Reading Reviews for In The Red
251 Reviews Found

Review #51, by firefly910 The Precaution

8th April 2013:
I got a little emotional reading your authors note. I guess its because I've been with you on the archives since you were posting LO and I've seen you grow so much as a writer. You post so consistently and it's always so good. I seriously wish I could fit my writing in the way you do but for some reason it just doesn't work. I do look up to you as a writer because I can see how much your writing has evolved since LO, it was good back then as well but you always hit me with certain phrases that I'm just blown away by. I wish I was around more on the forums and here so that we could talk more because I miss you Jane, I really do.

And now all the gushing is over on to the chapter.

Sirius! You adorable boy! Oh I love him as a Godfather. I always imagined him to just covet Harry so much, be so protective and proud of him. It's just so sad what happens to him and he misses Harry's life because of Azkaban and then because of his death. It's so heartbreaking because the way you portray him is exactly as I imagine he would have been. Happy-go-lucky and always so excited about everything. Harry would have been the light of his life.



I stared at that sentence for so long. She had the bracelet on, and he looked at her but he didn't recognise her. Even though she was wearing the one thing that represents their relationship.


My heart skipped because I thought for one second he might actually recognise her.

But of course he didn't. Dumbledore's magic does not fail.

And then the last bit. Ohh the memories. THAT IS GOING TO PLAY A HUGE PART IN BREAKING EVEN I KNOW IT!!

Seriously Jane, how do you do it? Every time I read one of your stories it instantly becomes a favourite. I loved ITB and I loved this one even more, so I can only imagine how Breaking Even is going to make me feel.

And then after that? I distinctly remember you mentioning an LO sequel at one point! I would love to read about Rachel again!!!

Author's Response: Ugh. This is going to make me cry again. ♥ Because out of everyone I know via HPFF, Callie, you have been with me the longest, and you are probably one of my biggest supporters, and it was your comments on LO that helped keep me writing it in the first place. Knowing someone wanted to read what I was writing KEPT me churning out chapters and discussing plot points and all those things that go into novel-writing. To know that someone sees that my writing has grown and evolved (and it's not just in my head, my thinking that) is... there aren't /words/ for that. I miss you very much, Callie. We absolutely and completely have to catch up as soon as possible!

Sirius would be such a fun godfather, because when he goes in for something, he never goes halfway. :D He is like Tumblr users in that he cannot love anything casually, and in turn I love him for it; you're always getting true emotion out of him, even if it's not always a good emotion. I think it must have killed him in Azkaban, thinking about Harry and not being able to see him, or tell him he had a godfather at all.

Pay attention to that bracelet! ;) I promise you that it crops up again in BE -- it's a fairly large plot point, and I'm actually about to write a chapter that will talk about it a good deal, if that tells you anything at all. Dumbledore's magic may not have let him recognize Beth's face... but hope is still alive.

Breaking Even is actually my favorite of the three books, I think, and I absolutely cannot wait for you to read that one. ♥ Thank you SO much for being such an invaluable support system in everything I do, though, seriously.

After Sneth? A sequel to ANAWFOS, I think -- but I definitely haven't forgotten the LO sequel, I promise! I'll write it someday, if only for your eyes, because you are so enthusiastic about it. And about everything. ♥

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Review #52, by firefly910 July 31, 1980

8th April 2013:
Baby Harry!! *dances around*

Oh it's so sad to know that this little happy bubble James and Lily are in is only going to last a year. And that, that tiny, mopped haired baby is in for such a tough life for the next seventeen years.

I really can't remember what is was that Sirius did, I must refresh my memory!!

I really am hoping that the arrival of Harry (and Neville) and the fact that Beth is Harry's Godmother is going to distract her for at least a little while. The fact that she keeps saying Severus is gone when in reality he actually hasn't, it's technically Beth that has is heartbreaking. And also the fact that she might realise Severus will think he's doing it all for Lily.

*thinks ahead to Breaking Even and wonders if that comes up*

Having been through a pretty traumatic break up of a three and a half year relationship, I can kind of imagine how she's feeling. Obviously not in relation to the danger and the memory loss. But the feeling of being at sea, like you can't attach yourself to anything because the one thing that anchored you isn't there any more; it's a horrible feeling.

You do a great job at portraying emotions Jane, as I'm sure I've told you before.

Author's Response: I think it's kind of cruel, in retrospect, putting this chapter immediately after the one before it... but it's almost like a tonic to soothe the frayed nerves. If not for everyone else, then definitely for me. :D And wee Harry is much, much too adorable for me not to put mentions of him in anywhere I see fit. You'll see that in BE as well!

Oh, you've hit on an interesting point there about Lily. ;) One I can't answer, because I do answer it in future chapters! That sounds aggravating, I suppose, but of course I can't reveal all my tricks out of hand, can I?

True story: I've never been in a relationship, and thus have never been in a break-up, so I'm actually extremely pleased that the emotions seem to be realistic, as far as that's concerned. ♥ This is why reader response is so valuable -- you all have experienced things I haven't, so you guys are the only way to know if I'm getting things right!

You are so sweet, Callie. ♥ Gah, reading all these reviews again, and responding to them -- it's seriously making my day. Thank you so much for sitting down and leaving me all of these like this!!

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Review #53, by firefly910 The Remembering

8th April 2013:

I could give you a bijillion lines of just that for this chapter.

Now as I said in an earlier review I knew Snape would lose his memory and at the end of the previous chapter I did have an inkling.



This chapter!!!

Oh wow Jane, my heart is broken for poor Beth. She sounded so desperate when Sev was telling her what was going to happen.

How is she going to live through it? Surely she's going to be depressed? The man she loves will have no memory of her. Oh wow, that's so horrible. And the way Sev was all 'I have to do this for you' it was like some dramatic scene from a really sad movie.

I just can't get over the emotions in this chapter. I'm sorry it's not a long review but please refer to line one because that's all I can think right now.

Author's Response: -biting my nails down to the quick- THIS IS ONE OF MY VERY FAVORITE CHAPTERS OF THIS ENTIRE TRILOGY, JUST SAYING. And even though you knew it was coming from glimpsing the BE story summary, I'm so glad you enjoyed it nonetheless. ♥ There are certain chapters like this where I basically hold my breath every time someone reviews them, because I want them to enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. It breaks my heart... but it's such an integral part of the ENTIRE STORY, this chapter.

Beth definitely doesn't take it well, but she also doesn't take it sitting down, and that is what makes me proudest about her. You'll see what she ends up doing about it in the next book! I want to tell you everything, but obviously I can't, and I'm just so excited for you to see how everything turns out.

So many emotions. I'm getting them secondhand from reading this review, and I wrote the chapter in the first place! Oh, don't even try apologizing to me. ♥ Your reviews are always lovely. I cannot thank you enough for them.

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Review #54, by firefly910 What Severus Told

8th April 2013:
'Was it still suicide if it didnít destroy life in its simplest definition, but merely shattered any hopes of living life as you had been doing for the past twenty-odd years?'

^ favourite line in the whole chapter. I think that sums Severus Snape up, both in this and in actual canon, perfectly.

He gave up everything he had strived for, for a girl. Whether that be Beth or Lily, he gave it all up because he could not bear to see them in danger. I can see why so many people see him as a hero when I read that sentence. He wanted power, recognition but all of that paled into insignificance when he realised who he was putting at risk because of that. He was willing to put his life in danger, to basically give up his life to become a double agent for love. WOW Jane, I got all of that from ONE SENTENCE.

*bows down to your writing skills*

Okay so this chapter gave me chills.
Like seriously.

The way you wrote Dumbledore was amazing. He is such a daunting, larger than life man that I would be almost falling of my chair like Sev did. And it was so great to see him portrayed as being a hard-ass with Sev. You don't get to see Dumbledore in that light much, purely because he isn't like that very often. But you also kept his gentleness in there. You didn't make him to hard. Dumbledore is a man who always - not looks for the good in people - but tries to understand their situation. I feel that empathy is one of his strong suits. Which I feel is why he understood Voldemort so well, he can put himself in someone else shoes.

I just loved that whole scene.


Well . . . okay, maybe I can see why someone like Peter would fall into doing what he is. He feels insignificant, worthless and he (like Sev I may add) is looking for some kind of recognition. So in a way I do feel sorry for him. But the others do love him and that's what makes me so mad!! He doesn't need to be doing what he is and he's going to lose everything because of it.

This chapter has given me a lot of feels, I don't know if you can tell.

Author's Response: ♥ I really love that line, too (if I can say it without sounding conceited). And I'm so glad that you think it hits canon-portrayal Snape so well! He is a very dedicated man, though he has many other faults, and I wanted to get that across while not shying away from his bad points. He was a Death Eater, he was nasty to Harry, yes -- but he knew what he would stand for. And he did it. And now I'm getting little swelling feelings of admiration and pride in my chest because I love his character so much!

GAH, DUMBLEDORE. I thought it was so, so important in these books to show the side of him that was less than saintly. He's all but a god in the canon books, and that generally transfers over to fic, but humans aren't perfect, and there are likewise imperfect sides to Dumbledore. I have a lot of issues with him, actually, so those got written into this story. :P He can be /scary/.

Ahaha! Poor Peter -- but not really, he totally deserves it. :D He just wants to save his own skin so much, and aren't we all like that, in some ways? Though I like to think I would essentially murder my friends for it.

YOUR REVIEW ALSO GAVE ME A LOT OF FEELS. ♥ Thank you so much for leaving it!!

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Review #55, by firefly910 A Decision and a Dilemma

8th April 2013:
I'M BACK!!! Gah I have missed fanfiction so much. I cannot wait for May 7th, semester will be done and I will have until September to immerse myself in fanfiction!!

Okay, so as it happens I have caught a glimpse of the story summary for Breaking Even, with the whole 'Snape's memory loss' thing. So whilst reading the rest of this I am going to be frantically trying to anticipate whatever causes that to happen.

Ergh. It's like coming back from holiday and putting your favourite slippers on or something.

Marauders banter abound in this chapter. LOVE IT. As always. AND IT'S JUNE.


(I will not apologise for the obscene use of capitals in this review)

So excited to read about James and Lily as parents (especially James). I am going to ignore the nasty canon plot line looming over me as I write this, I am looking forward to a happy Potter family far too much for that.

I already know I am going to die from the cuteness.

SIRIUS' guilty look - I feel I should remember something about this. Enlighten me, it's been a while.

WHAT IS SEV GOING TO DO?!?! Oh that was such an understated but dramatic way to end the chapter. (I had images of capes swishing and tense music in my head)

So glad to be back reading this story. As per this review is useless, I don't think you can really call what I leave on these chapters reviews.

On to the next one!!

Author's Response: Summer is the best for fan fiction! :D I read a massive fic novel in two weeks last summer, it was brilliant. And I'll be working on a light fan fiction novella all summer, too, so that'll be fun! I'm so glad you got a chance to come back and finish ITR. ♥ Seeing your name around here again made my day.

It seems like only yesterday I was writing about Lily first finding out she's pregnant... and now in BE I've been writing about baby Harry for the entire book! Where did time go?! I loved exploring James and Lily as parents, though. :)

Sirius's guilty look comes from something Beth didn't know about -- Sirius wrote to Dumbledore, telling him about Sev and Beth's relationship, as it were. It's not something seen, but implied by a letter he started writing at the end of a chapter.

You've found out by now, of course, what Sev intends to do! :) Ah, your reviews are never useless, dear. ♥ And I appreciate them always. Thank you very much!!

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Review #56, by Razan A Year Later

8th March 2013:
I really enjoyed your first book but I think sometimes you don't get to the point quickly enough and sometimes you don't add enough detail to the story other than that good job!

Author's Response: Hi there! I do agree with you -- some parts of the first book are slower than others, and I definitely don't claim that it's perfect. :) Part of the reason I write fan fiction is as a learning experience, and I've learned so much in writing this trilogy. The feedback I've received and the actual task of working with such a long-term plot have really taught me so much!

Anyway, enough about all that. Seriously, thank you for your comments, and for taking the time to leave a review at all. I'm glad to hear you enjoyed ITB, and I hope that you enjoy ITR, too! ♥

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Review #57, by SydneyBlack An Overdue Conversation

3rd March 2013:
:| I can't decide which pairing I like better! Beth/Severus or Beth/Sirius D:
My life is so conflicted!

Author's Response: It's okay to be conflicted! Conflict was intentionally introduced in this book where those pairings are concerned, and you definitely aren't the only person who couldn't choose. :D Things will work themselves out in the end, I promise!

I'm excited you seem to be enjoying the story thus far, anyway! ♥ Thank you so much for taking the time to review!!

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Review #58, by patronus_charm The Precaution

24th February 2013:
Ah the letter how exciting! Iíll finally get to find out whatís happened, and I canít wait, as I have feeling itís going to be good. James and Lilyís house seems really sweet, and it made me laugh that Dumbledore was the one who recommended it, it seems like something he would do!

It was so funny seeing Beth and Snape argue, especially as it was in front of Dumbledore. But I agree I was as shocked as Beth was to find him there! Aw it was so cute though, how they were both trying to take the blame for the other, but the other wouldnít let it happen. Theyíre willing to be together despite the risks, they must really love each other. I found it so funny that Dumbledore had to make sure it would be ok, heís acting as if he was their parent. Then the kiss, how cute! A lovely Sneth filled chapter!

It was really nice to see all five of them reunited, as Iím guessing it will probably be for the last time! I donít understand how Peter can be there and act all normal, even though heís being a traitor! Oh well at least the fact that Harry will be along soon will cheer me up! I laughed so much when James said if the baby was otherwise equipped! Sirius is so sure itís a boy, he really should be a seer! Or maybe heís just so determined, as that way he can create Jamesís mini me.

Aw Snape really wants Beth to be safe! Poor old Dumbledore seemed rather confused as to why Snape was there, but it was nice to see that he was agreeing to Snapeís requests:D Woo go Snape coming over to the good side! I felt so proud of him, as heís finally realising what he needs to do with his life, and all because he loves Beth and wants her to be safe! He didnít even seem to hold that much hate for James which was nice to see.

Good old Dumbledore, disappearing for a cup of cocoa, I do have to see they are a lovely thing to have though! NO HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO ME! YOU CANíT MAKE SNAPE FORGET ABOUT BETH! THEN THEREíS NO SNETH! My would just came crashing down *sob* I thought they were finally getting closer, now that he was on the good side, and we might get a proper kiss, instead of these chaste things, but no, itís all ruined! AH I JUST CANíT DEAL WITH IT! WHY? WHY? CAPITALS DONíT EVEN EXPRESS MY PAIN! R.I.P. Sneth :(

THEN THE KISS! AH I CANíT EVEN COPE WITH THE END OF SNETH! MY MIND IS GOING INTO OVERLOAD! My heart goes out for Beth, if this is what Iím going through, I canít even comprehend the pain she may be feeling! I donít even want to read on now, in case something worse happens. Aw Snape I love you, youíre just awesome, and now youíre going to go back to how you were before. She will remember, or if she doesnít Iíll remember for her!

At least Harry came along to cheer me up! I loved Siriusís reaction to it, it was so sweet. He is so sweet the way he comforted Beth! Aw I love Sirius almost as much as I love Snape! I was wondering who the godmother was, so it was really nice to see it was Beth. Thank you for giving me that chapter, it made me slightly happier, even if I know Sneth wonít be around for a while *sob* :í(.

Aw how cute that Harry and Neville went to the order meeting together! I find it so funny that they knew each other as babies, and their parents were friends, yet one event meant they were separated, and knew nothing about the past. Then Sirius waking James up when he was napping, that made me laugh, as it was just a typical thing for him to do!

Ack! Snape appeared, I didnít expect that! Poor, poor Beth, and Snape as he doesnít know how awesome Sneth was! Heís gone back to his old ways then, and Beth fainted! So dramatic, and angst fuelled, I didnít know how to deal with all of it!

YAYAYAY! Another Dumbledore and McGonagall scene, I love those two together, theyíre just awesome! It was nice to see that it wasnít Dumbledoreís idea, but Snapeís, as I didnít think he would be that mean! He still has the memories though, so there is a chance he can have them back!

In The Red, was just simply brilliant, I didnít think it could top In the Black, but it did! Your writing style is superb, and the plot is amazing, and so complex. You made Snape appear cute, and that alone should mean that you get a Dobby! And Iíve nearly caught up! So exciting! Now Iím off to Breaking Even!

-Kiana :D

Author's Response: I HAVE FINALLY REACHED THE POINT WHERE I'M CAUGHT UP TO YOUR SNETH REVIEWS. Other than your most recent on BE, of course, but I always respond to those before posting the next chapter, so I will still celebrate muchly. ♥

I'm writing chapter 21 of BE right now and I will just have you know that it's absolutely slaying me to read you get to the end of this book, and know what's in store for you, and just. Ugh. I had a mini-existential crisis the other night just thinking about what I'm going to do when I'm no longer writing Sneth on a normal basis. What are you supposed to do when nearly two full years of work is just... finished? I SHIP THEM SO HARD. I know I'll return to them, write little offshoots of their story; I am too attached not to.

Beth's safety is Severus's number one priority, and that is really both lovely and heartbreaking. He wants so much to protect her that I don't think he takes her choices into account at all, and that's really where this whole fiasco is born from. (Although I do partially blame Dumbledore. HE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN IT WAS A BAD IDEA.)

I knew from the start -- from the start of ITB, even -- that Snape and Beth were going to have their first kiss before this very painful moment for the both of them. I am very cruel in that way, but I knew that some of the pivotal moments in their relationship would come at very difficult times for the story overall. I remember my heart pounding so much writing that chapter! Hands-down one of my favorite things I've written to date. ♥

Writing baby Harry is so much fun (as I'm sure you've seen in more recent BE chapters), and it always make me feel a touch more lighthearted than I'm sure you realize others do. :P

Ohhh, keep your eye on that bracelet...

I am so, so glad you enjoyed this story, Kiana -- I really am. There is so much of ME in this story that the fact that other people have read and enjoyed it, too, is something amazing and rather indescribable. Both this and ITB have been nominated for Dobbies, and that's an honor I can't put into words!

Thank you so, so much!

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Review #59, by patronus_charm A Suspicion Confirmed

24th February 2013:
So I know that you update on Sundays, so Iím hoping I can finish In The Red, and the first chapter of Breaking Even, before chapter 2 is posted!

I rather liked having the beginning of this chapter from Jamesís perspective, as it made a change, and I liked seeing what he thought of things. He really has mature recently, with him sorting out his parentsí house, and baby Harry on the way, you can see that heís finally grown into a man. I rather liked that he and Frank are friends, as it reminds you of Harry and Neville. Itís horrible to see that the times are getting considerably darker, with Dearborn disappearing, and them having to be even more careful. You can feel the build-up to James and Lilyís deaths, and itís already making me feel a little sad.

I really love the scenes with the death eaters, as itís interesting to see what cliques theyíre in, and the dynamics of their relationship. Bellatrix and Snapeís relationship seems to be very similar to how it is in the books, both of them vying to see who is more loyal to the Dark Lord. Itís funny to see them do it, as they just seem pathetic. Go away Travers, look what youíre done! I like how youíve made Snape have feelings of discontent for a while, and now heís admitting to having them, as that makes the fact that he went to Dumbledore, somewhat more believable.

I liked the girls gossiping at the beginning of this chapter, it added some light hearted and funny moments, to the darker atmosphere. I didnít realise that Siriusís affections for Beth were so obvious that everyone was asking about them! I did feel for Mary though, finding out the person you used to have a crush on, knew all the time must have been embarrassing, as they didnít do anything about it. Itís really nice to see Alice fit in with their little gang, and I agree with Beth it must be weird to have two pregnant friends, it makes you feel as if you should join with the trend and become pregnant too!

Ah so exciting Snape and Sirius meet! All that drama and tension, you do spoil us ;D I really like how youíve made Beth a reason to divide them further, as it makes the scene in the OoP when theyíre arguing in Grimmauld Place more reasonable, if they were both fighting for the same girl. Iím so proud of you Sirius! I think it was the moment when he realised that Snape gave Beth the bracelet that he decided to change. It was almost odd to see him being nice to Snape, and admit that Beth has feelings for him, but heís maturing and itís so nice to see! Then Snapeís going to admit his feelings for her! I could die happily, now I know thatís going to finally happen.

It was so awkward when Snape came, you could just sense it in the air. With Beth agonising over why he was coming, and Snape probably practising how he would say it, you can see why there was that awkwardness. When Snape brought up the kiss, it was so cute, as he was so nervous he couldnít even finish the sentence. What have you done to me? You made me think Snape was cute, and I never would have thought that would happen?! I thought Sneth was going to be over when he admitted to listening to the prophecy, as Beth seemed angry about it! Then it was saved, and he comforted her, and I was just sitting there happily awing away. Itís so adorable seeing Snape like that, as you would have never expected him to be like, and itís so nice seeing him change for the better.

James how wrong could you be? That see nearly brought me to tears, with all the Sneth beforehand, and then this! You make me a crazy bundle of emotions! Again I can see that theyíre death is getting closer and closer, and I really donít want it to happen, as that is one of the saddest things out of the entire books, and itís only matched by Dobbyís, Siriusís and Snapeís deaths.

Sirius made me laugh so much, of course he would be rude to her neighbour! Aw Beth donít be upset Iím sure everything will be alright soon. But, Sirius what have you done? I need to know what the feelings about, and whatís in the letter! What were McGonagallís suspicious? I would write more, but I hate being left on such a good cliff-hanger, so Iím off to find out more!

-Kiana :D

Author's Response: STILL cannot believe how many reviews you left me in such a short span of time! :D Kiana, you are truly one of the best reviewers I've ever had. Seriously. The bee's knees. ♥

James has grown up so much in the course of this story! I'm very proud of him -- he's done so probably more than anyone else in this story. And there is a definite parallel between his friendship with Frank, and Harry's with Neville. And there's a definite juxtaposition with the "friendships" that the Death Eaters have among themselves, which I'm so glad you're picking up on! Then again, it's very hard to picture people like Bellatrix and Travers with true thick-and-thin friends like the Marauders, you know?

Oh, Sirius. ♥ I think he must not realize the effect he's got on girls -- or if he does realize it, he definitely didn't do a whole lot about it, since we don't know of any romantic relationships he had in canon. You know, I really don't get why so many people write him to be a playboy... but now's not the time for that rant. :P

LOVE THAT SNAPE/SIRIUS DRAMA. ♥ Anything where people are snarky and snippy and yelling at each other and are angry -- I'll love writing it, hands-down. I love a good bout of tension and drama. I'm so glad you're proud of Sirius at the end, though! I am too. :) Beth is one of his best friends in the world, apart from James, and that's why he thinks he could have a romantic relationship with her, but in the end he just wants her to be happy. And that is such a big, big step for him.

-melts in a puddle of emotions-

-MELTS INTO MORE PUDDLES OF EMOTIONS BECAUSE I HAVE SUCH SNAPE/BETH FEELS- This is totally not justified, but his mentioning that kiss brought such a smile to my face. ♥ I'm extremely proud to say that I've made many people root for Snape! Such a victory.

Ooh, that letter. Well, you know what it's about now, but... Oh, Sirius. You so-and-so. You're the absolute best, Kiana! :D Thank you so much for your reviews, seriously!

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Review #60, by patronus_charm Among Friends

23rd February 2013:
Even though Iíve had a really busy day, I couldnít not stop by and get some Sneth! Hopefully Iíll have more time tomorrow for those two :D

I loved Snapeís reaction to the kiss, it just seemed so realistic, and it was strange to see him so moved by something. I rather enjoyed seeing him connect with his emotions for once, as we donít often see that happen. You can tell he was really worried about whether she got away safely or not, and again itís odd to see him so protective over someone, and to care so much for them. I Ďm really liking this change in Snape though:D

I knew it! I knew it! The moment Snape stepped inside the Hogs Head I knew what was going to happen! Itís such a good feeling when your assumptions are proved correct, I should really replace Trelawney as the Divination teacher! It all seemed normal at first, but I was wondering if it would happen now, as the timing would be right, I just have to say I loved that appearance from the goblin, I didnít realise they all loved gambling?!

Then bam Dumbledoreís there, and when you mentioned the woman with the scarf, I knew who it had to be! I loved Aberforth grumbling away at Dumbledore, it just made the whole scene so much more authentic. Iíve always thought this was one of the most important parts of the whole HP series, given how much it shaped the future, and seeing it again made you realise how easily it might not have happened if Snape had heard the entire prophecy! I thought that was excellently done!

I thought the scene when Snape arrived at the headquarters was great. It was nice to see that his conscience was still intact, and that he had feelings of doubt about what he was going to do. If only he had listened to those feelings, it would have saved a whole lot of trouble, but then there would be no story! I quite liked Peter in the first book, but ever since he turned to the dark side my opinion of him has gone down. Even though Snapeís a death eater, and later a double agent, he does it for a reason, not just to be on the winning side, so I guess thatís why I like him. Peter on the other hand, just did it because he was scared, and heís meant to be a Gryffindor, not Snape! I still want to know the conversation between the sorting hat and Peter.

Iíve been waiting for this moment for ages, and Snape meeting old Voldy certainly didnít disappoint! I thought it was good that they didnít meet straight away, as that wouldnít have seemed believable, I mean what would Voldemort want with someone as disposable as Snape, before he reported the prophecy? It was funny to see Roark be nicer to Snape after he got branded, but I guess that now he has the dark mark, he requires a certain level of respect. How wrong Snape was about the prophecy not affecting Beth, of course it would, itís based on her best friends!

We finally got to meet the Bridgers! Iíve been waiting for this moment ever since you first mentioned her parents, as they just sounded so strange and evil, I had to see how they actually were in person! I thought it was interesting that you made her father a Gryffindor, perhaps he has done some courageous things, after all? Or he could be a Gryffindor like Peter! I can see why Beth dislikes them so much though! I would hate to be forced into an arranged marriage, and the fact that they hang out with families like the Blacks says it all really! Wow James was brave, as I would not want to even meet Bethís parents, let alone talk to them!

Beth and Snape have really got closer, if she chooses to talk to him over James! It was nice to see her talk to him, and for nothing to interrupt them for once. But how did Bethís bracelet get there, I donít recall her dropping it or losing it, maybe I was just reading too fast, and missed out that part?

How did this chapter only get 3 reviews though, it was awesome? I always rather like filler chapters as you can learn more about the characters, and without them, there would be no story!

-Kiana :D

Author's Response: I think Beth is able to pull the emotions out of Snape -- which he may or may not particularly like, since I'm rather under the impression he likes hiding them away for the most part. But there we have it! She's changed a lot about him, and he's changed things about her, and you probably think it's pretty idiotic for me to ship something so hard when I created it. But I LOVE them together. I could write Beth/Snape forever. ♥

The succession of chapters where Snape discovers the prophecy and then told Voldemort about it were deceptively hard to write. I had to stick to a LOT of canon, and I know most people have vague impressions in their head of these scenes already, even if they're not fully conscious of them. I'm at a similarly tricky chapter in BE right now, and getting over that bump is hard! But I'm glad you were astute enough to see where that was headed. ;) And I'm really glad you thought I did it justice, too!

Writing Peter in the first book was actually the hardest, because at that point he was nothing but a slightly undesirable boy -- certainly not a traitor. Here you're definitely given more free rein to not particularly like him, though. My own opinion of him's deteriorated, too. :P

Another thing I sometimes hate about Marauder stories -- and I say with no small amount of guilt that a lot of the things in this trilogy have come about solely to write away things I HATE in other Marauders stories -- is how people write the Death Eater ranks. Not everyone is Voldemort's best friend, you know? And I definitely think Snape would have had to work up to that rank. Well, that's canon. :P And providing Voldemort with the information about the prophecy was what proved to him that Snape was someone to watch and take interest in. He came from a lowborn half-blood birth; he would have been of completely no import otherwise.

And the Bridgers make an appearance at last! Well, Beth's mum was seen briefly in ITB, but that hardly counts. I have such fond memories of writing that chapter with Beth's parents in a hotel room in Orlando, and I really can't believe that was eight and a half months ago. Holy cow. Her parents are deliciously villainous, and you'll see more of them in upcoming chapters of BE. :)

You don't see Beth drop/lose her bracelet, but it basically just came loose and fell off her wrist. I've lost several pieces of jewelry the same way. :D I'm not sure why it only had 3 reviews, but it's no matter to me! Reviews do dwindle the further I get into a story, and that's okay. That's one of the reasons it means so much to me that you return so faithfully without fail to each chapter -- I know I can count on you. ♥

Thank you for reviewing!!

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Review #61, by patronus_charm Missions and Mudbloods

22nd February 2013:
Siriusís absence does seem a little unusual. Perhaps heís come to his sense and realised that Beth doesnít like him, and heíll have to wait it out like James did for Lily, or give up on her. Or James might have had a word with him, about her talking to Snape again. Iím more inclined to think the latter; as Sirius doesnít always seem to be with it, so itís more likely heíll need that fact pointed out to him!

I was really glad to find out that you included the bit about the death eaters wanting James and Lily on their side, as I think thatís such a major thing to include yet so many people forget to do so. Itís so nice to see how much youíve stuck to canon, as itís great to see that someone else does pay attention to what JK said.

I loved Snapeís present for Beth, it seemed really heartfelt, and he did seem genuinely upset that he couldnít find a falcon to put on the bracelet! Iím starting to worry about what might occupy him on Bethís birthday though, his thoughts were rather ominous, and that suggest something big is going to happen.

I knew this moment was coming, and it certainly lived up to my expectations. It was all going so well, and there was some lovely Jilly fluff with them discussing baby names, and then Sirius has to see the bracelet and it all went downhill from there. I liked how you made James stick up for Beth, as I thought he would stick by his best mate, and support his argument, so it was nice to see that you didnít take the easy route. I do feel for Sirius, with him liking Beth, and thinking that he stood a chance, and then for him to find this out, and his dreams to come crashing down, it seemed like the only likely thing to happen.

We got to see James and Siriusís bromance again! Oh how Iíve missed that. It was so strange seeing James being so pragmatic, and being the one to make sensible decisions, given that heís a prospective father, he should be taking some control over his life now! Sirius seemed really touched that James made him Harryís godfather, and I wonder what he would have been like if James and Lily survived, and whether he would have done all those things he said he would. Itís rather sad to see that all Siriusís hopes and dreams came crashing down.

That whole Snape thing seems to have really troubled Sirius, you can see it with him looking at the map, and going back to The Three Broomsticks. Itís as if heís trying to go back to his time at Hogwarts where everything seemed to be fine, and everything went his way. It again shows how much real life changed them, and how unexpected it all can be.

I saw Sarah pop up in your story again! That was such a nice thing to do, and Iím tempted to copy that idea, and put my beta in my story as well!

That was such a shocking chapter, first Snape was having second thoughts about whether Ďto play with his foodí, and you could feel how much he didnít want to do it. Then bam! Beth appears, and thereís just so much confusion over whatís really happening, that youíre just left feel scared over whoís getting attacked and what the outcome of it all will be. The ending was great there was an almost kiss, and I was just awing throughout. I canít wait to see a proper kiss! Itís been long overdue;D

-Kiana :D

Author's Response: Sirius definitely isn't always with it. :D Poor bloke -- he's got to delude himself into believing he's in love, just because he's lonely. I know I keep saying this, but a hug or two (from someone other than Beth, so as not to confuse him further!) would really do him wonders.

Can I just say how seriously glad I am that you're well-versed enough in canon to appreciate that I'm trying to stick to it, too? That sounds like a weird thing to say, but I've worked very hard to try and keep these books in canon as much as possible, and it's always fantastic knowing my hard work isn't going unnoticed. I don't know why a lot of people DON'T, especially considering that part of that pivotal prophecy named Harry as born to parents who've thrice defied Voldemort.

Snape's present for Beth, as you may or may not have figured by now, has important implications for later plot devices. ;) And it's also a really sweet gesture, if I do say so myself! Plus everyone gives rings and necklaces in stories, and maybe they have greater romantic symbolism, but a nice bracelet should be appreciated, too.

Writing Sirius and Beth's confrontation about the bracelet was one of my favorite things to write in this entire story (did I really write that last summer?!)! I love high-tension, emotion-heavy scenes. Namely where people are screaming at each other. Which is a bit odd... But one thing to remember is that Sirius doesn't like Beth -- not really. He loves her as a sister, but thinks he can have with her what James has with Lily, and deludes himself into thinking that's love. It's a completely different thing entirely. :)

James and Sirius's bromance crops back up in BE, too! I love writing it; those two have such great chemistry of the non-romantic sort, if you know what I mean. (Although I'm sure James/Sirius fic exists, come to think of it.) I always sort of see James being the more rational of the two, and I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because Harry is much more pragmatic than Sirius in some canon instances. Who knows? But it's sort of supported in the fact that Sirius "retreats" into the past when he's upset, pining for times when things perhaps made a bit more sense to him.

Sarah can't stay out of this story. :D Which is appropriate, because her mark is EVERYWHERE. You're going to see her one more time, in BE, but that's all I'll tell you on that front!

I was quite cruel, holding out on that kiss, wasn't I? :3 TENSION. Oh, I really do miss writing these sorts of Beth/Severus scenes. I didn't realize I would until they understandably dwindled in number. It makes me want to write some spin-offs, just to get my kicks!

Well, you know what I'll say now: Thank you, thank you, thank you for reviewing! ♥

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Review #62, by patronus_charm Bonding Time

22nd February 2013:
I really like how youíre tying events into events which happen later. First it was with Remus and him wanting to do his transformations by himself, now itís with Sirius being accused of being a spy. All these little things, show how the more major things developed, and itís so clever that you included them as it makes the story more believable, as those plots donít just jump straight at you. Then Peter being ill, I may be reading too much into this, but is this the first sign of him becoming a death eater?

I really loved Remus and Siriusís reaction to the news that Lily was pregnant, it was so realistic, and it was nice to have some light hearted fun, in the otherwise dark book. I think the best part was Sirius punching James, it just seemed so typical of him, and I wished I could have been there, to join with all the fun.

I really liked the fluffy Sneth moments, and I would pay anything to see Snape in muggle clothing, as I would have never thought that would happen. I liked how you showed that both of their parents would have disapproved of what they were doing for the war effort, as it shows again how similar they are.

Typical Sirius just strolling into someoneís house, and acting as if it was his! I almost thought that Beth was right about his house burning down, as it does seem like something he would do, but itís a mission. The last mission was so exciting Iím hoping that this one will be just as eventful, and whether theyíll be any Sneth moments during it as well.

Lucius seemed as evil as ever! He still thought then that he owned the place, and that was without all of his power, perhaps itís an inbred Malfoy thing? And he knows about the Order. Well I kind of guessed he would, considering they know about the death eaters, but itís almost scary how intent he seemed on the Order being destroyed. Then their report to Moody was great, and he was still the sarcastic person we all know and love! He really does come up with the best lines, especially the one about Sirius blowing up stuff; heís still acting like a child!

I really liked that you explained the reason why Peter joined Voldemort, as thatís always one of the most puzzling things of the whole book, and it was nice to his reason in context, as it helped you understand his choice a little more. I couldnít help but feel a little sympathy towards Peter, as it must have been tough, always feeling inferior to your friends who are meant to be your equals and the dark lord would give him power, and therefore he went to him. It was really nice seeing this, as in most other Marauder stories itís not really explained, your just meant to know, but I much preferred your version.

The idea of Peter having to make an unbreakable vow was great, as it again helped explain why he did certain things. I can understand up to a certain extent why he would join Voldemort, but for him to go and betray James and Lily, it seemed too far. If he was locked into doing it by an unbreakable vow though, I could then understand why he would do it, as he was really given no choice, but to accept the vow, or be killed instantly.

What was that Sirius? Why did you go and grab her hand? At least heís agreeing with me about why he did it. It was a little sad seeing James realise that he didnít know Beth as well as he used to, as they were so close before, but I guess everyone moves on. He was right about her not needing Sirius though, and Iím not just being biased towards Sneth here (Ok maybe I am being a little biasedÖ.), but I feel the only person who can really save Beth is Snape, and thatís because theyíre both so complex, and so similar, no one could suite them as well as they suite each other.

-Kiana :D

Author's Response: I'm glad you like those little canon snippets I tried to include! One thing I didn't realize before sitting down and actually writing this story was how many little things I'd have to work at including if I wanted the story to be as canonically accurate as possible -- which I did. Sometimes it's been tough, sticking to a not-set-in-stone canon, so hearing compliments from people like you really makes me feel great, knowing you appreciate the small things. :)

Sirius is so light-hearted, even in these chapters, and I never realized it until your reviews. But it's so true! Punching James, acting like he owns the world... he changes alongside Beth at the end of this story, and ugh. More hugs for him are in order just for that.

I loved writing that mission scene, though, and I have very clear memories of sitting in a backwoods coffee shop, waiting on my dad, who was working, and busting it out -- I probably wrote over 2,000 words of that in a sitting. EVIL LUCIUS. ♥

I thought it was extremely important, almost pivotal, to explain why Peter went across to join the Death Eaters. Not only was it something that /completely/ affected the entire series, but I'd never found a satisfactory explanation for it anywhere, and I wanted to do it justice. I'm so glad you liked my interpretation of events! I think it's not unreasonable to think he would have used an Unbreakable Vow -- Bellatrix and Snape both knew about it in HBP, so it might have been a common tool for that side. And it does mean that Peter had no choice but try his hardest to help the Death Eaters, no matter what that meant.

MORE HUGS FOR SIRIUS. ♥ Honestly... I just feel so, so bad for him. :(

Thank you for reviewing!!

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Review #63, by patronus_charm Accusations and Agreements

22nd February 2013:
I felt so proud of Snape when he admitted that his patronus had changed to Beth. He must have known it would take a lot to persuade her, and you could sense he was a little nervous beforehand, but who could blame him? What he was about to reveal, was going to change his life. Beth and Snape seem to have a sort of magnetic attraction to each other, so he had to reveal it, as it seems as if they canít not have each other in their lives.

It was nice to see that despite the fact that Beth knew that he killed one of those men, and that he had the dark mark, that she was still willing to keep in touch with him. I guess that shows how theyíre magnetically attracted to one of another again. If it was me, I would be running away, as I donít think I could talk to murderer, as I would just be thinking about what they had done, but this is Sneth, so itís completely different!

What was that the end, I did not expect that! I know it said that there was Sirius/OC in this story, but I thought that would be with Marlene, not Beth! Whatís going to happen to Sneth, this canít happen! Ah Sirius why are you doing this? Youíre running the perfect romance, which is just getting back on track! If itís just because James has gone and got married, and left their bromance, itís a silly reason! This canít happen! Sorry for this outburst, but it was very necessary!

It was funny seeing Jamesís bemusement as to why Sirius was acting so strangely. I can understand why he felt that why, as Iím with James here, where did his sudden interest in Beth come from. The fact that heís considering marrying her is just so shocking, and almost hilarious at the same time! Poor Sirius, it probably comes from him not having a stable home environment, so he seeks attachment with Beth.

So Alice and Lily are both pregnant how exciting! I think the name Elvendork has so much more going for it than Harry, honestly they should have listened to Sirius! Poor James having to handle a pregnant wife, and a friend whoís deliriously in love! It was so funny see the reactions to both pieces of news ;D

James really is one of the loveliest people in the world. Everyone says that Harry got his kindness from Lily, but I think he got it from James as well. It was just so sweet when he told Beth that it was alright that she and Snape were talking again, and I guess he can understand how hard it is to let go of someone youíve loved for so long, as he has a lot of experience with Lily. He must be so conflicted right now, knowing that Beth doesnít like Sirius but Snape, but Sirius still likes her. All this drama and angst, is getting too much for me to handle!

I can understand Bethís excitement for the Order meetings, as it must be cool feeling knowing that youíre making a difference to the world, and people will look back on you, and think that you helped change the world. Why canít it be real, so I can join the Order? It just sounds so exciting!

Siriusís temper is immerging again! I can understand why, and it was completely reasonable that he reacted in such a way. I would hate to be discriminated against, just because of who my family are, or what they did. You almost forgot that Beth is in the same position as him, so it was nice for him to be able to have someone who can understand and sympathise with his position.

Eek theyíre going to meet again, I canít wait, I mean if itís dramatic as the previous times, itís certainly something to look forward to, well any moments between them are something to look forward to!

-Kiana :D

Author's Response: I owe you another apology -- this is getting to be a habit! -- for STILL not having finished responding to all these reviews you left me. Life's hectic, school's crazy, but I still should have had responses for you before now. Thank you so much for being so patient and understanding!

I'm proud of Snape for having the guts to tell Beth about his patronus, too. ♥ And although I made the ship up, I totally agree they need to have one another in their lives! This chapter was one of those lovely ones where I got to hardcore ship Sneth, instead of making excuses as to why they couldn't be together. I think both of them showed that -- Severus in telling Beth about his patronus, and Beth in overlooking, however briefly, the things she knew he'd done, because she was accepting the man he was, faults and all.

There is a touch of Sirius/OC in this story, as I know you know now, but it is nearly completely one-sided, and even then, Sirius never really loves Beth. :( The poor man is just very lonely and kidding himself, and oh, he just needs so many hugs at varying points in his life. It's partly from his unstable home life, but it's also because he feels that Lily has replaced his role in James's life, and he thinks Beth can fill the void, despite all the things she's gone through with Severus the previous year.

I LOVE James. ♥ I think I've said it before, but I had no idea how much I'd love writing him in this story, and he really feels like the best brother figure Beth's got, too me. I do like to think that some of Harry's kindness comes from his father. I actually think some of his sarcastic nature comes from his mother, although I imagine sarcasm was also a pretty big defense mechanism for him, growing up with the Dursleys.

I'll leave you to join the Order! I think I'd be much too much of a coward to do it myself. :P But that's me in a nutshell, I suppose.

Note: Beth and Severus are ALWAYS going to have drama when they're together. :D It's inevitable.

I SERIOUSLY AM SO SORRY IT'S TAKING ME FOREVER TO RESPOND TO YOU. ♥ Thank you, once again, for all these reviews!

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Review #64, by patronus_charm The Patronus Charm

22nd February 2013:
I keep on leaving these insanely long review! I would make them shorter so theyíre not such a pain to reply to, but then I couldnít say everything I wanted to!

When Beth was looking in the mirror, I guess it was echoing my thoughts about how she seems like a different person, and thatís due to her being in the real world and maturing. I do rather like this new Beth, as she doesnít seem as naÔve as the older one, and she seems to be more wise, and prepared for the real world. Probably her heart-break over Snape helped her mature a lot, as it made her grow as a person.

I really liked Aliceís characterisation in this, as she just seemed so kind, and protective over Beth, basically exactly how I imagined her to be. She just seemed like such a strong character, and she wasnít afraid to make hard decisions such as sending Beth to go and sit under the bridge. I hope that she features more, as sheís turning out to be an awesome character. I guess it was good thing that she was sent there, as that way she got to see Snape!

Wahaha! I loved chapter 6 all those Sneth moments, you really do spoil us with them! It was just so awesome, you could sense the tension and how much they still cared for each other, I was just a bundle of nerves, as I really couldnít anticipate what would happen next, it was just brilliant that chapter, and I think itís safe to say one of the best so far. I loved the bit where Snape finally stopped skirting round the edges, and confronted Beth over why she ignored him and ran away. It was just awesome, as you could sense that they still had deep feelings for one another, even though they both denied it!

Then when he grabbed her wrist, ah it was just awesome, as you could sense all their conflicting emotions. You made me into a bundle of mixed emotions then, it was just awesome, I think I love Sneth way too much now! Then when he said he would owl, it proved to me that he still loved her. Iím sorry if that didnít make much sense, I just canít really explain how brilliant that scene was.

I think this is one of the best, and most believable romances I have ever come across, and it just seems to natural, and I donít think anyone would want Sneth to be apart! And there was some adorable Jilly scenes. You know you really are awesome, by giving us these brilliant scenes all the time! I still canít decide whether Sneth is overtaking my love for Jilly or not, and that is saying something as Jilly are my OTP!

I found it funny that Amycus told Snape that he was an amateur, yet later on Snape is one of Voldemortís most trusted comrades, and he actually admits that he was sorry to kill him, so the tables will turn for Snape!

I see that Snapeís worst memory has replaced his previous one. It was rather sad to see how much that had affected him, and the fact that this was now his worst memory just shows, that itís his worst one unnecessarily. If only Beth knew the truth, I guess she will find out one day, and I canít wait for that day to happen!

A great ending as well, Iím so glad that his patronus has changed, as that now truly reflects his feelings, and eek he asked to see her, she better say yes!

-Kiana :D

Author's Response: I know it's taken me a long time to respond to these -- but trust me, it's not because it's a pain! Long reviews make me so, so happy, and you'd better believe it. ;) I'm still insanely appreciative that you took the time to leave me any reviews at all!

I think the newer Beth that you get more of in ITR/BE is a bit less naive, and she knows slightly more about the world than her seventh-year self -- which is probably true for all of us as we grow up. I think heartbreak did aid in that, although it's sad to think of it that way. :(

I loved writing Frank and Alice in this story! I'd never really gotten the chance to before, other than in a one-shot I wrote about Neville where they were already in St. Mungo's. I will admit that having Alice send Beth away was probably more of a plot device than anything, although I'm glad you thought it fit her character too. ;) How about those Sneth moments?! I can still remember how ridiculously giddy I got writing those bridge chapters -- it really doesn't feel like that long ago, though it was probably a year at least. Severus and Beth finally realized that being upfront about their problems actually gets them resolved, eh? But then again, probably not. :P

I'm sort of biased on Sneth, of course, but I HUGELY adore the fact that you think this romance is one of the most believable you've seen! So much of my effort in planning and writing these books /was/ trying to make the romance something that could actually happen in real life, minus the magic and all that. I've come to love writing James/Lily so much more, too, and these books really have just done wonders for my confidence in myself. Hearing such wonderful feedback from reviewers like you (especially knowing how much you like James/Lily!) puts the biggest smiles on my face, and makes me want to keep going and keep improving my writing.

Snape's worst memory has been replaced, sure -- another indication, somewhat more subtle, of Beth sort of taking over the romantic role Lily once held in Snape's life. :D I know you've finished ITR by now, but it's so fun to go through and see the thoughts you had while reading it!

Thank you so much, once again, for all these reviews! And also once again, please do forgive me for how long it's taken to respond. I'm trying to sit down today and knock out a whole bunch of them, so expect more responses quite shortly! ♥

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Review #65, by patronus_charm Severus's Task

22nd February 2013:
Iím determined to finish In The Red, before you update Breaking Even again, so prepare for a lot of reviews!

So itís been an exciting year for Beth then? I can see why Sirius would be getting excited by the sight of the dark lordís sympathisers. I do feel a little for him, that heís been denied action for so long, but I guess Alice, Frank and Mad-Eye know what theyíre doing. I saw that there were no mentions of her seeing Snape, in the year that had gone. I guess that was the only natural thing, as the way they left things wasnít the best. I do hope that there are some Sneth scenes soon, as theyíre just awesome!

You can see how much theyíre changed since entering the real world. Poor Beth being broke, I guess instant noodles do lose their appeal, if thatís all you can eat. With James as well you can see the changes now that heís a married man, and Lily is now his priority. Even though itís only the first chapter you can sense how much theyíve changed and matured. I canít wait to see what Peterís like, and whether heís already defected to the other side or not.

Alice and Frank do seem lovely! They remind me a lot of Neville, well they would considering their his parents, but some people charactised relatives completely differently, and makes you wonder how they can be related. The fact that Beth puts so much emphasis on their loyalty, reminded me so much of Neville, as heís very loyal as well. I mean look how he stood up to the trio in PS, and that was all for Gryffindor.

I really felt for Sirius, and he was horrible seeing how cut up he was over Regulusís death. I thought that was done very well, because though they were on opposing sides, they were brothers, and blood is thicker than water.

Ooh and how exciting they get their first mission! I hope my assumptions from the last book are proved correct, about Beth meeting Snape while on one! Then there will finally be some Sneth moments. Iím really looking forward to this mission, as I canít wait to see how Sirius and Beth will cope when they come face to face with death eaters for the first time.

Snapeís dream was wonderfully one, I guess the dusty ballroom could symbolise how stagnant Beth and Snapeís relationship is, and that it doesnít seem to be recovering at the moment. I really liked how you described his disdain of not being admitted into the Dark Lordís inner circle straight away. It was interesting to learn more about how this cult works, as I do find the dark lord and his death eaters very fascinating to read about.

I rather like the dark turn this story has taken, and it would have been the natural way to go. I mean Voldemort was growing stronger, and they were no longer inside the protective walls of Hogwarts so it was bound to get stronger, and I think it was wonderfully done, as you get a real sense of the fear and tension, everyone must have been feeling.

I was really glad that Snape felt sick at the prospect of killing muggles. I think that all death eaters must have felt that at some point, as they must have a drop of humanity in them, and it was just so horrible, as the muggles were just having a good time, and they didnít know about the carnage which was about to unfold. You showed how Snape was questioning his actions brilliantly, and you could really sense that he was being pulled into two directions, and he didnít know which way to go.

I really hoped that Snape would listen to his conscious and not go ahead with the killings, but that would have meant an almost certain death for himself. Iím guessing that explosion is Sirius and Beth, while Iím hoping it is, theyíll like the Dream Team, in my head ;D

Four amazing chapters and I expect the other thirty to be equally amazing, if not more!

-Kiana :D

Author's Response: Phew. It is just taking me FOREVER to answer these reviews for you. I'm really sorry about that! ♥ It's no slight on the reviews themselves, to be sure!

Beth saw nothing of Snape in the year between books, definitely. Which would suck, but then again, she thinks she's done with him. ;) It really surprised me how different these characters seemed just sitting down to write ITR for the first time -- they sounded so unlike their Hogwarts selves overnight, and I couldn't believe it! Over a year later, I remember that quite clearly. :P

It's neat that Neville's parents remind you of him! I was attempting that; I want James and Lily to sound a bit like Harry, too, because it is important to make them similar, I think. There's a lot about family in these books, I'm realizing now: Beth's family, James and Lily starting a family, Sirius's family, the Longbottoms. I've never quite noticed that before... but family is huge, really.

Snape's dream is one of my favorite parts of this book! :3 I wanted it to be able to be analyzed, and coming up with it was a bit tricky, but I am immensely pleased with the result. The dust is his life with Beth, which he feels has crumbled; Beth's footsteps toward him have faded, showing her walking away, which he feels he has. (Again -- /so much/ of this story would have been resolved if people actually talked to each other instead of brooded and sulked, but where's the fun in that?)

ITR is dark in my head -- literally, color-wise, and I think that's why the first four or five chapters all take place at night. :D I'm glad you like the darkness! I LOVE writing darker, angstier things, and that's what I generally do write. The uncertainty, the war, the tension, the things unsaid... I thrive on it! ♥

You can talk big, but in the end, you're going to have to come to terms with the fact that you're a killer -- and Snape didn't realize that until it came time to do it himself. Death Eaters, again, are human people, no matter how twisted their morals, and I love exploring humanity. I'm just thrilled, basically, because you're picking up on all this stuff about my story, and I'm grinning like mad in the middle of lecture right now. I'm nostalgic for my own story!

Thank you so much for taking the time to review, Kiana!! And again, I'm dreadfully sorry for how long it's taking me to respond to reviews. This semester is CRAZY but I am trying! :)

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Review #66, by Jchrissy Epiphany

4th February 2013:
Oh god. Firm James is my favorite kind. I love when he shows that he is a leader, and him setting Sirius straight in this was just perfect. PERFECT.

But then we get back to the root of it all. James understands they canít stop Sirius from making a decision. He wants to protect Beth just as much as Sirius, but Sirius is still so young (and god you have to just love him for it) and protective that he believes he can protect anyone he loves from anything. And itís just not realistic, but he believes that it should be. I love that, even while his actions were bad, his intentions really were good.

Sirius opening the Marauders map is sort of bitter sweet, isnít it? We get so much of the feeling that he just misses it all in this chapter. Itís so weird to think that just a few short while ago they were still in school, still able to be as normal as possible with the war so close to the outside. I canít wait to read ITB one day, btw.

Anyway, itís so hard to stay angry with Sirius for his actions with so much insight in this chapter.

Heís such a storm. He needs a hug ♥

Thank you for another amazing chapter, mídear ♥

Author's Response: Firm James is my favorite, too! How are we so alike?! :P Oh, I'm so glad you liked him here. And especially coming from someone who wrote such a popular James/Lily -- it really does mean so much.

It's interesting (for me) to think that James and Sirius essentially want the same thing for Beth: For her to be safe, yet happy. And yet both of them at this point in the story have such different ideas about what that means for her. Sirius tends to lean more towards "safe" while James understands the risks she is taking to make her happy. And yet you're right, because Sirius's intentions really WERE good. He just... the actions weren't nearly so.

I think he, too, more than any of them, misses the sort of innocence that went along with their Hogwarts days. Things really have changed so much since ITB for all of them. :D I would love for you to someday read it! But no rush, of course -- you're so busy, and it's not going anywhere.

He does need a hug. ♥ Thank you so much for this review too, dear. I honestly just cannot tell you what it means to me to know that you're still reading this story. Gratitude of this size cannot be put into words!!

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Review #67, by Jchrissy The Truth Revealed

4th February 2013:
This started off with so much warms. Sirius, why'd you have to mess all that up?

But at the same time I really understand where he's coming from. Though you know my feelings for Sirius, poor guy. I'd defend him for anything, probably. But you still made it obvious that under his...not so nice way... there were very good intentions. Severus *is* one of them. But he'd never get Beth hurt. But his could very well hurt Beth, but she's a big girl and that's her decision. It's just all so confusing.

Sirius has such a special place in her heart... this kind of fighting makes me so sad for her. She was so afraid to tell them and he reacted just how we didn't want him to. But I'm so happy you wrote it that way, because it stays very true to his character. And now they're going to have to kiss and make up quickly. Well, maybe not the kiss... I've decided that maybe they aren't the best together... and maybe Severus wouldn't be TERRIBLE for her ;).

I was kind of sad that Remus and Peter weren't there for the baby names :(. Well, not Peter as much because he's already gone bad.. but Remus! But this was written so beautifully with the group of them, they were just so happy and warm until the big Severus stuff happened. I know i've said this before, but i love that Beth is friends with the group of guys and that her and Lily are friends in a -- you're married to my best friend so we're friends-- sort of way. It's just really realistic, I think.

Another amazing chapter, m'dear ♥

Author's Response: Fact: Sirius is extremely good at messing things up. D: Although you're right in that I do see, to a point, where he is coming from. He's extremely loyal and wants the best for all his friends, but sometimes he thinks he knows what that is better than they do, and that's where conflicts arise. I'm glad you found his reaction true to his character still! I try hard to keep it constant, as I know I've told you at one time or another in the past. I'm just happy I've converted you to Snape/Beth, Jami! (And if you're not 100% convinced... let me have my moment. ♥)

I love Marauders warmth. :3 It's one of my favorite things, I think, in this story -- how they're just one big, happy group, who just seem to have a lot of little side problems. I still miss writing them in the Hogwarts setting, too. And I always thought that Lily wasn't ONE of them, you know? I really do see her as mostly being friends with Beth because of James, and I know that she's a character of my own invention, but it still means a lot to me that you find it realistic.

Gah. This response is coming to you so late, and I'm so sorry that it's taken me so long. I promise, I'm going to try and be better about responses, I swear. I always make these fantastic goals and actually make headway toward them, and then someone sits down and reviews a ton in one go and I'm overwhelmed again. :P But anyway! Thank you so, so much -- it was fantastic to hear from you again, Jami!!

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Review #68, by tragicYETmagic The Precaution

30th January 2013:
I hoped that Dumbledore would keep the memories!
I know he's a great supporter of love so it's hard to imagine him destroying them. The ending was a little unresolved but I actually like it. When Beth realises that Severus truely does not remember her I felt like crying but the conclusion brings back the hope that I lost, which then leads perfectly to Breaking Even. I've loved this story so much. Just when I thought I knew what was coming a new twist in the plot showed up and it really does make it an enjoyable read. Well done, I will definitely be counting the days until the final installment.

Magic xxx

Author's Response: There is hope yet! :) And your comment on his support of love is actually a very apt one, and I swear you've read my mind. You'll see why towards the end of Breaking Even!

Your reviews have been so appreciated, and I hope you know just how much they truly did mean to me. ♥ Seeing your name back after new updates never, ever failed to put a smile on my face.

Thank you so much -- and I'm looking forward to seeing your thoughts on Breaking Even, too!!

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Review #69, by THIS IS SARAH'S GHOST The Precaution

21st January 2013:
He was nearly more protective of Harry than James and Lily were, she thought idly, watching him stand as close to Hestia as he could manage, on the pretense of idle chatter.
- And just like that, I love Sirius more than ever. No matter what other irksome things he does, he's so adorable and genuine and honest to the point where you'd look at him and expect to see that he's transparent or something. There was a line someone said on 30 Rock that said 'Being a parent is like wearing your heart outside of your body', which is so true, and for some reason that reminds me of Sirius, too. Because he wears his heart everywhere. It's so incredibly unfair that he ended up having such a horrible life. I don't think I can ever forgive JKR for giving him the truly horrific existence that she did. Having a few happy memories of the better days in no way justifies the pain she gave him.

"When you have kids, Sirius" - I was just starting to get over my emotional Sirius feels and then you go and say that and remind us that he basically has no future. DO YOU DO THIS TO ME ON PURPOSE. FORGET SPARING LILY AND JAMES, I WANT YOU TO SPARE SIRIUS. As a personal favor. CAN YOU DO THAT PLEASE. (Please please please please please please please)

I just finished reading this chapter and now I don't even know where to begin, it feels.

You should have seen my face when Severus walked into the room. I had my hand over my mouth. And then he had to turn and look at her. And I should have known you'd do something like that because it's so heartbreaking and perfect and beautiful to have him stare haughtily at her group, not feeling one iota of anything except for dislike, while Beth silently endures a meltdown. She's far from getting over this. She still wears the bracelet, and she's going to have to continue to see him at meetings... And I was just like her in that I thought maybe that if he looked at her, he would feel /something/. Just a twinge, or some blurred memory, or the feeling that something very valuable had been taken from him. And I wonder if Severus left himself any clues...but of course he wouldn't do that. He was very invested in the plan.

I want to take those memories and force them down his throat so that they can be together. If Voldemort finds out about her she can just turn into a falcon and he can keep her as a pet.

This story. ♥ The emotions in it are like a roller-coaster. I love it even more than In The Black, which was previously my favorite story on the archive. But this one has evolved from that story, obviously, and now takes first place. Your stories are what will keep me clicking on HPFF, coming back to the archive every Sunday or every other Sunday or whatever you decide to do. I feel so privileged (here comes the sappy end-of-story gushing) to have you as a friend and so grateful that you shared this story with the world. No one updates as consistently as you do, making each chapter even better than the last. No one writes Sirius like you do. No one writes Severus like you do. No one writes James like you do. Simply put, you are the ultimate authority on the marauders and this will always, always, always be my marauders headcanon. JKR herself would not deny Beth being a member if she were to read these stories.

♥ Can't wait until February!!!

Author's Response: I /just/ got done extolling you and your love of Sirius and I am giggling to myself because of how spot-on I am. Ten points to Rachel. ♥ Not a single person in this world understands and appreciates Sirius like you do. People always write him as this dark, broody playboy and you never see it, because you see his true character, and that is what is so great about having you hear to comment on him here. You see things in him I didn't even intend to write, and his entire characterization basically came from you anyway, so that is unsurprising.

You know, I bet JKR's like me. She gave all the Marauders such unhappy existences and was probably pleased to do it. We are kindred spirits ~ I STILL OWE YOU FAVORS BUT I CANNOT PROMISE I CAN GRANT THE ONES YOU ASK. FORGIVE ME. ♥

Beth is fully never, ever going to get over Severus. Ever. And I don't want to say too much, ofc (but I think you already know what I'm concealing anyway), but even in BE when she has the option, she doesn't take it. Sev has affected her like in too prominent of a way, and in part that is being melodramatic... but in part it's also true. And even though it's risky, I'm almost 100% she never takes off the bracelet once. (Just went and checked, and nope. As far as the reader knows, she is still wearing it.)


I am honored beyond belief that this is your favorite story on the archives -- simply blown away. In all seriousness, how many people can say that their all-time favorite fan fiction author ranks one of their own stories so highly? I'm going to guess that number's pretty small. If you are privileged to have me as a friend, then I am doubly so, because you kick me in the butt to get me writing, and listen to /everything/ I have to say or whine about where this story is concerned, and just talk to me and treat me like a person worth listening to and write so beautifully yourself and I am so, so, so lucky to count you among my closest friends.

♥ ♥ ♥

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Review #70, by SARAH'S FEELS ARE DEAD July 31, 1980

21st January 2013:
Awww yiss, if no one butts in before I get the chance to review the next chapter, that makes me the 200th reviewer! AND YOU KNOW HOW LONG I'VE BEEN WAITING TO BE THE REVIEWER ON A HUNDREDTH MARK.

P.S. It's me, I'm just not logged in.

Okay typing as I read this because I don't want to forget to mention anything. Stab in the feels there with mentioning the passage of time since Severus had his memories ROBBED FROM HIM. Okay he was a willing participant, but still. It made me lose hope that he would only have his memories gone for like an hour before everything was restored and...and now I'm starting to wonder things. Like... Hmm...

You have no idea how much anticipation I have to see Beth find out this is all because of Sirius's big mouth. Sirius leaking confidential information to Dumbledore made them think there was an actual spy, a real threat, and as much as I adore him I just really really want to see him get what's coming to him for that. I want to see Beth transfigure his head into a giraffe's butt or something. The fact that I have been looking for this to happen in every single chapter and it has STILL not happened; YOU HAVE NO IDEA THE LEVEL OF SJDKFJSKDFJ I AM FEELING. And I know Severus did it because he wants to protect her, but I just want to blame Sirius.

No. No. I am not ready for Harry to be born. Stuff him back up there. I am being perfectly serious. This puts James and Lily on the clock, and for the millionth time, please do not kill them. UGH. WHO AM I KIDDING. YOU HAVE PROBABLY BEEN LOOKING FORWARD TO KILLING THEM OFF FOR MONTHS. YOU'LL WEAR A PARTY HAT WHILE YOU TYPE THEIR DEMISE.

-gross, hopeless sobbing in my corner-


He cared so much about you.

Oh my God.

I HAVE TEARS IN MY EYES. THE PAST TENSE WITH 'CARED' INSTEAD OF 'CARES'. It feels like he's dead and I feel a little bit empty inside right now. :'( He feels so lost. He feels like a stranger and I haven't even seen him yet since the procedure. I'm not sure I want to. I've been holding off on reading this because a little bit of me really does not want to see what he's like now when he's not in love with Beth. And to watch Beth cope...she seems so utterly alone now even when surrounded by friends...

I feel like the angry raincloud that sits over happy people and just rains on them. Sirius is dancing around because Harry's born and he's got a godson and all I can think about is that he will have so little time with Harry, and pretty soon he'll blink and Harry will be 13 years old, half terrified of him and half wanting to murder him.

"she if anyone could talk sense into him" UMM EXCUSE ME. Lily, you missed that boat. You have cold-shouldered him for years and you think you still have a whit of influence over him? You know what, I hope her labor was hard. I hope it hurt a LOT.

The question remains: Where exactly is Beth when Harry's older? His godfather's in prison, but what is Beth up to? YOU HAD BETTER NOT KILL HER. I WARN YOU.

-runs to the next chapter on swift wings-

Author's Response: YOU HAVE WAITED SO LONG TO REVIEW ON A HUNDREDTH MARK. (P.S. Thank you for identifying yourself, I was lost at first.)

No revelations on if Severus is going to get his memories back. -waggly eyebrows- Although you remember the snippet I showed you last night, and you may or may not pick up a clue from there. I'll never tell! I love your emotions with Sirius, because they are very love/hate and it is extremely amusing from this end. ♥ He genuinely thinks he is doing the right thing always, and he has what you call his wounded puppy look when he finds out he's wrong (when he almost invariably is) and you have made me love writing him more than I would have otherwise, just because you love him so much. AU scenario just for you: He and Sarah Wright ride Buckbeak into the sunset.

HE ISN'T DEAD YET, I SWEAR HE'S NOT. (Cackle.) And I know you've read the next chapter, too, but poor Beth in all aspects. :( In Sev's mind right now, nothing ever conflicted his love for Lily, which is why he thinks he turned spy in the first place -- to keep Lily safe. Canon, really, although things are /slightly/ more complex. Which you will seee!

/Crying/ with laughter at you wanting to shove Harry back up there, because first and foremost, OUCH. ♥ I will fully let you imagine that Lily's labor was nice and long and painful, because she rejected an epidural until it was too late and all those happy things.

~mum on what happens to Beth~ YOU ARE SERIOUSLY THE GREATEST. ♥ And this was a really, really sucky way of saying it, but gahhh. You and this story. You know this by now but you have fully made it what it is, and ITR would not be here without you.

Ponder that. :3

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Review #71, by ValWitch21 The Precaution

21st January 2013:

Rachel you're meeean (though thank you for the mention), how can you stop here?

I'm going to assume you won't have a scene where Lily and James die seeing as you already have a one-shot. I also wonder what era you're going to set Breaking Even; how Beth will react to Sirius' supposed betrayal; how her relation to Severus will evolve.

This was a short review, but I wanted to show my support (and how sad I was to see this story end, though it allows it to be cannon - so far).

Expect me to catch up on reviewing previous chapters soon enough, and if I don't, come and kick me in the right direction. Okay?


Author's Response: I'm sorry! ♥ Oh, do forgive me, Val -- and yes, of course you were mentioned! :) I'm actually still hugely thrilled to see you'd been keeping up with this story the whole time. Your name cropping up again really, really made my day!

I haven't decided yet what I'm doing about Lily and James, actually. In that one-shot, Beth doesn't exist, of course, so I might rewrite a chapter with their deaths... We'll see, really. :P I haven't gotten to that bit of the writing yet! Breaking Even will go into November 1981, and I do believe the last chapter is set a month or so after the course of events. I'm much too lazy to look at my outline, but I /think/ that's correct.

Short reviews are just as appreciated as long reviews, never you mind. ♥ And you do know you totally don't have to review, right? It would be lovely, but if you don't have the time, seriously -- don't worry about it! Thank you for being so supportive of this story, and just for everything. It seriously means so much. :)

Hope to see you back for book three! ♥

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Review #72, by Ardeith The Precaution

21st January 2013:
Thanks for the shout out! That kind of makes up for the hiatus in Sneth... I have to wait till 2/17?!? :-(

Anyway, very nice ending, in a middle book of the trilogy kind of way. I love how you put in there at the very end that Sev's memories of Beth still exist in Dumbledore's study. It gave me hope and set my mind whirring into how they can get back into Sev's head and why, etc.

Poor Beth! I wanted to give her a hug this time and tell her to keep her hopes and love alive. I'm wondering how the missing memories work. Does Sev not recognize her at all? Remember her vaguely as a Hogwarts classmate, who was friends with the Marauders? I'm trying to decide which would be more heartbreaking.

Author's Response: Not at all! ♥ You definitely deserved a shout-out... although it does come with a rather extended waiting period, I'll admit. But since I'm so behind at responding to reviews, I can say now that you only have a little over three weeks to go now!

I'm very proud of the way this book ended, and I'm glad you thought it was middle-book-in-a-trilogy-esque, because... well, it is! There is hope, make no mistake; Sev's memories are proof of that. Don't give up on him just yet! You'll see the effect the missing memories have on Severus in the next book; that's a fairly significant part of events there, actually.

Thank you so much for all the wonderful reviews on this story, and for being so, so supportive of it! ♥ There really aren't words to express just how far my gratitude towards you extends. I'm already very much looking forward to seeing your opinions of the third book, too!

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Review #73, by YouHadMeAtHogwarts A Year Later

21st January 2013:
I love the story-line! I really can't wait to see where you going with this. Job well done, you deserve a 10/10

Author's Response: Thank you so much for taking the time to leave me a review! I'm so pleased you like the story thus far -- it's one I've invested nearly two full years of my life in by now, so obviously I'm a bit attached. :P

I hope you find the time to read on, and I'm looking forward to hearing more of your opinions! I very much appreciate the 10/10!! ♥

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Review #74, by Cat The Precaution

21st January 2013:
And so this part of the story ends. Not sure though I agree to my own statement. Does ones fantasies ever end? I doubt it.
I have never really been the type to read fanfiction, since my own head is so full of my own stories, but as I said last time: Your writing skills never seem to fail you. You have produced a fanfic that can stand on it's own. You have managed to make me care about the characters. (Though I must admit, I have always been fond of Snape). You make them alive, and I can almost feel as if I knew them, all thanks to you portraying them so well.
So thank you, once again, for sharing the magic in your head. Really looking forward to see how it resoulves, and even if Severus won't ever remember Beth, she'll have the love for both of them. =)

Author's Response: And so this part of the story ends indeed. Although it's true -- stories never really end, as long as we remember them. Perhaps that's just me waxing poetic, but I also think it's true!

I cannot even begin to properly thank you for all the truly wonderful compliments you have paid me in this review. I am so, so glad that you gave this story a chance, and that you cared about my characters and thought I wrote them well. Even that you think I have talent at all -- I just... that means SO much, and I mean that with every part of me!

It has been an absolute joy and privilege to share my stories with others, especially people like you. ♥ I would love to see you return for "Breaking Even" too! February 17, it'll be up. I have much more in store for Beth and Severus, and the Marauders too!

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Review #75, by Ardeith July 31, 1980

15th January 2013:
Wow, I'm the first to review!

This was such a sweet chapter in so many ways. I love your Marauders (plus Beth, of course) and love how you show the relationships and affection between them. It's just so believable and real. I just wanted to hug Sirius here -- I love bouncy!Sirius. :-) And he was trying so hard to comfort Beth, even when he doesn't really see the appeal of Sev.

Of course, that makes it all so heartbreaking when you think what happens to James, Lily, Sirius and Harry in about a year.

And you're evil again trying to end on a hopeful note ("Maybe this is a sign that everything would eventually be all right again.")... Guess it's nice to give Beth some little happiness right now...

Author's Response: You are indeed the first to review! :) I'm so pleased you liked this chapter, especially coming after the sort of horrific one before it (though I'm not going to lie -- chapter 32 is one of my favorite of this entire plot so far!). There is such a strong friendship between all of them, and it's never more important than at this time in their lives, when the war is only getting worse, and James and Lily are about to be in serious jeopardy. Sirius welcomes your hugs, I assure you! ITR is his most hug-demanding book, because man, does he manage to mess a few things up. :P But then he's also rather endearing, if I do say so myself, and those times merit hugs, too.

Wow. That was a ramble! Ending on a hopeful note was probably a wee bit diabolical, yes. I promise, though -- I've got things in store! We certainly haven't seen the last of Severus, and you know, a bit of hope isn't a bad thing. Even a LOT of hope isn't a bad thing. Only time will tell what's in store!

Thanks a million times over, as always, for such a lovely review. ♥ I don't know where this story would be without you. Truly!

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