Awww. Poor fred. NOOO!Author's Response: Oh, I know. I'm a horrible person :P Report Review
YES! a thousand squees for you! HahahahAuthor's Response: Thank you! Report Review
I love ravenclaw house's approach to cheering for quidditch teams, hahaha.
Luna is, of course, always good for a laugh.
I have to stop reviewing now so that i can get to the next chapter! Eek! Hahaha.Author's Response: I'm glad you like it! That's just my take on how they would do things, but I think it makes sense. Luna's fantastic, though I worry about getting her right sometimes :P Report Review
NICE! i honestly haven't read about many hot lists in fanfiction.Author's Response: Nor have I :P It's just one of those fun little things I made up. I like doing that :P Report Review
GAH! i HATE umbridge. Sure, it's an undisputed hate, but her vileness never ceases to reach new levels of depravity! URGH. >=ZAuthor's Response: Oh I know! She's such a horrible character, it was actually a challenge to write her, but I'm glad she's just as horrible and vile and depraved as she is in the books, that's a good sign :P Report Review
It's always fun to read a story about the actual goings on within one of jkr's books according to an oc.Author's Response: It's fun to write about too :P I just enjoy writing a new perspective on things. Report Review
(Another First review) HOT LIST, it's good to see that the routine running of the school has not been interrupted by Umbridge and the threat of Voldemort. I had to laugh. Another 10/10.Author's Response: Oh yes, that was a great bit of fun! I love writing the little school routine things, I'm a bit odd like that :P Glad you enjoyed it! Report Review
Nice one. Another great chapter, brought back the memories of reading the book. Your story at this point is unfolding nicely. I like the idea of Harry and Athena working together. So another 10/10 and on to the next chapter.Author's Response: Thanks! Dumbledore's Army was always a concept I absolutely loved, and I'm glad I brought back some memories for you :P Report Review
Eeek! This chapter has left me grinning, despite it beginning with that dention and horrendous quill.Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it! It's always great to hear that :P Report Review
ROFL. I am an incredibly sarcastic person by nature, so athena is like a dream character!Author's Response: You and me both :P Report Review
Hahaha, athena sounds like a riot!Author's Response: I'm so glad you like her! I love her, myself. She's my favourite :P Report Review
LOL, your formatting is sort of funky, but this chapter was still very interesting. i like the feeling of being plopped down into the middle of the story. i'm excited to see where this goes!Author's Response: Oh, I know, the formatting is shocking! In my defence, this is the first chapter I ever submitted to the archive; I keep meaning to fix it, but never get around to it :P Thanks for the review! Report Review
What a great chapter, I was on tenderhooks all the time. From what I can gather from this chapter, you appear to have Athena and Harry going to teach everyone in the DA on how to defend themselves. Is this true? If so what an interesting twist in the tale. Since you have already completed this story, I should find the answer to my question somewhere in the chapters to come. Another 10/10 for this chapter. (I cannot believe that you never got a review for this chapter)Author's Response: Thanks! It is true indeed, and it is a bit of a twist, but I think one that makes sense, given Athena's character (if she wasn't a leader, she would have found a way to become one) Report Review
Those Weasley twins have an answer for everything (kind of reminds me of a good friend of mine). I loved the non stop humour in this chapter. Another 10/10.Author's Response: Ah yes, I love the Weasley twins. It's always a challenge writing them and trying to do their sense of humour justice, so I'm glad I've pulled it off :) Report Review
HEEHEEHE loved this chapter. It was funny seeing Athena and the Weasley twins having a battle of words over detentions etc, etc (though where detentions are concerned, I think the twins still hold the Hogwarts record). Another good chapter and another 10/10. Now for the next chapter.Author's Response: Thank you! I do like how they interact, it was always great fun writing it :P Report Review
Just Quiddich say's Hermione, she has just committed the ultimate sin where Quiddich is concerned, anyway Ron (as we all know) proves himself to be a very capable flier later on. I take it this story is set during the time of THE ORDER OF THE PHEONIX. A great chapter and another good start, cannot wait to see to read the next chapter. So I give you 10/10 and now I go onto the next chapter.Author's Response: It is indeed! Thank you so much for the reviews, I'm honestly at a loss for what to say. It means so much to me that you would go through all my stories and read and review them :) Report Review
Hi! I enjoyed reading the story, however, I believe it ended rather abruptly. I mean, not to be rude or anything, I loved everything about the story, but, maybe you could have stretched out the story a little farther than where it left off... maybe into Athena and Fred's future! I don't know, just ideas. However, altogether, great job on the entire story! I love how there is sespence, romance, heartbreak, ect... brilliant job!Author's Response: I know it ended abruptly, but I admit, that's because I was already several chapters into writing the sequel (which is set two years later) and I was struggling to return to the timeframe of that one. I'm glad you enjoyed the story though, and keep an eye out for Blurring the Lines! Report Review
Bronze eagle-shaped knocker- "How can one travel through time without use of a Time Turner?"
Me-...through memories?...do i get in?!Author's Response: You fully would, that's what I would say myself :P Good thinking! Report Review
AH EPIC ENDING, EPIC ENDING EPIC ENDING!
"so be it!!" XD
I loved it, it really is absolutely epic and I can't wait for more in the future!!Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it and I'll get the sequel (of sorts) posted as soon as possible :) Report Review
It was good, but it doesn't much feel like the end of the story, but I liked it!
NatalieAuthor's Response: Thank you :) I know I'm not particularly good at endings, and the story sort of follows on to the next one I'm writing, but I'm glad you enjoyed it :) Report Review
No there isn't another chapter yet I didn't realize I'd gotten this far in reading the story! D: I love Fred of course and your mention of Doctor Who had me geeking out. Your main character amuses me the most out of everyone I think can't wait to read more :]Author's Response: No, there isn't another chapter; this is the end, I'm afraid. I'm glad you enjoyed the mention of Doctor Who, I've been hoping people notice it :P I'm glad you like Athena, there's plenty more of her in my next story mentioned in the A/N, so keep an eye out for it :) Report Review
I really like this story and that Dr. Who reference just made my day. YAY. :)Author's Response: Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed the reference, I had great fun slipping it in there :) Thanks for the review! Report Review
I hope you don't mind some critique :) You've got a good grasp of grammar and spelling, I've noticed, but it might be easier to read if you formatted spaces between the different dialogues. I haven't got much of an idea of the story yet in this first chapter, I prefer to know more about the characters this fic is mostly about -- no need to throw everyone in there at once. It makes it seem a little directionless. Make your dialogue count. Make it funnier or more purposeful. Idle chatter drags things on.
I like that this is rooted in canon, many people don't try that. And I always love Ravenclaws ;D. I laughed at insane!Wood and her Beater bat comment.
*goes back to frolic in the snow*Author's Response: Critique is fine! I'm aware this chapter really isn't the greatest; the spacing issues are caused by me being brand-new to the site when I posted the first chapter (hence, I wasn't sure how to use the editors) and I know I need to introduce the characters better. It's definitely high on the list to fix up and edit once the queue reopens again. Once again, thanks for the advice, it'll come in handy when I edit this :) Report Review
Hey Lisa! Here from the snowball thread 8D
Wow, you brave girl! I wouldn't dare write such a huge story set during canon, no less, in fear of messing up what JKR wrote originally. .___. Good job on that!!
The first sentence of dialogue cracked me up, and set Athena's character wonderfully well as a Ravenclaw and someone with a quick wit. YEA RAVENCLAW! *clears throat* Umm..
Anyways, one thing that stuck out to me was that you might want to vary your dialogue a bit more. It seemed a bit repetitive after a while. The format quickly turned into something like "quote," said adverb. Try putting mixing it up a bit more, like putting said & adverb before the quote. I think a bit more description could spice it up a bit more as well :)
The concept you've got for the story is good, and I love how Athena's a beater! I don't think I'd ever be brave enough to be a beater. No, scratch that - I'd be one of those girls quivering at the sight of a broom. :P
~foundriapenguinAuthor's Response: Thanks for the review! It never struck me as brave to write during canon, though you do have a point. I had HP Wiki open almost the entire time I was writing this :P
I know this first chapter isn't the greatest, and it's first on my list to go back and edit once I've got the final chapter up.
To be honest, I wouldn't be brave enough to be a beater either :P Report Review
good chapter, I really enjoyed reading it!!Author's Response: Thank you! :D Report Review
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