Reading Reviews for Beneath
  
110 Reviews Found

Review #26, by LightLeviosa5443 gun

13th February 2014:
FIRST! I think, unless someone beat me to it. But I hope I'm first. I'm gonna type super fast so I can for sure be first.

Wow. I'm obsessed.

Oh my god I love this story so much. I shouldn't be saying that during this chapter, but I already knew what was going to happen because I read the other version. This is definitely a change, but I don't know, I kind of like it. It's got more of an impact this way, in the other one you were mad at her, in this one you just feel really bad for her. You're more worried. I think this ended up being more powerful.

Maybe the change was for the best then!

I can't wait for the next chapter, I want to know how you're going to put what's going to happen next, and all of that interesting stuff. Obviously she's going to miss classes so people are going to know SOMETHING is up, I just want to know how that'll be handled. And the blood and the blades on the floor, are the girls going to come in to those?

OH MY GOODNESS IMAGINE THAT. Well, then she'd certainly have even more explaining to do. Sirius and Rainne though, I think I might be starting to ship them more than I'm shipping Rainne and Ben, and I know that's bad but I just can't help it.

Anyways, this chapter was fantabulous(really shouldn't call it that considering it's contents) and I can't wait to see what you're gonna do next (I should be afraid, shouldn't I?)

Poor Sirius, he should've seen the signs. Oh no, how is Remus going to take it. Because he DID see the signs!

xoxo Sarah

Author's Response: Gah I'm sorry it took me so long to respond. RL has been super hectic. But thank you for your amazing review! Eep!

I'm glad the change was a good one. I think I like this version better. Less is more, you know? I do wish I could have shown her regret, but it just didn't work with the guidelines. We'll see it soon enough though!

I don't want to spoil anything! I'm in the midst of writing the chapter now, and I have a rough idea of how everything will go. I'm a little foggy on a few details, but I can sort those out later, I think.

I don't think you should be TOO afraid. Though I will be pulling some [female dog] moves in the near future. Ugh I feel awful but it's so necessary for her to grow! And for the good things to be possible!

Anyway, I'm excited to see what you think of the rest, as always. Thank you so much for your detailed feedback. You already know it means a lot. Okay I'm going to get back to writing now! I'm excited!


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Review #27, by Vina numb

8th February 2014:
Thank you so much for your story, it is beautiful. Im so glad to read about some real emotions not just melodramatic ones (especially Maraudrs/OC fanfiction is full of those). Some feelings that you described I know very well so I can say nice job :) (for example when Remus is angry with smart people doing stupid thing, but still he wants help her).
There is just one thing that I can not believe. How Lily can not recognize her after years of sharing dormitory? Or others sharing classes? I think even if she is quiet, it seems not likely.
Thanks again I really enjoy it
(and sorry for my English)

Author's Response: Hi! Thank you so much for your review. Sorry it's taken me so long to respond - RL got in the way.
I have actually experienced something similar to Rainne. I went to the same elementary school four years and when I started middle school, several of my classmates thought they were meeting me for the first time. So I know it's possible, unlikely and strange, but possible.
I'm so glad you like my story -and don't worry, your English is fine!
Thank you again :)


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Review #28, by LightLeviosa5443 staying up

3rd February 2014:
AHHH YOU MENTIONED ME! oisadlkfmieowmsdlr. You're too sweet. I just like leaving spastic reviews that tell you how awesome your story is. ;)

Squealing about being mentioned aside, I saw your status, and my panicky self rushed to come see if the chapter you were talking about was up. I'm assuming it's not, as this is happy. I did, however, absolutely love this chapter.

It was so cute, and brilliant, and what is going on with Sirius and Rainne? WHO TOOK HER BLADES?! I'm like afraid, yet happy that they took them. So sweet that the girls got her a calming draught. OH MY GOODNESS IS THAT WHAT YOU DO IN THE NEXT CHAPTER?! YOU CAN'T MAKE HER OD.

I don't know. Now I'm just freaking out because you said something bad is going to happen.

I am unable to even. All I'm focusing on is every possible scenario in which things could go so badly that you make people CRY. I've got about 30 so far. I'm assuming that it doesn't involve Rainne dying, though, so I'm crossing my fingers and holding my breath.

Anyways, I love this story (as usual) and can't wait to read your chapter of crying. That's what I'm calling it until I read it!

xoxo Sarah

P.S. You're welcome darling, I think I forgot to say that in my squee.

Author's Response: EEP I CAN'T TELL YOU! But I'm really glad you like this chapter. It's kind of the calm before the storm... Just don't worry because it won't be 100% bad... closer to like 90% ;)
Oh, don't cry! Or do... if it's really that good! Which it probably won't be you honestly give me more credit than I deserve.
Anyway check your inbox!
And thanks again for faithfully reviewing, you're the best!


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Review #29, by luciusobsessed staying up

2nd February 2014:
I loved it! I loved the Lucius/Narcissa addition since they're my favorite couple ever. I feel like Ben and Rainne don't really communicate well. I'm starting to ship Sirius/Rainne honestly, I just feel like he's more sympathetic and understanding of her. The end was hilarious. Poor Remus, I could practically see his face. It made me want to have a good laugh with my own friends. I wish I had friends like the Marauders. Amazing job as usual, can't wait for the next.

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: Yay! I'm so glad :) It's interesting that you're shipping Sirius/Rainne. I feel bad that Ben is so oblivious, but he has never really suffered like her, so he doesn't know how to recognize the signs.

Oh my gosh I know exactly what you mean. I've always wanted to have a group of friends like this. It would be so much fun.

I can't wait to hear what you think of the next one. Thanks so much xx


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Review #30, by maraudertimes numb

1st February 2014:
Review tag!

Merlin, I love this for all the right reasons! You have perfectly written this, and I love all of it so much. I just want to reach into your story and hug the living daylights out of Rainne.

The emotions you've conveyed in just this chapter are striking and beautiful. I can feel Rainne's pain, I can feel her grandfather's pain, I can feel her doctor's frustration and Rainne's more-than-annoyance, and I can feel Lily's regret and the pity as well. I can feel. You have done a terrific job at this, because I can feel with every paragraph you have written.

And I love that Rainne isn't perfect, not even close to that. She is so close to rock bottom she can taste it, but she's not there yet. She's close, but she isn't. And I think Lily can help her crawl out of the hole and move away from rock bottom. I think the marauders can bring a bit more sunshine in her life.

Because Rainne deserves that and so much more, for being cast away, ignored, and forgotten. For feeling like self-harm is the only way out. I love this chapter because in less than 1300 words, you have brought me into this horrible world that Rainne lives in, and you've made me want to help her.

This is so brilliantly written that you have made me part of the story already. I think you've done an absolutely beautiful job, both in your writing and the way you've handled the extremely mature themes in this piece. Amazing job!
Lo:)

Author's Response: Oh my gosh thank you so much. You are so kind! I hate seeing Rainne in pain, but it's necessary in order for her to enjoy happiness, however seldom that may be. She is going to start a new life full of friends and laughs, and I'm excited for her.

I know exactly what you mean. I hate when I see people with mental illness glorified and seen as perfect. Nobody is perfect, and Rainne struggles because she knows that.

You are really giving me so much more credit than I deserve. Thank you so much for your amazing feedback. I hope to hear from you again :)


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Review #31, by Rumpelstiltskin numb

1st February 2014:
I'm here from Review Tag.

The depth of emotion that is displayed here is heartbreaking, really. It must be difficult, to be so troubled, to not have the capability to be happy. She's clearly suffering through some mental traumas and instabilities, leading up to her own self destruction/self-inflicted harm.

I think one of the most powerful moments was when she wished that she could be what her bracelets were (colorful and happy). It acts more than literally, I think, because the bracelets are covering the skin she mars. Thus, I can only be brought to the conclusion that she even wishes for the illusion of happiness, even if it only covers her pain. That one was clever, I think. Kudos on throwing that bit in.

Lily's innately kind, so I'm sure that she may be of some assistance to Rainne. I'm really curious to see how she will fit in with the Marauders. I suppose I'll have to wait at least until the next chapter to see any of those interactions.

Fantastic job!

-Rumpel

Author's Response: I feel like you're giving me a lot more credit than I deserve... I'm not sure I put as much thought into it as you have... But I'm glad you did!

Thank you so much for your detailed feedback. It really means a lot. I can't wait to see what you think of the rest!


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Review #32, by academica numb

1st February 2014:
Hello, stopping by from Review Tag :)

Kudos on taking on some serious themes in this story. I'm a therapist and I always love to see people try to explore the complex notion of mental illness and explore how different characters might react to those sort of struggles. I obviously find this subject matter very interesting but I don't run across very much of it on the archive, so this is a bit of a treat.

I really like your characterization for Rainne. She acts a lot like the teenagers I worked with when I was in an inpatient setting and it's interesting for me because I can understand both where she's coming from and where her doctor is coming from. I loved the bit of imagery you included with the contrast between the bracelets and her scar. It's quite sad to think about.

At least Lily wants to include her. I assume James and Lily are on decent terms at this point?

I also liked the little details you included, like how her parents wouldn't have died if they were magical because they wouldn't have needed to use a car. It's sad how Rainne has simplified those circumstances and used them to fuel her hatred of who she really is. I really pity her.

Nice work! Hope to come back and read more soon.

-Amanda

Author's Response: Thank you so much! It's so interesting to hear a therapist's opinion on my story - kind of intimidating, really! I hope you don't think anything is too far fetched, I've never had to deal with anything like her so I can never know if it's realistic enough.
Wow, you are giving me so much more credit than I deserve, really!
I can't wait to hear what else you think, I'm so intrigued by your unique point of view :)


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Review #33, by luciusobsessed glory and gore

31st January 2014:
WHY IS THIS THE LAST CHAPTER IM SO DEPRESSED!

A part of me has a feeling about where this is going, but at the same time I'm not sure. I feel like Ben is getting a little hands on, and not in a good way. And I think Sirius is the knight that rides in on his high horse. I'm just guessing though.

I like the bit with Narcissa added. She's one of my favorites ever. I'm just fascinated by the Slytherin/Death Eater bunch.

Please please please update soon. I'm dying. Your writing is so amazing. I can't wait for the next chapter :))

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: DON'T WORRY THE NEXT CHAPTER IS IN THE QUEUE.

Hmmm that's an interesting guess.

I'm fascinated by them too, I just don't think I could write a whole fic on them. Instead, I just feature them here and there.

Don't worry, I'll be updating pretty regularly, all I have to wait on is our amazing validators :)

Thank you so much for all of your reviews, it really means a lot that you would take all that time to give me your feedback. I can't wait to see what you think of the rest!


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Review #34, by luciusobsessed laura palmer

31st January 2014:
I have a feeling Ben is getting annoyed of her and now I'm getting annoyed of Ben. He needs to understand that she's been through a lot and he needs to be patient with her. I love Sirius. I love that bit about Andromeda that you put in. I'm obsessed with the Black sisters so that really made my day.

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: The thing is, Rainne hasn't opened up to Ben about her past. He knows her parents are dead, but that's about it. If she does tell him, what if he doesn't want to deal with the baggage? That's what she's wondering, anyway.
I love Sirius too. And I love writing anything to do with the Black family! So you'll be seeing more of them!


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Review #35, by luciusobsessed heart's a mess

31st January 2014:
Wow that was a fast make up. I expected more drama but I know there's more coming which will be great. It's nice though, that she's so easily forgiving. I think I would have been terrible to him haha. This Summer is really getting on my nerves but she's also giving me an adrenaline rush. I'm looking forward to the mess that's coming!

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: Oh I would have been so awful to Ben. But Rainne doesn't want to lose him, so she'll do anything to keep him. Summer's bit is a little ways off, but as you know, a summer storm is brewing! (see what I did there? haha)

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Review #36, by luciusobsessed flawless

31st January 2014:
BEN IS SUCH A JERK! I didn't expect him to be so mean! Oh I could have slapped him if I had the opportunity. I love this chapter. This might be my new favorite. I love how Sirius is the one who comforted her. He seems like a better boyfriend than Ben at this point? Couldn't he see she was just having fun? I can't wait till she goes off on him. I'm actually nervous to see what Sirius just walked into. Amazing!!

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: I don't want to say anything that will spoil it for you, so for now I'm just going to say thank you for the review! ;)

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Review #37, by luciusobsessed far too young to die

31st January 2014:
I love the tension between them, and how easily it can disappear. Everyone is starting to pick up on her eating habits, and any day now Ben should do. I'm super excited about this party because I know something bad is going to happen that will make Rainne go crazy. Can't wait!!

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: Ben is more oblivious than you think, he's just so focused on making sure everything is okay, that he doesn't realize it's not. Ahh, yes, the party. I loved writing it. You are so good at predicting everything!

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Review #38, by luciusobsessed boyfriend

31st January 2014:
OMG I knew this Summer *** was going to come back and bite hard! I'm so excited, it's going to cause so much drama between and Ben and Rainne, and the more drama, the merrier. I really want to leave a longer review but I really want to read the next chapter. Don't worry, there will be more to come :))

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: Yes, I love drama! It's so fun to write. Don't worry, you've left me so many reviews! Thank you so much!

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Review #39, by luciusobsessed falling

31st January 2014:
Yay! I'm so happy they're finally together. I can't believe she has so many negative thoughts. It's like this whole other voice in her head and it's set on driving her to insanity. And I didn't expect her to cut as much, especially since she seems happier now. I'm really excited for Ben to find out (that was a horrible thing to say lol).

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: I know I feel awful for her. But it's kind of like... the voice convinces her that she doesn't deserve to be happy, so she subconsciously does whatever she can to ruin everything. It's awful, but if it wasn't that way I don't think it would be realistic :(
And I'm glad you're excited for Ben to find out... I mean, it's what's best for her, right? So don't worry, it wasn't a horrible thing to say :)


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Review #40, by luciusobsessed kiss me

31st January 2014:
This was such a cute chapter. I love the subtle emotional connection between Ben and Rainne. I want them to be official already, even though they already are technically. James is adorable; I can actually picture how childishly he calls Lily 'Lily flower.' It's so cute. I don't like this Summer girl one bit. I feel like she's going to be trouble. I'm looking forward to the drama haha. When they were going to go swimming, I knew Rainne would be insecure about it, but I liked that. She's still transitioning out of her insecurities. Speaking of transitioning, I love how she naturally grew to be herself around the girls. The pace is very calm and enjoyable. Off to the next chapter!

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: Ohh Summer's a real b. I hate her, but I love writing her. Again, sometimes I feel like I'm moving the story too fast so I'm glad I'm not. I just love writing it and I want to move the plot to what I'm looking forward to! It's coming up...!

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Review #41, by luciusobsessed prom song (part two)

31st January 2014:
This is my favorite chapter so far, hands down.

Let me start off by saying this: Death Eaters entrance, fantastic. It was such a majestic way to begin the chaos.

Second, my favorite part of this chapter was no doubt when James jumped in front of Lily and shouted NEVER. I'm pretty sure I shouted oh my god and shrieked like a silly school girl. It was perfect. If Lily doesn't start liking him now, then she's crazy.

Third, a jaguar? That's amazing. It hadn't really crossed my mind what animagus Ben would be, but you definitely gave him class. Once again, majestic.

I'm dying right now. This story is too perfect. I haven't been this excited about a story for a long time. Love love love!!

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: Lily is crazy... but that's why we love her! I love James, he's so great. I don't know why, but a jaguar was the first animal that I thought of and it just really stuck. This makes me so happy! I'm grinning like crazy, thank you so much!!

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Review #42, by luciusobsessed prom song (part one)

30th January 2014:
GOLDEN SNITCH IS GENIUS. Now I know what I'm going to be for Halloween this year, no joke. I'm super excited about it too. I loved this chapter. I love how Ben slipped up behind her and slid his arms around her waist. It was a very sensual moment. I think when Sirius caught her eye was a very deep and touching moment. I hope their friendship grows. I love where this story is going. I really want more cigarette action and I want Ben involved in it. Can't wait to read the next chapter!

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: I know right! I want to do it too, it would be so awesome... I'm so glad you're liking it so much!

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Review #43, by luciusobsessed girls

30th January 2014:
And Remus finally speaks. I love how he put her on the spot like that, and I like even more how it didn't go unnoticed. Now that Lily is watching her more closely, it's going to be harder for her to hide these habits. Your writing style is amazing. You very naturally transition into different points of view and it's very pleasant to read. Loving it!

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: Ahhh thank you so much! I always feel like it's choppy so I'm really happy to hear that it doesn't come off that way!

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Review #44, by luciusobsessed i'll never forget you

30th January 2014:
This was so short :( But it's okay because there so many chapters to come and all I can think about is reading them. I'm glad she said she would date Ben, and I'm happy she's opening up to the girls now too. I really expected her to hurt herself when her grandma died. I don't know, maybe she still will.

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: I know it was short, I just felt this was a good stopping point. I doubt I'll ever have a chapter this short. But I'm glad you like where it's going :)

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Review #45, by luciusobsessed shelter

30th January 2014:
Holy. Crap. Poor Rainne. That revelation to Sirius was such a smart way to go about it. I'm glad he didn't tell Ben. I feel so bad for Rainne. Finding that out, that her parents' heads fell on her, makes it easier to understand why she has so many problems. This chapter was amazing.

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: I know, I always feel like I'm so mean to her. But she has so many great things coming... as well as more bad things... bad mostly good things I promise!

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Review #46, by luciusobsessed nuclear seasons

30th January 2014:
This chapter made me so sad, but it was so powerful. I can't believe her grandma died. She didn't even have a chance to say goodbye. I feel like she's going to do something really stupid. That's the worst thing that could have happened after losing her parents. I can't believe Ben kissed her. I mean, perfect timing right? I can't stop reading so off to the next chapter.

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: I hate being so awful to her :( But in the long run this will be good for her, as bad as that sounds. And it is a bit bittersweet moment since Ben was there, so you never know... Thank you so much!

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Review #47, by luciusobsessed velvet crowbar

30th January 2014:
I love how you went about this! I love that Remus finds out her secret before anyone else. I feel like Remus doesn't usually get enough of the spotlight in Marauder fics, and you put him in the center of it and it's so good. I really want Ben to find out and I can't wait to see his reaction.

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: Thank you! I want to try and include every character, because I feel sometimes fics tend to focus on only one or two, and I hate that!

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Review #48, by luciusobsessed tears and rain

30th January 2014:
I'm really happy Rainne is getting better. I feel like she's working on herself and falling into her own rhythm. I can tell she is very defensive. She has a lot of walls and trust issues and like I said in an earlier review, I see some qualities of myself in her. She makes me want to diet haha. Amazing chapter. I'm excited for her to go to the Quidditch match.

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: Yes, I feel like deep down she knows it's wrong, and she doesn't want her new friendships to be ruined by it.
Oh, no! You don't need to diet. Diets are so lame! They never even work. But I'm glad you can relate to Rainne, sometimes I think she might be a bit out there, so it's good that she still seems realistic.
Can't wait to hear what you think of the next chapter. Thanks again!


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Review #49, by luciusobsessed teen idle

30th January 2014:
Aww poor Rainne, in some ways she reminds me of myself. I tend to think that way, that "maybe he left because I'm annoying" and i tend to overthink things sometimes. I like how she's opening up more to Ben. I also love how Penn Badgley is Ben. I love Gossip Girl and he's so cute!! I think my favorite part of this chapter was the cute James/Lily moment. I really love how determined James is, it gives me hope. Amazing chapter, once again.

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: I know, I'm like that too! I always think that people get annoyed with me -even though I know they clearly aren't. It's so easy to beat yourself up.
Originally Ben was Joseph Gordon-Levitt, but I think Penn fits better, don't you?
James is just so cute. I love how much he loves Lily. *romantic sigh*

Thank you so much for your amazing reviews :) I'm so glad you're liking this!


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Review #50, by luciusobsessed how can i

30th January 2014:
Oh my god this is amazing. This story is getting better and better. I love love LOVE Rainne. She is so dark and yet so beautiful in so many ways. I wasn't sure how I felt about Benjamin replacing Peter in the last chapter, but I really like him after reading this one. I can tell he's already into her, and I'm so excited to see where this goes. I also really like how Lily is so bothered by the fact that she never made an effort with Rainne. One part that really stood out to me was when you said Rainne pretended not to see the thestrals. That was so intense for me. I love this.

luciusobsessed

Author's Response: Wow, thanks for reviewing so quickly! You are so kind, really.
Yeah, I was unsure of whether or not to go through with replacing Peter, but I just really don't like him at all. And I liked the idea of having a blank slate for a Marauder.
Eep I can't wait to see what you think of the rest of the story :)
Thanks so much xx


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