15th November 2012:
Oh, that was funny, especially Crabbe - fire, like having a pet - and Goyle's sections. Made me laugh out loud. And Snape's sarcastic thoughts were brilliant.

Author's Response: See, Crabbe and Goyle are good for something!

This story was a blast to write and I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #33, by Phoenix_feather123 A Long Day in the Dungeons

12th November 2012:

OMG, I thought this was really funny and great. I loved this one shot and I wished it was longer.

Keep writing and I might check out your other stories.

Author's Response: So I really have to wonder, did you actually read the story?

Thanks anyway.

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Review #34, by shadowcat2 A Long Day in the Dungeons

3rd November 2012:
I am so glad I came across your author's page today. I absolutely loved this one-shot. You took Slytherin humour to another level. I couldn't stop laughing. It's amazing how you manage to keep everything canon in every story. I think you portrayed each character perfectly. Thank you for making me smile!

Author's Response: :)

I'm really glad you enjoyed it. This piece was mountains of fun to write.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #35, by adluvshp A Long Day in the Dungeons

1st November 2012:
Here for review tag!

Haha this was an entertaining story. I liked how you showed what different slytherin students wanted - it was all fitting. I literally laughed out loud at Draco's admission though, haha. And I liked Crabbe's fascination with fire - that was a good idea there. Pansy made me gag, and Blaise and Daphne were hilarious as well. I did feel sorry for Snape, and McGonagall's end comment was priceless.

I think, all in all, you wrote one nice story that could make anyone smile and giggle. Good job!



Author's Response: Hi, there!

I'm glad that you enjoyed the story. It was fun to write.

Thanks for reading and reviewing.

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Review #36, by zipzin A Long Day in the Dungeons

28th October 2012:
Must say that I love the last line of this story! That really made it from a pretty good story to a great one! Amazing how things can do that. However, the rest of the story was very good and I love seeing it from a Snape point of view that seems fairly realistic. Excellent story none the less, but that last line really is gold!

Author's Response: Hi! I'm really glad that you enjoyed it. Thanks for taking a moment to review!

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Review #37, by charm_the_stag A Long Day in the Dungeons

28th October 2012:
I love the way this started. Severus Snape's usual surly mood! Nicely described, even how he perceived Slytherin students to be.
I thought the career day thing happened before their O.W.L's.
Other than that, Ooh Crabbe's affinity for fire! That was fun to read. You have portrayed Snape wonderfully.
I laughed a lot! It earned quite a few questioning looks from my family. My brother just thought I'd gone mad and he stalked off.
ďYouíre going to think Iím mental, but... You see, itís... Iíve always wanted to style peopleís hair.Ē
This line made me lose it. Hahahahahaha.
It was really really good and you made me laugh A LOT! It was a brilliant one-shot. All the characters were portrayed really well and you had me hooked.
10/10 =D

Author's Response: Hi, there!

I have to admit, this was the most fun I've had writing something in a long time. Turning on the snark tap and just letting it run was cathartic in a way, after writing so much serious, angsty, mushy stuff for HPFF.

As far as when career day happened, I don't know, maybe McGonagall was more on the ball than Snape? She certainly had more to look forward to, after all. ;)

I'm really glad you enjoyed the story. Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!

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Review #38, by ValWitch21 A Long Day in the Dungeons

24th October 2012:
I've just reread this and realised - wait, I didn't review?!

This story had me in tears on the floor, tears of laughter mind you, but I think that much is obvious.

This was so funny, all of your characters are so believable! I think my absolute favourites are Zabini and Goyle though... Throwing rocks at the Giant Squid, eating sand, and being a complete womaniser in the worst way possible? I think yes.

I'm also very impressed by how radically different your stories are, and yet how flawless they both are (I've only read CoB and this so far, but something tells me that is going to change soon).

Directly to my favourites, without a doubt!


Author's Response: Hi, there!

I'm glad you enjoyed it. It was a lot of fun to write. The idea came from a very innocuous line in the story it's dedicated to. From there, it was imagination running wild.

Goyle and Zabini were two of my favorite sections to write, although Crabbe was way up there, too.

I'm really glad that you enjoyed the story! Thanks for taking a minute to review!

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Review #39, by caoty A Long Day in the Dungeons

24th October 2012:
Well, here I am, since you asked. I keep saying that just in case you get sick of me constantly criticising you and get all, "Who the hell asked you for your opinion anyway?" and then I can reply, "YOU!" But anyway.

Okay. So. Snape is perfectly in character and relatable, which shouldn't be possible, but you've managed it. I've got no clue how. Honestly. Teach me your ways, Dan.

Crabbe is my favourite by far because I like my humour like I like my coffee/metal/chocolate/women, and "Mr. Crabbe, you donít have a sister," was funny as hell. Followed closely by Blaise, because that's just absurd and I would pay actual money to see that conversation happen IRL.
Snape's notes on each student were also pretty spot on.

I'm impressed by the range of humour you've managed through these little interviews: you've gone from black to snarky to LOLshallowpeople to LOLstupidpeople to Blaise to the sitcom-style ending. For someone who's known more for postwar action/angst fic, you've done alright.

I wouldn't say I was crying with laughter or anything - the only HP fic that could do that is The Shoebox Project, though, and that's like the Holy Grail of Marauder fic - but it did make me smile, so thank you, and good luck with your challenge. :)

Author's Response: I did! I did ask you for your opinion. Because it's important to me. I need to know precisely what you're thinking about this story, in case your thoughts happen to spur THE epiphany that leads me to write the Great American Novel. Then I'll retire to a palatial mountain estate and spend the rest of my days sipping fine wine from crystal goblets and surfing the Internet for amusing pictures of other people's pets. I'd probably even give you a shout-out in the preface. Do you prefer Mr. caoty, Ms. caoty or Dr. caoty? For the latter, please specify MD, PhD or witch doctor.

Why were we here again? Oh, yes, your review. I'm not sure I can teach anyone else to write Snape because I just hear his voice inside my head sometimes when I'm writing. That really comes in handy when I'm writing a story like this one or the first chapter of Marked. It's far less useful when I'm writing my morning market commentary at work. And it can be downright detrimental at times, like when I was writing our family Christmas letter last year. Grandma sure wasn't impressed...

Crabbe's story is one that I think we can all relate to because really, who hasn't accidentally killed a sibling with dark magic? It's as universal as putting gum in their hair or blurting out embarrassing bed-wetting stories during their high school graduation party. Conservatively, I would pay about $500 to see a video of Alan Rickman and Louis Cordice acting out that scene. Although maybe it's already up on youtube somewhere. Honestly, I haven't looked.

Range is crucial for a writer. It's what differentiates the good ones from Stephanie Meyer. I felt like every character needed their own spin. They're all unique. That's what makes them fun.

I'm glad you got a grin out of it. It was a load of fun to write and it carried an idea that I'd had for a while through to fruition. Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!

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Review #40, by PhoenixPulse A Long Day in the Dungeons

16th October 2012:
Hello there!

So I thought after reading and favouriting, it was only fair to also leave you a little review. And Let me tell you, this was just way to uh-may-zing for words!

I love how you characterized all the Slytherin students and each one had their own "unique" personal conversation with Snape. Now coming to think of it, I wonder how Career Advice Day went in OOTP for the Slytherins. This was a very original take upon things indeed!

I also just love how with each student, they keep getting worse and worse.

Crabbe was just bad with him and his pyromaniac ways. I love how you had him zone out for a while. And I love Goyle in this as well, relying on the existince of Crabbe and Malfoy to get somewhere in life. Them two goons! And Malfoy...I don't think I need to comment about how I feel towards him. His obsession for his father's hair had me choking on my juice pouch, which let me tell you, is a rather hard thing for me to do when reading.

But of course, my favorite part to this was Blaise. I love how he was so blunt with what he said, and the nerve he had to talk to Snape like that. True swagger right there!

I personally can say that you made me love every single one of these characters through this one-shot. You depicted them greatly, and I fear I have no more words to say. Your writing is lovely and flows so smoothly, and I'm just jealous about everything right now. The humor genre is definately your thing, and I admire how well you pulled something like this off. It's amazing!

Thank you for a great read! :D

Author's Response: Hi, there. I'm so pleased that you enjoyed the story. It was a mountain of fun to write.

The idea for this came from a fairly innocuous line in the story that this is dedicated to. But when I read it, I had an instant reaction. "Snape giving career advice to the students of Slytherin House? That would be hilarious!"

I took a bit of inspiration from various places for each of the students. Crabbe is fairly obvious, since he eventually kills himself with Fiendfyre. Goyle is just a follower, without an original thought in his head. For Draco, the idea of him secretly wanting to be a hairdresser was a combination of a movie that I sadly can't remember anything else about, including the title, and a comment made by my dear friend Deeds on HPFF about how she was always in awe of Lucius's hair.

Zabini... that one was just fun. Obviously, he never really has a conversation like that with Snape in a million years, but once I got rolling I just couldn't stop myself. If anything, I was channeling a bit of Tiger Woods as he's portrayed by Donald Glover.

Thanks so much for reading and taking a moment to review!

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Review #41, by spontaneous A Long Day in the Dungeons

15th October 2012:
This was absolutely hilarious! I loved it. You got Snape spot-on and still managed to make me laugh so much. Is it even possible for me to tell you in words how perfect this was?

Draco's desire to style hair for a living and Daphne. Oh, poor, misguided Daphne. You're an absolute genius.


"Normally I don't go for the high-milage birds, but I could make a few exceptions. You know what they say, if the broom's been around the pitch a few times, at least you know it flies."

I can't even-

Just... This was amazing. Instant favorite.

Author's Response: Hi!

I'm really glad that you enjoyed it. This was a lot of fun to write.

Zabini... well, I don't think there's one chance in a million that conversation really happens, but I got going on it and I enjoyed it so much I couldn't stop. :D

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!

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Review #42, by Roots in Water A Long Day in the Dungeons

15th October 2012:
First of all, I'm sorry I'm so late getting around to reviewing this! I did see your note but I wanted to wait to read it until I could actually give you a proper review (though this review may be more gushing than anything else...).

Gah! Let me just say that I loved this story so much! I love humour that plays off people's perceptions and interactions with other people and you did a brilliant job with this here.

Even better, your characterizations of them were believable! You didn't make up anything about them that was unusual or out of the ordinary for them- you just wrote with Snape's natural mindset.

I loved Crabbe's section (well, I loved all of the sections but we'll start with him for now). Snape's comment about how he had only escaped the fate of being the worst potions student he had ever taught by grace of Goygle was very nicely done. In particular I liked how you wrote about Crabbe's fascination with fire- it makes a nice hint about his future incident with Fiendfyre (is that how you spell it?). And the comment about his sister... Is he that insane or that dangerous?

Pansy's section was perfect as well. I think that you did a brilliant job of capturing her here, at this age. Snape's comment next to her name was a wonderful addition (his comments for all of them were). And was that a slight reference to my story that I saw when you mentioned her living with an ugly dog?

Goyle's absolute cluelessness about everything and his reliance on Malfoy (and then Crabbe) to know what to do was beautifully executed (I think that I'm running out of adjectives and adverbs to use... Oh well...). And then Draco's desire to become a hairdresser! How on earth did you come up with that? It's such a hilarious notion!

Blaise's straight-up answer to Snape's question made me laugh. He's so blunt about his future plans, even though it's so obviously wrong in the eyes of society. Yes, Minerva has it right: you truly do have to pity Severus. He's stuck with such an awful (but at the same time pitifully funny) group of teenagers.

All in all, I think that you did a fantastic job with this story. I absolutely loved it (if I haven't made that clear already) and I thank you for writing this. It's actually amazing that this hilarious story sprouted from the rather more serious story of Wilted Flower but I'm glad that it did.

Author's Response: Ugh. Apologies for taking so long to respond in turn. I took the weekend off from fan fic to orchestrate my wife's birthday party and things really piled up.

I am so glad that you liked this. That was the point, after all, and the original idea was so much fun that I felt like I really needed to do it justice. I went into this with a goal of trying to keep the characters mostly true to their book characterizations (where they exist, anyway) while placing them in a ridiculous situation. I think I was mostly successful. Some of it was over-the-top, but I think that's what makes it fun.

Crabbe... yeah, he's creepy. He was one of the ones that I had no idea what to do, really. I just started writing and suddenly the idea popped into my head and by the time I was done I was absolutely in love with it. The mishap with his sister was an accident inasmuch as I'm sure he didn't *mean* for the bewitched fire to kill her. And his family, being proper pure bloods, hushed the whole thing up.

Ah, Pansy. I just tried to make her as single-minded as possible. And, yes, the ugly little dog is my tip-of-the-hat to Astor.

Goyle was pretty easy to write. The guy has never been anything but a follower, and a pretty dumb one at that. Draco's career ambition came from a comment my dear friend Deeds made a long time ago. She said that she was always fascinated by and envious of Lucius's hair. She felt bad for him in DH because his hair looks so ragged that she thought that Voldemort took all of his product away. So it was a short leap from there, and it's totally out of character for Draco, which made it a lot of fun.

Zabini... OK, obviously this conversation never happens in reality. Not in a million years. But it was so much fun to write. I just got going and I couldn't stop myself.

Like I said, I'm so incredibly pleased that you like it. This challenge has been awesome, actually, inasmuch as it's allowed me to do some really fun things to say "thanks" to the people who supported me along the way while I was writing CoB. And thank you for reading and reviewing!

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Review #43, by PsychicallySpeaking A Long Day in the Dungeons

13th October 2012:
Hello! I'm sure you recognize me from the Review Tag, but I decided to repay your favor with a review of my own. And so I found this one-shot.

Now, usually I'm not a big fan of one-shots, and I tend to avoid them whenever possible. However, seeing as this was your most recent fanfiction, I decided that you'd probably want me to review this, instead of some old, completed novel from last year.

I have to say, I'm quite happy to have made that decision. I loved the whole idea of this fanfiction, and it fits Snape's personality spot on.

I loved the beginning, where Snape laments over the day that is yet to come, I loved the middle where Snape talks to all his students, and most of all I loved the ending, with what I call the "fiction punch-line". I couldn't have thought of a better way to end this myself.

Out of all the bits presented, the one I enjoyed reading most was the one about Draco. You know, I was thinking it would be something along the lines of fashion design, but hair styling turned out even better!

Daphne's section was also very ingenious - it made me laugh that you managed to make even THAT a problem for Snape. And of course, there's the fact that I might have to start considering "shopping" a future career choice now... ;)

Out of all the parts, the one I liked least was when you introduced Blaise, probably because I could never imagine a student admitting that to their teacher, and some what getting away with it. Maybe make it a little less... amoral? :)

Well, to sum it all up, I have to say that this was a great one-shot! I really have only one complaint - why didn't you make it longer?! ;)

Author's Response: Hi, there.

I'm not usually a big fan of writing one-shots, either. But this was written for a challenge and I especially enjoyed the subject matter. Sometimes you have to just write fun things to recharge a bit in between your bigger projects.

I'm glad that you thought Snape sounded like himself. I really wanted to try to place all of the canon characters into a really humorous situation but keep them at least mostly realistic to the way they were written (if they were written) in the books.

I have to give my friend Deeds a lot of credit for my career choice for Draco. She was always fascinated with Lucius's hair, and somewhere along the way I think it just started me thinking about it.

Poor Daphne. She's just not all that bright. Yet she stumbles across a fairly workable idea through no fault of her own and still manages to blow it in the end.

Zabini's section was just a flight of fancy on my part. It was fun to write, even if it wasn't very realistic. So if you didn't enjoy it, well, I think I enjoyed it enough for both of us. :D

I'm glad that you enjoyed this, because I definitely enjoyed your story. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #44, by Jchrissy A Long Day in the Dungeons

11th October 2012:
Bah I canít believe I am 6th! 6th! Pah. Anyway!

I want to start with how much I love how Severus canít even deny how much Slytherin sucks at this point. Or particularly his group of Slytherins, haha. And now! I will NEVER shake the idea of Severus running around like a maniac, screaming like a psycho and cackling like a witch over a cauldron. Not a harry potter style witch, like a wart nose witch.

Crabbe Crabbe Crabbe. That may have been one of the most humorous, while being disturbing, things Iíve ever read. His sister! His sister! Thatís terrible. But heís so dumb that you kind of just want to pat him on the head and say Ďbless your heartí in the Southern style way that is meant as nothing but an insult while using sweet words. Except Iíll make sure that we are far away from any flames.

So I have to admit, I have absolutely scribbled my name besides Ben way before we were engaged. Itís girl thing. A creepy girl thing, but a girl thing.†And youíve taken that small trait but used it to show how absolutely mental and out of touch with reality Pansy is.

When Severus asks if this is some kind of joke we really see the extent of her obsession slash I JUST WANT TO BE MRS. DRACO MALFOY craziness. It doesnít even cross her mind that heís mocking what sheís doing. Just that the name isnít quite right. I think Pansy is one of those characters that you can almost do anything with. Nothing is out of bounds with this poor girl, but this is just awesome because it really fits in her creepy stalker sense, and just strengthens the image of the girl adoringly rubbing Dracoís silvery locks as he rest in her lap. She might as well have been fanning him and feeding him grapes.

And Snape starts his session out with his own little jab that toward Goyle about Graduating about talking optimistically. But heís so stupid that it just goes right over his head. I would kill to be in Severus position right now, haha. It would be the kind of memories that can make anyone chuckle for a lifetime. Well, not Snape, because itís Snape.

Dracoís section. Please, can you just write something else now about Draco and Snape trying to create the perfect Potion that Lucius uses, maybe add in some sneaky things that they do to follow Lucius around to figure out it all, and I will be forever grateful. You have no idea how much this story makes me smile, and this is far from my first read through, but itís still making me laugh. Who knew you were so awesome at humor? ;).

Daphneís section has officially killed me. Snapeís little scribble next to her name just pushed it over the edge and made all he difference. And Daphne is not someone I want to anger after her little ending sentence!

I have no idea if thereís so kind of Blaise canon about his mother that Iím not aware of, or if everything about his mother comes from your head, but my favorite part was how well it tied in with CoB. It reminded me of the ministry scene with Hermione pretending to be her, and it was just an awesome flashback.

Seriously Dan, I am in awe about how great you pulled this story off. It could have so easily turned into something that was not enough or too much, but itís perfect. The dry humor, the personalities that you didnít even really have to amplify to bring out that kind of comedy, you are awesome. Now when I have bad days and tell you that you have to cheer me up, Iíll know your true talent and expect a little mini funny story ;).

As always, amazing ♥

Author's Response: OK, enough is enough. I've been staring at this all day, trying to think of a witty, clever way to respond. Or at least something that doesn't sound dumb. As it turns out, I'm drawing a complete blank. I think I used up all my wit in this story. I'll have to go write a bunch of sad, angst-ridden, post-war fiction to recharge.

I never got the impression that Severus especially loved his own house, he just hated the others much more. He's a thoroughly miserable individual, and he passes on few opportunities to share that misery with the world. Combine that with the fools that he's forced to suffer and I just can't imagine him behaving any other way.

Yeah, that's pretty much the reaction I was going for with Crabbe. It's fairly obvious where I got the idea to make him a firebug, but you know me, I couldn't just leave it at that. Creepy kids give me the willies, but they're an almost inexhaustible source of humor. He's the type of dumb bully who really doesn't stand a chance in the real world, where he isn't allowed to resolve problems with his fists. Bless his heart.

I think every young girl with a crush has engaged in that at some point or another, but I hope Pansy came across as taking it to a pretty absurd extreme. As in, this is really the only thing she came to Snape's career counseling session prepared to discuss. She has no Plan B. It's Draco or Spinster-hood. And since we all know how Draco's life ends up, you have your answer by process of elimination.

If I was going to take the idea of Draco doing hair and really run with it, I think there are two possible directions that would be even more fun. One would be the conversation he might have with his father. Lucius might just die from sheer humiliation. The other, which seems even funnier to me, is Draco bullying Crabbe and Goyle into being his test subjects. I think the potential of that idea is off the charts.

I have a lot of headcanon built up around both Blaise and Daphne, considering that they're both such minor characters in the books and movies. It's interesting that the story of Zabini's mother and her 7 husbands is told in much greater detail -- particularly the "mysterious" circumstances of their deaths -- in the HP Wiki than in the HP Lexicon. Could be a case of people's headcanon sneaking into the reference material. At any rate, both agree that she married 7 times and that her deceased husbands left her with a lot of gold, referencing chapter 7 of HBP. And I tried to keep them consistent to what is portrayed in CoB, because that just made it fun for me.

I really don't wander into humor too often, so I'm very glad that you enjoyed it. Given the number of reviews and random readings it seems to be attracting, maybe I should do it more often. Thanks so much for another awesome, encouraging review! Until next time...

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Review #45, by Cleopatraa A Long Day in the Dungeons

11th October 2012:
I really think your summary is brilliant. Just brilliant! But I would recommend a banner seeing lots of readers donít even tend to look at stories without a banner.

Like the summary I found this story brilliant. I never thought I would feel bad for Severus Snape. Aww poor guy. I can imagine it would be hard on that specific day with spoiled pureblood children. What I noticed was that you skipped two students: Theodore Nott and Milicent Bulstrode (SP?).

It was kinda scary that Crabbe had a sister who he apparently killed and Snape didnít hear of. Makes you wonder what happens in those pureblood families. I really could imagine Pansy saying that. I think her goal/career is going to be marrying a rich man who can take care of her so I liked the fact you had a similar idea. I liked Dracoís idea and the fact he thought it was mental. After all everyone wants something or does something other people could find plain weird. Whaha poor Snape. He had a student who had a career in mind and he ruined it. Though I always had the idea Daphne was more ambitious and smarter but for this story it works.

I really liked this!

Author's Response: Hi, there!

I already have one banner request in at TDA for a different story, but I'm planning on requesting for this one when that's complete. I don't completely agree with the notion that people ignore stories without banners, though. I only added banners to my main story very recently and I didn't notice any difference in the rate at which people read it.

I'm not sure I want you to feel badly for Snape, but I'm not upset if you do. He's not generally a sympathetic character, but you have to feel for him a bit in this situation. The students in his house don't have much of an idea what it means to work for a living.

I didn't include Nott, Millicent or Tracey Davis because honestly I couldn't think of anything funny to write about them. They're non-entities in the books for the most part. So is Daphne, actually, but since her sister marries Draco I do have a bit of headcanon built up around her.

I'm glad you liked the way I characterized the different students.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #46, by Remus A Long Day in the Dungeons

11th October 2012:
Hello! :D Finally made it this way!

I had to come read this one first because I know that you can write the character of Draco very well. And I'm in a Snape sort of mood so I figured this will be the first story I R/R today. :)

Within the first paragraph, you were able to capture Snape from the book. His moodiness, his hatred of anything that may bring people happiness...I literally went 'eww' about the part of mildew and his socks. :S

You know, Crabbe being a Pyromaniac doesn't surprise me one bit. It would explain why all of the sudden he wanted to play with Fiendfyre. He's not a smart human being so its not like he would know about it unless he really had an interest. I find it rather chilling that he had a sister that he apparently killed and not even Snape knew about her. Most likely a younger sister. Either way, I'm starting to wonder what sort of life he had a home...the questions I have now about the parents and what they might've thought...Ugh, if you end up giving me a plot bunny I'm not going to be happy, sir! :O

You seriously have me laughing with the descriptions Snape gave each student. My favorite had to be Pansy's and Daphne's. Another thing I liked was how this young Daphne sounds like the older Daphne we saw in CoB. You're keeping to your own personal canon if you know what I mean.

Basing all of your future hopes and dreams on the fleeting affections of another person can be a tragic and costly mistake.--That has got to be the best advice anyone can give. And its true, honestly. But try making a teenager girl understand that. Haha

And Draco as a hair stylist...that would be interesting. Haha!

"So, Mr. Zabini, in what discipline would you say that your interests lie?

(not sure if I can have that word in a review...)

Anyway, I laughed. I laughed so hard! I was definitely NOT expecting that one at all! Actually, the whole Zabini conversation had me laughing.

The end with Minerva was seriously the cherry on top with this fic. I could already picture Snape giving Minerva a cold look while Dumbledore tries his best to hide a smile. You seriously have a talent for humor. This was definitely a great read!


Author's Response: Hi, Rosie!

If you're in a Snape sort of mood, well, you've come to the right place! This story has more Snape than you can shake a stick at. Angry Snape. Snarky Snape. Disgusted Snape. Intrigued Snape. This story has it all!

Ah, Crabbe. Zabini's section was the most fun to write, but I think that Crabbe's might have turned out just a bit better. The idea of making him a firebug has a very obvious inspiration, and once I got started I just couldn't stop. I didn't really think about whether his sister was older or younger, dead or merely injured to the point of disability, it just seemed like an incredibly dark detail to layer onto the big oaf. Anyway, I'm glad you liked him, and I think his home life was probably kind of white-bread suburbia except for the sister they don't discuss. :-P

Daphne didn't change much between the two stories, did she? I cannot shed the idea of her being this vapid, shallow, stupid girl who thinks that she's much smarter than she really is.

Snape's little piece of advice to Pansy was my one moment of sliding into something serious and a bit grim. But I think it adds. Severus is, after all, not a happy man.

Yeah, you definitely cannot put that word in a review, so I'm glad you stopped yourself. Like I said, Zabini's section was far and away the most fun to write. I was giggling like a schoolgirl to myself.

I'm so glad you enjoyed it. I'm starting to think maybe I should write humor more often. People seem to like me better when I'm funny.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #47, by TenthWeasley A Long Day in the Dungeons

11th October 2012:
I dropped by this story on the recommendation of Toujours Padfoot, presumably on either the premise that I adore Snape (which is true), or that I would find it amusing (which is also true). I must tell you that I thoroughly enjoyed reading this story, too!

You have a near-impeccable writing style, something that is fantastic to see; it makes reading a story that much easier, and the whole piece flows very nicely. I love the subject you chose, too. We see Harry's being advised by McGonagall in canon, but I've never even given thought to other scenarios of the same, especially from other Houses. And you managed to inject such humor in this, too -- it's fantastic!

I found myself looking forward to the end of every section, just to see what Snape was going to write next to the student's name. I think my favorite student you portrayed was Goyle, and now I'm laughing in the middle of government lecture just remembering it. He and Crabbe really can't think for themselves, can they? And Snape writing my bad next to Daphne's name was absolutely hysterical. You really, really have a gift for humor writing!

Thanks so much for writing this story -- I really, really enjoyed reading it, and I think it's great that you're writing so many stories for other people! Absolutely fantastic job. And I feel that you should know that I've been meaning to read Harry Potter and the Conspiracy of Blood for quite some time now -- I have a long list of fan fictions to eventually approach, but it's definitely on that list. And now, after reading this, I'm very, very excited to get to it, just because now it's been confirmed that you are an immensely talented author.

Congratulations on your Dobby Award, and once again -- great job here! :) Cannot tell you how much I enjoyed this story!

Author's Response: Hi, there!

I'll have to thank Sarah for that!

I try really hard to keep my writing tidy and error-free, so I'm really glad that you found it an easy read. Nothing ruins a great idea faster than sloppy writing, in my opinion.

This is my first journey into humorous writing on HPFF, so I'm pleased as can be that you thought it turned out well. It was a mountain of fun to write. The Slytherin characters have all seemed so ridiculous at various points in the books and movies, and I enjoyed starting from that point and then turning it up several notches.

Thank you so much for reading this story and reviewing it! And I really appreciate the congrats on the Dobby. It was an unexpected, happy moment. I hope you can make the time to read CoB. I'd love to know what you think!

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Review #48, by bester_jester A Long Day in the Dungeons

11th October 2012:
Haha great story. I expected it to be serious, but was pleasantly surprised. Fab work!

Author's Response: I'm really glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #49, by Toujours Padfoot A Long Day in the Dungeons

10th October 2012:
I saw this in the recently added and it immediately caught my interest, so I thought I would go ahead and read and review it now.

Oh my god. I can't. There are seriously tears in my eyes. I'm not sure how I'm going to construct a 12+ review, but I will try.

Severus's discussions with his pupils got increasingly funnier with each student, and by the time we got to Zabini and his marvelous aspirations in life, I was pretty much on the floor. -wipes eyes- Seriously, you are a comic genius!

"Normally I don't go for the high-milage birds, but I could make a few exceptions. You know what they say, if the broom's been around the pitch a few times, at least you know it flies."


And Draco being interested in styling hair...I am now envisioning him several years after the battle, with one of those hippy faux-hawks and a sequined lavender track suit, braiding diamonds into people's hair. Severus's ulterior motives there were hilarious, trying to solve his own greasy hair dilemma.

This snippet right here delighted me beyond what is reasonable:

Here he stood on the cusp of an opportunity to take the pain of Lucius Malfoy's personal hell to a whole other level and the moment was slipping away.

I laughed out loud so many times! I really love Lucius, I think because I have a tendency to love anything that's absurd, and enjoyed some mad cackling at Lucius's expense, with his masculinity or lack thereof~

What I enjoyed the most were the snide little notes Severus jotted down next to their names. Snake food, mental, human parasite. It outlined Severus's awesome dry humor. You did an excellent job emphasizing all of my favorite canon traits of his, with his sardonic attitude and the statements he designs so effortlessly in his head that completely disarm people. It was JKR's Severus Snape, but even better because it was just Snape vs. Really Dumb Slytherins. (Although the allusions to pinning your hopes on a fleeting romance being dangerous was a sobering moment for me, because of the Lily undertones).

I really, really enjoyed this! Well done. Roots in Water's very lucky to receive such a wonderful gift.

Thank you for participating in my challenge!

Author's Response: Gahhh! Can this be a review from the illustrious Sarah? The Dobby award-winning Sarah? Pardon me for a moment while I go squeee...

OK, I'm back! I'm really glad you enjoyed the humor and snark. This was a mountain of fun to write and even though it was born of a very small statement made by Roots in Wilted Flower, the idea never really left me. The potential seemed so endless, and it was great sport to just dive in and see what I could come up with.

Zabini was actually the first section that I wrote, and probably still my favorite. He's marvelously arrogant and shameless and the idea of his mother as this black widow who preys on lonely, old, rich wizards is one that I latched onto somewhere along the way and just never let go of.

The idea of Draco as a hair stylist came from a movie, but I swear I can't remember which one. All that stuck in my head was the image of some typically macho, violent, male character who suddenly has a change of lifestyle. At any rate, it was Snape's reaction that really sold me on the idea. The fact that he could see it as both a way to further torment Lucius and a solution to his own hair issues.

I do hope Roots will like it, but s/he seems to have been really busy of late, so I'm not sure when s/he'll get around to reading it. Soon, I hope.

Thanks so much for this review. It really made me feel like I accomplished what I set out to.

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