Reading Reviews for A Perfect Mess
53 Reviews Found

Review #26, by mizzxpearl A Late Night

23rd February 2010:
Hey! I'm here from the forums for to grant you your review! :D

Okay, first off let me say, I actually really like this story! Especially the second chapter, I really like Scorpius's character. But my favorite has to be James! Haha, my 'eleven year old sister'.'she's sixteen'. That made me laugh so much!

Umm, well, now that we already know that Scorpius and Rose are into each other, I wonder where you're going to take this story. It's only the second chapter, and they already like each other! But, I'm sure you have a nice plot waiting.

I kind of wish that you stuck with cannon a bit. Like since Victorie DOES have a part veela sister, you might as well have named her Dominique instead of Arianna and given her her brother Louis. And you might as well have named Percy's daughter Molly instaed of Gracie. I don't know, it's personal preference, and I'm a cannon freak. :P It's just if I was happen to have crossed this story and read it, I probably wouldn't have moved onto the second chapter only beacuse of the characters you listed. Which would have been a shame, because like I said before, I really really enjoyed it so far!

I really suggest getting a beta, because you have fragment sentences a lot. It's a little distracting, but your story is gripping enough that I can forget about it. Still, if you get a beta, your story will improve loads!

All in all, I really like this! Sorry I took so long to review! I've had a lot of homework to do lately (should be doing some right now, actually). :/ Hehe. I read this story two days ago, but I just got around to reviewing it now. Anyway, pleaseee rerequest, I would love to see where you take this! :D

Keept it up! :D

Author's Response: Thank you so much! First of all, I completly agree with you about the character naming. See the thing was I started this story not knowing JK had made a list of all the nextgen kids. I knew the ones from the epilouge (obviously) but it wasn't till I'd already put up the first chapter that my friend pointed out my huge error. I hadn't really read any nextge before i wrote my own, and now that i've read more next gen stories i feel like a dumby for not knowing she had a whole family tree. *sigh* being uncannon makes me cringe a bit, but i can't do much now seeing as it would be quite confusing renaming half my characters.

But anyway, I'm glad you like the line about the ages, it was one of my favorites (:

Beta's: I agree, and my friend who is good with grammar has beta'd a few of them (ch.3&4) for me, but her she's been swamped with homework like you, and hasn't been able to help me out lately. But if she doesn't get around to helping me soon i'll be sure to seek out some beta's at the forums (:

I also felt they started to like eachother a little to soon, so I'm trying to fix that. I was just so anxious to get them together that I didn't build up the relationship the way i was planning, but hopefully i'll make up for it in later chapters.

I will definetly re-request, your review was very helpful (:

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Review #27, by spangles A beginning;

23rd February 2010:
Hello, spang;es from the forums here with your review!

Though this was just an introductary chapter, I have to say that I really enjoy it. Rose's personality was really shown of through this chapter in the description- something I really have to commend you on. It's nice to see someone's character shown through other wasys than 'Rose was mad'.

I also have to appluade on on doing this first person, you did a pretty good job with it, making it sound like Rose is writing the story as it goes along (I liked the note about the smart Muggles, but I was kind of offended, for I'm a witch silly :p). The chapter wasn't even that long but it coverd a huge amount of information AND it wasn't boring, something that's kind of hard to do. More applause!

As for flow and all that technical stuff, I think you did fine. There was obviously no dialouge in this chapter but the fact that it was in first person still made me feel like it was a conversation- I really liked it. I know I already said this once but I'm going to say it again because I really feel the need to stress this- you're awesome at writing in first person.

As for the plot, it's one that's done a lot, but I like the twist you've but on it. You've given Rose a lot more indpendence and almost joking side than most people do, which makes me want to keep reading. I also like the fact that she has a secret crush on Malfoy, but she's dating someone. Oh, cliff hanger! I've got to say that was an amazing way to end a chapter, great cliffie.

So, to conclude great first chapter! 10/10 ~spangles.

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review! You're very detailed.

I'm glad you like my first person, I just felt like I couldn't do her character justice if I wrote in 3rd person. I know that it is a very common plot *cringe*, i almost didn't write this fic because of that very reason, but I went for it anyway, hoping my story might be alittle different than all the others. *crosses fingers*

and sorry about offending you mam! haha of course YOUR a witch, but there's alot of muggles out there who could be reading this!

Anyway, thank you SO much for this review, i'll be sure to be coming back to your review thread soon! You rock (:


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Review #28, by Kirsty Weasley Three's a Crowd

19th February 2010:
Yay for updating! Love this chapter, wish Rose had stood up for Scorpius when James was fighting him though! Anyway all in all an awesome chapter :D - Kirsty xxx

Author's Response: Thank you! I was tempted to do just that, but you know how the Weasley's are very family oriented, so I felt it was too early for her to pick Scorps side over her family. But it may not always be that way! Thanks again for the revieww (:

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Review #29, by spam_up_sam Three's a Crowd

19th February 2010:
Favourite character...Scorpius, you make him really sweet when he's with Rose =]
I thought the argument between James and Scorpius went very well. I could just imagine James being quite volatile like that, and that those two characters would wind each other up so easily.
Lovely chapter, I do hope Rose and Scorpius can work it out =]

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review (:

Scorpius is such a blast to write, I adore him. And I'm glad you approve of the little spat between those too. It had me worried! And Rose and Scorp will work it out, eventually (:


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Review #30, by crazy_isthenew_normal Three's a Crowd

18th February 2010:
Aaah! Loved this chapter (: Hated that Rose and Scorpius had a falling out though - I was looking forward to them going to the three broomsticks together! Aaaah well :) It was still a mighty good chapter (:

My favourite character? Hmmm...Rose by far! I do like Scorpius P.O.V. however, and I can't wait for the next one - I want to find out why he ditched Rose O:

10/10, as ever (:

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! Yeah, I just had to do it. I was getting the feeling that they were getting close kinda fast, and considering they just started to get to know eachother I wouldn't have much to build from if i started off with them too in lovee. So I had to put in a little bit of begining of friendship conflict, if you know what i mean ahah.

I'm glad you like Rose, she's really fun to write. Same with Scorp (: Almost done with chapter 6, i'll probably put it in the queue this weekend.

Your new chappie was wonderful btw, update your story soon! (:

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Review #31, by i~heart~youu Three's a Crowd

18th February 2010:
awww that chapter was kinda depressing =( please tell me it will get happier!!?? it was really well written though =) still love it too!

Author's Response: it will! I promise it gets happierr (: just be patient. Thanks for all your reviews, they make my day! You rock!

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Review #32, by spam_up_sam Friends?

31st January 2010:
Ahhh I do love Scorpius =] this one is very sweet, and it was cute when he was indecisive as to whether or not he should follow Rose out after her argument with James.
I think the chapter lengths are fine, you get loads of stuff in and it's quick to read. As for the Rose/Scorp interaction, it was good. Their dialogue felt more relaxed in this one so its reflecting how they're becoming accustomed to one another.
Anyway, hope you update soon =]

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the lovely review! *Sighs in relief* I'm glad to hear that, I sometimes worry that their interaction isn't always the best, so Im happy you approve!

Chapter 5 is almost done, I just need to do a little editing. (:


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Review #33, by crazy_isthenew_normal Friends?

30th January 2010:
O: Oh my God! A cliffhanger! Nooo >_< I'm all curious as to what's going to happen next - I bet only one person will be there, and Rose will tell them her secret...or maybe not :L

I can't wait for the next chapter to be up! 1000/10 as always (:

Btw, I think that the length of your chapters are perfect, and I love the interaction between Rose and Scorpius (:

Author's Response: hmm well you'll have to wait to the next chapter :) I'm glad you apporve of my chapter lenghs and interraction :D I worry about that haha. And yeah still delicate needs to uodate like now and daisy needs to disappear! Oh and I know what you mean about writing what yer reading, when I'm reading maurader fics I wanna write in that era. And I started this rosescorp fic not too long after reading the delicate stories lol. Thanks for the great review :)

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Review #34, by i~heart~youu Friends?

30th January 2010:
yay! i love it! ^^ chapter length is god and the entire story is YAY! haha i love it! cant wait for the next chapter!

ps why did you have to leave it there!? uughh!! =P

Author's Response: haha this review went twice, but thanks again :)

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Review #35, by i~heart~youu Friends?

30th January 2010:
yay! i love it! ^^ chapter length is god and the entire story is YAY! haha i love it! cant wait for the next chapter!

ps why did you have to leave it there!? uughh!! =P

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it! :D And its good to hear the chapter length is alright! And i'm sorry! I know cliffies are evil, but i couldn't help myself *smiles guiltily*

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Review #36, by Kirsty Weasley Friends?

30th January 2010:
Eek! Is anyone there? Is she in trouble? Please update soon! -kirsty xx

Author's Response: You'll have to wait till the next chapter to find out! haha I don't want to give anything way (: I'll be putting chapter five up for validation soon, I just need to edit if for grammar/spelling and what not. Thanks for the review! and i'm glad you like your banner (:

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Review #37, by slytherin_sex_god An Interesting Day

23rd January 2010:
SCORPIUS COULD mAKE ME SwOOn ANyDAy, YA KNoW what I'M SAYIng? HAHAHAHH love this chappie (i always do!) . YOU RULE! 101/10

Author's Response: hmm yes he is a pretty charming fellow, ermm.

i'm glad you loved it. you rule as well for reviewing. wooo!

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Review #38, by slytherin_sex_god A Late Night

23rd January 2010:
OMGZIES TALKING IN THE LIBRARY?! crazy! I wish i were that cool :D another amazing chappie lad. I heart your writing.

10 /10

Author's Response: I'm glad you 'heart it'! yes i suppose talking in the library is rather crazy...

thank you for the review!

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Review #39, by slytherin_sex_god A beginning;

23rd January 2010:

You have SO much talent. you rock! Can't wait for more !!!

Author's Response: hahah thanks... you rock too!

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Review #40, by whacked A beginning;

22nd January 2010:
Hello! Just thought that since you asked ever so nicely, I'd drop by and take a look.

I like the way you've made the chaarcters, well, at least hwo much we've seen of them. I think you shoudl be careful though about going into too much detail about introductions; they can get a little tiresome.

But yes, looking forward to the next chapter! Rose sounds interesting.

Author's Response: thank you very much! yes i don't like the first chapter very much, and once i get a few more chapters done i'm going to go back and do some serious editing (:

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Review #41, by horcrux An Interesting Day

19th January 2010:
wow... this chappy (shivers. i know we both hate that word) was exceptionally grammatically correct. Hmmm... I wonder why Ms. "I split my infinitives and use the incorrect forms of they're and there!" No matter, lucky that Padfoot will always be around to save the day. And yes, that is Lucius Malfoy (to an extent). {POTTER FANS UNITE!!!}... tomorrow. where the next chapter @!?

Author's Response: chappie* duh. (shivers and shakes) Yeah well i guess the grammar is pretty good because you beta'd it. yeah i admit it, you're better than me at grammar. BIG WOOP. Do you want a trophy? I'll get you one asap. Of course we will unite tomorrow Padfoot, and i'm glad your going to save the day.

love, prongs (:

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Review #42, by horcrux A Late Night

19th January 2010:
Great Job Kiddo! Looking forward to the next chapter that I get to beta, will get four to you as soon as I possibly can. Love the Erin reference by the way. Nice read Prongs! 10/10

Author's Response: well howdy padfoot, i'm glad you liked it! I also enjoy the Erin reference, i think the name erin is grand. i'll be sending you chapter 5 when it is done. ps:send me an eyeball

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Review #43, by crazy_isthenew_normal An Interesting Day

15th January 2010:
I saw that you'd posted the third chapter yesterday, but I didn't get a chance to read it 'cause I was busy :( BUT I READ IT TODAY! :D And I wasn't dissappointed - as brilliant as ever (:

Author's Response: haha Im glad you liked it! (: Chapter 4 is done and I'm working on chapter 5, so updates should be coming in the near future, and I'm eagerly awaiting your stories update! so good! haha thanks for the review dear :D

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Review #44, by i~heart~youu An Interesting Day

14th January 2010:
i love this chapter! i can honestly say that i was smiling through most of it ^^ good work and it did make sense im waiting eagerly for the next chapter!

Author's Response: thank you so much! I'm done with chapter 4, but i currently have a one-shot in the queue so it will about 2 weeks. I'm so glad you liked it, thanks for the review, they mean alot (:

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Review #45, by spam_up_sam An Interesting Day

13th January 2010:
Aw look at that shout out up there!! You're pimping my stories =D lol thank you very much, hope your banner making is going well!
I think this chapter is good, it makes sense, it flows, there's humour through it. Rose is beginning to feel suitably conflicted about Mitch and Scorpius, which can only get worse after their detention and shopping 'date'.
I'm looking forward to the future chapters =]
p.s, I write nearly everything without planning, sometimes it feels more daring to go off on a tangent lol

Author's Response: ahah well i thought you deserved a shout out for being so helpful! alas, I discorved my banner making skills aren't that steller, so I'll probably end up going to TDA. I tried requesting one on there eairler, but it kept saying error, ahah.

I'm glad you liked it! and that it makes sense, aha i always worry that what i write will only make sense to me. And its good im not the only one who writes without a plan, aha if i plan too much then it never comes out right, so i like to go with the floww (:

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Review #46, by Brittany A Late Night

1st January 2010:
This is my second time coming across this story, and the second read was just as good as the first =]
I can't wait for you to be able to continue this =]

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I really appreciate it. Chapter 3 is done and I wrote a good chunk of Chapter 4 today, so as soon as the queue is back open i'll be posting more. I hope you continue to enjoy the story (: And your my first review of '10! sweeet

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Review #47, by crazy_isthenew_normal A beginning;

29th December 2009:
Love the first chapter - it's so well written, and had me laughing in parts (:

Author's Response: Thank you very much! I'm glad you like it (: I've finished chapter 3 so that should be up when the queue reopens. I like your penname btw!

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Review #48, by anonymous A Late Night

29th December 2009:
i really like it tbh, good writing.

Author's Response: Thank you very much anonymous, I try my best (: I have the next chapter done so be on the look out for an update once the queue opens.

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Review #49, by thereallilypotter A Late Night

28th December 2009:
ooh i love this chapter, there's so much scorose action! and i just dont like rose/mitch (prolly cuz he's not scorpius), although they seem cute together. rose and scorpius are ADORABLE, its like they both like eachother but they both think the other person's too good for them. ahhh i hope they get together and she dumps mitch! update soon, please!

Author's Response: Thanks again for the review, they mean alot to me! There's alot more Scorpius and Rose action coming up soon. haha i don't blame you for not likng Mitch, I'm a Ro/Scorp shipper myself. I have chapter 3 done and part of 4, so i'll be updating as soon as the queue opens up!

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Review #50, by thereallilypotter A beginning;

28th December 2009:
i like the writing, but you have the family tree all wrong. percy and audrey have twin daughters, molly and lucy, and george and angelina's children are Fred the second and Roxanne. oh, and bill and fleur's children are Victoire, Dominique, and Louis. if you go to jk rowling's website, and go to the eraser and click on the dark mark, you can find a complete family tree. i suppose it's your creative license as a writer, but just telling you that the official family tree is not the same as yours so it might confuse some readers. i really like the story so far though! keep up the great work.

Author's Response: Yeah I realized that the family tree was wrong. when I started writing this story I had completely forgetten that Jk rowling had put a family tree on her website. I'm sorry if it's confusing, I was going to go back and change it after a friend of mine pointed that out but i decided that it wouldn't really make sense if i just changed all the characters names. Thanks for the review though, i appreciate it!

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