Reading Reviews for A Halloween Visit
33 Reviews Found

Review #26, by Elphaba and Boyfriends A Halloween Visit

25th October 2013:
Hi, Elphaba here with your requested review!

I enjoyed this vignette, and think it fits just fine with the series canon. :)

I think you do a good job writing Harry, here. I can definitely imagine him wanting to visit his parents' grave on such a momentous occasion. His pain is certainly understandable, too. I think it also makes sense for him to talk to the graves; he's talked to their spirits with help from the Resurrection stone, so it doesn't seem odd for him to speak aloud to them again, even if he can't see them this time.

One little technical detail: Instead of Harry getting, "an empty grave dug for his fallen godfather," I think he would have just had the memorial stone put up.

Then, this line had me slightly confused because Harry says "miss" twice: "I miss you both, and I miss you all." Did you mean to say something like, "I love you both, and I miss you all?" Otherwise, maybe he would just say, "Happy Halloween, I miss you all."

Although I really like that this story is short and sweet, there is one thing I think you may want to add. That is a specific message from Harry to Sirius. How would Sirius react to Harry's news? Maybe Harry would anticipate Sirius's response and reply to it.

I think you get the wistful tone to this piece just right. Sometimes, trying something different pays off. :) Thanks for sharing!

Author's Response: Hey! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing.

I am pleased you enjoyed this and think it fits with canon.

I tried my best to write Harry well so I am glad it worked for you. It's great that you can imagine something like this happening and that it made sense to you the way he talked to them.

Thanks for pointing that part about the memorial stone, I'll go back and change =)

Oh oops, I didn't realise that, it was a typo. It was supposed to be "I love you both, and I miss you all." yeah xD

Ah that sounds like a nice idea. I'll incorporate Harry talking to Sirius for sure when I edit.

I am glad you liked it, thanks for your valuable feedback!

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Review #27, by academica A Halloween Visit

20th October 2013:
Hello Angie, here with your requested review :)

I really liked this story. It was heartwarming and I couldn't help but think of the imagery associated with a crisp autumn morning - cloudy skies, leaves falling, a slight chill in the air. Fall is my favorite time of year and I really loved the atmosphere your story created for me.

I think you did just fine with Harry's characterization. It was nice to see him able to feel happiness and excitement even after the war and all of the death that he endured. He seems to have accepted the deaths of those close to him rather than being angry or depressed about them. It was a lovely touch there at the end to have his family watching him from afar and sharing in his joy, even if they were in a different world.

I liked the plot, too. I think the short length works well and the story definitely achieves its purpose, which seemed to be just a short drabble about Harry's way of honoring his loved ones. I also think the story fits in well with canon, so I certainly wouldn't worry about that.

Finally--the dialogue looks good, too. I could definitely hear Harry speaking those words in his voice and sounding very natural, if a bit subdued. You really captured the person I think of when I think about adult Harry, the man quietly standing at King's Cross sending his children off to school for another term. The tone here was really nice and just very well done.

I don't have any critique for you, I'm afraid. Nice job, and I hope this review is helpful :)


Author's Response: Hey Academica! Thanks a ton for your lovely review.

I am pleased you found the story heartwarming and that you could visualise the autumn morning I tried to create. It's a great compliment coming from you as your imagery is always perfect =)

It's such a relief to have you say that Harry's characterisation was fine. I tried to show that the war had made him accept the deaths of the people he loved and he had come to terms with it so I am glad that came across well. My favourite part was writing the end of them watching over him so I am pleased you liked that too.

I was worried that this was perhaps a little too short but I am glad the length works for you. It is indeed a drabble about just that =) I usually don't write much canon-compliant stuff so I am happy that this fit it in well with canon!

The dialogue is always a problem with me but you've really put my worries at ease by saying that it sounded natural and showed an adult Harry.

No critique? OMG you've made my day! Thank you so much =) Your review put a big smile on my face and was definitely helpful!

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Review #28, by Dark Whisper A Halloween Visit

19th October 2013:
Awe, Aditi...
This was so very bittersweet. I thought you did a lovely job with this. I especially loved that he wanted to tell them first. It tells how much they all still mean to him. And I love Hermione's idea as well... together in death.

And finally, I loved that you wrote of their reaction... that they heard and responded. Very heartwarming.

Dark Whisper

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. I absolutely love random reviews so I am glad you stopped by.

I am glad you found it bittersweet and liked my idea of what Harry would do, as well as Hermione's idea of them being together in death.

The reaction was my favourite part so I am pleased you liked that too. Thank you!

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Review #29, by Illuminate A Halloween Visit

15th October 2013:
Hi! Review Tag!

This is a really touching, sad story. I know in your Authors Note you want to know how your characterisation of Harry is- it's great. He feels very authentic, and that he's grown up a little bit since the end of DH (and since I guess this is set a little after, that seems right).

It is a lovely idea to bury the Marauders (minus Wormtail) together, and Tonks with Lupin. I think they would have preferred that.

The prose and dialogue was written very well, the pace was just fine. The only thing that jumped out at me was when you mentioned that Andromeda had taken Teddy in- unless this is the first time Harry's visited their graves I would have thought that's something he'd mention before. Other than that I couldn't see anything.

Totally nitpicky I know xD Great job!

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks a lot for reading and reviewing.

I am pleased you found this touching and that Harry felt authentic to you. It is set just a few months after the second wizarding war yeah.

I always felt like they should have been buried together and I am glad you liked the idea.

It's a relief to know that the prose and especially the dialogue was fine as well as the pace. I actually felt that Andromeda would have not taken in Teddy immediately after the war as she'd have needed time to grieve and get herself together. Until then he'd have stayed in the Burrow. But that's just my little head canon xD

Thanks so much for your lovely review!

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Review #30, by Cannons A Halloween Visit

15th October 2013:
Review Tag :)

This was such a sad one shot. I loved how all of them were buried next to each other, and how you mentioned Sirius' grave was empty.

I think this it's such a Harry thing to do, to go by himself sneaking out almost. It's nice that something good happened to him on Halloween for once.

The bit about Teddy changing his appearance in the nursery was a nice touch as well.

The ending, the last three lines, were so sad you almost got me. ;) That's such a great thing to imagine them being able to hear him talk to them.

It was really good, I enjoyed it :D

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing.

I am pleased you liked how they were buried next to each other and the little detail about Sirius' grave being empty.

It's nice to know that you think it was very Harry-like to go by himself as I was afraid I was making him out-of-character.

I liked putting in the little detail about Teddy so I am happy you liked that too.

The ending was sad yeah, but I am glad it touched you.

Thank you!

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Review #31, by kristyhes A Halloween Visit

15th October 2013:
Aww! You really got me there it was really cute and quite sad..

I think you did great and for a first attempt at writing Harry it was quite good and you did not go out of character. It was full of emotions and I think that the flow and the content was good. And I agree with the fact that he would have gone to tell them about him marrying Ginny. It's just so Harry.

Overall it was a really good one-shot!!


Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for reading and reviewing. I am glad you found it both cute and sad as that was my aim.

It's such a relief to hear that you think I wrote Harry good and he didn't seem out of character. I am also glad that the emotions came across even though this was so short. It's nice to know that you agree with the plot too =)

Thank you!

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Review #32, by marauderfan A Halloween Visit

14th October 2013:
Review Tag!

Awww, this was really cute! I thought it seemed appropriate that Harry went to visit their graves on Halloween - for Harry that's a day associated with loss, so it was nice he was able to reconnect (in a way) with them.

I like the details you added about the kids in the neighbourhood - small things like that do so much in setting a scene, and it set the tone of this as a more light-hearted Halloween from the beginning.

You wrote Harry really well! For your first time attempting to do so, it was great! This definitely seemed like something he would do, and didn't seem out of character.

Overall, lovely little one-shot :)

Author's Response: Hey! Thank you for reading and reviewing.

I am pleased you liked this, and you find Harry visiting the graves on Halloween appropriate.

I always like putting in little details like that so I am glad you liked them and they set the tone for you.

It's a huge relief to hear that you think I wrote Harry well. I was very afraid of writing him but I finally jumped the boat xP I am pleased you didn't find him out of character.


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Review #33, by Rumpelstiltskin A Halloween Visit

14th October 2013:
Aww, this is so sweet...and sad!

I think my favorite part is when Harry is talking about Teddy to his parents. It tugged at my heart a little :).

This is very well written and I enjoyed it very much! It was a defiantly a nice quick read!


Author's Response: Hey! Thank you so much! Yours is the first review on the story xD I am pleased you found it sweet and sad, and that you liked the Teddy part. Thanks =)

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