Alright so this was an interesting chapter. I liked the insight that we got into Katherine's character. We learned a bit more about her personality here as you really showed her aptitude for books, and of course there was that sneak peak into her past.
I think your characterization was spot on. Fred and George both seemed like the fun loving pranksters that they are in the books. I like how you incorperated some lines from the books into this i.e. "Ask no questions and I'll tell you no lies".
The Slytherins seem a bit extreme in this chapter, but I suppose that its accurate for how they would actually act in the actual books. I felt so bad for Katherine when the snow globe was smashed. Selwyn is a git.
I did see a few things in here that you could improve on. For one the flash back seemed a bit abrupt. I would add some kind of transition in there. Also the formating was a bit distracting, so I would go back and fix that.
Other than those two things you're golden :)
Hope this helped.
-BoOkWoRm24Author's Response: Hello sorry for the late response!
I'm happy you think the characterization was spot on, it's one of the things that worry me the most! Lol that's one of my favorites line in the book, when I was a kid I thought it was absolutely brilliant.
Thank you for mentioning the formatting I know that tends to get on people's nerves (plus it is distracting.) And of course I'll smooth the transition to the flashback.
Thank you for the review. Report Review
Everything is working as well as it was in my review of the prologue. I like these two chapters, they have a spark to them that keeps the reader interested. Everybody is IC to me at least.Author's Response: Thank you for the review :) I'm happy to see you think I kept everyone in character Report Review
Back for the next chapter as requested. I think you are doing a good job of forwarding the plot of this story and I think you have a pretty good grasp of your characters -- their behavior seems consistent and mostly age apropriate. Though, I do have to say that I'm not the best judge of 12 year olds... that was a very long time ago.
I think my favorite part of this chapter was the Hogwarts-y feel it had. All the interhouse rivalry and bickering between characters, the talk of quidditch, the normal progression of lessons. It was refreshing since a lot of FF forgets that hogwarts is the center of what we know and love about HP.
My biggest critique for you (since I promised I'd give some) is the rapid manner in which George fell for Katherine... I do like that he doesn't want people to think he fancies her, but all the talk about his heart beating and such seems a little feminine for a 12/13 year old boy. It's a minor point, but something to consider.
Keep up the good work!Author's Response: Sorry for the late response but school is killing me XD
First off thank you for the review, It was difficult writing from the pov of a 12 year old (it was so long ago XD makes ya feel old don't it?)
Thank you! I love the Hogwarts-y vibe which is why I make an effort to have the school shine through the fic.
NO it's not supposed to look like he fancies her so thank you so much for pointing that out! (to me it's a major point since they're just starting out to be friends. plus he's supposed to be a boy XD)
Thank you :) Report Review
I'm always a sucker for a good twin story and when I saw this George/OC fic I had to click it. I'm currently writing a georgelina and think it's neat to compare. I think that one of the best things about fanfiction is that two stories about the same character can be so vastly different.
I love you beginning bit before we skip ahead to 1989. It set a very realistic tone to the story and framed it nicely. I think you did a phenomenal job with the twins and am interested to read more about them. Your OC is intriguing as well. I adored the sorting (always a sucker for a good sorting ceremony). All in all, this is a good first chapter and I hope to return to read more some time soon.
MelissaAuthor's Response: Can I have a fangirl moment please! XD I love With all Things, right now it's one of my favorite fics, so this review means a lot. I mean it really is fun to compare :) I've done it myself before.
I hope you do return to read more of this story :) Report Review
Hi! DistantGalaxy from the forum "review tag" :D
I'm happy I actually chose to review this story! I love reading about Fred and George. This first chapter is off to an awesome start, I'm pretty intrigued to find out more about Katherine and what happened at the beginning of the story. That part was really well written and exciting to read.
So off to the next chapter I go! I'll make sure to keep reviewing. Good job :)
ps. whats the main ship in this story? is it George/oc, Fred/Angelina, neither?? Just wondering.Author's Response: Hullo distant!
Thank you for your review and compliments, I hope you enjoy the next chapter as much as this one :)
The main ship is George/oc Report Review
Alright so this chapter seemed to be split off into two parts-the part with Elizabeth and Fred and George's train ride/sorting, thus this is how I'm going to review this.
The first part was amazing. Other than the fact that I saw a few minor grammar errors (ie a comma out of place here and there) there is literally nothing I could possibly critisize about it. I think my favorite part of it was how you made a point to say that the Death Eater and Katherine both had blue eyes. Then you have Elizibeth say his name. You don't come out and say it(which made me love this part even more) , but I'm pretty sure that the Death Eater is her father. You wrote it to the perfect extent and left me guessing. All good beggings leave you with unanswered questions, and thats exactly what you did here.
Onto the second part.
This bit wasn't as good as the first part. It wasn't that you wrote it badly, or that there was many errors with flow or pacing or anything really, becuase as far as writing goes it was done quite well. I think what bugged me was that it wasn't as interesting as the first part. We already knew that Fred and George were going to be Gryffindors so there really wasn't anything to build suspense here, your reader knew what was going to happen already. In fact the only bit of new information that I pulled out of it was that Katherine's last name was Rowle and that she was a Gryffindor. This could be supressed into a single sentence. Again it wasn't that there was anything wrong with your writing here. I suppose it just felt out of place after reading such a suspenseful first half (that also had nothing to do with Fred and George).
Anyway overall it was a good start. Feel free to rerequest for later chapters :)
-BoOkWoRm24Author's Response: Hello! :)
I'm glad you liked the first part, I had such a hard time with it, ahh you are the first to notice that detail :) *gives cookie* here's a gift detective!
Thank you for your review and I'm sorry you didn't enjoy the second part as much though later in the story there is alot of suspense :) Report Review
Hi, again! Couldn't resist another chapter.
I remember the Quidditch match you're describing here so clearly from both the book and the movie. Again, I think you've done a terrific job of borrowing from canon and creating your own scene within a bigger picture that everyone will recognize.
I like the way that you're slowly pulling George and Katherine towards one another, initially accomplishing it by pushing their existing love interests away. The way that George is falling out of love (lust?) with Heather reminds me a lot of the way that Ron lost interest in Lavender in HBP. The way that Heather is so silly and trampy (OK, that part is less like Lavender, but still), and the way that helps George to realize that he needs more from a relationship and that there's somebody already close to him who can offer that. All very reminiscent.
The butterflies and anxiety leading up to the Hufflepuff match was also well done. I admire you for really pacing the introduction of the canon characters and especially the trio. It would be easy to fluff out your chapters by just dumping them liberally in, but instead you're pacing yourself, adding in a little Harry here and a little Hermione there.
I see you have an ongoing thing with Katherine and the dementors. They seem to be drawn to her after some fashion, just as they are to Harry. Perhaps it's the phenomenon of having seen death? I do have to nit-pick you just a bit on having Katherine try to cast a Patronus. That seemed like a bit of an overstep. It's a very advanced spell, certainly not one that the students would have learned from Quirrell or Lockhart, and Lupin was only teaching it to Harry so that he could fight his fear of the dementors. I can see that she might have known about it, but to try to do that while flying through a rainstorm... it just seemed like a bit too much.
Fred, George and Lee having their confrontations with Michael and the Slytherins worked just fine for me. Typical teenage hormone-induced squabbling, perfectly in character.
I'm unsure at this point what to make of Katherine's father showing up at the Hospital Wing. Clearly Madam Pomfrey was concerned enough to want to summon Professor McGonagall and possibly Dumbledore. That part makes me wonder whether the Hogwarts staff might know something about Katherine's past that she does not. Since Gideon and Fabian were both members of the first Order, others might know something about their relationship to Elizabeth. Don't you love it when I speculate out loud about where your story is going? ;)
I am really starting to enjoy your story. As your writing seems to get better and better, I find myself more and more drawn in to each chapter. You're telling a really terrific story.Author's Response: Hello sorry for taking so long to respond, it's just this a long review. First off thank you for such a detailed review :)
I want Katherine and George to come together when the time is right. Yeah I based Heather a bit off Lavender just a bit more mature :P
While I love the trio the story isn't really about them that's why they'll be a little bit of Hermione here some Harry there and Ron will turn up soon.
I brought in the dementors because they were in the match and Katherine fears them but they aren't her greatest fear, I get with her attempting a patronus charm while on a broom, as I edit I try and cut that scene especially since looking form it the outside it does seem far-fetched :P (Thank you for mentioning it.)
Teenage squabble ahhh it reminds me when I was a teen :P
I love when you speculate :P It makes me smile because you're either right or your just giving me ideas.
Thank you! :) I loved this story and hopefully by the end of the year I'll have it finished. Report Review
Hi! I'm here with your review! I'm sorry it's taken me so long :P
I can't really say much about plot since this is only the first chapter, but I like where you're going with this. I LOVE Fred and George, and I want to read more about Hogwarts from their perspective, especially with this Katherine! Wait...isn't she their cousin? Because if that's Fabian's daughter...? Or perhaps he isn't...? I don't know, haha, but I want to read more!
There was one part where I was confused. It was during the Sorting and George says he owes Katherine one and what words did she say that "would stick with him forever"? Also, what was she so sure about? (after she got Sorted) Did I miss something? :P
You were good with flow for the most part. My only concern is the beginning scene. It seems a little rushed (which is passable because she's kind of being pursued by a Death Eater), and the transition from peaceful to frantic could've been smoother. Elizabeth is putting her daughter to bed, worrying about Fabian, and then BOOM - Death Eater. Perhaps more internal dialogue from Elizabeth would help? Also, the exchange between Elizabeth and Thorfinn was a little confusing; Katherine staring up at him was odd... Or was it meant to be odd? Hm... This brings me back to the question of who her father is. GAH, just ignore my inner babblings.
There are lots of missing commas in your dialogue! :P Gah... I also noticed a couple run-on sentences. Since you're editing, you might want to fix those because they kind of distract the reader. (Or maybe it's just me because I'm a grammar Nazi. :P)
A very high point of your story. I thought your characterizations were brilliant, especially Gred and Forge - er, Fred and George. They were hilarious, and you got them very close to canon, which is awesome! I laughed right into their first few lines without even knowing what was going on; it was classic Fred and George. My favorite line has to be this one:
He knew Fred and George may be ready for Hogwarts, but he wasn't so sure that Hogwarts was ready for Fred and George, not just yet.
I laughed so hard because it's totally true! Oh, and I like Katherine so far. I felt terrible when she was by herself, though. :( I can't wait to see how you'll develop her character!
Again, I'm so sorry for taking a long time! :P I hope I wasn't too harsh! Good luck writing! I'd love to review for you again; this seems like the start of a great fic! :DAuthor's Response: Sorry for taking so long to respond XD My internet's been wonky XD
Now let me begin my response
Sorry about the confusion I don't think you missed much though, I mean as it's the first chapter I know you can't say much about plot but I appreciate the comments :)
As for Flow (that ryhmes XD) The beginning still needs some revision especially since back then I didn't know much about what I was going to do with Elizabeth. You'll now who her father is soon enough!
Lol I stink at grammar so I apreciate you pointing out my mistakes so I can fix them over the course of this summer.
Thank you, I love Fred and George :) So I'm happy I got the in character. You'll love Katherine later on :) No you werent harsh you were honest which I love :)
Once again, terrific! I really like how you plucked a well-known event from the books and retold it from the point of view of your own story.
I sense Katherine dumping Michael in the not-too-distant future. I might be wrong. Perhaps she'll hold on for a while just for the sake of appearances, but it has to be coming. She and George are growing so close. I love it!
The moment that she and George share at the end of the chapter was really nicely done. The tension and desire were palpable. I love how you took them so close, then blew up the whole thing. You magnificent tease!
That's all the time I have for this morning, but I will be back!Author's Response: Hello again :) Thank you again for the review :)
Katherine and Michael still have things to go through so I wouldn't count him out just yet (plus I sort of feel bad for the lad.) I love her relationship with George and that's why I try to show their friendship rather their new found love, I mean with this story I really want to transmit what the power of friendship is.
That last moment between them came out so naturally as do all their scenes, thank you for your reviews :)
Hope to see ya soon :) Report Review
So I read the first part of your story quite a while ago, and I was looking through some of my old reviews and realized that I hadn't checked in on it in ages. I have to say, you've made some pretty huge improvements to your writing! Bravo!
It was terrific to see Katherine finally begin to find some of the missing pieces to fill in her picture of her mother. But first, I wanted to compliment you on the way you handled the entire awkward Hogsmeade trip with Michael. I do think I would have liked it if you had slowed down the narrative just a bit and explored more of Katherine's thoughts and feelings, but I say that to pretty much everyone. The story, itself, was very well delivered. Michael comes off as this very nice, very thoughtful and very eager young man who's probably just a little too vanilla to hold Katherine's interest. Nevertheless, she seems to get a charge out of her first near-snogging experience.
Pierre was fascinating. He obviously knows a great deal about Katherine's past, but he's not going to spill that information just yet. You seem to be hinting very strongly that Katherine's mother was more than just friends with Gideon and Fabian. I have to imagine that Katherine has an encounter with Molly somewhere in her future, and I can't wait to see how that plays out. I get a strange sense that Molly is going to "recognize" her.
And finally you bring the story back around to the Halloween feast. George simply isn't going to give her a free pass on pretending that everything is rosy and fine with Michael. He seems to know her too well. But he does step in and save her from being grilled by Alica and Angelina, which was sweet of him.
I just can't say enough about how much your writing has improved since the last time I read this story. This chapter was free of spelling mistakes and typos and your grammar was really good. Everything flowed nicely, and I just breezed right through it. In fact, I think I'll read another!Author's Response: Hey so I was just about to respond to reviews when I saw you were back! Hey (I haven't gotten to reading your fic but expect a review soon for I am almost school free!)
Before anything else, thank you, this was a really meaningful review especially since I am terrified of grammar!
I want her to meet Molly but first she'll have to figure out her relation to Fabian and Gideon, because like you saw Pierre isn't spilling anything and I doubt her father or Selina would speak about it.
Thank you for your review CambAngst, I'm glad I've improved since the last time you were around :) (It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy!) Report Review
It's Rosie with your requested review! :)
Oh my gosh, the first part of the story was so suspenseful! You did a wonderful job luring readers into the story with this first chapter. I love your transition for the first part of the chapter. It starts off calm and peaceful and then all of a sudden a Death Eater comes into their house. I was staring at the computer screen in shock, not kidding! Surprising a reader is somehing that adds way more excitement to the story, and I loved it.
Fred and George's characterization was perfect. Their jokes and their actions were pretty much the same as from the books!
The transition from that scene to the scene with the Weasleys was a bit sudden. Maybe you could have done something like: "__ years later, the Weasleys..." It's just a suggestion, and the transition isn't really a big deal.
I also noticed that some dialogue was incomplete. Like this: "Now dear it's time for bed" but there should be a period or a comma at the end. This was actually pretty frequent throughout the story.
Anyway, I've been seeing this story on the archives for quite a while, but I haven't actually read it until now! Bad me. :( Wonderful first chapter, you've got good talent when it comes to writing! :)
~RosieAuthor's Response: Thank you for giving this story a chance :)
The first part was always hard to write and it becomes hard to edit it was meant to be suspenseful so I'm happy I got that down :) (Glad I surprised you!)
I love Fred and George and I'm happy I didn't butcher their characters :)
Thank you for letting me notice the dialogue problem which shall be fixed! (ASAP)
Thanks for being so helpful and I hope you liked this enough to read on :) Report Review
:( this is a sad story. what's going to happen to George and Katherine? what other secrets will Katherine find from reading her mothers diary and looking through the memories?
I can't wait to find out!
Update soon please!!!Author's Response: It is sad for now don't worry there are brighter times. You'll see soon what will happen to Katherine and George, as for the other secrets she'll find out, we'll have to wait and see.
The next chapter is already in process of editing :) Thank you for reading and reviewing. Report Review
I love how you picured Lee in this chapter! His comments at the game are spot on! :-)
The pace in this chapter is somewhat uneven. The Quidditch game is detailed and interesting, but then you skip too quickly to Christmas (What happened with that implied cheating, for example?). The Christmas part is also detailed and interesting, but after that you make another leap until Summer.
I appreciate the flashback when Katherine is thinking about Egil, as well as the letter from him. Both of them makes him "living" and real to me.
I noticed two small typos too: In the paragraph starting with "Angelina laughed": give should be given (?) and in the paragraph starting with "Father's never been" the comma in Katherin,e is misplaced. ;-)
She hasn't an easy live, your Katherine. I hope things will work out for her!Author's Response: Hullo Molly!
I love Lee so I'm glad you like him :) Hmm I never looked over this chapter and your comment about the pacing worries me. I thought of spiltting the chapter but then for that I think its a bit late.
Thank you for pointing out my errors :) (and for taking the time to point them out :) )
Katherine's life bites but you know what they say there's always light at the end of the tunnel. Report Review
I like how this story is progressing. I'm finding myself more and more captured by your story.
George is awesome! :-) He is so sweet and thoughtful, and I like that he isn't telling Fred everything. Another thing that I like is that he isn't telling Katherine if he is George or Fred. I wonder when she will find out?
I was a bit confused, though, and had to read twice to get it right, when you move from the paragraph starting with "George shook his head" and to the one starting with "Just tell me" and the following paragraphs and then back to "Fred bliked a couple of times". I can see that it is a kind of a flashback, but it was confusing at first.Author's Response: Thank you :)
I know isn't cute :P Oh she finds out soon enough :)
Sorry I meant to put flashbacks in italics so I'll at the as soon as I can :) Thank you for the heads up Molly :)
Again thank you for your review it was helpful and thank you pointing out that confusing flashback. Report Review
wow! i can't wait to keep reading this, it has such an intricate plot :P i really want to know what happens between Fabian and Elizabeth, and between George and Katherine.Author's Response: Hello! Thank you for reading and reviewing, the plot will start to unravel soon :) If you have any specfic questions you can see my MTA page :) Thanks again for the review. Report Review
This was a really fun and upbeat chapter.
I really love the way that you characterize the twins. They always make me smile when I read this. I also really liked Katherine in this chapter. She is all nervous over a boy and it is really relatable. Even Oliver Wood is characterized well with his obsession with Quidditch.
This chapter flowed smoothly and the pace was quite nice. They did a great job balancing one another out to make the overall effect simply wonderful.
The plot is clearly coming into play more and more as the chapters progress. I am curious to find out more about Katherine and her Mothers diary and more abut her mom in general. If I remember correctly wasn't a Prewitt involved in the begining and if so will we learn more about why?
Overall, I thought you did a great job with this chapter and I really love your charcterization, flow, pace, and the overall feel of the chapter itself. I liked seeing Katherine happy and nervous, the twins annoying Professor Snape, and Oliver being sentimental over Quidditch.
Keep up the great work! =)
Recenseo 2012Author's Response: Hey SR!
Thank you :)
I always worry about Ollie's character I love him about as much as I love the twins :)
Yes we will learn more about Fabian and Elizabeth later on. We learn about her mom through out the story, thanks I'm happy to know that you love the characterization. Thank you for you review :) Report Review
I loved this chapter!
I was so terrified for Katherine when the Dementor came on board the train. I also thought it was funny that they heard Draco's scream. The twins were perfectly portrayed. As usual the twins wreak havoc in the defense of their friends.
I thought that they flow of the chapter was smooth and well balanced with the pace of the chapter. The plot is coming out more in this chapter and I find it highly intriguing and exciting at the same time.
I loved the description and the small snippets of details that we get. It helped paint a great picture in my head as I read through the chapter.
Keep up the great work! =)
-SR17Author's Response: Hey SR! Sorry for the late response, it's the homework XD
I wish I played up more on Draco's screaming (maybe after I edit I will :P ) Thank you I'm happy to see that the plot doesn't seem messy or anything of the sort, I will keep up my work :)
Thank you again for the review. Report Review
I think that the story flows so far. You have good description and good characterization. good work.Author's Response: Thank you! :) I was worried about the description so I'm glad you liked it. Report Review
I notice that you don't use punctuation in dialogue...I'm not sure if you meant to do that or not? That's really all the grammatical error I see. I really like the whole characterization and how you tied the two stories together, but wouldn't Katherine be a bit older? I'm not sure, but good job so far.Author's Response: Thank you for your review! As you can see the story is in edits and I request reviews to see whether I've made the right edits or not. Here I didn't notice I wasn't using punctuation in dialogue.
I'm glad you like the characterization I think Ãt's my strong point :P But where do you mean Katherine would be older. In the first part she two maybe three and in the second part she's eleven. Report Review
Here again with a review!
I really liked all of the elements that you included in this chapter. I thought that it was very interesting and gave an indepth perspective of Katherine and your other host of characters.
I loved that she played Quidditch and they won. That she found out what Weasley twin is her best friend. To be able to see what her home life is like and all the mystery that surrounds her uncles death.
I thought that you did an amazing job bringing the plot out even more in this chapter. I thought if flowed smoother than the last chapter and I didn't find myself confused by messy transitions. I did see some minor typos that can easily be fixed up.
I loved how you kept the Twins' humor in this especially with Ron as the victim. I can't wait to see what happens next!!
Keep up the great work! =)
-SR17Author's Response: Thank you, I'm glad that Katherine manages to keep some interest and that the plot was brought out in this chapter. YAY! My transitions were smoother! :P Thanks I will fix the typos a.s.a.p
Humor is hard for me so I'm glad you think I was able to bring in some.
Thank you for your helpful reviews Report Review
This was a great chapter!
I loved that Katherine is going to play Quidditch. Although, I am worried because of the Slytherins. They just can't get enough of taunting her. I am also really glad to see the characters develope their personalities more. I loved how you included at the Quidditch practice Oliver being so serious, Quincy and Wesley getting into a fight, the girls just standing there watching like it was a circus madhouse and Fred & George helping Oliver pull the other two boys apart. I could see it all happen so vividly.
I thought the plot took on another level in this chapter. It really showed up well and I loved it. The flow was a little messy towards the end and I was a little confused because Fred was trying to figure out what George was telling him then it cuts into what I am not sure if it is suppose to be a memory of Katherine and George meeting? Then skips back to Fred laughing at George about having a tutor? He also asks if he fancies her. There was the word you missing from the sentence there.
Overall, I am curious to learn more about Katherine. She is an interesting character and I cannot wait to see what happens to her during the first Quidditch match. I love Fred & George. There humor is something that you do well in this story and I love it because it makes the darker times that much brighter. I did see a messy transition at the end which I have explained above, but it is something that you could easily fix and shouldn't be discouraged by.
Keep up the good work! =)
-SR17Author's Response: Hullo! *waves*
Yeah to Slytherins right now she's sort of what Neville was to Draco. The Quidditch practice I had to fix it a couple of times because it got confusing. That messy transition will meet it's doom soon, don't worry XD
I'm glad you find Katherine interesting! Because she's my favorite Oc :) and I love Fred & George's humor during dark times. :)
Thanks for the review. Report Review
Another lovely chapter! Katherine's history is amazingly detailed. Are there going to be more memories soon? They're fantastic to read and so interesting. Her relationship with her father is so sad. It breaks my heart when he ignores her and sends her to her room, although I guess that's only going to get worse since she found the memory. :(
Anyway, it was a great chapter and I'm looking forward to the rest of it!Author's Response: Thank you, and yes there is still a lot left to learn about Katherine, her mother, father and of course some of the other characters. Not worse it gets complex, you'll see what I mean in a couple of chaps :)
Thank you for your review and I hope to see more of you in the future! Report Review
I really love this story! Katherine and George's relationship is so sweet it makes me smile every time they interact, even when she's upset. I can't wait to see what happens next! You've done such a wonderful job with this story. :)Author's Response: Thank you I happy you love this story :) I love they're friendship and I'm so scared of turning it into anything else! I mean they're such good friends I don't wanna ruin it but alas it's not what I want it what Kat wants XD
Thank you for your review and I hope you keep enjoying my fic. Report Review
Oh, poor Katherine! And George is so awkward when he tries to say that he is sorry about her uncle...
There's a lot a dialogue in this chapter, maybe a little bit too much. I would like to know more about the thoughts and feelings of the characters.
One thing about this chapter: There are a lot of double blanks between the lines (or very short paragraphs?), which disturbes the reading a litte.
Another small mistake: When Katherine starts crying George is thinking "I just made her cry...". You have missed the quotation marks here.
I like your twins! "There's nothing wrong with detention!" :-D Or: "I'm neither. I'm your friendly neighborhood snake hater." That's just great!Author's Response: Gotcha! I didn't notice the amount of dialogue I guess maybe because when I wrote this I was pretty insecure about writing about feelings and stuff.
The spacing issue I keep trying to fix it but the editor seems to go wonky, but I'll fix that believe I know how much it can disturb reading! Lol *smacks forehead* How could I miss quotation marks XD
Thank you :) I love the twins and to see people enjoy my portrayal of them makes me happy :) (I love the snake-hate quote :P) Report Review
I like your style of writing. It's very easy to read, and feels natural. You got my attention rigth from the start.
I'm a bit confused by how Gideon and Fabian is (or isn't?) related to Katherine, but maybe that was intentional?
I like how you have managed to write Fred and George as funny as they should be!
George's fear of being separated is bittersweet, since we know what will happen in the end...
I'm going to continue with your next chapter and leave you another review.Author's Response: The confusion isn't intentional but I find it fun XD
Thank I love the twins and I try to portray them as best I could. I'll go ahead and respond you next review as well :P Report Review
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