Reading Reviews for So, Listen...
  
286 Reviews Found

Review #1, by larissa_allstar May 1998

11th July 2014:
So the rest of my comment got cut off for some reason??? Sorry about that. Read the one on chapter 18 first then go here c:

I feel like you've breathed fresh air into the character of Fred and given him deserved love. You also painted a beautiful picture with Hollis and I basically died at the scenes with the quill and the daydream things. It was so... Fred for a lack of better word.

I also love the explanation for the floating birds. I'll now forever wonder if Fred ever received Hollis' parchment and if he really knew how much she cared for him and vice versa. I've never really understood the whole meaning of "tragically beautiful" and I feel as if your fic has allowed me to feel.

Thank you.

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Review #2, by larissa_allstar April 1996

10th July 2014:
Okay so I just read your last reply so even if you don't reply to this comment I hope it brings a smile to your face, as reading this fic definitely brought many to mine.

For the past two days I've been reading this story non-stop. This is my first Fred/OC story and I can definitely confirm that there needs to be more (do you have any recommendations?? I'd definitely trust your opinion). I love your Fred, he seems to be characterized brilliantly. He retains so much from the original, meanwhile you develop him realistically. He's still the great joker, but you do show moments of seriousness which I adore. I actually just connected to him on such a extreme level, the previous chapter made me cry. I actually have never cried reading a story on here yet, but this one just moved me. I could hardly read two lines before my eyes getting blurry. Then I'd have to contain myself, read two more and cry again haha. It was quite the 2 AM adventure.

I also adore you OC of Hollis. She's the perfect match for Fred and I swear she almost seemed canon with how things worked out. You made me sympathize so much with her which takes quite skill.

Fred totally deserved love and I'm so glad that you showed a version in which he did obtain that love. It was such a bittersweet journey and I loved every moment of it. As their relationship developed I couldn't help but be their personal cheerleader.Gosh, you just made the characters seem real with their writing.

I'm finding it hard to express my love for this story adequately. It's truly had a impact on me and I won't soon forget it. I swear you'd see a lot more expletives if they were allowed in this comment ahah.

Thank you so much for letting me into your mind and giving Fred his much deserved love

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Review #3, by First time reviewer April 1996

9th July 2014:
So I never review- NEVER- and I'm not sure if you still even look at this site, but I wanted to let you know that I just read this story and the Nora Prewett story and I am absolutely in love with your writing style. You articulate yourself so well and really can draw the reader into your story. This is not your average fanfiction... You really have a talent. Great work! I hope to read more from you in the future.

Author's Response: Hi there! I haven't written fanfiction in a long time, but I do pop on here every now and then and I read all of my reviews. I have so many that responding to all of them is impossible, but I wanted to respond to this one and say thank you so much for your kind words. I'm so happy that you enjoyed So, Listen... and Curious Happenings at Number Twelve. I definitely hope you keep reviewing in the future - especially reviewing authors who are still around, writing works in progress. I can't even express how encouraging it can be to get a review. Even if it's just one sentence, it's proof that someone out there is reading our work, and that can motivate us to write better and faster.

:)


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Review #4, by derf April 1996

24th April 2014:
I'm not sure if you're still active or not, but I just have to say, wow. This story was astounding; definitely one of the best Fred fics I've ever read (possibly even the absolute best one). Your writing is phenomenal. Some parts had me rolling on the floor (The Valentine's Day chapter? hilarious), and others had me in tears (why'd Rowling have to kill him? But the scene with Molly at the funeral was beautiful). I wanted so much more for Hollis and Fred; all the love and joy and romance, I couldn't help but hope they somehow got their happy ending. That being said, I'm truly a junkie for the stories that don't end happily ever after - they elicit such a broader range of emotions and seem so much more realistic than stories where everything goes right - and your ending was wonderfully bittersweet.
-Jordan

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Review #5, by 1917farmgirl September 1990

9th October 2013:
Okay, I can tell already that I'm going to be hooked on this story.

You have such a GIFT of creating characters! They are vibrant and real and jump right off the page and grab you!

And yet, you can turn around and do the same thing with your canon characters! So amazing!

There were so many things I loved about this chapter - I will try to remember them all. So here comes my fangirl list:

- Love the myths perpetuated by older siblings about Hogwarts. "Risky Swimming" hehehehe. Made me laugh.
- Loved the line about how there were a lot of pushy red-heads running around the train.
- The names you use are great! So off the wall sometimes, but so JKR!
- The image of Fred or George (which ever one it was) calmly shutting a first year girl in a compartment, and her screaming her head off...too funny.
- Your powers of description are astounding! I could see everything, hear it, feel it... WOW
- I really loved Hollis' family you created, from her parents to Gram to the cat that refused to be stuffed into a crate. :)

Once again, thanks so much for a wonderful chapter! Must sleep now, but as soon as I can, I'll be back to find out more about Hollis and Fred!

Oh, and I do believe that you deserve an Honorary Membership in my Include More Fred and George in Fanfic Support Group. Here, have a welcome cookie.

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Review #6, by 1917farmgirl February 1996

8th October 2013:
Okay, I've been trying to get started reading this great story for three days now and I am FINALLY getting done with the first chapter. No, that's not because it was hard to get into your writing or your story, but because people kept interrupting me! Silly people! Can't they tell I'm busy with important things?

So, I'm in love with this story already. Fred and George are by far my most favorite characters, but I don't read a lot of stories about them because usually they are out of character, or romances with cardboard-cutout girls. This is neither!

Fred is spot on so far, and if you've nailed him, I'm sure you'll nail George as well. I absolutely loved every line he spoke, action he did. I think I almost lost it when Fred called Madam Pince "Irma." That was classic. Please keep giving me more Fred like this!

And Hollis! What a great OC, and I've only just met her! I admire your guts to tell the story in first person. That can be really hard, and almost leave you feeling exposed. Of course, you are a brilliant author, one of the HPFF legends, so why wouldn't you be able to pull it off?

I'm not jealous of your talent, or your ability to write the twins, or believable, real OC's. No, not at all! Why would you think that? (Tries to cover up the green creeping up her soul, LOL>)

I can't wait to see how this goes! I'm especially intrigued by the fact that your chapters don't seem to be going in chronological order. Will have to see how this works!

Oh, and just so you know, I'm kind of a slow reader. If you don't see another review from me right away, it doesn't mean I'm not still reading. It just means those PEOPLE keep interrupting!

BRAVO! Thanks so much for sharing!

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Review #7, by lovemesomethinSirius May 1998

11th September 2013:
Oh my.. I sobbed the whole time I was reading this- I'm still crying. You've given Hollis such life and made her so believable and you made the relationship between her and Fred so beautiful and so real. Every single word hit hard. It amazes me how you can write absolutely anything- from the twins and Lee and their crazy hilarious antics, to creepy scary Florean in one of your previous stories, to this. I'm a little awestruck at the very real, very heartbroken response you were able to evoke in me with this chapter.

I also have to say that I'm insanely impressed with how you wrote Molly.. You stayed so true to her character and managed to perfectly convey a mothers pride and grief and in such a dignified way. I pray to any God who will listen with everything I have that I never have to bury my child- but, God forbid it ever happens, I would hope that I could do so with the grace and dignity that you gave Molly here. And, in a weird and somewhat morbid way, that's probably one of the best compliments I've ever given someone on their writing. I'm very impressed, well done.

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Review #8, by lovemesomethinSirius September 1995

10th September 2013:
"I would never drown, of course. My swagger alone would keep me afloat."

Best lines ever, I laughed so hard. I love that Fred just knows that she was daydreaming about him.. They have a very cute and interesting chemistry and their interactions are always amusing. Poor Fred, she would've made a great wife for him.

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Review #9, by BookLover94 April 1996

8th September 2013:
There are honestly no Fred/OC stories that can compare to this one! It is probably tied for first place as my favourite hp fanfiction of all time :) I absolutely adore their friendship and the way the story progressed. I thought the writing was stellar and the characters were believable which is hard to find in most fanfics, especially the canon characters which are usually horrible and feel like a completely different character just with the same name. It really felt like it was actually JK's Fred and this was his untold story. I knew it was going to end tragically but I didn't expect to cry so much! :'( I was absolutely heartbroken for Hollis and even though I wish they could've had a happy ending, it made the story all the more tragic and it felt like it was coming straight from JK Rowling herself, unlike so many other Fred stories where they simply pretend he doesn't die.

All in all it was an amazing story and you did a brilliant job. I hope that one day I'll find a Fred/OC fic that even comes close to measuring up to this one, because Fred was my favourite character and it's too hard to imagine that he never found love before he died..

10/10

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Review #10, by Alexandra Philippa Bester May 1998

30th May 2013:
X ... RIP Fred Weasley
amazing story ... x

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Review #11, by Rainpixie April 1996

21st April 2013:
I have read several of your stories and this one is, hands down, my favorite thus far. I liked it so much that i waited till the last chapter to review because honestly i just didn't want to wait to read. I read the whole story start to finish and I am still sobbing! How tragic! I knew going into it that it was a destined tragedy of sorts, but I still wasn't prepared for Molly's speech at Fred's funeral. You captured their romance so beautifully. Are you sure Hollis isn't a canon character?? She might as well be! I did almost expect her to make some crack about Lee being the "friend" that fancied her. I could almost imagine the mortified look on Fred's face when she (teasingly) thought it really was his friend! But that little day dream aside, allow me to praise the bits of your story that i really liked. I loved Delphine. She was very consistently and believably written character, and so delightfully annoying. I laughed at her boy craziness so many times! I liked how Hollis could always tell the twins apart (I might be showing my age here but have you ever seen Passport to Paris? I was totally reminded of the Olsen twins lol). I thought the out of order snapshot format was absolutely brilliant. And I really liked the day dreams. OK I'll stop gushing (until the next story I read, that is). In the mean time, happy writing!

Author's Response: Hi again! Oh my goodness, you have just been blowing through my stories like a tornado. I can barely keep up with you!

I'm so, so pleased to hear that this one is your favorite. "So, Listen..." is my personal favorite, too. It's not a long, action-y story, it's not an epic romance, it's just two teenagers who were sometimes friends and sometimes a little more than that, who didn't receive their happy ending. It was my goal to give Fred some semblance of romance before his death, because the idea of him dying without ever having truly been in love made me extremely sad. And at its heart, friendship is the most important aspect of the story. Hollis's friendship with Fred. Hollis's friendship with Delphine. Fred's friendship with George, which cannot be disregarded just because Hollis comes into the picture. George and Delphine's strange friendship. I'm so happy you loved Delphine, too, because it really is important for a story to be more than Person A and Person B falling in love and spending all of their time together. No matter how boy-crazy (or just crazy in general) Delphine was, she stuck to Hollis's side.

Passport to Paris, omg. I watched all of those movies! XD

Seriously, your reviews have been absolutely incredible. I feel so flattered that you've come back to read more and more of my stories. :) Thank you so much!

- Sarah


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Review #12, by A May 1998

5th April 2013:
I have never read a story about Fred weasley. I have never shed a tear while reading an imitation of j.k. Rowling's work. I have never felt like I was experiencing a continuation of her work, what she would truly be proud of, then I have reading this story. Molly's speech reduced me to the same emotions I experienced as I read about Sirius disappearing behind the veil, dumbledore falling from that balcony, or seeing George kneeling before his other half that eve at hogwarts. Truely a beautiful piece. How tragic it is that Molly will never know what feed had, and what he could of had. I wish you had let Hollis meet the family, but I understand why you refrained

Author's Response: Hello there, A. Thank you for your wonderful review! Hollis Wright has a special place in my heart, and for that reason I could never write another Fred/OC or Fred/another character. I wrote Fred again in my novel "Run", but couldn't bear to give him any kind of romance because, for me, I feel like he and Hollis belonged together. I'm so happy you liked them, and that this story pulled at your heart strings. I find that one of my main desires in fan fiction is to give love to those who didn't get a chance to experience it before their deaths. Fred's love was more friendship than romance, but it did the job.

Thank you so much. :)


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Review #13, by Terri April 1996

23rd February 2013:
This has been an incredible story - definitely one of my favourites I've ever come across. It made me smile, laugh, and even cry (embarrassingly so, especially from just reading.. sheesh I should get a life). Cannot stress how much I enjoyed it - I'll give Run a read and hopefully there's a mention of Hollis in there somewhere!

Author's Response: Thank you so much! Hearing that you laughed, smiled, and cried is so encouraging and so wonderful from an author's standpoint; I always hope to get that range of reaction.

Sadly, there is no Hollis in Run. :( It's more canon in that sense. But once you start reading, it's such a different world entirely that to insert her in there would probably feel bizarre. If you do read it, I hope you enjoy it!

Thank you so much for reading So, Listen...

:) Sarah


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Review #14, by AlmostInvisible  April 1996

19th January 2013:
Ohmigodness this is really quite amazing. Between this chapter and the previous chapter I just had tears rolling down my cheeks. Granted, that's not always saying a lot because it doesn't take much to make me cry, but it was very beautiful and touching and sad. I'm not really sure how you managed to make me feel so sad, but you did and it was pretty cool. Anyway, this is a very sweet story and you did a lovely job. :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much. :) It's the highest compliment on one's writing to hear that it produced this kind of effect in others. Strange as it is to say, nothing makes me happier than hearing that a sad chapter made a reader cry! Means I did something right. :) Thank you for reading and reviewing!

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Review #15, by Summer ^__^ May 1998

14th January 2013:
I literally cried through out this whole chapter. Before i got to here I looked up on HarryPotter Wiki and saw when Fred died. And when I saw the chapter name. I lost it. I read this, and it got me straight to the heart. Molly's speech was very great; J.K Rowling could have never made something like this. When I read this, I could barely see. I was weeping too much. And once I got down to George's part, I could just imagine the whole thing playing out in front of me. You are a really good writer. But even though Fred . (I cant say it :"[ ). It will always be Forge and Gred Weasley

Author's Response: *hugs* This was the most difficult chapter for me to write. I knew from the beginning that I was going to cover it, and when the time came it was just so much harder than I expected. But there was also a catharsis to it, and a sense of closure I never got after his death in DH. I'm so, so pleased you liked this well enough to get attached, and attached enough to cry. It makes me feel like I did something right. :)

Gred and Forge forever ♥


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Review #16, by MissMdsty April 1996

13th December 2012:
Wow! And I mean wow... This has left me speechless, it was just the kind of story I wanted to read. I love Fred and I'm pretty sure that given the choice, I would've traded his death for any other character's.

I am in awe of this, the romance and the drama. I'm a bad reader for not reviewing every chapter, but I just couldn't get away from the story for long enough to do so. You had me in tears by the second to last chapter.

The ending, it was just... perfect. You have a lovely mix of humor and drama and fluff an romance here and I feel so warm and fuzzy after reading this. Thank you for writting such a heart warming story!

Ral

Author's Response: Oh my goodness, thank you! You know, I think I would have done the same, trading his death for any other character's. His death hit me the hardest. But then again I hate that Teddy's orphaned and young Colin died, too. :(

I enjoyed writing this story so much. It started out as mostly fluff and then as the characters got older, darker themes began to intervene, and the end really is bittersweet. Sad because we know he's gone, but sweet because what they had was, to me, the best kind of magic. I'm so happy you liked it.

Thank you for reading and reviewing!


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Review #17, by MissMdsty February 1996

13th December 2012:
Hello there! I was searching for a story that would make me get lost in the fluff and romance of it all and Jess the Enthusiast recommended this to me on the forums.

What can I say? I already know you're an amazing writer, your grammar and spelling are flawless and your story flows perfectly.

This first chapter got me right into the mood of it all. The younger girl with a slight crush on Fred drew me in from the start and by the end of it, I couldn't wait for their next meeting.

I'm off to read more!

Ral

Author's Response: Jess the Enthusiast is the most enthusiastic reader - no pun intended. She's the reason why "So, Listen..." still gets readers trickling in, because she recommends it to people, and basically I owe her a ton.

I'm so happy you liked this! Hollis Wright and Fred Weasley will always have a place in my heart. I adored writing them.


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Review #18, by Serendipity1234 April 1996

29th October 2012:
Wow. This. Was. Amazing. It was so sweet ❤❤ I can't find words to express how much I absolutely adored every bit of it. You truly have a talent and I'm so glad this story was recommended to me!!
And for my first Fred/OC...wow. I don't know that anything can live up to this. It was PERFECTION ❤❤❤
The way you portrayed Fred was just so perfect, it's exactly how I would want him to be. How I think he should be based on the books. And I love what you did with their relationship. It wasn't all about the romance but about their friendship as well. The littlest things -sometimes mentioned almost flippantly, in one sentence- seemed like the most romantic or swoon-worthy gestures. I love that. And it truly seemed like they were in love. The little memories in the chapters are how I'd imagine someone who lost a loved one would remember them. Thank you, it really was a treat to read.
But I really really wish I knew what those papers said. I figure you must have a reason for not including that and I know there's meaning and importance to them (obviously) beyond that. But...I WANT TO KNOW. Gah.
I mean what would take 2 years?? Tell me?? If you were stuck between 2 ideas, never settled on an idea, whatever let me know? :) ❤

Author's Response: This was recommended to you? I'm very curious about who did that! Give them my thanks, will you? :)

Oooh, your first Fred/OC. That's exciting! I'm so glad this got to be your first Fred/OC. I started writing this story after scouring the archive for a Fred/OC to read, and was coming up disappointed. Either the Freds weren't canon or the OC's were too over the top, but I very soon decided that if I wanted to read a Fred/OC I knew I would like for certain, I would have to write it. I'm very happy I did - this story continues to be my favorite thing to go back and reread. :)

The friendship between Fred and Hollis was the dominating aspect, which I'm so glad you pointed out. It's more important than the romance, because it was longer lasting, a slow burn, and those memories will stay with Hollis forever. She doesn't have to reflect on him as just a boyfriend, but as someone who provided regular warm friendship. It will make for memories that are easier to bear recollecting. There's a lot more to romance than kissing, after all.

The paper! Well, if you insist. ;) I wanted to leave it up to your imagination, but it was Fred's note saying "I love you". He had been waiting for the perfect time to send it in life and never got the chance, so it happened after his death just because the charm broke.

Thank you for reading and reviewing!! ♥


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Review #19, by Love is a Mix Tape May 1998

9th October 2012:
So it's 3:30 in the morning and I am trying to muffle my sobbing so as not to wake anyone.

Muffle. My. Sobbing.

Not just tears. Sobbing. Agonized groans. Watery hiccups.

My fels.

Author's Response: :( -offers you box of tissues-

I'm sorry about your feels! (But secretly glad that you had them.) :3

Thank you for reading and reviewing!


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Review #20, by hbpfan April 1996

22nd August 2012:
Oh My Goodness! I can not believe how much I loved this story so much! Many stories do not make me cry but this one had me bawling! Oh it was so wonderful. I loved every minute of it , except for when Fred dies.
: ( This is the only bad thing about reading this about Fred in fanfiction. This was so amazing and has been put in my favorites. Thank you so much!!!

Author's Response: Eeep!! I must say that I'm pleased about this reaction! It means I did something right.

Fan fiction Fred is a hard thing to venture through. If it's an AU and he survives, that makes it less poignant because honestly, there would not be this many Fred-centric stories were it not for his death. And then in the stories where he dies, of course, there's this awful anguish and blergh. :(

Thank you so much for reading, reviewing, and favoriting! It means so much to me. :)


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Review #21, by TimeSeer April 1996

26th July 2012:
So I read this a while ago and I am just getting around to reviewing it.

This is such a great story. This story has made me laugh and cry. This is just an amazing story. I cannot ever express how great it is. It has left me speechless (in a good way) which is nearly impossible.

Please keep writing, you are an excellent writer. I think I will now go and read your other story.

Author's Response: Thank you so much. :) I'm so, so happy you liked it, and thank you for reading and leaving me this wonderful review. It really made my day.



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Review #22, by writeyourheartout April 1993

18th July 2012:
Hehehe Every time I read a new chapter of yours, I leave with a goofy grin on my face! :-p Why can't the twins be REAL?! -le sigh-

I don't know why, but Delphine's crush on Harry, like, super fascinates me, LOL. It cracks me up. Maybe just knowing Harry so well and how uninterested he was in girls other than two his entire life, it's just funny to see the fangirling from this POV! *chuckle*

The first half of this chapter was a little slow, but by the end of it, I was a very happy camper. Again I have to mention the chemistry between Hollis and Fred. While it wasn't as flirty or romantic in this chapter (which was actually a really cool thing to see since they've gone back in time and I assume we'll actually at some point be seeing the transition from acquaintances/friends into crushes), they still fit so well together with their interactions.

Gosh, you really do have such a great handle on Fred, it's kind of ridiculous. His sense of humor and wit is exactly how it's always been in the books and how I always hope to see it continued on in fanfiction. Drawing Dumbledore on Hollis' arm cracked me up, hahaha, and it wouldn't be a work of his if his name didn't show up somewhere, leaving no doubt as to who left the marks there! :-p

I feel like getting drawn on with a quill might be pointy and painful, but beauty is pain, amiright? ^.^

Oh Fred... you are indeed Lovely. Also... I MUST know what this wand event was! You're so great about setting up these mini-cliffhanger things because I know that story is going to pop up eventually and I really want to know now! *whines*

-sigh- I guess I shall just have to continue reading until all my curiosities are satisfied... Luckily for me, it will be a very painless journey through your once again marvelous writing skills. :-)

Oh, before I wrap this up, I wanted to say that I really love Hollis' family background! A whole line of Hufflepuffs! YES. And you've created that adversity towards the entire family who's magical lineage seems to be very unstable - skipping generations and such, all being sorted into the house that so many consider the 'left-overs' (*grumbles*). It's just a very cool concept and I wonder if you'll be playing around with those facts later on... Hmm...

You're too cool for school. Stop being so talented. Thanks.

Author's Response: Eee, thank you so much. I sound like such a broken record, but I'm so grateful for your feedback!

Delphine is all sorts of delusional. The girl's brain is filled with marbles or something, I don't know. She's sort of my guilty pleasure character because I could make her say the strangest things with no shame whatsoever. It was a lot of fun. XD

I apologize for the first half of this chapter being a tad slow. I confess that some of my desire for writing this story was, to add to what I said in my previous review response, the appeal of ordinary life at Hogwarts. Like, if I had the time to sit down and write about some ordinary kid through all seven years at Hogwarts, and detail nothing but classes and schoolwork, I would be on cloud 9. I'm really weird like that - my favorite parts of the books tended to be charms lessons and the like, because it really fascinated me. I loved learning about magic while Harry did - and here I am rambling again. :P

Yep, you will definitely see every transition in Hollis and Fred's relationship! All of the sticky awkwardness, the fluffiness, the nerves, etc. I'll warn you ahead of time that not every moment is loaded with suspense and romance, though.

Depending on how long you read this story (I forget how many reviews you'll be giving as prizes, so you might run out before this), you will definitely see the wand scene! There are lots of very small allusions to events that are easy to overlook, but that are expanded upon in later chapters.

You are awesome and tops and all the other good words. All of them. :) Thank you so much for reading.


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Review #23, by writeyourheartout October 1995

18th July 2012:
Another lovely chapter, Toujours! Not that this surprises me in the slightest. ^.^ Even though this is a slower paced story, it's still just so enjoyable to read and enjoy the small moments you give us. Like, if only Voldemort did where a top hat! Maybe a cane, too. And a tuxedo. A monocle, perhaps... Now that would be a classy villain. Although it might make him too reminiscent of the Penguin from Batman...

I love that Delphine has a crush on Harry! Of course pushing Hermione is certainly frowned upon, haha, but it's a really cute idea. Makes sense, of course, seeing as he is the famous Harry Potter and Delphine's personality seems to really fit into the category of girls who would crush on him almost strictly for that reason (since we learn later that they've never actually spoken). And it's nice to see that someone appreciates Harry's hair style... hehehe

OMG Are these two Hufflepuffs? That makes me excited. :-) I don't see too many Hufflepuff characters get the main OC role and it's even better to see one that will be paired with a Weasley twin! This story is right up my alley - so many of my favorite things happening here, haha I can't wait to learn more about Hollis, especially now knowing that she's a Puff.

I really love the way you describe Hollis and Fred's interactions. Their chemistry is so palpable to me as a reader, which I'm kind of surprised about because I don't feel like I know very much about Hollis yet, but I'm still rooting for her and for them! The way she can just feel that he's looking at her, that she's so aware of him - it's very real and makes me all excited to see them hopefully get together sometime!

"We soon made our way past the Hogsmeade Station, and chose also to bypass The Three Broomsticks in favor of shopping." This sentence is a little wonky around the 'chose able' bit.

Oh hey, there's Alice again! I thought she might come back in a similar fashion to this. I really appreciate how you set her up in the last chapter - it was almost like they were going to become friends at first, too, so it was fun to see how that changed into the relationship they have now. "Truthfully, we all enjoyed hating each other too much to give it up." - It's awful, but I've totally been there.

I really loved the Hogs Head bit! I've said it before, but it makes me smile every time I see little bits of canon brought into a fanfic.

Rock, parchment, sword - nice. I think Delphine's character really took shape in this chapter - I learned a lot about her. She's very human, which I love. There are no Mary-Sue's here, which is really nice. Delphine has some attitude and can be really funny and very open about her opinions and I think she and Hollis have a really believable friendship. All the little details about Delphine is what really sold her for me (her trunk full of pocket change, doing what she can to get free things from people, cheating her way into winning simple games), she almost reminds me a bit of Ron in certain ways. Maybe she and Harry would be good together. :-p

The ending was so cute! When the twins wondered how she could tell them apart, it was a really sweet moment - made me giggle for the two of them, hehehe. Honestly, the chemistry between Fred and Hollis is what's really keeping me into this story. You can't help but root for them and wonder why it takes them so long to figure it out! I mean, they clearly like each other, but we know that this is only 1995, and they still aren't together a year from now. But it's that anticipation that really stays with me and makes me all giggly about them, hehehe. I truly cannot wait to see how these two continue to develop as a couple! *squee*

Author's Response: Hello again, Tanya! You never cease to amaze me. You leave such consistently thorough reviews - I heard a few other Gryffindors talking about that earlier.

The pace of this story is a bit different from the sort of thing I usually write, because it's all out of order and I focus solely on small, quiet moments featuring Hollis and Fred together, or at the very least mentioning Fred. Just flashes of their relationship, like flipping through a scrapbook.

I loved writing a Harry fangirl. I think there are always those annoying girls who like a boy just for the sake of liking him, because he's famous or he has famous relatives or whatever, and Delphine has embraced this role with gusto. She's a silly character - almost always over-the-top, and I think that's what made her so much fun to write. I'm not sure if people like Delphine really exist, and if they do I'm sure I would hate them, but in the fan fic world it's fun to just be able to do whatever I want and make characters like that run rampant around Hogwarts. XD

Hufflepuffs! Yes! Hufflepuffs don't get nearly enough love on the archive. The other Houses get more attention, have more easily-defined reputations, and Hufflepuff gets lost in the shuffle. When I set out to write this story, my main thing wasn't even about the Fred/OC ship, but it was about showing the lives of two people who weren't important to the Harry Potter plot, who didn't join the DA or play Quidditch or were popular, brilliant, etc. I wanted to make OC's who /could/ have been in the background somewhere. The wallflowers, the rest of the population Harry didn't pay attention to. Hollis's life is by no means spectacular, and I think that's what appealed to me. There were so many people just like that in Hogwarts, going about their business as ordinary students, not having to face Voldemort every year, and I loved showing that.

Oh my goodness, it takes ages for Hollis and Fred to get it right. Even when they do know they like each other, life seems to throw a wrench in their party at inopportune moments. :/ What I've found I enjoy the most in a love story is not the happily ever after, but the slow momentum, the rises and lows they take to get there.

Thank you so much for your lovely reviews! They totally made my day. And thanks for listening to me ramble. I tend to write essays in responses. :)


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Review #24, by writeyourheartout September 1990

18th July 2012:
Remember that time I thought that the difference between 1996 and 1990 was only 2 years? I'm very intelligent.

Anyway, another great chapter of this story! I really love the way that the two were introduced! I was sort of expecting Fred to be Percy in this - the one who pulls her out of trouble, because in so many of these humor/romance stories on the archive, that's the formula I see. I have to start reminding myself that when I'm reading your stories, I need to expect the unexpected, because you never do the expected, and that's what makes you such a great and original writer.

Fred, once again, was absolutely brilliant! So spot on. I can be really picky with the twins, but I swear it's like you invented the two yourself. He's so in character! His dialogue is so brilliant and the way you describe his actions and expressions reminds me so much of JK Rowling and how she would have described them, too.

I'm not sure what to think of Hollis in this chapter! I mean, she's a great character - don't get me wrong, you've written her brilliantly - but sort of jumped to conclusions pretty quick there with Alice. hehe Not that people don't do that in real life, of course! :-p I think you've probably just set us up for some really great future chapters. I expect we'll be seeing more of Alice, maybe as a common enemy for Hollis and Delphine (hilarious entry for her character, by the way! Love that the two are introduced in a way that involves Fred, knowing that they stay friends later in life).

I thought maybe there was one-too-many Cecil references that it sort of lost its humor and impact as the story continued, but it's a tiny detail - certainly nothing to worry about, just maybe a little over-played.

I thought Percy was really great, although part of me feels that with his pompous way about him, someone saying thank you to him wouldn't cause him to pause and question whether or not he should actually accept it and say you're welcome - I'm under the impression that it's more likely that he would take any praise he could get, but that's another tiny detail that is strictly a matter of opinion!

Overall, it was a great second chapter. :-)
Tanya

Author's Response: Hi, Tanya!

I like to imagine Percy fancying himself Master of the Train and bossing everyone into their seats. He really does mean well, though, and is always keen to help anyone he can. I really do love Percy. :)

I'm glad you liked Fred! He's a lot different here in his younger days - a lot more boyish, much less mature. Haha, Hollis was very quick to dislike Alice, I think, because she was embarrassed and feeling slighted. It's a bit of silly backstory to explain a bit of why they're such mortal enemies later on.

Thank you for all the feedback! I'm very appreciative of it, and I'm definitely going to go back over and look to see if Cecil pops up too much. ^ ^

Oooh, for that last part about Percy saying "you're welcome", are you referring to the very end of the chapter? Because that was George. :P At this point, Hollis doesn't realize that Fred and George are two different people. She has that scene with Fred, until he lets her into the compartment with Delphine, and afterwards Hollis sees him and thanks him for sort of helping. But she doesn't know that she's actually thanking George (this is revealed later, I think), so George, at this point, is being thanked by a stranger and has no idea what she's talking about. Percy had /just/ left the scene before that:

The boy who had locked Delphine in our compartment waltzed into the narrow corridor, smiling hugely. Before my nerves could smother the opportunity, I greeted him.

"Thank you, by the way."

I hope that cleared a bit up! Thank you so much for the detailed review! :)


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Review #25, by lanniejo April 1993

12th July 2012:
Okay, im not easily persuaded to leave reviews but i thought you should know that i adore your writing, its brilliant, also ignore the hideous misuse of grammar. :D

Author's Response: Thank you!! Your grammar looks just fine to me. ^ ^ Thank you so much for reading. I hope you continue to enjoy. :)

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